The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello, it's Nikky. You welcome to the podcast. Here I am. I'm in Satlas, Missouri with Andrew. He has a basketball he is um playing with and hitting the mic with Hey, Andrew, how's it going. How's it hanging? No, you're not throwing that ball. It's that is you would hit the mic, it would hit my tooth, knock it out, and the show would be over. Come back. Oh my god. Yeah, the tooth just lodges into my perfectly smooth skinny jeans local cord um. Noah is here in Arizona. Um, thanks so much to everyone could back. Oh yeah, you want him to do a layup? Yeah, that's like the one word go from basketball. It's the only word. Well, that's so cute. I was like, really, do you want to learn something? A college layup is and you jump high enough where you slapped it back and take you four to six years to do it. Well, it can take its junior year in high school. I could finally do it. It It was a big moment. It's a big moment for boys. What does it wait, So it's a different sort So they got like along like the backboards. Some backboards are higher, but most normal size backwards backboards. When you do a layup, you slap the backboard after you let the ball, you like kind of give it a little white guy dunk. That's what it's like when you when people. Sometimes when I'm running, I just want to, like, I like grab for a branch or something. You know, you got to hit things up high when they're there to be hit. I love hitting a thing up high. I really do. It's so fun. Yeah, there's a few signs in our hallway where you get to hit them a little bit. Really, at least on the third floor, are you That's why we've had a bunch of fire alarms go off just trying to take that five nine to about six one vertical. It was huge for guys back in the day. They had shoes where you would pump them. Well, that was one thing we did have. Are so cool cock true story. But no, they do stuff for your calves where it was called strength shoes or something, and they were like higher here. Those they were called shape shape ups. Do you remember shape ups? We are all the women who wore shape ups in the two thousand and eight I want to say seven eight. They were so popular. Brooke Burke, I think was like the spokesman form they were in every magazine was like shape Ups and they were bigger in the back than the front, so that when you walked, it like made you you're almost like walking uphill down hill. I don't know. It was just but they promised that you would like get extra like muscle tone from them. People are like, I want to just walk normally. I don't know. People are always looking for shortcuts to burn calories or straight tone or star thin. If you can just like strap on a belt that like vibrates, people are still falling for that ship, Like do you still say? Like breaking news, Sketchers had to pay forty million dollars to settle Federal Trade Commission charges that had deceived customers with ads for the toning shoes. Yes, bullshit, there's no one that has better legs because they wore shape Ups. But at what point can if I was the plaintiff, at what point do I have a case? You know what I mean? Like how many times you have to wear them to go? You know what? You bet? Someone was like, let's take this, let's go to an expert and run tests on it and get like an actual data back about what this is doing. And then when it proved nothing, it was like, okay, we have a case if you bought shape ups between the years, A man, I just missed out on a class actions something that Now there was some thing that I just missed the window. It was like some kind of beauty product. It would have just been fun to get a part of that. You know, they paid like fourteen billion dollars or something to you know, pay off all these people. I forget what it was. This is a pointless story, but um, well, how do you get on the list like that? Like how do you got to find a lawyer? Or does one lawyer get everyone together? And it was something that I bought it like Target, though they wouldn't have my name associated with it. It wasn't like a huge purchase either, but it would have just been fun to go like, yeah, fuck you, that didn't work. Forget what it was. Um, I and baby powder. You guys know about it, Like don't use that? Ever? What do I do for my Johnson Johnson's baby powder? Um? I mean they don't use it anymore. But for years it had talc in it. But even after they said they took the talk out which talc is. Talc Is has asbestos in it, and people have read about Johnson Johnson's baby powder and every little baby, every baby, and every women. They used to advertise it to women, being like, you're a sloppy slut if you don't put baby powder on your pussy so that everyone doesn't have to smell it. So women, we're dousing themselves in it for years, and all these women got um uh uterine cancer, ovarian cancer and wonder big pharma and big baby powder. They know each other and they're like, and I'll scratch your back, you scratch your mind, you know what I mean, like like give people cancer. And then I mean it's very Aaron BROCKOVICI, I love that movie, a movie that I almost didn't see, and I'm so glad I did. It was like I saw it after it was big, because it was big when I was like not into like things about lawn to watch right after Pretty Woman, Yeah, I just just see how where she went with her life. She became like a brilliant pretty woman. Julia Roberts was always capable of being a litigators. She She's a moxie, that girl. But that is like a movie. There's so many old movies that I just was too young to appreciate how like fucking good they are. Like if I would have been too. If someone out there hasn't seen Jerry McGuire, get fucking on it, Aaron Brockovich, Um, what are some other movies that like First and Last Name, Thomas Crown Affair. I've never seen that, but here it's good right for it's gump. I never saw the Green Mile. I never saw that's my new my next nephew, that Miles Green. That's a good name. Miles has been big. Right now, we're just stumble upon a child's name and you're like, I want a baby, and then I just go I should just get a band. Yeah, I mean it's it's weird if you like, if you're like, I find a name, I got a name speaking of a name. So you know how we call things that are like hard to hear you like ear rape but said French so it doesn't offend anyone. Um, and you can say it in front of people and no one goes your rape. Um. Sara Lena saw some Sarah therapist my friend's earl A therapist that is like challenging her to put herself in more uncomfortable situations because she's so I think she'll be okay with me saying this if she's not well, this is just a test, but you have uncomable listen to this podcast, listen to me paraphrase the therapy you went to privately and shared with me one on one. No, I really don't think she'd have a problem with this, um but she went to a guy that was like because and I think so many people can relate to this. She's a people pleaser. She just wants everyone to be okay all the time. She will sacrifice anything of herself to make others feel comfortable all the time. She she's better at it than anyone I know. I'm almost like, will you please not stop doing that? Because I really like and having you buy me a Dave Matthew sweatshirt. She's like, by the way of stay in the hand, it will be a week now, Like, yeah, I think he's I think he's bad. I think he's bad. He told me you'd say this, Certil, And I want to challenge you to be uncomfortable by paying for my stay. Is that even though I know that's like huge standing up rerself, but I think going back so anyway, um, he challenged her to do more things that make make her feel awkward or like things that she would be like, I want to get out of this. So she's supposed to do a breathing technique, she said, where it's like holding her breath for seven seconds letting it, like some kind of breathing technique that causes anxiety, and she's supposed to meditate through it to like trigger her anxiety in a safe place and then learn breathing like other techniques to get out of it. So it's kind of interesting. But she said that's too hard to do. So she went to this like mommy and me kind of like class with babies the other day, and everyone's introducing their baby's name around the circle, and she started hearing so many a rape names, you know, and she was like, so she introduced lee on just to make herself feel really awkward. Has Leon Arape. People weren't even saying last names, but I guess some people were saying, like, you know, two names like Chance, Hope or whatever like these dumb Yeah, she was Leona Rope and she said it was she felt so weird, but like no one knew of course, because it's well it sounds foreign. One's going to call you out kind of looks a little bit like like oh maybe that's a family name. Wait, so what did no one said anything? She just thought what did she say? No, she just said she was It made her feel so uncomfortable and so she had to get through it. So now she's she's so amazing. She like tackles anything that is put in front of her. She'll just like start doing like most people would go, like I went to a guitar lesson a the other day, and I'm supposed to like and I'm going to voice therapy, and she's gives me these practices that you have to do, you know, like when you go to physical therapy or like even a nutritionist or you know, trainer, you have to like do the stuff every day. That's why when I used to go to a trainer, used to just go to him every day because I go, I'm never going to do this stuff alone. There's yeah, so I've been doing the voice therapy, but like the guitar less and I'm not like doing I'm just playing what I want to play. I'm not doing what he wants to do, but she just like fucking does the stuff. So I was really proud of her for doing something so fucking weird. Yeah, guitar. When I when I started taking lessons, when they you know, scales and stuff like that, I'm like, can I just play crash into me nine times? You know