#281 Stuck In An Origin Story

Published Oct 18, 2022, 1:00 AM

Nikki and Producer Noa recap their weekend in Denver hanging out, talking too much and seeing the band Metric. Andrew went to see his buddy musician Jake Owen. Luckily he did not leave the concert with a beer can bruise or a new tattoo.  Nikki and Andrew try to guess the plot of a movie they've never seen, have a debate about asking for free tickets to shows, Noa tells a story about meeting a Bestie at the airport and Nikki almost at an "Uncrustable" off the ground. In Top1 Bottom1 they talk about items in the Hudson News convenience stores.

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The Nicky Glaiser podcast. Er, here's Nicky. Hello here, I am welcome to the show. It's Nicki Laser podcast. It's Monday. Welcome. I'm here in St. Louis with Andrew. Noah is in Arizona. Coming off a big weekend of traveling with Noah in Denver, we went to visit my friend Cat Um, who's my best friend from um my first year, my only year at the University of Colorado. We met there. She's been on the podcast before and Um Yeah. We went to her house. She has a baby her she has a son too, but he was on a camping trip with her his dad, so we had the house to ourselves, us ladies with her baby girl, Lydia, who is so cute. And then we Um. She got a sitter for Friday night and Saturday night, so we got to go out. Friday night, we got into town, we went out to dinner, and then Saturday night and we stayed up talking like all night long, in for an areas. Talked at dinner, close that down, talked in the cat living room, closed that down, and then when then we're I was like, I gotta go to bed, and then washed our face came back in Cat's room, talked on the bed, closed that down. It was like so much sleeping on this girl. Oh I yeah, I was a little sleep deprived when I came back, especially I got a late or early early flight on Sunday. But Saturday we went to go see Um. Saturday we went shopping all day and then no, it just wasn't the vibe. I'm we had a baby with us. It's always vibe. I mean the thing was um Lydia the baby's babysitter. So Cat got a new babysitter. It was like the first time she was using this woman from UM, a friend of hers, and I call her a girl, but she's she's a woman. And when I said woman, I was like, no, she's a girl, but she's definitely she's like graduated in two thousand fourteen. I know that because guess where she graduated from Columba. Cat was like, you're not going to believe this. Uh you know, Chris was surnamed Christie Um Cindy. Cindy Cindy went to column did By the time we would get home from these dinners of talking, I was just like, I just want to not talk anymore. Being like a babysitter and this woman what happened that they were so over when she came over. We got home from the airport or dinner the first night and we met Cindy, and then Cindy was coming back the next day to babysit and I was like, just be ready for a lot of Columbine questions because it Kat had already prepared her and told her we were Columbine heads and like tested the waters first. Cindy didn't mind. She was the last graduating class with um uh Principal d Mr d who was like the principal at Columbine when it happened, And so she was the last class because he said that he wanted to retire after every I don't know why. I'm I'm like all right enough, oh no, yea. So he wanted to be there. I can't stop pointing with a gun hand I swear, um, it's for safety. So he wanted to be there for every everyone that was in the Columbine school system at that time. He wanted to make sure he graduate. He left after, so she was in pre She was the first preschool class during Columbine and then I can't believe she's like an adult woman now that has like step kids and stuff. I'm like, I thought she was going to be like, oh she went to Columbine, she must be like a team and she's like a woman. It makes me feel I am so old. It's so weird to see like kids that were in preschool when you were graduating high school and they have kids now. People are like, it always amazes me when you're born after two thousand and you can drink yes, and and children then too. I mean they're it's it's nuts, um, but it is nice to know that, um, yeah, you can have Because of Hillary swaink having kids at forty eight, now I can know I can wait until forty eight years old to everyone out. I mean, how many who did you have a kid with she's having I mean it's definitely in future because she's having twins at forty eight. But like there is an air of like, you're telling us this a little too soon. They're they're they're doing out one. I'm sorry, they're doing in April. So how many months are way? Is that? She just announced last week? Four five, six, six months, so she's three months in. Is that's when you can start telling people, even if you're forty eight with twins. I don't know if they fight each other, if one eat the other one, because like a million dollar baby, are you thinking like boxing? No, I just heard of twins eating the other twins. I just know her head hits a stool in that movie. That's all I know about it. The like, we should do a thing sometimes where we just the same movies I've never seen, and I can tell you enough references. I think at that too. Yeah, yeah, give us any movie. Noah, let's see if we can break down what the plot is movie. You think we haven't seen um Dog Day Afternoon, Day Afternoon because I don't. I know a very little bit about it, but I would like to think that it was just about a dog. I'm gonna say Vietnam. I like to think of it as a dog who is alone in the house. You gotta get this right in the afternoon. That's a really cute comic. Stran. I would love the Sunday comic Dog Day Afternoon. It's just a dog that gets left home. He has a gun. He doesn't have to have you always have a gun. No, Yeah, well he has PTSD. He's Italian, Okay, the Italian dog. Okay, afternoon, you go you break it down. Honestly, I think um it is uh. I think that maybe um who's in it? God dogged? I don't know why to pick this one. I want to say, but it's not him because that was the one Good Morning Vietnam. But I think it's around that kind of I thought I was born again Vietnam in my mind. That's what I was thinking. Oh you're do you gonna give you the summary? Well, okay, okay, dogs about I know it's about war, so I would say Vieta. But what were you going to say? I feel like a dog day afternoon. They it's towards the end of the war. They think they're getting out, you know, maybe like three and her friends have already been killed. Me to say what date of this movie, I'm going to say World War One, Vietnam was seventy seven. Ship okay, so I don't think it was like eight one. I'm gonna say what were we in eight one? I'm gonna say the movie came out in one. But it's about Vietnam. It could be about any time. It might be about Vietnam. So we're in Vietnam. There's four guys. There's lots of mud splashing everywhere, and like there's rain coming up from the ground. Oh yes, that was Forrest. Now we're just describing. There's a Okay, what happens in Dog Day Afternoon? Who is in it? Wait? Can I guess that um Richard Dreyfus is in it? Richard Richard gear thinking? Maybe? No, I'm thinking dry Fuss, but I don't think he's Like, why does dry Fuss? I always think of Dan Druff. I don't know why Dr Flakes. Maybe that's I just see a lot of Dan Dreff on his shoulders. Okay, what do you know about Doug? Okay, who's in it? Al Pacino? Yeah, that right, I saw it last night. Well, actually, you're both really really far away from what the plot is. The movie is about um an attempted robbery for the first Brooklyn Savings Bank, and it's based on a true story. It's no war. I could have swore as a war too. Let's do another one. Let's do another one. That was okay, I'll give you another one. I'll give you one unless you have one. Noah, have you seen Fight Club? Yes? Yeah, although I couldn't describe it less with that. But there's some movie I watch I still couldn't describe it. I still never really understood it. It's like Memento. I tried to watch. Oh yeah, I got through. Like my friends were so into that in high school, and I just couldn't really fight Club. It was the same genre. It was kind of to like that movie, like thinking, yeah, um, what's a movie that I never saw, Um, something like Casablanca or something, but I didn't see that. Yeah, um, what was one that I almost watched? Apocalypse? Now I kind of know that one. Well, I know it's like red Button, Like there's a sled that's called like Rosebud or something like that. I might be thinking of a difference. And then there's a card from So there's a card game because I know when I met Charlie Sheen he had a card from it. And there's it was even that long after the war when you think about it, when well to process probs, you know, um, I guess hurt Locker was kind of so we went to go see metrics the let me guess the film are, Yeah, guess what it was about. I guess what that concert was about. Robin Williams board again. We went to Filmore. I