The Property PlaybookWith settlement just around the corner, today's diarist is currently at the pointy end of selling a property. But her story is a little different because she's selling her half to her ex. She's $10,000 deep in legal fees so far, but the silver lining is that the house is now worth more than double since they built it in 2019. And with a big profit to look forward to, this is her chance to set herself up for life!
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Hello, and welcome back to The Property Playbook, the podcast where we take you from A to V of all things property. My name is Jessica Ricky, and I'm hoping that one day i can buy my first home. But until then, I'm chatting to people from our community along the way to learn a little bit more about their stories to hopefully selfishly help myself and you at home. Today, I've got a diarist who has been on what sounds like a little bit of a journey, so let me tell you what she said. Hi, team, big fan over here. I'm currently at the pointy end of selling a property with settlement just around the corner. But my story is little different to the usual sale. I'm selling half to my ex. He's buying me out of the property. It's been hairy, to say the least. I'm over ten thousand dollars deep into legal fees so far, but we built the house together, and it's now worth more than double since then, almost double and a half. Also, I have a silly big profit coming my way soon, and this is my chance to set myself up for life, all thanks to tips learned from She's on the Money Property Diarist. Thank you so much for joining me today. How are you?
Thank you for having me? I'm good. Thanks, How are you?
I'm really good. I'm interested to hear a little bit more about how this has worked for you, because we did a diary recently with somebody who purchased with someone who wasn't a partner. It was her brother and she's being brought out by him. But it's obviously a very different scenario to what you found yourself in. So I'm interested to dive in and hear a little bit more about your experience. But let's start at the top, and can you tell me when and where did you guys purchase.
We purchased in twenty nineteen in the out of supper of Melbourne that a nar and a half from Melbourne in a small coastal town.
Oh beautiful, what a dream near the coast. How much did you earn at the time and what were you doing for work.
So at the time I was working as a disability support worker. I was earning about, I think from memory, about sixty five thousand dollars a year. And my partner at the time was earning quite similar.
What was he doing for work?
He was a trades assistant.
Yeah, okay, amazing. And how much did you guys spend on that total purchase?
I think I've tried to crunch the numbers. I think from memory we're looking at about forty five thousand dollars down payment. We then, of course had first home owners grand and other kind of schemes like that that came into it.
So that forty five thousand dollars was your deposit that you put down. How much was the purchase of the house.
The purchase of.
The house for the land we purchased for one hundred and ninety five thousand dollars, and then we built the house on that property on that land for about two hundred and sixty five thousand dollars in total. So all up, around four hundred and seventy was the total spent.
Okay, not bad for coastal living. That sounds quite nice.
We're quite lucky.
Yeah, when you guys were looking. What were your list of non negotiables.
We knew we wanted to be on a decent sized block. We didn't want to be on a really tiny block where the houses are touching the roofs, sort of the next door neighbor. In terms of the size of the house, we knew we wanted two living spaces. We love watching different shows and all those sorts of things, so we didn't want to have to be in the one living space all.
The time, fighting over who's putting it on the TV.
Absolutely, yeah, So we wanted to make sure we had two living spaces. We wanted a double garage, We wanted expare bedrooms for whatever we needed them for. And I really wanted a nice big kitchen that was going to be that central living point when people come over at the house and just as I say, the heart of the home.
Yeah, to cook love it. Yeah, Oh that's so fun. Were you looking specifically at that coastal area? Were you from that area or what made you choose I suppose that location.
Yeah, so my partner at the time was from that area. I grew up about fifteen minutes down the road a neighboring suburbs, so not too far, and it was just a really beautiful location, lots of friends and family around their really popular holiday destination, and we could just see ourselves at the time living there long.
Term, yeah, and being really happy. Did you guys use any government schemes or grants to kind of help you along the way with that purchase?
We did, so.
We utilized the first home owners grant at the time, which was the twenty thousand dollars. Obviously as a couple, we only got to utilize that once. Yes, and we also had our stamp duty refunded, so that was about ten thousand dollars that came back to us post settlement of the property, so that really helped us along the way as well.
Really good to get you in, but frustrating, as you pointed out, that you can only use it once and then obviously you've used it in a joint venture, which means that now unfortunately, if you were to go off and do it by yourself, you don't have the chance to use it again, which is I can see how that would be really frustrating. But it's awesome that you were able to use that to get in, you know when you did, and it sounds like it's gone pretty well for you in terms of the profit, so that's really really fun looking back. Is there anything about your journey that you would want to change.
