The format takes a backseat but not in a car that Andrew is driving and trying to suppress his road rage in. Nikki learns more about memories from a Reddit thread that explains it like she's 5. They talk about taking criticism and the art of recalling and building jokes. Nikki and Andrew plug their tour dates in Vancouver and Winnipeg in April and share a fun fact about each place. They play a geography game before getting into a news story about a Bestie. In Top1 Bottom1 they discuss cereals and in the Final Thought they tease a lot of topics that they'll never get to.
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The Nikkia Yes here, n hello here, I am as Seniculator podcast. How y'all doing? It's Monday? Wow, God, this freaking weekend felt long. We've had a couple of days off of work. Usually we only get oh oh no, no, wait, what's day. I'm trying. Ever since my speech last week about not trying, and I really thought about how when people try in English, even if they know nothing, I'm always like good, like yeah, I've never once said to someone that goes my English very bad. I've never gone it is. I've always gone no, I'm like so impressed, and I've never not meant that even if they know literally only know how to say my English very bad. And I appreciate you saying that to me, or not saying that to me. To you about your English. I didn't even say that, right. Um, you know though I was reading less Yolo. Uh you know though I was reading last night about um, oh my god, who what what? Right? It is the only place where I get literally every talking point I have. It was some video and it was talking about how oh it was talking about memory. That's so funny. It was talking about memory and how it was It was explained like I'm five, and it was asking why do I always forget things that I used to be a master of? You know, a couple of months ago. Let's say you learn a song on piano, and then two months past you never play it, and you don't you don't know any of it. Um. And they pretty much they explained that I'm five, which is amazing because they explained it to you, like your five is that your brain needs to constantly make room for more information sation. So when you don't use another thing, like say you learned how to hunt for a certain type of berry, and you found the berry, and you ate the berry and whatever, and then a month goes by and you don't hunt that berry anymore. Well, clearly that berry didn't taste good. It didn't like fulfill you. So let's let's lose how we found out how to get that barried, because we gotta learn how to find more berries because the other And I was trying to play a song on guitar that I partised so much one week and I already forget all of the core transitions, and you know, you get it back, but it's it's it's slags and um. But anyway, they said about language. It made me think of Ilaria Baldwin. Now. One of the most damning videos about her being fake Spanish was when she was on The Today Show and she was talking, but she's doing a cooking segment and she is an you know, English speaking is her native language. She was looking at cucumbers and she was like, and then you put in um, how you say que number? And she struggled for cucumber. But a lot of people in this thread were saying that when they their native language, they forget certain words when they've been speaking another language. Pretty often. It doesn't even have to be like they've only spoken that language. It's like you forget. So I learned to cut her some slack that maybe she actually did forget the word for cucumber, because it was just so there were so many people going, I always forget like simple words in my native tongue. It is weird because like you can remember, I can remember certain rap songs or certain things that you never would think would stay in your brain, and then other things you can recall when you want to. It's an interesting because there's probably some songs that you probably learned around the same time that are still in there. Somewhere. So it's interesting that your brain gets rid of certain things and not what do you say to somebody who hate or anyone trying to one of rose all things in the bloody way to study a tape of n w A one day, I was walking by walking, I could be your hype man. There's seven different levels of devil worship and horses, human sacrifices, cannibalism, candles and extracisms, animals having sex with the cameras, manimals, and rabbits. But I don't get into that. I kick the habit. Wait, who that Shakespeare nine episodes? I like when you give it time stamp, which isn't even accurate. It might be right, I'm gonna go six episodes. Okay, that's on, way off. But anyhow, that's eminem in a song called dead Wrong where Billy's Biggie Smalls. Do you have a song in your head? Noah, go, I don't even think. I can't do it. I don't. I don't do like. I don't listen to use. You don't know what about candy man tempting without the Last Week to program. That was going to be my joke for a while, that that's The only rap that white people know is that Dave made and Joe didn't. What's the Naked Ladies one? Uh? Fuck, it's been one week, isn't that song? Yeah? I don't know. I mean probably trying to use that then because we can't remember it. But again, that's something Chicken to China. The Chinese were down the maze on this one the cars. That's so funny because I had no I lost it and then you said two words. I know that's what I needed. The other day when I looked up this chord transition, I needed one chord and then I remembered the because when I'm learning songs on the guitar, I learned like a pattern of like okay, then my hand goes in this way, then it goes over here. I don't go by sound of like that's that because I don't know what chords sound. I can't conjure it out of my mind. I just go like, okay, that song goes in a clockwork fashion, and then I memorized the patterns. It's weird how memory what you do to remember things? Like? Do you have any devices to remember things in your life? Well, it's interesting you say that because I was driving over here and I was just you know, sometimes I'll go over new bits in my mind to see if I can remember it for when eventually I do say it. You're so good about that. Um okay, I in your mind is amazing. Well, I was driving and like the new GRAMDMA bit, I just wanted to make sure I could hit. So what I do is like to remember it. I'll separate its little thing, but I'll separate it in paragraphs. So each joke, I'll just when I'm writing in my notes, just separate where it's new. So in my mind I separate it. Then. The other thing that I've noticed is that if I don't try to speed through it and just like let it come to me, well, don't try to push it. Yeah, I can remember things way easier. I think. Do you ever do The thing which I think you're hinting at is that you allow on yourself to discover where it's going the way you discovered it when you out it, like, of course that thing will lead me to the Grandma part when I say she's a hundred is going to lead me because when I think of someone who's a hundred, I think of that thing that is the that that's the thing I thought of when I thought of that joke where you just kind of count on that. When I was smoking so much weed and like performing it was I would say, you know, thirty times a show, I would be in the middle of a sentence and go, I don't know how this ends. I don't know how this And it's so much different than a song. You guys are like a just any sentence, like like you, let's say you're memorizing a speech you know, you're giving your company or something. I have to say that. I think comedy is more crucial to memorizing details because it's reliant on it being a joke at the end and if it's a specific thing, whereas if you know, you're like talking about and then our numbers last year, we're on a steady incline throughout the September. What I don't even think of any business words, you know, like you just make up things because no one's listening anyway, and it doesn't rely on them going. That's so funny you say that, though, because I think we both when we had to give speeches in school, for me, that's what you were doing right there. If I had to do that in front of like an office, would scared of them living ship out of me, maybe after I've done it a few times. I was just scared of boys ways to make fun of me the word. I felt bad that everyone in the room had to look at me and like I was probably like so ugly that like the boys like didn't We're like I don't want to look at her, miss grosses ugly. Like I thought there would be something like that of like, hey, you need to pay attention. Well, she's like ugly and I don't even want to. I thought was that was my biggest fear was that they were going to because boys always do that ship. I'm so tired, like boys do it all the time of like you call them on something and then they've instantly hurt someone to like deflect. I mean we've seen that a lot on perfect Strangers. Yeah, I mean within seconds they go from cool chill balkies like chill and then you deny him once and then you see his true murders and things. It's pretty interesting. It's people need to and I'm included