what I mean? Like I don't anything. It's like it's the same. It goes back to the reading the book and learning about the clouds. Like it's like an extra layer of like why do I need this to get to the Like we don't like theory. I don't like theory, like the idea of what is it about? It's like, no, just can we get to A to B as quick as possible? I think that there and for what I want to do on guitar, I really don't think that I need scales, but I do believe that they help with like moving your fingers fast. For sure. They care about learning how to make a major key minor or how to like I just would rather memory. I is the entire freat board of like, oh the shape is down here, like that's how my brain works, better than being like, oh well then if I take this, this is an e that it becomes an F sharp and then it's like and then learning how like it jumps whatever that will will unlock like all these possibilities that you're not even aware of because you don't have that knowledge yet. But here's what I think you're right. Here's the thing, though, I do know how how to like make a chord shape in the in the first threat and then transfer up the neck and note what each of those are based on the chord shape. I know what that is now, but I don't know what notes go together. So even if I know that down here is an F sharp minor, I don't know what other. It doesn't matter to me what other chords like. I would rather The reason I know what chords go together is because I play thousands of songs and I've memorized that, like, oh, this song has these five chords, so those go together. And that's how I'm learning, which is a backwards way of learning, but that's kind of how my brain works better than the other way around. Yeah, I don't. I don't. I want to learn the minutia before getting to the broad thing. You just want to do it. I mean with golf, though it gets very detailed yeah, and then my brain. You know, for about seven months, I was like insane about breaking down my swing. I would think about literally, the golf swing seems so simple, but you could break it down maybe like thousands of ways. I mean, your body is hundreds of muscles doing all different things, like, but if you break it down to just three movements, just this, this, and then if you go back a certain way, you could come forward a certain way. That's the simplest thing with golf, you know, But no, I don't know. Well, I guess essentially like there are there is a way. But then when you start playing, if you're playing guitar, if you're you start overthinking and then you go you're not playing anymore. You're just fucking You're like a robot, like I have to go from here to here, and then you lose all your rhythm. You're too tense because then you're not going to play sometimes, like you need to be when you're an amateur, not that you're an amateur, but you need to be obsessive over the details to become a pro. Like it's so weird when you even though other night I was watching a stand up that is like very good, very good, and then I went to a clip of him ten years ago, which he was very good then too. That's why there's clips that exist of him. He was already killing it, but just ten years like, you just see this person that you go, that's a person who is worried about what's going to happen on the stage and a little bit nervous, even though he was killing it at that point in his career already, but there was just still some tenseness that was like not as funny, not as easy to watch as him now, which is just like natural born killer has no there's no there's no tension, and that's just about doing it enough. Yeah, I guess you have to learn those little things to forget them. You have to learn it. Holding my fucking pit is so hard, but it has to be they I'm gonna start running with one. I'm just gonna start carrying one around because I wanted to just be second nature that that's the fingers I used to hold to pick, even though it's so abnormal for me to just hold a pick with two fingers instead of three, Why does that help? Because it makes your hand looser if you're if you have three fingers, two fingers are touched to pick on the other side, it just makes your hand like and it's supposed to be like loose. I don't know it's that makes sense, but yeah, I mean it's it's like in football. If you fumble the football like they'd have people can carry a football everywhere. You just carried around. Yes, it's like it becomes part of you. Did you ever do the thing in high school or middle school where they make you carry the bag of flower or the egg to pretend it's a baby you start down the stairs. Did you have to do that? We had to do that. I'm trying to think it was a bag of flower. Did you have to do that? No? Me, no way. We did not have those kinds of classes in my school. The only way you get opt out of it is if you already had a baby. Wait now, I can I ask you question you on postpone the podcast today by ten minutes because you said you needed to wash her face. Did does it take you ten minutes to wash your face? I guess reapplying makeup and everything. I actually did not wash my face. I just put my makeup over the moisturizer I put on before bed last night. It's so funny you said that because last night I spent the night at Chris's for the first time in like I can't even remember. Yeah, away game, and we went to go see the Toady's the pageant. Do you know the Toady's Oh like the band? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I would rather have seen Little Tadpowls that are called Little Toady's. No, no, no, they were great. Actually they were great. They played this whole album. It was kind of like, oh my god, like they started, they went on. At ten, Reverend Horton Heat opened up. Do you know that band? Good for you? If you don't, Oh my god, I'm sorry. Reverend Horton heat Is. You're my least favorite band, and I'm probably your least favorite comedian. It's not it's like rockabilly. I'm not into rockabilly. It was like zoot Suit, Riot, Cherry Pop and Daddy's But it was like Cherry Pop and Grandis. They're very talented musicians, good songwriters. Not my favorite. Can I just say though? They really were? I mean like they were I was he was amazing. They were amazing. It was three three piece band. But um during report and Heat we I just want to say, during Reverend Hord and heat, I'm so not into it and it hurts my ears so much. I can't believe what people do to their ears at these places. I always have um my earring. My hearing has become extraordinary sensitive recently. I don't know why, but I read this girl from Love on the Spectrum on the American version. She posted about these um ear but like, what are they called ear head? Yeah, you can wear because she's like, I have really sensitive hearing and sometimes like people's voices just loud like us is, and I have these and so we got these little ear plugs that have been great. Um because even yesterday I was in like a meeting and this woman was talking and her voice just became so loud and obnoxious. I was going to have to leave. And so you can't put them in midd She had no idea. This woman was so fucking tapped out. But I just very surreptitiously just was like, look like almost like I was like kind of digging in my ear. So Matt Robard weren't neat. I'm not enjoying it. So I put in my air pods and I listened to my Girl's Chat because there are a bunch of recordings on there that I hadn't heard, so I'm starting I'm trying to listen to Sarah Lena talk about Leona Rape and um, and I can't really hear because they're so fucking loud, and you know, I'm at a concert and it's just like not the place to do it. So I put it back, my headphones, the ear plugs back in, and then um. It hits the intermission and there's this like older man sitting next to me, and Chris goes and talks to his friends. So I'm holding down the fort sitting there, and he goes. He tapped me on the shoulder, and I thought he was gonna recognize me because I had gotten recognized a couple of times there, so I'm like yeah, no, I was just like yeah, and then he was like, did you really put in your headphones and listen to other music during that person's performance? You could tell this guy was like because this everyone there was like kind of older. I mean, this is a band that was big in the nineties, so everyone's older. So I knew he was looking at me like a millennial who's like so like so rude at a concert to listen to someone else's and I go, no, I just I don't like them. They were bad, and so I U they were not my style at all. And so I put in my headphones because I wanted to listen to my voice memos from my friends. And he goes, oh, and he goes, do you like um the Toady's And I was like, my boyfriend's a big fan. He goes oh, and I go and I mean, I listened to him today. I'm excited to hear them. And he was like yeah. He goes, yeah, Yeah, I guess you're right. They weren't like He was like, I like the first couple of sounds songs and then it was just like a wall of sound. I was like, I just couldn't anymore. And he got on my side. Like he went from being like he you know, you could tell us what he was bitching about me the whole time to his wife and she was probably like, don't say anything, damn, please don't. And then he did and you could just tell he like went from being like I changed the narrative of me. You found common ground, yes, and he agreed with me, and and and he because I have every right to not enjoy a performance. And I listen, I'm not in the front row. This is we are in the balcony, in the back seat. There's no one even behind me, so no one saw me do this, besides this man sitting right next to me. And I just didn't really care. And I know that's rude. I just didn't care for this band and it was too loud. And so anyway, afterwards, we went to Chris's and I woke up this morning and I did not, um wash my face. And man, I think most people don't like, do you not wash? I washed my face night and morning, no matter what. And it's just weird that both of us