Nikki is evaluating what dictates her happiness. It definitely wasn't the overly excited barista or a chipper air line attendant. She sprinkles her strong opinions through the episode. Also, you might want to know that Nikki is at the level of fame where she has to wipe down the machine at the gym. Anya shows off her new tooth and describes what it was like getting her teeth shaven. Nikki talks about taking the stage with John Mayer over the weekend and what she is learning about the 'flow state' from the book The Art of Impossible. They listen to some Fanthrax where Besties ask Nikki for her strong opinions on TLC's Shauna Rae and for advice on handling a family affair at a wedding.
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The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's Nicky. Hello here I am. It's a Nicki Glazer podcast. Welcome to the show. I'm in Los Angeles. Still, Noah is here. Anya's here. Welcome guys. How are you this morning? Is it morning where you are? Kind of maybe now it's for me? It is, yeah, it's morning for us. Yeah. Um, top of the morning to you. My boyfriend is still asleep in the other room. Um. I went in turned on his uh white noise machine and I was like, you need to crank it up boo boo because it's just like like it's not loud enough. And I'm like, I want to talk about you, bitch. Crank that bitch now. Um, he's a snuggle buggle in the next room, and um, he had a late night last night, so he's sleeping in a little bit today. And um, what's it like? Oh done, yes, yes, yes, you both sad? Cohabitation too instead of living together? Honestly, what is this podcast? Um? Okay, welcome back to NPR. This is terry gross. Um so cohabitation it's I mean, it's we've done it before. We did it for many years, and um, I feel like we've probably lived together, um for like two years out of the ten that we've been off and on, So it's it's the same. It's always great. It's we get along really good living together. There's never been it's better than not living together for us. Always more conflict arises when we don't see each other and we're not living together, but when we're living together, we're just Maybe it's um like the whole theory of you have to make it work, like you know, how like people go when you get married, you just you get into a fight. It fights don't escalate to insanity as much because you both know that this you're going to have to make it work because you're married. And I feel like we both know there's no other place for us to go unless we get a hotel. So maybe that's maybe it just makes us feel secure, I guess, And in a relationship. I feel like like it's just so obvious when I'm secure in my relationship. To me, it's like, you know, when I realized that my happiness and my mood and so much of my life unfortunately is dictated by the security I feel with my partner. Now when I'm single, I don't know what dictates my happiness, honestly not sure, like if Starbucks filled my cup all the way to the top, if they're accepting mobile orders today, so beautiful metaphorically and literally. It's I really don't know what I don't remember, but I know that when I'm in a relationship, instability in my relationship equals instability and the rest of my life. And that is called codependency. It is also but my old therapist used to say codependency. There's this whole realm of therapists who think codependency is the worst thing. We need other people, we need to depend on people. We don't need that other people to dictate how we feel. But like there is there is always such a negative connotation with codependency, and I think that there is something to be said for like, well, there's benefits of it too, and there is a reason why we partner up as humans, and and why being single and living alone isn't ideal and why you know, there's so much loneliness going on with older people, like I get my heart has been breaking recently for old people like living alone. Like I read some stat about like how many elderly people have no one and this die alone, don't not even in a nursing home. Just die like no one is left. And it makes me so fucking sad. I can't even handle it. And so yeah, I mean we need but it's it really bothers me. I guess it doesn't bother me. It just, um it's nice to It's nice to be able to recognize when I'm feeling depressed in the world sucks and I am just in general, um so negative about everything. It's usually because my boyfriend and I are like not feeling secure. There's like we're having a lack of communication or something. But that's both sad and nice to know. But what the fuck, man, I don't want I don't want that. I don't want my happiness to be dependent on it. I mean, hasn't be dependent on something. People go, you're happy, you shouldn't be dependent on your job or like your successes at work or you know, your home life. But it's like, then, what the fuck else is it supposed to be dependent on your inner spirit and how much you like yourself? Like who has that besides and Oprah, Yeah, yeah exactly. So I gotta get a job working at Starbucks. Oh, you would probably love it. I kind of would, except today at Starbucks. The woman was so chipper it fucking annoyed. I'm not kidding you. I should have recorded it. Well, I can't do an impression right now because I would wait Chris up. But it was so loud and she was just like, hey, thanks for coming. Oh no, you did it like screaming, and I was looking around like is anyone else gonna clock this? And like I do want people to enjoy their jobs, but I felt so I've never felt worse for Starbuck work, Sparbabucks workers than them working with this overly cheery one. It's ironic light attendant like that the other day and I think I sent you were recording she was screaming on the flight and like at such a high pitch and doing a trivia game. But it was terrifying because she was screaming and all of us are just like you're taking us a hostage. It was a Southwest flight. Let me just say, why them stopp hang out because my dad always says I love Southwest. You know when Johm interviews, they ask if Southwest job interview. Every single interview, they asked, tell me a joke, and if you can't, they don't really, they don't get the job. And I go, well, if you asked me to tell you a joke, I wouldn't tell I wouldn't have one on hand. I have one now because I just read this book and there was a great joke. Now when people go, tell me a good joke, like, I'm not someone who just like carries jokes in their pocket like well too, gays walk into a bar like, I don't memorize those jokes. I like people that do. It's a skill that people have as a comedian. I do not have that skill. But what I do, like that I just read was a cop pulls over car and there's three priests inside, and the cop goes, we're looking for three pedophiles, and they go, we'll do it to dad. We all know why I like that joke. I'll screenshot it for you because it was in a David Sideris book. I don't think it wasn't It wasn't his joke. He just had a joke in a book. But it's you know, for many reasons, that's my favorite joke. But yeah, Southwest. The other day, I was on a flight and their little chip or cheery attitude, which is some people love it, and it's so sweet when someone's stupid enough to get a kick out of that, When your life is that simple that a flight attendant making a joke like is enough to make you laugh out loud, Like I look at you, and I go, how dumb? How easy is your life that this is giving you joy. I envy people that just get kicks out of dumb shit, you know, like those people in my audience. I mean, I don't think they'd even like me, because it would beat It wouldn't be easy enough to get like. I don't not that I'm like super intellectual humor by any Yeah, they just need like they just go whole and they're looking at each other like, oh, the people who clap when you land, you know, that's that whole thing, which I don't really actually hate that. I think clapping when you're landing isn't that bad. It's like kind of cute. People hate clappers when they land. But the other day I was texting with Chris because there was or maybe it was texting with you, I get you guys confused, But I was saying, like, emotionally, I get you guys confused. Text share the same kind of things. Yeah, it's the it's the pictures I send you guys. Um, although you like it from behind, that's the difference. Oh that's a cool sound. How do you do it? Yean Um, Chris saw her last night. Uh yeah, the hip dance where his strings on his hips and cuts one and his hip falls, it's the best. Um. So I was telling someone that I was on this flight and oh yeah, I was on the way out here, and