Nicky past. Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. What's up everyone? Good Friday about to be Friday, Thursday. It's our Friday. UM fun shows coming up this weekend. If you want to come check a lady out, gonna be in Philly. It's sold out, so UM, I don't know Craigslist or something for that. And then uh uh Richmond, Virginia. I'm gonna be there on Saturday. And then next week I'm gonna be in um, good old Calgary if you if you know anyone in the Calgary area, I'm gonna be at some kind of casino there. Andrew will not be there, but I will be there doing meet and greets and everything. And UM, as always, if you know you can't afford a meet and greet, and this is truly for people who just can't afford it, Um, you can DM me. And if I see your d M and I get to it, UM, I will grant you a meet and greet if I'm doing them. However, if I just don't see them, don't be mad at me. Um, you just didn't bother me enough. Or I just like I'm getting to the point where I have too many followers and d ms get built backed up, but I try to sift through them looking for people, so um to get my attention. Um, just right, you know, and make it simple for me, like you don't need to be like, thank you so much? Is it okay if I do this, like like you don't have to tell me your whole story, Like I will trust that you qualify as someone who can't afford meet and greet, and you can write, um, you know, meet and greet and all caps, and that will get my attention. That's the first thing you write. And then just write your name and how many and which show you're going to. So sometimes there's two shows and that will suffice and make sure you just do it like two days before the show or something like that. So I have some spring dates that were just announced. Um, don't don't ask me for beating greets for those yet. I just can't deal with that yet. But I'll find a way to get them for my besties, um, because I want to meet you all and sometimes you can't afford it, and I understand on that. So UM, feeling so good today. I got my new UM Taylor Swift sweatshirt yesterday that I've been waiting for. I saw like Cody Simpson or someone was wearing it. It says all too well, collegiate. It's like a collegiate to print, you know, like it almost looks like Harvard or Yale. For those of you not watching on on YouTube, this will be up on YouTube. You can see it. It's on an etc. Shop is forty one. I got an extra large, which is like finally, like, I feel so comfy in it. The sleeves are comfy. It's like a blay Friend sweatshirt. It just feels like a fucking snuggy. I love it so much that I went and I bought um a couple others from this this shop. The shop is if you're interested, if you're swifty out there or you know any swifties. This is a great Christmas gift, a snuggly sweatshirt. I would get an extra large or large and it is um. This guy does not need my support. Shop Eddie Lane. He sells a ton of stuff. I wish he had better designs. To be honest with you, but I just bought a new swift the one I'm actually buying it right now. Wait no, no, that's not extra large. I'll get to it later one says Swifty one says delicate, which is my favorite song. But I don't want to walk around with a sweatshirt that's is delicated. People are going to think that I'm like, handle me with care, I'm scared. But it is my favorite Taylor Swift song. Um. Just had so much fun with Andrew this morning. This afternoon. We started late, late, late late, thank you noah, um, and we were uploading some video from yesterday and so I got a little extra time and I memorized singing your your little yes yeah we Um. Well I learned my favorite Dave Matthews song of all time. I think I talked about it before, but it's called say Goodbye. I played it on the live the other day. UM, very haphazardly becaus following the tabs, and but I memorized it, which is so much of guitar is just memorization, much like I guess comedy. It just you have to remember you can't. Some people are just like the go by, like, oh, I want to make an F minor here because that sounds like that's where it F minor would go. But me, it's like it could be anything at any time. I have to memorize what my hand does next, and I make little like how do you memorize guitar now? Is it just by ear? Or like do you do it the right way in terms of like oh, I know where things are and I know what the ways they should sound. I mean you're doing more like um, yeah, like I like to play chords and stuff, but um, I think it's just through a repetition and muscles memorization. So memorization you're not going off of like oh, I know my finger goes here because I know it's that's an e or like that's like I rememory. It's almost like with jokes, like I don't memorize by looking at the lines or whatever like that I've written because I never write them out. I just memorized by like the feel of it, or like like a image will top pop into my head of like it's interesting how people remember things. I just want to know. I don't remember that way, so I have to I can't remember like a song for the life of me, I depend on it. If you had the gun to my head and said and said play the song, I wouldn't be able to do it without reading it. But I think the the tab or the like you can follow up or do you read like actually sheet music? I didn't know that that's how I learned. Yeah, oh my god. Wait, how did you learn guitar from? I've I took. I took guitar lessons since I was well with my last guitar teacher from when I was nineteen until thirty five. WHOA, so you were you learned how to read music through that you didn't know how to read before nineteen. I just learned like in school and stuff, and I took a piano as a kid, very brief, right, Um. Yeah, I just feel like, you know, I think so much of my reticence to to play guitar ever, was that I can't read music. I don't have an interest in music theory. It just is almost like football to me, Like I don't understand it. It doesn't stick, you know. I still don't. When people go the B string, I go, will you just tell me what number it is? And then I have to remember to count from the bottom instead of the top. So when you're playing guitar, if you don't know, like they say, like the second string that's from the bottom, So it's to me that's the fifth string, because you should start one, two, three, four, five, six. But so I have to do not only when they say the b or you know whatever string. See, I only know the easer on the side, on the side, on the ends, and there's a high e and a low e and then but I usually like, just tell me the number string and tell me the number fret and I got you. And I feel like in time I will start to make connections of what where things happen. But um, it's just not fun for me to do it the other way. And I know that learning doesn't always have to be fun, but for me, guitar is so fun that I don't want to cloud it with things that feel like math to me because it's such a hobby that I enjoy. As Lauren said to Poppy, you do you Okay, Oh my god, I love that. Yeah, I'm gonna do me. And you know, the whole pick thing. I had a lot of people write me. Someone. The one person that really did help me well, Willie Nelson's granddaughter wrote Andrew and told me to get a certain kind of pick that has a um, what's her name? Raylan? Of course, Raylan is the name of Willie Nelson's granddaughter. I mean, that is such a cute name, and so like that would be what you would write in a biopic if you're making up his life. Raylan suggested this, like pick that has um, you know, like it's a little worn down in the middle, it has like a grip to it. It has a little like dots on it, like brail. Almost that makes you And those are the best for me, but still those are not fun. And and then someone said pretty much do you and said, don't use a PICKA is your fucking fingers And I was like, okay, that I can do. I can, oh, but it just doesn't sound as clean. But maybe I can make my my nail is like a pick, I mean, like your thumbnail resemble. Maybe I'll just get my nails shaped like picks. You know how you can choose the shape of your nail. They're like, do you want it square? Do you want it round? Coffin shape? Yeah, almond shape. I'm gonna call it guitar pick shape now. Um. But I just learned say Goodbye, which is my favorite Dave Matthews song, but it's from Live at Luther College. That's the version I like It's been my favorite song of all times since uh you know. I started loving Dave Matthews as a sophomore and call it or in high school and it is. It's just so the irony is. I never when I was a young girl that was obsessed with Dave Matthews, I didn't really listen to the lyrics. I wasn't like into the lyrics as much as I am with Taylor Swift or even now. Like I remember the first time I decided that I was going to be obsessed today Matthews where it just overcame my soul. I was laying on my carpet in my bedroom. I was a sophomore and I was listening to Satellite and there was just something so beautiful about the d d didn't, don't, don't, didn't didn't don't, don't, don't don't, And I was just like, I'm sold. This has taken me to a new dimension. This is gonna be my new thing. It wasn't even an option. It wasn't like I'm going to choose this. It was just like, this makes me feel something and I don't know what it is, but it makes me feel good. I didn't listen to lyrics because honestly, Dave Matthews man his lyrics. He is singing about love and a lot of songs, but then he got married and he started