Between you and Nikki she is pondering the potential of finding a new roommate or living alone. Andrew loves Nikki's electric outfit which she put on to make a point. They talk about their aging underparts and talk more about a decision that was made. You Heard It Here First, charisma is a good characteristic, personal robots will get your name wrong and a reading of a cringe sext exchange. They overshare in The Blankest Thing segment when they discuss the horniest thing they've ever done and close the show by sharing final thoughts on horned up men!
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The Nicky Ger Podcast. Nicky Hello here, I am good morning everyone. You know, whatever time of day it is, I always say good morning. It's it's not even morning here. I don't even know why I say that. Um, welcome to the show. It's Nicky Glayser Podcast. It's Wednesday. Oh man, Um no, uh, how are you this morning? Good? Um? Um, I have like my caffeine rush. I know, I just liked timing had mine. I'm like coming out of mind, but I'm getting whenever I start the podcast, I get back into like kind of a caffeated frenzy. Um. I'm just very excited about it. Um. Yeah. I I just spend a lot of time talking to Andrew. We kind of discussed maybe um him moving out at the end of the year, uh and getting a place near by I And then I'm I'm trying to wrap my head around, like, Okay, who can I convince to come live here with me in his stead? Um? Uh? Like I just I don't know. Aya and Matt were here this past weekend, and I'm like, I know that Onya and Matt were both like it's pretty Like Anya was like it's great here, Like she like was looked at my neighborhood. She's like, you have a Starbucks and like and it's really all we need. She's like, you just this is the cutest little like part of town, and like they just were. She was enchanted by it. And it's beautiful weather right now and everything's just like looks idyllic idyllic um. But you know, she should come back in February and see if she still would want to be here. But it's also cold as fucking New York, you know, And so I asked her yesterday. I was like, will you guys move here? Because she can't come as visit as much as I wanted to, because oh, I'm losing so much hair. I just pulled out three strands and and before this, I was pulling out clumps. I mean, I didn't wash my hair since sets from Saturday until yesterday. So I'm reasoning that a lot is coming out from that time, not stressing out about it like I used to. It's gonna be okay. Yeah, I'm trying to get her to move here, and I got Andrew to move here, and I'm thinking about who could I get to fill that bedroom because I could live alone, but and I probably i'll see how it goes. Maybe if he moves out for a little bit to live alone, but I'll probably want someone. Oh there's the band aid that I was looking for. It's on my shoe. Um I thought it went down my drain and I was like, God, damn it, that's gonna clog. Um. Yeah, it's just like I maybe I don't know who I could move in here and who I want to live with. It's quite a commitment. I wasn't even sure I wanted to do a living situation with Andrew. It's tough living with the best friend, you know. Obviously, like stuff has transpired between us that wasn't fun, but we got through it and now we're pretty harmonious living together. But um, I don't know. When Kurson was here this past weekend, I would wake up in the morning feeling like Pete Diddy. Um No, I would wake up in the morning and or I'd come home at night, like one night I stayed at I went to the Rolling Stones concert the other night and she didn't go and I came home and everyone was already in bed and the place was like the counters were clean, like it just like looked like I was like oh, a girl lives here, Like it just wasn't The surfaces were clean. There wasn't like smudges everywhere. And Andrew's a smudgy guy. And listen, I'm a staying person. It's been a while and so I don't but grudge him. But it would be nice to live with someone who's super clean. That might impact me because I'm not as clean as a super clean person. But maybe I could learn a thing or two. But I would just like to It'll be I'm almost nervous to live alone to see what I'm like left to my own devices. And by devices, I mean Apple TV and my Roku. Have you had a like rotating friends like seasonally, maybe, well that would rely. That would be I need a friend who just needs temporary place to live, in which case they're homeless, in which case that's you know what I mean. Like I I was thinking I would love to live with Kirsten, but doesn't college anymore. She's married. I love to live with you. You're in a partnership, you live with your like everyone. That's why I picked Andrew. He was the only single friend of mine. Um, I know Carlisle would be down because she lives in the studio apartment in l A with her boyfriend and they you know, she's just so they've been in this box together for a while and I know that it would be a nice little change. So that could be something. Or maybe I just need to make a new friend and bring them on in, or um my mom can come safe for a little bit. I don't know. I I do know about that, that's a no. Um, but maybe I can live alone and does have a third bedroom, uh and and Louise, I can just get more animals. I don't know, but it's it's it's nice to have lived with Andrew for a year like that. Can't just go on forever. And I'm happy for him that he wants to, even because I even said, are you gonna maybe moving with it? GF? And he was like, I don't think so. I think it's too soon, but I think they might be talking about it, so um, yeah, we'll see. Um. I did go to the Rolling Stay, talk about going the Rolling Stow. Yeah, we talked about Turkey a little bit. Jagger, Yeah, that was like so they did like a tribute to Charlie Watts, the drummer that passed away at the beginning of the show. It was their first show without him. It's the first show of this tour, and this is their first tour ever without him, and so that was wild, and it was just really cute. They were all just mixed, like holding Keith's hand and then the other guy, and they're all just like touchy feely with each other and just sweet. I mean, there's they know each other better than anyone I know, because they've known each other longer than I've been alive. So like, the their connection is something I don't even understand. Um, And it's yeah, I hope Andrew and I go on tour someday and sell out the Dome or wherever. I was, Uh yeah, it was. I mean, there they they're going on tour right now. Go see it. It's worth it. I went to go see it because I was like, I was fucking so tired. It was the day after my show here. I worked in the recording studio all day long on Sunday, and I was like, I gotta go to Rolling Stones to night. Because my parents originally had really dope tickets from their friend who's like a commissioner of St. Louis, and then they couldn't go, and so they were like, do you want to go? And I'm like, I can't pass up the Rolling Stones. It's kind of like the thing that you go. They're not going to be around forever. Actually, I think Mick Jagger might outlive us, but um, I just you can't pass that up. And it ended up being really like an you was an You ended up going with me, and so did Matt and she was crying a lot, and not just because of the Charlie Watts tribute, but it's just it's it's so cool to see their enthusiasm for these songs that they've been playing so much. I can't get out of my head in these kinds of things. That's why I don't like Broadway, because I just know that they do nine shows a week and I'm just thinking, like, how sick of this they are. I'm projecting because when I used to do plays, I'd be like another one. And sometimes when I do stand up, I think that, um, not right now on my tour because I don't I have so many jokes to pull from that I can switch it up for myself and make it not boring. But I don't know, why do you ever think about that when you go to watch a performance, like especially Vegas, Like you know, the people doing all the acrobatics with the long sheets and things, the clay stuff. I'm like, God, they're so bored and you almost like resent the enthusiasm of like your audience. That's like Nate the Blue Man Group, and they're just like, oh God, I've been drumming on these paint drums for fucking two decades. What am I like? They're thinking of about other things, they're not like present. It felt like the Rolling Stones, however, were present and they were enjoying it, even though there's no way that they were actually as maybe I don't want to say there's no way. I really doubt, Like, how do you have enthusiasm to sing a song satisfaction when you have been singing that every single day and you hear it everywhere you go. I mean, I've heard that song four times since I went to the concert, just like at restaurants and stuff. How do you how do you have enthusiasm for it? How do you you fake it? And the audience goes, oh my god, he's really enjoying himself, but I mean he's I think maybe they actually were excited because it was kicking off the store. It was after COVID, But I don't know. I that's why I don't go to Broadway shows because I just I can't get out of the fact that they might not be enjoying themselves. What if um like Keith Richards and Mick Jagger just had like really really shitty jobs at some point in their life and