The Kyle & Jackie O ShowThe Kyle & Jackie O Show

FULL SHOW: Hey Pam, Aunty Jill, Uncle Bruce, gardener Jorge & nanny Sam

View descriptionShare
Published Aug 14, 2024, 1:05 AM

ON THE SHOW TODAY:

  • Tradie V Lady
  • First Calls
  • Birthday Wheel
  • O News
  • Pop Quiz
  • Confession Booth
  • What's Colleen Watching?
  • O News
  • Peter Files
  • Last Calls

Follow us on @kyleandjackieo for more!

Kyle Jacky Jackie, The Kyle and Jackie Show. Hi everyone, morning, Wednesday, Wednesday, indeed, humpday.

Hey quick check of the staff. One down again to the old crow. This bitch is almost done.

I think she's got COVID now, I mean, what more does the universe want to do to this girl?

She's got two broken feet, a broken heart, and now out of shape.

Now, if you're listening here, we love you.

She needs to get a headed No she doesn't.

He always looks amazing.

She's got other problems right now, Carl, Now, I know, I know.

Yeah, I'm just I'm just trying to let everyone know what the deal is.

Some mess.

I feel for her.

Don't worry.

It's regardless before dawn, right listen.

Stupid quote don't always work.

Well, it is, and so the light's coming. Don't worry.

She can't hear.

She'd be listening.

She's working from home.

No, she's got COVID. What's the COVID policy here at the moment? By because remember how if one person had COVID that bring in the people in the hazmat suits with the spraying machines.

And COVID policy just get over it.

I think.

I'll tell you the official one is if you feel super rotten, then stay away. If you feel good, then you can come in.

Okay.

So it's like any other cold like.

It always should have been. Look at Pedro, all sitting over there, unvaccinated, nodding, Pedro, we know you didn't get the needle.

Bro well, right?

He serious?

I don't think he was right, but he wasn't wrong. He wasn't wrong either. Would Jackie's got to be announcement to I wonder if this COVID thing will be covered in your announcement. No, go, make your announcement clear, Clear the air, Clear the air. A special announcement from Jackie. O.

Yes, I'm bringing out my own book.

Book. Oh my god, the pictures.

There's pictures.

Yeah, nude, there's no nude pictures in what's.

The book called?

It's called the Whole Truth?

So it's about your.

Whole No, it's w h O l E, not h O l E.

Although section, what do you mean the whole truth? What do we get in some half hour truth?

You get the truth, You just don't get the whole truth. The detail, the detail that suits me, because.

A lot of that sounds like ship women would like, what do you mean.

You'll like it?

Actually you will, Like what are you talking about? There's everything in there car masturbating, not masturbating, I don't think I talk about that.

Talking about what's the truth. We don't know that'll be in this way. Just give us a little little little taste something something.

We're a lot. There's just a lot, and I wouldn't even know where to start, Like there's a there's there's things in there that like I've never talked about because I just haven't felt like I am ready to talk about it.

And then there's no no and marriage past marriages.

Well obviously I go into that. That's not you know, it's just a lot of things. And then there's also there's things in their car, and I know you'll love all the all the things you've wanted to know.

Are in there now as playing well just.

About like yeah, there's yes, I did not say there, I said all.

The stuff is in there, of that, all of it.

Yeah, yeah, it's actually.

Tuned into one of those people that go, you'll have to read the book.

Oh my god, I am going to be one of those peop was the point. No, but when it's before right before it's out, Like I totally touched on all that. I won't be like read the book, but.

That was a hint.

Yeah, questions for me If that's okay, I've got three questions.

What is your question?

Wins the book out by the way, October twenty nine.

I write that down every October twenty.

Twenty nine in the diary Jackie. Will there be the peanut story discussed?

Yes, yes, gets discussed.

It's only ever been discussed once on the air and the government went beliss.

Well and not allowed. It's a code break. I've got multiple copies for.

My hold in front of the tribunal. It wasn't even my story.

Yeah no, let's let's not.

Will there but like Kyle did a meet and greet it like a Westfield and book signing.

That so I guess I haven't discussed that with Penguin, That's who I'm doing it with.

Amazing And most importantly, will the staff get a free copy and be able to sign?

Oh? Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah, I'll pay.

Why would you let them have free because my friends they're not your friends.

Get people to pay for my book?

Your staff?

Well, you know, am I mentioned in the book.

That doesn't look good. I'm sorry, Peter, I don't think you are. Would it was so much I had to talk about that.

I just there wasn't anything there.

Was more significant.

There was more interesting stuff than.

There were There were way bigger things.

Not even like even in the draft that got the cull that we can later.

No, I don't.

I don't think so.

No one thought of you, am I mentioned?

Of course, Kyle, you were mentioned.

Like that would be outrageous. That would be the failure of the book if I wasn't. Is there a photo of me in it?

Yeah?

I haven't approved any photos.

Oh, I can show you right now obviously.

Are you still using my boyfriend's photo on the back cover?

Yeah, yeah, Well so Damien took some beautiful photos, and I'm using one of his photos for the back cover.

I'm not a photo.

Do I see the cover of Jackie?

The color that's lovely?

Yeah, that's nice, Jackie.

You could have put a bit more bosom in it.

No, there is no You've got to capture man's when there's lonely businessmen traveling on the you know, interstate, they're lonely, they're away from their family, they're they're standing around the bookshop at the airport.

A bosom will catch a man's eye. You don't understand marketing.

It does remind me of like a Mills and Boon covers.

You can go to our Instagram page to check it out if you want to see it with put it up there in.

Case, yeah, because no one can.

Also, young Alfie wanted to get on and ask some questions not related to your book. But Alfie's at the Afters, which is the Australian Film and Television Yeah, that's.

Right, because.

You were there.

What were you doing there?

One class?

Okay, yeah, And a student brought up saying that we don't introduce a lot of women characters on the show.

And I thought that's wrong because we have like so many women here.

So what did they say?

What are you saying? What did she say?

She's saying that we don't bring up enough women on the show. Like she even said to me, like when you got your breast check, she said, why didn't the other staff get their breast check too?

Event that's right, we're not a pornographic Kisses coming in again. Yeah, it can do everyone.

And she said she's what Alfie told me this morning. She knew all the male staff by name and rattled them off.

She started naming Bruno ped intern Fiel.

This is a bad morning for you got Pete's name wrong.

No wonder you're not in the book, bro. The listeners don't.

Even know radio school like that means she loves radio.

By not getting cut through at the moment, you're clearly not.

You know why, because you coast along in life doing barely anything, and when you do do something, it's always a disappointment.

Well, not today, not today. I've got a segment in peak listing time for it's.

A Pedophiles exclusive.

So I've got multiple cases on the go and this one is huge.

Right, the Pedophiles is back, so he's off. Phil welcome.

So Alphy, you took the woman to task.

Yeah, that's right, because she even brought up Brooklyn, because Brooklyn.