I think it's a hard one to ask.
It's a tough question, it really is.
Yeah, it's very tough.
I think at the time it was exactly what I wanted, and it was exactly what we wanted as a couple. I would probably reconsider probably more material things at the home in terms of really capitalizing on its value and the potential of the location, things like that. But in terms of the whole journey, I think we were very lucky to be able to enter the first enter the market as the first homeowners when we did, quite young in our early twenties at the time, and I mean, hindsight's a wonderful thing with our relationship obviously not working out, but I think it was the right thing at the right time, and it's provided so many learning opportunities, both financially and just personally as well in terms of what's important and you know, what matters to us and our values and things.
So it's probably not a very good answer, No, it's.
About back at the answer. You can't, I guess The summary of what you're saying, and the summary of what people often say to me, is that you are where you are because of what happened. And you know you didn't enter into this expecting things to go badly. I don't think anybody ever does. You wouldn't take on such a big obligation like buying a house if you thought things were going to go south. And it's awful and sad that they did. However, you know you were doing the best you could with the information and the resources that you had then, and I think that that's a really great thing. And the fact that you think that you've learned from it and hopefully that will be able to propel you on your journey now is just really really great. Yes, one agree, Let's go to a really quick break, because when we come back, I want to talk to you a little bit more about how this whole situation has panned out. Don't go anywhere, guys, Welcome back everybody. Today we're chatting to a property diarist who purchased with a partner and is now trying to sell her half back to her ex, which just sounds like a very sticky situation. I get the tone from your original letter that it's not the most amicable of breakups. Would that be right?
Yeah, that's correct. It's been definitely a hairy situation. It's had plenty of ups and downs. You're along the way. There's been moments of amicable decisions, and then there's been moments of not being able to agree on anything at all. But I think where it's heading at the moment is definitely for the best, and we all live and learn from our mistakes are now experiences, and I'm really excited for what's to come next once we settle in the next couple of days.
Oh, I'm so excited. That's so close, in the next couple of days. How crazy. How long has the process been, kind of negotiating, going back and forth, figuring things out.
It's been about eighteen months now, Yeah, far too long since we separated and I moved out of the property. Yeah, it's been close to eighteen months of trying to get this settled and still having that financial attachment has been really hard as well.
Yeah. Well, because for most people, I think a breakup is obviously emotionally very taxing at the best of times, even if it's a very amical, very easy, very straightforward breakup. But then obviously with this you're having to go back and forth. As you're said, you're having maybe disagreements here and there, and I can imagine sometimes you just want to be like, okay, I never want to look at you again, Like I'm just I want to be done. I want to cut the cord. I want to I just want to move on with my life. But selling a property can be a really calm, complex endeavor as well. Obviously the market's been really crazy here in Victoria. It's been all over the shop, so I don't know how easy that sales process was for you. I want to know how he's living in the property, so logistically, how is that working? Is he covering? Is he paying rent? I suppose to be staying there or are you guys still splitting the mortgage fifty to fifty?
Yeah, so when I moved out, there was an agreement that he wanted to stay there. I chose to leave the property before all we had settled, and so he has just taken over those payments. So I do still keep an eye on them on the online banking app to ensure they're being paid.
Of course, my.
Credit history is at risk there if it wasn't to be paid.
Very clever of you to think about that.
Yeah, I guess it's when there's a bit of a hostility in the situation. I suppose you just need to consider all avenues. And obviously his credit history is at risk as well, so he's not done anything wrong in that regard. But I've just been keeping a close eye on it, and he's continued to make the repayments. Whereas previously we were paying fifty to fifty when we lived together.
Yeah, did you both contribute equally to your deposit and your expenses along the way?
Initially my partner at the time had a slightly bigger deposit than me. I had at the time just returned from traveling overseas, so naturally spent a lot of my savings on that trip. When we went into the property, probably bit earlier than we expected. I think he contributed about thirty thousand dollars more than me. But from that moment we contributed fifty to fifty for absolutely everything.
Yeah, okay, And now with the sale of this house, how are you approaching that? Are you going we just split it directly down the middle? Are you accounting for that extra money? That he contributed at the start, Did you have any agreement in place around this or did you kind of just go, oh, we're so excited to get into our first property. We'll figure it out. Obviously love blinkers around and not thinking it's going to go badly.
Yeah.