in this. People need to be okay with being wrong or being or making a mistake, you know, like you know, sometimes you are talking during a presentation of a students and the teacher is gonna yell at you. That's a that's a normal thing to be reprimanded about. Sometimes you are talking too loud in a restaurant or something. Just suck it up and realize that you made a mistake, and you're allowed to make mistakes. You don't always have to have a defense. You don't always have to go. But it's because you were or well it's because I thought this thing, I mean driving here is own it and say, oh, yeah, I sucked up. Are you living in a world where you have never made a mistake. There are some people who walk around truly thinking that they've never done anything wrong, and we'll have an excuse for every bad thing that has ever happened to them. Every every time they've been arrested or pulled over or broken the rules, there's always an excuse. Sometimes you just hurt people's feelings because you get angry. Sometimes you just are an asshole. The other day I was defending someone you know online called me a bit and was like, Oh, she treats her family and all of her friends like such. She thinks she's better than them, and I was like, the reason you know this is because I put it on my podcast. You do the same thing you're talking about. I'm sometimes rude to my family. Oh you mean the meme that you see every Christmas when people around their family. I live around my family, I work with my family. I admit sometimes I get a little bit. I get either hormonal. This is not an excuse, by the way. These are different than excuses. Like sometimes I get angry and I am backed into a corner and I have no coping mechanism because I'm a flawed person that doesn't have it all figured out, and I lash out at the people I love and it sucks. But at least I could say that's what happens instead of going, well they deserved it. Well they came at me first. It doesn't matter, like just own some ship you guys, just not you besties, but like just being able to say a few of them, a few of the besties need to own it. Yeah, I'm sure there's a few of them. There's a few. I'm sure there's someone listening to hear who's gotten offensive about something. They gotta learn. They gotta learn when someone like cuts you off on while driving, and my first instinct is to, you know, murder. Their whole family want to do an impression of you. Yes, okay, what did you do? What? Okay? Well, then go will then go well, then go motherfucker. But then if I if I just get one of ease, and I know it's the cheesiest thing ever, but if a driver cuts me off and guess I'm sorry, And sometimes this is funny because his hand up you could like you could run over someone's dog, and then you're like, my bad. Like it doesn't work all the time, but pot can't be like, yeah, are you caring? My bad? I'd forgive him. No, I wouldn't, but I've gone on record and said I would forgive. Literally, it doesn't mean that I'm okay with what they did. And then I'm not still angry about the fucking ramifications of what they did. But I think anyone who goes my well, you know, this gets back into the Sam Harris thing and maybe the new listeners haven't heard me on this spield before. But like any time the book Free Will, he has this example of a crazy guy that shot up a bunch of people at the University of Tech sit in the seventies and he's from it. He was at a clock tower or something like that on campus and just picking people off, mass shooting, one of the like first big ones in the nation in modern times, I think. And everyone was like, you know, obviously this guy's the fucking worst, and let's throw him in jail and everything. And then I think he died. He died either during the thing or later on. And they examined his brain and they realized that there was a tumor growing on some part of his brain that triggered um that often triggers anger. Yeah, yeah, that pulls that triggers your finger to go to walmartin by a gun, and everyone goes, oh, okay, it's not his fault. It wasn't like, yes, he did something crazy. But whenever there's a tumor growing on someone's brain or they have rabies, let's say, and they attack everyone whatever it is. That dog had rabies, it didn't mean to attack, Whereas if a shark attacks a guy, it's like, he's the we have to fucking kill that shark. Yes, we kill an animal rabies too, but we have a little bit more sympathy for the animal as brabies. But if you open up anyone's brain after they murder someone, or if they cut someone off in traffic, after they lie to you and cheat on you, something in their brain that was not in their control did it. It might not be a tumor, but everything you do is your brain. So if we're gonna excuse people with tumors in their brain, we should excuse everything because none of it is up to us. Can I just say something? But that doesn't mean that I wouldn't want to stop that person and put that's different than stopping someone. Yeah, like, yeah, I guess forgiveness is different than stopping. Yeah, stopping You do it to protect the public, Yeah, you put you put? This isn't like oh no, we shouldn't put murderers behind bar. I mean there, that's preventative, but it's not punitive. We're not doing it to be like you're bad and we want you to suffer because you chose to do person choose to get molested by their dad and then fucking beat by their mom, neglected by their school, and then em, I know, what were you gonna say? Um? Going back to the criticism point that you were making, So I was a person who was not able to really handle the criticism, and I would react to it as opposed to respond. I now can take criticism, I can withhold a reaction, but I have a hard time responding to it. And I think that's where a lot of people kind of hit a roadblock, because it's like you just don't know how to communicate, Um, what you know that acknowledge? You give an example of that, Noah, Like what do you mean by how like how to respond to it where it's like not too vicious or not too soft. No, it's not even that, it's just kind of like, um, validating the other person. Like if let's say I do something, uh, I don't know. Let's say I'm I'm arguing with my partner, and uh, he has a valid point about my uh irrationality, which I know is a is a thing that I've been working on. But then I just it's like, Okay, you know what, this is something I've been working on, So here it is manifesting again, But I can't verbalize that he's right about it. It's it's hard for me. And I think a lot of people kind of hit that roadblock and they just tend to Why is that because you're kind of give me are you saying like, yeah, what's the what's the roadblock there? I know what it is. In my family growing up, um, we would just have arguments and then we would disperse. There was never like a conversation about what started the argument. We would just like slam the door, everyone goes to the room, and then two hours later we all meet in the kitchen and it's like nothing happened. We just avoid it. So I just don't know how to talk about it. It's very hard for me. Yeah, I think the key is two when when you get criticized about something, even if you're like completely like this person so out of line is to say, is to try to figure out how because I've dealt with this too with my partner of like not understanding how they could feel that way and being like but I didn't mean to do that, so get over it, you know, and like what's the issue, Like I don't ever mean to hurt you, or let's say, you know, I think that it's about saying I'm really sorry that I made you feel that way. It's something that I'm working on, and clearly I'm not working on it hard enough. And these are important moments to bring to my attention so that I can be more vigilant about it. But I promise you, like it's something at this moment that's out of my control, and I would really like you to stay on me about this. And I know that it was probably hard to confront me. And I'm sorry that it makes you feel bad. It's just something that it's a way of communicating or whatever you did that I developed out of fear, anger, and sadness. So when I'm feeling those I go to like this could even be said for literally anything like if you get quite shoplifting, like I, this is something I've developed to make me feel better, and I know it's wrong, but I can't help it because I just don't. I need to stop. And the only way to stop a bad habit or a defense mechanism is to habit be shown to you. So as hard as that is, you have to like thank that person for being able to show you how you hurt people, because we have to be accountable to hurting people even if we don't mean to. And it's so hard. Its fucking sucks hearing that you are that maybe people have been talking about you behind your back, saying like you're like, and then someone finally can that's the That's the thing that really gets me is when people have been like it's been a conversation going on. It's an intervention of sorts where it's like, why didn't you just say this right away? Why am I coming up to We've all done the same thing. But then you realize it's because you have created a you don't see