singing about the environment and he's like, don't drink the water, oh, the genocide of the people. And it's just like it's not like cry for you know, I'm like, he's singing about important issues as a South American man who has a lot of empathy, he's singing about real ship. But it's like it didn't strike my soul away. Taylor Swift did obviously, and um, but there's a song called say Good I and I was obsessed with it as soon as Life at Luther College came out. And it's just him and Tim Reynolds, very bare bones acoustic. Tim Reynolds is playing lead, uh and Dave's just you know, doing It's just I really implore anyone who's listening to go listen to that song and see if you are not as like fucking horny as I am at the end of it. So the thing is, though I never listened to his lyrics really because um, let's talk about you know the song that everyone knows, Crash, Hack up your Skirt, a little more. Show your world to me. In a boys dream, I watch you there through the window as a stare at you wear nothing, but you wear it's he's a creep. This guy is hiding in the bushes watching a girl. He's a boy watching a girl in dress, and it is sexy. Hike up your skirt a little more and show your world to me. Okay, yeah, well is your is? Is my world? A tampon string with some gross underwear that I got from two thousand, Like, I wear these gross on around my period that I used to get called um me and do you remember that they were like advertised on every podcast? Um, I think we The pairs that I have are from the show that we worked on. Yes, okay, so they gave us some. I loved them. I would get a new pair every month and it would just be like in their fun like designs and patterns. They're actually really great. But I got them probably for three years. So I have so many, so many of these meds and now they're just kind of older, and so I wear them for my um period days. But um the songs say goodbye. Andrew and I both love it so much and the irony is it's about two friends having sex one night and then they like part go their separate ways. So it's just like and I never knew that. I didn't even think about the lyrics of that song. I was a total noah back in the day, Like I didn't listen to I didn't like, you know, get into lyrics and dissect them. I just knew it was like about two Like it was just even if he was singing up, if you just started, uh, lyrics about whales, you would be like, this song is horny because it's just the tempo, the rhythm and then but it's so funny because Andre and I are both obsessed with this song and it sounds like we're like, oh, singing to each other, but it's like not, it's for me. This song was never even though I did, Oh my god, I used to have the biggest crush on um my, like this guy that was you know, I was only friends with him because I was in love with him. I mean the whole time I liked him. His name was Doug Reece. He was my first love, and I was obsessed with him as much as I was obsessed with Dave Matthews because he could play guitar, so freaking well, if anyone knows Doug Race or where he is or how to locate him, please someone get me in touch with Doug Reece. I would love to see that guy again. I know he's married and probably has kids and stuff. Not trying to fucking hit on him, don't worry about that. I just want to be friends with him again because he's such a good guitarist. And we called him ninety eight degreas because ninety degrees was a hot band back then. So now dy eight Doug g Reece, if you're out there, um, And the great thing about men is they don't get married and change their names, so they're easier to locate. But Doug was so good a guitar, and I was so in love with him. It was like my thing in high school. I know I've talked if you've heard me, if you probably told it on this podcast, but we have new listeners. I was, I thought I was. He was going to be my first kiss because we're best friends in sophomore year, we would like hang out all the time. I was harboring this like intense crush on him, and he loved Dave Matthews as much as I did. He would give me all these like mixed tapes that think these you know him Dave playing at a frat house in like ninety three. It's like, was all this we just exchanged Dave love. He took me to the John Mayer concert or actually it was Guster. We went to go see Guster. I don't know if anyone remembers them, but they're awesome. And John Mayer was opening for Guster. This was two thousand maybe, and during John Mayer, so Doug had seen Gust the first night they played. They played two nights. We went to the second night and Doug was like, you're gonna love this guy, John Mayor. He's so freaking good. I'm so into him. And we're watching John Mayer and then he starts singing your Body is the Wanderland and like that song which I've never heard before, you know, And Doug leans into my ear and goes, this song is about sex. This is so hard. But I didn't love him yet. Then then I became obsessed with them, slowly but surely, and everyone in the school knew it was like my thing. He didn't know, though, until after I confessed my love. And then everyone knew, but um, one day, I was going to confess my love because it was just bubbling up, which is what I've done with every single guy that i've you know, Harvard feelings for. I eventually just go, I like, you, like, why do you think I'm hanging out with you all the time? Will you just like kiss me? What the fuck? Like? I usually, well, it's not like that, but I usually confront it because I just like, am like gonna fucking volcano. I just I'm like, why isn't this person making move? Um? And so I always have to. But I was going over I've told this before. Kirsten was over at my house and I was going over to Dougs in an hour after school, kurs came over to prepare me to go to Dug's house because I was gonna tell him I liked him. I was going to take the bold move and tell him I liked him. We were studying chemistry and Kurson came over and I was like Chris and kiss boys by then, and I was like Chris, and I'm so nervous, like what if I'm a bad kisser? And she was just like, You'll be fine. I'm like, but I don't even know what to do. I had studied can't hardly wait the ending scenes so much where Jennifer left Hewitt kisses and then lifts her eyebrows, and I knew I had to do that. You have to lift your eyebrows after you kiss the first time. You have to kiss, and then you go and then you kiss again and then you kiss, lift drybrows more. Um, But Kirsten just goes, just kiss me right now. I'll tell you if you're good. And so we made out and she was like, yeah, great. And I didn't realize until I was doing a podcast in my twenties that that was my first kiss. I was telling that story and my friend was like, um, Nikki, that's that was a kiss. That was your first kiss. And I was like, oh, fuck, you're right. So I went over to Dougs and we were sitting we're also obsessed with counting crows, and we were sitting in his dark basement with our chemistry books on our laps across the room, and I was just like, Doug, this is like kind of my personality. I like to just jump. It always felt like jumping in the pool. If you've ever been a swimmer and you have swim practice in the morning and the cool pools fucking freezing, and you know you have to get in there and swim for a fucking hour, and you're just gonna like I don't just like tiptoe in and like go to the side of the stairs. I just jump in and you have to like do it. When you know you don't want to do it, you just have to start moving and then you're it's too late to turn back, so I just go dog. And it was Anna Begins was playing if you know, counting Crows, and there's like this this line is like Anna begins to change her mind and then it's like the seconds when I'm shaking with me shivering for days, and it's just like this like very like emotional song, and um, I go, Doug, I have something to tell you. And I just remember him looking up and being like he had this really low voice. He's like yeah, and I was like I like you, and he was just like um. And I was like I like you and I'm sorry, I just I don't know. I just need you to know. And he was like, oh nicky, and I was like, oh god, I thought he was going to make out with me right then, because like I knew he liked me, and instead he was like I have a girlfriend, and I go what we were best friends and go, you have a girlfriend. What are you talking about? He's like, I just started dating this girl from a private school, and like, we don't need talk. We're in publish school. We don't We're not even talk to them. What are you talking about? Her name was Katherine. I hate it the name Katherine until I met my best friend in in college named Catherine, and I was like, I take back, Katherine's are cool now, but I and then this girl I hated her from afar. I remember I had her on my a I M so I would see when he logged on he was Marley fan pH a N and then he would go like like the door would open and then I'd see her gan on and then I would see them like and I would write him while he's writing her, and I was so jealous and like try to play cool. And then finally he broke up with her, finally for me because he liked me. And then the second he broke up with her, I stopped liking him. Like this, like literally on a dime. I was so excited when my friend Matt Vanderboard told me he took me outside at Barnes and Noble. We're all we we would all meet and hang out before, like at night and like study. But we were just hanging out and