So back in twenty eighteen, when we first went into this plan, prior to building, I always had said that if we were able to separate, that I would happily let him have that difference back or extra I suppose in terms of a settlement. So by all means, I've kept my word, and I'm maintaining that he is entitled to his money back that he put in above what I did. Coming to an agreement on how to actually settle the property has been the most challenging thing, which is where the legal fees have come into this. The most challenging thing to begin with was deciding or agreeing I should say, on an agreed value of the property. So at the time we had a number of local real estate agents inspect the property with the idea of obviously finding out what they would think it should sell for where we should be listing it for, say a at and if he was to buy me out, what would be be looking at in terms of that equity of the property other than that thirty thousand dollars. It was about looking at fifty to fifty of the equity. So the challenging part I guess that's followed since then was the property was valued by the agents, which I should highlight is not a form of property valuation, it's just the appraisal. But the local agents were quite adamant that the property should be listed at nine hundred and fifty thousand dollars, which is well and truly more than double the current mortgage or four hundred thousand dollars.
Yeah, that's a huge jump in not that long of a time either, in what four years correct?
Yeah?
Four years, And so that made the buyout figure of fifty percent of that equity far too unachievable for him in trying to negotiate between selling the property and maybe trying to negotiate a buyout offer, I guess there's been lots of complicated factors, but I've accepted a much lower buyout in the interest of getting this over and with So I suppose there's no other better way to say it than get it over and done. With so in terms of coming to a greed amount, we've agreed on the property being listed as all valued as eight hundred thousand dollars, which is far below what the market value is.
Yeah wow, Yeah, So theoretically seventy five thousand dollars less of what you were entitled to, which is a huge amount of money.
Huge amount of money. And I mean there was a lot of factors that came into that decision. It was about the interest of I guess the market was quite slow at the time. So over the past twelve months, particularly where we're located, the market has certainly slowed down. I wouldn't say that it's dropped, but you know, interest rate rises obviously having an impact on that, and just inflation and general cost of living things impacting everyone. And at the end of the day, it's discussing me more in legal fees to discuss this matter and to try and fight over it. So I was willing to just sort of cut my losses, I suppose, and be still really grateful for the amount that I'd be walking away with.
You're not out of pocket, which is a win.
I'm certainly not out of pocket, and I'm in a really lucky position where it's still worked out for the best. I can wholeheartedly say that, but yeah.
It's a challenging situation. Still, I don't think anyone would very easily say, oh, I'm happy to give up seventy five grand, like that's a huge amount of money to walk away from, regardless of what situation or how or why. What is the reasoning I suppose for? In my mind, the logic I guess would be, Okay, well, he can't afford to pay out the agreed value or the market value. But in my mind, I guess the next logical step would be to go, okay, well, if neither of us can afford that buyout, let's just sell it and split the money. So what's happening there? Is it that he's really adamant that he wants to remain in the property.
Yeah, that's right.
So we actually did put the house on the market. Oh really, Yeah, we did get to that point where he was not able to accept I guess that value in terms of a buyout. So we did put the house on the market. It lasted on the market for about a week until he came back to me and said, no, I can actually come to this amount, like this is going to you know, get this, I suppose wrapped up. My parents are going to help me and whatever else he had planned financially and in the interest of keeping the peace and getting things moving along after such a long, drawn out, really difficult experience, I was just so ready to move on, and so I accepted his much lower buyout figure. However, that was now over six months ago, and it's still not resolved completely.
And what's the delay there? Like, what's now holding it up? Because obviously, if you'd taken it to market, sold it to a buyer, you'd have your regular settlement date of however many days that the buyer and yourself agreed to, and then you'd be kind of like, okay, great, bingo, bango, thank you, we're all done. Whereas here it's obviously a bit more complex. But it sounds like you came to the place where you agreed on the value. You're like, okay, great, Like you've compromised. You've come to the table to meet him at the price that he can afford. So what has now I suppose postponed that sale so long.
So I guess where we're at today is that settlement is booked in to occur in the next couple of days, which is really great. But leading up to this week, it had just been us opposed, the hostility between us, and just the tension in coming to an agreement. There's obviously a house full of furniture and joint belongings that were purchased.
Equally, I hadn't even thought about that.
Yeah, so building a brand new house, we obviously furnish it from scratch.
As first homeowners.