Was that afters to yesterday, taught a lesson what's yeah about news?

Why did you get paid?

Yeah? How much?

It's not that much, but March it's a few hundred dollars.

A few hundred dollars. If it fell out of my pocket, I'd keep walking, sitting around, going to teach a bunch of kids. You know, I was going to show. They had an open day at the afters thing. I saw an ad for it, yeah, and I thought maybe I'll just show up. But I think that was last Saturday. I forgot.

Yeah, that's right, last Saturday was open day.

Oh that's going They're going to have very high expectations. Then if they just see you wandering around.

I wouldn't wonder around. I drive the Rolls Royce straight in the middle and open up and go who wants to have the next greatest gig in the radio? That all come clucking around? You know what?

And then what would you do? Would you win part words of wisdom?

Would you?

Probably not?

So I don't want people to do well in my industry.

You know what, want people to do well in any industry.

That's not true. I think you work hard. You read the rewards. So when will you finish the Radio Academy this year?

Hopefully get it all done then I can focus on the show.

Yeah, yeah, it's great.

I love it.

And who's the woman that I never went to radio school, no.

Checking into the old fashioned way.

You'll read about that in the book. I never wanted to be in radio. Actually I had no desire. She thought, no because my best friend and I she wanted to be in radio.

I wanted to be like a.

Movie star, and then she became the TV star and I got in radio. Was Lisa Lisa Barry? You don't know. I talked about her recently she ended up on the Disney Channel.

Poor Things on Saturday Disney. Yeah, like a Saturday Disney Things. Do you remember her?

I remember the name.

With a lot of Lisa's around Brook, Tell me what you think of this? A woman's gone viral. My wife noticed this after revealing what turns her on the most about men eating.

I don't think. Okay, I'll tell you what.

One of my turn ons is.

I've never said this out loud. If a man can like eat like the.

Way he eats, if he like gets a fat burrito.

And he just man handles it, I'm like, you can manhandle me into like That's where my mind goes.

Isn't that weird? Do you girls really watch men eat?

No?

Maybe I'll ask someone who's maybe out there looking for sex rather than waiting for to show up at girls? Do you like watching men eat? Does that turn you on?

Hey, it's the meg here.

I love watching my husband eat a steak.

Honestly, it's so sexy, like when they.

Get in there, even a t bone steaks and they like suck on it on the bone steak. A BJ day would be easy because you're getting turned on already. I know.

That's I'm probably the creator of it because I love it.

Yeah, that's it probably started with you, your patients. Zero I've given b I love it.

Oh my god, it's my favorite thing. Is How about you all the same sisters?

Where are you?

Yeah?

You Jackie?

What about the rest of you girls? You going the gobble on the regular?

What? Yeah?

I like it?

You like it through there's the school teacher. What about the censor desk up there? They're very quiet up on the censor desk.

Oh you know, when I can get it slash, when I can be bothered?

Yeah, oh god, she's one of those nasty types. What just hovering around it? But you never get it? What about the Ukrainian You never hear from her?

No, she doesn't like to talk.

I'm on the radio. I translate her. You said, don't trust Russian Pete to translate the.

Ukraine sabotage quite a lot, quite a lot, quite a lot. She's all I got out of that. She likes it quite a lot, a lot or something about it.

Yes, what about you gay guys? Do you do you you on that on the pole a lot? Or are you getting it done?

Probably? Probably were getting it done.

Yeah, that's the man.

You really are the king in your relationship, aren't you.

I picture Brooklyn hands on hips just looking down nodding like, yeah.

Cole, ask you when you eat a banana? Are you like you try to hide it and I'm not like.

You, Colin bra he leans into it and actually gives it a.

Beach and Bruno eats a banana. Tell Jackie how you eat a banana in front of a minute. It's really weird?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Because like I don't want people thinking, you know, like I'm the wrong thing there. So I'll get the banana and I'll just break off sections.

Where I will lean in.

I'll put that a whole banana down my throat and then slowly slide out and then bite a little bit off. Just to make you feel uncomfortable, I just popped up a photo.

Of you a good dog at the Easter Show. Cal I think anything phallic you love to look like you're giving it.

Yeah, I don't care, and I'll do it for lolls. Pedro will not even eat an ice block like that. You'll lean everything from the side. Yeah, I'll chop from the side. What a weirdo.

I make?

I think you you want to suck dick. That's why I'll tell you what happened.

Remember Snappy Tom here, Every time I eat a banana, he'd give me like the eyes on purpose, and he just turned me off. I never since sand on his sky.

Really, it's so easily rattled. You guys should go and work at the ABC where all the other easily rattled people work. Did you see that poor weather guy had a panic attack?

Oh you know, I heard about this, but I haven't seen it yet. Wrong job, bro, Oh no, no, I will tell me what happened.

You can't panic attacks. People haven't They don't even know what how they I don't get them.

I don't know if I've had them.

What do you get them from?

I used to get them. I don't get them anymore, thank God. Well, actually it's the whole reason I don't do drugs, because it happened off the back of drugs, and I just got to.

This story from I got it the whole truth.

Yeah, yeah, yeah it is.

And I got him for like a year or two and I never said anything. It's like a panic a panic attack. I don't I didn't get them severely like other people can get them where you literally are like think you're going to die that.

They're quite quite overbearing.

Right, Yeah, they're they're actually.

Did get it? What drugs did you have?

I just remember I had that acid trip and weed on the same day. No, no, I was on the Gold Coast, Yeah, I remember, And from that it just spiraled and.

The lasted two years.

Wow, what's that dealer's number? Because that.

Trust me.

And half done. Listen to this guy on the ABC. He covered it quite well. But I'm saying, if you do have panic attacks, some jobs you just shouldn't do. One flying planes, two being on TV.

Well, Carrie bit Moore did it for years and she's revealed she had panic attacks as well all the time during her rove years and she has worked through it. But you can do it. It's just realize and is it worth the torture for yourself to hear.

This young fella. I think he covered it pretty well. I feel for him a little bit, But there's a lot of jobs that you just you know, it be hard to work around. I don't even know what this feelings like. I suppose I'm a big soldier and I don't.

Get Anyone can get a panic attack, and they can come on later in life. Like you know, I've got a friend that happened to him out of nowhere. He just started getting them.

He must be hiding something in life.

I don't know.

Actually I'm not sure.

I don't get panicked.

Listen to this bloke, poor bloke, only see lots more rain in the days ahead. I'm actually going to need to stop for a second. Some of you may know that I occasionally get affected by some panic attacks, and actually that's happening right now, Lisa, maybe I could hand back to you.

Oh bless him, the poor thing. Oh that breaks my heart.

You never saw this in the old days, never saw any of Ray Martin or any of these people having You just never saw it. People were scared to bring it up.

Yeah, and that's so true.

Is affected by panic attacks not me?

No, because I have never even heard of panic attacks before. Like we've gone from Uruguay and this doesn't exist in Uruguay. Like we're too worried about whether we can afford a slice of cheese.