today did not wash our faces. Yeah, it just depends how oily I am when I wake up. To be honest, I was a little sure, brain, did you not bring cleanser? Um? We use the same cleanser, so he I could have just grabbed his and used it, but I was like, I just need Starbucks and I need to get the funk out of here. Um, and I had really bad dreams about just yeah. I just was like, and he was at radio so and I just kept being something about being in a house. I felt like I could be murdered because it's so big, Like it's just like home. Invasions are so much more like in an apartment complex. I feel safe because there's like a bunch of people around you. It's like a buffet the house. I don't think I ever want to live in a house. I think I'll be too scared because no one can hear you scream. I mean some of these houses where by where we live, they seemed like it seems way too open. You're on a main road. I freaked the funk out. I look out my window every day and be like, oh, I don't know, but that's what they did. The mccloskeys lived right next to us. The ones the gun tote McCloskey is the ones that came out during the Black Lives Matter parade. That's the That's how you would be in your anyway. We gotta go to break. We'll come back with more show right after this, and we're back. Welcome to the show. Um, let's get to the news. It is Thursday, folks, you know what that means. It is Thursday. I hope you're having all the swells out there. It's gonna be a great weekend, great weather where you are potentially maybe not maybe you'll be raining back to you know, it's one of probably the last weekend of niceness. Oh likes the country. Well, no, it's going to be hot forever. It's it's so nice here. I can't even shut up about it. But it's it's just perfect weather because you guys had probably it's such a hot summer tucks in. Yeah, but it's fine. It's only today, Like only three dogs died in the sun today. It's so perfect. I cooked my breakfast inside today, not on the sidewalk. I saw a cactus shivering. It was so cold. That's so cute. Cactuses shivering, like just it taking its big arms and then crossing them and going like but I know, and they have like all those spikes, like I feel bad for like that, or like like really muscular men, like they can never hug themselves. Yeah, it's never comfortable. Each spike is like their dad telling them they're not worth it. Poor Catt. You know, porcupine and cactus should hang out more often. Oh my god. The other night, can I just say, Chris and I were I don't forget what we're doing, and he thanked me for something and I go anytime porcupine, and he was He laughed, so it was like a sustained laugh for like a minute, and he was like, don't ever say that again. So now I just send him. I send him means all the time that just say any time, and then a picture of a porcupine after it. Anytime porcupine, so cute, any talent porcupine at Tampa. I know it would be my catchphrase if I was a wholesome figure. See you later, alligator. Yeah, it totally is. Any time porcupine. Hey, you guys, take it and run with it. You don't even have to give me credit. I'm sure about. The first person was all right, what's the news? Noah? Okay, So a study finds that people prefer that an opposite sex friend be more ambitious, intelligent, attractive, and of higher social status than a same sex friend. Yeah you know why I thought about this, Okay. I think it's because because why would I want a man that I'm friends with to be more attractive, smarter, more successful than a woman I hang out with? And it's because I think possibly, and I don't. I think I read the study and they did not say why they think this is or did they know? Because usually they give like a reason like why this could be And here's my you know, no degree theory, my English degree, but I got it through spark notes theory. When I go out with a male friend, people society will assume that that is my lover, and so under the assumption that other people have of my opposite sex friend, it's going to reflect on me if they think I'm copulating with this person. I need them, even if they're not to appear successful, handsome, and smart. Whereas with girlfriends, people don't assume you guys are banging. It's weird like even with same sex. At least back in the day, I used to only want hot friends, probably because I just wanted to feel associated with other hot people. Um, I don't know why. It's yeah, In in college, I was just like, if you were like not attractive, I wasn't. I was. I'd be your friend, but we wouldn't like my close guy friends are of you're the least attractive person. That was that back. Did you ever feel that way like when you're with your friends to do or feel like I couldn't be around April Macy. We went to Um Korea ones to perform for the troops. Which one I'm not going to tell you South or North, but I think you can guess. We went on the line TMZ line Um. Harvey Levin was there, so um. But I felt invisible, like I didn't even want attention for men back then, really, but it was like I didn't exist. I was with Ginger Gonzaga who plays who She's on she Hulk now she plays the character Nicki and She's she Hulk, and April Macy and it was like I did not exist, and it was it was awful. And there are also times where I'm like with Sara Lena, and you know, I have a complex about this from my sister growing up of being like so pretty and everyone having to talk about it. But man, there were times that I would have like crushes on guys. I think I've even told you this, Like at the Seller and I Sara Lena would drop by and I'd be like, guys, I think I like this guy, and he'd be like hanging out and then Sara Lena would drop by and we'd all be having fun, and then Sara Lena would go to the bathroom and the guy would go, oh my god, she is so beau. I can't even be around her, Nikki. I can't even look at her. It's insane, and I just go, well, this is over whether or not you It's a good test, right, get you out of the thing is they should be allowed to say a woman is extremely attractive and not have it mean that they don't want to be with me, Like I definitely think that Chris could and probably anyone I date. I might love the way I look, but can admit that there are women that are more sexually like appetizing, and there's where they don't think they can They're either too close to you or they don't think they can get you to bet when when I hear she's but she's a different it's a different league, Nikki, She's like an age that I'm just saying that they think you're boys, Like that's what it used to be with these guys. I would like be like, wait, are we gonna take this friendship to the next level? Like it wasn't even you know, it would be like a casual thing. And then I'd be like it was so triggering for when guys used to always be obsessed with my sister but I was just like, well, then you're not even looking at me that way. Like I would love to be a girl who gets up from a table and guys are like, oh my god, if anything, They're like, she had like so much salad in her teeth and it's so hard to go. Sara is beautiful, but um, I want to suck you. So what do you think about? Like knew that they would be horrified that they passed up, because they would, you know, like they had no idea they had a chance with me, that they had no idea. They fucking blew it at that moment. Like if you like, if you're around, don't don't let me just say, don't ever say a girl is so attractive around another girl. Don't. We don't want to hear it. It's rude because we all say we all value our looks, whether or not you've accepted whether or not someone's a model, and like you think, well, clearly, my friend isn't going to get else with me comploning a model. She's a model. We all know she's prettier than all of us. It's still rude. It's not been plenty of times the other way around, where if I brought around a hot man, you would tell me if the guy to handle it, No, no, I it is, but it is kind of that because just what for men. It's like I'm a little bit more sensitive to it now because I realize you guys are a lot more sensitive than I thought, because you don't really talk about how sensitive you are, so we don't really know. That's the thing, Like you guys get so upset about what guys do. Like So I had two friends, Aaron and Glenn, and they'd go out. They'd wear like theory button down shirts and they'd have like one have highlights. They're both six one six, And I'd go out and I'm not an ugly guy, but compared to them, it was just like automatically the eyeline of the like hotter, taller girl, it would go towards them. Then I would just instead of like dealing with it or whatever, I just get as drunk as possible. Didn't want anyone in a weird way. You were sexual, Andrew, I was a sexual, But I think part of that of feeling defeated before like led to that, Like I didn't even want to compete. I didn't even want to get the idea of rejection, So I just get as fucked up as possible and then you know, have sex with a lamp post, and even the lamp post like I was Glen, he's taller. Yeah, I'm like, fucking lampost. You have to stand on like a newspaper dispenser to even get in the hole. And they're like, Glenn wouldn't have to do that. It was all in black and white in the rain. For some reason. It's so sad, No, but yeah, I think like guys, that's how guys deal with these things. They just get fucked up. And that's what I used to do too, is just get sucked up in like also just you know, I go to like I'll just kill myself. Like what's the point of being alive if no one's gonna want to fun? If everyone wants to be with beautiful women like and I can't be that? What why do I want to exist? It's the only thing and I still have a little bit of that in me. It's so weird, but it's um. I was thinking about this whole, like, I I feel like, you know, Chris has Chris went to lunch with a girl recently that was in town, and like, hit him up and I'm like, who's that that you're texting? I saw a girl's name and he's like, oh, it's