there was this girl that was so loud and just being so obnoxious, and like it was the kind of person where if you were to tell them, hey, there are people, like, there's people on this flight. Like she was having a conversation with her friend next to her, and they're like laughing because she's one of these people that's just so loud and has to have every thought that comes in her head set out loud and she can't speak. She's talking to her friend. She's like, I told them that if we are delayed, I'm not sleeping in this airport. I am not sleeping to this airport. You all should be happy right now we're about to take off, Like and it was so obnoxious, but you knew she's the kind of girl that if you were like, excuse me, you're being rude, she'd be like, what did you say? Are you a racist? Fucking bit? Like it was gonna go to that, Like I just knew it. So I just unbridled self expression. Really, yeah, is that like a real thing. Yeah, it's she was Chinese by the way. If you guys were thinking she was black, um, no, she was unbridled self expression us. Yeah. So it's basically like when you just say everything that's on your mind, just like dump it. My therapist calls it shooting from the hip. Okay, you know what. I was furious as this girl at the time, and also the Southwest flight attendant who was making jokes wasn't helping because they were setting her up to be jokey and loud, so people were laughing. So then she wants attention, so now it's getting so I'm like, this is encouraging this bad behavior. But then I was like and I hated this girl. I was like seething. I was literally hoping my plane would crash so that she would be eliminated from the arm I was like having those kinds of thoughts. I have those on planes all the time, where I look around and I go, I will take the sacrifice because these people are fucking awful. Like it's usually on a Southwest flight too. Oh, you know what the problem was. It was a Southwest flight at fucking four pm direct from Saint Louis to Las Vegas, Nevada. That is your problem. You're getting on a flight to Las Vegas direct from anywhere on a Friday, and you are going to have rowdy, drunk idiots. It was like a booze cruise. So girl. Yeah, but this girl was not drunk. She was just loud and you can tell. And I just go, you know what, And I look around there's people trying to sleep. This girl is like so disruptive, and I go, NICKI, she probably grew up in a home where she never got any people. When she was trying to nap as a little girl. Her parents were probably screaming at each other, had the TV loud, listening to music. She probably never learned this poor little child. I tried to shrink her down to a child and picture where she learned this behavior where no one else's feelings matter or ear drums. And I realized this person was probably you know, emotionally abused as a child, and she didn't learn and to have empathy that this and most of the time rude asked people that have note like people on their speaker phones having full conversations. People who were blasting music in hotel rooms or apartments are just being loud. They're either drunk because you have lack of self awareness when you're drunk, or they just grew up. Just imagine how they grew up where they learned this. They probably have fucking parents. Their parents have the worst fucking parents. What do you say? I wish I had had that kind of compassion. The other day on the Southwest flight, I was so upset. I was thinking, like, how can I complain about this? I'm like, don't be a Karen, just let it go. But it was. It was terrifying, and I could tell a lot of passengers were annoyed. They were trying. That's where you look around and you kind of just go what the fuck? And that's where when it's the flight attendant, I get mouthy and I go okay, we get it, and I go ugh, I do a opian anthony, which I used to pull from as they should, as they shout should oh my god, I like, as they should is sweeping the names to that girl's boyfriend. Oh, just an ugh, Like, there's nothing more that I want to avoid in life than someone looking at me and going like, just isn't that the worst insults? It's slight. Also, a shush works too, like a s like they don't know where it's coming from. We're all kind of subconsciously programmed to shut the fuck up when we hear a sum that works. But I love an ugh and I have gotten I mean, I'm getting to the point where I'm getting too famous to be this person in public anymore, where I call out rude behavior and like and the one that gets a bit a bit loud about like no one cares, sir, Like I'll shout that, like if a guy of three rows back is like talking really loud, or like I'll go ka the other day I said so loud to someone, which they didn't even know what that meant, hasn't hasn't implied, Yeah, it's in it, it's yes. And so that's I think, why could work so well? But it is good to the point where I'm i and I know that people roll their eyes when I say I'm famous or whatever, because I would too. But it's just a thing, like the it's growing, like even I just had a voice lesson right before this, and my voice teacher has no concept of who I am, which is fine, Like I wouldn't expect him too. He's sixty five year old, you know, guy who lives in Ballwin, Missouri, and um opera like opera singer and he uh, he was like over the weekend. You know, I sang with Michael McDonald and he grew up with Michael McDonald and had told me about you know, his days back in the days, like me and Michael being in bands or whatever. And so when I met Michael McDonald this weekend, yeah, if you don't know who he is, he's in the Doobie Brothers and he's also the guy that sings like this and taken it to the streets and he um. I like went up to Michael and was like I studied with Michael Rochio, who you grew up with, And he was like, oh yeah, guy from back in the day. Like I mean he's sixty and they knew each other when they were twenties, so he was kind of like I think, but I told my voice teacher and send him all these pictures and he's like, what is happening, Like what is this? Like you're performing with John Mayer and the Ario Speedwagon. Like he was blown away, but I said him pictures and he was like, I posted those pictures on Facebook because he wanted to brag about his student, like getting to do this thing, even though it was like I was a comedian not a singer in it. And he said to me, Nikki today, he was like, I posted that on Facebook. I I had no idea how well known you are. I had no clue, and I go, I know, it surprises me as well sometimes like it's it's been, it's growing, it's growing a lot recently. And it was just so cute that he was just like people were freaking out and it was just really cute. But even yesterday, I mean, I've been doing this for probably ten years now, but when I walk on Sunset Boulevard and there is a celebrity sightseeing van, you know, there's these tmz ones, There's tons of them, and they are constantly roaming Sunset Boulevard just pointing out that's where whoever died and that's the Viper room, and like they're just going and maybe they'll see a celebrity, and I always because I know. I once was a young girl in LA who went on a celebrity tour and I would have killed to see a celebrity walking down the sidewalk. But you don't know because everyone looks normal and you don't know who is who unless you were very savvy. So I always used to say, I'm I'm a comedian, I'm I'm friends with Amy Schumer, like that was my joke back in the day. I would film myself saying it when when I was someone who was not recognizable. But yesterday I was filming a show and I was like waiting to walk into this business and I was waiting on the sidewalk and people were filming outside the business because they like love this business because of the show or whatever, and they're paparazzi out there. Then there's like a van of people that came through and they're kind of staring at me, and I'm waving at them because I'm just waiting for my I'm like, we're waiting for i don't know, sound or something lighting inside. So I'm waving to this van of people and then they start kind of like waving back and I'm like, I'm Nicki Glazer, I have a comedian. I'm screaming across traffic and the guy that's like the crew guy that's holding me is like, you like thinking, I go, I do that because not because I want attention, but because I feel like I want to give them a gift of like seeing a live animal on a safari, Like I want to be the cheetah that's like comes up and like pause at the window. Not for myself, like really, I promise, like maybe it's ten percent for myself, but I don't even think it's that. Like I really do it because