because there they have a fear of confrontation. So like, they're your fear that's causing you to be whatever way to them is stoking their fear of confrontation, and so they should have maybe brought it to you sooner. But also like it's it's but you, But that doesn't mean you get to be like, well, you should have brought this to me sooner. I'm I'm just fine doing what I do. It's like, he just there's this great book I'm reading called on Living I think is the name of it, and it was about living in the gray area of life. And there was a part I I highlighted to share on the podcast, and I'll do it in a little bit, but it's, um god, this book is so freaking good. It's uh yeah, On Living by Carrie k e r r y egan e g A and and it's she's a chaplain and a hospice and she's the person that goes in and like they just tell all their secrets to all these people at the end of their life and their lessons, and like it's just so much better than I thought it would be. I'm learning, like so much and it's exactly what we're talking about. Here is a whole chapter. But let's go to break. Andrew, I'm coming in all right, We're back. Hey guys, I want to remind you that I'm coming to Canada. We are coming to Canada very soon. I don't know who's gonna go with me to Canada. Adressing you, Andrew. We're coming to Canada April eighth and ninth, I believe are the dates. Let me just double cheerckt yep. I'll be in Winnipeg on April eighth and um on the ninth, I will be in Vancouver, So make sure you get tickets to those Thanky Glazer dot com. Um, I've been to Vancouver. I don't know that I've been to Winnipeg. I don't think I've been to Winnipeg. I've been to Vancouver. Very clean city from what I remember, Oh my god, so clean. I don't know why. I just I went there going to Alaska. I think I took a cruise and came back to Vancouver potentially. I just remember I saw Late Miss there for like the third time. Yeah, I've seen Late Miss in many different venues. Have you been a Vancouver No. I think I was with an ex on tour, but it was like probably like one day, so I don't remember much like this one night. Yeah, it's like, yeah, I just remember the shopping district has like a hill going up. There's like, yeah, there's yes on the water. Yes, there's a hill on the water. It's almost like San Francisco E kind of. And then I know that there's a huge population of Chinese there because uh, something to do with Hong Kong. I don't know. Someone was describing it to me of like there. And then I was staying over at the Weston, a beautiful hotel there. Anyway, it doesn't matter, Um, we're going to Winnipeg. Let Mesnipeg is there. Did you know that the Winnipeg is the capital? Oh wait, sorry, that was Vancouver. Winnipeg, though, is the capital and largest city of the province of what I would never get this man ester to b perfect. Oh my god, you didn't get perfect. Oh my god, I be capital geographically. Let me just look where Winnipeg is, just so I understand WHOA I had no idea. I thought Winnipeg was going to be on the west coast. Guess what state it's above? I have to look at what state this is, by the way, Um kinda, yeah, it's on the like if you like the border of Michigan and I'm guessing that's um fucking Montana or something south Dakota. I would assume it's west coast because that's where Vancouver is, and that's how you should do a tour. And I know exactly, I'm basic fact that my agents should probably schedule me so I'm not flying across a fucking continent. Okay, I'm doing two shows, you know. Sorry, I'll be fucking tired for your show. No, I won't be. I sleep so well on a plane. Yeah, Winnipeg is like straight above. Um god, it's gonna be cold as fox. Still Michigan and whatever state is next to Michigan at the very top. I don't know the United States as well as I should. Um yeah, and what else about Winnipeg. I just want to read some facts so we can learn something. Um you know what. My favorite thing to go to is famous people from there, but they don't have that on there. That's usually for colleges. Whenever I'm doing a college, I was like at notable alumni. And it's always funny to go like the man who invented the wheelbarrel handle. Just like, good job guys, University Rhode Island. Ye, Winnipeg, the bear. What do you got? What are you go? Okay, Winnipeg was the first city in the world to develop the emergency number. Whoa cool Winnipeg fact that came to America. That's really good. How many people were getting like stabbed? They're They're like, we gotta get a number. I mean, I can't keep dialing this long without you know what I mean? Whoa wait a second. Remember when I said last week I didn't know anything about Innuits. Yeah, well, the Winnipeg Art Gallery has the biggest collection of contemporary Inuit art in the world. There you go, interesting in in interesting, um Man, Winnipeg is actually pretty freaking gorgeous. Okay, sweet, So we're coming to Winnipeg and we're coming to Vancouver, and um, Winnipeg we know all these facts. Now in Vancouver we know it has a hill. So tell us what more we can learn. It's interesting now you can learn more about a city reading two sentences versus us going there for a year. It's insane. You know what I want though? When I go into the town, which we often get from like the drivers or whatever, it's like, what's the thing to make fun of here? You know, like, what's the thing that we can reference city? Yeah? I mean I have a choke where I just like fill in a blank of like the most crime the city, the part of the city. I always ask the driver, what's if you if your partner wanted to go pick up a Craigslist item from this part of town, which give me the part of town that you'd go, like you're not going there and I go. And also, don't make it a black thing. Don't pick the part of town where there's like like make it like the white, shitty part of town, because I don't want I don't want that energy. You asked me the other day where St. Louis was, Oh, this was hilarious. No, Um, you there a year and a half and on a map? Did you look at on the map? Now, I would say on a map would be cheat kind of cheating. But even on a map, I have trouble on a map. Can I just you? Can I send you a blank picture picture of Missouri and I want you to just point where you think we are. No, Can I ask you a question? Do you think I have too much skin between my nose and my top lip? Frae? The shape face? No? I think you look really good. I like this better than the goat, to be honest with you. Wait, you have more skin. What are you talking about? That's why I grow my hair on my face. My dad too, We just have to the colins have too much skin here and it's a normal amount of skin. Yeah, it looks great. Who told you that? Yeah? Who said that to you as a kid? That was it your dad? I don't know. My dad always had a mustache, and I believe my mother told me it's because of it. So there we got this of that where you have the asshole on your top lit cupid spot? No, not cupids? Okay, here you go. I want you just on this map, holed this up and show it to the camera and then show me where Missouri is. And then I want to show you where we are. So that's a map of the United States. Don't touch it too much because it's you know, it's a Okay, so there's a map. Yep, there's a map. Buddy, man, where's the Missouri? Where's the place you've lived a year and a half? I swear to got in that fucking round, but I'm guessing this one. Wait, yep, that's it. Now, zoom in on that and tell me where St. Louis is. Is the only reason why I would know. Mm hmmm, it's because of its because I've driven this Chicago. Okay, Well that that that's helpful. I would say it's right here by the corner. Here by the corner there. Wait on the top or bottom bottom, No, not complete bottom, just in that little I would say it's southeast, but not fully southeast, so south, just below center, just below center. Well, you're very wrong, Okay, where is it? It is completely center. That little bulge that sticks out of Missouri, that's St. Louis, the little bulge on the side, not not the bottom bulge, not the little boat heel, the side bulge, but the thing is I don't know fucking anything about anywhere, so I wouldn't blame you. I do blame you for living there're half. I think at some point, I think in a year and a half, I would have looked up on a map where I am. But maybe not. I have to say that I did think Los Angeles on a map. If I would have just picked it on California map, I would have put it way higher than it is. It's so low. Okay. Also Connecticut, also Connecticut, New Jersey all that ship. Yeah, Oh that's a nightmare. That's a nightmare. I I don't know where New New Jersey is. I don't know where Connecticut is. I don't know where any of that is. York I used to below New York, New York City. I know that because it's this fucking stupid island that sticks out or like that's that sticks out, but it's kind of like centered into the Connecticut north or south of New York. It's north. Sure, Yeah, I think you're right, because I just know when I'm driving to like, um, you know, Rhode Island or something. For a wedding, I had to pass through Hartford, Like you see Hartford on ways places, and then you