my friend from whenever ago. And I'm like, I feel like there's just a sense of like is there either she likes it, there's but there was no sense. He was just like, oh, she was an old friend and um and maybe they had a history together. I don't want to disclose that, yes or no, but there was a reason. Most women, I have to say, would get very jealous. And I'm not saying I'm like, maybe I'm wrong. I think that most of the women I know would not be totally fine with their boyfriend going to lunch with a girl that they've never heard about in the nine years we've been dating. Yeah, I have a question. Yeah, does it it being an old because I feel like an old friend is like somehow more palatable than a new girlfriend, Like, oh, I met this girl three days ago, We're going to lunch. Like if there's history there, you're more okay with it. Yeah. Well that's the other thing is like it sucks that friends of opposite sex. It would be like, well, then bring me to and it's like, well, I don't want to bring you to everything that I do in my life. And let's say I meet a new friend that's a girl and she's like, I want to bring my boyfriend. If I were to say, can you not bring your husband or your boyfriend, it wouldn't mean I want to fuck her. Yet when a girl wants to hang out with a guy and says can you not bring your girlfriend? Somehow that means I want to fuck you. And so the girl, like a girlfriend, will take that as oh, you want to be alone with him. It's like, yeah, because I like to be alone with my friends. When other people get added on later on, I like to still be with that. Like I'd like to hanging out with Krison her husband, but I prefer Krisen without her husband more. Sorry, Corey. It's just and because it adds, it doesn't. It just creates a dynamic is different. But if you think about it, if you're if you have friends that are of the opposite sex, if you want to hang out with them alone and you go, hey, can we just hang out alone and not with then it's like, oh, you clearly to fuck him, and it's like no, I just don't want the partner. Because things change when there's a partner there, but it changes everything. But I was going to say is that I was like a little bit like, Okay, you're gonna go hang out with this girl that I've never even heard of, and you've known her longer, like you know, she's an old she's a sister friend of a old she's a sister of a friend that you know, they went through stuff together, and so it was just like, Okay, if she's hotter, are you more upset? Told me that there was no vibe with them, and I trust him and even if they're I mean, that made me want to see her less. Brennan had a dream that I cheated on her and but the girl wasn't as attractive as her, so she wasn't as upset. And I was like, that's an interesting way to look at it, because part of me would be like I would want if to be more attractive, because then it's like, well, I understand your value, yeah, like I give I put her on a pedestal. Now is someone that I don't think that's attractive get to you, then I feel like, well I would go what's wrong with my personality? Like you went for someone less attractive than that means that they probably have some kind of winning spark about them. That is, maybe I'm thinking I'm more attractive than I would want Chris to be with someone more attractive than me, so that it's like that's a reason to go, because like I can't offer you that interesting, you know, like I can't offer you that waste? Do you want to whatever it is? Whereas if it was like I just want to be with this girl that's like doesn't have the things that I know he likes in a body, and I'm like, why are you with her? Then it means that there's something else there, which is so much more devastating because we lose everything else and we also lose that eventually because your mind goes. But um so I let him. I didn't let him go, but he went to this lunch and it was so awesome because after the lunch, he like I knew he was going to lunch this day. I was kind of thinking about it a lot, and even though I just I just was like worried that this girl, I just have a fear that like, even though I trust him and I and I even if she did do this, which she didn't do, but even if she did try to go after him and like sabotage our relationship and like just plant seeds of like well, I heard Nikki say this on a podcaster, like just shitty things that I know she could say to get him to maybe be in a fight or like be upset with me. I was just like I was just thinking about it, like I just don't want her to try to come after my guy, and she definitely did not. That was not their vibe. But afterwards he was able to hang out with someone, a friend who was able to talk to him about emotions, because that's what a women do. Women ask what's going on in your life. They don't just talk about what new bike gear you got. They don't just talk about what sports thing is going on. Men need women friends. Encourage your man if you trust him to have female friends, because he is going to share things emotionally with that woman because women naturally are more emotional that he will not share with you because you're his girlfriend. And it's just you don't even want those emotions. You don't want that mixed up in your romance because it's gonn it's not you don't want your guy to cry to you and too so he you know you want that, but like a lot of that is a boner killer in a relationship. The man feels really like soft afterwards if he cries to his girlfriend and the girlfriend kind of feels like, oh now, I he's not as like there's a lot of weird stuff going on. Encourage your guy friends to have girlfriends. Because my guy came back to me and was, like, we just talked about a friend that we lost, like a mutual friend that you know, we both like had a fall like you know, died and not falling out and died, and like we both got to like talk about our feelings about that, and I just got to share some feelings around this other thing that I haven't been able to talk to anyone about because she kind of related to it because we know the same people. And he was like a totally like chills to stare. Pearl talks about and mating in captivity. Really, your partner can't be everything for you, so you have to have other social circles and friends and stuff and men because going to Hooters to watch you know, uh m m a is not going to get your man to talk about his feelings. So men, men need female friends. So I'm encouraging Chris. I'm like, go, I mean I would not. I don't care if he has female friends. I want him to have more because he comes back to me a more relaxed, chilled out, emotionally vulnerable person that he because he got things. I didn't say it to him at the time, but I'm listening to this being like, that's because you hung out with a woman. Like He's like, it was so good because I talked about like my feelings about this thing, like I suffered this like loss that I don't think I really ever talked to anyone about. And I was like, oh, because it's a woman. You talked to a fucking woman, and like orgasm Emotionally, it's like now I could just relax with the person I didn't talk to those about that stuff with me. You. I feel like there are women out there or men that are like, oh, you went to this person about this, but you woantn't come to me, and they don't want them to go to you with this is what I'm saying. But I get what you're saying. For the man and the woman, like he whenever there is like an emotional like um release between us which I'm always like super horny for if he you know, there he does not feel frisky right after that, if he's like just like cried about you know, like about it in a in a way that seems like a little bit more feminine energy. He is not wanting to like throw me up against the wall and ravage me. It's like it takes a little bit. So I think it's a plea home frisk gear. He just um, it did what it what it did was it did It made us closer. It made me feel so much more relaxed around him because I could feel that there was like he needed to talk to someone about about this thing that might have been permeating his personality for months. So many times I've talked to you over the years where it's like I thought I had a perspective of like what the girl was thinking or what you know how and it's just completely changed or I thought of it in a different way. To help me tremendously, because you already opposite sex, because you can put yourself in their heels well not even about not even like women stuff, just like any life stuff like But I do I do get what you're saying. We're the woman will be like, well, why can you talk to her about those things? But you really you want your man. You I want my partner to be able to have to keep his own counsel, to be able to share things with someone that he doesn't share with me. Like yesterday went over Chris's house and he had an alarm clock that is one of those ones that lights up slowly tweet you up and I go, when did you get that? And he's like, I don't know, and I go, and we always my new thing is to go how much research did you do on that? Because he's like the other day had a yoga mat and he's like, I've done I did ten hours of research before I found this. Like he finds the best of everything, and he's he's he was so much times researching stuff that he uses less time than he doesn't. Go who is this guy that hasn't light up alarm clock? Like that is a specific for that. I was like, you know, it just like lights up so that you wake up almost like with the world. Like it's almost like I had it this morning because my my sleep ass fell out off during the night and then he woke up for radio at five in the morning and I woke up to this like light coming on, just like and it was like calming. I like woke up and I was like, hey, where were you going to ready for? Like I was just like kind of like waking up in like a campsite. Like I was just kind of like I'm going to go to the stream and wash my face. Like it was just a gentler wake