they're just like so grateful they never have to do those jobs again, and that's how they keep it together. Can't keep gratitude going that long for like perspective of a shitty job. I mean, they've been doing They've been in bands, They've been in successful band since the sixties, you know, so it's like there's no way that they are like still like man, I just go back to the days when I was, you know, work in the register at Peter Pit, and there's just no way that they can still pull that. But I do think that they are were able to be happy. They were genuinely happy. I can I feel like I can see through bullshit and I was able to have a good time because I wasn't in my head about like, oh, they don't want to be doing this, they're old he just wants to like lay down for a second, like why is he still doing this? Who's making him do this? Um? They all genuinely still seem to love it, But I guess I'm just projecting of Like I I hate when I go get my hair done and the woman doing my hair is like, oh, I can't wait for the weekend this week. It's just like when people talk about like, oh God, I can't wait till this day is over. I'm like, you're still waiting on me, and you have to like now I feel bad that you're working, Like I don't. Like I just want everyone to enjoy the work they're doing, especially if they're working for me, so that I don't feel like bad for them. Like if if I'm getting a massage and she's like, oh, I'm so again for the weekend. I need a break, I'm like, you know, I just take a break now because I know you're miserable massaging my foot or whatever. You know what I mean? Does that Does that affect you when people complain like that? Like sometimes I listen to a like you know, I don't know even thinking that hearing Chandler on The Friends recaps, say and I didn't even watch that, you know, the Friends reunion, but he said he used to have like extreme anxiety about like will this line get a laugh? Oh my god, I'm so nervous, I'm gonna fail. Like he had whole seasons where he was not enjoying himself. He was just in hell. And now I go back and watch Friends, and it's taken some of the joy out of it for me, because I just know this person was miserable the whole time. And Taylor Swift, you know, when she was on the tour very you know, thin friends with all these supermodels. You watch her documentary and that was like a really hard time in her life where she was like starving herself, over working and just exhausted. And it's hard for me to look at that end and like watch those concert clips and know that she was like in pain. It like takes something out of it for me, if that makes any sense. UM, do you relate to that at all? Yeah? You know, I UM, if I'm interacting in in person with UM, I don't know, someone like a grocery store or something, and they just appear to be having a bad day, I don't get upset about it. I just kind of try to empathize and just understand. Okay, I've I've been there, so I'll just let them have their their moment and not ask too many questions or be like a new sites. But if there's someone like I was thinking about um the last time I went to ACE Hardware and one of the employees, one of the employees helped me with like a wrench, and he just knew so much about it. And at one point I was just kind of like blacking out and not hearing him anymore because I didn't understand. But I was like, Okay, just let him keep going. He's having a good time. Yeah, that's so nice when someone really enjoys what they do like that, like where you go. God, I could never muster any enthusiasm for this job, but these people seem to be enjoying it. There was an email that went out to everyone that lives in my building that said, you know, October four is maintenance worker Appreciation Day, and so we're gonna do like a bolletin board and have, you know, like celebration for everyone who takes care of this building. And this building is really well maintained. It's clean, it's just like clean I don't know, like the trash room is like spotless, like it's rare than a trash room, do you feel like almost like it's a it's a safe space to go into from my own apartment. I'm like, oh, I'm going to the trash room. It's gonna be so lean and like smell good. So my building is like great and they do a great job. And this email went out that said, hey, if you want to write a message to anyone or like say anything to them, will post like the comments on the bollets and board. I don't even know what they're gonna do with it. I kind of did. I skimmed the email, but I it was like putting it off because I was like, oh, I really want to write like a really good thing to tell them, like I want to spend a lot of time on it. And then I'm just putting it off because I'm like I don't have enough time to make it as good as possible. So then I just opened up my email was like, just send off something because it's quickly approaching and I don't want to miss out on it, and um, and I just wrote, like, you know, thank you so much for keeping our space clean. And taking pride in your work even if you know it seems like something I said something like, you know, it shows that you guys take pride in your work. And I'm sure some people are like I don't take pride in fucking vacuuming your hallway that I couldn't never afford to live here with how much I get paid to do this, and like it, there's part of me that goes, why should they take pride in this? Like, like I was saying the other day, when people bitch about KFC workers not being nice or Starbucks employees being rude, it's like, well, they shouldn't be nice. They don't get paid a living fucking wage. And I'm I'm you know, but that's I kind of felt like, don't just assume these people take pride. But whatever is going on, this building runs great, and I just wanted to make them feel I love that my building is even celebrating them. It's so sweet because they are always nice and they are always nice to my dog. And I just wrote a thing and I'm wondering if I can like donate a gift card or something that I don't even know. I don't know how many there are because that's when you get into territory of like then you gotta buy all of these things. So I don't know what I can do, but um, I do you know, if everyone just did what they loved, we wouldn't have garbage men. But maybe there are people out there that love picking up garbage and love like the the helping the community and keeping the community there. I'm sure there's people that are passionate about that. But you know, not every job is going to be something that people can find purpose and and uh and in a job that makes them not look forward to the weekend. Ever, you know, most people, even I look forward to the break even though I enjoy my job, So maybe I shouldn't take it so personally. I don't know. I'm and again maybe I'm just projecting because I really am sensitive about when I'm on stage to not if I'm having a bad day I don't want to tell the audience or if I'm depressed. Like back when I had to do our podcast last year and I was going through a terrible depression, I couldn't be anything about honest about the pod like being depressed. I don't think I ever I could have maybe said I hope. I never said I don't want to do this podcast right now like that, because sometimes I hear people making entertainment and they say like I don't want to be here right now. I'm just like, there's then I don't want to listen to this, Like then don't because then what's the point. No one needs you to do this, And it's like, Okay, well I have a contract or whatever, but um, I just want my entertainers to be happy. I can't. But that's about them line Like if I go to a show and I sense it all that they're like unhappy, that makes me so mad when you learn someone you know, I know of a couple of people that are nightmares to work with, and while on camera they're just pleasant and fun, and then the camera stops and they're not cool, and that that's that's a form of this of like not being authentic or um and and deceiving your audience. Like I just that's why I've made this tour with my best friends because I want to be in the best mood for my audience. Because if I'm having a good time, even if I'm not funny, if I'm having a good time, they'll have fun. And that's not to say like some people just go on stage and get wasted and if they're having a good time, because they're wasted, but it's a sloppy show. But if you're not wasted present having a good time, you can honestly not be funny and people will still laugh and have a good time with you. The key is get to a place where you're enjoying it, and enjoyment is infectious. Um So that's and obviously that's why I designed this podcast to be something I always look forward to. And I truly have never dreaded this podcast, not even once yet. I mean, not, go on, fucking would I don't have anyone around me, but um count the stairs running up from my parents basement. Whatever that one girl did superstition thing. Um, I just yeah, it's it's such. I'm so privileged that I have a job that feels so good and that I'm actually like I look forward to going there in the morning. And by going there, I mean walking into the bedroom that is one ft from my door. Don't come and murder me. Uh not that that gives a coordinates of where I live or anything, but please don't. Um let's get Andrew in here and get into the rest of the show. And what