Taylor McGraw is back by popular demand and she has more than crime under her belt. Nikki hits the pod bingo card and goes off about Taylor Swift's new song and something they have in common. They talk about the cast of The Ultimatum: Queer Love and lesbian sex habits. Nikki gives a little recap of Brian Frange's wedding and a teaser about what he will share when he returns from his honeymoon. Nikki and Taylor have a huge night ahead: they are going to see Matchbox 20. Nikki shares the DM she sent Rob Thomas before the girls all gush about him. Nikki and Taylor explain what a Duhnuh is. They all share when they know a relationship is over. Anya has been dubbed General Genital and asks a question pertaining to that area. Nikki doesn't understand why more kids don't drown in public pools and Taylor has her own string theory. In the Final Thought they find our who would rather be in bed with a spider, snake or rat.
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The nick A Gliser Podcast. Glaser's Nikki. Hello, it's me, It's Nicky. I'm Nikki. It's Nicky Glaser Podcast. Welcome to the show. Forgot what I said the show and I don't want to do it again. Welcome to the show. I'm so excited for the show today. Brian is still away. Brian frangie is. He got married this past weekend. We'll talk about that. He's not on the show because this is like kind of his post wedding hard week off. Yeah, postpartum week off, and so in not in his place, but just here with us today in studio in Saint Louis with me is backed by popular demand. Taylor mcraw hey, Yeah, train Jumpin' klepto have other qualities besides crime, but are fascinated in John Benney, like leading expert in John Benet probably with one hundred radio insects.
Oh yeah, screen replacing thrift shopping.
Screen, car painting. Yeah, and what you have a degree too? Though you actually like things that you could say after your name. Besides, these things were just like attributing to you. What do you what?
What?
What's your degree in?
I'm an m A. I could be Taylor McGrath a guess in what psychology?
But what's an A stand for arts?
Let me CV, like, Taylor, tell me how close I am. Taylor McGrath has worked in emergency rooms, working with high risk patients who have experienced a schizophrenia and serious mental illness.
Yeah.
Sure, that's great.
That's really good. And I like the worst use of CV. That's very European.
Oh, I don't even know it is.
Isn't that?
Is that really it? It's like you're it's a resume, correct CV, It's more the same thing.
Yeah, basically it's more bullet point I think.
Okay, and I call it a resume.
She's also a writer and illustrator.
You have so many facets. I'm fast sitting there facets to I actually thought of you today because on the street it says never wait, never stop improving on these signs that are like construction signs for the hospital near me and Taylor one day was like you could read that has never stopped improving, Like they're always just like a freewheeling it in there, like what.
Are we going to do this time?
Yes, anding each other by the way I want, I want, stated a guy Nikki knows what I'm talking about who seems like he just learned the phrase yes ending, And if you don't know what that is, it's just what they do. And improv where someone suggests you need to.
Start improving if you don't.
Someone like suggests an idea, and the good improv actor or sketch person will say yes and to that, meaning they won't like poo poo the idea and switch the track or like the subject.
You should always be like to keep the flow going. Do you know that about improv?
Yeah, but that's also therapists.
Yes.
If someone's like, so I want to kill my brother?
Are butts ever good?
How about your mom?
Okay?
So?
And then so the guy what about this guy?
He just would use this phrase constantly and he was kind of he would always use it in a metaphor. He'd be like, I was at this Broadway show and it was just so wonderful to meet all these people there because.
Everyone like you, guys, can probably figure out who this is from her impression. It's someone you would recognize by their voice. Wait say it again, do it again?
Be like, you know, with a sign of a good friend to someone who's yes ending a lot you know, and I'm like, you're using this phrase constantly, like you should not be using yes and thrice.
It's like when everyone learned the word wheelhouse and everyone started using too much a rapping.
I wear many hats.
I really think of them as wearing. You say that if you wear lots ofs, and then if you do, I don't normally know you. If you're cop hat fighter Stenson, I wear any It's really grosses me out. But actual hat joke that I made in a SETH Meyers late night said that Taylor Swift actually put in a song. So she has this new song, which one is it? I cried over a hat? Oh yeah, okay, so it's in the the new song. Uh, I think it's your losing me. No, it's what's the It hits different. Okay, so when the bridge it hits different. She goes. I find the artifacts, cried over a hat. Curse the space that I needed, but cried over a hat. I did a joke that I was like, when you're going through a breakup, you'll cry about any You'll cry at the drop of a hat. You'll be like, you wore hats, and I'd chase a hat down the Street, and I was like, that's kind of the same thing, Like, was she maybe going for the because she's talking about a breakup. I find the artifacts cried over a hat.
I don't know if she if she did that many, but it made.
Me excited that I was on the same path. I mean, I guess she just is meaning that I find the artifacts, oh, like of her relationship. And she finds an old hate Penie.
Definitely skater Seattle skater boy.
She finds a beretank. God, he's gone.
Thank god you broke up with that one Beret guy Nikki pl So Taylor and I.
I was trying to explain the new show that Anya and I are watching to you with Ultimatum. I really think besties need to get board with it. It's queer ultimatum and it's all women or I guess none of them are non binary. I think there was one girl where they were tossing around them for a bit, but then they went to she and then it was like, no problem. So I don't know, you caught that too, Yeah, So I think they all identify as what women, who gives a shit? It's just it's queer ultimatum, not who gives a shit, like I don't care what you go as, but who gives a shit for me telling you that? Okay, So queer ultimatum is awesome because ultimatum, if you don't know, it's all these couples where one person is like, I want to get married and the other person is like, I like how things are the other person does. It's not like a couple that wants to break up. They both are happy with the relationship, but one is happy with the status quo and one is like, I need to get married or I'm done. So it's an ultimatum. And then they all get put in a mix. So it's five couples that all get thrown in together and they all meet each other and the gist is and they all sign up for this. They break up in quotes, and then they all go live with another person they choose after they mingle over like overkit choose them.
Yeah.
Yeah, So they meet and they all date each other.
But if nobody chooses someone, they just stick the last few with who.
You can tell that. Producers are just like, well you guys, just like try, but it ends up everyone kind of agrees on it, like people gravitate towards and they all gravitate because it's a queer edition, they all gravitate towards each other's partner. So they're like mostly swapping because it's like the same kind of person or the same kind of dynamic. One person doesn't want to get married, the other person does. One person's avoidant, one person is secure, or one person is what's the opposite of avoidant.
Securely, attached, anxious?
Anxious. Yes, so there's that, Ma, and so so gonna help to help me out, mama, because there's a lot of that going on in here. So then they all picked different partners and they live together for three weeks with this new partner, and they don't talk to their exes at all. They are completely like doing this experiment of like just and they called a trial wife like they're acting like they're married, which is a new kind of concept. There was an ultimatum that wasn't queer, that already happened, and I was telling Taylor. The biggest difference, and this isn't spoiler, is that no one be fucking no, no, none of these women some of them, I'm not saying who, but some will go the entire time of those three weeks sleeping in the same bed together, calling each other trial wife and won't even hold hands or kiss, And I go, what are we doing here? Like this isn't But I thought, yeah, what episode are you on?
Yeah, dude, they don't have fun in the dark.
And there's one couple, one couple.
That's the game is on the blonde with the huge bazoon.
Yes, and there's so much better than that, but I can't think of a single thing. And now, yes, she's twenty four blonde with the huge moves and twenty.
Four right together and start like cuddling the film.
No, but there we don't see any kissing from them.
I can you imagine doing that break up with the Chris why you're in bed with how j okay?
But I'm telling I understand. The next night, I give these in the in the ultimatum, the first version with Strad's they were kissing by the end of the first week. I mean, it takes a little time, so I'm not asking these people to jump right into things. But the whole three weeks, I don't really care anymore about the show. If you're not gonna attempt to like kiss and get with someone else, that's what makes this interesting. But it turns out, which the ultimatum did not tell us is that they all agreed with each other before they broke up that they wouldn't do anything physical with each other. Yeah, now this is such a woman thing. I really. I told Chris, I was like, the reason this is happening, And I was like, is because they're women and they can't stand it's like this. I think there's something to that because most of my female friends couldn't imagine their partner being with someone else, and so I think and most men are territorial as well. So I don't know why this, Why is this happening on this show? More than and the only people that hook up betray that promise, by the.
Way, right, So there is a spoiler here, and if you got here, here's a belated No.
There's no spoiler. You're not gonna know, you're not gonna know who did it.
Okay, but you're if you're watching on F one hoping that somebody fucking on F two you just found out they're not.