up. So he's onto something. But I felt like, who are you? I was like, I don't know this guy. This is something you would have been talking to me about, like I'm gonna buy an alarm clock. It's going to be this light up one. It just felt like, oh, there's facets to this man that are not my business that he has kept to himself. There was something else the other night where I was like when did you start doing that? Like you picked up that light fixture? Like when did you do that? You're a guy who picks out light fixtures? And why did you like get flushed? What are you talking about? Flush with the wall? I don't even know what these words are. It was like, I love when I uncovered things about my boyfriend, and there's a part of me that goes, why did you tell me about this. Why didn't you tell me that you have been training? But it's like, not, I have so much ship that I keep secret, not secret, but that it's just like it's not it's it's mine or it's something that I share with one of my friends, and he doesn't give a funk. It doesn't really he doesn't need to know. It's not gonna make a relationship better. So I think that like this idea, like you're saying about your partner needs to be everything, Like they don't need to be everything. We should want our partners to be multi vested, to have their own lives and be able to I would totally be fine with Chris going to dinner with another woman he met who's just like I don't know, and yeah, you can come along sometime. But to be like, I don't even need to go go hang out with your friend. My dad the other night, I'm talking to my parents about this, and my dad was like, yeah, like, your mom won't let me be friends with this girl I just went down the street. You're not You're not being friends with who. He's like, she's into archaeology, she's in an anthropology, she's into like the same things my dad is into she's like an older woman. My dad would never cheat. He has never cheated and they've been together forty years now, Like, but she's still jealous. My mom gets jealous when she hears about when my dad will talk about his um middle school girlfriend bringing him flowers when he fell off a building, and she's like, oh God to hear this, oh talking about Sally. I think like with guys, I think in a relationship, especially if you're living together and you do get a lot of time together, to then go at least for a man, I'm like, I wanted to go play golf with another guy. I don't want to talk about emotion and that's why I think guys lean into going to Hooters. And like, I don't even want to fucking think about my dad uncle at all. I just want to talk about Maximum magazine or whatever to feel like men create. There are things that you can talk to women that you're not banging about more so than women you are banging. And it's I agree with that. I'm just saying, like to find the time to also than at like, but like what I was saying is like a new friendship with a girl is when you're in a relationship like your mom with this archaeology shouldn't be is what I'm saying. It's women needs to snap out of this and like either you trust your men or not. But like women, men are, we need men to have women friends because men are suffering emotionally. They don't talk to each other about their feelings. They can't talk to their partner about their feelings because their partner is either a jealous bitch clearly or or like or it's gonna it's gonna be a boner killer and they're just not comfortable with it. A woman they're not fucking and have no intention of sucking is a perfect outlet for them to have emotional um their emotional needs met in that way that is going to actually make your relationship better. I'm just trying to think, how does a guy organically meet a new woman? Like maybe at work it's never going to happen because this is like it just doesn't happen, But I think things need to change, just like however would like it just well, how do you meet a guy friend on the golf course? I don't know, no, no, I know, I'm just thinking, like, how can it happen? An organic, like nobody. I don't know, like how do you how do you girlfriends before? Where it's just like, but how did you meet girlfriends before you had a girlfriend? So comedy, No, I get it, That's how I would meet it. I guess how it's possible. I'm just saying, like, but for comedy, I feel like it's also easier, Like we're in a social kind of if you met someone at work and you're going to lunch with her and not telling your wife, tell her that's the thing, Tell her what a guy friend. I just saw a video on TikTok of a woman showing up and the guy was cheating, and it is the most awkward thing, that old cheater show. I mean, it goes both ways. I don't. I will not be with a man who will not let me have my male friendships independently where I can go to dinner with a male friend and it not be like even if that male friend he suspects wants to suck me, he knows that, Like, in order for that male friend to suck me, I have to allow him to fuck me unless he's a rapist, which I don't hang out with rapists. He needs to trust me yeah, if if you if he wasn't a comedy guy, if it was like, No, I met this guy, Dave. He works in finance. He's fucking gorgeous. He has like it's a little stubble on his beard. And we're just like talking about emotions, something in organic to like. No, I'm just saying, like for it. Think everyone just needs to relax. Yeah. I think it's just we're all so jealous jealous, we're all worried. All Right, we're gonna go to break and we'll come back with a couple. I want to do some more news stories because we had some good ones. We'll do a that or back, um, one more news story now, huh okay. A woman has confessed to stabbing her younger sister in the heart multiple times after learning that the sister was flirting with the other woman's long long distance boyfriend through a video game. And the reason I picked this article was like a very long way of asking if you and Laura ever or Andrew, you and your brother's ever like the same woman, or you and Lauren like the same I gotta just wonder, like, if you were to stab me in the heart right now, where would you stab? I? Know where because of I've been stabbed and I thought it was my heart. Oh that's true. So I know from experience from well, I used to think because of the pledge of allegiance, it was over my left tip. That's right in the middle. It is left. It's kind of a little Yeah, it's more center than pledge of allegiance. Yes, yeah, I pledge the leading should be right down the midd But if you're stabbing five times, you're going to hit it. You're you're in that region. Yeah, I mean I would hope. So so this girl in the middle of the night stabs her sister and then she was going to kill Yeah, the sister died and she didn't turn herself in until the next night, and she was going to take her own life, but then her sibling talked her out of it because that sibling was like, I'm not losing two sisters in a night, even though, I mean, what goes through someone's mind. She ordered these knives on Amazon. By the way, she ordered daggers on Amazon. They found out She found out that they were not even cheating, flirting on a conversation through this video game chat where the boyfriend said I love you to the sister, and the boyfriend was probably cat fishing. He's probably like a six year old woman in like, ye, Savannah, you know what I mean, Like that's all about like no, yeah, yeah, no, it could all be nothing. It's but this woman because there was pre planning, there was an Amazon purchase, there was like, oh she got prime, she picked him, you know, a time to Yeah. I don't understand this whole premeditated verse whatever, because people you can be crazy for, so it doesn't matter if someone had premeditated you. That doesn't make sense either, because it goes back to the Sam hearstoning. No matter what you do, it's something happening in your brain that you're not in control of. So we're all idea of like we are. Anything you do is not really your fault. It's your brain. And like the situation you were born and no one chooses anything, and if you temporary, temporary, insane or whatever. I've never been a fan Like any time I hear that, I go, how is that insane? And they're gonna say this girl is not insane because she ordered like went and read you know, review she was like pierced three. Yes, she did ten hours of research. She her sister should have set that alarm clock for a little bit up earlier room. So she stabs her five times in the heart. Her sister bleeds out and dies, and then she just lives. She just keeps going, like did she hide the body? I think she was freaking out the ust. I mean, she was going to kill She just left it there. She was going to kill herself and then her brother or sister. I forget who talked her out of killing herself with if you I don't I feel like with the proliferation of murder podcasts and you know, Dahmer and all these shows on, like murder shows, don't teams. No, I mean she's twenty, don't people know you're gonna go to jail forever. I think that's the insanity part you don't think about exactly. So that means this person is insane. Anyone who kills my rage? Yeah? Yeah, But she ordered it on Amazon, so the blind rage. But this is a this is a great commercial for Amazon. They go, do you want to still plead temporary insanity? We're going to get you those knives within an hour, So you could still order something on Amazon and had it shown up within an hour. That has happened, been there before I even ordered it, just anticipated killed my boyfriend. You can, Yeah, these knives come with your boyfriend's hearts. So it was so a while that she researched daggers. Daggers. You're no one's ordering a dagger, by the way, unless they plan on killing their brother or sister. Dagger that comes with that. I wonder if the dagger company is going to find out about that she, like this person used, I would love to know, like if that if she left a review. I mean, you know, it's what