And you're right, how.

About somebody else been in the.

Past our censor.

Of course, it's missy and and happen when you get panicked about.

It started at Uni.

I got lumped with a bunch of no hopers on a group project.

Don't you sound encouraging a bunch of no hopers.

Anyway, I started having vertigo. I thought I was going to pass out or I was going to die. It's it's really scary when it does happen, and it can just happen for no reason.

Bruno, you look like someone that would also get panic attacks, because you're all he's in and out of the mental homes, and you're a real you're a real nut job, right.

Yeah.

I've got to say, I think I've only ever had a panic attack once, and it was when I was in a hospital in Brisbane and I kicked.

Down mental mental ah yeah, mental hospital, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I was I was running away and then I got caught and then I had a panic attack.

But that was the only time. You sure you just didn't get angry that you got caught.

Oh yeah, maybe it was that then, Yeah, so no, maybe I haven't had a panic attack.

Sorry for I'm wasting your time.

What about it the out in the football world, Cooper athletes having panic attacks tech, he said, anyone can get it.

Yeah, I think like the pressure of you know, performing and external pressure of like media and fans and whatnot.

People have panic attacks all the time in the sporting world, do they. Yeah, I've had a few.

Yeah, yeah, yeah because of the four games, like after games and whatnot.

You got because of all the attention from the female fans.

No, No, like a media like pressure like bag and bagging you have for playing bad or whatever.

You guys need to toughen up.

But it's not you guys. Just think what it is is like, oh, this is stressing me out and I'm panicked it it's something that just feels uncontrollable.

Some feeling comes over you.

Yeah, that triggers these things inside that feel so awful.

It's really hard to explain.

But yeah, it's not just like, oh, you're weak minded, you know, tough enough. I don't. I don't believe it's just as simple as that. So I really feel for anyone.

Who you have their medical skill to say that.

I don't actually, but I can only speak from experience, that's all, which is more than most of you.

Well, let's hope that people like Quantus and places like that they've got a more strict screening process, because I don't want a couple of pilots panicking.

Well, you've always got your co pilot, that's what they're there for.

What if they've also got what if the pilot panicking clicks.

The copilot like panicking.

We can't just let everyone do everything they want at the danger ever. You know, sure the weather guy isn't going to kill anyone for having the panic attack. No, but you don't want all the Quantus pilots having no, No.

That's true. Yeah, all right, let's do trading versus lady guys.

What is on offer?

It's an ASA tablet thanks to ASA, a global leader in technology. We're looking for a trade and a lady.

We're in front.

They are in front. Finally, fifty eight points to fifty seven. Come on, girls, we need to win this one. I need a good I need a good lady who knows trading stuff. Well, good luck, Are you a lady trady?

I take you?

Yeah, and we'll take a gay trading.

No, no, not gay trades. Don't know ladies ship they would?

What would you know?

And I have a circular sawt.

Okay, you want to try Trady trading one lady thirteen one O six y five and we'll do it next. This is the Carl and Jackie Oshow and Chis or Russell.

Ladies and jobs.

I want to start.

Say, wakey, wakey everyone in Melbourne today be cloudy tops of twenty one degrees, rain rain, rain in Sydney tops of eighteen For.

You guys, okay, let me introduce you to Courtney playing for the ladies. She's a teacher.

Hey, good morning, Hey, heyod morning guys.

Hallo, you are up early. Are you getting ready for a day of teaching?

Yavil Carl, you very early. You can relate to this having two kids. Got to get up and do my morning gym workout before I come home on.

Maternity and starting back tomorrow.

Fantastic. Are you feeling good? Everything sortied?

No, I've got all the fields at the moment, happy dad and everything in between.

You're going to leave the little baby at home for the first time.

Yeah, flucky, it's good morning, daddy.

I love so Her favorite sexposition is reverse cowgirl. She is a massive home and away fan and would drive to Palm Beach every weekend to try to spot the stars and be in the background.

Did you ever make it so cool?

No?

Rejected every time, rejected.

I know.

I've even driven out to bet cart Wright and Laton hear It Tows just to see what.

It looked like and away from it. But so was it back in the day when it was like Bet Cartwright, Tam and Sir Sock, all those people on there.

Yes, absolutely, you know Bo Brady.

Yes, I forgot about Bo Brady. I wonder what he's doing these days. It was two pippers.

Remember there was a fat one the thin one.

Yeah, well they started out with that and then she decided I don't want to do this anymore. But they needed Pipper. She was the central figure, wasn't she.

If you replace a character, you can't bring in big Bertha to replace it.

They can do whatever. They do it on Bold and the Beautiful all the time.

And I don't like it either. I don't like it all right.

Weighing in at sixty seven kilos, you know we don't belong together.

We're gonna.

Bruno, Bruno, can you just I know you're busy out there, could you please ring the headed Channel seven and just arranged for Courtney to appear as an extra in the background of one home and away scene and you for me, please, Bruno, just make it happen. Say I need it to happen. We need Totney will make that happen for you.

Hey, the dream comes my day just.

Like a genie. Just make women's I just make women's days. Matia is on for the fella. What's up? Yeah?

Were good?

He's a sparky and electrician the top tier of trade's they say, or is a plumber?

No no, no, no no no. If you're sparky at the top ki, Yeah.

You've gotta have a brainer be Oh, I see there's death.

If you make a mistake, you're dead.

It is training involved with the sparky.

Oh yeah, yeah.

I mean it's the same, same years and taste. But you know, you've got to be You've got to be supreme. You've got to be elite to be a sparky.

Think of this. They both get paid very well, plumbers and sparky. But if you've got your hand up to your elbow down someone's toilet pulling out clogged tampons.

That's one and then one and the sparky's come in and they just have to go to the power box and change a light.

Yeah, you are the smart ones.

Actually.

Yeah.

Drives around the hold in Colorado, so things mustn't be too top of town yet. He's been with his chick for two months. Things going real well. His favorite exposition is missionary. He's currently addicted to phone sex, having it on and off all day with you.

I'm telling you, Kyle, I'm telling you it is hard when she lives on the other side of the world. Well, she bro she's in Italy. She's from my homeland.

Oh wait a minute, you've seen each other for two months, but how how many times have you seen her?

So I was I've just recently come back from Europe. I was there for six weeks.

Yeah, you met up over there.

So so she was a family friend because I was born there. I moved here in twenty fifteen, so I've known her for years. But yeah, no, she we got back in contact, spent six weeks together and I was like, you know what, you know, might as.

Well date it.

What what kind of plans do you guys have though? To be together. You're going to go over there? Or is she going to move?

That's a good question. Now we're mistaken it one day at a time.

But I've never been good at phone sex and never I can't do it. I've tried. I'm no good.

I can't say I was either until about about eight weeks ago.

What do you say?

What do you I can't come up with this like give us, give us a g rate it or at least you know, rated on time.