I know what it means to be a celebrity fanatic and to see someone that you go, Okay, she's not like, we're not seeing Brad Pitt, but we're seeing someone who we can look at her IMDb and she's like people get excited about famous people. But that leads me to saying, oh, oh, I'm the level of famous now where at the gym I have to wipe down my equipment. Afterwards, I realized that because people want to stattle the sweat or something, oh oh that's so funny. No, because they'll think I'm they might go one person sees Nikki Glazer not wipe down her machine. And I know the way people talk about celebrities on read it and stuff, and how much people who love celebrities actually hate them and are looking for any reason to like write you off as a bad person, right, and a story like that, if one person saw me not wipe down machine, I am entitled and gross. And but the truth is, and so I wipe own machine now, not because I care about the person after me, but because I don't want to be besmirched in the public eye by one person who might see me. Because the other day at my gym in my building, I could tell these girls were like I can tell when people recognize me and they kind of look at they look at me a little long, and then I look back at them always and they're always on their phone googling and I and I've caught I mean, I'm not kidding you, dozens of Uber drivers. I've caught them kind of like rear view mirror eye contact. And then I see them on their phone Google Google comedie like, or they'll google Nikki fame and I'll see I'll see my fucking net Worth pop up or whatever the fuck they're googling. Um, They're like, she better give me a tip. But um, but I see it a lot, so I just know the I kind of know the and I's been friends with famous people so long, Like I remember being friends with Amy and just seeing people see her and then tell their friends and then like look back, Like I know, I know the steps of recognition. But I want to just say, you shouldn't wipe down your machine. If you care about germs so much, wipe it down before you work out. I think the new rule, Chris, that's perfect that you've emerged for this new rule. You wipe down a machine before you use it the person. You don't wipe it after because the only I don't care about a sweaty machine, I don't care if someone's If it is covered and discussed, I will wipe it down. But if it is, this is a perfect system because people who actually care about germs are gonna wipe it down anyway. They're not gonna trust it was wipe down before them people that really care, so they're wiping it down twice. So just stop wiping it down if you're because the people who actually care already do it anyway. What do you think. I completely agree. I need to remember to wipe it down before because it's like I care for myself and I care for others. If you're my mom, by the way, only washed us our hands before she peas, and I always thought that was gross, and then I was like, she kind of has a point. It's not like when I'm peeing, I'm fingering myself. I don't even touch myself, and pea is like clean. Actually, people like drink their peace, So if I get pee on my head, I honestly don't care. It's not like I'm gonna go like I like touch a baby's mouth or something like I usually like even if it's a little like this, this is grossing everyone out. Let's take a break and come back and like three group because I really hate to think about what I'm about to admit here. Okay, we'll be right back after this. All right, we're back. Um, Yeah, hand washing. I do it most of the time, Like, but interesting your mom does it before she goes to the bathroom because I guess I don't know why. I don't know. I take it back now because I'm like, yeah, if you touched yourself, maybe because she touches the toilet paper, and then she thinks the dirt will go on the toilet paper into her vagina. Do you know that her phones are like worse than toilet seats. Yeah, they're covered in pooh. They're like grease everything. Oh my god, I open my phone. I took my phone case off because I don't know if you know this little hack, but if you want to give yourself a speaker on your phone, you know how your iPhone speaker kind of sucks. Yeah, sorry for droid listeners, but you you probably are, like you know, I was gonna make some just higher poor no, but um for any phone. I think your speaker sucks if you put it in a glass in a in a you know, in a hotel room, might always put it in the glasses. So I had to take my cover off to fit my phone in a glass. And whoa what did you find that? It was like this? It was like digging in the seat of a of a Southwest flight like it was just it was just it was sticky, and I could I couldn't believe there weren't like silverfish living in it. I was like, this would be a perfect place for a bug to life. I remember my keyboard in college. One time a silverfish crawled out of the letter J and like went over to like the Tilda, and I was like, oh god, how was that? I have like critters living in here? I mean I was so discussing in college, just like ripping things constantly in the keyboard. Um, but yeah, satisfying. Yeah, what to open it up and clean it out? Oh? I didn't clean it. I just lifted it and go, that's gross. I like, I looked for a thing to wipe it off, but there was nothing nearby, and so I just put it back on. I mean discussed it. I don't get it. Yeah, I was like, what satisfying? Oh, cleaning something? I don't know what you mean hiring someone to clean something for you. Yeah, I guess that feels good, but I don't have a sense of accomplishment about it. Um, okay, we have to discuss the elephant in the room. Um, which are Anya's new tasks? Anya got new team? There's anymore? Yeah, but yesterday when I came, I mean, I still am having a lot of trouble speaking. I think I sound like I'm having some trouble with my list. Yeah, so's they're not permanent yet though you're like, you have a of what's it called a temporary Yeah, you know what it feels like, Nick, It's exactly like if he took two denting ice and chewed him up for like a minute and then tucked him right behind your front teeth. That's how it is to talk. So it's a lot nice new matter or material right there. Oh that you're yeah, you're doing really well with it. I can't. As soon as you pointed out, it starts to go, oh yeah, I hear it, but hey, yeah, getting like bubblegum tongue. What's that? My god? What the fuck is that? It's John Mayor lyric? Oh song? Because if you want what was it like interacting with him? Nikki? I know him. Yeah. A lot of people wrote me and were like, oh my god, tell him I love him. I'm like, I'm gone, Like the pictures are posted, this was last night. Um. I've known John for you know, just perfect. I mean I've known John about John since the year two thousand when he opened for Guster and my my, the guy that was in a little with Doug Rees took me on like what I guess, a quasi date to go see him and during your Body is Wonderland, which was the first time I'd ever heard that song. He was a new performer. We were there to see Guster, but he was like this guy John. He had seen them the night before and he was like, this kid that's opening for them is so good. And he whispered in my ear during your Body is Wondering and he goes the song is about Sacks, and I was just like, oh my God, and then um and it told me yes. I mean this was high school. This was I was sixteen, so I didn't lose my virginity for another um five years and Doug's thirty year. No, Doug was my age two. I loved time so much. Where are you Doug Reees? If any Doug Reese? That is such a popular boy's name, ninety eight Doug Grease. Yeah, that's what we called him because ninety eight Degrees was such a popular band, and so Taylor came up with it. She was like ninety eight Doug Grease. So Doug Rees r ei s if you know Doug Reese, please someone tell me how to find him and tell him I'm looking for him. I'm not trying to me like I feel like he's like, she's a comedian. I don't want to be brought into the spotlight. I will not put you on my podcast. I just want to know where you. I just want to reconnect with you and share some memories because I love you as a friend and and and I don't it's so sad that I lost touch with him. But um, that song was about sex, and that's anyway John I was like a huge fan of back in the day, and then continuing on slow Dance, Sitting in a Burning Room is one of my favorite songs. Um. I really loved his like soul album he did, or like his like um kind of like country ish, like folky album he did, Born and Raised. I think it was called like. I've been into him off and on over the years and um, and then I met him at the