did she do with the body after? Did she just let to sit there? And then she turned the night and then she didn't. She didn't call the cops until seven thirty pm the next night, so she probably was just all day like I gotta kill myself and but just couldn't. This guy couldn't find her own heart. New to sister right like they had prior conversations like and she's still like jealous, rage, I'm going to fucking murder You answer your question, yeah, Lauren, And I definitely, I mean that was my biggest thing in life, was like every guy I liked would be like your sister is so hot and like it was just but um, yeah, I mean I don't really like the guy. Yeah, I mean there was you know, there was a guy in college. She was a freshman, I was a junior, and he was in my grade. We had gone to high school together and she had a you know, she um dated him, and he was a guy that I liked all my freshman year, all my sophomore year and then junior year. My sister before and I don't really know that she knew. I don't. I don't know that she knew. But I remember when I found out that they got together. I called my dad and I was on my carpet in my dorm room. Maybe she was visiting because I was in my dorm room my sophomore year, so maybe she was still a senior. Yeah, you had to go to sword buying yourself. Yeah, I was deeper. You're like, maybe I shouldn't just waiting for a cut Co salesman to show up at my door. Um. I called my dad, and I remember like knowing it was inappropriate to call my dad about this, but just I was drunk and just so upset, and I was just like, she's so it's prettier at this guy that I like, they just talked up and it was just like my dad just like what like, I didn't know what to do with it. And I remember at the time, you know, when you're in the middle of a tantrum and you're like, this is not a good look and we're never gonna talk about this again. After I hang up the phone, it was one of those why do you call your mom? I'm just wondering, why do you think? I'm guessing she was incapacitated at the time. It was I remember it was like if I was drunk, she was probably It was like a Friday night. It would have been two girls just being like no, yeah, I don't think I would have my mom would have gone, oh, give me a break. This is ridiculous. You, Nikki, you don't want someone who doesn't want you, You know all that bullshit that you're just like, Yeah, that doesn't really help Nikki safe your sex. You don't want to be easy for these guys. You need to hold out, do not. You're giving this guy too much. What happened? Did you have a converence age with Lauren or did you have a conversation let it go and then eventually, you know, they fizzled out, but it was it was hard. Um yeah, I never said you're how close are you with your an age gap? Two years? See that's so close, like you're bound to cross the Yea swords or whatever you call them anyways, but yeah, yeah, my older brother, he's on the three years, so we didn't really there was a little bit of like you know, when he was a senior as a freshman in college, so there were girls that would like him that I would maybe, but nothing that I like, never competitive, never competitive with that stuff. And then my little brother six years younger, so that would have been illegal for a while. Uh yeah. Luckily, my sister and I never really went for the same type of guy, and I feel like most of my friends it's that way as well, like we all like a different type. Even though my two best friends, Hala and Taylor, who you heard on the podcast this week, Halla ended marrying Taylor's high school boyfriend. So interesting, but that happened years later. So it's so funny because Taylor and I were going through our old New yearbooks and Taylor saw this, like when she Taylor was a senior when we were juniors, and she left like a message to all of us being like Nikki, you know, like going to Walgreen stressed up, like all the fun memories and like Kirsten, remember remember when we slept in that car that one time. And then she wrote Johnny Cakes, which is Halla's now husband. She's like, Johnny Cakes, I will love you forever, and it's just like so funny. We're reading this was like emotional thing, and she put it on the girl's chat and like Halla, who was married to this guy, is reading about her, you know, one of her best friends talking about like I love you forever. Do you think do you think women are a guy? I don't. I just think about if a good guy friend dated, how long you would have to be in between for me? You know, like it would it would be it would be hard for me to still be I had a guy, a fraternity brother, date the girl that I dated in college for three years. But for Trinity, brother means nothing. This means blood. It was, but it's an elephant walk. It's not gay if it's the friend, Oh my god, yeah that sucks. But it's like, I don't know, I feel like if you're gonna like pursue someone to like fall in love with nothing should stop you and the person should be okay with it. Like I have a friend right now who's dating someone and their ex boyfriend is so upset that they are dating someone that they that they because it's a boy a friend of this ex boyfriend, and he won't even talk to her anymore. Isn't friends with like they were friends for a while. Now he's so mad. It's like, is this how you want to get the girl? Is by being a little bit and being like, I'm not gonna be friends with you because you are good with my friend. Do you think that's gonna work for I mean, who knows, But he's like so upset about it, Like I think that's weird. Like once you're done, you should be able to date whoever you want, but dating Chris, yeah, maybybe the the guy just still has some feelings and he's entitled clearly. But it's so interesting because I would never occur to me to respond that way, like that's that's not going to get her any sooner, Like it's almost like stabbing his sister. It's like, where do you think this is gonna get you? You're just gonna go to jail. Yeah, wow, look at that. I'll wait for you. What were you going to say about Chris? No, No, I'm just thinking about like like if we broke up and then one of my friends dated him, you know, because I'm not with him anymore, he still be friends with that person. Yeah, because I would hope to still be friends with Chris like I would. I would hope I would incur if Chris and I didn't work out seven years he had that Andrew, Yeah, because NICKI stayed friends with him. Yeah, I mean I have seven years of proof that we would still be friends and that I would date any of your friends. No. He actually I think one time his friend wanted to set him up with a comic who we all know, and he knows that I wasn't friends with her, but he knew that she was a comic, and he was like, no, because that would hurt Chris. Chris is very good about like even when we got together, he didn't want to post stuff because he was just like mindful of his ex girlfriend's being sad. YEA for me, I wouldn't want to date a friend best friend because that's like drama that I don't drama. Women are like I am so desperate for a husband, I will take it wherever I can get it. I don't care if my sister plays video games with this guy and that she's going to stab me in my sleep. Let's just do it, all right, Let's get to fan trax. Yikes, are you okay? Do you need to see doctor Titels after doing that to your throat? Oh? Boy, out, that hurts my throat, speaking of your throat. Of our first message is about just that. Here's our first voicemail fan Throx from Joanna. Hey, Nikki Andrew, Noah, Nikki, this is for you. I just had to let you know that the other night, UM was just about to go to sleep. My fiance and I were in bed, lights out, eyes closed, and usually we don't have much conversation because he falls asleep within seconds. I'm so jealous, but he just randomly said to me, He's like, I wonder if Nikki Glazer's voice is going to be different once she heals from surgery. And I just had to laugh because I think that was so adorable. But that's what he was thinking about right before he fell asleep. He's also a physician, so could be part of that. Like he's genuinely curious UM. Because he's not a bestie, I do occasionally make him listen to parts of the show that are like extra funny, and he is a fan of your comedy. UM. But I just thought that was so cute and adorable and we wish you'd best. Also, Nikki, you've been hilarious with the robot dictating UM one liners. I just think it proves how genius you are with coming up with amazing responses even with mega delays. So good job. You've made me Belly laugh more than once on the pod without your voice. So looking forward to your return. I love you guys back. What was her name? Joanna? Um? Okay, I just want to say thank you so much, Joanna. UM. That is so nice, Joanna. And that's so cute that your boyfriend Chris is the same way he falls asleep instantly, and it is there's something so adorable about the like the things that they say right before they go to sleep, or like something they mutter when you wake them up accidentally. And I am so tickled to be a part of that UM kind of conversation. And I got so many messages, I mean so many for people saying that UM my voice sounds like it went from like ten eight to four k. Or my boyfriend used to hate your voice because it was so squeaky. Or my girlfriend didn't like your voice because it was so squeaky. But now she really can listen to you, and then I'll take it. You know what if if if I went back to squeaky, then I might be But I'm not going back, baby, So yeah, let's leave that bit in the dust. Um yeah, everyone kind of has people who are sending me like, um, my one friend Amy sent me she listens to the pot. She was like the first time she heard my voices in the pot. And she sent me a thing that was like, I guess kind of a meme. But it was one of those couch d um what are the like like things called on couch that makes it all like rough and like have little balls of it, you know, like we're and couches and then