also see you go through New Jersey on other places. So I think that's driving does help you a lot. And the bigger to state, the easier it is to know, because like we have a general idea of where things are in the whole country. I could pick a state, but when the when they start getting really little, get too little, it's like finding the last piece of a puzzle. But then they get to square. Some of them are just squares, and you're like, come on, square, differentiate yourself from the other squares. Like Nevada gives me a little bit because it kind of like tilts to the sad Arizona Nevada are the same state. I think. No, Arizona is pretty square. No, it's like a travel it is fuck like one of ship. I think Texas. Though I can tell you where Dallas is, I can tell you where Houston is, I couldn't know any of that stuff none. I mean, it would be comical for me to place different towns in Texas. I've met a guy the other day from Iowa and he was trying to describe where he's from, and I was like, I don't even know the place you're using as a reference. Yeah, Well, you know Iowa City. It's about three and a half hours southeast Where you say that, I'm just like, oh boy, what did I ask? Oh god? Yeah, they go it's a small town in Iowa. Oh so if you take south and then it's about thirty miles east of the U. Uh have Inte's like a nice area. I wouldn't my wife go pick up a crib on Craigslist. They always sell it to you too. People always sell it to you, like if they live in a place that isn't I feel like they don't a lot of times, I don't even worry about it town. You know, I've been sold a lot lately. On the golf course. Yeah, the guy will be like, yeah, I from Glenn people with a lot of money who are very proud of that. They're probably from rich parts of town. I'm talking to mostly like p A s who are like, I'm just from this fucking shitty town outside of Wichita. I don't need to tell you about it. I'm not talking to the elite, the elite golfers of I mean, you're playing some golf courses that are funny. Those people are rich. It is funny that the guy who's like, there's some golfers. They're just people, you mean in general, where they'll tell you a story that they've told thousands of times, right, and they don't want a story from you. They don't. They're not good listeners. They're just they tell their story. They get their story out, and then that's the end of the conversation. And then you're like, well, do you want to know a little bit of the mountain? No, they they don't. He told me the stories, like, so we had, uh, this rich guy, this guy goes, this rich guy bought the the the uh what's the dock area, like like the waterfront area, and he was going to redevelop it but not but the people spoke and we got together and we filed a lawsuit through the one lawyer in town. And I'm like, what is this, Like how many times have you? And we wanted back and we wanted to he had all the point he was practicing his delivery all the way over. Yeah, And I was like and then that was the end of the story. And I was like, you don't even care if I'm listening to this story. Yeah, I need to get it out of your mouth. I don't know it's interesting. I watched, Yeah, I watched, um my man like was talking. I remember like I was walking in front of him talking to someone else behind me, and like this guy was just talking. Like my man had a story that was like partner in the same Yeah, my partner had a story that was like in the same ballpark as this guy's story. Probably a better story actually than the skuy's. So the guy gets on telling a story and he wants he does, and we we talked about it later. The guy did not give I heard. I heard Chris try to start the story like five times, and he would just keep talking over it. And it got to the point where it's just like, oh God, I cannot wait to talk about what I'm witnessing right now because it was just this guy. Just some people just don't give a funk about anyone with themselves. Get those people out of your life. That's why I'm just like when people when I hear people complain about someone being like when people just complain about other people constantly. This has happened with my mom, This has happened with certain friends of mine, where like all they do anytime someone's name comes up, a friend of theirs a family member. It's always just yeah, I just go I why do I have to suffer and hear all of this? Get stop hanging out with them? But their family, I don't care. They're they're abusive, They they they're mean. They will never ever compliment the sconce new sconces you made. Mom. That's that's the thing that bugs me about people complaining about people. People don't change unless they're actively going to like a twelve step program or going to therapy or going to do ayahuasca or meditating every day. People don't change. So you complaining about a person that fucking only talks about themselves always is passive aggressive to you. Always like those people. If you're waiting, you're at some point you enjoy it. You enjoy having an enemy in your life. You enjoy, Yes, you enjoy having something to bitch about. And this person gives you that because the person is not going to change. My mom and dad have both complained about certain people in their lives for years and years. And I just leave the room now because it's every time I go, why do you hang out with this person if every time you talk about them? Uh? And they go, well, because they're my friend, Nicky, what am I supposed to do? And I'm like, because I do enjoy sometimes I do enjoy hanging out with it. I go, do you because I've never once what is the benefit you're getting out of this person? And I've had to ask myself that sometimes about people, and then I go, wow, I'm just keeping them around so I have stories to tell about how fucking awful they are to my own. Because sometimes people are so fascinating ly awful that it is fun to hang out with them. I used to have a friend where I would wait for him to ask me anything about myself? Do you ever do that? Yeah? Every day? With you? God, I can be that way sometimes, but but I do find that I try to care about other people's lives, but when I have something, I understand that. Like recently with Chris, I've been like just really talking about my life constantly and not asking about his because he's so helpful and he has no problem just giving me, you know, just listening, and I get off the phone, I'm like, I didn't ask him anything about him, and it's like, we can't do we can't live like this. I can't do this. I do this thing where and I think you sometimes will do it to me, and I've done it many times, where you'll ask someone a question so they could do their thing just so you could get to your thing. So you pretend you go, oh, oh, that's interesting anyways here, I really try not to do that. I think that's what I mean. If I did you call me to ask me at all about my kid or my life, or did you just call to like tell me that you know you you put it well today And I'm like, oh shit, You're like, all right, how did you put today? He's like, what are you talking about it? That's sorry. It's such a pet peeve of mine at least. No Well, like when when you say something that happened to you and then someone else just has to make it about themselves, even if they talk about friends of theirs that you don't even know, instead of asking you to follow plation about your experience out of control? How like it's Noah, every bestie listening right now knows this person, you know, get them out of your life. Everyone we need they need to be called on it or get them out because they I this is what makes you know? What makes me more mad than people like that are people that still are friends with people like that and put up with someone that it just doesn't care about them. I remember one of the last straws with a friend of mine. We were like best friends, but a lot of our friendship was based on doing drugs together. And by when I say that sounds like we're doing hard drugs, it just it was just smoking pot and like going on my Space and stuff like that. There was and I think he had a crush on me, And then I think that he was a little annoyed because at one point I was like, listen, we are never going to be anything more than friends ever, ever, and I need you to know that and be okay with that if we're gonna be friends. And did you just have a feeling about the dude, yes, because any time I talked about other guys, he would kind of shut down anytime. And I love this guy so much and he was such a good friend of mine. It would be like me saying that to you, like if you were like we, I would want your friendship so bad because you mean more to me than that than that weirdness that I would be able to confront that with you. You know, Like there's some people you can confront things with. He wasn't a mean, caustic person, so he wasn't going to be mean to me about it. But um, he was really sweet and understanding. But then the more his drug use and drinking got worse. And by the way, this is always people who drink, generally, people who abuse drugs like they are the most selfish people on the planet, and not because they're bad people, but