Just sometimes it's just you know, you're in the mood and you just go, you know, how is your day? Blah blah blah, and then the clothes are coming off and then you just pretend you're there, do everything you do.

You don't know.

He has to say it.

You're just jerking off while she's on the phone. You're not doing any romance talk.

Oh of course, you know, jerking off you're talking romance and seeing.

I don't do a lot of talking during the sex either. So for me to talk whilst it's.

All right, I reckon it could be good.

Yeah, I'm flat out getting a backwards and Ford's conversation with my wife on the couch in person little alone phone sense I'm talking talking. She's like looking at the phone.

You're surrounded by women who do that. You get it.

Yeah, you're the same everyone. I can't stand it anyway. Moving on with him weighing in it's sixty kilos.

It's the Italian stallion, Matia.

Are you ready, mate, I'll start with you.

Good luck man.

In a pedicure. What's the purpose of applying cuticle oil.

To make the small clear, to make the small clip?

Is that what he's about to make the nails more clear?

To make the nails more clear? Is that, Jack?

No, it's actually just to soften the cuticles.

Which with the cuticles that the skin that growst skin. Yeah, that grows on the nail.

That's right.

You don't like that bit, jack?

Oh No, Black Swan, I've got PTSD from watching that.

I have no idea.

What is like Natalie attack Now?

I feel like it's coming on the Natalie Portman movie where she played the swan.

In Swan, like the feathers grow out of it or something.

Well, yeah, but she starts going on.

It's got like this nervous thing where she peels the cuticles.

Off her nails.

Wow, I don't like those Asian ladies. You know, they're all in a shop or bitching about us with those little sticks, those.

Sticks and then make the cuticle sticks.

They're not very they're not very careful.

No, okay, matteya. Question number two? What does the super swipe feature.

Do on bumble?

Super swipe? I guess? Would you can swipe like more than one person on more.

Than one at a time.

Super The super swipe sends a special notification to someone you're interested, that you're extra interested desperate thing? Is it bumble?

Yeah? I don't know, Jackie to use bumble?

I have done?

Who who uses it?

Said?

Who uses? Have you never been on a Oh?

Yeah, I don't do dating, as you know, exactly right?

Who is your number?

Three?

What is a smudge brush?

Commonly you for?

Oh, I know this one to smudge your Is it not concealer?

What's it called?

Blush?

Blust smudge the blush.

To smudge the bluff.

No, no, it's not it it's I know, but it's actually for the eyeliner and smoky eye effects.

The pencils.

No, but then you've got.

The brush to smudge it because you use the pencil and then you've.

Got a smudget.

We don't know how so many mattea, so many beyond.

But you got nothing. But that doesn't mean you've lost. You can still win. Come on, stand by the background, courtiney you ready? Okay, Court, you need one point to win?

All right, let's do it.

No stress, don't panic. Question one, what's the purpose of a lack of seala.

Yet?

Oil?

Lacailla is to oil it. So if you're doing a board, it makes it all shiny and smooth on top.

Wrong, it's to stop lacquer being absorbed too quickly into the wood.

So you put that on thirst like an undercoat.

God, you sounded so legit.

I had I thought you had it.

I did too.

What's like oil.

In bricklaye? What is the bed joint? What's that.

Head joint?

Bed joint?

What is it like hoist where you can lift up the bed so that you get storage underneath?

No, oh, this is in brick lane. Remember bricklane. Oh you don't lay bricks and then lift them all up. Yeah, bricklaye. It's the horizontal layer of more so that they put down first, which then all the bricks are put on top of. Silly lady. Question three, what.

So patronizing to the women.

Listen to these words monument paper, bark and deep ocean. They are all types of what monument paper, bark, deep ocean?

Are they their colors?

Colors?

I know you can get monuments.

Oh my gosh, girls, unbelievable. He's done it.

It's a woman's world and we're lucky.

You got the as tablet as a global leader in technology.

Oh my god, I love that you knew that.

I never thought you'd get it.

Well, a lot of women you see down at the color charred walls who're looking very confused at tallments not Courtney No ways. Sorry, my friend, keep the six. I don't worry, bro, congratulate her. It's good that they get to win every now and then.

Every now you got to you got you gotta let them. Let him think we're winning all year.

By the way, guys, you for about two decades you've insisted on equality and you couldn't be you're still not happy. We're both equal, trades and ladies equal.

Yes, equality, and we're happy.

We've achieved it. Good luck getting the Homo section happening Brooklyn.

Jaggio and Jaggio show.

Cloudy twenty one the top for Melbourne if you're in Sydney raining all day, very gray skies right around the harbors of the eighteen.

It's been warmer in Melbourne like every day this week.

Yeah, I know, I know.

Electric mum has the electric blanket on. I haven't had an electric blanket for about forty years.

I don't sleep with an electric blanket, but I do have an electric throw on the couch.

It's the best electric throw.

Where does it plug is?

Listen to the top of the town here. Obviously she's probably got one of those.

You just have an extension card, I do.

You don't have one of those nice you know, like in a hotel where the powerpoints in the floor.

But I will be getting that. I will do that in the new place Bacon dream. Yeah, yeah, because I hate I hate running extension cords through a laundroom.

It looks so bad.

Well, you've got a lot of things to worry about in your life, haven't you.

Yeah, there's whether the electric.

Power chords on display or not. That's the song of someone who's really achieved in life.

Brett's called through for first calls.

Hi Brett, good.

Morning, morning, morning Jackie.

How are you so called for your first book?

You mate, that's what I am.

Yeah, I guess.

Big question. Are you bringing out an audiobook for the boys out there that lovely to your voice?

Yes, I am. Actually I have to go in and read that book all from cover to cover out loud.

I didn't do an audiobook for mine because I couldn't be bothered reading it.

Why don't you do what Britney did, Britney Spears, just get someone else to do it.

I found that side that Brittany got Michelle Williams of all people to read her book, because I just don't feel like those two were similar. It would be the same. I mean, who's the like, No, I definitely want to read it myself.

Are you going to put a little bit of you know, make it nice?

I think it'll just you know, it's funny because I've thought about that, like, how do you read your own book? Like?

Do you read it like you'd read anything, as.

Though you were you aren rating something? Or do you read it as though you're telling someone this?

I don't think you reading?

Yeah, would you want to add some extra bits in there?

This is another question? So are you an audio book fan? Brett? Like do you ever listen to audio books?

Yourself.

Yeah, yeah, and I think all the boys love it.

It would be falling sleep, your.

Voice, falling asleep.

And I don't know if I want you to fall asleep into.

My book if you really expect a lot, don't.

But yeah, I want to. I want to read it. Maybe I could add extra things in there, you know, like just side notes of like oh, by the way, you know it can add extra information.

About what colorant?

Yeah?

Maybe I don't know.

But will you read it and then go the end? By the way, I was wearing yellow pants? Was that the sort of thing you want? I wouldn't mind that. Yeah, is that what you want? Oh?