flirt and and he took me out in the parking lint. He was like niggy Doug broke up with Catherine, and I was like, oh my god. I was jumping up and down. I like jumped on top of them. I was like so excited, like my dream, like I was up. Everyone knew I was obsessed with Doug Race. Everyone it was like my identity. It was Dave, Matthews and Doug Race. And he broke up with her. And as we're walking back into the cafe at Barnes and Noble, I remember following Matt and he's like, he's coming up here now, and I was like, and he said that, and I just go, I don't like him anymore. It's I don't. It's like I don't, I don't. I don't like him, and it freaked me out. I felt so bad because I wouldn't. I didn't expect that. That's why I relate. That is why I relate to men who after they have sex, they just stopped liking you and they don't know why they can't control it. I did not want to Dug to break up with his girlfriend so I could go, I don't like you anymore. I just was repulsed by him overnight, and repulsed only because I had to now be intimate with someone. It wasn't anything to do with him being repulsive. I was like, and oh, man, was he bummed out because I couldn't tell him I didn't like him. I just changed and never would be alone with him and never so and we never talked about it. It was all like our friends talking to us about it. So he quickly got the hint that I was not into it, and boy was that probably disappointing to him. Um, and it's a it's a curse that has stayed with me for a while of like thinking that you know, is being scared that if I like a guy and he likes me, I'm going to change, and it has happened in the future. But um, now that I actually like myself if someone likes me, I'm like, oh good, you're you finally got a good job. As before, I'm like, I don't want to I'm not joking you. That quote about I don't want to belong in the same club that would have me that it was, you know, Gratcho Marks, but Woody Allen said it in um Annie Hall, I'm not joking you. I thought of that exact joke in eighth grade before. I've never seen any Hall. I'd never heard that quote before. And I was decorating a bulletin board with my friends and I said to my friend, do you ever feel like a guy if they like you, you don't like them because they have bad taste and you like, wouldn't like a guy that would like someone like you? And they were like, what the funk is wrong with you? And I remember thinking that was ironic and funny, and then what Allen stole it from me? I mean Gratcho Marks retroactively. All right, let's get Andrew in here. It's a fans Rax episode. I'm decided to get to it. Andrew, What up, Drew Sky? Yeah? Oh new pants are nice, comfortable dude. I just saw a thing about a guy posted on Reddit that he got in trouble because his his manager called him into the office. He was wearing pants quite like that, and he took a picture of them to post to say, do you always see a problem with this? He got in trouble for his bulge and they said you need to wear looser pants because your bolt and he goes. I've he goes. And by the way, I have an advertised penis. I just googled the size and like it's because he's not from this country and the pants were not tight at all. It was insane, but he's Um. Everyone in the subreddit, you know, commenting was like you have a lawsuit on your hands. Like, no woman if if a woman got told to put her boobs away because there was too much like you know, like they're not showing them, but they're like like your shirts are too tight, yeah, or your camel toe, it would be an issue. Well, luckily my dick's inside my body, so um, I'll keep that. Yeah. No, have you ever been distracted by bulge? Oh? I think I said it on the show. I used to ride the subway and look at men's bulges, like in the morning to see who had morning would Oh, yes, that's right, you did a game. I never did that. But have you ever worked with someone that um you saw there or like a friend where you're like, come on, man, oh I mean yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Was it hard to get work done? I mean it was like kind of gross, I guess, but also distracting, So I guess yeah I was. Did you get the U? Was it a hard time doing your job? The blow draw? Well, okay, I think it depends if I was, if that's what I was there for, or uh yeah, I was just there to do something so funny about a guy buying pants and he's like, I just I got a huge cock? And do you have extra roots? Actually? Those Lulu lemons a B C S. I think it's stands for like I mean, I've always thought, oh yes, yeah, it's like all balls are are allowed in here? Yeah, are customary for I don't know, yeah, weled it? Yeah we both have. Do we have COVID? I don't know. I got a COVID test this morning. I told you about it. It was an abandoned parking lot. A girl came out a bandit ish like it's in the our corner. Were not exaggerate, Okay, I'm not gonna exaggerate at off, And I'm only asking that so I can just know. I just I just want the real story. Okay, so I Google I think I have COVID potentially because I'm only getting sicker now that I think I have COVID potentially because I'm only getting sicker. I did, but I misspelled potentially and then led me to this abandoned parking lot which wasn't abandoned. So the parking lot was there was three cars in it. It's like a tent, like a makeshift tent. It's a little bit bigger than the like almost where you would sign up for, like a race if they were handing out like you know, if volunteers were being like, come over here to sign up for the corner of the like a blue tent with like sides. There are a little bit of sides when I'm telling you these things on the verge of falling, like sitting. There's a table. I didn't go into the table. You just parked next to it. Do you see inside the tent? Isn't it very okay? Got it? And there's there's no real doors. You have a sign that says COVID tests. Yes, there is a sign that says free PCR COVID test. Is it written on a cardboard box with sharpie and it says for ten dollars in a blow job, you can find out you're negative. So you could go into that Pearl Jam concert. I think that's what the signet said. So I paid ten dollars and I didn't come because it's all no, no, no. So it's free, which is another thing that's like rapid PCR rapid free tests, seventy five for one dude. This seems so illegitimate. I can't even it's fine because you want to it, I think, I mean, I don't. I'll go, but I know what I'm gonna get. It's going to be negative because this is sounds. But they're not asking for money. Hundreds of like yeah, yeah, they're not asking for money. That's the thing. I've had hundreds of COVID tests. Not once has anyone handed me a swab and said do it yourself. Get there. So then I drive up. She's in her car, she's not even in the tent. She gets out of the car. It's got a mask on jeans and a middrift showing like yeah, and she walks up. She goes parked over there. She's wearing a mask, not well street mask, street mask and not well, so she walks up and she goes, uh, you here for a test, and I was like yeah. She goes all right, sounds like prostitute solicit, like it felt very prostitute. Yeah, yeah, like yeah, she's leaning into the car. Yeah, she goes park around the corner. Yea, yeah, yeah yeah, stick this in your sing I think if we fugged, I'd be positive. No, so I end up. She goes she gives me the thing and AIDS test where it's just you know people with AIDS that fuck you, and then they go you're positive. Yeah the test we know. We just know now, Like that doctor with the HPV from the other day, he used his magic flute. Yes, so she was yeah, he was hearing HPV. Then he had it because he was giving he was fucking girls with it. You know. His claim is that he had the at the vaccine, so he was sucking the vaccine. So she walks up. I'm a little weirded out. She gives me though. She gives me a thing to scan, so I scan it. That seemed real where I put my information in it and put my email in that's where that's what they're getting for free. They did for my mom's social Security number. Do you have to do any like? Nothing weird nothing so security number, nothing like that, nothing like that. So I fill it out. She goes, she comes back, she gives me the swab. I I put my nose out for her to swab me up. She goes, no, you just do it. I swabbed. She goes five, four or three to one, give it back, and then she goes, all right, and then I go to do and she goes, no, no, no, and then she gives me another star. Never had known, oh to swab to swabs, I guess one for each test. So then she puts the one in the thing. And then I see her walking with the other swab for the rapid test. I'm sure just holding it without putting it into plastics so she doesn't have to do that. I'm contaminated on the way there, like, yeah, you gotta put it in a tube. She's like, you have bird flew that flew onto this fucking Oh my god, this is so has I wonder. So she came back. How minutes let's really, I'm not kidding. It was short. It was shorter two wells okay, so four and a half minutes. Here's the thing we've we get these a lot, these rapid tests because the camera. She came back faster than that, and she said, your rapids negative. You're gonna get the other test in hours. Take off your pop ups in your settings. And I don't know why she had me do that, so then she I don't know, so I wouldn't get spam or something. So I ended up. Look, now I think your phone has the virus. Now take pop ups off your phone. I mean, we