went to the film More to see Dave Chappelle by myself in two thous three, and I cannot find any evidence of that concert online. It's so weird when you searched something online that you know happened in the two thousand's and there's it was a huge event and there's no evidence. If if someone is a better internet sleuth than me, if you can find any before Dave Chappelle going to the film or in two thousand, what do you mean? Well, they claimed me went crazy when he went to Africa. After this was before Chappelle's show. I want to go see him because I knew him from You've Got Mail. I just I decided I was going to try outstand up. I signed up for that thing. I've never done it before, but I was like, I gotta go see stand up. So I googled stand up shows and then it was Dave Chappelle and I then I I amd beat him and I was like, that's the funny guy from You've Got Mail who I loved it. I had never seen it, but yes, it was so You've Got So I took a bus by myself from Boulder to Denver in the bitter cold to go see Dave Chapelle. And it was like a fever dream. And there's no evidence there's a bus. Yes, and how old at this? Yeah? So this is like your taste of stand up is Dave Chappelle at the film? Yes? And it was not a standard like it was. I remember walking in. I was probably one of the only white people there. I don't want to say only because I don't, but I did that. I realized quickly like, oh, this isn't But I was already so adamant on like I'm going alone. So I had overcome so much to even go alone. So by the time I got there and I was like out of the place, out of place, I was just like I didn't care at all. It was already like I'd already conquered the fear. It's like going bungee jumping and then seeing an alligator on your way down there and going like, Okay, I'm already got past my fear. Not that a room of black people's an alligator. Hey, look that's a white person Jewish person. But you know what I mean, Like it could have been a it could have I could have gotten there, and I just thought it was gonna be watching a show a stand up comedian. It wasn't about that there was a bunch of it was all black people. It was just because it was like everyone was dancing. It was like a dance club, Like is that what you're saying? And it was like, oh, I wrestled them alligators. No, I got there, but everyone I remember seeing on stage he was um. They were like women on everyone's on It was like a DJ. I mean, it was like Dave Chapelle block party, but it was like before he was doing those I couldn't even believe it. So it was not a classical stand up show. And what did you What was your feeling seeing it? Didn't make you want to do a standing room only? No, I I just remember being entertained. But I just was like this, I know, this isn't what I am watching online when I type in stand up, like, this is different. But it was so fun because this these um, this group of friends was like I saw me alone and they like were like, come join us, and so I got to hang out with this whole group that noticed that I was awkwardly by myself, and it was so nice. But I don't remember anything from the show. All I can remember is seeing people dancing on stage. It's like it's like a fever dream. I don't even I can't believe I don't remember any comedy happening anything. Sometimes I feel like we add like things like it was like you know what I mean, like and find it online and I'm like did this happen? But it did. I even Kat remembers me going about myself to it. So anyway, so you went to Metric the film Moore. When you walk in, you get nostalgia at all, Like, yeah, I was like, Okay, this is the space I saw him for like that, I recognized the whole area I was. I was so shocked though that place holds you know, thirty n people and I'm like, Dave Chappelle was selling out thirty nine hundred seats before Chappelle show God damn it in Denver on HBO at that time. Yeah. Maybe I don't know, but it was just I mean, this was so long ago. I was just like, damn, but the venue is amazing. No, what did you think? I was? I thought that was such a cool space. So I had such a great time. Um and we were standing in the g A section. And at first when I was walking in because we got there like right as Metric was about to go on stage, I had this feeling like, oh man, we're gonna have to like push through the crowd and it's gonna like I associated with the metal show where people like go crazy, but the audience was so tame. Everyone like kind of um had their own space and they just danced and stuff and um, it was a really great production. Who behaved yourself? You're right though, like I was kind of I was totally fine because I didn't care about getting up close. I had given up that dream of you know, there's a part of me that was like it would have been really cool to be up close because everyone was so respectful and gave everyone in their space. But like Cat and um, Cat does not care about like weaving her way through to like and then and and it was like three girls weaving their way through. When I'm at a concert and I see people like getting get in front of me acting like they have somewhere to go, like it's like I can understand one person because I, oh, that person went to the bathroom. They're finding their friends again. But when it's three girls just being like, we want to be closer, and just like I couldn't. I told no, one can't I go, I can't weave. Leave me back here, you guys go, and then I will come singularly like I'm a girl trying to get back to her seat, but I Am not going to be a part of this because then it makes girls look bad. It makes us look like twats. It makes it represents millennial women like we're twats who are just like I just serve to be up here. But like it was like a line. I have trouble with a weave. I have trouble like tapping a shoulder going on, And then they look at you like, no, I'm going up there, and they're like why are you going up there? Like they give you a look like why do you deserve it? And it's like I don't deserve it. I don't know. And then I instantly just want to get there earlier if you want me up close, as I don't want to be there. I don't want to be on a front row of a show. I mean maybe that's close to that. I mean this was going like even three quarters of the wait, Like no, a quarter of the way up. Um. It was a great spot, but it was just like I I have and my friend Cat is not a rude person. Let me just say that. She's not someone who's like I thinks she deserves things. She's just as insecure as all of us. But there was something about that. I was like, I don't have that ship in me that can but you need a leader. Like but if let's say I have v I P tickets, Oh, I am getting through. If I have somewhere to being, I have a right to be there, and that's the only way to get through. Fine, But like if I'm just and I want to be up close. One of my favorite things is we my little brother was like dating an understudy of a Broadway play person and me and my mom went to the show and we went to go backstage because like she was letting those back, and the guy with the red red or whatever bro was like excuse me, and my mom was like, where with the understand? Like she said it in a way where it's like looking at it's like part of me was like god, mom, but the other party was like so happy to see her take an initiative, but also like no one's impressure with the under study. The understudy is embarrassed that she's under that's a that's a scary thing to be an understudio on a Broadway show. I feel like, ready, no, I think it would be great because you you're that's that's a big deal. I think. I don't think it's embarrassing at all or nerve racking. I really don't. I think I think it's like a big deal. But you know what's the worst part of it is when people go and you're the understudy for the role of the person who's a famous person in the play Boy, people are full of disappointment when you walk out there instead of I forgot what her name was Letter. Yeah, she was UNDERSTAFD for leeting mister. Yeah. That was during Gossip Girl time too, I bet, and people were like after yeah, yeah, yeah, if they come and they that's like, yeah, that's the person she was meeting Lester. Yeah, she was meeting Leaster. My mom, do you remember the play There was a guy back there. I think he's the Australian After then all the funny he's the big guys in all the funny movies. You would know him. He's Australia and he's big. He's in all the funny movies. Yeah, and I think you would find him with back what I don't know, because we'll look it up on the break. No, we won't. We'll be right back with more after this. Andrew coming down sadly, and we're back. So the play was of my cinema with Laton Mester and then also and in the understudy, but Andrew never saw Leaton Mester. And then Chris O'Dowd who is in Bridesmaids and he's not Australian, and I think he's British. He played Lenny who squeezes the mouse too hard. Chris dowd sounds like he has a big penis like like endowed, Like this has a name, I think big