Yeah, absolutely, Actually it gets up but no, that's for sure.

Yeah. Well I'll definitely maybe go a bit rogue on the reading and add some extra things in. I got to say, though, when when you do a book, it's the amount of times you have to read the book. It's just I never read mine once. You didn't know what do you mean?

Still this down? I've never read it that.

I know you said that, but you because like, do you know, I reckon, I've read my book about six times so far. Because you go, you edit things and then you want to feel like, doesn't it flow? Does it work?

I made Bruno read it.

Out to me, Oh did you? Yeah?

Okay, remember when you'd read out my book, Bruno, you're writing it. I don't have a coughing fit, remember, I'd say, don't put that in?

Yeah. Yeah.

My favorite memories was kyl laying down in bed with the ashtray on his belly, and I'd be sitting on you know, like that sort of creepy chair in the corner of the room and reading him sort of what we had written, and he'd be like, yeah.

Mate, that sounds good. Do you like That's how we did it?

Yeah, and it was great.

How did you do it well?

I didn't bet you sat there with your glasses on in front of the laptop, typing away, but you.

Didn't have an ashtray on your belly. I didn't have an ashtray on my belly, and I didn't do it lying down.

Well, good luck for you to do it. You do it your own.

Way exactly, it'll do well.

Thank you.

We got caught. What's up?

Hi Court?

Hi guys.

You guys touched on panic attacks this morning, and I just want to share with you my game changer that are used for both me.

And my eight year old son.

Oh, so you have panic attacks and you you figured out like a cheat sheet to get around it.

Yeah, well, my son has.

Them too, and he was always embarrassed with them, so we came up with a cheat just so no one would notice we're doing it. So you basically hold one hand out and with the other pointer finger, you trace your hands around the outside of your hand. So going up one finger, you breathe in, and going up the other side you breathe out.

And so my son would do that.

Where do you So you put your hand out and you trace on the outside of the finger, breathing in.

Is it a breathing exercise? Isn't?

Yeah, it's a breathing exercise. So he doesn't utter his desk at school if he's having a panic or an anxiety attack, so no one notices he's doing it.

So let me, I don't know a lot about this shit. But is it like doing something where you are super focused on something and the breathing is controlled. Is that Does that capture it?

Yeah?

So he just focused. It's a way to focus on his breathing, So tracing his finger, he just purely focuses on his breathing that way.

Yeah, that's good. That's a good method.

Yeah, that's a very good method, and it worked for any game that works that. Thank you for the heads up there, Corn.

Now I appreciate no worries.

No worries.

There we go. So next time, Brooklyn you start panicking.

No, I'm too chill for that.

Oh you're too Panic's here, Peter, you're apanicer? Is it Peter time? No?

No, over to coops, Peters to that played footy, Yeah you got, you got, you got your head around it.

Well you knew you.

You probably had imposter syndrome where you knew I shouldn't be out here on the field. You were only there because of your family name. Really, you're like a nepo footballero baby.

Yeah, yeah, I got the tism nepotism.

Can you tell us, Cooper how much you made playing football?

Yeah? Since Brooklyn told us he only made a couple of hundred bucks teaching kids at radio school, I feel it's only fair, Like, was.

Your contract a big one?

How much we're pulling in there on the on the footy field coups?

Well that's probably I can let you know what the minimum wage for an Rrol player is, yeah.

Like a copy from Kyle Jackie. But that was low. That was very long.

That was unnecessary.

I think the minimum is about one hundred grand, yeah minimum.

Right, Yeah, that's pretty good. It's the minimum.

And let's face it, not a lot of works going on.

How many players in the team would be on that Cooper.

All of it?

Na, Well, they're like probably like seven out of the squad of thirty. You would probably hit the minimum and then the rest would kind of slowly go up and then the top player is about a million.

Oh, you would have been above the seven. Thanks Jackie.

Yeah, but you know where near the million? Was your father up on the top here there? Yeah, John's would have been big money, right Andrew.

Was how much do you reckon Andrew got paid? Was that reported? Was that well known?

I don't think so.

I think he.

Probably would have been at that time, like given the exchange rate and what not. Now, like what the dollar was back then there, Harry, Sorry, probably about a million.

Yeah, I would say.

Louise at school teacher, she's got some real facts.

I did a Google in two thousand and five.

It says he was earning five hundred thousand a season.

With Knights and Joey. Why is his name? Why do you call him Joey when his name's Andrew?

Good question, joe John's it's just like baby kangaroo, Joey.

Sit him in the pouch.

He's small.

That's a pretty ship name. You should have come out with something better.

We can work well. I call him horse. That's like our our family. We say horse, hey, horse.

Because in relation to his penis definitely not your grandfather's got the big penis.

Yeah, yeah, he's bigfoot.

Mitch is called in, Mitch, good morning, sir. Hell are we very well?

Mane? What can we do for you? I've got I need some help.

What do you need?

So?

Last year for Christmas, I got my missus h I thought, which was a pretty good present.

But what was it?

So it was just a cardboard box pretty much, and it was just a photo.

Of me perfect Mitch framed, framed, not framed nothing.

Well, that's all right, let her pick her own frame.

Yeah, I thought I'd give it a decency. But what's it called?

Gave it to her.

She goes, oh, what's this?

What's this?

And I go I opened it up?

She opened it up.

She hated it.

Honey, you need to really make good on last year.

That's what what did girls want from their boyfriend?

Jack?

How old are you?

Mitch?

Eighteen?

Where do you live?

Okay?

The Melbourne guy eighteen? Last birthday for the missus. She didn't like it a photo of himself.

Fine jewelry is always good, like find when I say no, when I say fine jewelry, I don't mean like fine dining. I mean like really delicate jewelry is thin, really thin. Michael was also like, if you want to do something romantic. This happened to a friend of mine recently, her new man, because you know, in the beginning, you write each other messages and they're full of like, oh well, I came a lot of a lot of people do write each other notes, like text messages with love stuff, you know, like you just do. Like there's a lot of back and forth with the beautiful messages. And he got like some excerpts of all the messages they'd given to each other and got it written in calligraphy and framed it. It was really cute. No, but it was so meaningful, like it's it's it's something like that.

I really want a guy to give you that.

If she's really into him, right, she'll love that. If she's not that into you, she'll hate it. Like it can work both ways.

Well, let's give him something that might actually, But.

I'm assuming since you've been together a year, she's into you.

What do you give your missus? You're a no nonsense type of a dude. What do you give Paddy?

What?

What gifts?

Like?

Usually like, if Jackie gets sent roses to work and she doesn't want them, I give them her.

Did you get Did you give her my roses yesterday? No? I didn't. What did Well? I gave to you. God sent these roses yesterday and I the message.

The message didn't make sense to me at all.

It was it said, I feel bad, but if he's listening, if he's listening, please explain.