up, Doug, how's it going? How did you sleep as night? I mean that outfit is electrifying. Okay, thank you, I just I didn't. I bought it in Florida when we were there in West Palm, I bought it. It sacks, there was a set. It's fucking bad, as banks. Man, it's a little too much, but I decided to wear it today. I don't think it's enough. I mean, this is like, yeah, oh yeah, you gotta describe it for our audio listeners. Maybe we give certain audio listeners like hey, you gotta go on YouTube if you want to see it in three days. Yeah, yeah, if you want to know what I no, no, no, you can describe it. It's hot pink. I mean I was describing it. It's hot, hot pink, and it's spandex e and the shoulders are showing. The shoulders are showing, you shoulders, it's cropped tank top, and then the it's it's a long hot pink and then it is a long uh you know, like leggings, also the same color. I don't even think YouTube will do it justice though, Like it's might be the brightest outfit I've ever seen. Yeah, I mean my spray tan is perfect, so it just looks like I can't wear this if I'm paling out. And so my spray tands pretty pop and right now. And I saw some pictures. I put up a picture yesterday of um me recording in the studio and I look really flat chested, and I just want to remo. I think that people are gonna be like, she stuffs her bra so and I my boobs are kind of hanging out of this top. And I'm not wearing it to be like, look, I have boobs, but likes fucking proof, so you are wearing it to show you. I'm not. I really am not doing that. It just happened. I was like, should I put on a braw underneath this? Then I was like no, who fucking cares? But I I didn't specifically do it. I just put on this and I go, oh, it looks like I boobs, And I go, actually, that picture yesterday, it looks like I was flat. So I bet I need to I need to up. I need to inform the public that yours are like flat earthers, Like they're like, no, she's flat. I swear it's flat, and they're like, no, they're round, right, I mean someday they like, like I was saying on the show the other day, when you're wearing a braw let with a shirt underneath it, like your boobs just lay flat. They look amazing naked flat, but like they lay flatter, and so from the side it looks like you don't have any chest. But and not that having no chest this is a bad thing. I just happened to have a chest. And your kids hang more now than like, do you feel aging in your tids? No, I honestly don't. Interesting. I think they're only getting better with age because my balls are like a hundred and forty years, really are they? Do you feel them sagging? They're like an old mummy. They're just like really, I guess I will just grag on over here. It's Brendan Fraser down there too. You your balls, you do sometimes you look at them because balls are labia, right, And I definitely feel like sometimes of the month, my stuff down there is a lot more like just like mummified, like you were saying, like, it's just like things are dropping, not dropping, but mummies have no skin, by the way, But you get what we're saying. They just look like, Um, what's a good example of like just like an old like a change purse? Yeah, yeah, you know, like or like that dog was found in what's that dog's face? What's that dog that has a bunch of lasers layers? Yeah or something? Yeah? Yeah, my balls are at a sharp like a sharp pay would nut? Were they always like that? Or were there times that they were up? Do you feel them sagging over over time? I feel like, well, I mean, look, temperature has a big factor exactly, that's the temperature, and like hormones make my vagina either like or like and horny nous too. So if you were going to sleep with a guy for the first time, what's your perfect vagina? Town? Cold? Cold? Like? Why is the thirty degrees in here small? No? I don't worry about that anymore, but because sometimes I mean, I just feel like, God, there's things I want to say sometimes that I'm just like, no one needs to hear this, but I recently got into, um, the idea of having a fat Like I've never wanted my vagina to be described that way, but sometimes when I'm really horned up, and there's been a lot of action, and I've like there's been like buzzing things down there and like things just like a lot of blood rushes down there, and it's like it gets like plumper. Let's say, it looks like a boxer's eye, ye yeah, yeah, or a guy got stung by a bee's at the end of that movie with the home alone kid, Oh my god, and your asshole looks like a vander Holeyfield's ear. I wish I wish it was that hot. Yes, exactly, Like it looks like it's just like engorged more and like just there's it's just like and it's I I like that now, like when it's just like like a little bit yeah beat up, like where it's like it's not even like there's no saggings to it. It's like plump. And some would say, man, you're pussy's fat right now, And I'm like, thank you. I think that that's hot because it also like makes more friction. Yeah. I mean, look, I think any kind of fruit you eat, you like a plump fruit. Yeah, I want to I don't want to pair or a peach that's fallen apart. I wanted to be filled with juices. Yes, yes, just like my lady. I'm just like me lady. Yeah. So like I guess when your vagina is plump, it's like a heart on your vagina is hard. Yeah, like when all the blood rushes down there, like you get, I definitely get, like you pumped it up like some you know, nikes in the nineties, like a tire for your bike that you probably Yeah, those were so cool. I was so jealous that girls didn't have those shoes. They made them in women's not that I saw that I was allowed to get. Maybe my mom was like, they don't make them in girls, So that was why then I didn't get them. That's why you have to shop at pay less and where penny loafers without any pennies in them. Yeah, pay Less, what a weird shoe on a penny loafer? Would they put an actual penny in it? Yeah, that's for a penny. I don't like four a me because back in the day, a penny was like you were good good. We have a friend Kyle don again, who has a bit about songs in the nineteen like twenties and thirties that were like, well, like on a nickel in my pocket and I'm running around and it's always like if you back the thirties, there was a nickel in every song. If you had a nickel, you were good to go out. Yeah, well yeah, no. It is interesting that no one came out with like the quarters shoot like because back then a quarters too much to just keeping your shoe. You would need it every day and it would really weigh it down. Pennies are so worthless back to like this outfit this, I can wear this on the podcast, I'm not wearing this out and about that girl wants to be seen, that girl wants attention. It's just if you're in Miami, you could rock that, yeah, because everyone's because everyone's dressing like you were all black in Miami. I was telling our listeners that we might be parting ways at the end of the year in terms of how you turn it out now. We were just talking about like if you if you move, you've got to move out eventually. This isn't forever yea, So it's not going to be forever and count down and plays. No, I think we're leaving on a healthy tip. If I leave, you don't know what's could happen in the next three months. That's true. Two months Fuck God, this year's passing by. Actually, this year's kind of crawled. I can't believe we've lived together for less than a year. It feels like way longer. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. I mean, I think people say that's a terrible thing. Yeah, but it doesn't feel like it's me. I've liked living with you. I felt like time has flown here. I feel like we don't get to watch TV enough as much as I wanted to. It just doesn't our. Our schedules don't line up, like I really wanted a partner in TV watching. And we did get through some good stuff. We did The Morning Show together, we did Love on the Spectrum the other night. Um, we watched you did not ever get on board with Bachelor in Paradise. I could not have a friend in you for that. Um, I couldn't watch The Wire with you. I mean, what our shows to be consumed together? I really just that's what I really wanted a partner for. Yeah, I think I think maybe I didn't. Maybe you didn't know how much TV you watch alone. Not only that, what I watch, Like I watch a lot of sports, like a lot of sports. Any sports, drug highs like you. If we go over the amount of TV you've consumed, it's it's a crazy amount plus sports. Yeah. Uh yeah, I don't want you watch a lot of shows you do. And I'm not judging. I know, I'm just trying to think. I mean, well, during COVID, yeah, I don't leave the house. I don't go out that much. Um, but I just wanted more like I wanted you. I think I wasn't ready to sacrifice my time to watch something I didn't want to watch. It's like you want to do that. But I do think we we got through all of VEEP. We got through Uh we did? I did? I did f Boy Island, I did uh Morning Show? I did? You did the morning show? I will say on your own? And then you rewatched it with me a couple episodes? Yeah yeah, um what about marriages? Marriage scenes from marriage? I would get into that. Did you watch the second episode? Oh god, I couldn't do it. I tried to because I was like listen, because I know that by myself I can't get through anything. I just I need someone there to comment on it and like spark