because they're in pain and they are being an alcoholic. You learn when you get into like twelve step stuff, any kind of addict is the most selfish person on the planet. So if you're surprised that someone who drinks quite often is selfish and everything is about them, don't be That is the way. That is the way they were born. Like that's a that's a point that that'd be like, um, you have a cold and you don't have the sniffles, that would be insane. If you're like, this is cold and they're like totally tucking, clearly you'd be like, well that doesn't go together. But that's how much being a narcissist is a part of being a drug addict or any kind of addict. But um, I remember one time this guy I was just like I remember, it was I was more, very much less mature and not at the point I made him in my life and I was dependent on him for drugs and my friendship. So I remember telling my mom like, he never asked anything about me or the family or anything watched and he was a friend of the family, and he came over one day and we were just testing to see how long it took before he asked anything about us, and it never happened, and it was it was an hour's hangout. What would he do, just talk about his own life, anything that would come up, it would just become about him, and there would be no comment on the thing that we would be like, oh, my dad would like show him this new fucking artific act that some guy from a movie set made, and it would just say it would maybe be like cool, and then it would be something about him, you know what I mean. And that was the day I was just like I'm done. I'm done. And I did you ever bring it up to him, No, because at that point it's such it's about alcoholism, it's not about his personality. And I think I knew that even then, Like people, if you have someone in your life. Who's abusing drugs or alcohol and you're trying to fix these little idiosyncrasies about the personality. Stop, don't waste your time. It's and it's not even the alcohol. It's about their self esteem and being able to handle the pain that they are going through based on childhood trauma. Just fucking uh, you know, whatever they're dealing with, it's that's the basis of it. Um, it's not about the alcohol. Even it's really complex, but they can't. The best thing you can do is go, I can't be friends with someone. I can't be friends with you. They have to lose stuff. Unfortunately, let's get to the news. You your first. There you go. It feels so it had don't sound ridiculous for a while when you started doing that smile. No no, I was telling them last night that my smile one time I was. We were telling who we look like like celebrities, and um, I one time got Wallace and Grommet from a guy I liked, which Wallason Graman is that cartoon where everyone's like this, And I used to smile like this, like with my teeth clothes, Yes, because why wouldn't you smile like this with your teeth clutes like this, Like that's how I sigl like, that's you smiling with our teeth clut. That's not you're trying to be Wallason Granmut, that's just But then I realized it makes you look so jow joy when you sign like this, Like even if I'm trying to do it like a little, it still looks jolly. Right now, let watch this now, I have a longer jaw. So what I do when I when I smile? Now Ever, since two thousand, probably when I started seeing myself on TV, I opened my mouth slightly and I go, hey, yeah, we smile. He gave us. That's right. I do it all the time. So you got to say, hey, hey, hey, hey, and it doesn't look like I have my mouth open. Hey yeah, and Andrew fresh faced Andrew, show off those teeth. See your gap is endearing. Dude, I appreciate that, But I do think you but I think I don't want veneers, but I just want my teeth to be even whiter, because I feel like my teeth color and my skin color are too similar. Where my teeth don't it all blends right? Like a dude, I mean, I don't I don't agree with that at all, but it definitely is not looking. I'm seeing your teeth and they look white to me, but I did so. Funny though, when someone goes, you know, my hips look fat, you're like, yeah, I just I mean, I don't. I don't. It's clearly not true because look at how white your teeth look on there. I'll take it. Yeah, but I think you should look into finneers. I would if I was ashamed of my gap teeth like you are. You have to smile now, I do because I don't know. I mean, I really want to get into I feel I feel good right now. I feel happy, but oh, you didn't feel happy before? Yeah, I think I was pretty depressed. Now that like, I'm kind of whatever, quiteen Zoeloft. I'm not saying Zoo made me depressed. I think I was numb and I wasn't really like realizing certain things about myself. And now I feel like i'm kind of I just feel good. You're accepting yourself, yeah, and I'm bettering myself. Yes, But you get on these tracks a lot. I do, but I want to stay on this track. I guess, of course, you could say my teeth look like a track, a train track that's been run over. Okay, let's get to the news. My teeth are terrible, they're great, Oh god, Okay. I wish we could pare up like you know, those like history things of like what happened to you at this age? And it's like, I wish we could do that for each other, where we can overlap of why we have so many similar thoughts about things and why like so many even though we're different in a lot of ways. But I think because we because the longer we hang out together, the longer the easier it is for us to come up with our own language of what's funny, because like us saying hamdrip nine weeks but like that stuff that didn't exist for both of us before with anyone else. And so now it's our like our like I did it with my cousin, my dead cousin. We had a talk called fun ty talk where we would just talk in this weird way and we would laugh at all the same things. Now that language of comedy has completely gone. That kind of comedy we created is gone, whereas this us going hamdrip like that doesn't exist anywhere else for you or I, And so that's why we could do it. My point though, is like if you go like this happened, you know, it would be interesting just to overlap it. I think it would be really be based on our community influences as kids, or like throughout our life, like what made us really giggle? And right now it's Seinfeld clips and a drunk mom in a drunk all right. So this actually segways perfect into the second article, which I'll change to the first. After writing a three hundred to five hundred word essay on the Nikki Glazier podcast, a bestie named Sarah gets into a media studies major at a university and she mentioned ham drip. Okay, so so here's an excerpt. I'm fascinated by the language the coast the co hosts have managed to create, how they transformed a collection of inside jokes into a form of communication among an in group. God she is the word in group, the phrase um, that is so great. Congratulations. She was a great writer. I love that whatever she wrote, well, we saw the whole thing, right. I didn't have time to. I was just I have a real problem. I can't read anything about myself or like anything nice like every Week Fan trax I buckle. Even though it's been chosen by Noah too. I know it's all gonna be nice because no one would never share anything that was like hurtful. I still like, I can't handle it. What I don't get anything hurt So I just want to say all the messages are and if there was anything es you, I would play it. I can't deal with um. But I think it's a compliment though, I feel like, and you know what I think it is. I was saying this the other night on my Instagram Live. I think I am scared of compliments because I think it gives thence. People are gonna see that and go, oh, she thinks she thinks she's pretty sweet. Well I'm gonna need to take her down, like I feel like when on my Instagram Live sometimes people be like that song was so good, good job killed it, and someone's gonna be watching that being like, no, she didn't, and here's my chance to let her know. Whereas if there were no compliments, the negative person would never talk because they don't need to take me down. Like I just feel like sometimes whenever someone's feeling too good about themselves, that's when you get the people being like, you fucking think you're so sweet, I need to take you down. And I'm just I would rather never be brought up to a avoid those I'm just. I think I realized that my whole life is avoiding people saying mean things about me, like even talking about early on, like my fear of presentations. It was fear of boys having to look at me and the teacher yelling at them during talking and then them saying, but she's ugly. It's always about that. It's real, it's I would think I would think how people are going to perceive me before I got to a party, But does that make you worry? Poor? Before I got there? Like like while driving there, I'd go, I'd play conversations, what's going to that? But do you have that? We're like hearing, let's that that that bestie that just got through school? And does any part of you go someone's going to see that and go they're back. I don't see this at all. That girl doesn't know what she's talking