cock. Would you be happy with that last name? The way you are sick would be the understudy that the people would be disappointed to see what they came to the show here. Uh, and your mom's like you respect, let me in pants, Let me in the pants. So we went to the show. It was so no headphones. I had headphones, Noah, did you have had phones? No? Nikki had ear plugs to protect her ears. Plugs. That's what I meant to say. Yes, earplugs for sure. If you're good, No one, don't be care. Don't be care ear plugs you're not. But they're not well. No, your plugs aren't cut. They're protecting your ears. If you're like your plugs, your lame, you're you're you're hearing is going to be destroyed. Everyone on stage, of all the musicians you respect, they're wearing air plugs. They are Where do you get these? Um? Cat had some her husband bought because they go to shows all the time. So her husband bought her a nice pair for her birthday and she gave them to me because I forgot to give him back to her, so she said, you can keep them. Thanks Cat, I appreciate it. Um. I also like, you don't want those back. My ears are foulah. It looks like you stuck a cute tup in a baked z. I have orange in my ears all the time. It's nuts. Um So anyway, I had earplugs in, but the show was And I've been to a lot of shows recently. I I've loved all the shows I've been to. Dave was incredible, Wilco. Um I will say they in terms of David Wilko, they played all my favorite songs, so it's like, oh my god, and that's like my favorite shows. But this, there's something about the pace of the show was amazing. The like there was. She didn't talk a lot, which I would have wouldn't have mind, like I kind of like when people talk sometimes. Um. But it was just that she's bouncing around the whole time. She's having so much fun. She and then the l a ed screen behind whoever did the screens for Metric you don't get enough credit, shout out to you. Amazing lighting, amazing sound. The sound and lighting for that show was I'm not usually someone who's like wow the lighting and sound like I'm not trying to be. It was just I was think, king, I would love to go to the show if I were deaf. Deaf people take your deaf friends to go see Metric because it's um, it's incredible, and I just at one point I was like feeling the base, like what would this feel like if I were blind and deaf like I was, I was trying to experience it. I was like, this would be an awesome show. Your dog would be like I need earplugs. Yesterday, I went to a metal show here in Tucson and I realized the sex Yes now her stories and like the name of the different songs and one was sex Prisoner, it was Wormhaven, Exule, Sex Prisoner, and Gate Creeper. That's the show I went to. And it just sounds like made up. Okay, so you went to go see them and it was haunted for sure. Um there was there was, um a blind person there and I was just like thinking, like, wow, I would her what his experiences and um, they had a like a handicap section. So he went over there and he was standing over but it was like right by the wall of amplifiers and I'm just like I was just wondering, like what that experience would have been for him? Yeah, going to Yeah, maybe he should start to him. He wasn't. He wasn't dumb. Oh, No one learned the um the word dumb this weekend when someone is because um, we asked cat where she got her cat. She has a cat named Bucky, and she goes, I got him from the Dumb Dumb Friends League. They called the Dumb Friends Lead because it's animals are dumb. They can't talk dumb meaning can't talk. Did you know dumb that can't talk? How do people not know that? So when you heard that song that deaf, dumb and blind kid show plays a mean pin, it means he's deaf, he can't talk, and he's blind. Dumb means can't talk. And I love that they called the animal place that because that is the difference. Like, that's why we eat animals. It is because they're dumb. They can't talk. If they could talk, we would never eat them. And it's an important distinction to make. But yeah, I was dumb for three weeks and then he y oh man, what are you talking about? I also liked that there was another highlight for me, among many things from the weekend. After the concert, we didn't have like one group picture together, so um, we thought, all right, well, after the show, we'll go outside and we'll take a photo. And this is like why I love Nikki. So she gets her phone ready and then there's just like a group of guys that walk by and she's like, excuse me, can you take our picture? And of course they're like, yeah, of course we will. She's just like directing them so that we would get the perfect picture. Yeah, like the street, like make sure you get this lighting and then yeah, and then give them directions. Well, it's just like because we were at a certain looka. It wasn't like I went go across the street and turn this way. It was literally where they were standing. They just had to turn their back. Because people, if you're taking just out there for the layman, if you want to take a good photo, you see where the light's coming, right, Like if there's a big TV screen, use that TV screen light to to so have someone stand against the TV and shoot towards you. So we were in front of the film more. Most people would probably get a picture in front of the film more to be like we were here, but there's a huge neon, huge l e ed sign being like Metric tonight and it's all white and light and blue colors, and we would have been backlit. We would have looked like shadows in front of this thing. So we like, let's use that. It's like a ring light. And so we had the guy. I had the guy stand against that and shoot us the film more. Who cares that you well, we know, like we I just wanted to put it together. Would you rather have a photo that has shows your faces or one that shows the location. I think shittier photos showing location for me really yeah, because it's more of a memory. If not, I gotta go with the hell was it? Oh this is I don't think I'll ever forget that. That's where that was. It's like a busy streets. It's with the two people I went to the film more with, Like I wasn't in the showing off that I was there. I took if you went to the Eiffel Tower and the lights were coming off the Eiffel Tower and you're like, you know, let me get the lights from the Eiffel Tower to face my face. Well, I'm just saying it was we we are. I think our goal wasn't to get a picture of the film, or it was to get a picture of us three. Yeah, it's a different goal, but um yeah we got a picture and then um we had our whole Could you think about Metric because she did your song for did you think about it? Well, this is the thing my dad I told him last weekend, like we're going to Metric and he goes and I was like, oh, yeah, they you know, I bought their song to use my specials thirty dollars to use, which well money well spent but um it uh. And he was like, you should write them, Lo'll give you free tickets. And I'm like, what am I supposed to do? What am I? How am I? Let me just see how that's gonna go. I write them a d M them and I say, Hi, I spent thirty dollars using your song? Will you give me free tickets? Like? How do I ask for free tickets? I'm obviously someone who can afford to buy tickets. I don't know about if it's about the free ticket. I just say, you're gonna go see your show? Yeah, be like I can't wait to see your show. I'm going to be such a surreptitious way of being like, give me free to hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. First of all, Cat bought us the tickets right like a treatment like okay, so you could have been you know, like you could have d M them, Hey, I'm excited I'm coming to Denver to see you, which we could have gotten backstage and met them because after the show, when Nikki tagged them on Instagram, they had sent her a message and said, oh, next time, let us know that you're coming to our show. We would love to meet Nikki. The band would love to meet Nikki. Yeah, I get the feeling of not wanting to like just I know how people do it with me where they go where I go, just ask me for tickets, you know, like because they do the thing of like we want to come see you, and I have to go. I'll get you camps. It's just like there's there are times where you know, Metric did not need my ticket sales. They did very well, but I'm someone who's not like, you know, it's new to me doing theaters of this size, and when people write me that I know can afford tickets and they're kind of just like, hey, we're coming to see you, I just want them to buy the ticket and then tell me, which is exactly what we would have done in this scenario. But when I just don't like lying, and so if I'm like looking to get tickets, but I'm doing it in like a passive way potentially, but I did. I'm glad we didn't go by stage. I would have been stressed out about what I was wearing. I didn't bring cute enough clothes. And also I don't want to bug them. I'm sure they do meet and greets, and it would have been