Well, no, no one's watching it to see if they fuck. I'm just telling so, yes, that's the spoiler. Well, I guess what you should be mad about it then too, aren't they fucking well? Did you notice this as well, that no one is being intimate until like the last second where it's like, come.
On, I just assumed they were. I had a different response. I was like, these fucking hard they weren't showing it to spooning on like the afternoon of breaking up with someone.
You don't think a reality show if they had footage of these two kissing, would show it. You think they're sitting on that footage but then we gotta watch. But instead they're choosing her going out to with a friend she hasn't seen in four years, who's like, oh you look happy and differently those scenes, I could fucking throw them in the trash. Let's get some action in here, even if it's just a hand holding. I want to see anything. So in my mind, Anya, they're not not showing us things because if they had it as a reality show producer, they would show it or fake it.
Yeah, I thought they were being like polite or like having a little resk no.
What, but they're definitely again respecting anyone's boundaries.
Don't you think that they told them how they need to do that.
We're show watch No No, And what I do know is that they purposefully hold withhold that information from us as a viewer, that they all promise each other, because that comes out later on and you go, well, what the fuck am I watching this for? I would never watch a show where everyone agrees to not get physical with the other person they're supposed to go be physical with. That's the premise of the fucking show.
It's about consent, and I didn't consent to see boring TV.
Thank you a question.
It is good.
So when I talk to like my male guy friends and they tell me about their hookups and stuff, and they can just go to like a like a day spa and jerk a guy off and stuff like that and then it's over and you know, like and then less emotion involved. Yeah, there's absolutely no emotion. It's just kind of like or yes, yeah, it's just like for fun. You have a need, I have a need, let's let's get it done.
I'm not saying that's all gay sex. We're not generalized, not at all. I don't want to make a serios with the gay sexual experience. I've found and have heard is that they can do it without any emotion. Or like, is he gonna call attached to it?
Yeah, it's it's like a completely and I'm fascinated by it. That's why I love to hear stories because I cannot relate to it at all. I know I wouldn't be able to do something like that. So do you think I mean I I don't. I don't have any lesbian friends actually, so I do you think that it's kind of similar to us, where like it takes us forever to like hook up with the guy, and there's all those nerves too.
That's a really good point, is that there's they need to build that emotional connection before the physical can happen. And I just thought there would be because there are so many Well you've been in a relationship with a non binary person, Taylor, mm hmmm. Do you find I found or I thought because some of these women present more masculinely and I've been around lesbians who hit on me hardcore, and it feels exactly like a man who just wants to get his dick sucked hitting on me, you know, like the same kind of like I just want sex kind of thing. I thought we would have more of that from some of the more masculine energy women.
Yeah, I was surprised about that. I would think that the lesbians would be hooking up way more than the straight people.
Or falling like fast quick yeah you all lesbians? Yeah yeah, but it's it's just it's good though, because in the original, the one with all the straits, you only got to choose the other they can choose. There's a bigger pool to choose from because it's all women as opposed to half being the sex you're not attracted to. So it's just better and it's just interesting and uh, you just get to watch relationship dynamics and judge other people for things you do in your own relationship, and it brings up good conversations when you're watching it with your partner and and you see like manipulation happened, or certain people will remind me of you, of people you've dated. Good one.
And I was I was wondering what you thought of the villain character, Nikki. Do you did you emize?
I think she talks with her teeth like in an amazing way where it's almost like that's how I'm supposed to be singing. Is every time that you open your mouth, it goes all the way open this and.
How I'm doing my vocal exercise is supposed to a little more yes, because it's strong.
She looks like Natalie Portman. She's gorgeous. She's one of the most stunning people. I think she's one of she's just like the type of She's the girl that I had a crush on my freshman year. Cat and I both had a crush on this girl in her our freshman year. It was the first time we ever felt like a little gay and we couldn't help it. I was like, I think I'm in Her name is Marissa, yes, and she's like a volleyball player, but she looked like Vanessa and I was like, I'm thinking about Marissa a lot. I think I like love her, and Kat was like, she's so hot, and we were both like I don't know if I wanted to be her or be inside her, but uh, but anyway, she looked like this Vanessa girl. But my take on Vanessa is but she's like fun and at first she's like the most fun and the most funky and everyone's just like delighted by her. And she's just like, let me ask you a crazy question, like if you were in ice cream topping. What would you be like? She just is like and she asked a lot of questions that she wants to answer, right, that's like her thing, and someone even calls her on it.
And everything always comes back to her. But I'm beautiful. Let's talk about my beauty.
I like her and I'm sorry I like her and it's just she hook up so bad. No, I mean no, no, that isn't that fast. That was like two weeks in? Was it?
Okay? Yes, but she's she goes the farthest I.
Think, no, she does not.
Yes, their whole the P word comes up, penetration all because.
Of the c Yeah, but you don't think Xander and oh yeah, a fucking wait can you even Askander? She goes, did you mouths? Did you use? Because lesbians called sex fingering by the way, I didn't know that.
I didn't know that.
Do your whole sound? Yeah? Yeah, this girl fingers another girl not saying who, and they're all like they had sex, and I'm like, what, Like I thought sex was like, you know, a lot more things have to happen than a light fingering. So you can have sex at the movie theater if you're a lesbian.
You could go down on him and ye, but.
Like fingering someone lately? Do you think the lesbian community considers that sex?
Yeah, because they don't have a penis and that is their prerequisite for calling it sex for heateros.
So are they thinking that heteros when we finger each other is sex too? Does that?
How they that's all they got me.
Let's say I was in a relationship with a woman and then I got fingered by a guy and she's like, you had sex with them, and I'm like, uh no, I didn't. But according to I.
Don't think they would say that.
But then that's not fun. That's not fair then, because I sometimes I don't want to have have it mean sex with someone. So if I was dating a woman and she fingered me, I would not want her to think she had sex with me.
Well, I think it's more like you're also like humping and you can do it at the same time.
If you're naked and like doing that.
And I don't think it's just that I would think they would call this sex. They would.
That's what they did. That's what they did the whole.
Time on this show, I mean, actually on it all that.
Yeah, Yeah, I think her relationships. I don't think either of them are ready to become gay against I can't do that. Yeah, But then one was like she was like we hooked up and they're like, did you do mouth stuff? Because her mouth's always open, but she was like very wanting to know about mouth and then Xander's like, uh, I don't want to answer that, and it was pretty much like I'll tell you when we're not on camera. Okay, but guess what if someone dodges a question about mouth stuff, it gets a mouth stuff.
Yeah that's a yah, yeah mouthy.
What I found so interesting is that a lot of the ones that are that seem the most needy at first in episode one, the most hardcore ready for marriage. They're the ones that flip the fastest and all of a sudden want to marry someone new.
Because then they meet someone who actually is available to them and is not avoidant. So the ones that suddenly the ones that are constantly wanting to get married to this person that's avoidant, they they are forced to do this experiment because the other person they're in a relationship really wants to fuck someone else. Really, they're all kind of reluctantly like I guess I'll do this, but like, I love you, you know, I want to get married to you. And then they are forced to then go be in a relationship with someone else, and some of them end up with secure people or also like more anxious people, so then they find someone who's actually wanting what they want, which is like this thing that they but they wouldn't be with them otherwise unless they were forced by this show, because you know, yeah, they would choose the copy a carbon copy of and some of them do choose like the same kind of person in their last partner, but yeah, that is.
Are there any women you absolutely could not date on that show, like any personalities that you're like, oh.
Yes, Ti, yes, wait Tiff and her fucking dog. We'll get to that after the break. One second. We'll be right back. Okay, we're back. So sorry to talk about the Ultimatum show you probably haven't seen, but there is one girl in there who's like, if you don't like my dog, then sorry, fuck you, you're out, And I'm like, your dog is a husky, it's twelve, it's gonna be dead in like three minutes, so you should probably have a plan for love after this. It is those dogs don't live that long. The dog is well, she's like aggressive, like it really is.
She also husky.
Yeah, she gets mad at this really sweet woman she's living with who's just like she's like, I just feel like you like don't even like my dog like you have it. And she's like, I love animals, like I am a gentle kind person.
Yeah, well you know what, I sleep with my dog. And if you're not into the dog in the bed, you can fuck right off.
Is what I just realized. I feel like I've been making so many compromises and there's been none from you. I didn't say I didn't like the dog.
I'm done.
And then there's Aussie who's like, oh, there's this one woman and her her girlfriend's like we need to like talk. Every time she wants to confront her about something. She like is like, I can't have this conversation right now. I can't do it. I can't do it. I'm just I'm just not not going to have this conversation with you right now, and the ones like when can we and she's like, I need to meditate first, I need to be in Why I had this conversation I.