Basically for years we just worked and saved and bought everything brand new outright as we could afford it. And then you've got the you know, the assets there as well, You've got cash savings that you're kind of arguing over. There's just so many factors. So I guess in terms of what's delated, it's more just been finalizing the ins and outs. It's been communicating through lawyers. It's been just trying to get things sorted amongst the rest of our daily lives as well. I mean, it's it's worth noting that working full time life's busy enough rather than trying to get all this stuff sorted as well. And so yeah, just I expose coming to that agreement and actually waiting for things to go through court. We did have to get consent orders, which is I suppose more financially binding than an agreement, but it's where we had a magistrate to prove the orders of what was to occur and put a date on there. And there's just yes, so many factors.
Yeah, it sounds incredibly complex. I can't imagine juggling that alongside just the normal demands of living a life, as you said, working a job, doing the things that you have to do every day, and then dealing with this huge, emotionally draining situation on the side. Are you okay? Is your mental health doing all right? Because I can't, I honestly can't fathom dealing with all of that, and then I guess the stress of giving up the extra money and the challenges that then also just come with going through a breakup, which is never fun at the best of times.
Yeah, thank you for asking. No, I'm doing really good.
Thank you.
It's obviously been really challenging eighteen months or more and it continues to really test me. But I'm doing really good. I mean a really good place. I'm really well supported by friends, family, colleagues, and I'm just really happy with where my life is ash and know that I've made the right decisions. So yeah, as hard as it is, I know that there's light end of the tunnel, and I'm really excited for what's to come next. As I said in my letter, there's a large profit coming my way, and I'm really excited to set myself up financially now for the future.
I'm so excited for you. Talk to me about that future. What's next for you on your journey? Do you plan on buying property again by yourself? Do you plan on renting? Do you want to just sit on it for a little bit, because obviously coming into a huge sum of money is a little bit overwhelming, I would imagine when it's such a big amount, especially based off of what you originally paid.
Yes, absolutely, I've been over this so many times. What I'm going to do with it? My first thought was to see a financial advisor to get proper advice.
Love it.
But the first thing I'm.
Doing is, I mean the process of buying a house at the moment, Oh my gosh, congratulations, thank you so not putting down the entire profit, but I would say probably sixty percent of it is going into a property. So I've got a unit under contract at the moment, which is obviously subject to my finance going through the next couple of days, so that's just all about to go through. My plan is though it does have tenants in there, so I'll continue to rent it out to them until I feel ready to live in them myself. In the meantime, I planning on renting with my boyfriend. I have got a new partner, so just sort of lots of new things to consider in terms of finances. Obviously my decisions have they're going to affect me, but also our future plans and trying to protect myself for the future as well. Once the unit is purchased and all goes through, I am going to see a financial advisor to get some advice in terms of setting up I guess my investment portfolio and whether I look at my superannuation and other sort of areas where I might be able to put a nice little buffer of money just to sort of get me on the right track. I want to also ensure that I have a really good emergency fund left over. I don't want to spend it all. I don't want to see it just disappear. I just want to see a bit of it as a backup, and I suppose as an investment property, you need to have that emergency funding as well in case, you know, you never know if they help, water system might break or something like that that you're going to be responsible for. And I'm going to go on a really big holiday homesee, he's going to get some travel done at the end.
Of the year.
I think you deserve it.
I think so too.
Well earned and well deserved. How do you feel about being a landlord? That's exciting, that's a new adventure.
Y, it's a bit weird. Well, you've never even rented before.
You've never rented, Oh my goodness.
Never rented.
Very lucky to live with my parents while we saved to build, and obviously my parents had rented in the past, but I haven't. My partner at the moment rents, and so even that's a bit of a weird concept for me. I guess it's just the privilege of the position I've been in where I've not rented a property before. But I am looking forward to I guess just knowing that I have my own place that's there for me to move into when I'm ready. Whether that's with my partner or not. I think it's a bit of an ick feeling knowing the cost of my mortgage or payments are not going to be covered by their rent. But I'm also very mindful of putting their rent up. I know the stress that people are under to make ends meet as it is, so I know that I'm going to be contributing a little bit out of pocket myself each week. But I'm really excited to just know that I'm going to have a place of my own that's going to be mine forever. It's really essential to the CBD. It's just perfect for what I am looking for, whether it's now laid down the track, and I just I really hope I can hold onto this property for the long term.