you rub a thing over and it takes those balls away, so it makes you couch like freshing in. So that's what she say. Yeah, where it was like this couch what was it microfiber? Like let me just pull it up, hold on it was It was a perfect I was like really impressed with the example. She um, yeah, oh it says refresh your fabrics, removed lint, fuzz and pills from old fabrics to make your items look new again. And it's like this thing that you rub over your couch or whatever. And um, she was like your voice went from like and it looked like a couch that had like I went to scratched like a smooth and I was like top of it. Yeah, that your grandma doesn't let you sit on it. Um, the stale room. I think about friends that had that. Those rooms were so god and they had like a precious moments figuring like a little gazebo in the corner. That is just women are dealing with so many struggles. It is a miracle any of us ended up okay because of the you know, our parents generation was kind of fucked. But the one before that, no one got any emotional support. They were like, you know, spare the rod, spoiled the child, Like our parents were fucked. You guys, their parents did were once in a while. Maybe there was a breakthrough case of like some compassion and like actually caring about kids. But like, just cut your parents some slack because they were raised by literally like their whole parents, their teachers were hitting them. Yeah, everyone's hitting you. Yeah, and that's how you got hard. That's how you got tough. No one no compassion, no like are you okay? And this whole thing of like, oh these kids are pussies now because all that, it's like, good man. I overheard these two teenage girls yesterday that we're talking about Taylor Swift, so I really wanted in on the conversation. So I was already like eavesdropping in Starbucks and they were talking about the new Midnight's album and I was like, I had my laptopic when it has all these Taylors just sicker. So I was like, girls, I'm with you. I'm so excited, and they were like, we don't care, old lady. Um, you're weird. Like they looked at me like I was like a plastic bag lady, like just so weird. And then um, but I heard them talking in was like oh my god, like there was they were talking about another girl that they go to school with and they're like, yeah, she's a lot and yeah she can be really tough sometimes, but I think she's just been through has a lot of trauma in her life, and it was just like she probably grew up in a really traumatic household, and I don't know what's going on at home, so I just like, I don't like to judge. And I was just like, who are these teenagers talking about trauma? And like they're like, I just really need to lean into self care recently because I just felt like I've been really stressed there. So as soft as these teenagers are and woke and we roll our eyes, there's something very cool about teens that like are taking care of themselves, have compassion for others, have empathy for others, And I felt it from these girls. I was like so proud of these girls that, I mean, Kirsten and Taylor and I would be like cyber bully, not cyber bullying, but like bullying them in like notes where we would draw pictures of them and compare them to animals. They looked like, not knowing we were really bullying them, we were just being funny, Like she looks like we called one girl alone in Missouri just because she she just looked. That's and it's not even called her that to her face, just in notes, but like that's how we processed people that were different than us, and these girls are like, oh, she's probably been through a lot and has a lot of trauma, and I'm like, oh, man to get to that place. Yeah, I think there's obviously somewhere in the middle there of like you want jokes to still happen. You don't want everyone to be like like, yeah, that trauma. I was just like, I think I only heard that word on like or anxiety. I never heard it. I still can't say, right, but uh, people get mad there, Like everyone says they have anxiety. Now everyone has insie because you do get like and it's okay to say it now, thank god, because it because before that you just have panic attacks eventually and want to fucking think you're going to blow up. I'm still unaware of what anxiety looks like for me because I just don't I just know that it manifests into front people in different ways, and I just don't have that where it's like I can be anxious about something specifically, but I just never am anxious for you're overthinking stuff like whenever you're like I don't know, or if you're picking your nails like you pick, but it's usually about something like I know people that can get panic attacks where they're like it just came on. I don't know what it's about, and it's usually subconscious. But that doesn't happen to me. I don't feel got you like, so you can't put a pin on it. Yeah, but if I I've been anxious before where I'm like I have so much to do, I have to pack, I'm not ready, Like that makes sense. Okay, this anxiety, that's anxiety, that's why. But I know a lot of people that get generalized anxiety where they just start like there, you know, you've had it before, where you're like you feel like you're dying and there's nothing that caused because if there was something that caused it, like someone went up to you and was like, hey, uh people caused it. Isn't a thing that caused. What caused it was the million things before it. Yes, and then a little thing sets it off. Yeah. I thought I was choking like lint, so if you go it was that it was choking. No, it was me pinch in my neck today and it's something there's something right here. It's telling me something like it's just like it's just there's something I'm not expressing I slept on my boyfriend's pillow and I'm not used to it. Yeah, it means of my boyfriend researches yoga mats for ten hours, and I gotta accept that about him if I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you, how quick I've bought a yoga mat off of Amazon. It's literally it really was something that I go, oh, my god, baby used ten hours. Like, but you know what, that's what he likes to do, whereas I like to spend ten hours you know, comb Reddit, which he likes to do as well. But like we I just can't judge. I just have to go, Okay, you know what you like purchasing things that you know you've put in the work to get. And although I think that is a heinous waste of time, especially on something that you don't even use for ten hours, that is something you enjoy. No, I'm trying to think of anything I've researched, even expensive things I've bought, have been jerk on all my purchases. That's why I have a tailor guitar worth a hundred dollars that has a of her signature. That is why. So you know, when I had a lot of money. When I have no money, everything's knee jerk, whether it's buying a thirty dollar sushi roll or car. No, none of it was thought. I'm my whole life, my whole life. I mean, I'm a little bit more about food. I like to look at a menu and spend some time with it. But and you're you're definitely on the knee jerk. I'm you're mostly jerk side of things. Um, let's go to final thought. One more or two more fan thrax. Here's one from MICHAELA. Hi, Nikki, Andrew, Noah, and Chris. This is MICHAELA calling from Atlanta. I'm calling to talk about the leaving the saloon with wet hair. My mom is a hairdresser, and since my teenagers throughout my adulthood, I've been getting my hair done by her, and she absolutely refuses to dry and style my hair. I mean, she just says it's a complete waste of race of time and won't do it for me. And she wishes that she had more clients that would opt out. So I don't know if we are hurting their feelings if we're leaving the salon with wet hair. I think they may actually be relieved because it saves them time as well. So I thought, Nikki, I hope your vocal cords are getting the rest they need and jack me off, jack me off. Okay, how much more is it? I don't Sometimes they don't put a financial like amount on it. They should, and they used to always. I would guess it's about fifty extra bucks if you're going to a nice salon to get a blowout, right, it's like what you would pay for a blowout. Going usually takes. Honestly, when I blow drying my hair, and I don't know what they're doing differently, they're definitely doing it takes me about eleven to fifteen minutes to blow dry my hair, but for some reason, when I get my hair done, it takes thirty five minutes to blow dry it because they take each strand individually, and I mean, it looks a lot better than when I do it, but it just it takes along. And when I know I have to go for a run later that day, I just go, no, let's not do this. But I have to say, um, McKenna, I think that was her name, Michaela. Michaela. I get um, I get the sense that they're disappointed. Every single time that I say that, there's a little bit like are you sure you don't want it? Like if I was doing something business and then the person was like, let's, for instance, like say for me, it's a meet and greet, whether they're like, you don't have to do a meet and great? And I'm like, oh my god, really, like I wouldn't double up and go Are you sure you don't want to do the meeting? Great? Are you sure you don't think? The better analogy it would be if you were doing stand up and they're like, don't do your closer, like it's their closer, Like this is their finishing touch, right, Like if you're an artist or like your job perfect example, because it's like look what I did, whereas I because usually it's a die job and so and I'm not getting a hair cut. If it's a haircut, you definitely need to dry it to see what you're working with. But if you're just getting your hair dyed, and I get the same blonde every time time, I've literally never once had my hair dyed and not liked it. I am very easy to please. I do not research it at all. I will go to anyone, I will I just go blond. I don't know, and I look back at my photos. I've