gotta gotta figure out what this operation is because but I looked at I looked at the reviews, solid reviews. But everyone's happy. I guess everyone's happy because of how efficient it is. It's so efficient because they don't do it. It sounds suspectius. Here, I'll show you the I'll do the cod so your head just I'm trying to whenever you get sick or you get some sort of ailment, I'm always interested in, like how it manifests. Like I I obviously have been sick before, but like when you're like I don't feel well, I'm like, do you feel is it a headache? You're like no, Like is it a stomach ache? No, your head is stuffy if I know your head is stuffy, is very annoying to have, but it doesn't it doesn't hurt. Yes, so where does it hurt? Just forehead like it's a headache, hurd or is it just a know, like a pressure just because this is what you describe your panic attacks to, like your head's gonna explode. No, this is sick. I was sick. No, but I know. But is it the same kind of pressure? Oh no, it's different panic attack pressure. I can't even describe. It feels like it's all over your head. When you ask me how I can wiggle my ears and I go, I don't know how panic Yeah, well you're doing it, but I don't know how. I feel like i'm moving them to and they don't. No, what can you wiggle your ears? There's no wiggle going on? You have no or you don't know there's no wiggle. You just feel like a strain in your ear. And that means I just don't you know. Some people can just do it. But yeah, okay, So I'm just trying to understand feelings because I feel no. I think like sometimes they're like when I tell you I'm sick, you like almost want to like this belief. It no the way reason, not at all the reason I asked questions. I really promise you. I know that if you're sick, you're sick like you do not get sick out. I just want to understand what it is because sometimes I'm like, do I feel sick? And maybe I do get sick and I just don't know it because I'm just so not in touch with my feelings or something. I don't know. I'm not trying to be like I work when I'm not saying that's not the VI I'm trying to put out there. I'm just trying to say, like I don't know what it feels like. I don't know what a cold feel like. I know what it's like to be like sniffle y, but it doesn't. It's just annoying that I can't breathe out of my nose. It's not like I feel does it feel like you can't think? I felt I felt like I couldn't think. Vision gets a little bit, uh funked up a little bit. Yeah, you were out of it last night. I mean like we were what we were watching Seinfeld. Brenna came over after work and we're all like we were just hanging out and um, you put on Seinfeld and it was a great episode of Uh when Elaine record, it's a sexy voice like Jerry's recording. Is here your sexiest voice? Um, if I was trying to do like h like, if I was trying to do hey, like, I would probably do more baby because men like babies now as opposed to like her voice was like a huy. I think you got to go more seductive, like lower, like like like like will you invest in my blood transfusion? It's yeah. If I come out in some scrubs that aren't nurse scrubs but they were at one point, but I bought them from Goodwill, Yes, Um, yeah, I don't. I don't. I guess my sexiest voice is like I get like this like when I'm like trying to be like when I'm like being like do you want like do you want? Like I don't know. I guess I just kind of do it like this. Like but I feel like whenever I'm being like sexiest, it's like I'm like it's kind of like I'm a baby because I like to be dominated, so I'm a little bit more like I don't know, so it would be a hot guy's voice if I was like, uh, take your shirt off, like it be kind of disciplinary, like you think that you deserve to come right now? Um, that's so cute. Oh I love that you think you do. Like it's it's caring but like a little dismissive but like um ah, you're so like it's not it's not um the oh isn't sarcastic, but it's like it's nurturing, like you poor thing, Like, oh you want to come? All that's so cute? Well do you think you deserve to? Like it's like that interesting. It's so weird. I'm very weird. I feel very awkward when I start like giving demands in the bedroom. You know, like yeah, you like that, you like that, you a little slat, you like that, Like it just feels very funny. It feels funny, silly, and it just feels like you ever feel like has there ever been a moment where you did get into it and you were like, oh, I've got because were sometimes you were like oh, I like you know, choked her a little bit and you're like, oh it felt really good too. I like getting dominant. See you like to be dominant. I like choking a little too, just because she you know, she responds to yeah, yeah, but it's not like my go to move, you know, I'm not like my first instinct isn't to be like I'm kicking over. Yes, you know. What's your vibe in bed? Do you like to be very Britney Spears? But I know you have like, Oops, I did it again, but I'm so much what's the one toxic? No, toxic isn't an air that's oops, I did it again. Where she's wearing the it's no, I's wearing like a lime green like neon green kind of turtle tight turtleneck. But it looks exactly like the Britney Spears read one that she wore. Yes, that's what it is. Yes, um no, what is your style in bed? Do you like? I like snakes in bed, holding them up and dancing around with them like oh, I was like, what is she going with on this? Get them? I don't know. I mean, they're they're probably are snakes just in your bed. You gotta be into them if you live in the in Arizona in the arid zone. Um what yeah, I think like, Um, I definitely like to be dominated. I like to be the bottom, and whenever I tried being the top or like the dominant one, I just felt like I was faking it. So yes, And I think it just depends on the partner too, because I did have one good experience with it, with being the dominant one. Yeah, I would like I you know, the more I'm thinking about like bringing another girl into the mix with the the guy I'm seeing in me, or like ever being with a girl, I think then I would want to be the dominant one. Like I when I think about like my crush on like Taylor Swift, I want to like comfort her and I want to be like the man in that relationship, and I want to be like, are you okay after your show? Like I in a relationship with a woman, I think I would want to be the asculate, like I would want to dress like this, and but in a in a relationship with the man, I like to be the girl. And so I think that I like, I like both and I'm not you know, I think that maybe that's where I've kind of uh been reluctant to ever be in a relationship with a woman or even pursue something because I I am always thinking, oh, I need a woman that's kind of like a man to because when women hit on me that are like more is butch, like a dirocatory term with a more masculine energy woman, I generally like, I'm like always flattered, but I get uncomfortable because but you said you want to be a man, and I think that's why it's I've always associated like, oh, I'm probably couldn't be an a lisbian relationship because if I wanted to, it would happen because I get come, Like you know, lesbians come on to me a lot. But I think that I that's the wrong role for me in that scenario. And I'm literally just realizing that. But I whenever I fantasize about or like I see like my self hooking up with a girl, it's like me being like the one that's like, oh, you think you're gonna like me being that? Yes, what do you mean is that only if there's a or if you were with a woman alone? Do you think alone? But with a guy, I would want to like be like a team. I love. That's my favorite porn is when a woman and a man are working together to make a girl come and they're like, oh, like that's my favorite porn is two people doing stuff to a woman so that they can talk amongst each other about her being like she's oh look at her, she's struggling. Oh you want to come? You do think you deserve to? And then they both like get in on it. It's very um. There's just stick almost Sorry, there's one porn that I shut up. Noah, I'm just I'm just gonna get that Jesus Christ. Sorry, look at her, she can't even talk that good? Uh no, what were gonna say this this one? I was going to say, there's a porn that I've been thinking about a lot. I wouldn't even know who's in it. But it was too um. It was a married couple and they were sucking the babysitter and it was exactly the scenario that you just painted. And I loved it. Will you send it to me? I can't find again someone to help, damn um. Like the the the guy has like a goatee, he's very ugly looking as usual. Yes, the wife has like curly brown hair, and the babysitters like this tiny little blonde girl. Yes, and they're just like sucking her like crazy. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah and how's the kid doing crying? I'm not watching that kind of porn. Oh my god, that's so funny. The kids where where are the kid drowning in the pool? In the pool of com um? God? Yeah, that's the that's that. The problem is I I just require so much of Like I don't like watching high school football versions of porn. I need to watch people at the elite level doing the craziest stuff, like just if there's not if she's not doing anal, I don't want it's it's it's literally worthless to me if there's no, And it's not because I'm like, I love anals so much. I just need to see someone who's who's more impressive than I am, Like I have to. I don't want to watch people who are as good at things as I am. I want to see like the next level. There's something about amateur that it's pretty hot. I don't know, the shitty like camera angles. Yeah, if they're doing Wait, do you like our friend Ramy has that bit about that he's he doesn't think he's gay, but there's dicks that he likes in porn. Are there vaginas that you like and don't like in porn that turn you on more. No, they're all the same to me. Really, that's um. Yeah, I definitely there's certain like I like what I like, what I look like. Honestly, that tends to be like my favorite. But that's just my preth Let's get to the news first. Oh, it's Thursday, folks. You know what that means. It is Thursday. I hope you're having all the swells, even you, Mike. Yeah, you know there's a mic listening. I know. That'd be so cool if I heard that when I was listening Dave yesterday. Yeah, I didn't you get certain you'd only do it a men. No, I know, because I'm sexist, I'm misogynists. Australia's most famous identical twins, who eat, sleep and showers with their shared fiance, have now revealed their plan to pregnant at the same time they share a fiance. Oh I know too, that share another and they want to get pregnant on the same day. Okay, this is a lucky guy. I mean, it's wild. I bet they will get pregnant on the same day. I mean, but their cycles are insanely syncd up. Can you see him in on the Noah I want to see these girls. Can you show me a picture of them? Manager they're not They're not bad like him. Yeah, it looks like the cast of the Jersey Shore. Yes, okay, these are the girls I wouldn't watch in porn. You know what I'm saying, Like these giant fake tits. I mean, I've got I've gotta guess those are fake. Um, that guy isn't that cute? Does he have money? What does he do? I bet they'll get you know, twins have a weird thing that I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little bit jealous of this person that you share everything with like you are. It's just really cool. I think, you know, it's it's creepy to a lot of people. But I don't think that this is that weird that they would both they both want to be with the same person, and that they look the same. I wouldn't take it as like he's more into her, like, you know, the physical thing is like I don't know. I I want to say this is so weird, but I actually kind of I don't think it is. Do you know the Bella twins, Yes, so they had uh like like both of them were pregnant around the same time. Yes, those girls have a podcast, my friend Rose but it was on it recently. And then I got into like looking at all of their like clips and stuff, and they're so beautiful and so cute. And I actually have Nikki Bella's Dancing with Stars Rode because she left it behind the season before mine and it said Nikki on it, so I stole it. Um she uh. And then she she married her dance part Artum. Yeah, she married her dance partner, who you know, they were like both in relationships when they were dancing together, but they fell in love, just like Robert Hehrshevik and his dance partner. There's people that are like still together from that show. I mean, it's a lot of sexual energy. But the twins, I've always was jealous of twins. I wonder when who met the guy first. I wonder how that worked out. I bet you anything they put. They don't do anything apart. I mean these girls, you see some twins, they don't do anything apart. I think I'd want to live across the country from You don't know that, like you if you were a twin right now, yeah, that would make sense. But like when they're you're it's a different thing that you don't understand. We can't possibly understand. I remember the book Stumbling Bond Happiness that everyone was reading back in like two thousand nine when it came out. They were talking about how these can join twins. Everyone just assumes like they're miserable, you know. They they are two girls that have like their heads shooting out of the same neck, and they're just always next to each other and like they you know, obviously don't do anything apart, and they can have separate lives because they're one. They share the same fucking heart. They don't want if they got separated, one of them might die. They don't want to do it, and everyone just like goes, God, that would be awful. I can't believe that. But they're generally they're like happier than most people because they don't know any different. That's all they know. And so it's something about so much of your happiness is based upon what you have once experience and then lose, or what you think you might want. But these girls don't have no concept of what it would be like to be an individual person. And if we, just as a human race, all had two heads, sticking out of our necks. We would also feel weird if we saw one person to be like, oh, that would suck to be alone. Like it's all that really blew my mind though, and blew my minds. I mean, well, yeah, both of them. Um. It is interesting though that they didn't find another set of identical twins, like they just they've had a lot, but they just oh, of those two girls. Know that there's Um, if you go to my Instagram and go to the thing called watch TV with me, there was a one night I was watching something on you know, TLC, and it was two twins that met two twins, and that would make more sense than just sharing one guy. But I guess if you do everything together, and like I don't know, I don't I would not care at all if there was someone else that looked exactly like me and I loved hanging out with, I would not want to get married because I'd miss hanging out with my best friend. And if we both it wouldn't take from me because you you know what I think it is. There's this really trippy thing that I realized one time where I was like so jealous of girls in my high school. This is another eighth grade Nikki moment that kind of made me realize, like I had a um epiphany of self back in eighth grade that I just barely grasped onto. But sometimes I don't even know how to describe it. But like I used to get so jealous of popular girls and like what they had and what their lives and how happy they were and how boys like them and stuff, and I was like, really, they're me. If you can think of what I'm saying, it's like I am. There's I don't even know how to describe it, but there was something that gave me souls if you even understand what I'm trying to say out there, anyone that's talking about this, we're all one, like they're no different. The only reason that they are them is beca as I'm attributing a self to them that is separate, but we're all like I could be them too. I don't even I can't even describe it. Now. There was something about like I that's why I don't get jealous so much of people. It really sometimes something cuts through it of where it's like I could they're they're gonna die. Maybe there's something of like they're gonna die to someday we're all one, like, but we're all there's no there's no me. I am just a computer of cells that are like operating. I don't have control over it. It's not up to me what my heart does, what my breathing, Like I can't control my breathing. I can't want I can't control my breathing. But you know, you don't control what your brain is. Like there was something almost about like the no free will of it, all of I didn't choose to be in this body. The girl that I'm thinking has a perfect like Brittany Burke that was, you know, the girl that I always wanted to be. She didn't choose to be in Brittany Burke's body and have her life like I could be her for all anyone knows I am her? Do that makes sense? People look at me? That's it? If I look at you and Noah and you're two separate people to me, how do I know? Like your soul is you and like like it doesn't You're I don't even know what I'm like sounding like I'm on psychedelics right now. But there was just some epiphany I had where I was like we're all on one thing. We're all one organism, just gigantic. I don't even know. That doesn't capture it for me, but I don't know. We're all capable of what the other person is doing, all just not selves were not I'm not me. I'm just a thing that's living. So you know what it is. It's not so if I'm jealous of you, Noah, it's not that I'm not I'm not you. You're not you either. You're just a thing like you're not you, like we there's not You're not inside your brain like a little alien, like controlling the can trolls and being like I love being in here. I'm like a little guy that's like in this awesome spaceship. You're just a thing that exists, that's like moving. It's like, yes, you have feelings and all of these things, but it's not like you got that. You're just it just exists. It's like being jealous of a fucking chair or something like. It's like that. I don't I don't know how to describe it. If anyone has any idea what the funk I'm talking about, please some literature on it, because I'm sure there's some philosopher or some fucking meditation that is talking about this, but like, we are not. Sam Harris always says, you're not inside your head watching a movie as this person. You're not like, you're not you, You're just a body and consciousness is this idea that you think you're a you, but you're not. We're not if you. That's when people have like an ego death, because an ego is a sense of I, I am me, like I have a I have a something too, Like I want able to think I'm good because I'm I'm