Related because it was a spicy Latine. It was like, you don't like my fucking talk, We're gonna talk now, And Ozzie's.
Like, yeah, not with this tone.
I'm afraid I'm gonna go outside and walk the dog for the third time.
With the first time, the tone was a little much. But this girl eventually just wants to have a conversation and it's guess what, It's gonna be a little heated because it's about they're criticizing each other, you know, So it's gonna so Aussie literally goes.
Her name is Aussie.
Yeah.
She's like, I'm not running. Why I'm not running away? And she's putting on running shi. She's like, I'm leaving, but I'm not running why She's like lacing up these nikes is so funny. But then and then she like, so we're spoiling this whole thing. But anyway, it's a fascinating little trip into lesbian culture that I quite enjoy. And then so uh, other things I want to talk about. Went to Brian Francie's wedding. We'll do a better recap on that when he is here. But it was so pretty and lovely. We went out to Colorado Grand Lake. You have to Land, Denver and then drive like two and a half hours up to this beautiful little town, so picturesque, so mountainous, and it like hailed minutes before his ceremony, So it was like insane that like we all and you just walk from your cabin to the little nuptial knoll, which I was like, that was the only knoll I've heard of besides the grassy one.
There's another null.
Yeah, there's one other noose, the nuptial nol. It's like, yeah, that's probably where the ultimatum, like they do the final elimination rounds the nuptialnal. So yeah, it was so beautiful and it like was crazy weather right before the ceremony and then the sun came out and it was beautiful and Brian was His vows were so funny. He has a copy of them. He's going to read them for us when he comes back next week. He'll be back on the show next Wednesday.
So I haven't even started them.
He wrote his in the morning. The thing is the bar is so low. I'm not saying Brian were funny, but they were just and no, it wasn't about the yes he is, but it wasn't about the writing. It was just he was just honest, you know, like you know what Brian is. He just like the way he talks is funny, and it was. It was a grouping of everyone who knows and loves Brian, and Brian is a interesting character. He had like twelve close personal friends from high school there, all of their wives. Everyone's like no, Brian has like a cast, a wide net of friends. It was really fun. Adam Conover was there from Adam Ruins. Everything amazing reception with great dancing. Some critiques there, but well not about his dancing, but about the music. We'll get into that.
Brian a good dancer.
I heard a little bit.
Taylor Swiws song finally came on and Brian came out to me and I'll just say this. He just goes, is this acceptable? And I said absolutely not. And that's that's where I'll leave that, because it was just the way it was so but it was so funny that it wasn't. It was better than if it would have been good. But otherwise we I mean, we had so much fun dancing and just seeing Brian so happy. But his his vows were incredible, her vows were incredible. And then the speeches were really really funny as well, and Brian apparently didn't get any sleep before his wedding day, did not sleep one wink throughout the whole night, which I think he put on the Instagram. That's where I saw that exact stat because he was so One of the reasons was he was so nervous about his best man's speech. Who he ended up the best man. I'll just say the last light of the best man's speech, he said something he's just like giving him shit the whole time, and he goes and and like Ali loves you. Brian, despite being this and this and also being on strike from a job you don't have. That was so funny. So shout out to Adam I think his last name's uh Steinman, Adam Steinman who does it? And Long Island and long on Long Beach, Long Beach, Long Island, is that a place? Very funny guy and had one of the funniest speeches even though he was up against comedians on it. And then yeah it was it was a great time. Favorite part, uh watch watching Brian walk down the aisle like you know you like I know, mental walking.
Was he wearing his Cota Pacsi No, he.
Wore it at every other thing, and yes, he did wear it at the reception right away. He just wanted to be comfortable. And he was also wearing his fanning pack the night before, like the intro dinner, was that your favorite part? Because he looked so happy. I was just like, I started crying as soon as I saw him, because I guess he's someone that I don't see like a lot of what I do. What you're saying, he's not emotional, and I'm like, no, I see an emotion from him all the time. I don't know. I was just so happy for him, I think, and then you just like hearing there he was so you well, we'll talk about it. The reason is all locked inside his vows because the way he started his vows, the way he kind of talks us through his life before he met Ali, and then what Ali brought to his life. And he said one thing that really was so sweet that I'll share it was like because I remember it. He's like, they say marriage is about compromise, but I don't have to compromise anything with this woman. And I was like, that's not fair, really okay, But I was like, actually, like I think it's true kind of God, damn it, head role. She's just so cool, like he really, I do believe. It makes me believe in true love. That's what I wrote in their little guest book. I was like, and their love makes me believe in true love and like how someone has like a soulmate kind of or like the world like rewarded this man who was so looking for someone in his life to like share life with, and it was just you'll see when he reads his vows. I'm so happy he agreed to do that when he comes back. So since last episode, I've been to a Flaming Lips concert, which was awesome. I you know, I went and saw the beautiful musical. I'm doing things every fucking night of my life. Tonight, I'm going to Matchbox twenty bucket tailor Chris, Chris's parents, my parents, my sisters Matt Green and Courtney Landrum from her show, and her boyfriend Nick. So it's twelve of us. I asked Rob Thomas for twelve tickets because I know Rob Thomas and imbed him and said, yes, Rob, I am asking you for comps. I am so sorry you encouraged me to do it on you I wouldn't have done it if Anya wouldn't have told me in the girl's chat that it's okay. No, it's not your fault. I got them people. You didn't tell me that I could do it, right, You said it.
I said, I pay.
For any that I can't. Did you? Yeah? Yeah, I said, I did exactly what you said.
But did he make you pay? No?
Nice?
No, he probably doesn't have any friends in Saint Louis.
He said, we have no guests. It should be fine. I was like, I'm so embarrassed to ask for this number. I cast a wide net because I thought people like would have kids and like got to get up early. But I was like, everyone's a huge fan and wants to go, and so my I have twelve people want to go. I'll pay for whatever you don't want to give me. I'll pay for all of them. I'm so embarrassed by this. And he said I can't get everyone has to COVID test before to go backstage. I was like, I would never bring eleven people backstage to meet you, and I want anyone who's ever coming to my show to know that too. If you have a big group, I will grant you them maybe if you're my friend, do not bring your whole fucking family backstage. That's too many. So I was like horrified that he thought I was going to try to bring twelve backstage to meet him, but he gave me five backstages. So Taylor's going with me backstage, my brother, my sister.
True Taylor, are you a big fan?
Like we were talking about how he was kind of a heart throb. I mean he was one of my first that I was like, that's like a kind of a man that I think is really cute. It's the first man he reminded me of pasty And you didn't agree with that from Dawson's Creek I had, Like I just like he's like my type of face, and like and the curls like that that nineties haircut where it kind of Taylor is saying, it comes out from under the ears a little bit.
It's like a miniature Jennifer anis dancing.
And and he kind of even had Jenniferans and at the top, like it's just kind of like, yeah, oh no, it was kind of more spiky.
I don't really remember it like it was Dona.
It's like it was done up so Donnuts. If you don't know it's I think we've covered it on the show, but it would be impossible to go back and find it. We called guys in high school that were like hot in this certain way that they listened to fish. They like probably like Dave Matthews. They like liked hokashell necklaces, they like drove.
Vans, like the heel of their pant was shredded all the times.
Du h h, yeah, Donna. So it comes from the guy that was the quintessential donnut, that was so hot. He had curly, moppy hair, he had like those like kind of corduroy like thin corduroy pants. Yeah, talk like this, and he had like he just was a He liked grateful, dead and fish. His name is Ryan Wilson, and so there's a fish song called Wilson and it's Donna, Donna.
Don't know.
It's like this bass note. So Dunna comes from Brian Wilson, who represents what that thing is. And we were like, oh, and so whenever we would see him, we would go Wilson, don'na. We called them. One day we agreed to call them.
Do these guys always have marijuana on them.
Yes, yeah, someone around them will have it.
Oh, hackey sack one hundred billion.
They've got a frisbee on hand, hacky sack. Maybe those they've definitely in college in the early two thousands tribe that game where it's like those strings run like in the courtyard of college where there's like those rubber bands between trees and they're like balancing on it.
Slack line.
Slack line. They were stylines.
They had volvos okay, yes, everything, Oh yeah, far from pooping what they have v Yeah, that's what Wilson did.
Ryan Wilson had that. It was like, because I was in love with him secretly his like said v vevy there.
You remember.
Remembers we were saying it just last me. I don't know why I said er vevy there, but that's.
Like those like we are everywhere.