my interest. Did you watch anymore that? Mr Corman? I tried for three minutes and I just couldn't. I mean, the scenes from a marriage. I liked the first episode as but that that, oh boy, the character, what they did with the woman. Yeah, I just like feel like women are written for to be like complete twats constantly in TV. And I already have a problem with people actors and actress is not acting and like scripts that no one talks like that. And I understand it's supposed to be theatrical. It's supposed to suspendous belief these people are doing. If we just watch the way people talk, it wouldn't be that interesting, even though I beg to differ. But like Jessica Chastain's character cheats on him spoiler alert, Sorry, it's the second episode. I'm not giving away anything else. No, no, no, she was having an affair and she that's who she's texting the whole Remember, I go, who'd she texting? And you were like, it's something work related? No, no, no, she was in a relationship. She fell in love with a guy. She tells him about it, and she tells him about it and it's like and so I'm leaving and she's like a bit to him about it. And I'm like, no one would present it that way, like yeah, she would be like, I'm so sorry I fell in love with someone else, like but she's just like mad at him about it, and maybe she feels like you're the one who pushed me into his arms, but she doesn't present it that way, so it just seems like she's like, clearly, whoever wrote this, I'm guessing no, will you look up who wrote scenes from a marriage? Because I think it was a man who has a beef with a woman or a woman that is a beef with a woman, Because if I were Jessica Chastain, I'd go, no, no, I'm not doing this. And I mean, maybe she doesn't have a choice, but I think his fear is going on a scripted show and having to act like a twat when no one would ever act that way. I mean, but I do. I'm not trying to play devil advocate here, but I think there are people that probably go, hey, I cheated, and before you could even I'm going to get ahead of it, before you could tell me that I'm a terrible person. Here's the reason why I did it, And now you have a weaker argument. The thing is with her though she is presented as a character we don't think is capable of being so yeah, like it doesn't fit with her character. And even you know what in White Lotus, what's her name's uh, the coach Taylor's wife. Yeah, Connie Britten's character just repulsive, repugnant. I just like I I hated her and I was just like, this is the This is a character of a like a you know, a nagging, mean wife. There's nothing red about her. And I love Mike White and I love the way he writes, but it just didn't You can make a one why do you want a character to be? Why is he married? Why are they married? Well? She had she made a lot of money in the show, right, so does this girl. They both have strong I don't know. I think you can subtly make someone deplorable without making them just so over the top terrible. And I think, honestly, I think these kinds of characters of women that are portrayed and written by men reinforce men's hatred of women and women's hatred of themselves. Like it, it doubles down on what men already think women are, and like, watch it and go, yeah, all women do is fucking complain and cheat on you and then blame you for it, and it's just like it's not good. And it's like, if you're a woman and you're successful and what you do well, then you've got to be a then you're also a bit. Yeah, you got to be a bit to be successful, is what it's saying. I guess, So who who wrote it? What's his name? It's like a Ingmarman? Yeah, Mark Bergman's like the son of a priest. But who wrote? Who wrote on this? Like, who's the writer? Guys Levy now? Or is that a man? Okay, well I'm not saying that, like it's definitely that because it's a man. But I was right, and uh it feels good. It feels good to be right. Yeah, you're always but I just I mean, I'm trying to watch No I'm wrong all the fucking time. I'm trying to watch Bachelor in Paradise. And now that Kendall and um grocery store Joe, grocery store Joe is with So the whole thing is like I knew this couple grocery store show and Kendall Kendall used to work on my show Not Safe. She ended up just going on The Bachelor, becoming like going pretty far on it. She's just a girl that worked in the art department of on TV shows, ends up going very far, ends up in the Bachelor fanchise world. She goes on matchlor Baradise, meets grocery store Joe. This is you know, five years ago. They end up dating for two and a half three years. Such a cute couple. I meet grocery shore Joe while I'm doing Dancing with the Stars. Then they send them both to this Bachelor in Paradise because they've since broken up. Joe lives in Chicago, Kendall lives in l A. He wanted her to move there. She wanted him to move there. They broke up. They were still in love, but they were like, logistically, this isn't gonna work. They go back on the show after having been broken up for a while, and they send old Joe in first, and he falls in love with Serena, who's this adorable. She's thirty five, he's thirty five, she's twenty three. They fall in love. She's so cute. She's like just probably thirty something. Third at least I would say thirty, but maybe thirty two at the most Um and he falls in love there and then Kendall comes in later. The producers planned it perfectly. If they would have brought Joe and Kendall together, they would have fallen in love again, end of story. But instead Joe falls in love with Serena. Then Kendall comes in and Kendall's like, Joe, I'm still in love with you, and he's like, I'm like with Serena right now, Like this isn't any He handled it perfectly. He's such a gentleman. Was really respectful of Kendall. Also um respectful of Serena, but also Kendall when it moved to Chicago for him, right, he moved to Chicago from l A. Didn't you say that? I don't know if he moved to Chicago from No he was, He tried l A, didn't like to move back to Chicago, wanted her to move to start a family and everything, and she's like, well, I still want to be in l A. I want And I think she was willing to reconsider that. That's why she went on the island to like But he didn't know that at the time that he was following me. Yeah, and then he so he's already fall in love with Serena, and he tells Kendall like I've moved on. I'm sorry, and she's just like so sad. She leaves the island and Joe's talking to the camera. He's like, if she wanted to, like reconnect, she should have told me before I came here, and it was like, oh no, you Like if I were Kendall would be like, so I had a chance, but I missed it, Like it just breaks my heart. Like everyone's like I love Joe and Serena together and I'm like no. I mean, coming from the perspective of a girl who gets back with her ex a lot and has over the years, I'm just like, no, I don't want the new girl to come in and like ruin this love story that just the timing wasn't right. But now they can be together. So I'm like I wrote Kendall though on Instagram, was like You're the bravest woman in the world. Because she'd have to like sit there and watch Serena and Joe, the guy she was with two and f years. She used to watch them like make out and dance in the moonlight and tell each other they love each other, Like there was a date that they were on in front of all the people that were like around the rest of the group. It was brutal. Noah, have you ever seen a guy that you were dating like kiss another girl or like move on that had been dating. I have a friend who's going through that right now, and um she we all witnessed it on Instagram. I got and the right exactly that's where she was seeing it all on Instagram. And it was like, literally the guy broke up with her and he's already dating some girl, and she's like they you know, they were breaking up and getting back together, breaking up, getting back together, and this time they broke up and he was he already had someone else available. So she just going through that. I felt it was heartbreaking for me to see my friends stuffer through that. You did a really good job, Andrew. When your last relationship you like muted blocked, not blocked, but muted, vollowed and did not go back. And look, Oh I wish I was that strong. It's so much easier for me. I mean, it is the smart thing to do. They make everything like a small town like that's how it is. And there's one you just yeah, you just see you're gonna see the person you're dating, dating your best friend because there's no other options. I feel like this guy that you're talking about, Noah, might be just doing it to get at her, because a lot of times there's just like retaliation just seeping out of their embraces that they're putting online. It's like, if you need to put your relationship online all the time to be like I love this person, It's like, what are you really if this is just between you two, just keep it with you? Why do we all have to see this? You can, you can say that you love the person and put like on their birthday and stuff, but there's other motives here. Yeah, there could be motive if you're definitely getting right out of relationship and you're like, oh my god, I like it's so over the either that new person needs that validation, which means that's unhealthy, or you're trying to get back at your ex, which is also unhealthy. It's