fine, and it would have been great. I just kind of I was almost glad not to meet them because I got to just have and I didn't have to be nervous the whole time being like, oh my god, I have to like see this person who has just had the best show ever and communicate how I feel about it. Not that I don't love meeting greets and all these things, but it was just um and I look forward to meeting them at some point because I after seeing her show last, their show two nights ago, I went on like a crazy binge yesterday of like reading everything about their songwriting process and their production and how they got together. And so now I I feel like I just know them so much more after seeing them, because I was blown away. If they're they're coming to Boston there, I don't know why I'm promoting their dates. I'm also coming to a lot of places. You should go see me, please God, my ticket sales are I have not promoted my shows at all. So if you are anywhere in Iowa or um, where else am I going? Memphis, UM thousand, California another place in California. Um, uh, just look at my toward dates. If you have money to spare, please come see me. It's going to be an amazing show. Um and I need I just I have not promoted my show at all. I'm so bad at promotion, so I have to say them in here. But also go seem hat trick because it was such a good show. It was so so good. No, what did you think as someone who had never really heard of them until I loved it? I thought their set was very thoughtful, and it seemed like like every every um like four or so songs, we're going into like a different phase. And I loved how in the middle of the set, um the guitar player and the singer her name is Emily right, yeah, Emily she they did an acoustic song of combat baby Yeah, and I thought it was so good. It was just like a nice little break and then they got back into us and there was once. I haven't really gotten into their new album. Do you ever have it where you hear a song for the first time and you just know it's about to be your favorite song that it's going to like You're like it's almost love at first sight, where you like I'm about to get sucked into a vortex of only hearing this song for the next four weeks. This is all I'm gonna listen to. And then after that I'm going to burn out and not be able to really hear it as much with the same like, and then two years later you have a little bit of a renaissance, and then two years after that you love, and then six years after that you'll have an even bigger one. Like the rest of your life. It is almost like running into a lover in public where you're like, you'll hear it and go like and like your body will fill with chills and like, yeah, there's such a dopamine hit from a song you love. The song that I'm obsessed with right now is it's called for Mentora. For Mentara's I think. God, Yeah, I did type in Foromna yesterday and they were like nothing to be found, But for Menora is like my new favorite. Yeah, it's I just as soon as she started playing it and like the I guess by the time of the first chorus hit, I had googled the lyric I heard to be like, what is this song and added it to my Spotify What was it? The acoustic one. It was the real version. I love an acoustic after a bunch of electric and then it's just like damn with just a guitar, just become so personal. Yes, And I wonder if it would stand out if they did all acoustic. I feel like because they go from Yeah, you need variety, you need peaks and valleys for sure. So it was really good. You went to a concert this weekend right now. Went to Jake Owen, who's from my hometown in Vio Beach, Florida, And uh yeah, he came through St. Louis. He played at the Family Arena in St. Charles, the Riverport. No, no, that's not Riverport. Sorry, okay, the Family are I've never been there, but I've heard a lot about us. I don't know who plays there. I mean a lot of people do. I think Kelly Clarkson went there once. I mean, like who like like sports team. I think, like like a soccer team, like a arena. I mean it's like an arena out of nowhere, like out of nowhere. Just and um yeah, I mean I was, you know, I it was. I I love him as like a performer, he like was Jake like he moved to Nashville from like Florida's. He went to Florida State, he broke his collar bone, moved to Nashville, opened up a bank account, and had a record deal within like a month. When we were like all like in our twenty what's a bank account? Part? Because okay, so he opened up a bank county Yeah, sorry, I'm trying to go. He gets a library card and then he has a book a book deal or like it's like, what does that have to do with anything? Does you mean like money in the bank account? Story was just cryptic. He lives a little chross because I feel like I was at the rush him. Okay, I'll fucking why I'm not holding up the brake sign. Yeah, there's nothing, but not that you would acknowledge. First of all, First of all, first he blink. You know, it's his third album came out n Es. Okay, So he gets a quiz Nos frequent shopper card. He signs the story okay, part of a tank and Ney thing. You know, he's running for presidents. So he gets a bank account and then so Obama went to Harvard, he became president. Okay, so no, so he the president, he opened the bank account with he gave them his CD and that person knew one record execution. You thought that we would get from the and Okay, I'll tell you what happened. I'll tell you what happened. This is what happened. Okay, I'll tell you what happened. This story. But you think I didn't even know that, but the list dumb terms. I'll tell you what happened. There's no one here. Everyone's a lame And besides the story story, this is this is the reason why I don't know why I was telling his origin story. And when I got caught in the origin story, I wanted to get out of it. But the only way to get out of it was to get him to be a superstar as quick as possible, because the origin story had nothing to do with the concert. That's what happened. So funny, I got stuck in origin. He gets he got a record. He was born a burro beach in a river, in a river boat in four He grew up in the mangroves. Yeah, none of this is pertinent. Pertinent, Okay, that is so funny. He gave his he gave his mix tape to the guy at the bank and then the bank had some connections and then it led to a record. So within like six months he was opening for Kenny Chesney. So like he's been famous in our hometown for like twenty years now. I mean, it's kind of guy that made good. Yeah, he made good and we were never we were kind of close. He has a twin brother who like sells insurance, who I was closer with. What's his origin story, that's pretty much the whole thing. He opened up a bank account of the state beach. Ye. So so anyway, so Jake was nice enough to get me and Brennan tickets. We were third row, like center stage. Did that come to beat? Did you reach out to him, let's get the ticket? I had Cat bought the tickets and then I know I I reach out to him. Yeah. Did you say how did you do it in a passive way? Because you didn't say can I get free tickets? No? No, of course, not exactly. I said, Jake, I got look, can't wait to see you. Know. I've known you since the bank account, Davis, since before you opened up bank at out. Yeah, I've known you before when you were just making cash and sad cafe. Yeah, so I said I want to hear. I said, I would like to see you perform. Wait, let's just see the text. No, you're gonna you're gonna make fun of it because I was passive. Yeah, but I don't know what I'm talking about. This is what I That's what I hate doing. I just want to like say I done stuff like this before. I swear to God I have This is what I always say. I go, hey, I'm I always I really don't do that. I always I can't three rows of people to get to a better vantage point to see metric, like because I'm like a good person. It's just like butt you just say, can I get free tickets? Is my true question? Yeah, I don't know. I I think it's hard for people to write free. I think it's like you know, for for Tom, when I asked him, I go, um, I'm I'm I'd love to see you and that all that. I was just like, I'm gonna come see you. And I said, I said, um, I know that we get camps. So I think I wrote, do you have any comps? If not, I'm totally fine paying. That's what I wrote, I think, which was true. So I did ask for comps, but I acknowledged, but I asked for them. I didn't go like, hey, you're coming to It's tougher to ask that for some reason. Well that's what I'm saying. It's not easy to ask for what you actually want, but it's not the passive way. But I get it. I get why. I mean literally everyone who asked me for tickets and you can continue to do this. They go, I'd love to We're gonna come see you. What time is the show? And that's kind of the way they do it where it's like, don't buy tickets. I got you, but even though you could afford it, and I do need those ticket sales and it wouldn't matter to me, just don't get you in Oh, so I said, And this, I guess this does come