That's very kind. I think your tenants will really appreciate that you're being considered of their situation, as well as obviously the financial position that you'll be in with the new mortgage. The one last thing I wanted to kind of ask you about is obviously you've now seen how things cannot work out and how difficult it can be, no matter what kind of rose color glasses or what kind of hopes you have when you enter into something with a partner and you now are in a wonderful new relationship, what steps, if any, have you taken to protect yourself Because obviously this asset that you've bought, this unit, it's all yours, and that's amazing. But obviously you know, depending on what your future holds, if you became de facto or anything like that, there's a little extra layer of complexity. So have you thought about that at all?
Yeah?
Absolutely have So.
The lawyer that's been assisting me with the settlement and the other sort of matters regarding my property with my ex partner and I have been speaking about this and given it such a large sum of money that I'll be technically, in the legal terms bringing into the relationship compared to what my partner has. I am in the process of getting a financial agreement drawn up. My partner is very understanding and respectful that, as much as obviously hopes will never be needed, he knows that based on the experience I've had the past eighty months, two or so years even longer, that I just I need this to be mine and mine only, and not nothing that I can lose in the future. I guess that's the first thing I want to do is just make sure that property can't be I suppose take him from me or sold or you know him take over half of it or anything like that.
And then in terms.
Of our other finances, I'm just really mindful of keeping our finances separate, ensuring we pay for things equally, ensuring we still have our own decision making around our finances and our goals.
We certainly do things together.
And have goals together, like our overseas trip, but we just we're keeping our finances separate for now and just really being mindful. As much as we're a partnership, it's still early days for me and I need to protect myself in that way.
I totally understand. I've been with my partner for almost seven years and we operate our finances almost completely independently, and I'm hoping to buy a house by myself, and I had to have that same conversation that you did around saying, hey, like, it's not about you, it's just if I do this. I've worked really hard for it and that's important to me. So I totally understand where you're coming from with that, And it's actually funny say that we had a community member right Intoshes and the money very recently and ask about how to have that kind of a conversation with their partner and how to bring it up, because it can be a little bit, I guess, confronting, especially if your partner wasn't expecting it to turn around to say, hey, by the way, I want you to sign a legal document, and it can make people feel a bit on edge or like they're not trusted. How did you bring it up? What did that conversation go, Like, was it ongoing or did you go out to dinner one night and kind of ease him into it.
Yeah, it's definitely a hard thing to bring up. I think i'd been sort of talking about from the beginning with my partner that I was going through this still kind of messy separation and trying to get the properties settled, and that I guess I never want to go through it ever again. And he kind of knew that from the start, so he's been really understanding. I think I just dropped it in conversation one day when I was starting to look at properties to buy again, and I think form a memory, I just said to him, like, you know, I want a financial agreement here. This is going to be my property and no one's going to take this from me. And yeah, he's been surprisingly really understanding. Of course, as you said, it's that I guess, that question of not being trusted and what not, but he also can see what I've been through and how messy it can get, and yeah, he completely respects my wishes in that department.
That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you that you found a partner who's supportive and it sounds like you're absolutely on your way to thriving. Before we head off, property, diarist, is there any last thoughts or anything that you want to share with the people listening at home.
I think my advice would be that your happiness is worth so much more than a house, and coming from that place of fear of not wanting to leave a relationship where you're financially set up and you've got the house and you've got everything that seems perfect from the outside in, there is light on the other side. There is hope at the end, and you know there is light at the end of the tunnel. The bricks and mortar of a house should not keep you in a relationship that you're not happy in There's so many more houses out there. You know, it's so worth your happiness to leave those places that no longer serve you. And you shouldn't be held back by the fear of, you know, not being able to buy a house again, or not being able to set yourself up, because your happiness is worth so much more than the bricks and mortar.
One hundred percent. You deserve to be happy. And you know, you're a perfect example of how things don't go the way that you thought, but they can change and you can come out the other side and it can all work out for the better. So I think that's the perfect place to leave it.
Thank you so much.
Well, guys, I think that's about all we have time for today. If you liked this episode, leave us a little review. I'm working really hard. I'm doing my best. Give me some love. If you want to talk more property, We've got the Facebook group as well as in Instagram, where people are sharing tips and tricks every single day. It's such a wholesome, supportive place to hang out. You can find us on either platform by searching Property Playbook aus. Let's quickly wrap the boring but important stuff. The advice shared on the Property Playbook is generally in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. The Property Playbook exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or a financial decision. And that's about it for today, so thank you for tuning in and see you next week. Bye guys.
MHM.