Yeah, but it said ver vevy like I don't even it might have said we're everywhere and there was like maybe a little bit of it rubbed off the w owners ver. Maybe it was oh my god, oh it was so stupid. But anyway, Yeah, so I just want to go through how many Matchbox twenty songs everyone knows because people please ask my mom to go with me. You're I know they have.
Besides the Santana one, which I loved.
Yeah, well, that's just Rob Thomas solo and I've checked their set lists for tonight because it's pretty static throughout their tour and he's not doing any of his solo stuff, which is also stuff that I really love, but bashs twenty themselves. Okay, Taylor, we can all complete this. I'm just gonna should I can I play just seconds of the song.
As long as it's less than ten Oh?
Great?
Okay, yeah, okay, that's three am? Is three am? Almost be only?
That's Oh?
That one is nove My Hamless touch me? You know that I won' want to push you around?
Will Yes?
Yep, Okay, here we go.
Oh this is a good one. Yeah, this one.
We used to play these songs all the time on radio and in supermarkets and everything.
That's the thing it was to anytime you would go into a supermarket, a gas station, Panera, anywhere. I'm not crazy, I'm just a little well.
I know right now, I can't tell.
I forgot I'll these iconic guitar for sure.
I guess I've already lost you. I'll guess you're already gone. I think I'm found. You think I'm right.
I think you're wrong.
Yes, So that one's I think you're so mean. I think we're gonna try. Think this is.
My life friend. I think I'm scared.
Do I talk to mush? That's a problem I'm feeling. If you're gone, it's time to comb home. Okay, we have to just get to the calm home.
Like Adam Durts will do that.
The calm.
It was a nineties inflection of Jammy and he's you know, it's who he is. This one's a newer one. Okay, I know that one. Let's see how far we've come. Let's see how far we've go.
For me, Rob Thomas really transitioned from like a guy that I wouldn't really look at to like, holy ship, he's hot when he cut his hair. When he cut off that hair, you guys are proving over my I.
Was, I don't remember when he cut it. Let me see when he cut it.
I remember he was like on Howard Stern and maybe the early Ots or something or late probably, and I was like, oh my god, he cut his hair and he changed his step.
When he shaved it when he buzzed.
It was.
See, I'm so bad. This is airing after I meet.
It, and he was wearing ray bands, like cool ray bands.
Buzz head like Chris had after mohaw, Mama.
That looks like I think you should leave?
Oh guy, he kind of does look like Tim Robinson from I Think You Should Leave. Oh yeah, yeah, I like you better with curls. I'd like you to make that hair curls. Yeah. No, it's showing us pictures, that one in the red red shirt.
Can you google Rob Thomas aviators because I feel like there was an aviator thing? Yeah, because I remember I was like, what the fu? Look at that one on the still to that top left is my type right there.
And he loves his wife so much. It's like so sweet.
Okay, he's almost Christian Bale, Like.
There's a lot.
Yeah, short haired, one of those.
I want to see it blown up.
Short short hair aviators real specific with our this is it's not.
A tab for Rob Thomas. Short hair.
I hope he.
Believe it doesn't just fill in for you. No, there's no short hair there he is. I mean that's a short Yeah, he's he's cute he's hot, it's very exciting. He's so nice, and he's giving me twelve tickets to night So we're going to that tonight and then tomorrow for my birthday, Chris got me tickets to go see Tea and In Sarah. So I'm like, yeah, I'm going to give him the ultimatum there, I'm gonna jump in. I'm going to say.
You either one of you gets Tea and I want to gets there.
I love them so much and so adventurous, you're so.
Up to I love well, you know, Flaming Lips was an I'm not saying yes to any concert. By the way, these just so happens to be like bands. I really care about Fight Tests. By the Flaming Lips, they were playing Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots that whole album like first, and then they were doing more So.
Is that Holla's favorite album?
Yeah, she named her dog after Yoshimi. So, but that first song, fight Test, off that album. I had to be there right away because the first song of Fight Test is in my top five favorite songs of all time. It's one of my fits. It was so good. I know, it's such a cry. I love that because I'm a man, I don't know it's not a boy and there are she can't a boy. You have to take it when you're not prepared. I don't even know why I like it so much, but I think it's because whatever key that's in whatever, there's some elements of that song that make my perfect song because it's it is like when there's like a pleading in a song, like there's this new tailors of the song You're losing Me, and she's just like she's telling the guy like it's it tells us a window into her recent breakup, not with Maddie Heally but with Joe Allen, and she's like in it, she's like, you're losing me, and she just like keeps screaming it, but it's almost like begging, like try to like get me back, but also like sorry, Like at the beginning, she's kind of like, I love the sorry. I'm just gonna do a little swifty song analysis right now, but I think they're twelve percent of our listeners care the song You're Losing Me. It starts out it's so good. She's like, you say you don't understand, You say you don't understand, and I say I, no, you don't. And it's so good because it's like you know that someone's like I don't understand, and she's like, I know you don't, but it's just and it's but there's kind of like a little bit of in the first verse, there's a little bit of her being like I gave you, like I'm letting you maybe try to win me back. And then by the second verse, she's like, I gave you so many signs. I bit my nails all the time, like you, my face was my skin was gray, but you wouldn't admit we were sick. These are some of the lyrics of just like you should have known that, Like how do you say you love someone you can't see is dying? Like this relationship has been fucked. I've been like miserable in it. You don't even notice this is coming out of nowhere for you. I've been miserable for months and maybe I didn't say it out right, but like you should have Like it's not it's weird that you wouldn't notice. I'm I don't like you anymore. So then by the but then by the third verse, it's over and you could tell he's by the bridge, he's running down the hall She's like, now you're running down the hallway, and you know they all say, you don't know what you lost until it's gone. You don't know what you got until it's gone. So then you can tell he's trieding to like fighting back. And then the I love the way she changes the chorus in the last In the last chorus, she like is like sorry, like stop, you're losing me, Like this is you're embarrassing yourself, like I'm gone, And I love a song that like takes you on a try rip like that as well.
Is there anything in your past relationships that was like the indicator that it's over?
Like what is it for all of you?
Oh?
Yeah, that's a good point where it's an indicator that it's over, Like how.
Do you know having too many like white chunks in the corner of your lips.
Like you don't find those charming anymore?
Would never date anyone that ever?
No?
No, I mean like if so, are you talking about show up during a relationship suddenly they got it and you were like at no, but I'm saying in the past, do you think, but what has happened in the past where someone I think what I'm predicting is going to be said, because I've heard this before, is that when you're disgusted.
That's what I was going to say, when you get or whatever it's called, yeah.
The which you would get from the white stuff in the corners before yeah, or if they get like sloppy, like if they get like so drunk and you're embarrassed. Were like, so you.
Love someone you could put up with, you get disgusted by their physicality. Their physicality doesn't have to change that much, and you can be disgusted by them when you finally are like not in love with them anymore, I think, and like cognitively, like we were talking about, like as a woman, like if the emotional bond is broken, they can become kind of disgusting physically, whether they get the white things on their mouth or not. Like they could have a clean mouth and you could still be like, I don't even though I liked you a month ago, and you've looked like this right now, I'm repulsed.
Don't you think that's because you made them much hotter by loving them? Like when you first meet something, you're like, they're pretty cute, but sometimes you're like I didn't even notice that guy the first ten times, and now he's the hottest man ever. Didn that happen? Happens?
It happens to one of the people on the ultimatum. Actually, there's this girl that starts out like fine, and she gets so fucking pretty the more she is loved by this person, She's finally like in a relationship where she's getting showered with love, like real intimate love, and she turns into a glowing Princess's watching to see who you think it is. But yeah, no, I think I think people love it. Definitely. It's like talking to a plant and being like I love you. When the plant like grows, I'm realizing I'm trying to think of other things.
Relationships. You know how they always say like they always come back. Just wait, they always come back for me, like they've never come back, always.
Like they're gonna come back someday.
And all my breakups have been like violently like traumatic or not violent, but like like you're cheating on me and you do drugs. It's always like, what, like you've cheated on me every day for the last six years and you're a cocaine addict.
Was there any part of those people because I'm just playing their side of things, which is literally the devil's advocate. I if I was cheating on someone so much and also doing drugs behind their back and all these things, I would kind of think they knew a little bit, and so I would.
Be even thought was diarrhea for the last six years as the cheater the key in the lock, I'd be like, that would go.