passive aggressive. But here's the thing or passive passive. So I said, remember the bank. I go, should I come to the show tomorrow night? And he goes, how far is it from you? I go thirty minutes? He goes, come on, bro, I go, me and my girl will come. Should we hang with you? Girl? You're talking like country understand what I'm talking about. What I self, me and my lady, You're coming down works back style. We'll leave now, I reckon, we'll get there. Yeah, so six weeks later we got there. Uh, should we hang with you backstage? Or buy tickets and maybe hang after I got you covered? I'll hit you tomorrow. It sounds good, see you soon. Okay, So you did offer to buy tickets? Okay, so you did pretty much the same thing when you get me backstage? Or should I buy tickets? How piss would you have if you have to buy ticket? Honestly I would have been angry. I I did want to hang with him, just because, like I mean, I'm kind. So we did get to hang. So there were some There's a really funny moment at the concert. So you're gonna call this cut, I think, but I wanted to get out of it, and so I don't do anything. So he throws bud lights into the crowd. That's that's dangerous, is it? At You're you're nine steps, you're nine bank. It's very dangerous. So he's like hands or okay, bottled broken bottle? Under right? Did someone get hurt? He's throwing him but like second row, he threw one at me and the guy connect to me caught it. I got hit with an ear. I got two picks from got hit in the ear with a pick that he threw out. That's crazy. But anyways, he's throwing bud lights in the crowd and you know, you see him throw one like two ft you know. For next you know, he throws like five or six, and you see him getting a little bit more like let's let's get a little bit far, and I can see it in his eyes and getting too confident with throwing him people catching on me like yeah, and then he like literal points like dude about I mean, it's so far, like I'm talking like twot like like, and he just comes, yeah, bro, you and the guy's like yeah, and he goes and it just it seemed like forever and it just it hit a woman, That's what I'm saying, on the head, who looked like she was already confused of why she was there before she got and and someone's girl, but he's in the middle of the song, so it was like a traffics Scotts. And then I'm just watching this woman the whole time for the next three songs, cause she's just like despondent, like I can't believe her. Yeah, I could see her from stage. You're turning around and looking at like like she can't see that I'm looking at her, but she remember, we know, would just be like, oh, I'll go you and what's the thing where kind of no, no, no, like I'm getting better because you've told me many times, Like you know the classic thing of like you kick him under the table and he goes, why are you kicking me? Or like if there's facial figurement, he'll go like look over there, look do you see And I'm like, we all see the person the girl in the wheelchair, Yes, what was the person that got on their knee? And that we were laughing at the guy on his knee, but it looks like we're laughing at someone in a witch But like I could just see if if something happened. Andrews turning around like like you're not good at on peripheral vision, dude. Look, I just kept looking at her because I felt bad for her. I really did feel bad for her, and she looked so despondent, like I just get oh my god, how did I protect predict that? Sandress? I mean so so then so I see her though like three songs after that, she starts singing again. I was like, okay, either she's really fun and you were really worried about that. I was kind of. I was just so intrigued because not every day you get hit with a beer. So then so Jake gets a tattoo earlier in the day and he goes, you know, I've just you know, been a little down and I just felt again a tattoo of just like drawing like these guys did for him. And he's like, does anyone in the cry I won't get tattooed? And this drunk woman, I don't get beerhead not a different woman. Actually, like seven people raised a hand. Of course, people love free tattoos, especially at a JC, and they offered it. By no, he's like this woman they put out the tape on stage and he's just singing a song and she's just like getting a tattoo. Hundreds of people at that show would have talked about probably once you start getting tattoos, you don't care about at it like Ian gets them. That is true. I don't know if this one. I don't know if this woman is a tatoo. The next thing, you know, this woman she got one. I know I thought about it, but so then, uh, it was pretty funny, like I made a stupid but the two people got tattooed the bud like girl and like, who do you think woke up more upset? Like the girl that Yeah, that girl that had an imprint of a can ring on her forehead for the rest of her tattoo. It's so embarrassing to get hit in the face by anything when you don't see it coming. That's why I hate when boys are playing ball or catch or any kind of sport near me. I told him if he got sued for like Florida, May countries, I'm surprising more people don't get hurt at shows, and then they must maybe the venue pays for it, because people get hurt at shows bouncing like there's just no way, and so who's paying for that? I wonder? I don't know. I mean it was it was I could see her. Did anyone see the Woodstock documentary not yet limpid? Like fred Durst has something? What did he throw? He's the one that kind of got them to be like break ship funck shit up and like they were already so hied and then he was just like he got them to just go next level start, he played a song that was called like break Ship, break stuff or break stuff, and so people just started and they started like surfing on all the you know, big pieces of plywood they were pulling off the sound. Have you ever seen a con throw a person into the crowd, Someone like threw something at him on stage and he's like, oh, that's cool, man, come up on stage, you can hang out. And then he threw him and then he and she's like, yeah, I can't go to any genre of concert. So so then we go backstage, which was really cool, but like people are getting tattooed like left and right because there's a tattoo. Ares No, I wasn't feeling. Yeah, it wasn't divide, but it was. It was a really it was a really fun night. And I don't know, it's a it's different. Music is like, it's so weird that comedy you just go, you just need a microphone. They need know much shit. I know many people they go. I know they're making a lot of money, but man, there's a lot of Oh boy, there's like forty people just work backstage manning different stuff. And then also your band, which you got to pay pretty handsomely and then when people start like why did they go solo? Yeah, so much of their sales is merch. That is, the artists depend on merch so so much. Speaking of new merch, on my tour, it's dope. I worked very hard to make it the Good Girl Tour. Yeah, so I tried to name I wanted to name it the name of my special, but then my agent said people would think it was the same material from the special, And I'm like, isn't that so funny? Like if I know it's been noted before. But musicians, if you pay played new music, everyone hates you. But if you're a comedian and you do anything, you can only do new stuff, and if you do anything that is recognizable, people go. People have a right to just dismiss you as just taking our money, like we already saw this. But it does make sense because comedy laughter is a response to being scared or surprised. That's why a lot of times people after they're scared, they laugh. It's a very common response to being scared as to have people giggle. You do it sometimes when you're nervous, you laugh. Do you think do you think? So? You know, comedy is like do you think this joke is going this way, and I'm gonna say this way and then you laugh. So it's about surprise. So if you hear something, you know, but I've heard the same story more than once. Like George Carlin started that thing like a new special every two hour, and then Louis said it. You know you. But the thing is, even if you think it's just as good, it's not as good as the first time you heard it. Yeah. I saw Mitch Hedberg though, and like he was a one liner guy, so obviously, and then what happens is people starting literally saying it's punch. Yeah, but you know what, it's just as close to as good as the first time you heard it. Is the first time your friend who you know will appreciate the joke. Here's it. You know. It's like showing someone a YouTube video. I right now, it's a good break. I am so obsessed with a video I cannot stop watching it. I watched it on the plane yesterday on repeat for an hour. It is that guy Eggs Tyrone who puts dance. He takes people like different dancing clips and then puts different music to it, so these people look like the dancing different songs. It's so good eggs tyrone spelled exactly like you think it is. And they did this. He took this one