responsible for this thing. But you're really not, Like you're just a fucking chair. I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm bored by myself to be honest with you. I'm really sorry. I think if you there's a quote on the wall of Jimmy John's that will what are free smells? Are they free? Are they yours? I don't know. Um. Here's the thing about a twin, though, be tough. If one was way more successful than the other one. I I have friends that are twins. They're kind of identical. One's a huge country star. One sells insurance back home. By the way, did you ask that twin country star, but I needed you to ask him. I ask him. Yeah, I've been doing some I've been doing some digging on my girl, and I don't I just want to know I have an insider track that I can get insider info about my girl that I'm not I shouldn't be getting because it's not my business. But I do know someone that did cross paths with someone early on who may have inspired one of my favorite songs. And I need to know if it's him, and if they did have a moment and if they did, what what happened? Business? And I'm sorry girl. Maybe it was his insurance selling brother. Maybe it was his brother but a better insurance selling brother. Didn't want to be a country star, or did he? Did he try? He was very good at sports, as well as his brother, But did we get them on stage? Sometimes he can't sing, okay, So did he did he want that? I think he wouldn't mind being a celebrity. I don't know what for my sister is. I always thought identical twin, I understand that. Yeah, imagine if you're identical twin was either more famous than you or way. Richard bothered me as much because I'd go, I could do the same thing as them. I just didn't want it because I'm the same body Like it would convince me more of like I could have that if I wanted it. Well, I'm guessing that to this point with these twins, they seem to be like everything's the same, So then there will be no jealousy, there will be no envy. We shared the same guy, We share the same which is an interesting way to approach it. But my sister would get things that I didn't get, boys liking her, people complimenting her looking like just having clear skin. It was like, I can't she's she's. It made me so mad because it's like I can't I don't have her same skin. But if we were identical twins, everything she got would seem within my possibility, and I would just get it too. If you had acne, she didn't. Identical twins don't have different then I would start cleaning my pillowcases or whatever she did, you know, like we were we should have the same thing. Um, all right, well sorry for that tangent. Let's take a short break and come back with UM. And I thought it was why do I care? But it's our weekly sports about it all right, we're back, give it to me The sports moment tears Andrew's weekly supports moment. Charles Barkley, of course, appeared on a podcast and told the host he named his daughter christ Christina Christine wait Christianna Christianna after a Delaware mall. He likes. There's a Christiana mall in Delaware that I always used to go by. That's how she got her name. Christianna actually said, you know what, that's better than looking it up in a baby book and me like, I just saw this name and I liked it on a baby website. I like this quote though. This is why he's so related. He's one of the most relatable sportscasters I think. When the host as why Barkley chose the name, he replied, I don't know. I just liked them all, dude, I love it perfect. I um yeah, I'm looking forward to having a baby my baby. Galleria sounds like a STDA West County mall, Fairfield County lit mall. I don't mind that. I think that's cute. And Christiana is a cute is a beautiful with a great It's a regular name. It's not like what would you would you right now, what would you name? Part of me would want to name it Marvin. Oh, I love that name. What's your grandma's name? By the way, Andrew's grandma, Um passed away two days ago yesterday, yesterday, at the age of one hundred. Amazing that when was her hundredth birthday. I don't know the exact day, but we had a zoom party for a hundred. So she died at one hundred. She made it a triple digits. Not one on one. Wow, that's so cool. Yeah, not one on one the buzz, just a hundred point seven the bull. Um. Wait. A second name was she? She lived in amazing life. She was amazing. Grammar Shirley, she's from Chicago. Originally is a cool name. She was married to my grandpa, Henry. Henry is a very That name is coming back pretty strong. Edna was a name I met this weekend at a meeting. Great and I go the fuck a young girl named Edna? Ago, were you named after a grandma? And she was like no, just and I loved it. Love that my grandma. Some fun facts she would uh. She my grandpa Henry, who passed away I don't know, maybe fifty years ago, and you know, he had a distinct look. He had a white mustache that my grandma like would make him grow, and he'd always wear like aviators. And he passed away, and uh, she got a new boyfriend pretty quickly. I mean they say to wait, I don't know half your relationship. She should have waited another forty years, but she waited about four minutes. I think she met the guy at the test and he's one of the Paul Bears. Uh yeah, you're digging a grave. You seemed like a night chie. Uh yeah. So he ends up she ends up dating this guy. He was a doctor's guy, nat and we never met him. First time we met him, he gets out of this like gets out of the car and my grandma. Every old man kind of tends to look alike in a way. They all, especially if they get like white hair, comes out with a white mustache and aviators. It's my grandpa, my grandpa. She just good for her. She like slim shadied it like she just like, uh love that what's it called? When um uh, what's that movie with Matt Damon where he like turns into the guy after he died. She pounded Mr Ripley her dead husband, who was amazing. My grandma hen was incredible. So this new guy was, Um, I'm trying to like. He was just like a strong like I don't know. He farted in golf when we play golf and during your back swing. Hilarious reason why someone's incredible. Yeah, yeah, he would fart and then he'd go like in your back Grandpa. I got close with my grandma later in life when they lived with her because I lived across the street with her and my other my grandma, Thelma, who wasn't They lived across the street from Grandma, but they were divorce. My parents were divorced, but they stayed. Your grandma stayed friend. The housing market kept my grandparents together, but not my parents. So um no, my grandma Henry was amazing man. He just was like but I didn't. I honestly like, I didn't like him that well, like Marvin's your other grandpa and Thelma. Soelma's a great name Jesus Christ. So then Nat dies, then my grandma gets another guy, this guy Sal white mustache Henry, Nat and Sal Henryn and Sal and then she banged him to death. Did you guys say anything to your grandma about this, you joke like a black widow that like, well that like these guys look like our grandpa. We would joke with my mom and stuff. I never really joked with my grandma about it, but my grandma. So I moved across the street. I started doing stand up a lot for the first time living across from her, and she got she was a real estate agent. She got really into theater, wanting to perform like in her seventies, like very like very late, and and she like started these plays and she was so like dramatic and like jazz hands. I never saw the play, but like it was like it was just amazing that like we'd see you know, photos and video of it of her just starring and being the star. And like later in life, like she became like Grace Kelly of her club. That's so cute. And so she would tell me, she's like, because I started staying up at thirty, like, yeah, it might seem late, but it's not late. I really see you being a star and like, you know, things your grandma would say. But she's like I didn't do it, Like she was inspirational in that way, and uh, I don't know. Yeah, She was amazing. She really was just so kind and always just I don't know, it's weird with your grandparents because you don't see them as people until you get older. You just see them as He's like mythical kind of. I mean, it's crazy that you had a grandparent, Like I mean, people in their forties do not have grandparents unless you had teen parents, you know. Yeah, um, so that's pretty cool. When did she start to go cognitively though? Where you she got dementia later in life. She was in a nursing home and uh, but she still would like get dressed to the nines. Her and her friend, her girlfriend, they go I forget what her girlfriend name was, but they go down to the nursing like the nursing hall, like fucking dining room, and it was literally like high school and they're going to be around for that long. They were all checking out, like the guys, and I think there might have been a relationship going on with one of the guys, but he had dementia. But he was married. But it's a perfect crime because neither one could remember them cheating. And I think at night, who gives a ship? You know, everyone should be fucking but yeah. So anyways, r I grandma and uh yeah yeah my last grandparents. God, I lost my last one in two thousand six fifteen. Yeah, Mimi, and she was the coolest one to just I mean, no offense to Grandma Glazer, but my mom's grandma was awesome and just so um like the so loving and like would