just not a good sign if you have to publicly be like look at me, I'm like, how long is how long? Do you think? Depending on I guess, depending on how long you're in a relationship, how long can you post on Instagram with another person that where you're not a complete piece of show. I remember when Chris and I first got together, he didn't want to like post anything about it because he knew that an x that you know, he had a Kendall and Joe situation where they just didn't want the same things for their future, but they still loved each other and broke up. And they were broken up for a year or so before we get together, and he was just a little bit like, I don't want to she hasn't moved on yet. I don't want to rub it in her face. And I was I was okay with it. I was like that, actually, like he's going to do that for me when we break up, you know, I'm going to be taken care of too. And that just like made me feel good actually that he actually still thought how long did he wait? Still waiting? I know? I mean like it just happened naturally. It wasn't like you remember the first post he put up of you two. No, No, he actually didn't have his social media when we were together, so um, it was more about like telling his family or anything. No, it wasn't that he told his family. It was just like he didn't want to. I just remember him being mindful of not having stuff somewhere where his ex could see before she had, like he felt she had moved on, which you know is also a little bit like you can't control other people too, So there's a little bit of that. But I just thought, oh, that's kind of sweet that he even considers someone. Um, let's get to the news. Okay, apparently here we go. Yeah, oh man, it's Wednesday. You know what that means. It's Wednesday? And uh, I hope you're having all the swells out there. We sure are here. Um yeah, great little day over here and Louis um. A study found that charismatic people have better sex. Additionally, those who rated their partner as having higher levels of charisma, we're found to have a higher sexual satisfaction. Okay, um, yeah, charisma probably means you're like a little bit of a wait, they have high higher satisfaction. Yeah, and they and they I guess they satisfy their partner more. I think people who are charismatic, that's a that's a word that doesn't evoke like desperation. It just means like they're like fun and they like enjoy life, so they're probably getting a lot of enjoyment out of sex too. That makes sense. I feel like there is a line between charisma and neediness, like at a party, you know what I mean, Like, Oh, that person is so charismatic, they're smiling, like they could overdo it because they're just charging connotates like insecurity more than charisma. Chrisma. I feel like it is genuine and I could be wrong. What do you feel? What do you feel? No? I I agree with you, Nikki. I love very positive about charisma. Yeah, chrisma. I remember hearing Um Sarah Silverman say that in a Rose choke of Jimmy Kimmel. She's like, oh, Jimmy, you're yours as charismatic. She's like the chrisma of ah. I forgot what she said. Or maybe Amy said that Um Anthony jessel Nick had the charisma of a Hitler youth. Yeah, maybe that was when I heard chrisma. It was in some bros choke. I love. I love a good word that doesn't alienate everyone. Chrisma is not used enough and I like it. Chrisma. Car I don't think people have good charisma. I think a lot of people are either too like you said, trying to be too charming, or they're too extroverted and they're like like me and I'm gonna have this kind of energy and it could get confused with charisma. Have you ever been called a word and you didn't know the meaning of it and you almost were like you had to look it up? Yeah? How would people describe you? You think, like, like, what did they say? He's uh, I don't know why. I was called during a soccer game one time a slur that wasn't pertained to me and I didn't know what it meant. Really, Yeah, what what did they say? I can't say that it was a Spanish slur? Oh my god, I guess I was tanner that week by another player. Yeah. Nice try. And I was like, but I'm Jewish, you know Then that I was like, okay, I'll go back to THEE give me the other one. It sounded, um, yeah, I don't know. I think people say that I'm personable, that I'm not, that I'm friendly, that I I don't know. Um. That was like a question I asked when I was starting to get to know someone on a dating app. I asked, what are three adjectives that you're like, write your best friends and asked them three adjectives to describe you and don't say like what it's for and just to be honest. And I wrote Anya, and she she knew it was for guys, so she was like gazelle, Like, uhive, No, I am gazelle, like sensitive and fast paced or something like that. It was like that, and or oh, whip smart. It was really nice. What would be three negatives? Oh a lot um uh opinionated, loud, um, anxious, uh um, I know it all. I would be lazy uh um, selfish, selfish or yeah, narcissistic, not thinking of others that live in their house when it comes to recycling stuff like that, or recycling thinking about the planet not so much meat, No, just you. I don't give a shit about the planet. I just give a about that. I know. I wish I could inspire you to care about the planet more than you know. The fear, well, yours came from your fear of your dad. Initially, now it's get I mean initially, no incident. It came from my dad educating me about like when you leave a light on, there's a power plant burning somewhere. To keep that light on. Like think about there's some there's billows of soot going into the atmosphere because this lamp you had to have on in a room where no one was using it. And I was just like, oh, that had me. So now when I leave a light on in a room, I'm like, I picture that like smokestack, like like you know, all the thing. That's a lot though for just I get what he was doing there. But that's kind of like telling the kid if you go down that door, there's a wolf that will chew your head off. It's such a but what it's the wolf is analogy is not true. This is true there energy, you're one light, though there's a piece of that smoke that is there because of that light. There's a molecules of that smoke, like I am contributing to that, Like every little bit counts. And if you think that, oh, I can just throw this plastic in the garbage, because it doesn't matter which I've done before. Where I go, I can't find recycling. If everyone does that, then there's plastic in the landfills and then then it bleeds over into the ocean. Like every you can always justify, but it's this much. Well, millions of people go, it's this much, and then it's so it doesn't better and it is a good analogy, but yes, I understand it. It's kind of fear based and guilt based, which you know, I don't know it kind of it works. I guess it works. Yeah, No, but I got called Greg Proops, who is an amazing has amazing vocabulary, once called me deft, and I truly don't even remember what. I looked it up at the time and I go, it's felt. He said in a way that you're very deaf. You know how he liked talks like this. It's like you're has anyone told you you're deaf? And I was like, like, deaft punk? And I didn't know, but it's not daft? What do you think it means? Because I forget it was a compliment. I know that I was thinking deaf is like you don't listen, because I would never think that that was part of it. Was deaf as d E a F deat is d E F T. So they I don't think they would be from the same. What does it mean? Noah, you put a penny in your shoe. Neatly skillful, and quicken One's movements. Yeah, neat neat is not adjective. I would just describe myself. But and then I also Dave David Tell the first time I ever met him, called me defensive and I didn't know what it meant. You're so defensive, And I was just like, I don't know what that means. No, him not, which is exactly what I had no idea. My friend Katherine was like, Nikki, you don't know what defensive means. And I've never played sports were like defense. I mean, I probably could have gotten there, but I mean I was twenty five and I didn't know what defensive meant. I was so like where I am now in terms of like emotional development is so like far beyond what I was capable at the age of five. I had no it wasn't twenty five. It was two thousand five, So I was twenty one just so had no fucking clue about anything. So don't lose hope on anyone in your life to not be able to like become more emotionally evolved or self reflective. I still have a lot of work to do, but to not know what defensive meant in two thousand five, but it's true. It's not actually death story. Okay, next story def Ham drip def jan drop. The league documents revealed that Amazon Do you know about Amazon's Astro? Have you seen this? It's so it's like a a room ba, but it has like a screen that like sees faces and like essentially it will be even more your friend in a room, but but it doesn't clean it like well, you know, maybe tell stories to your kids or like it will like identify like certain behaviors. Yeah, it's called the Astro, and people are saying it's it's not as great as Yeah, that's the thing. It looks like Wally, but that's how it takes all your information and ruins your life because it's so adorable. Yeah, I mean, I'll be okay with that thing turning on me and murdering