from Diddy and his son's dancing. Diddy is dressed up like um pennywise from it, and then his sons are dancing around him and the dancing is just phenomenal. It's so interesting. But if they're dancing to just a rap song. But then he took that music out and put in modest mouse Brain, Dick and Dick, Ding Crash and the good thing. It's all my story. I'm gonna put on my story every single day until I stop being obsessed with it, because I need to know. I have never liked a video this much in my life. I can't stop watching it. It makes me happy, it soothes me. It is like I feel, you know how sometimes special needs people like watch the same video or chill Dren just want the same thing over and over and over. Beauty and the Beast, Beauty and the Beast. Like just I've never been this obsessed with something. I mean, granted it's a forty five second video, but I'm watching it on repeat, just the way the dancing is. It just it's something about it's the most. It's it's the thing in the world that has hit me the most, in like a place of like this is everything I've ever wanted the world is okay. I like the idea because I see those kind of videos and they'll play like yakety sacks or whatever, like over like something that's really cool. But I like that modest mouth. Can I play it for you to see if you're in transpired as me, I'm sure I will be. But I like that the song still has somewhat of rhythm. It's still kind of cool. The song is so cool, so it's not like completely making a joke out of it, you know what I mean? Yes, And I would think most that song was cool before smartphones. So a lot of people are being introduced to the songs something okay, So it's the middle one on the top. I love the idea that modest mouth like becomes see if Andrew enjoys it in much of that like don't get a hit one morning, they'll be like, why did I have nine million? M good? It's just did he and his son's walking down the hall way. But watch how good I call God. I thought you would be afraid of the clown. No, it makes me happy. The clown is so cute. It makes Pennywise. Like yesterday I walked past a sewer and I was like, where are you coot? It was a little chipmunk came out of the seward instead. It scared me because I really was looking for penny Wise. And I love that. It's like, you didn't get to the a. I didn't again he went to the bank account. No, don't, don't worry about it now, but you got to watch it all later. It's so good because you know because then it goes and we all okay. The he changes the rhythm the like there's something so soothing about dancing that goes exactly to the song that I really like. Who knew that I was into dancing so much. I'm obsessed TikTok where they do Oh we gotta go to break? I could feel it. I could feel it. We'll be back right after this with Top one Bottom one on Nicky Glazer podcast. Alright, we're back crash um and I will see on that video that eggs tight rown guy. He doesn't only put in the music. What's brilliant about that guy is that he makes the music almost sound like it's coming from that event, so he won't it's not played over it. It's so he puts a little claps in the song to make to match the claps of the dancers, so it makes it sound like that's the song that was playing in that hallway, and he you know, distorts the sounds so that it sounds like it was in that hallway, to which you don't realize something so much like effects. A video was like, um, there was another video yesterday that I go oh, I went down on fucking worm home yesterday. I don't even want to talk about it. And I found someone that I've never been more jealous of in my life whose life I just like, I can't. I wrote on yet and I was like, do you know who this girl was? And she was like, don't do this to yourself, Nikki. She's perfect. I'm not even gonna say who it is because I don't. She is funny, she's gorgeous, she's has perfect style, a perfect home, a perfect dog, a perfect boyfriend, a perfect amount of like she's like, does does her own products, she and her husband collaborate perfectly like it. It is so triggering. I could not I was in bed watching her and just it was like cutting myself. I couldn't stop. I was trying to find anything about this woman's life that was tragic that maybe spoke to a deep pain. Um on you was like, I think her parents are divorced. I was like, okay, we got stuff that like there was there's but there's nothing, there's nothing. Her life is perfect in Anya Anya. Usually when I present her with someone, she goes Nikki. You don't understand, like that girl probably has this, she probably doesn't eat that much, and like, but this girl, we both concluded, literally has a perfect life. And Anya was like, I can't go down that. Don't send me down that hole again. I don't want to give anything now. There's no there's nothing I will give anyone about this girl. I'll just say and if you're talking, she's already we already married her off. Um. Yeah, and she's so tiny, she's four. Um. Okay, let's get into top one. Bottom one. Today's category is an anticipation of me traveling to l A. I think that was kind of it. I'm I'm traveling tonight, traveled yesterday, Noah traveled yesterday. We all spend a lot of times and they met the best sie at the airport. Really, her name is Sid. Yes, okay, so I recognized you. I was at my gate eating Cheetos, which is what I got from the topic and Cheddar get the Cheddar so uh. And it was like seven minutes before boarding, and I'm I was debating if I shoulder This is what I was debating. Do I do I wipe them on my used tissue that's in my bag or do I just go wash my hands because the bathroom was right there? Or do I suck? But I was at the wet okay, so yeah, but then I would wipe it on my jeans. So anyway, I decided to go to the bathroom and wash my hands. And as I'm walking with like my cheeto hand, all I heard was can I get your picture? And I just looked and I didn't hear the first part of what Sid said. She goes, Hey, I'm a bestie. Can I get a photo with you? Please? And she's so cute because later she told me She's like, oh I know, um what Nick? He says like, have your phone ready? So I had my phone? Oh my god. Anyway, so she likes I asked those guys too. I was like, following my own room did exactly. So just a quick tidbit. She said she would listen to us every single day. A sidbit in Africa, in Africa, in Africa, which I think we should take time to acknowledge our international listeners, by the way, because there's a lot I got. I got a text or a d M from someone who I said Uganda the other day. I just, you know, as a reference point for something. And he was like, thank you for shouting out Uganda. And I'm like, hell, yesu Wanda. What's up? So she was serving as a as a medic and she was talking sorry a medic and she was traveling back home. She had an issue with her and she had to be laid over in Colorado and she was just listening to Thursday's podcast and she knew we were in Colorado, and she was just like, I can't believe I see you at the airport. Che That is so cute. There a photo, Cheet. Did you show your cheeto fingers? I was like, I have Cheeto dust all over my fingers. Can I please wash my hands first? That's so cute. I love that so much. I am that's so nice. Someone wrote me from after the Metro concert and was like, you have a doppelganger at the film wore in Denver unless it was. But if you don't, there's someone who looks exactly like you know. I'm like, oh man, I wish you would have said hi. I love a good recognizing like say hello. I hate always went in doubt and I'm not a bad enough looking gal. Where if you tell someone hey are Unique Glazer and it's not me that they're going to be like fuck you, you know, so just take a gamble. I would hope not, except unless you know. I have a joke where people go are Unique Glazer and I have no makeup on it, and I go, you think I look like this pointing to myself, because I do. Sometimes I look so unlike myself without makeup that if I get recognized, I get really offended. It's like, where did you see me? Where we're ever presenting this except every day on YouTube. It was one of your depressed days during COVID. I remember for three seconds, but oh man, yeah, I'm talking about it. But what's the category? The category is something at the Hudson News, which is the airport fo data. Yeah, the airport it's in every single airport. It's like Hudson News. It's classic. They sell the same stuff almost all the time. There's a couple variations here and there you'll find, but mostly it's always the same stuff. Um, let's stop. Let's start with the bottom thing. Um. I hate that they have the worst options for snacks, for anything healthy. There is nothing healthy in a Hudson News besides water, There's nothing. I don't care you're like, but what about the green Peace snap crisps um? Are you really going to eat one four of that bag? No, you're not. You're gonna eat the whole bag. It's four servings. It is so bad for you. Too much sodium, too much like nothing. There's what's the perfect