I just loved. Uh, Marge is my mom, but I called her Mimi and she had ten kids and so she had like thousand grandkids and we all called her Mimi because I started it. And she she was just so gentle and like I didn't My mom wasn't a very huggy like touchy person, and my dad was. But I didn't really like like getting you know, my dad didn't like wasn't it. We didn't. I didn't get like a lot of like back scratches are like just like just nice gentle. But my grandma would just let me land her back and she would draw animals and I would guess what the animals were, and it was just like the most soothing fucking thing ever. I Marvin and Marge very similar names, like Marvin's kind of yes, And my grandpa would rub my back to go to sleep, and he had these huge hands. He was a really big guy and held just rub my back at night and like, so gentle, if you're a parent out there, rub your kids backs, rub your partner's backs. It's such a fun thing to do. And like do games where you like you know, spell out things or like drawing animals and have guessing games. And when Poppy the other night came over and wanted me, or I came over to Poppy's house and she wanted to just like lay on me and like hug me and like kiss me and like all these things. I was just like, oh my god. I just was like I'm so excited. I have someone that I get to like do these like snuggy things with and like because it's uncomfortable for me, especially with children, to like Arlot was going to bed the other night, Mrster was like hug Nikki and he was like no, and they were like do it. I go no, don't. He does not need to you go to bed. Arlow like, don't need to touch to me. But when a kid is like really, I just love it so much, but I never want to force it, but god, it feels good. I want to hear all the grandparents names. Bob was my mom's and then Edward was my dad's dad, and then Jean was my mom grandma's. Uh, Jean's a good name too. Let's get the fan tracks, They're so good. Um, We've got a lot to get through today. Can I read a quick thing I just got from um uh one of our listeners Brook. She said, Nikki, I needed to tell you how much of the podcast helped me today. This is from yesterday. First of all, I was feeling fat because I've gained weight recently. Then I also was feeling down because a guy dumped me at the what are we stage, which seems to be per usual, and I was just feeling broken because I know I want a relationship, but it can never seem to get one, to be in one. Your point of view made me feel so much better though, and that I am not alone and that most people in them are unhappy. So thank you, so so much, Thank you Brooke for that. I already left her voice my mom and was saying like it meant so much to me because it reminded me like, yes, that is true, Like we don't especially someone that is going to pull away from you at that stage, like as much as you wanted it and as close as you got, like it wasn't yours to have. I have to tell this to people who write me about, oh I didn't get this job I really wanted, Like, that's not the right job for you. The fact that you didn't get that one, it's going to pay out someday. It's going to be good that you didn't get it. I just promise you. And um, and also feeling fat like you, if you're feeling fat out there, God, I I know what it feels like. I've been there. And maybe you are fat. You know, maybe you're fucking fat. Right, You're meant to be fat today. You need to be fat to get done what you are going to get done in your lifetime. You're meant to be this way. Be kind to yourself. You didn't choose to be this way. Life is hard. You medicated with the food. It's better than doing heroin. You're not a bad person, You're not weak. Um, you just you just needed some comfort and you're allowed to and like acknowledging that and letting yourself off the hook for that and not being like a bad person. I think of a day, like, God, if I could Like, what if every day, no matter how you looked, you could just walk around like you loved yourself, Like like it wasn't a problem, where it wasn't a burden. Like what if you could just walk around with the confidence of j Lo at her like when she's getting out of a fucking limo on a red carpet. If you could just actually feel that way about yourself all the time. It is actually possible to look like shit, to feel grubby, to feel fat, to have mousey hair, but also like carry yourself like I'm still fucking great, and it really is possible. So try to harness a little bit of that today. I'm I'm gonna do so as well, because it's it's it's hard put on a sweatshirt you like, put on some pants you like. I didn't feel like I deserved a cute outfit today, but I fucking chose one, even though I'm pale and I feel stinky and I didn't take a shower. I put on a cute outfit because I was like, fuck it, I want to feel comfy. Um, let's get to the first voice memo. Alright, Uh, no name on this one, Hi, Nikky Andrew, Noah Um, I'm a bestie and I am somebody who has always had um as Nikki called them, kettlebell tits, um, and I've always have them, and I've always called them that, and I've never heard anybody else called them that, and so I was very um pleased to hear Nikki call them that, and so yeah, thank you for making me feel seen, Jackie chan Jack. That's a good one. I love. I feel like, Yeah, when I said that, I was like, God, someone else has had to think of this before, because it is so accurate of what they feel like. I haven't heard I think, is it in the opening? Yeah, it's like when your tips just feel like heavy and like just burdensome, and they feel like kettle bells. They're just so like these just fucking chunky utters, chunky thick utters. Yeah, my kettle bell tddy ladies out there, I'm not one today because I'm not on my p rod, but it's coming. It does have to be tough to have gigantic tits because people love guys love big tits, and then they couldn't be any words for your back and just being annoying. You don't feel sexual, you can't run fast. Because even a sports brol that's compressing them as much as possible, they're still going to be like this. But then you get so much admiration for him too. It's got to be a weird mind. Yeah, And it's a lot of admiration you don't even fucking want. And it probably started at an age where you were like, I don't even want to I don't even like boys or whatever. It's it's it's got to be rough. Next. Next, thank you for that from anonymous. No, no, small tits are great all right? Uh no, sh it, it undertakes a hard stance. Uh no h Next tip. Okay, this one is from m Dog. Good morning, o G besties. First off, thank you for using my voicemail for fan tracks. I love the pod. It was number one in my Spotify wrapped. Anyhow, I'd like to offer up a nerdy fun fact as I just heard Nikki talk about tapering off antidepressants and also how she likes to always have oatmeal in the mornings, and um, well, I've been taping off tapering off antidepressants, um that I was on for twelve years actually, and so I've been looking into a lot of the science behind serotonin production, and besides socializing and sunlight, most of it is produced by your gut bacteria when you eat certain foods, and for vegans especially, oats are number one for giving you a sustained boost of serotonin. Jack serotonin, Oh my god, very Jack Stanley. That's hilarious, And I want everyone who leaves a voice mesage now to sign off with a jackpot Um wait a second. That is very interesting, you know, thank you so much. I'm dog of for that sharing that because so often I take all these pills and I don't even know what the funk any of them are doing. I don't know how they work. I don't know. I could learn the basic science behind what these pills are actually doing to my brain, so I could see, you know, like I don't know what. I don't I don't know what because some are S R I, some of us are M A M A O I S some are are you know, there's all different kinds that are doing different things to your brain, and I never look into the science. So um m, dog, if you could send me any of the stuff that you're reading about serotonin, that might talk to me, like like explain, like I'm five on redditt e l I five, where it's like, explained this to Meek, I'm a dumb person. I would like to maybe understand what I'm on a pristique if anyone wants to tell me what the funk that's doing in my brain and how maybe I can uh, Because I I started, I was weaning off, and then I was getting sad again, so I go let me just like, not do this yet, and just I won't come as much as I'd like, but I'm back on my regular dose. But I've never been on pristique before, and whatever I'm doing right now, it feels really good, so so why stop it? Uh? Next, fan Trax, did you want to read one? Because yeah, I know I got a card for for you. Um, maybe we've read this before. It was opened on my counter. I don't know if you opened this, Andrew, or maybe I opened it and read it to you, but it says no, a quick note to tell you how much I have enjoyed getting to know you on the show. I love how you can jump in and in that singular voice soften or sharpen whatever the topic. Maybe thank you for sharing yourself even when I can tell it sometimes makes you feel vulnerable. It's a gift to us, truly. It makes us all feel less alone. You're a cool chick and I just want to meet and I want to meet you someday. Love. It looks like it, says Swanson. Swanson, Salm Swanson, Samson. Oh like the yes, Samson, I like the briefcase from Dumb and