You have to have known, like was there any part? Were you not that? I think that is a right thing to assume, like if someone's just cheating to like slowly get you to notice that they're cheating, and then you eventually call them on it, Like not none of it's cool. But I do feel like even in Taylor Swift song, she's like I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick. I don't know what the quick means, but it didn't. I'm like you you expect him to figure out that, like, well, she's like gnawing on her cuticles and it's like bleeding. I could see that happening. I did, but I could see him being like why would I? Sometimes I don't notice those things, Like sometimes I get mad at Chris because you won't notice like something that I've been so like, so I think I'm being so pissy and like obvious about my feelings, but it's just he's not even he doesn't see it at all, and I'm like, how could not? But it's like he's just not in tune with the same things I would be in tune with. I forget what my original question.
Was, but it was I did not know that he was cheated?
Did your boyfriend ever? Go like, come on, you had to.
Know because he was a different breed of a person, like he was on the witness stand many times being interrogated by me, and every time like for a perfect liar, like I don't know what you're talking about, babe, you really need to get some therapy, Like so.
What did he say in response when you hadn't then the proof and you went back and said, all of those times, how could you lie to me? Did he have any response to that?
He left?
He left, but he never he never had to responding, ran.
Away, he disappeared, and I was like, no response, which, by the way, is a response, ladies and gentlemen, if you feel crazy in a relationship, get out, Like if you're constantly like why do I feel insane? And the person and you're like, maybe I'm crazy, You're not. Your gut is trying to tell you said some people are. I mean some people are. But yeah, he just left in shame and like I think, Like weeks later, I was like trying to piece together some stuff and he was just like, it doesn't matter. I was like, but no, I need to, like, what about that one weekend where you swore that you didn't like, did you actually camember my friend? Who I She told me that you cheated with her friend? Remember, and then I didn't speak to her for a year because you told me that friend was crazy?
Did you cheat?
And he was like does it matter? I'm like, okay, that's a yes. Like he would never give me a yes. It was maddening.
Oh my god, this guy.
Oh I hate I had the same guy. But also when I just was it on my grandpa's funeral and he's like, it doesn't mean you don't need to go through all.
Oh yeah, Like the past is the past. That's a very common f boy Island phrase. What happened in the past is the past. That means I cheat all the time, Yeah, chronically, and I and you know it's about the future. We're moving forward. I'm also going to cheat.
The audio book for Prince Harry's book. I listened to the forward because he says in the very beginning he goes, what's past is post? He goes, it's past a post and the post is in the post.
And I listened to him so many times that made me laugh. I wish he could play it. Could I play him seconds of it? Yeah?
No matter what content?
Okay, oh no, it's finely going to be the acknowledgments. I'll find it, like after the commercial.
Yeah, what's post is? We'll play it? Well, Annie will find it. We'll put it right here.
The post is never dead.
It's not even post.
William Faulkner.
Oh, wasn't that fun. We didn't hear it yet, but you guys did. Yeah. I everyone's mad at Prince Harry again and Megan Markle. They just can't get a break because they only gave thirteen episodes to Spotify for their like fifty billion dollar deal, fifty million dollars deal they got it Spotify to do a podcast and she only turned in like twelve episodes them like a titled brats. I love them and they can do no like I will defend them to the death. Now, I'm really working on this friendship that I'm gonna have with them. I think cool. I want to hang out with them, I really do. I love him. I'm gonna get in there because I'm gonna They're gonna see me on something defending them. I get. I get their side of things. Someone was just calling him a little winging wind winging. Oh, they love to use winging. It was someone that I really liked too, and I was like, I can't even watch this because this person has it so wrong about them about like all he does is wine. Oh, I'm a royal and my life sucked. It's like people that have great lives on the outside are allowed to have deep pain, especially when you're never allowed to grieve the death of your mother that was public and you had to walk behind her casket and have a and your dad didn't do any Your dad, Charles, you never got one hug from except one when you're a what eleven year old boy and you just lost your mom. No one hugs you, not your dad, and you never get to cry. You think you're gonna turn out okay, no matter what you gotta feel sorry for that person and maybe have a little empathy for them as an adult, as I would you. And whatever fucked up shit happened to you person online who's being mean to.
Them, Yeah, oh bad.
Good was when he's like, wait, Mommy's gone forever, He's like, puts his hand on his back and goes, I'm afraid so dear Lily and walks out, no, Charlie.
And he wakes him up in the middle of the night to tell him and then just leaves him in the middle of night. So from like three in the morning until they had to get up for breakfast at eight o'clock, you know, and their servants came in to like dress them, and of course everyone's like, oh they had servants. They had it so good. You would have been fucking miserable in his shoes too. Just everyone have a little idea, okay, empathy.
So just like the other perspective of that, where like I don't I don't really know them that well, so I'm not here nor there. But I guess the issue that I have with people who have a lot.
Of money behind them and all that.
Is that they have access to the best kind of therapy to get over that trauma and to rise up from it and stuff like like and just thinking about like what I had to do to afford therapy and how like crazy that was like why don't they take advantage of.
Because they do. They do. He goes to tons of therapy. He was going like five days a week, like he does all of that. So it's like who knows if it's working or what modalities he's trying, Like he was doing mushrooms for a while to do stuff with it. WHOA, did you guys just hear? This is so fascinating. So they were doing an experiment with MDMA on a bunch of like trial people that were just trying to make some money. This is so cool. So they were doing a trial of you know however many people, and one of the people in the trial said wrote into the experiment people and said, I am google my name, you'll know who I am. I realize something big and I all he wrote was google my name. I experienced something during this experiment that made me realize I have to do something big. And then they googled his name and he's a white supremacist that was fired from his job and he was all over the news because he was one of the people that was photographed at that tiki torch rally thing. You know, there's Trump said there's good people on both sides. That bullshit they like pretty much a Nazi rally, a march that they did forget where killing in North Carolina. Yeah, So he was photographed there, lost his job because of it, all over the news. So these people in the study google this guy's name and they go, oh my god, he's gonna do something big. That's all he says in is like cryptic email, and so they contact him to be like, what's going on, dude, And he's like, I just while on MDMA, I realized how ridiculous this all is, and I love everyone, and I don't want to be a white supremacist anymore. And like had a fucking epiphany. And so they think MDMA can like kill racism, Yes, because it opens your heart in a way that you can't hate eat.
Yeah, And I mean that's pretty cool.
It's so I want to do MDMA.
You should be forced in jail if you do, like a hate crime to do MDMA until you have How do.
I get MDMA and do it? And how am I? Will someone please reach out to me about like mushroom therapy, MDMA therapy, No in a healthy way where it's like.
You have a friend who does that on a record, my friend's sister who's coming to town.
Yeah, Neil Brennan. But I want I don't know. I just want to know all of my options about how to do this, like clinically, so that I can have some like fucking epiphanies about life and my place in it, because I do. I really believe in all of these things, and I want to start learning how to do it that it isn't just some guy who gives me a baggy of stuff.
What kind of therapies of U seen really work for people with severe mental illness and blocks like in your people.
Do like peyot and mushrooms and MDMA and like basically anything d MT anything you've seen it. There's all kinds of drug assisted therapy. Not like I haven't like personally met anyone that you know, seen them before and after, but like my friends have done it and they're like it was great, but not like I haven't seen it.
I wanted to come on races that is whatever that has worked for Neil Brennan is not depressed anymore because of d MT. I've shared this before, but he did say that he would never recommend DMT to anyone or he couldn't pay him a billion dollars to do it again, Like he would never ever do it again. But he doesn't have depression anymore, and he suffered with it his whole life, which is even the reason why he was doing Like why would you go that far? He'd tried every kind of thing and uh and yeah, so that's interesting. Okay, we're gonna go to break and come back and talk about something else. We're back another popular topic on the Girls Chat and get one on your bingo card. Thank you to Nicki Glazer Nikki pod memes. I think it's called for making a bingo card of all the topics I talk about every time when it's on the show. See if I've hit how many a pod memes? Nicki pod memes?
What's that Instagram?
Yeah? Okay, so let's see on the on the bingo chart he made talks about succession, haven't done it yet? This doesn't count.
I have to talk about a TV show? Should just be a TV show that you're watching.
I think six, I like six, No, because that's like every pod. Yeah, it has to be I think it has to be more specific. I think he nailed it or she I have no so I have no kids so I can spend money on. I didn't mention anything of that. Yeah, I don't think I mentioned Taylor Swift. Okay, so you got one saying someone saying okay, I said it. Okay, Kobs said Nikki Trash talking certain instant accounts.
You almost got there.
Yeah, yeah, we will, we will.
Yeah, let's get there. Nikki complaining about her previous, present and future voice. No, I haven't done that yet.
This person.
Someone jokes about Apple rankings, didn't even talk about Apple rankings dot com. Niki talks about no free will. I haven't touched on that yet, but I don't know.