Comedy Seller maybe in two thousand fourteen or something like that, and he was very nice and he's like comedy adjacent, you know, his friends with a lot of comedians. So that's how I met him through that, and then we obviously connected. We obviously we connected when Bob Sagett died again and um like helped each other a little bit through that and that was really nice. And then I saw him at UM. Where else have I seen him? I guess I saw him at the after party the wake, I guess um. And then I then I called him for advice on having my vocal cord surgery because he had the same same surgery, and so he gave me good advice there and I did exactly what he said, which is like get an iPad and a keyboard, and like uh, and I ordered too small of an iPad, so I returned it. But anyway, um, and then yeah, the other night, I saw him backstage and I just we just were like hey, and just like hugged and then he was like you look great. I was like you look great. And then he had a cold, and I was he performed. I was front row watching him perform, and then and then I went backstage because we like went so I did my stand up and then I just stayed out in the audience and watched the all the bands, and then I went back for the finale backstage, and that's where I saw him, and he had a cold and he was like, I apologize. I'm singing you know, an octave lower because I have a cold. So instead of gravity, he was doing gravity Deacon, you know, like he was just took it down one and then he but I was like, I just told him. I go, no one would have noticed, no, but you could just tell he like, it's interesting to see someone who's so famous and beloved call out this thing that no one would notice if we didn't. Like, you didn't need to tell us she had a cold. You sounded amazing. But I as as a comedian myself, like anytime a joke doesn't go well, I had to be like that was new. I had to like always, or even when I was on stage the other night, Chris was like, you didn't need to say that, because there was supposed to be a five minute like countdown clock, but there was none. And as soon as I looked down to see how much time I had, there was nothing there. And I go, there's supposed to be a countdown clock, but I don't know how much time I have. And then I got offstage and Chris is like, next time, people didn't need to know that. I was like, that's a really good point, Like I need to remember the audience isn't, yeah, isn't backstage they're not like, but you forget that and great performers don't apologize for things they don't need to apologize for. So what you're saying is John is not It's not a great performance. No, I think that, like I. But you know what it shows is that he's a humble and still like doubts himself, and especially in front of all of these legend legendary musicians. I perhaps if it was his own show, he wouldn't have apologized. But I think he knew he was amongst musicians that would maybe notice or something. You know, when I perform in front of comedians, I up it a little bit more. Unfortunately, sometimes when people like real fans will come to your shows though as a musician I've found the elegant, they'll be like sticklers about like you didn't sing it like on the record, you know, like why didn't you sing it like on the record, Because a lot of times you don't, you'll veer away from it, you know, yeah, fun because you're bored. So maybe he's just like people real fans will notice if I'm not singing the note, I usually yeah, no, And you know what I would have noticed. I probably would have noticed. And but but he But I guess my point was like he he sounded amazing with cold like what the fuck? And um, so yeah, that was We just had a brief interaction backstage, but that was it. Um what was my What was I talking about before that? Ye? Teeth? Oh yeah you teeth back to such a major Like I've I've kind of wanted to get veneers before because they are they veneers? Is that what they're called? What you think? So their porcelain veneers. The reason I got them was because as I've aged, my teeth have gotten a little discolored. I've always had this one thing on my front tooth that breaks off every eight years. I have to get it fixed. And I was just like, I don't. And then like braces didn't stick, like they've gotten a little more crooked. And then my dentist is like, you could do in visiline or you could spend a couple grand and just get these four things replaced. And I was like that would have said that. I cannot believe how affordable it was. I can't believe I've been in invisilne since before Trump was president. I'm not kidding. This is such a violent procedure though, yeah it is. Do they fucking grind your teeth down to stillagtites. At one point they go, okay, you're all down, sit up, and you can rent did have it ground down to little knobs? Yes, and you can see they show you see that's the reaction. That's I mean reaction I know that anyone should have. And they avoid your nerves. I was asking the dentists. I'm like, how do you know like that you're avoiding my nerves? She's like, because I went to school for most of my life. I was like, easy, lady, I'm sorry. I wasn't an insult. That's that's what I could see how that would be an annoying question, Like hattie, y'all know what you're doing? No, you know what? I want to know what they're doing in there. They are taking so long to do little things. I'd recently had a tooth procedure, and I'm like, what's he doing up in there? Like there's somebody like different, like whirring sounds, and like, yes, there's like a grind. There was a thing they were chipping off an old filling and it's all of a sudden a rock came shooting out him me and he goes, that's normal. And I go, how about you tell me it's normal before it happens, like a rock might come shooting out of your face. It felt like, and it sounded like you're driving the highway in a semi truck, like flicks a rock into your windshield. That's what it sounded like. It was like flicking around in my mouth, all of us filling just shooting everywhere. And he goes, that's normal, that's normal, And I'm like, it's flight. When pilots don't tell you this turbulence is normal, We're not gonna die, Like, let us know, John Mayer, us, let us know your process, let us know what is happening here, assume that we are going to assume the worst about you even though we're not, and fill us in a little bit on these stars. I would have associated a heads up, like, you know, twenty five minutes in, I'm like, how much longer is this gonna go on? And if she had just told me so, we're gonna be up in here for like twenty eight minutes or thirty minutes like that would have been so nice. Give us a time limit. And now you're scared to ask her questions because she got so defensive about in the nerve question, you hit a nerve clearly, but to not hit them. At one point I stood up. She goes, all right, just rinse. Now, I had no idea that my teeth weren't in yet, and I'm like rinsing, and then I'm feeling and all I feel. Nikki are like, oh my god, imagine like three long drapes of your gums and I'm like feeling these strings. I'm like, what, why is there? Like there's so much stuff still hanging in my mouth behind I think you need to trim my gums. And she's like, oh, your teeth aren't in yet. Okay, I'm just scentists, no wonder they were cheating. She was sorry, this is not okay. No, Like, can I just say come on that people need to know because I did not know this, Because I feel like I've always been to reliable dentists. I've heard multiple stories lately, um about people going to the dentist and needing tons of work done because ben dentists prey on people's people know people. Dentists know that people don't take care of their teeth, and they're shamed of it. So people will wait ten years to go to the dentist. You know, Andrew, I think hadn't been to the dentists in like twenty years, like something like that, because people get ashamed and then they go and they will just don't if you go to the dentists and you need more than two cavities or I would say more than three cavities filled and your teeth aren't hurting, Like if you go in hurting and then they say you have four cavities, Okay, you probably have four cavities. But if you go in for a checkup and your teeth aren't hurting and you get more three or more cavities that they need filled. Second opinion, because there are con artist dentists everywhere. I've run about this and Reddit. I've heard personal experiences of it. Chris is going to come in right now and tell us a personal experience pro tip. As a pro tip pro tip loss, don't go to a brand new dentist. They have tons of student debt. Oh but if