about. It's sucking dumb, and I'm gonna I'm gonna say I think it's like someone it's gonna it's gonna trigger someone to be the opposite is that why why I get that. I get that with like the success I've had, I guess, you know, just like from Afar, people can go, well, this is the reason why he's successful, or this is why I get those more compliment I guess you know what I was saying to my more, I think people are thinking that I don't deserve it. Yeah, last night I was talking to my friend Ailie. There's a part of my reality show coming out that the intro, they made me kind of do this thing where I'm like, I'm one of the best comedians out there, no one you know, I'm the most successful comedian out there. I'm one of the baddest bitches. And they made me say all the stuff noah, And at the time, I was just like, I don't want to say any of this is not how I talk. I don't even believe it. And they're like it we'll just like just we'll pepper it through. It's not gonna stay. And then of course the show starts with me being like I'm the best fucking comedian out there, which is I don't even believe that, and um, my parents watched it and last night they're like, I think you need to take out that first part because it really looks like you think you're pretty sweet. And I'm like, I get that, and I will take it out because I don't think I'm pretty sweet. But what is wrong with someone saying the truth? Because when men do it, we find it quite and we go they know who they are. I have to say, we need women to constantly ship on themselves. And if they and if they do feel like they're like too badass, like j Lo or Maria Carrey, they get labeled a bitch or diva. But any man, like do you think fucking Andrew Schultz saying like I'm one of the best comedians out there, do you think people would go? No, they would go they would be like, dude, fu yeah, no, I get it. Like over the time, said Bert Kreisher has a different kind of humility. He almost has like a feminine humility that is expected of him. Or Tom Sagura like these guys are sensitive guys, but alpha males saying they're the best, we go, fuck, yeah you are, And even if I don't think you are, I'm gonna believe you are because you just told me. But the second woman does it, it's like what a cunt. She thinks she's sweeten the line, and I just think, like, yeah, I get because I know you so well and I know that that's what I told Al said. If if he needs me to sell myself like that at the top of the show to get people to watch, well, they're not. They're not going to watch it because that's not what anything of the show is about. Like if that gets them in, well that they're going to drop off because very quickly I turned into someone who has like very low self esteem, So we're giving them a false reason to watch in the first place. If that's it, if you need to tell them all my impressive things that I've done, show clips of all the things I've done, and just have me talking over it like I never thought that I would do this, and you know, like let's think of a way to do it in a more humble way. But I think you start the show by literally going, um, you know, I mean, look, I have three specials on Netflix. I'm apparently one of them. You can just say the facts instead of saying that. But then there is something too about going someone that goes uh, you know, they make so many like asterisks of like being but while bragging and also being like, but I'm humble. But it's like, I know, we get mad at people if they're too humble because they're obviously they think they're hot ship and they're trying to play it down. So it's like, but I don't know. I mean, I think it's said. What it does is it sets it up where I'm telling you, well, I told Ali the woman that I'm just communicating about this, and I was like, hey, you know, I've recently seen some people talking about me, being like I think I'm famous and all this stuff, like there's this fucking subredit of someone who definitely listens to the show because they put it in a subredit they know I frequent and they were talking all this mean stuff about me that I constantly start sentences with, Um, I'm a lot more famous than I was before, Which have I ever said that? To brag it's famous is a thing, you know, like it's not or being rich is a thing. Like I'm not saying I'm a lot more famous. I don't think I'm very famous, but I have a lot more famous than I was five years ago. That's not me saying that's at the end of the sentence. You, guys, I'm so much more famous than I was five years ago. That's never you've never wanted taken it. I can't think of like one time in my life that because of your fame or your notoriety, you've used it in a way. Two think you're over the top. Like sure, like we all have. But like with you, you could call and be like, hey, I want that. You know, granted we got furniture, you know what I mean. But I did a deal where I know. I'm just saying, like, like you do, don't wear celebrity like someone in your position would. I think, I really do. I think you are to not do that because it is I've talked about before. It's hard when you start. I don't think, by the way, I don't fame is a fucking thing. It's a thing that you can you know, more people, more strange, more people. This is what fame is. Fame is not me bragging fame to me. When I say I'm more famous, it equals people who I don't know know me more people. When I say I've got more famous us, it means more people who I've never met know who I am and think they know about me. That's what famous to me. And that's why I comment on it because it is a weird feeling and I'm not playing a victim. It's it's what I asked for. It's what I always wanted. I always wanted to be famous because I used to put I used to think fame was like of cool thing. And obviously it is valuable because you can get free stuff, you can get more money, but all these things. But it is a weird thing to have people who don't know you think they know you, and that is not a that's not normal for a human to feel. And I don't like it. And it's maybe you know I talked about on the show before, Like I just I want to just stay at this level. I if I could just sign a contract that makes me like stay here, I would because I don't want any because it just means more hate. People just hate you more. And a Lee wrote that to me. She was like, the more famous you get, I've seen it with everyone I've worked with, the more people who know you, let me stop saying famous, because people think that that's a brag. The more people who know you who you don't know, more people that are going to hate you. It's just the way it goes. And I said, well, I don't feel like this happens to men truly. I just don't think it happens to men as much, and it doesn't happen to actresses. And I've said this before. It's just I just don't want it, I really And there's a part of me like thinking about the nuclear fucking missiles that are probably gonna be launched soon, and I was like, let's just bring them on. I just want to, Like, I was like, because and it made me realize none of this fucking matters. Well, that's that's true. I don't want them to bring them on. But I'm like, why am I worried about people hating me on the internet when we could be nuked in five days? He could be Yeah, grabbing an a K forty is having a fight for your fucking St. Louis. Yeah, it's so dumb to talk about any of this. I'm sorry, No, it's not. It's it's it's your real life. The only thing with fame that that anytime I think of fame is and I do this as well. It's like you watch something on YouTube, right, and you're like, who's this guy that she's talking. I don't know this person, so I'm not gonna listen to anything they have to say or whatever. There there's no wait to what they have to say because they're not they haven't had their own special or whatever it is. Then I go, oh, you're not even listening to me because you think I'm not famous or I'm not good enough without even like taking And that's where I give rubbed the wrong way where I was because you want more of that cloud of like where they just give you the benefit of the doubt beforehand because they know who you are. YEA. Other than that, I don't really it's not really about like I want everyone to know me and I want to have all this influential fucking ship. I don't give a funk about any of that. I just like that's stuff that's just ego though. I but I don't, I really do you know me? I don't walk around thinking that people know I've never I never think people recognize me or like, oh my god, I can't go there because it's gonna be people are gonna know me. First of all, they don't, but I've I don't think walking around there's not there's never a time where I There's maybe been one time in the past year where I've been like, oh, I maybe don't want to do this thing because oh it was at my own show at the casine where I'm like, I don't want to go to the bar because my faces on fucking posters and I just don't want people staring at me and being like what, I just don't want to be watched. But that was because my face was on posters all over the casino. I'm not someone who's like I need to be protected because I'm whatever. It's