healthy snack that needs to be there? Um? I really do like some places carry those um like baked at a mom A and they have such a good pop in your mouth. Those are really good. Umar is definitely a great choice, but I will say I hate um and they are always out of like very often out of diet coke. I have noticed as someone who just started re drinking diet coke, die PEPSI. No one cares for everyone loves diet coke. Everyone it's diet cokes are always taken and diapepsies are there being like we're here, and it's like I know you are, no, thank you. I hate that. I hate when I go to a restaurant and they go you go like it's like not even like like I'm weird for thinking it's different. And then I go now and they go Okayte David's Fade just did a great bit about this on Kimmel his last appearance on Kimmel. It's so funny where he's like, yeah, people will go diepe pepsi and they kind of look at you like I know, I'm sorry pepsi it's gross and he's like yeah, no, and they're like like but it's it's that exact thing of like, no, it's not okay, it's not it's not even close. Also, they get mad if you go no, then I don't want it. They go it's the same thing, and they know it's not the same thing. It's done at all. I get that that's kind of in the same world. Pepsi is nowhere near it. But I will still drink a diet pepsi. I'm not against it, but um, but Yeah, we have diet cokes often in the Hudson News, and it's like a very bonding thing when when we're traveling because it's a treat, because we know it's bad. We know it's naughty, and we should just be getting water right there. You know what I hate in the Hudson News. Water for four. That's what I hate of the Hudson News. Go funk yourself. And also, you know what I hate is when the people working there either aren't manning the front of it, like they're just stalking things and the whole line backs up, or there's one person. This is my number. Sorry, top one, top bottom one thing Hudson News. People who get a bag for their soda or their water or their little cheese crisps. Stop getting bags. You guys are if you can carry it in your hand, walk out of the store with it. I'm so sick of people just yeah, I'll take a bag for that. For your buying a pack of gum and you need a gigantic Hudson News bag. Oh you're gonna reuse it, No you're not. No one reuses it. Listen. I'm not perfect when it comes to plastic bags. But if you can carry it up to the front counter and you're not spilling things everywhere. You can walk out of the store with it without a bag. Final answer, I think bottom is the sandwich selection. I like a quick sandwich. Give me some options, give me something maybe fresh, something that was maybe made that day and not nine years ago. So are the options generally? Like it's like turkey and like I think it's American cheese. Do they have uncrustables there? Like I would love to. I've never had one, but man, they look so good. They just look like they're they're soaked up bread. I saw one on the ground yesterday and I wanted to eat That wasn't an old It wasn't it was It had a circle pattern to it. You just saw a perfectly sitting there. It had a big bite out of it. Even what happened to that, I don't know. Yeah, who gives up on an uncrustable after you take one bite? And who after crossed on the ground? Just trash? Can you trash? So funny? Do you know where trash cans are? When you are trash? What do I want my mom to make me? And uncrest? Like someone made that? Like I like my sandwiches without crust. Yeah, people did. Did you like that? Yeah? I didn't mind crust. I think my mom like made me crust like that, that's good for you. Like it's almost like the peel of an ore of an apple. It's like, do you know that has like the most fiber in it is the outside? Okay, I'm supposed to it sometimes, but I don't think that's the way it is for sandwich. Like sometimes I'll throw a lot of mayo on there, and I'll put chips on their chips on top of the sandwich, and it'll just taste like a processed It'll bring it back to lunchable days and there's like some kind of nostalgic good feeling about eating absolute dogshit. Okay, so sandwich selection a little better of a sandwich and not for fucking we're not gonna we're not gonna be able to convince some of that inflation. Yeah, noah, what about you? Okay, controversial. I really don't like that they have books there for sale because it puts on me very antireading. Yeah, but well, I just I just feel like I don't It's like it's almost like if you buy a book, you're one of those people who's like so put together and you use your time on a plane to like read and get all this world the illusion of that because people, most people, including me, when you buy a book where the crowduts sing five months ago, you just read the first page or two, you get tired and you put it away and then you forget it in the back of the chair in the plane. It is more of like buying the illusion of the person you want to be. I don't think most airport books even get read. There are people that will walk past and they'll look at it like they feel like, you know, you're at like the Smithsonian or something. They're acting like, oh, maybe I've never seen anyone buy a book either. I don't know if you think I have bought a lot of books, but I will say I never read them. So I only read books on my phone. And so I wanted to buy a book the other day when I had to wait for like two hours for Noah's plane to get into your waiting and I was like, oh, we'll go to the bookstore. And then I was like, bitch, buy a book on your phone. There's so much cheaper. I was about to spend twenty four dollars on a book that I got for eight bucks on my phone. Yeah, the magazines. I used to buy magazine before. I mean it's all the phone. It's the phone's fault. I mean I would buy a Rolling Stone. Did like magazines back in the day, a big magazine. I loved the big mag I'd read it before the flight would take off. Magazines are yeah, well they have to be because no one's buying them. Yeah, yeah, they used to be like three nine. Um. Yeah. I I sometimes on the way if I have a connecting flight, on the way out of a plane, I look and people will leave behind the magazines that they've already read, and I just steal from the first class like the trash they leave on the seats. It's a great solution. You get a lot of good Remember flying before phones and like if the movie wasn't there and then you didn't have anything to read, how you could do is look at the fucking that for sale book. Or today, my phone was about to die and my AirPods weren't working, so I was just like, what did you do? I just um, oh. The girl next to me was trying to kind of talk to me and so I just pretended I was sleeping. I couldn't. She just was like, well, it looks like we're gonna be friends. She like sat closer to me because it was like it's gonna be a full flight, folks. You're gonna want to use those middle steeds. And she just went moved from the aisle to the middle just being like which I thought was like someone will sit there. She moved. She was just like it was weird. She just and she goes, well, it looks like we're gonna be best friends. And I was just like, we are. That is when I put on my eyemask, I just go and I'm like, why don't I stall my phone? That says I can't talk? There's no she she left the aisle opens yeah for people boarding. It was so weird. Yeah, and she didn't move back to just kept saying stuff to herself like, well, don't usually do that. Someone was the fight attendant was like, you know, ma'am, you have to put the bag underneath, and she was like, I knew that. I knew that. I usually don't do that. Like, you know, people that just want to get a conversation going, so they start just like almost like fly fishing. They just like kind of say little things that someone will take the bait, and I'm like, I'm not giving it. I love shutting down a co sign because they go bag under the chair. What's the point And You're like, no, you're not getting I'm not co signing with you. I don't care a little partner here, yeah here, No, I'm not doing that. I had sound like a real brat, But what moment yesterday on my flight back homes um sitting behind me was a sports broadcaster and I can tell by the tone of his voice that he was definitely like in broadcasting. And then I learned about his whole career because he was just bombarding this woman who was sitting next to him with his price history and he was like showing her things out of the window as we were landing, explaining like what all these things aren't like, Oh, that is my number one pet. Peeve used you to listen to me. Listener, if you're on a plane and you're a little chatty, Cathy, keep your voice down. I know it sounds like it's a scream because it's like the almost like white noise of the airplane makes it seem like you have to shout louder everyone can hear you. It is so rude. I'm at the point where I'm going to start telling people to shut up because it is so rude. People will talk. It'll be like a seven am flight and