you go to a guy that's why do you have me? Go to doctor Bacila's he's like twenty two. He's in a group that of like, he's in a good group. He's a good guy. He's been at pyramid schemes. He's the coolest, he's so good. He's he's totally surfer tennis. He has a surfer voice, and he's Scott Bacula's nephew. He's just like, hey, how's your teeth going today? How are you feeling going today? So yeah, those I mean, I'm not saying that they're all bad, but those dentists that are like young and just out of dental school, they've got tons of debt and they're like, hey, man, if we do a bunch of fillings, that's what I think. That's what happened with the stories that you're doing. Yeah, well there's yeah, there's one story in Saint Louis. But I've i've I think this is something that people don't know about. So they they prey on your shame, you know, like they go, oh my god, this is bad. You listen, and they roll their chair over. Listen, they move the light out of the way. This isn't good. So you've got six cavities on your left side, you got four on the right side, and we've got a couple of go to a second opinion. I'm not I'm not lying to you like they they they know when people are ashamed, and there are bad people out there that are taking advantage. So also I went to two dentists in New York City. They said, okay, you have to get an implant. I got a six thousand dollars implant on the right. And then they go, you have a hairline fracture on this on your other side. You're gonna have to get an implant. Do you want to just do it now? I go, no, I don't have six thousand dollars. I go get a second opinion. That guy goes, you do have a hairline fracture, but you don't yet need an implant, but you will. Then I go to this guy a couple of years later, and he goes, you have no hairline fracture. It's fine, you do not and will not I need an implant. Let's all just get second opinions for fucking everything. I mean, that's that's the name of the game. I've never done that in my life. I just take I just always defer that I'm an idiot, and everyone knows better be especially doctors who are fucking egomaniacs. You have to be kind of sociopathic and you know, just like they just kind of look at bodies like they cut into bodies, like especially surgeons. They surgeons. That's why um sociopathy is kind of beneficial to society because we need people that can like cut into a body and not feel anything or feel remorse or like deal with people dying on them. Babe, before you leave, I got you some sugar. He hates them, but sometimes when I want intimacy with him, I'll go give me some sugar. And he loves it but hates it. But today I got you a chocolate croissant. Yeah, because I know you did. Yeah, yeah, enjoy it. If you don't like it, just give it to someone who does. You know, I hope you have the greatest day. They hear it. Wait, he loves you when he thinks you were wonderful. Thank you. I've heard about He didn't even see my teeth. I'm just kidding. He didn't say that. Should I shave off my incisors because I've heard that it gives them more youthful appearance. What are they called, Nikki la incisors? Because your first four teeth are all incisors. I looked it up. Now, your lateral incisors are the ones next to your front teeth. Two buddies on the side, the little two little henchmen, And I think, yeah, can make them a little maybe like a hairline shorter. Yeah, but that's so exciting to have a new fresh set of teeth. Like it's really whenever I get my teeth whitened, it's such a boost. When I just got some like gaps filled in and my teeth and it was like, oh yeah, just like yeah, because when I would smile, there would be I just have, um it's not like a gap, but it's like my molars come together and they make like a cave and it's called the black triangles. And it was so funny because I was telling my surf I was telling my surf or Dennis when he was like, how your teeth, you know, hanging loose, And I was like, yeah, there's like there's just when I smile sometimes it looks like I have like food in my back molars and these like at the very top it looks like a little poppy seed. And he was like, oh, yeah, maybe we'll scrape up something in the stain that didn't work, Okay, we'll knock out this filling and refill it because the filling looks stained. That didn't work, and I go, it's not a stain, it's a fucking shadow because it's a cave. It's like a little cave hole. And so he goes, oh, black triangle. Oh yeah, he goes, usually we yeah, we we have a process for filling those in, but it's usually the front teeth, not on the sides. And I was like, he's like, I've never done on the side. I was like, I'll be the guinea pig. Fill those pitches up and so now it doesn't look like I have food in my teeth anymore. Which was the thing that bugged me all the time. Why couldn't you figure that out on the first try? Why did you have to go through all these procedures. I can't say procedures because it was a nice fucking he caught a wave that morning and what it was, what it was it called when it's like a nice uh what is it called when when they're like the ocean's good for serving a nar wave? You caught an there's a good swell. There's a good swell or something I don't yeah, a sweet swell. Yeah, I'm reading this book about um uh, it's really fascinating. Hold on, what's the name of it. I'm reading it slowly. I am going to read more than a third of it. The book I do want to update you all. The book about um adult children of emotionally mature parents. I've only read. I stopping at half because I got it. It's just repeating itself now, but I got it, and it's unread the last like a couple of pages, just so you get the drift of the end. Sho dies. Yeah, it's me from loneliness because my heard's from um. No, you're right, maybe I should, but it's just repeating the same stuff, and it's I hate books that. First of all, let me just say another strong opinion. I have no more forwards, no more prologs. I don't care about reading. I've already said this before it bears repeating. I don't need to hear a bunch of people who didn't write the book tell me how good your book is. I bought it already. I don't need to read someone famous who I don't even fucking now. I'm fucking Michael Rochio about this person that's my voice teacher who didn't know who I was. I don't know whoever it is that you got to write your forward that's so impressive saying how great you are. I paid to read your book, and then I don't want to read about all your thank you is about who helped you along the process, how this book came to be. Save that for the end when I give a shit, because I've just read the book and I want to know what's the genesis of this book. Don't forwards need to be shorter. I don't need to see. I don't need to see you think every colleague and every all your I don't need you. If you're a psychologist writing a book, spare me the bullshit about thank you to all my clients who provided case studies and were so vulnerable and offered me your time and compet like, shut up, you're a doctor. You used your patients. They did sign a release. Maybe you're using fake names. We know that. Shut up. We don't care. We just want to hear the data. But this book, it just goes. This is another thing annoying in these psychology books. They'll go there are three types of emotionally avoidant parents, and then they'll tell you each one of them and then they have to take you through each I guess what my point is is, I just want I want to know what I can do about it. Like all they do in this book. What I thought it was gonna be was like, if you have emotionally your parents, this is how it shows up in your relationships, and here's what you can do about it. Instead, the whole book is just like, here's how to not here's how to not be an emotionally avoidant parent or immature parent. First of it, it helps you identify you had them, and then all of a sudden, it's like, this is this is what they do, and you go, yeah, I know, I lived it. And then they go, well, here's here's how the here's how your parents got that way. It's like, I don't give a fuck. I already forgave them, like teach me how to live. And you're also they're assuming that you're going to have children. Yes, maybe that's it that annoys me. But I'm reading this new book that I um actually think is gonna help me a lot, even though I know I've said this about a bunch of books, but it can't hurt. And once it loads. It's called the Art of Impossible by Stephen Cotler. Kot Ler Stephen with a v The Art of Impossible, and it's really fascinating and um it talks about how he used to he was a journalist that was following people who would be in