He said, happy birthday. Sorry I missed it last year.

Loved Michael, And I'm like, it's not my birthday for a start, And I don't know who this Michael is.

So that's maybe they weren't for you.

No, it's it was addressed to me and it said, dear Jackie, but I got them when I was old, had already left, so Lingas sent me a photo of the card, and we just couldn't make sense.

Where are the roses?

Now?

Bruno took them home? Oh is that right?

Yeah? I gave him to my wife.

But but she works in radio, so she knows I wouldn't have bought them. So I was very upfront and saying, I just so you know, I stole them from work.

You know, thanks for everything.

Okay, just a fact check a couple of things, did say Jackie?

Oh yes it did? I think.

Okay, because there's eight other Jackies that work here, so that's what I want to I've never met one. Yeah, Jackie whitelaw in sales Jackie Jackie, Microwave Jackie.

There's heaps microwave Jackie.

He's always heating up the plates with a hot plate. Radio rock and roll. We're a very progressive company. We've got the reader Jackie, the hot flake bitch. There's all types of work here.

We don't discriminate, and there's a job for everyone.

Mitch. I'm going to put you on the intern. Pete. Pete, give him a prize off the birthday. Willing to give his missus something good, like something girls would like make up, hair drys ship like that.

Let me see do you want me to say, Oh, I've got three hundred dollars to treat yourself at in Doda spa.

Where's that is that everywhere?

Yeah?

So you can she would like There isn't a girl out there that wouldn't love a spa experience. Yeah, it'd be hard to find.

We'll give you one of these spa things and she'll like that.

Thank you.

He probably won't.

Get too excited.

I probably wanted a car or something. He's rung the Big Show.

If you want to go on from a cardboard box with a photo of himself inside.

He probably was going to ring nover to get a voucher and he thought he'll ring the Big Show to get something decent. We've just given him an overprice.

Is that disappointing, Mitch, No, I'm happy with that.

I'm happy with that.

I might just send it on myself.

Actually, no, give him two. He get this is for his girlfriend, and you know, three hundred dollars is quite a lot, so you can tag along.

I'm sure there's two.

You could have it to mat.

That's what every guy wants to do is sit in the waiting room with a massage joint. Not a proper point.

I don't know if Das Spa is doing just massages?

Are they I'm not facials and stuff?

But they do.

But that's I'm saying they could go for a couple of minutes.

This isn't going to be spa chat. We're not even going to sit here wondering what the spa service of.

Hey, we're going to do birthday? Well next, are you celebrating your birthday today? And you should call?

Yeah? Thirteen one six five to get through and kiss? Were all birthday times this morning? If it's your birthday this morning, August fourteen, Happy birthday to you. His share with a few famous names. Hallie Berry. Wow, she's gorgeous. Ye, No, I think it deserves a bit more than that.

Yeah, she's a great as far as.

Good looking women go. Yeah, halle Berry is right at the top.

She is.

I agree?

Does anyone disagree with that?

Anyone?

I'm seemed to be the only one excited about her. Oh she's fifty eight, I see she fifty eight?

She is.

Oh she's amazing.

Melakunis forty one, Mealer is Happy birthday, Magic Johnson sixty five years old, Steve Martin, you know that actor white Hair very annoying.

Yeah, yeah, seventeen.

Kate Richie remember her from Home and Away in the famous sex tape. Yes, she's forty six.

Happy birthday, Kate. I hope you're having a great day.

Oh, she's always having a great time. Peter Costello he used to be the Treasurer of Australia. He was the chairman of Channel nine. Then he pushed a little flop reporter over and then said, you know what, I'm out, I quit, I'm done. Is retired legendary feller sixty seven years old.

And it's Hayden's birthday, who's twenty seven years old. Hi Hayden, good morning.

Hey guys.

Are you going?

What are your plans for your birthday? You're getting on it, You're tearing up the town. What's the go Tonight?

Tonight? Not too much?

But Friday, I'm going to a Western barrier in Melbourne. They got like a mechanical bull bit a line dancing.

They've done it before so it could be a bit how fun.

Have you ever seen our cash cock, which is a giant rooster very similar to a mechanical bull.

I have, Yeah, yeah, no, I have.

I think I'd be quite.

Good at it. You should do it.

Yeah, next time.

Have you ridden cocks before?

No?

I have it on the straight man, So no cox for me.

Would you like Would you like your horoscope for today, Leo?

I would, That's the reason I called up horoscope.

Let's see if it apply.

Good luck.

New ideas for your career could be on your mind, Leo's. You might be thinking not only about getting a new job, but also entering an entirely new field. This could be a positive development, but don't be too impulsive and leap without thinking.

You mean like a field of wheat, No, a field of corn?

No, just a field like, not an grass field, just a different field, football field. And if you're not changing up your employment circumstances, maybe it's a different kind of job coming your way.

Wink wink.

Job? Is that what that means?

Yeah, that's what they're trying to say on.

A football field, Bras, That's what I understand.

Are you firstly thinking about changing jobs or entering And.

I just changed fields long ago. I was a carpenter and now I'm apprentice plumber?

So when did you do that?

About a year ago?

It doesn't apply, not changing anytime soon.

So do you have any girls on the scene that could give you a BJ today.

I I've just started saying it's probably happened.

Then yeah, it's a given. It's again, so it's true. Once again, there's.

The horoscope, so all thanks to Channel seven News. Everyone.

It's not theirs.

Well, let's beIN the wheel and get you're in because NAT's got COVID and two broken.

Feet, broken eye.

Well the poor ma and heir needs doing, but she's away for a day. So go pete round and round it goes.

You get your prime.

You can choose the power. Pick two very good songs today slowing down our number nineteen.

Nineteen that is three hundred dollars Birthday Feast at Munich Bra House in southwarf in Melbourne.

The Rock Sydney book online.

But yours is free, brother beautiful, Thanks you.

I appreciate jobs and food.

That's the best ever say for you.

Hey the song Brooklyn's got the song No One's chosen.

Hello Hayden for one for one day only chosen. It's a cod right now.

Then Aiden's only twenty seven, so he still would have been only three years old when this was out.

You know this son, there, I do know the song definitely yeah, when I was in school.

But it's not bad old.

Yeah it's a bit quaint. Yeah, ours is old as well, but it was a worldwide smash in every country on Earth.

Yeah, it's a good song.

The guy Kevin Rudolph made it, wrote it, teamed up with Little Wayne, is called let It Rock.

Very old.

Listen this old listen Little Wayne that you want to you want to go now?

Son?

No, No, they must be the wrong hook. Well done, Fellas Layden.

Do you have a reference there?

Yeah?

I think I'm going to go with Kyle and Jackie all on the time.

Thank you.

And by the way, our both songs were released in the same year, Brooklyn, so sucks you can because yours won't be because you're not.

I will happily do that. It ain't no insult.

It's not an insult.

Remember when I was at Kevin Rudolph's house and I fell asleep in the recording studio and he recorded me snoring and put it in another song.