I'm not.
No, I think I still do this stuff, and then mentioned the girls chat. So we have we have two? Wait, we have three been we'll see, we'll see if we had any more of those. You let everyone be on a lookout for those other ones, because I want to see if we get because right now we have the upper right hand corner, the bottom right hand corner, and the left middle side, So we are we don't even have close to bingo right now or TikTok toe okay, so oh no, we could get to okay, but I went to happen naturally, So I'm gonna try to reset from my mind on the girl's chat. So that's why I thought of this Anya. Anya always has genital questions, general genital.
Question, genital She came up with.
One the other day. I don't even know what spurred it. Will you tell us the genesis of it?
I don't know what it has been like eating at me, I guess. And I was just maybe somebody was talking about they're I don't know, I can't remember, but I was like, I'm sick of seeing women wipe or people talk about wiping, like obviously you wipe front to back, right, Oh yeah, yeah, of course of course, Like I have a ut I, oh, you're wiping front bragging about that.
They're all bragging about it.
Get what I know.
And you'll see a European film and a woman sitting on the toilet and then she pulls one of these. Okay, I'm gonna do it. She does this.
So Anya's taking her hand behind her backside.
After pee and wipes, so she'll just do that, and it's like all the American audiences will gasp because we don't wipe that way. In the States, we wipe like this, so.
We should You should just go like that. You should do claw really hard to that's the best way. The European way is to start at the vagina from the back.
But don't you do two separate wipes front and back.
If I'm just paying, you take the pe and follow. But in European films, a woman peace and then she reaches around her butt. Okay, And I'm saying I'm sick of this posing. I think a lot of women are wiping front to back. They're just not grabbing their butthole and wiping. They're just wiping their vagina.
They're urethra. I wipe back to front from the front, like you're not supposed to, like you're like everyone thinks you're bringing ship up into your vagina. But I don't even get near I don't even get near my tink. It's just my vagina. I wipe, just my vagina to the front, and I don't get I don't get East infections, I don't get ut I s except from sex. So I'm not going to change the way I do it.
I think the worrying about it is during poop and p I don't think anybody's worrying that when you didn't poop, there's still going to be some poop.
Yeah, there's stuff.
People worry.
I thought it was just poop and pe I was like, who into the vagina?
So yeah, I was just taking a pole to see because I thought like, maybe I'm the only woman that wipes back to front, but you said dab, but really I'll just wipe technically back to front. But it's not like Nikki said, it's not past the perineum.
Yeah, your taint gives you a good quarter to a half an inch before you're eating in the asshole region to play with and you can't play with it.
Something disgusting that. I Yeah, sometimes if I'm doing both right, sure I will take my pee because I go from front to back and I'll use the wet I've never heard of that.
Yeah, what the.
Fuck you if you're far from the sink, because I also get a blob what Yeah, I have never, But sometimes I do the under the sink with the pea because there's not very much to use.
Your own pee as a wet wipe.
Or said spit on it.
I was like, I done that for some reason. That grosses me up.
There's like food on food in your mouth, but I have thought about it. I'm like, why is my butt hole mint tea? And I'm like, oh, I just brush my teeth.
Have you ever used your.
Sounds nice?
We never used your period blood as lube because they don't know you're on your period yet of course, and you're in the dark and you're they're like, they think you're super. Sometimes I'm just like I didn't and I don't know. I'm just like I guess I am. And I'm like, oh, you got it out of me.
Yeah, that's what I say. Made it start.
Yeah, But even though it's been going for tamp on it, I think I had that joke actually in my ec Okay, so we covered that. I went to the pool yesterday with my niece and neph the public pool. I have never I haven't been to a public pool since we were kids. That's where me and Taylor film love was the Tree Court public pool where it we'd spend every single day of every summer between seventh.
But it was private.
It was private. Yeah, it felt public.
To be a membo.
But I mean, like I still had to at the YMCA yesterday, I still had to like, yeah, that's I didn't feel that public. I paid thirty two dollars. Well maybe it was thirteen, but then plus the kids and stuff. Anyway, went with three kids, three kids under the age of six, just swimming in a pool and my sister. How are not more kids under around it all the time at these pools? Because there is a lazy river there, there's a current flowing through that thing that is rough.
There's a lazy lifeguard there.
There's lifeguard. A pool runs through a lazy river.
Around the pools there is the webster goes through what's a lazy river? It pushes you.
I am confused at your question. You don't know what a lazy river is.
I've never heard this phrase in my life. Shots, I guarantee what listeners are with me?
Have you guys ever heard of a Maggie river.
I'm just imagining like just blowing water.
No, but like, do you know, like if someone's like, oh, this water park is a lazy river, do you know what that is?
No?
I think I can assume what it is. I don't know what is it?
Yeah?
What is it?
I I just imagine like a moat basically, and the water is just like slowly.
Yes, it's a river through like a river where the water is flowing, so like if you sit on a raft, it'll just take you through it and around and around and around and you could go forever around around.
Yeah.
No, it's not actually yes, it's man made and it's they're they're very common at water. I guess you've never been to a water park in your life. I'm just guessing because they're literally.
Asking one once what the lazy river? Thirteen year old just slapped me right across my face. Why because he and all his friends cut in front of me. He cut in front of my little sister and all our friends at their birthday. And I was like, hey, you can't do that anyway, and he slapped me across my face.
How old were you?
I was like seventeen.
I wanted to get stay after. I just knew you were seventeen or eighteen, oh my.
God, maybe twenty even slapped I must have been twenty if my I know, my sister was like eight nine.
But you look young, so he probably thought you were like his same age what did you do?
Rounded all the kids up and was like, we're getting out of here. I was like very shaken up.
Oh my, And how old was he?
Probably my like probably fourteen.
He was and you were twenty. I would have been like, kid, what are you doing?
He was like mine? It was I remember, Oh fuck, hit me hard. It's okay. But anyway, there was no lazy river there.
He slapped the knowledge of the lazy.
We'd have got to it if a kid didn't slap the shit out of you.
Water rides and water slides, though, but.
Every water park has a lazy river. But it doesn't matter. Do you know what a lazy using?
Yes?
Okay, good, But do you know what a dumb anya is? I couldn't think of anything that was like more specific to not knowing what a lazy river was, but I didn't mean dumb uh, So yeah it was. The lazy river was so fun. But I gave Poppy this like little unicorn that you put in water and it will grow warm water, you know, and I and she loves unicorns.
Like a sponge.
Yeah, like a not sponge, but it's like it's like a no, it actually a hill. No, not a pill. Sponge. Those are fun though, but she so it wouldn't go, it wouldn't get bigger in the cold water. I was like, you have to put in hot water, babe, because it's like not growing at all. And so at the end of the day she was like, I just so I want next time, I want it to be pink and I wanted to grow very big in the cold water. And I was like, you got it, So pink grows big and cold water. I'm on it. I will find it.
And she's she.
Was so excited about there's no such thing. It has to be in hot water. Anyway, she locked. She was holding in her hand the whole day. I gave it to her before we went to the pool. I didn't even know we're going to the pool. I just went over there to give them some gifts and they were like, we're going to the pool, and I was like, I'm free. There's no excuse not to let's go. So she lost it at one point and was like crying, and I was like, I will find it, and so I went and she lost in the lazy rivers and so in all those like she lost it right here. I'm like, buddy, it's flows so it's gonna get taken. I gotta go further because he was like, just look right here, and I had to explain physics to the things. And I was like, at least you've heard of a lazy river. You know, we are starting from a place that I can get on board with. But no, he he. And so then I was I had to borrow goggles from this little girl. So I was wearing the tiniest little goggles and I was like, oh, back in five minutes, I'm going to look for this thing. And so I went and I found it. I went all the way around the lazy river, and it was disgusting what was going on in there, because any piece of debris, I was like, is that band aids? It was band aids, hair ties with like tons of hair all over them and like tissue paper, lifeguard. It was so gross, syrench. I honestly, I would not have been surprised. And so I get all the way through the lazer of where I couldn't find it. But then there's this little part that like kind of you goes off and turns into a whirlpool, so it's like a little yet eddie and you just go around and around and it was swirl around. I couldn't believe I found this tiny little white unicorn in this white, you know, painted pool and and I like heroically was like got it, and she just like took it from me. And I'm like, are you not gonna be like excited that I was. She's like, I don't know how I dropped it. I was holding and I was just like, oh, that's interesting. It wasn't but she so I felt like, you know, a book. After an hour being there, I was just like we gotta go, like can we ditch these kids like and like go talk or something like? Its just it never stops. It never ends. And my sister just said, it never ends. It doesn't ever end because they're into everything and they could all drown at any second because they're not all that strong of stummers. It was just a lot.