the X Games, and these people that were doing like death defying stunts like the X Games. When it started, people were like, you can't do fucking fourteen one hundred degree spin on a half pipe or whatever. Like they were doing things that like no one could ever imagine a human could do, and they were doing it. And he was like, this is so fascinating that this is constantly happening. I'm seeing the impossible being achieved by people that had would not you would never think science would not even think this is possible. And then he pretty much gives you a step by step which is not easy to follow by any means, Like this takes a lot of work. But if you want to do the impossible, if you have like a goal that seems impossible, there is a way to do it. And it's a perfect mixture of hold on, let me look at my bookmark really quick. It's a perfect mixture of autonomy. They found that people when they're told to work on something. If you're at work and you're told you gotta you have this deadline, you gotta have this in you'll get the work done, but you're not going to glean from that work. Well, what you as much as if you're not going to like improve your yourself, is not going to improve from doing that work. But if you are left to your own devices and told, like do whatever you want with this time, you will get so much more out of that. So companies have like really used autonomy because they know it's more productive. So it's really interesting three m you know that makes tape and stuff. They were the first people to say to their In nineteen forty eight, they implemented this system where they allowed their employees fifteen percent of their day they can do whatever they want, work towards a project that they're passionate about, and which then led to the development of the post it note. So they did the math on it, and they go, okay, well, fifteen percent of their income in nineteen forty eight, and until nineteen seventy three was like a billion dollars or something like fifteen percent of like their revenue was spent on paying people to do nothing for their for three m right, it was just their personal development, but it led to innovation, multi billion dollar idea. And so Apple has done this, Facebook has done this, Google does this. They all have this thing of like during your eight hour work day, fifteen percent of that time is devoted to autonomy, whatever you want to do and if you're like I want to spend it on Instagram, No, it's supposed to be like it's supposed to be work, you know, it's supposed to be like a passion project, like something that you're passionate about. So um, but it's it's a mixture of autonomy. So doing something that you care about mastery and flow and mastery is really hard because you need to constantly be pushing yourself slightly. Like if you want if I want to improve singing and songwriting or playing music, I always have to be working on a song that's a slightly above of my level of being able to play. Not a lot, it's a it's a very fine window. So if you want to improve in things, if you go too far, you're gonna hit a wall and you're gonna stop improving. Always slightly better. Because the human brain gets huge shoots of dopamine when you are rewarded for learning something new, and like we are constantly in search of dopamine. That's what makes us, that is what. So what this book is all about is like triggering motivation, because if you have motivation, you'll fucking do the work. And so to trigger motivation, you have to have dopamine, and dopamine gets set off and nor pronephron and all those good feeling things get set off when you slightly challenge yourself and you have little tiny winds. And so this book kind of outlines how to perfectly reach a flow state, and a lot of it had to do also with like you have to exercise. You have to like literally move your body and exercise, and you have to get into a flow state, which a lot of times surfing can I don't know. He was talking about how surfing causes that because it takes focus, but also your mind is I don't I've never had I don't think I've been in a flow state before. Jiu jitsu. Yeah, you get in flow. Oh yeah, it's like this like meditative state when you're just kind of like like you have this like tunnel vision where you're so like in the moment and those little winds and stuff that happens too in the sport. It's like, wow, so cool. Have you skied Nikki? Yes, I get I definitely feel it in skiing. You're right, like, skiing is my favorite feeling. When I'm going down mountain by myself as fast as I can, trying a little. He compares it to skiing too, actually, because he's like, I try something new, I'm alone on the mountain, I'm alone in my head, Like it's just Skiing's the best fucking feeling. But this is what he says to really harness mastery as a motivator, which mastery is the hardest motivator there is. But if you get mastery down and you're mastering, like that's where you see the most growth. He says, take the fifteen percent of your life that you've carved it out for yourself. So fifteen percent of your week is usually one afternoon. It's a four hour block, So four hours of your week and you can or no five hours. I'm sorry. You either do a five hour chunk once a week or you split it into two two and a half hours. I don't think you can do five separate hours. So it's two and a half and two and a half or five altogether. Carve that out for yourself, call it your autonomy time, and spend it pushing on the challenge skills balance, which the challenge skills balance is what I just talked about of like slightly challenging, like you're learning a new skill that's not completely but you're going to feel a reward when you get there because you will get there because it's not too challenging, trying to get a little better at something that's aligned. And this is what else you would need to have. You have to have curiosity be about where you're pursuing, because without that you will you will not keep going. So you have to be curious about what you're pursuing, passionate. And it has to have a purpose. So you can't just want to write a book because I have a story to tell. Your story has to have a purpose to change the world. There has to be a purpose behind what you want to do. If you want to write songs like, it just can't be my Like your purpose could be to make money and become famous, but that's not going to get you far your If your purpose is to change the world in some way and even in some small way, but outside of yourself, you're going to also achieve so much more than if you are just keeping it to like your own personal goals. So this book is really fascinating, and um, I hope people read it if if I've inspired them at all, Let's go to break and come back with um some pantos. All right, it's time for fan thrust and let's just get to final thought. Let's do it. Oh, I've missed obvious voice and I've missed our listeners voices. Let's hear what they have to say. Okay, let's start off with Amanda. Hey, guys, I wanted to get your opinion on this because I feel like Nikki would have a strong, one strong opinion. There's a girl, Shanna Ray. I'm sure you've seen videos on YouTube or TikTok or whatever, I guess you. How to show has a show on TLC and she had cancer, some sort of tumor in her pratuitary gland and she wasn't child to like mature girl. So she looks like an eight year old girl, sounds like an eight year old girl, but she's twenty three years old. And this full grown like adult man found the show or saw the show and liked her and said her flowers and all this stuff. I don't know, but they're dating and I don't gonna feel about it, but I have to look it up. It's fucking freaking me out, and I feel like he's probably a pedophile. But this is like the perfect loophole, you know, I don't know, what do you think? It is a perfect good jack off? Yeah, okay, now you know how I feel at the end of every episode. It's really hard to come up with jay things. So thank you for that. Um, what is this listener's name again, Amanda, Amanda, thank you so much for this. Yeah, this is an interesting story. You're I think you're gonna I'm gonna surprise you here and say that I'm okay with it because I've watched a lot of this girl's clips and she comes across to me very much like an adult with just a child's voice, and that looks like a child, but like her essence to me is so adult that she's maybe more adult than like a lot of fully grown women I see that like do talk like this and are just like, I'm a wait, a baby girl, Like she's more autonomous and like knows who she is more and especially given that she has that affliction, I think or that