me. It looks like that. It's so adore. It's so cute. It looks like a little black cat. It looks like Buzzy. It looks like your cat. Noah, wait, so hold on, are you gonna play a video or something? What does it talk? So people are saying it's just a camera on wheels, like it's not that impressive. Engineers who worked on Astro, said it's fragile and prone to self destruction, aren't we all? Astro is terrible and will almost certainly throw itself down a flight of stair Cute if presented the opportunity, or becomes pregnant, says it's weird. I love how you tried to get that joke in before I start talking, and it's a good one, so I'm glad you did. I love my room, but so fucking much. And I just realized I haven't like spend any time with room but in a while, and I feel like bad. And also Luise, I love you too. But Roomba, I mean, I cannot believe how much I love that thing. But you don't think a camera in your house at all times? I mean no, I don't want that. And that's why when I do the clear um at the airport so you can bypass the security, I didn't do the eye thing, like there's a way for them to do the eyes and there's a way to the finger, and I go, no eyes and they're always like, why not eyes? Just two eyes? And I'm like no, But the thing is they already have our eyes. They have everything that one more you know, there's there's cameras sucking everywhere. There's that would go back to your thing. Though like a little bit more that they know, like it adds up like over time. But at this point their technology is so advanced that they can get my eyes without me knowing it. Like we don't have to invite these things in our homes anymore. They they have it all like it's it's that's a good point. But that's not to say that I don't try to have security in my life and privacy and not. No, that's actually not true. I don't. I'm I'm exposed. I could be literally all it is. It's like there was in the video there like you can have it, get a drink for you, And I'm like, what are we doing here? Like where you're paying a thousand dollars for one to get a bud light for you? You know what I mean, it's pretty cool one. I mean, I will say that I feel ridiculous when I do it. But when I go hey Siri, Hey Siri, she usually she says, yes, hey Siri, where are you? She says swifty she would see I'm saying how are you? I go where are you? But sometimes I'm able to find her by saying, like, will you train to call you a swifty? Because for a while she was calling me blithe. I don't know why, but I sat on my phone weird and she goes, okay, Nikki, from now on, I'll call you blithe. You're blithe. And it was happening forever blithe around the house on that's me. But but now I'm swifty. Now I wanted to call me a swifty. I thought blithe was like some character. This was literally five years ago. I sat on the phone in a weird way and all of a sudden serious, just like, thanks, Nicky, from now on, I'll call you blithe. And I was like, that's so funny. What the fund did she hear? So? Yeah? I love that I can when I lose my phone, I can go hey, Siri, where are you? Don't do that? Not now, but like I can do I can. I can find my favorite thing with series, like the song thing, like what song is this? Really? She's a oh is that what that is? I always pressed sham, oh, no, you can just do it on your phone, really a phone? What what song is this? And now I'll just I don't know, really can you just sing into it. No, no, it's gotta be playing in the background. These are the things like it's like the Tesla having the fart app. I was like, that's oh my god. One time we got into a Tesla on an in an uber and we know from Kyle Dunnigan's car. He's the same one that was did the joke about the nickel You're good to go. We he had a Tesla first of all of our friends, and we got on one day. He was like, check out this fart app and it's just like you can make any seat fart in the whole tesla. And we got into an uber. I think a couple like a month ago going tend to do a show and I just don't. I'm doing my makeup, I'm thinking about the show, and Andrew's like, can you make it fart? And I just go and go no, he can't. And he's like, every tesla can make it fart and if they tell they can't, they're lying. Sounds like a woman that's true. No, I never fared. And then six months you're on the Tesla and they're like and like, what s that? You know? That was that was you? You're like We're in a ford focus Branda fart in front of me. I don't think I brought it up on the part. I mean I was going to bring it up, and then I go, she probably doesn't want people. Yeah, just nine times I ran out of songs. I kept playing songs to cover up the noise, and then I kind of what this dude, Oh my god, I had sex and good job, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was orgasmine and I got a cramp in my hamstring at the same time. So so you were screaming and screaming. Yes, it was wild. What did it sound like? Oh? I guess what the position were you and what why did this happen? I had my legs around my ears. Uh no, I was on I was it was doggy style, and I guess my knees were bent and I could feel you know, when a cramp, it will only like a foot cramp that if you keep holding it's just gonna get you get it worse somewhere. You got to move it. But you can't move it because I'm about to have an orgasm for sex, which is doesn't happen that often with me, you know. So I was so excited and then like literally the cramp got as bad as possible and the orgasm was as good as at the exact same time. It was like it was awesome. It was intense, Like the worst pain and the best happiness are you able to have? So you are able to orgasm, drink sex more oral than Okay, well that's good. Yeah. I'm usually like I start oral and then I can never get them to fish were cramped? Well no, no, no, never your hip. I've never I've gotten like paint, like muscle pains where it's like how this position is like really not good and like it hurts so much it takes I need to be very focused and have no other pain happening, Like I need to like think about my vagina and like only feel there to get anything going, So any kind of other distraction it's gonna throw me. Like my hair, Like if a piece of hair get then I'm out start. I pulled Prenna's hair, but for some reason, I just pulled. Oh I don't even want to hear about it, Like I mean, like, okay, let's sake a quick break and we'll come back with why do I care? Why do I care? Never know? Why do I care? Alright, a bunch of cringe e texts between Elizabeth Holmes and her ex Elizabeth Holmes, that one, the one who talked like this and learned that men will do anything you want if you just take on a lower voice and still have the appeal of a hot woman physically, but you have a lower voice, so men respect you more. Okay, by a man, Elizabeth Holmes, what were you written by a man? How dare you say that I was not written by a man. I'm hungry and I'm a bit and I wear jewelry and love shoes. That's okay? What did Elizabeth? Elizabeth Homes and her boyfriend, So all their texts released over to fraud trial, so you would think all their texts regarding Paris would be released. But like all our personals, that seems to be a little bit of an intrusion. You would really think, I'm literally trying to go as low as you can. It's still not as low as Elizabeth. She's done here, like don't here? Okay, So what did the text say would be hotter if I had a lower register like this? Well, when you go like this, it's not hotter. But if you just talked like that, maybe if I just talk like that, would that be hotter? No, because you sound stupid, because you're going so not that many texts like that that I saw all was like that. But here's one from Elizabeth Holmes too. You're gonna love the response. So she writes, you are the breeze in desert for me. You are the breeze in desert for me, my water, my water, and ocean and ocean meant to be only together down and to be only together tiger, and the guy just writes back, okay. Brutal still with this guy, no, I think they're broke. First of all, they are. He's like a ceoo of some company, you know, he's like very Oh my god, I I feel so bad for this woman who lied to everyone, both stole money and and ruin families. Oh my god, he just wrote okay back to you are my ocean and the desert just wrote okay. And by the way, each of these things are like separate texts. So she first writes you are the breeze in the desert for me, then then another space she probably waited. I love to see the time stamps on these. I feel like it's all together, like a poem almost my water and ocean. But what is the last one meant to be? Meant to be? To get together? Only together. This bitch cannot write though he writes like a computer like an astro. Yeah she really does. There's no comma like and I mean this that is the perfect response to this, because what the fuck is any of that? Even like I like that this was his last straw, like he was just poor. This woman, who just like is a robot, is like trying to It's like she's a bot that was taught to like write a poem bot kind of love on the spectrum mish yeah, yeah, and which she might be a little spectrum me. I could see that. Yeah, she's there's no doubt that she's brilliant. And she just used her brilliance for kind of evil and I think she probably thinks she didn't. She's not wrong. What she really was trying to do a great I know, because she's