I was a woman who lives across the street. She has a beautiful young mom and she just had her second kid, and I see I think that she's pregnant with her third, and every time I look out the window, she's parenting. Like there's always a child on a driveway in a wagon rushing towards traffic. She's stopping it. I'm just like, this is like twenty four to seven.
Hypervigilants aren't dying all time. I was saying this to Emma this weekend, Chris's sister in law, because she's a young kid's like like a toddle. You know, they're toddling everywhere. And I'm like, how did kids when they were like fire open fires and like sticks and shit, like, how were kids not just being impaled and burned constantly? And I think they probably were, or they treated them like a dugger and they did the blanket.
With what's wrong with a leash?
By the way, kid? If the kid would go off the blanket and the duggers would like hit the kid a baby until it to be docile and not go off the blank You haven't watched kids like it?
I don't.
Did you watch it?
I tried to watch. I watched two parts and I was just like, it's too slow. I need things to have two times to speed. That's why I love the Girls chat. I can zip through it. That's why I love podcasts. Stop YouTube, I can two times to speed. I can't do it.
I think that's bad for us, though, ye because it it I think it likehibits us from uh retaining attention. I almost lost track of my thoughts.
But but it's for people with a d D. Like all the a d D chats on Reddit where people actually for their kids are like, you know, I'm my kids having trouble in school, and they're like, try to get lessons. To do the lessons the teacher sends and do them two times to speed because my kid can then follow it. Because there's there's a lull, the kid will look at something else.
I had to stop listening because I would do like one point five times on the Girls Chat, and then I realized, like, I think everyone's voice is this fast and everyone sounds like kind of cheery, and then when I listen to it out one speed, it's complete, like the tone is completely different, characterizing everyone.
Part of the podcast on one point five.
It's it's so true because I will listen to, like, you know, someone crying and they'll like actually sound and I'm really sad about it and you know, my dad died, and it does it does change everything when you listen.
To We're always crying on that by the way.
Yeah, it does create bad habits. I do think there's something nice about listening to things on regular speed or not being not multitask all the time. I was on a Zoom meeting the other day and someone said something and it was really interesting and I missed it and my first thought was I'll just rewind, and then I'm like, fuck, this is real time.
I can't rewind. I've been taking some like voice lessons online doing this like course, and yeah, I constantly because she isn't talking two times the speed. She loses me all the time because I have too much time to venture away. I think for me, it helps my focus to keep things moving. I can't like movies and TV shows. I rewind hundreds of times in any TV show, hundreds because I get distracted so much because it's so slow. Do you guys not have that trouble?
I would never I have that too.
And it's I think it's it's my phone that's created this problem, because as you're talking, I'm like, okay, it's like which came first, a chicken or the egg?
Was it your.
Focus that was inhibited first? Or was it because of like all these Oh I was not like this in school.
I did not suffer add in high school, like like this I mean, I was disorganized. I had many of the signs of it, but I was not like my attention was. It was not hard for me to like, I was really good. Now that I'm in like a class again, it's the first time I've been like learning and in a zoom it's a zoom class. But I do these like once a week, and I realized, like what a little good student I was, because I was always like nodding along with the teachers so they'd know that I got it. Like I wouldn't do it just like out of nothing, because then they'd call on me and I wouldn't know. But I was always like, you want to give them feedback of like I got it. Like I was like, man, I was a really good student, and now I'm really suffering keeping up with the work, keeping up with the lecture, taking notes, like I just it's so out of.
My real.
It's perview, that's all right. I just feel like I'm wearing too many hats. I'm trying to be a good student. I'm trying to be a good thing.
At the end of the day, it is Oh yeah.
That is true. I mean, it all does come down to that. Have you guys taken any classes recently. Have you like taken like school classes where you have like a curriculum and like a syllabus.
No, but i'd be down.
I just graduated two years ago.
God, it was truly.
I didn't go for ten years or something.
It was hell getting back into it.
Yeah, to go back to school again for three years?
Oh my god, hell hav to. I just remember that last paper I ever turned in, How grateful I was. I was like, I'm never gonna have a paper due the rest of my fucking.
I still have nightmares about papers.
Me too, But you had pt papers up until.
You've got minor like high school still or like I forgot my locker combo style.
Oh yeah, that's a popular one. Do you ever lose your teeth in your dreams? No, that's another one that happened still out in my nightmares. I never get I've never naked in my dreams.
I'm always trying to masturbate, but I can't get alone. Interesting like every night.
WHOA isn't that weird? Well, another weird thing happened to you right now that you shared on the g GC. It is yes, string, Oh.
I have a string there? Did you know about it you guys did on the.
GC, so I never had there's someone I want you to share because I'm sure there's someone out there.
This is for my friend Hannah, So it's I never describe it. I described it to my friend Hannah. It's like your belly button kind of hurts, but it feels like there's a rubber band going from your belly button to your vagina. And we googled it and apparently only women can have it because some part of your umbilical cord could still be in there, like the inner part, and that's where it would kind of connect. And so right now I have it, I can't straighten up all the way or it feels like the rubber band will snap and it pulls both my belly button and my.
So there's got to be something in there connecting that.
There's a there's the strings.
Or is it an actual physiological part?
Well, what we that it's actual physio logical part. Perhaps this is just somebody like when we were it's really hard to google that and the.
Doctor they'll be like, I've never heard of that. Look it up and you're like, I've already done that, and you're not gonna find anything I didn't find.
So it could be ambillcle is still up in this.
War.
Someone like it. I guess it feels like I Or it could be maybe I've never had any, but it could feel kind of like you got like maybe you got a pee, but.
Necklaces like wrapped up in each other. So what if there's two different chords that go like that intertwined to sometimes they got to get on and that's why they snag.
Yeah, maybe it's a nerve, Taylor, I don't know.
I had a weird guy as a kid that was like a phenomenon that you used top into me and my sister where everything would just go speaking of two times as speed. Everything would go really fast and seem really loud, and my mom like would talk and we'd be and I'd like, I can't don't talk anymore, Please don't talk anymore, because you're really fast and you're really loud. It's like it was like this weird thing that would come on. I would feel it coming on and I'd go like oh no, no, no, no no. It would sometimes happen when it would be very quiet, like during a test, and then all of a sudden, the pen, the pen sounds would be like booming loud, like not actually I knew they weren't actually loud, but I like and then but also very fast and also like slow mo. It was like this weird distortion of reality. And my sister was the only person who had it too, and it didn't it stopped happening after childhood, and then if you google it, final thought, if you google it things speeding up very fast and getting loud. It is a phenomenon that happens to a lot of kids, and it tapers off after adolescents. But it used to happen all the time, and my sister and I would always just go it's getting loud and slow and fast, and all like it's slow and fast. It doesn't even make any sense. But my mom would have to just stop talking and I would just have to like like kind of like burrow myself in bed and like cut out all the sounds to make it go away. So if anyone else had that, that is a thing that happens to all of us. And also the thing that I think happens to all of us is that like thing where you like have I guess it's heartburn, where you like feel if you like breathe in too much, it'll like hurt again, like when your heart has like a sting feeling still.
You know what when you when you're esophaguesses two of them for some reason?
What get twist?
Really? I know, but it feels like that I got so many strings and stuffe I hear.
That the esopha guy would never be used unless you were like collecting esophaguses, Like why would anything? Like I don't know the esophagus twist I do.
Have sometimes it feels like it twists.
I have a thing sometimes like I'm sure people get this, like a weird pulled muscle in between your ribs and it feels like you're having a heart attack, Like it happened the other day in bed and I was like, babe, I might die if I die in my sleep.
I'm having a heart attack if I die. I'm just something weird's happening right now. And it's like it's three in the morning.
That's like, what is going on. I'm like, there's a spasm in my heart and I don't know if I'm dying or if it's a rib muscle then it.
Was just is that the feeling I'm talking about where if you move it'll or breathe too much, it'll come back, like you feel it for a second. Noah, do you ever have that? I can't believe you guys don't have this. I have not had so it just all of a sudden, there's a stinging. And then you're like, I have to stay frozen because I'm the stinging almost felt brought on by my breath in my heart. Oh my god, that's another commonation. That does not mean you're dolmost if you do get that, it does not mean you're dying.
Do you guys know? And then like I was bit by spiders, so many spiders, and it only happens at night.
I used to see spiders going to.
I'm really just kidding.
Spider is symbolic of the mother. I learned that, what really, Yeah, I'm afraid of spiders and I would have dream spider dreams, and my therapist is like, that means mother.