whatever thing with her petunity Terry Glynn that I think that she's probably a cooler person and more mature because she's had to deal with such scrutiny probably her whole life. And I think this guy and I trust her to snuff out who wants to date her because she looks like a child and who doesn't because she's probably been dealing with this her whole life or her whole adult life. Really, but I do first of all, yes, spidy sense goes off and you go why, I mean same with Mail and guy in acologists. Why why do you want this above anything else? And I feel like I saw some clip where he was drawn to her because of her personality, and I trusted him and I believed him, although I do think they are broken up now, Noah, do we have any update that you can find about their status. Let me just see a travel blogger who is accused of being creepy for dating a twenty three year old woman who looks like an eight year old girl has given an update on the pairs relationship. Swiggert the guy recently shared several snaps on right whatever. Okay, so what's the update here? He said, they're better off his friends. Yeah, we are just good friends. We're getting to know each other. But I think it's absolutely disgusting the attitude of some people. She's been through so much in life. She survived cancer as a child, She's always felt different, was treated by society, and her pussy does not feel like an eight year old. I you know, it sucks for this girl because, yeah, anyone she dates is going to look suspicious, and I think I wanna I want her to be able to have all the things that I have as an adult woman in life, So I wanna be air on the side of like, I'm gonna trust her to find someone that's not a pedophile. But yeah, it doesn't It doesn't look great if she chose a child to exactly like she's supposed to be alone her whole So is the other thing. She's like, let me please, you guys, just date someone that looks like I'm gonna date an eight year old And then he'd be like, oh, that looks better. And if you she just looks like an adult woman shrunk down, she doesn't, you know, she doesn't look like a little person, because little people have like definite different features that make them look like little people. But she looks like there's adultness to her. Um, do you think her skin ages? Do you? I mean, like, do you think she because she's small and she has like almost like her skull shape has not taken that of an adult. So she's like a child's probably skull. But the amount of I think just then of college and leaves our body. Yeah, so she's probably losing that, but maybe she's not because her body thinks she's eight quickly, because your pituitary gland regulates aging, doesn't it. Yes, So how do we stunt that for all of us? Yeah, the last of us. We should use her blood and rub it all over us. This girl, shouldn't We get her to the fireflies as quickly as possible. That's the last of us. Are Jaylo's already on it? Oh yeah, yeah, she probably watch out girls shot array. Jlo will be harvesting you're lately themselves. God. Um, yeah, I can't. By the way, that fucking Ben Affleck commercial super Bowl commercial where he works the drive through? Can we give credit where credit is due? David Letterman did that first? Go look it up YouTube. David Letterman used to be at the McDonald's and Taco Bell drive throughs and people would order and then they'd see David Letterman. It was hilarious and it annoys me that they stole that idea. And there Bob did it, like Albert Brooks's brother by him. Can't I remember his name? He's on Curb Your Enthusiasm. He died Bob? Oh, yeah, what's yeah? Yeah, yeah he did that. Didn't he do that on Dave? I don't know. Yeah, he used to do stuff like that too, But yeah, it really bugged me watching the commerce, I'm like, they just ripped off another comedy bit and it's just they gross me out. But that's my opinion, not knowing them at all. But you know, I think we all know. Okay, let's get to the next caller. Okay, let's give Peyton some advice. Hello everyone, Um, this is my third time trying to get this done in less than ninety seconds, so I'm going he just jump right into it. My brother measures me saying that he can only r s VP for himself from my wedding in March. That is correct, because I asked him multiple times whether or not he was going to bring his boyfriend, and I received no response. My brother rarely texts or calls back unless he needs something, which is typically money. The wedding is going to be small and family only and is less than thirty people. No one in my family other than my mother and I know that he's gay or even in a committed relationship. My family also thinks of my brother as the golden child that can do no wrong, but they are also the typical backwood Appalachis that people would expect from southern West Virginia. Is it shitty of me to not want my brother to come out to our entire family on my wedding day? Or like, what should I do? Let me know? Also, Nicky, I am very excited to see you in Lexington, Kentucky in less in a month. This will be my person first week at the show and I'm very excited and listened to for a very long time. Thanks. Thanks girl, And how cool? I mean, what an interesting question? Yeah, this is a hard one I'm gonna go with. Man, I know I can't relate to weddings being a special day like how that? Like I think I can relate to this like if my sister wanted to go, if my sister got engaged at my comedy special, my first comedy special taping or something like, I'm trying to relate it to my own life of like this is my night and you're doing your thing. But getting engaged is the same as coming out, So that's tough too, Okay, my sister comes out, Like if someone wanted to come out. I feel that your brother sounds like he's very angry with your family, Like if he doesn't get back to things, and he feels like and he seems like he's probably not operating on a level that functioning human would operate. If he's not getting back to tex he's asking you for money and stuff. Might be all from the fact that he has had to hide who he is within your larger family and within your you know, culture growing up in West Virginia. So my instinct is like throw him a bull, like maybe him being able to come out will be will like make him a better brother and like U. But at the same time, you only get one wedding, you know, if it goes well, So maybe there's some kind of middle ground where he can come out. Maybe maybe the wedding ceremony, boyfriend not there. I've skipped a wedding ceremony where my boyfriend went because it was just family and his cat like and like. And then I went down a massage and then I joined them for the reception later. Maybe the boyfriend shows up at the reception. By that time, you've had your glory of getting married. It's time for you to just be on the dance floor and party anyway. It's not You're not even going to notice the attention is not on you. Something like that, or maybe or maybe offering to you know, support him in some way to facilitate him coming out in different way with your family in a different time, but hold his hand through it and support him and offer your like love and support in and figuring out the best way to do that. That isn't Your wedding day might be good, but this sounds like a really tough situation. And I do not and be the position you're in. So what do you guys think? I am maybe being like neurodivergent on you're getting married with a small wedding. What do you think can I come out are your wedding? Yeah? I mean I have questions for this woman. If she was here, I'd ask follow ups like is it more important that your brother comes out to you or is it more important that you know how many people are coming to your wedding? Because that was confusing. It sounds like she wants RSVPs. No, it sounds like it's it sounds like there's a she needs to find out if he wants to bring his partner or not. It sounds like he's probably has gotten back to her about like, yes, you do what to bring a partner? And now the issue it started out, it sounded like it was about like how many people. I think the real issue is does my brother come out at my wedding or not? I would say it's to be a big deal. Lay off, just say I mean, it doesn't matter like he's gonna come out when it's his it's his journey. But if he brings her boyfriend to her wedding, it's a coming. It's coming out, so everyone will see it. So it's your it's your wedding day. She want this spotlight taken off herself. I'm so confused. Yeah, which I don't think is a bad thing to feel, Like nobody if you're gay in West Virginia. I'm sorry, it's still a little bit backwards there. That's what it's