dumna. Um, that's so sweet. It was opened on my counter, so I don't know where. Um. This is from a bestie. I got over the um this is, says Oh, it's a little um token. It says too dicky from Candice, and it says good for I can turn this in for a shoulder to cry on. That is so sweet. Also a bunch of stickers. Oh my god, so cute. Um. Okay, enjoy these stickers. Portland turned me into a sticker head. All right, it says, Um, I don't even know how to read this. Okay. Oh my god, bestie, bestie, Oh my god, Nicky, I'm about to attend You're so in Portland. I'm so excited. I took your advice and I'm attending solo. I'm a loyal Nikki Lazer podcast listener and have caught up on all the YouTube? Are you up on YouTube? I absolutely adore your comedy and podcast, and no one keeps me laughing as good as you. I admire your raw honesty, insights about sex and orgasms I've never had one, by the way, and how confidently leaning too, your masculine energy. I relate to you so much and continue to be inspired by your story and life encounters. When life gets you down, know that the best seas in me in particular are rooting for you and cheering you on from the sidelines. Thanks to you, I've learned so much about coffee, addiction, sex, vibrators, vibrators, the amygdala, how there's no such thing as free will, um, healing, childhood trauma. The list goes on and on. I'm so grateful to you for being nothing less than who you are. Thanks for being you. I love you so much. Love bestie, Candice a Ka can't easy, can't easy? I love you. That's so sweet. God, damn it, you guys are so nice. One more that I got a letter this weekend. Um like breaking heart. Oh my god, it's like a Taylor Swift. Okay. It says when flow Color came out, I mailed all my best friends. This charm it's a little um. It's like Saturn with like a moon on it. Thank you for all you do, but mostly for the Taylor Swift dance parties. Next time I see you, let hope it's your concert. Oh Taylors with uh guitar pick ah an ever more guitar pick. That's so cool. Thank you so much, Kaylee. That's from Kaylee and a little charm that I don't know what the charm is in reference to. It's probably um a Taylor Swift song that I can't think of right now, but thank you so much, Kaylee. UM so nice. And there's a um on the cover of this card. There's a little bird looking in the mirror and it says did had to ask herself if the all over body wax had in fact been a very bad idea. And oh it's a chicken with like like cutie is. Thank you guys. Let's get to the next of a voicemail. Okay, I have two more voicemails. Uh, here's one from Jillian Hay Basties. This is Jillian from Los Angeles. Just hidden. I'm calling because, like Nikki, I have a SMR with people's voices, and I am obsessed with Andrew's voice, the tone, the way he pronounces words, the accent, everything about it. When he says your boy, it sends shivers down my spine. Um. Yeah, so this is a message for Andrew. Really, don't let Tom Sigura get you down. Let's don't let time get you down. Hey, Andrew, can I give you something to read so that, um, you can give her a little a SMR. You're gonna let's see, Um, your boy would be more than happy to. I'm gonna pick a random page from one of the books I'm reading. This is called The Fallen Rise. Fallen Rise, the Story of nine eleven. I'm gonna be a random page from I love this story. Um, okay, all right, so this is gonna be This is Andrew's SMR for who was that? By the way, Jillian, for Jillian your boys about to read. Um, I would say, I know, I know, Gillian said, she just likes your voice as is, but maybe trying to do a more like slower just so she can fall asleep to this, okay inside to stairwell? Are you mad? No? I mean, I just I wasn't trying. I know that you're annoyed that I gave you some direction before. I'm just trying to because I know that if I got to choreograph the voice I liked, I would be like so excited. So I'm just trying to make this good for Jillian. But she already likes it without the direction. Okay. Inside the stairwell at the seventy eighth floor sky lobby level, Brian and Stand skirted past flames that spurted through cracks in the wall. They didn't cross paths with the man in the red bandana or the people he led to safety. By the seventy floor, the air and the stairwell cheese. The air and the stairwell began to clear. Lights were on and the stair treads were dry. Brian thought they'd be safe. Stand grew steadier on his feet. The first person they encountered in the stairwell was a colleague of Brian's from euro Brokers, Jose Marrero, who had risen from the kitchen staff to become the firm's facilities manager. Jose, a married father of three who served with Brian as a fire safety warden, had led other Eurobroker's work down. Final thought, Final thought, Okay, now you can't get going forever. There we get to literally stop. We're gonna we'll keep going later to make more for Jillian. That is honestly, that was very soothing for me as well. I just bookmarked it. We'll get more. That was hilarious to read eleven and like story, it's so funny. I'm sorry that I'm not laughing about nine eleven. It's just it's it's a perfect thing to read a SMR style because it's so ridiculous. Jesus Christ. Okay. I also, yeah, I also have like Holocaust you know, uh, books about the Holocaust in my pants. Yeah, I have a propagate that Edward would read to you as a baby while he drew a penis on your back. Oh god, um, that's hilarious. But my grandfather died when my dad was eleven, so I never got to meet him. Okay, so I really would appreciate you. Okay, one more fan tracks, all right, this is the one I've been waiting for. Hey, Nikki Andrew, Noah, this is Pamela from Portland, Oregan. I love your show. It's something I look forward to every day. I have a story to share about getting a pedicure so you know, when you get a pedicure, you sit in those massage chairs that you have a remote too. Well, normally these chairs are nothing to cry home about. Well, I sit down and turn it on and play around the settings. As a woman starts taking a cheese grater to my foot. I don't know what setting I chose, but it starts needing and vibrating all the way down past my butt where my pussy is on the seat of the chair. It kind of feels like when you're grinding with a guy on a dance floor and you can feel a poke coming through. But like now, at this time, the woman gave is like she's gonna be a hardcore massage and I'm basically blacking out when she stops, like to ask you what color I wanted. I end up going with a more expensive option just so I could sit in the boner chair longer. Anyways, I tipped that woman really well, and I'll be a returning customer, all right, Love you all, jacklin Man, jack Knife. I really wish that I would have heard about the salon before we went to port I would have gone in Portland just to check out these chairs. Girl, will you d m us so we can give our Portland's busties a heads up of what Salon has this boner chair that is from hearing that she's right, and I like that she said instead of called home about, she said cry home about. That should be the new thing, Like no one's calling home anyway, text to him about, um, yeah, you're so right. Those chairs sometimes you get them. Sometimes they shake you in a way that it looks like you're making your boobs jiggle, and so you're just sitting there in your boobs are just like like kettlebells, just jiggling back and forth. And with the with the foot massage with a woman like touching, like just someone sent greater And I love that she picked up. She's like, can you draw a little butterflies on my Like just doing whatever will take you longer. Yeah, they're like, lady, you've been here for six months, and I love that you didn't even you tip the woman even though it was the chair that was doing most of the work, Like hell yeah, good job tipping well, good job getting yours. Good job. Like having an orgasm that almost made you like black out, And that is the great thing about girls orgasms, Like we can have them and be quiet. Sophie Buddle who opened for us. She was so you can follow her on Instagram and stuff at soafbuds buds but her last name is Buddle. She was just on James Cordon but she was doing a joke about female orgasm and how we just look ridiculous, We look like very still when we're doing it, and and she said that her boyfriend was like, did you just have did you just wake up from a dream where you were falling or did you have an orgasm? Because you know how sometimes you just go like like that, like that is seriously one of orgasm can look like sometimes it was so funny. She's great, she's awesome. Um yeah, I think how how how quickly can you? That would be reasonable? Getting new nails if that was you where you didn't look like you were going in just a fucking chair, Oh you could get it. You could just be like I just want to change over my nails right now, like you Coulogle every day and be like, oh, I just want new color on my nails. Some girls do that, I mean they just really likes are like wasting their days away just doing something. Yeah, makes sense, It's it's nice it's like, you know, obviously you're sit in those chairs. It's very soothing. Um, that was our show today. Great fan, Trex, think you quits so much. Keep leaving us voice memos and signing off with jack things. Um, so yeah, don't be cat there. Have a great weekend. We'll be back on Monday. We're gonna be in Los Angeles. Angie went to high school. Shout out good guy.