Spider means mother a Russian therapist.
Yes, my mom's also afraid of spiders.
Yeah, I'm not scared of spiders at all. Centipedes, I would rather, I mean, I would rather a thousand spiders in a room with me than to centipedes.
Which way would you wipe with a centipede if you had a.
Sipede connecting your belly button clip.
And it just went.
I can now look at videos and pictures of centipede, but as a kid, I wouldn't even look. I couldn't touch pictures if it was on my phone or something. They like house centipedes.
I remember that broom one I had.
The one that was you know, that was a millipede. It was just crawling across the floor. It looked like a sharpie. That was just it was rich on the other No, millipedes are like have like the boldest body, and centipedes are the ones that are like like they move like that sound like and they go all different ways. Silver Fish are like kind of centipede dish like, but they are not centipedes, but a pizza or anything with like that many legs all lined up together. Spiders have them more like, oh, daddy, long legs, daddy. I used to I don't mind them if they're like traps and along and like their legs, but I don't like when they go up on the wall and they go flat.
I hate when they just clinking, clinking flat in the shower they go, don't they do?
I think that's kind of cool. I don't. I don't want them to be flat.
I feel bad actually about killing any animal in the house, except that scary looking silverfish, house centipede, whatever it is.
It looks like. I don't think I could kill one because I loves But I do understand what you're saying. I yeah that, first of all, the too scary to catch, even if you like get a bowl over them and you slide a like piece of paper underneath. I don't want to touch the paper that might be.
And they get flatty. They are so flat that they could.
Yeah, those things get they daddy long, like they don't know where they're going.
A mouse so fucking flat. I saw a mouse come out. I saw a mouse come out of a hole that was like you could barely fit a silver.
Dog or like OCTOPI. They're just like a rare Esha guy.
A rat came out of my floor in San Francisco, the size of a quarter.
Yeh, never creep me out.
And when the unicorn and a lazy when they bust through your floor, he'll be scared.
But some are like naturally scared scared, like in a way like spiders.
I think people are scared of the fastness.
But some people like it's almost like, okay, let me, let's do a ranking right now. Snakes, spider, mouse, mouse number one all.
I like spiders and I like snakes. For me, the the rat represents disease, and I'm scared it's gonna bite me.
And you have a disease. Oh, you're thinking long term with this thing. I don't think I think about short term with all of these things. But you're right, that's that's probably smarter. Oh you're thinking about their lineage as well. Okay, I didn't. I didn't even. I didn't know it was just twenty three and me.
FIGHTERS would never even though my grandma one time said, I asked why I couldn't borrow a car, and she said the spot and his WAF had babies in there because they couldn't have sex unless they were married.
Oh yeah, and that's why I couldn't bother and they could live together. I mean, this would be in sin. That's so funny. I would. I've never mice. I think are always cute. I don't mind them. Even if one was in my house, I would not try to kill it. I wouldn't get a mouse trap.
I don't.
I just never came mouse, mice and rats. She's just a bigger mouse to me. Doesn't doesn't matter, I don't. It just didn't get to me. The black plague stories of how rats spread that I just did.
There was the fleas that snacked on them.
Oh okay, so it wasn't even the rats, all right. And I would say Number one is snake. I would be the most scared because those can bite the shit out of you, and they're just like it too slitherly. They also don't know where they're going. Spiders, and they have more of a plan. The spiderstick to like a straight line, you know. Centipedes are going every which way, there's zig zagging. They don't know. Spiders tend to go in one straight line like you can kind of trace them. And they're easier to like pick up and flick.
If you can get flat spidersh's so flat, but found.
I'm saying in your bed, in your bed, a tarantula, snake, a snake that can't bite you, let's say, and a rat that has no teeth.
I would welcome this name.
A rat that has no teeth and its claws, and I've been checked and his claws can't scratch and claw, which is so mean, a gummy rage grandpa.
Because he wants to snuggle, He's gonna want to burrow with him snuggling.
He can't hurt you. He's just a little he's he's sick. Okay, what if they've been tested for sickness and the.
Neighbors pet rat that escape.
With them, they're gonna I don't want to be in with any of them. You're making me.
Okay, you have to be in a bed with red under your doubt. And this rat has no diseas, has been checked, no disease, is a pad and it has and it has, but you don't but and and no teeth. Okay. Then there's a spider that cannot not disease, can't give you disease, and has no fangs, will not bite you. And then there's also a snake has no fangs, and it's a medium sized snake, and it also has no fangs and won't even try to But you won't even bite you with a skin. What are you gonna do?
Definitely, I love the snake the best.
To say two minutes in a bed.
Yeah, and your Oh, I love it.
I would hold my legs really well. Yeah, I wouldn't want it.
I don't want it.
Dildo in Oh my God, trying to go in back in its nest.
Yeah, I think i'd like to snake the mice too.
He's cute.
I would like the rat. Spider get the fuck out of there. I'm gonna squish you. I'm gonna hurt you.
I feel like it has nothing to do with me. He'll be fine, he'll just crawl away.
But you're blindfolded and you don't know it's in the dark.
He's gonna put all eight in and bust into your bee hole. I'm just protecting my bee He's going to go feet first.
And I was gonna say, if I'm if I'm wearing underwear, it's the spider. If I'm not wearing underwear, I guess it would be the rat.
The rat just wants to get in your crack and warm up. He does not. He can't fit.
Yeah, you don't want that. That spider could fit in your asshole, and you've got to consider that places.
He would go right up in my vagina.
I don't want I don't know that spiders are looking for warmth. They're always in caves and ship so I want to take your vagin. Okay, well, I'm glad we have this discussion. I feel so much because people are either snake, spider or mice. People like there's that fear. And I would probably say I'm most scared of spiders out of bulldos because they just don't they're just too their legs, they go too fast.
I didn't know this about you really.
But snakes. But there are certain people that if you even talk about snakes or like have a snake, I think, what's Kim Kardashian Ellen, That's one way she tortured her on her show. It was spiders. Actually with Kim Kardashian, she was terrified of it. It was like on that Mory episode where the girls scared of cotton cutting. That was so crazy that he did that to her.
I know, but it was the highlight of my life.
This girl was scared of cotton and they dressed a man up. I can't even say it. They had to then go and get the cotton and like put glue on it or something, and it was just scared.
You guys both have this phobia of cotton where you can't talk about cotton without your mouth.
I do, but I do, But Taylor, I'm just talking when she's just supporting me.
When we were kids, I would put a sock in my mouth.
And don't want I can't. There was another thing this weekend that I was like disgusted. There was oh, oh, those motorcycles and that thing we talked about that.
Oh. Another fear of mine as a kid used to be semi trucks going under going under bridges and getting stuck and just being like and like screaming off the top. I used to have fucking there was a semi truck and there was like a bridge coming up. I'd be like, it's not gonna make it. If you ever look, there's like two inches to play with them.
It's nuts they're driving.
Those people. They I don't know. I can't even imagine it.
You're afraid because then it would smash you, or it just would just.
Cause so much mayhem on a highway with people going seventy miles an hour and then all of a sudden, this thing it would either knock out the bridge and be so big and like a huge catastrophe. But I just don't want to see people dying everywhere. Uh uh, and it would cause people to go, my pair is dying everywhere. There you go.
Do you have empathy, Nikki?
I don't because I don't want to see people dying.
Because you're meeting yourself a question if I have empathy? Oh I thought you. I thought you had, or a therapist had. You're always like, I don't know if I'm that empathetic. You've definitely said that before.
Donna used to say I didn't, But I definitely think I'm empathetic. Okay, I definitely.
Yeah, you have animals.
Yeah, you can't be vegan unless you're empathetic. It's there's no other reason to do it. So yeah, I think I passed that test.
What I don't like humans as much as animals?
I know it really is because humans you can explain what's going on, and animals are just like, what's happening? That's my thing. It's like, if you could talk to animals, I'd be like, yeah, let's kill them.
It's fine, this is what's gonna go with that.
So we'll put them on factory farms. I don't give a ship, but at least we can explain to them, like you we look at you as lesser beings because you are happened to be a different species, and so we get to eat you and torture you. Do you understand it? Oh you do? Okay, that makes it easier for me to do. But if you don't, if you're just like the whole time, your whole life, you're just like what should have been a part of the bingo card, Buddy Vegan. Okay, yeah, we gotta go tomorrow on the show. Oh my mom will be here, Franngie will still be on his honeymoon, but we will talk about so many things, including the Matchbox twenty concert we're going to Christy.
Run.
All right, guys, thank you for listening. Don't be cut and just use your pe