like. It's like her family is still it's going to be the bad day. She's saying this, I don't want my brother to come out at my wedding. I'm having she's saying, she's like if she's if it's like selfish of her to have those feelings of like, I kind of don't want my brother to come out of my wedding because it's gonna pull for allowed to have any feelings you want. But like, beyond that, what is she really asking us is that he's asking us if it's okay for her to tell her brother don't come out at my wedding yet, because it's just it's got too much of a big deal and this is my day. It's totally okay, Okay. I completely misunderstood, Thank you. I thought she was like, but do you want why that would be hard to tell your brother, like, especially given that he has spent his whole life closeted, probably with her family to be like yourself one more event, yes, of course. But if you were getting a woman, it would be no issue and you could she for your new girlfriend, but so passive. She's being so indirect, like even I didn't understand what she's saying, what she really wants to say. She's like cloaking theft. Fuck no, I can't, Well, yeah, she's I can't think she's been I think she's ashamed of this feeling that she's having that she doesn't want to share this day with her brother's very important day of coming out, which obviously she acknowledges the importance of that, and she loves her brother and wants him to have that. I don't think this is her being like, stay closeted. I don't want anyone to know you're gay. It's like I don't want them to know I don't want them to find out you're gay today. But it sounds reluctant to even see. So it doesn't sound like she doesn't want to share the day. And I think a little bit harping on what Nikki said, there's nothing wrong with saying I don't want some form of drama to happen at the wedding. I've spent a lot of time planning it, and I want it the day to go like this. However, I do want to support you and I want to be there to hold your hand through this moment and to introduce your boyfriend to the family. Sometimes there's like a pre event dinner, why don't you invite him to that, or some kind of family affair that happens before the wedding, So then that way, at your wedding it could be a harmonious event and hopefully even you're what does she say, like her backwoods family or whatever, will take some curiosity and use that as like a being event to not only celebrate you, but get to know your brother in this new way, new light in their world and his boyfriend. That's why it's you know, And now I'm coming at it from the brother's angle of like this this weekend I got, you know, I was doing this event at the rock and roll event I did, and there's these I'm trying to, you know, win over this crowd and five minutes and I said something before the show, I was like talking to the producers of the thing, and I was like, I'm a little nervous about what material to do, and They're like, we just want you to like kind of the action is happening right after you go on, so maybe like kind of just like make fun of how they're all rich, tell them to like fucking and I go, yeah, I'll be like, you know, I know you guys are rich and you're you got rich because you're greedy motherfucker's but like tonight it's not that night to be greedy. We all know how you voted, you know, like I just said that. I was just like riffing of like what like And then this guy took me aside, like was like, really rich guy who's like part of the event, was like, I know your act political stuff isn't going to work with this crowd. And I go, well, you don't know my act because I don't do political jokes. You just heard me like say that off the hand, so you're acting like you've like familiar with me. But I mean I didn't say this, But I go, you, well, you don't know my act because I don't do anything political like ever. I was just you know, say, and I tell you the second he told me not to fucking say something about voting, I was five like the second you feel oppressed for something you know is right, and the second you feel like, don't upset Trump people, I mean that if that whenever I get told tiptoe around Trumper's feelings. I mean, the party of fuck your feelings, and then I have to tiptoe around their feelings. I fucking get enraged and I want to throw my whole set. I mean, I want to do all I want to go. I want to I want to go the other way, and I feel it's all related to that injustice of like I just of I'm not going to let these people who like I don't want to cater to their good time when they are on the wrong side of things, so I don't want so I could see your brother being like, I'm so angry that I have to pretend I'm something other than I am because these people are so close minded and I have to do it one more fucking night because my sister doesn't want to share it, like I could see. And I could also see how he's a loose cannon and you telling him the truth, which is I'd rather do it another time, which is so fine for you to say, and I believe the way I would feel as well. I could see how that would be terrifying because he could have that reaction that I had, which is like, oh, another fucking injustice another time, I have to keep my mouth shut. Well, I'm gonna then when they say does anyone want to object to this wedding, I'm going to stand up and go. I'm get you know, like I could see it going. I could see how tricky this is. And I don't think I offered any solutions. But I is it too late? Like did she already invite him with a plus? I mean I think she said this was a month ago. So I bet you we're going to find out in Lexington. I hope she gets a meet and greet. If you hear this, come talk to us, honey, go to the merch booth, get a meet and greet, and then tell us what happened. Because this is a month after you left the message, so something has happened in this time. And I'll see you in Lexington on Saturday to get the details. Okay, we have to go. Great fan Trexes, keep leaving messages. You can find them on our Instagram in the link. UM, thank you guys for listening this week. We'll see you this weekend in Bloomington, Indiana. That is going to be tomorrow night Thursday. Then um Newport, Kentucky, which is pretty much Cincinnati is going to be Friday night and then and my dad is also going to be on that show, so that's gonna be really fun. And then Saturday will be in Lexington, Kentucky. So very excited and we'll get answers to what happened with that guy. Um, a girl's brother and her wedding. Um, thanks for listening, Anya. Are your teeth gonna be normal next week? I know it'll be like three weeks. Well, but I look awards to that update. I don't know. I don't know when you're having the when you're having them, like the chickolate feeling removed. I don't know if I can for like a while, like I don't want them because I have to live with these temporaries for a week. Then I'll shave them down again and make some adjustments, and then they send it to a fucking lab for three weeks. Yeah, it takes forever. That That's why I asked. I didn't assume it would be anytime soon, but it's I'm still worth it, and I think that look amazing, as I've told you a million times, like I'm thinking about getting it too, because it's so it just looks And now you can have whatever teeth you want, and you're and they are big enough that you can now make them perfectly what you want them to be. Like they're get off too much, you can't get it back. You won't though you won't. Okay. Did you feel like this when you got your vocal cord surgery? Like what if I consolutely? I felt like this when I got lasick, like I can't go back to having blurry vision? Who would want to? But there was something about, like, I don't know if people relate to this when you you know, when even when Kursen got her in Visiline, she had like moved on and learned straight. She was like, I miss in Visiline. I want those back, like you want you just want The other day you were kind of depressed, and I go, I think it's because you just are getting rid of your teeth that you've had your entire life my teeth. Yeah, it's grief. I mean, your your teeth, the old teeth are gone forever. And there's someone I'm doing. I'll just be like I'm grieving my teeth. Yeah. I grieve hair. When I lose one strand of hair, I go, this has been with me for four years. I look at it, I go, it's a half an inch a month at most. And I go, that's that's fucking two years that this thing. And I go, I'm I get sad, so it makes total sense, but I'm excited to see your smile as it evolves. All Right, we gotta go. Thank you guys for listening. Don't be cooked and just shaved out your teeth