someone's just in the mood to talk and they start chatting, and the person next to them doesn't have boundaries, so they just let them talk the whole time and kind of keep like. I'm just like, man, this woman needs to go to a fucking meeting because she needs to stand up for herself. Like I just start just like diagnosing people that have being codependent because the person will be talking and the person you can tell the person's annoyed with this person talking to them because no one wants this. But then they keep kind of keeping it going because they don't want to be rude. Be rude. Shut these people down and start a person who talks even yeah, even if you're on a flight with a friend, keep I've been on a flight with person we talked the entire time, and I have told her like we've been like, we got to keep it down because there are people around us sleeping, and you do not need to scream, but you know what people love to do is to they love having people hear how cool like hearing about their life. It gives people an opportunity to be in a small, confined space where other people will hear about your life. They honestly do. And I know, I get to perform every night, So maybe I don't know what it's like to not have that little outlet. But you are a bad person. If you talk the entire flight, you're You're a selfish person. You're not nice. People are trying to sleep. I don't care what time of day it is. Your kid. Again, the definition of is doing something so that other people see you do it, and you give the illusion that you don't know they're seeing you do it, but you do the thing that you wouldn't do by yourself. So if you were having a conversation as a kid and sports broadcaster because you want everyone around you to know you're famous, you are good and you deserve and I hope this's like crashes and I will take I will know the world doesn't have to deal with you. Oh wait, no, I'm just the front of the fight, just the front of the plane. You're just his seat gets to sex prisoner. You won't die. If you're listening to a sex prisoner, you'll finally yeah, because that's the guy wants to everyone to hear. He's not someone that's anxious because he's explaining how to flight. You know, the difference between someone who's having a conversation is just a loud person, and the difference between someone who wants people to hear. And my granddaughter said this, and I never thought Sports Center would be calling. And then sure enough I open a bank account. Next, what's your top stuff at Hudson Top Hudson For me is Antac being in there. Thank you, Thank you for having medicine because sometimes, especially after a hangover, especially after a trip to Vegas, I have heartburn. I think it's a heart attack. I'm about to have a panic attack. I'm about to go up in the air, and I need something to come that fucking pain in my chest. And thank you Zantac. I appreciate you, even though I found out that I think it kills people, but it's still ship. Yeah. I'll say, um tiny deodorans because when you are like you realize you're on a trip and you forget and you're gonna be stinky. That's very great. But also I said it before, Kind bars are the number one thing to get. They are vegan, they are they don't have too much sugar. They are a perfect snack. They're always a little bit too expensive, but they are my favorite. Like, I have very specific needs with my bars, and those are the only bars that you can find everywhere that are actually delicious and not like packed with sugar. So I love kind bars or like have milk in them. Mine is so. I only see this at the Hudson News, although I didn't see it in Colorado. There's this hot and spicy checks mix, and whenever I see it there, I had no idea. You're such a like a little snack. Yeah, you knew they we learned about what was it? Weird snacks? Do you do you like takies? No? I'm like a purist. I like the stuff that I ate as a kid. Right, I'm trying to think if I still ate wrap, what I would eat only pretzels and checks? But I like the checks I would get. I love popcorn, though it gets stuck in your throat and you feel like you're like dying sometimes when you eat it. My dad I just envisioned how he used to eat popcorn and it's scary. He gets in there. Every dad eats popcorn because I was like the only snack back in the day, and they would just like, yeah, my dad's always eats it and then throws the dogs and then wonders why they just will not stop looking at him the rest of the night because they think little popcorn is going to show up somewhere else. Um. I will say about the cheetos, I think, and whenever I'm eating something that has like a dust residue, I hate it on my fingers. It's so gross and then you lick your fingers. Then it gets even more on because they just like nachos, Deritos do that, Yes, I Um, I do the thing where I will uh if it were like Doritos or something, I would crunch up the bag so it's they're a little smaller, and then I would just pour the bag into my mouth slowly, just like yeah, drinking. I honestly do that with so many things. There are these like these lupini beans I eat that are lately really gooey and they're you're just eating with your hands and I just can't do it, and I just dump them into my mouth slowly. What do you think about you look over? I mean the Cheeta's chopsticks. I would I would do that, but no one ever has chopsticks on hands but I but I have had things with chopsticks before. I respect it. I love chopsticks. I would prefer to eat things with chopsticks as opposed to a fork. Well, I see people eating, especially Asian people, they eat lobster, they put gloves on, gloves on. Then your hands don't smell like fish all day. But then it's interesting that you'll take fish to the mouth you don't want on your hands. You would think you would hate fish so much, but it's smart. But maybe chet gloves, maybe orange gloves for cheetos. Oh yeah, you know what I used to when I used to um glove, I would like eat a whole pint of ice cream, you know that ice cream that like halo top or whatever you need. I used to wear a winter glove to hold it because my hand would get too cold. And it is great. It is a great solution. It is. Or even with a hot bowl, if you're eating, like sometimes my oat meal is really hot, I'll put on like winter glove to hold it. You put a little scarf around me. Need picture of what's your favorite chip? Growing up? I mean really, I hated I hated. I hated like regular chips growing up, but I don't know why, and I'm so mad that I did, because they're delicious and I just there's so many foods I squandered before I knew like about you know, if things were bad for you, Yeah, and I just didn't like them because they were like I don't know, I just don't like that's like, bitch, that is so delicious. And you're gonna miss the years that you said you didn't want things. Can you imagine going into the store and just getting shark bites and dunk a ruse and not even thinking at all about the health I think about mostly about pizza. I missed the days where eating pizza was free, like was just like you were just you know that classic joke of like I want that last piece, like now, I'd be like, I hope someone else takes it because I don't can't have it, like everything, oh just eating everything. I just if you're a child out there listening, enjoy that you don't have any guilts associated with food yet it is a magical time in one's life. You try not yet, try not to give that to your kid yet about calories or fat. Just let your kids fucking go. Man, it was so nice. You know what chips I eat the big plays. I love barbecue. Those are great on a sub boy sandwich. That's what I was used to get. Yeah, and they make a chedd or sour cream and it convinces you that that's healthy. Blah blah blah. Oh my god, it's so good, dude. They're not too bad for you. I don't think they're baked. Yeah, they're so so good. Um. Or you know, a great thing is to take the bag lays, crunch up the bag and then sprinkle it over salad crutons. It's really good, and then then they crunch just think crunching. Yeah, just like bake the you know, squeeze the bag so it breaks it up and then you can eat things like if you're just pouring a bag of chips into your mouth with the whole chips, they're gonna hit you in the face and spill all over before put on a you know, like one of those fancy clubs that goes all the way up. Yeah. Um, I love talking snacks. You gotta do this mor show ahead of us. I'm going to l A tomorrow. I'm gonna be there until December, so we are going to be doing this show remote, but you won't notice. Don't even worry. We'll have tons of l A stories for you. UM. Thank you guys for listening. Thank you to said, thank you to Uganda, Thank you India. UM, and we will see you tomorrow. Dumpika and Jackson Pollock poll pollock, not pollocks. That sounds like a okay,

The Nikki Glaser Podcast

Every Monday through Thursday, comedian and infamous roaster Nikki Glaser provides a fun, fast-paced 
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