just I'm I don't want any of that. And it just really pained me to read someone say that I think I'm like famous. It's not like it like it was me saying I'm better. Like people just think that when you say you're famous, it means you think you're better. And that's not what I think at least, But you know what, that's them putting that on it. And I just have to let go of what other people think about me. But God, is it hard because when you when you get more people know you, they really have opinions about you that you cannot It's like trying to truck sense into someone who supports Trump. It's just it's deaf ears. There's no defending yourself. It's just because it all goes back to the original thing when you're like talking my like we want someone to can plain about and they want You're that person to a lot of people that like, oh I get to fucking my life, you know, like that, they don't want to get better. They don't want to fucking see the positive in you. They want to break down and find the negative in you because then it makes them feel better about themselves. And that's you're not going to ever stop me. I'm like, you listen to every podcast of mind. Why if you hate me? It's the same thing, Like why do you hang out with people that are that you don't like? That's what I'm saying that it's the same thing. But honestly, I'm so grateful for all the people who do like me, because man, the other night, I will say on Instagram Live, we gotta go to break. I'll tell you what this happens. I'm going to tell you after I get back from break, what me and the best he's got into Monday. So you know what that means. The other night I went on Instagram Live as I'm prone to do um and you were on with me. That was fun. Yeah you were naked and afraid. Um, that was so fun. I love I freaking love our Instagram and like the best people I know. I saw a lot of people wrote to you back and like thanks for standing up for Nikki. Yo. I wasn't doing it for yeah, she wrote to you. That's not why I was doing I was just like, fucking just this is like, like, no, I wasn't standing up for you. I know I was, but I hate those people are like I stood up for her yea to the same thing. I'm the best comedian, we have the same brain like that. Like, but I just wrote it because I was like I read something about like I want to suck on your labia or I'm like this first of all. But there's a different account for that. It's Nikki Glazy. Yeah. Yeah, if you're gonna everyone says that ship. So I was just like, I just don't want our little world to be and that's why we keep it private to be tainted. Now, don't get me wrong, I can tell well we were going to talk about that. Accepting. I accept a lot of me and no woul kind of do it, but I do it a lot, and I'll go through you know, they'll be like eight request to become our friend on Nikki lzer Pat And if I had to cipher through of who I think is going to say, I want to suck on your long labia, you could tell it would take me a while. It's a profile of like of like a dragon cartoon or with his kid on his back. Yeah yeah, yeah. It's either the most personal, but a guy with sunglasses and holding a baby, yeah, or a guy with like a gun and and just another gun. So well yeah you you. You put a story out the other day that was like yeah, I was just look, this isn't the place for that, like we keep it private to positive atmosphere and then people go, oh you can't hear the criticism. Uh, we just can we have a fun place? Can there be a place for fun? Um? It was so fun. So I played a bunch of songs and then afterwards we were all just like talking and I was like eating my oatmeal and like just hanging out and people started sharing like things that were going on in their lives that like really suck and like how and their anxieties and panic attacks and all the stuff, and then a couple of the besties in the chat like communicated about like I get those kind of panic attacks too, and we were just all offering each other advice and it was just turned in this like this one guy was like, my life sucks. I would no one would ever switch places with me. And then I was like, well, tell me about your life. It can't suck that bad. I was like, I'm sure there's someone in Ukraine who's like arming themselves right now who would kill to switch places with you. Watching me live on Instagram. He was like, I'm I'm bedridden and I can't breathe and I have like days to live. And I was like, oh, never mind, like it got to be but it was just like it was just people sharing their fucking feelings and feeling like um, and just a girl sharing about how her medication makes it so she can't poop, and we're sharing like, you know, uh, different supplements for you know. It was just like it just felt like I was hanging out with some friends. It was awesome, and that was it was just it was cool. I just like and just a guy like, hey, let's see your nipples. Fucking the other thing too, is like I don't people go, well, we're joking, you're so bad at joking. A joke is not I want to see the inside of your pussy and hanging on my wall like that's actually funny, that's actually not that bad. Sorry for being funny, but just see the inside of your pussy. How about that? Like a joke is not your inner thought with your coming your dick, and it's your grossest thing that you think of. Yeah, they just always go I would suck, I would look, I would stick my tongue six inches into your asshole and suck a fart out, And you're just like, that's not funny, Like that's you're just trying to say what's been said a million times. I don't mind funny. I don't mind dirty. Obviously. Men have children in their profiles too that write to me, Oh, it's interesting for you to say when you're the biggest creep, and I'm like, yeah, I am kind of a creep. I'll be honest, I wouldn't. I wouldn't label myself a creep, but I would say that I have creepy thoughts. And then don't I have dark like humor. I'm sure you've looked at pictures before and been like, I want to suck that fucking whatever when you were saying, but you know, we all have these thoughts when you show up at their house like a man, you write it in blood their window, like the fucking man. All right, let's get to our Monday segment, which we haven't had for a while. I feel like top one, bottom one. This week's category is cereal Cereal filne this before even if we haven't have but I don't care. How do it again? Okay, I know what. No, it's gonna because we did talk about seal. Oh my god, I love cereals so much. I mean, I'm this is my cereals, my favorite signfel make you get into serial thing. No, I never really liked what kind of cereal he was into. He was into, like frosted flakes. I think paid. Do you think they paid for that advertisement? Eventually? Um, what's what's your favorite cereal? Or let's start with the best. Yeah, I don't know it was started. You're right? Yes, yes, you're right, Andrew? Can I go? Can go next? Can if someone else go? Um? I'll go? Um, I'm gonna go with Captain Crunch and your bottom. Listen, I'm picking a bottom that isn't grape nuts or you know what I mean, like like this is for me. It's just this is the bottom of the top. Actually, grape nuts would be over Captain Crunch, because if I'm going to do us sugary cereal and like really commit to like a fun sugary cereal, I would much rather just say nope, I'd rather just not have sugar and do grape nuts. So actually would pick Captain Crunch is my bottom? What about with berries? I'm just wondering berries. I will like it a little bit more, but Captain Crunch. I I love a soggy cereal. Captain Crunch it takes longer to get soggy. It is cuts through from my mouth. It has a weird aftertaste. I don't like the dust it leaves behind in the cereal bowl. It doesn't And it's the kind of dust that makes you like choke, like you're in like you know, ground zero at nine eleven. It's like it's festot. I don't like it. I'm following a class action for when I fucking get Captain Crunch along someday. I just see you like trying to get some the last few out of the box, and yeah, you're like just covered, like, oh, we lost a lot of men in net. Yeah, and the captains like, um, ship, what's your bottom? Noah? My bottom? Uh is either fruit loops or fruity pebbles, because they have the same one here with your fruit coloring flavor, fretty pebbles. I will admit there's something that hurts the back of my throat with fruity pebbles. Even though I do like fruity pebbles, it does leave it hurts the back of my throat. Fruit loops I do not find that to be the same thing, and I like that. Um, there's a certain tea that Kurson brought to my attention that smells like fruit loops. I think it's an Earl Gray. It smells like fruit loops and it's fucking If you like fruit loops, check out Earl Gray tea. Um. But I think fruity pebbles definitely does leave a weird aftertaste and like a tinge in the back of your throat, even though I would not kick it out of bed. Well, now this changes my whole thought process because I thought we were gonna go like corn flakes for our bottom? You know what I mean, you can, but it's what you so I'm not gonna. I would never. I would never sack like I don't want to