What songs that is?

I don't know that story?

Here?

You do?

No, I don't. You've never once said that story?

Oh no, I put it in a Brahmi. He put it in a brahmic Faden song. He was recording Brian and that's when I found that other song. Where's the other song of Kevin rudolphs? I found it in his computer.

While I was just I made it.

Yeah, I was smoking weed and I was going through his thing and I said, what's this and he's like, I don't know if i'll put this one out.

I loved this song, and.

I said, mate, you must say that, and he said, I don't know, and then we.

Started playing it on our show and then it was you, this isn't your choice, Hayden By, Yeah, this would never have even been released if I wasn't high going through someone's lappost.

So your story, he's not in this song, not in this one. Can we find that self one day?

Yeah?

Maybe I can't remember this song. So let's play Kevin Rudolph. Let it rock. Here we go, enjoy, Hayen, Happy birthday man, thanks for stand by. The pop quiz is twenty away on the Kyle Jackie thanks to dailymail dot com dot are you everything you need to know?

Right now?

At daily Mail, Jackie has got the latest own us.

Apparently Eminem is a bit lonely actually being a single dad because he doesn't go out on dates or see anyone because he's actually quite fearful of letting down his guard. And it all stems back to when he dated Mariah Kerry and then they had the falling out because.

Everyone who's dated Mariah has some sort of issue.

That wasn't that. It's just that Apparently in the early two thousands when they dated briefly, well, that was.

Really just banging on the side, wasn't It wasn't really boyfriend girl.

Yeah, she was so grossed out by how small his penis was. Yeah, it is this true. Yeah, apparently that's how the feuds started.

How do you even know this? A little dick?

Apparently?

Yeah, it says who Mariah?

Apparently?

Yeah? Is that a tweet?

I mean she has, Yeah, she's tweeted it before.

So like, have either of them admitted that they slept together?

They slept together? Bang?

Has he not said he did?

Or it was a song.

And then she did a song? Yeah?

Yeah, they hated each other anyway, apparently super self conscious after that, the little barely dates and.

As another man with the little dicky, do you understand eminem.

Is that why you locked Paddy down?

Like?

Yeah, because she's like one of your only girlfriend and Zeppa.

Yeah, I couldn't.

I couldn't.

I wasn't really more, I wasn't a casual sex guy. I was to embarrassed because what if, like she went and told everyone about a small dick.

You know, how small is it? Well?

And be honest, it's like the pinky fingernail right now, it's just the nails. Yeah, yeah, it can be that small.

The size of the nail, not the actual pinky.

Yeah, the nail.

Yeah, that's not even a penis.

That's a clip.

That's a little Yeah, that's a clip.

You've got a dick clip.

Well, when it's soft, it just sits there like that. But when when I get a red then it kind.

Of grabb doesn't get when it's when it's th centimeters that's.

Right, yeah, because it's okay, right, Like the way it grows is fine, rubber man, that thing. So do you never stand at urinals? Never?

Never? He's always he's always in the in the sit down part when I see him.

Really, you've been in there at the same time there and and are you curious, kinl Like if he was next to you, would you look or is that so not the dumb thing in a urino.

Nothing I've ever thought. I've never thought. Only once have I thought that. When I've been next to a dude at the urinal, I thought, I'll have a look.

Can you tell, like with your peripheral if a guy's given it a quick glance at yours?

Yes, you can. I feel that you give it?

And is that? Would you go out and tell your mates?

Is it.

You right? Dog?

Oh?

You'd actually absolutely.

You'd say. Some guys, haven't you reckon?

It depends how confident they are, Like if it's sort of a bit drunk and he's like, oh man, look, you know, look at your.

Creepy Maybe that works in with your crowd, but my crowd no, nah.

In gay gays are not looking.

You guys are the troth sometimes, aren't you?

Well, you're either hooking up or you're not looking, you know what I mean. There's no like middle ground.

Yeah.

And the only person's penis that I ever thought of looking at. I didn't even look at it for my own reason. I looked at it on behalf of Jackie.

David Beckham's peenis correct.

Yeah, David Beckham's penis I've seen not a bad penis, and I did it for Jackie, not for my own happiness.

Yeah. Yeah, you wanted to report back to all the girls. Yeah, so you know.

You tell yourself that.

Yeah.

True.

So there's Maria's tweet.

Eminem has a little penis yep.

And he therefore doesn't really date because it's a bit of a thing for him. Apparently.

Well, you can't have everything. If you're one of the world's greatest rappers and you're doing very well financially, Jesus should make sure you suffering. One way is shapable for it.

And now that Ozzy Osbourne is off the booze and the drugs, he has a new addiction, and that addiction is apples.

Really yeah, I'm not off all the drugs, but I love apples now, you know, I'm on the health kick at home forced How many apples?

Yeah?

Ah, three? Three, that's too many, I know.

Oh no, it's not Ozzy Osbourne has like thirty apples a day. No, he does, he does, according to the Whole Family. I want to get through that many apples. Yeah, you could if you're starting from when you wake up.

Like every half hour minute or they were on the podcast The Oso's talking about it.

It will have like he'll pound like thirty apples a day.

It's crazy.

I've never seen anybody eat more fruit than my day.

Daddy eats apples like people eat grape.

My favorite apple of just just good. Pink Lady, A pink lady.

I can't stop eating pink like neither. How to be sad day when we lose, as he on the podcast, because he makes it, he doesn't have to contribute much, but when he does, we all listen.

I love pink great is real. Great family. I know people think, you know, they're crazy, but they are. They fu love and they stand by each other no matter what. That family that that's got to be respected.

So George Clooney is having beef with Quentin Tarantino and that they actually have had beef for quite some time. They well, they work together on a film called Dusk Till Dawn in nineteen ninety six and since then they've never worked again together because they just didn't really gel.

And it isn't Brad Pitt does a lot of stuff with you. Yeah, and Brad Pitt's friends with Clooney.

Yeah yeah, yeah, so it mus he doesn't put himself in the middle of that. But yeah, Quentin did an interview where he's asked about movie stars, and the interviewer then said, what about George Clooney, And Quentin says, he's not a movie star. Name one good movie he's done since the millennium. And then George wasn't having any of it, because when he did an interview with GQ magazine, he admitted he was very irritated by Quentin's comments and he said, that's kind of my whole f in career since the millennium. So now I'm like, all right, f off, dude. I don't mind giving him shit. He gave me ship. So anyway, you.

Know what's George Clany known for, top of mind, the coffee pod machine.

Yeah, Oceans movies were fantastic as they.

Were, but he's known for the coffee pod machine.

Let's take the coffee pod out right.

I can't because he's been doing that.

Take it out because it's just an ad. But if we're talking movie stars, you know, I do love the I don't believe George is up there with the biggest I don't. I think he's just a tad down from a Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio just.

A tag is quite down from them from those two. Oh, I don't know, he's pretaprio.