scared of udd and needles and and yeah, and just making it affordable for because blood tests are like nine million dollars. No. But it's like when you you know, are running for class president, You're like we're gonna have vending machines in every classroom and guess what, we're gonna have recess three times a day and no more Jim unless you want to. Like, politicians do that all the time and they get away with it. Yeah, I know so, But when a woman does it, yeah, it seems a little bit. That is the fascination behind her. I doubt that would be quite a story unless she was a woman, which I'm not saying like it's only because she's a woman that we're prosecuting her, But like, I don't think there would have been a documentary made. Speaking of documentaries as a new Britney series, I love the name of it, very smart. It's a great name. And there two more because her name is Versus. Did you know that? Yeah, it's French for alligator. I thought it was Brittany Victoria's secret spears alligator she's from. Yeah, she's from a slide Dell. I think, all right, Well, let's get to our our wild Cards segment wild Guard Wednesday. What's it going to be this week? It's we're playing the blankest thing, and this week's blankest is hornyest, the horniest thing we've ever done. Andrew, this was your brain child yeah, um, I would say the horniest thing I ever did. It was based off horny and love, so I guess, but I, well, there's two and it's over my girlfriend in college. One time I was drinking in New Orleans and I on horns and love. But alcohol did not play a part in it. But yeah, horny is love and alcohol which is wasn't answering my text? Your boy was horned up? Also very jealous. I drove and I my tire popped and I kept driving over to her place with sparks coming from my wheel, drunk like a fucking idiot. And uh, just because your boy was horned up? Well, and I probably couldn't even gone hard because I was so drunk. I know it sounds bad to say that I was drinking and driving, but you know, it's New Orleans. Everyone. If you're not drunk, you're not driving. That's what they say. That's a bumper sticker actually that no one can read because they're drunk. But uh, you know, there's drive through Dakari stands in New Orleans. It's insane and it's not. It's not. It's not unless you put the straw in, like as long as you keep the straw out because you can't possibly drink it. I would spill all over and and drunks don't like to spill. And then the other time is when I drove for the same girl. Remember I drove an hour and twenty minutes to her parents. That to me was the horniest thing you've ever done. I mean, you've done a lot of horny things. I guess this is more desperate than horny. But and I drove and and she lived in a private development, and I showed up and you could almost hear the disdain from just the the guy at the eight being like, you're making the wrong decision turned back, and I was like, it's not like they had like a private development. Like even that guy was like I could tell by her voice like she doesn't want this. And I show up and I knock. I'm like I'm here, like it's the notebook, and she's like, why don't you? How far did you drive? Just like like an hour forty five minutes? And her parents were there, right, yeah, and you would like makes it way worse. And she definitely was like, oh god, why is he here? Like that probably said all that stuff before you like actually pulled up to the house when you were at the gate and I was hammered and I had no tires, so it was weird. No, no, no, it was It was bad. It was bad, and I just remember how awkward she let me in, and I was just like, oh, this isn't going You ever do like a romantic gesture and it's just like, once it backfires, you should leave. I should have left, but I drove so far that it would have been almost weird. Weird, get back and see the night, Yeah, work out. Did she get back together with you? Not that night, but I think we got back together after that. We probably broke up and got back together maybe ten times throughout. Yeah. Why what's your horny move? I mean probably just I only get horny like when I'm having sex. Like there's been times in morning before having sex, but it's because it's like I know he's coming over or something, so then I don't really have to do anything. I don't get horny before sex is imminent. Driven through. Have you ever driven through to night to have sex or like done anything. I mean I've definitely, But that to me isn't horny. That there's I think of all the things I've done for guys that have been embarrassing. And it wasn't about me wanting to dick inside me and I want to come so bad. It was about I want a boyfriend so better. I want this guy that doesn't love me and never will to. I want the impossible. Um, but I think the horniest thing I've ever done was I mean, I've done disgusting thing because that's just like fun. But I guess, um, like, I mean, do you want me to tell you don first? Yeah? Please, because I'm just trying to pick which one I want to say. This is like I have never this is one of my deepest, darkest secrets and it's the only thing that came to my head. So I used to be like super like I used to watch a lot of porn. I used to masturbate all the time. I was like it was kind of a problem, and I was very, very horny. This is like, I mean, I started watching porn like when I was eight, and I started masturbating when I was very young. But this is like in my twenties and um, okay, so I didn't have or like I think my my dildo, like I just like used it too much. I was sick of it, but I was so horny and the thing that I found to use that, I was just like, Okay, I gotta see what this feels like. I was about to take pole dancing a lot since, and I had ordered a pair of blue side heels that were like like um like stacked blue side balls. Like they almost look like anal beads. Yes, like balls exactly, so it kind of looked like an a heel to yourself. And I was just like, Okay, I'm like really attracted to this. He'll like, I really want to see what this feels like. And that is the horniest thing I've ever done in them after you washed them off? Yeah, I mean I wore them to class. Oh my, and you too, class? Yeah I did. That's horny too. That that is like how people end up in the e R. This girl has a size seven pump insider. It's like, what so true? That's awesome? Not that is awesome. I guess me. Fucking jets as a kid is more horny than Yeah, like the weird things like you have sex with ya. I mean I what was the weirdest thing you put inside of your puss? Oh my god? I mean I would say a gummy worm. But that was like that wasn't a horny nous. That was a joke, but that was out of me just trying to be like like I was horny for like doing weird stuff. I mean, like I think I've just like done you know what. That's what I talk about on stage, Like I love being horny because it's like the only way I can feel drunk anymore, because when you get horny, you just do dumb stuff, like like we're talking about, Like I don't drink anymore, so I can't get to that point where I feel like I'm I can do crazy stuff that I can be like I was drunk, but like if I get like turned on enough, I'm just like you know, I'll tell sometimes I'll you know, be fooling around and be like if if you had friends waiting outside this door, I would a percent let you let random people come in here and and fuck me. But then when I'm when I'm not horn and the idea of that happening because I've always said to like the person that I had sometimes fool around with, like yes, we talk about gang bangs and stuff like that, Please never just know that, Like I need to ask I need to demand it, and it has to be you need to make me come like a million, like at least three times before I'm even entertaining that like idea, So you might book a gang bang and that might not happen because it's you got to let these guys know if this ever happened, Like it's not gonna happen, but if yes, yeah, Like something overcomes me and I'm just like and then I just start saying things that are like truly absurd that I can't that I don't when I get out of it, I'm like, oh my god, no, I'm like a proper woman that would never do that. So I've said some things in my horny state that I like, I have felt very like, hey, can we talk about what I said? Like I don't really want you to do that, right, And I'm like, but kind of like, if I ever get to that point again, I actually did one in that moment, I'd be okay with it. But like, That's why I'm so impressed by pornss that can agree to these crazy things. I know they're doing it for a job, but even like people that in the king community can agree to these wild kind of kinky things that at some point they had to do for the first time. Like maybe after you've done it a while, it's not so scary, but like the first time walking into a dungeon when you get out of your prius and you're like your and you're like, are like, you know, checking your phone like that. I am not in the mood to do that, but as soon as I get horned up, I'm going to be. But men I feel I can, oh that can get that horny before they enter, Like to get that horny for me, I need a lot of four play well. I guess you could equated to uh, getting on stage and making people laugh when you're in a very sad state and then once you get on stage, you make it happen. So maybe you could get a gang bang during the day