eat sugar. If I'm forced each sugar and a sugary cereal, I'm gonna go with something great. And then if I can't have that great, I would rather just do grape nuts, which is probably the worst add like blue berries or like some kind something else. You know, is what is that? Who wants that? Although it's healthy, you get your brand in or your fiber. Oh my god, I can't. I can't even decide my favorite cereal. I'm just thinking about it. It's really making my mouth water. Okay, what what's what is your number one? What's your bottom? Sorry? Bottom? You know what isn't that great that you would think would be great? Twitch tricks? I like tricks. Tricks are for kids. With the bunny rabbit, their tricks are good. I love tricks. Talk about a great advertising. Tricks are for kids. Yeah, just anything that makes you feel special. I just have to say, okay, okay, okay, gotcha? Whoa tricks? I'm on that shots fired? General tricks we're taking into a battle of Captain Crunch in general mills that no, we're gonna get We're gonna get email us again, me and Noah guy fucking messages from Zapps and uh, I want to thank yeah and cheeseballs. Yeah, I saw it on the box, So thank you to the lions. There's a bustie there that was listening to the podcast and he or she like they could not believe that we were talking. Okay, so thank you Andrew. H fuck top No, wait, what was your worst? My worst is corn flakes? Oh really yeah? Just regular corn flakes. Yeah, I like corn flakes. You put some Stevia on it and you let it. I get it. I get it. You're you're talking just playing. I don't Coutrema on these cereals is a part of it. But then you're making it's not to cereal anymore. I'll still take it. It's like I love I love that layered like layered and like you wait it you make it sit for probably like five minutes, and it gets that. I just love us. I'll like yeah, yeah, spicy. Um. Okay, let's go to best I'll kick us off. Okay, here's here's what I'm gonna do, and there are no rules, so I'm gonna give you. If I'm going with one cereal, I'm going with honey Bunches of oats almonds. It is so fucking good. I used to eat it every single day after school, like five bowls, and that is how I gained about twenty pounds between my junior and senior year. Honey Bunches of oats with almonds is the culprit. Now if I'm going with Now, if we're really going there, I'm gonna go Lucky Charms. Now, I'm gonna I'm gonna do a half bowl Lucky Charms, and I want half of it to be marshmallows, the other half the regular Okay, I don't want to do all marshmallows. I wanted half and half. Then I'm going to top it off with rice crispies Plane take down the sugar a little bit. I love a rice crispy. I love the way it gets soggy. I love the way it gives some consistency that's almost like gelatinous. And I know that discuss everyone listening and then more in the same bowling. I'll just do anything. I'm going to do some cocoa crispies to give it a little cocoa flavor, because we don't have that going on with any of the other flavors. I might throw a handful of kicks in it. Okay, now you're you're milk. Yeah, not to mix them all together. Oh my god, I just thought of pops, corn pops. You might be onto something here. Oh, I do a suicide of cereals. You know when you used to do suicide of cereals. King, I can't stop thinking of cereals. And you know what the what a really good cereal is frosted miniwheats. Also, uh, the miniwheats that had no because those are more of a savory wheats, the one side that has the powder on it. Why do they not both have powder? Ones that have raisen inside the mini wheat that is? Those are so they're like the raisin net of cereals. You guys, those are like really slept on. My dad used to get it all the time. Off final thought, best best cereal. Sorry, I couldn't stop it, couldn't stop have cereal in the goddamn house because I will eat all of it. I literally cannot cereal because I don't trust myself a box. When can I just say when cereal comes up real easy because it's liquid. I don't mean to please trigger warning, ham drip, trigger warning, but like I used to eat a lot of cereal. And then if you've ever been belieming, I hope that if you, if you have, please and you don't want to be anymore, please write me and I'll teach you something that will help you. But um, I to any of those people who were blieming out there that feel disgusting, I've been there, and like I used to always do cereal because it came up so easy. And I'm not telling bliem its anything. They don't know. Believe it's all know which stuff apples are a nightmare and they cut up your throat. Um, And I'm not giving tip, I promise you. I'm not giving tips. Tis. No, I'm not giving tips. But seriously, rice and from you come up really easy. I'm not giving I really am not giving tips. I promise you. It's also uh what's her name died of bolimia. Uh. I don't want to go to rehab. Yeah, don't don't believe the lies about it was drugs and it was whatever it was bliemia. It's a very dangerous disease that a lot of women have that they're doing other things that will they'll be like, but your bliemia is so fucking dangerous. Don't funk with that, you guys. And if you are fucking with it, don't be ashamed. Reach out to me and I will be happy to guide you in What has helped me to see her eating Counterracula? Oh yeah, because she's got that. It's got goth look very Countercula. All right, no uh on that tape once describing throwing up Countracula. So it's not Count Dracula. It's Frankenberry, which is one of the It's like a strawberry version of Count Chocola. But Frankenstein serves frank and Berry serves its final Halloween and I get so hat it like like a guy by got in between frank and Berry looks like between October twelve. Okay, so you're looking at like it's like Lucky Charms, but it also has the little other pieces are like pink or orange? What are they? They're they're pink. I got shortcake cereal. It's oh yes, So I separate the cookie part from the marshmallows, and I eat the all the cookie part and then I save all the marshmallows. I can't believe I just said that. Okay, here's that's what I don't. I love doing sugar cereals, but I'm doing franken Berry this year. Know what, you we gotta do a taste test, like at a live or something Halloween. I'm gonna send you Barry h it looks so good. Okay, Andrew, Okay, Andrew drum roll. I mean, I guess look, it's gonna be. This is boring. I know, come at me, cinnamon toast crunch. No, dude, we've been sleeping on that one the whole time. It's so fucking good. When I'm sucking stoned or when I was hungry in New York and I just there's every like once every like four months in New York, I just was like, I need cereal and I couldn't even stop myself. I'd like, sorry, that was my computer. Oh. I thought that was great. That was great, though I felt like, you know what, it sounded like it didn't come through on it was it was it was learning She's a Jar by wilco oh Ship. Anyway, it reminded me of like from Big Lebowskia me floating from Apartment two the count, you know, fucking Aisle four to get like that would have been great music. I'm just grabbing out. I grabbed chocolate, milk cash you milk, chocolate, Hello Withnamon. If you're not doing gone, if you're not doing nut milks with cereal like flavored nut milks like a vanilla almonds, you are missing the boat. I think that soy milk and nut milks changed the cereal game from that, just like skim watery. And I know some of you are just whole milk realists, in which case, what are you doing? No, no, no, don't do you. We went to a farm yesterday and we talked about that. Tomorrow, we've got a lot to catch up on Columbine and we're gonna talk about Columbine. We're gonna talk about heavy metal, Taylor Swift, We're gonna talk about um seeing goats and pigs. This would be funny to always teach something that we never get to. It's likest development or it's like um Jimmy Kimbel every episode he goes. I want to apologize to Matt Damon we didn't have time. He does that every single show, but Arrested Development would give for next week and it never happened. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, which they went through the time to make it. We should do teasers though, where they have to listen to the next episode to figure out something like pretty juicy you know what I mean, Like we actually will fulfill like a secret. Next week, I'm going to talk about how I bought a putter from Taylor Babe. Oh god, uh did you really buy a putter for Taylor Wood. It's a whole long story. I don't want to come at Taylor Made, but me and Taylor Made we have some issues. So I think my favorite guitars are Tailor's ironically and Taylor Swift. A lot of Taylor's in our Lives. Find out next you might be having me on a golf attorney. I would love for that to happen. We'll see what you see what happens. Um, guys, thank you so much listening too. Noahs are we didn't get to all of the news. Um. Congratulations to bestie Sarah who got into a media program by talking about are in group, which is the sounds almost like a like a racist term, but it makes me feel so good. Um yeah, anything else, No, don't be Ca and Jack gets coming Jack John F. Kennedy