been every kind of shade of I've been Noah's blonde, which is like a very very light almost like you know, uh more, what do they call it? I see blonde? And then I've been like a golden blonde, and I just yeah, I've been a golden doodle. They have better air than me. Actually, they probably get more. So I feel so bad for poodles, by the way, why because that makes you with everything and no one likes them alone. I love poodles alone alone. In the Missouri everyone goes, yeah, poodle society because the one want to because you're not mixed with anybody. Just went there again, sad, what are you going to get? Oh, we got six pit bulls down there? Why did you go just to look at cats? Brenna wanting to look at cats, she wants man to have. Everyone writes us, so you got to get a second cat. Everyone's yelling at us to get a second cat. And between two cats and one cat two there's nothing. Cats are so low, mate, aren't they. I mean you don't even have to say maintenance because they're so low. They are little maintenance, but they're not like, do you still have to feed them? I don't know. I guess yeah, I guess them. You gotta feed them, you clean litter their letter box, you have to. But it says all in the same place. Yes. I feel like the jump from zero dogs to one dog is major. The jump from one dog to two dogs not so much. Third dog crazy. But cats you don't have to walk them. Maybe I get a second cat? Yeah, easy peasy. So I went there and it's God. The cats is fine. But then you go into dogs apartments wanting to if you have one cat, I think apartments go okay? Two cats? They're like, have you looked at apartments? Like that's the other thing I'd be worried about that places are cat friendly. But anyhow, what were we talking when we're talking about Okay, I have to play this voicemail from Ali before we wrap up. Okay, Hi, Nikki, Noah, Andrew, and Chris. I have a story about someone at a concert becoming my worst enemy very quickly. So it was a bumble date and it was actually our first date. We went to drinks before and everything was like sexy and funny and great. We get to the concert and he starts acting like out of this mind, like not on drugs that I know of. He's so hyped up, so like social with everyone around, but to the point where it was annoying people. And I'm just like a chill person, like, let's chill, enjoy whatever. Um. And we also kept bumping the clock clip that I was wearing on the back of my hair, so I had to keep adjusting my hairstyle every time, and he was like, what is that in the back of your head because the clock clip stopped touching it. So I got a little angsty, and he was singing the words loud and wrong. I didn't even know Um this artist very well, and I knew that what was coming out of his mouth were not the correct words. Major. I would recommend going on a first date at a concert because you see so many different aspects of a person UM and j J Juja Jack Johnson. Jack Johnson, UM seriously like better than a movie because the movie you gotta sit in silence. You hear about these first dates where people just act insane. You who could ever love this person? And who raised this person? I mean, and come messing with her clip? In her hair, like did you think it was flirting? Feel like yeah, because it's a concert and the idea. I'm so tired of people. Just talk to your date. Stop trying to show off by talking to other people and making it seem like, look how much other people like me. If you're one of these people, you are you don't have good self esteem and you need validation from others. Focus on who you're with, love the one you're with first date and obnoxious, like who comes into a first date so confident where they're like, I'm just going to be the guy. I want to go on dates again just so I can witness some of disagreedious behavior and just like what are you doing that? D Oh, they're so weird because you don't know the person at all and they can have so many personality disorders. Oh my god, and then you can't get out of it. I'm too nice. I've never had half a drink and been like this isn't It's all six hours later and I'm like, all right, well, dude, it was really nice to me. You need to start introducing your baby is Leona Rampe. It sounds like your people pleasing Oh for sure, that's my mom. The other day we were talking about my dad talking to strangers and how men love to talk to strangers and neighbors. Like whenever I go visit my sister at her house, I cannot I hate they always meet me outside. There was playing in the front yard, and then I have to talk to their neighbor who was standing. There's all these men that just start walking up and down the street to avoid their lives and wives, and so they walk up and down the street and then they make small talk with my sister and her husband. Yes, what are you guys, What are you getting into this weekend? Oh would you do last night? I want to go, but the kids, yeah everything? You still got the old stroller as the wheels still broken. Like it's just the most benign banane, But now conversation reignant to me. And I told my sister. The other day, Matt went outside and he was talking to some neighbor and I go, I'm not going out there. I want to go play with the kids, but I'm not going out there because I know that person like kind of knows who I am. They get kind of nervous and they always have a baby that I have to act as cute and their little baby born thing, and I have to go, oh, what's her name? Even though I don't give a funk. And this is when I wasn't talking, so I was like, I don't want to like type out she's cute. It does. I don't want to talk to your neighbors anymore. I'm tired of having conversations like And I was telling my parents this, and my mom goes, your dad is the same way. He loves talking to strangers. He loves it because I used to be like in high school, I remember my dad be like, let's go to Stook. Go it's the grocery stories. Like I'm gonna go to Stooks. You want to come with me? I'm like, no, I don't want to see anyone I know. And he'd be like, what is wrong with you? You never want to see anyone you know? You never want to talk to people. I'm like, what is wrong with you that you do? You want to constantly these small talk conversations? And what was I going to say about this? Oh? My mom was just saying, your dad does the same thing, and oh, I go and she goes. And I always had to stand there and talk to these people will be on a walk and your dad starts talking to someone, and then I have to keep I have to stand there and listen this whole goddamn conversation. I go just keep walking. I want to empower my mom to be more like just it's okay to go, you know what. I want to keep my hurt right up. I'm gonna keep walking when I walk ahead. Let you guys finish this conversation. Like. It's funny when guys talk to it's like they're just sorry. It's fine when they're like when they're like, they just always are like showing off of like things they know, like about the engine or the wood or the wet Like everybody dad talked to other people. He knows it is, but just they're each talking about their own lives and never commenting on each other's lives. So reget how an uber driver who only wants to talk about himself, but he acts curious about you. So anything, he'll ask to be like, so, what are you guys in town for? We're performing? Oh, I used to perform. I'm actually uh, I used to do gigs. That was you know, John Lennon, impersonating. It's like and then he starts pulling out his tapes and you gotta listen to him. I mean, this is how men talk used to work on is listening and asking a question that pertains to the person you just ask a question from, and stop asking questions of people if you aren't actually interested in that thing. That is why I do not talk to people that I'm not if I ask you how you're doing it because I literally care, or because you just ask me and I have to just give it back. But I'm not asking people just questions to just fill silence. I can be in an elevator from floor twelve to one and not say fucking anything to the person next to me. Can you do that? I'm okay at that. At times I'll just go like yesterday, this guy came in with a bike and I have the same bike, and I got that bike times. He was like, this is four years old, though this isore. Yeah, it's different because the suspension is different and I don't know anything about I don't mind when people talk to me. If you're someone who's a chatty person like this bitch doesn't like to talk to me an elevator, talk to me. But I am okay if we do not talk, is what I'm saying. If I'm on a flight, I am okay not talking to the person next toime. You'll put the headphones in and listen to the Buzzy. Look at does Buzzy need a friend? Did you ever think about getting a secon cat? We thought about it, but uh, we're buzzies friends. He doesn't want any Buzzy is so freaking cute on the chair. He is so cute. Oh my god. All right, well we gotta go. Thank you guys for listening to the show this week. We will be back next week. Don't you worry about it. Have so much fun um this weekend. Go see Andrew tonight at UM. Well it's maybe too late. Well next month and Austin next month. I'm on the road a ton coming up Iowa at the end of the month, into um week after week after week of shows until the rest of my life. So go check out Niki glazer dot com slash tour and come to a show. If you buy a single ticket, I will give you a meet and greet comps if you um, but try to go with a friend you know, but if you can't, you can meet me for free. And if you can't meet me for free, listen, just damn me and say I can't afford it, and maybe I'll pump you up. But if you can't afford it, I would love to meet you and have you paid to do that, and I'll make it worth your while and I'll try your hair and have a you know, polite conversation about nothing with you in the front yard. Thank you so much for listening to the show. We'll be back next week. Don't be cook and Jack just check, Oh, just check? Can I like that?