when you're not horny. You just have to go Yeah, I just have to like know what to do to get myself to that place, but I also should always That's what I like about the you know, people who are really open sexually in the king community, is that there are good boundaries so that if someone is booked for a gang bang and you're just like, I'm not feeling it, they're not gonna go, well, I have to CON's all these like it's if you're not feeling then it's not happening like it's it's people can change their mind at any time. Go to my son's recital for this. And I feel oftentimes when you're with guys and you agree to do something sexually or you've talked about like, oh my god, like you're let's say you're in a long distance thing, you've never met the person, and you're like having phone sex and you're like, God, when I meet you, I'm gonna like fucking blow you and we're gonna funck. And then you're you finally meet up and you're like, I don't want to do that, but I already promised him, and so then you do the things. I mean, I've been in that situation before in long distance things where then when we finally meet and I'm like, I said I was going to do a lot of stuff, and now I feel like I have to do it. But the truth is, you never have happened so much with how much dating online, especially during COVID, like and the things you say in texts, Yeah, when you're actually horny, like the thing you could text someone when you're extremely horny, like you have a great tips for girls to send to their guy. If you ever have a guy that talks about you being with another woman and you're kind of like, I don't know about that, find a full length mirror and take take a picture and make sure one side of your head is like a different hairstyle than this side that's going to be reflected in the mirror. Put your boob up with the reflection boob naked, and it looks like you're pressing boobs with someone who looks a lot like you but has longer hair. And then you can't see if you take it like this, you can't see it looks like I have. It looks like it had a ponytail, right, so from this angle, it looked like Nikki was with a girl the reflection was this and had long hair, so it looked like I was with a girl with long hair. I had a ponytail that looks like me and we were about to make out. I sent it to someone and he was like, I dropped my phone. I literally thought you were with another girl. It took me like three seconds to process what I was seeing, and he was like it was the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life. And it was just me board in my hotel room being like, what can what kind of picture can I take? And I was able to really it even looked like it to me. It made me go, oh, this actually would be kind of a cool thing. I should do that in like shave half my beard and be like, honestly, that's you could do it. It's really it's a fun little trick. And I swear to god, I never would have thought it looked so convincing. But you gotta keep wiping down the mirror so you don't fog up your twins image. Final thought, I think like so many yeah, like you were saying, like, so many guys get in trouble because they text when they're insanely horny. So when you see a text like I want to eat your butthole and your skin and all this, and I've been so tricked by that, where guys like to promise you a lot of things when they're so horny or they're on ambient and then or they're drunk, and then you are left to believe that, yeah, maybe this person misspelled a couple of things, but maybe they're like Elizabeth Holmes, and they just really think I'm the breeze of the desert and Tiger be together forever. Tiger. No, But that person in that mindset is the same as when you're horned up and asking for a gang bang. That's the same mindset. So you gotta be able to know. I know that now, but before when it's just via text and the person isn't telling me like I think they're at work because it's during the day and they're saying because sometimes guys will not just say horny things. They'll say like really like loving things because maybe that's what they get, like when they're horny, they get really like I want to fucking hold your hand and go look at birds in the park with you, and like I want to go shop, Like I've had guys like talk about relationships, but they're just horny. Yeah, I think I think they're either. And there's gonna be a text that maybe a different colored text when a guy still hasn't If the guy's texts the green bubble, you go, I can't date you because you have an Android and also you're you're warned up or like some kind of emoji that a guy has to right before to let you know where his brains at. What you already comprobably is they're not going to do that because when you're drunk or horny, you don't really you're you're so stupid you don't even know to tell someone that you are. You know, like Chris Rockvid, he's like, I got caught with porn by my wife and he's like, you know where the video was in the VCR. Like I mean, obviously that shows how old that joke is, but like that's he that's where your brain is. It's not here. You're in another world. Men when they get horny are so fucking stupid. It's like it really is. There's like a I love it though. It makes them so vulnerable and cute to me, Like there's there's something that makes Yeah, I mean, that's where women can actually take back some of the power is just making sure men are horny and then we can kind of trick them into just you know, putting driving their yards is down an embankment because you you know, like there's like whatever the story the other day that couple that was fucking they car but they were just horny and not thinking straight because you just don't and they bought a yrs. Yeah, that's how they get you. Yeah, there's just um, I don't know. It's but the things I'm able to do in bed, like sexually, that I never thought i'd be able to do um and like even you know, my exploration of other holes has all been based upon the fact that I was horny enough to go, Okay, let's do something wild. That's like, well, what are we doing? And it's like, oh, well, actually that felt really good. Let's do that again next time. We get that horny. But it's really fun sometimes when you get super corned up and you just do something that you both are like, oh, should we talking about it? I love that that that paragraph It just sounds like how someone found America. They're like like like like you know what I mean, Like how you sound like how I found new holes. I took a chance and I yeah, because you just get stupid, you get brave, you get liquid courage, you get like juiced up down there, and then you get that going to give you a bunch of gold. Yeah you get that. Yeah, you get um, Yeah, you get in't You'll just go to so many extreme lengths. And sometimes when you do extreme things, Obviously, being horny has led people to make bad decisions that have led to pregnancies and diseases. And where a guy riding a BMX bike and doing three flips because the girls in the crowd and he has and he wants to get laid, or like a guy rubbing his engine and like plowing through an intersection and killing a family of four, Like that's because a guy was like either his balls were full and he was just like angry he couldn't calm, or like he was on his way to go funx somewhe like. So much destruction has been caused by guys being horny, But I think that there probably has inspired people to take chances they didn't think that they would take, probably with his horny. And that's what I mean, like a thousand inventions like d M people that I was like, why would you think that that person? Like I've taken risks in terms of that of like or just I mean, I guess I haven't taken career risks in horny nous, but outfit choices sometimes I'm like I feel like kind of slutty, I'll wear this that's funny, Yeah, because that's why. Yeah, that's so true, like playing new sports. Whenever you asked me to play golf, I'm like, no, I'm not trying to funk you. I would never go play golf with you, but I think it. Yeah, No, I mean, I'm sure I would enjoy it. But again this, I sure you would enjoy Bachelor in Paradise, But there's other things you'd rather watch. There's other things you could hit nine balls. I mean I've watched to other guys and yeah, exactly. I mean it was a little meat market down there. I cannot believe how many hot guys were there, just like hitting balls into the night because they're horny. Do you think of that the guys, or do you play golf better when you're horny or do you need to have your I guess I could equate horny niftosso if I drink too much caffeine. It's kind of a similar feeling. But why do you guys save their stock if they're like, you know, before a game, like they don't want to come. They gives it because it gives because it inspires them. That's why some like athletes do not come because they're like, it gives me motivation to want to be better and do things. Yeah, huh, it all comes back around. It's like being quiet for like people that do to the silent retreats, so then when you can talk, it's like that much better. I don't think that's why they do it, but I do think that's the thing. But I don't think they go, oh, I can't wait till it's fun to talk. It was a good show. It was was it? Do you have to say it's a good show? If it was a good show, guys will see you tomorrow. Don't be cut there and g