What scale are you guys comparing him to?

Okay, well to eat Leonardo DiCaprio.

Well, most of Leo's movies is terrible, weirdo shit. People like Leo because it's Leo.

I know.

Yeah, Leo hasn't been in any of the Oceans, but he was my soppy love movie.

The biggest movie of all time, Titanic, like.

George's biggest of all time anymore?

Yeah?

Or was it?

But look at Leo, like, come on, Wolf of Wall Street? You know that? What else did he do? Catch me?

If you can he did.

We don't need the whole bio of you.

But but you know, you don't get bigger than Leo. I don't think he's the best there is. He's the greatest daughter.

Just one of thirteen in the movie.

Yeah, who's bigger, Leo or Johnny Depp?

Leo?

Definitely, I think no Johnny Depp give me apart from Pirates of the Caribbean.

Give me a movie in the last twenty years.

I'm amazing. Quiz Well, that's how you determine making so hugment. We go, he cuts her hair.

He's got scissors.

Yeah, scissor hands is so old you can't even put that in the cadgy.

Well, I can't play with your rules.

The year two thousand.

Right now, I'm not. I don't know. I don't, I don't know. I don't even care about movie stars. They come, they go, They're not even that bigger deal anymore. TV stars are now much more wealthier than movie stars. There's hardly any movies even getting made every year.

I never go to the movie said anymore.

Two hundred movies a year, mate, Now there's like twelve. It's it's it's just I don't know when it was the last time you went to a cinema to see a movie.

I know. But I saw an ad for something the other day. I can't remember what it was, and I thought, oh, great, when's and they said, oh, coming on Thursday at the cinema, and I thought, ah, the cinema.

But the thing is, Colin never last that long. It's like two weeks and then it's on Netflix.

That's right. No, all Foxtel, thank you. I like both of those.

What are you getting paid by Foxtel? Why do you have to throw that in.

Well, because I don't. I don't go I don't I don't really go to Netflix. To Netflix, and I.

Say Netflix, I just mean all streaming playable.

That's not how they think. I bet the folks over at stand don't think she meant she said Netflix the paramount plus people. Yes, she meant Netflix is just the word for all streaming services. Now that's some great marketing from Netflix. It's pretty good.

Okay, guys, coming up shortly, quiz.

Before that, how do I even how do I say this? Pedro? Jackie isn't aware of this. We're doing a test.

I've got it down as pedophiles investigation.

Next, Yeah, me too, show me your feet't the I do?

Has it been changed?

Yeah?

Guys, when we change the show on the fly, you've got to let the girl know.

There were so many papers and why, just.

Like it needs she needs to see what what is it?

What is it that we're doing?

Bruno, Maybe you can maybe I'm too agitated. I'm going to you tell Jackie. I'm going to scold thing.

Good as goal.

All right, So Jackie, some male members of staff have recorded.

The can't Kyle Kyle is in there?

Okay, Kyle, enough with the Theatrix, all right, go go, go go.

So staff have recorded themselves and that includes Kyle taken a Wii and you and you'll have to listen to the audio of the Wii and tell us who you think it.

Is whose dick is pissing? Is the you and Brooklyn will guess.

How do I determine that?

Well, that's up to you.

Well we we We're happy to offer a few little categories that you can rate it on, like see, I.

Guess who's hour of the stream? Who's in it?

First? Tell me?

Yeah, So with all the Kyle intern p myself, Pedro, Cooper, John's and Lockey the geek.

Okay, already you know what's funny already in my head, I think I know how your streams will send.

Yeah, yeah, that's the game discuss, yeah yeah yeah. And the thing is at the in the toilets, Jackie, I think guys will often try to make their piss sound better than it is to impress other men.

Yeah, yeah, it's not funny because a big, solid stream, big dick, you know, And so what are we determining is who I think has a big penis? And then listening to the string, i'd imagine. Sorry, Lockie, I know you've probably recorded.

Almost like a serene Serena's being pushed quickly into the border. Not even serings, Dick. I don't know about the rest of you. Fellas Bruno and Pedro bat someone here. When they do a ship they do not use the brush, and then I go in and for some unknown reason, I try and we their ship off the porcelain. Do you guys do that?

Yeah?

Yeah, I always feel that I'm doing a community service and that I should be like Order of Australia or something like.

It's so satisfied of a piece of feces. Okay, that's enough, Kyle, I don't know, but every guy feels that way. Sure, I'll take your word.

Probably your ship. That's what we were. You putting an end to it.

No, I just don't like talking about this feces in the morning.

I like talking about star signs.

Well, does the star signs make you gag?

Yes?

Does it?

K Jaggio, this is the Kyle and Jackie O Show Morning. It runs a bit what we are streaming men going to the toilet. We're putting a little test together with some of our male colleagues Brooklyn and Jackie will play the game.

Yeah, yeah, now.

Your choices when you hear these whiz. We've all done a wi this morning. We've all recorded it, and you will have to guess whose we is we.

I'm only going to determine this by who the penises that I know about all ready. So like Kyle, he says, I've never seen it myself.

That's the thing for sure.

He says, it's a foxtail remote.

Well, now just let me clarify. It was the size of a Foxtell remote. But since I've stacked on the kilos, half of that is hidden.

The Apple TV remote.

How No, it's pretty small.

No it does. It still comes out, but half of it's in like a fat pouch. You know, you remember what the fat pounce was like? Was only a year ago you had that big gun. It was.

I love how you can't take anything.

You have to throw it back twice.

You said micro and anything.

Or because you said it had disappeared of the story. What I know is that intern Pete absolutely has a big one. Because I've seen his dps, so I know true that's classed as big. Here his was. Everyone was impressed. We were shocked, actually, yeah.

Okay, so your choices, Me, Bruno, Pedro, Peter, Inte, Cooper, and Lockie. We've all recorded it.

I also know that Bruno said his penis is long and thin foreskin. Bruna, well, no, he said, imagine you're you're rolling Plato in your.

Hands with such a long foreskin. Jackie, I reckon there could be a bit of like plaster.

And you would know more about this than me.

Yeah, because I think it would come out instead of like stream, it's like, yeah, bits sprinklers all over the place.

And then and then Cooper I think just has like average size.

I'm not sure what would you say that.

I think I don't know.

I feel like he's because I feel like you've said that, whether it's off air.

Or on a down planning. I see what you're doing. Brother.

Did you say that I've never spoke about my penis, haven't you? Okay?

Okay?

And and by the way, average is good like that, it's a good No one's complaining about an average, so no.

One wants to describe themselves.

Hold says that he's seen Cooper's dick.

Have you?

Oh my god, Hold, head of security and head of audio.

Just quietly whatever he has got.

A hammer on him, has he it's a big one.

It's not small. Oh, so it's larger than average.

So are you a trough gazer? Are you you gaze at other men's junk at the trough?

I wouldn't say I'm a meat gazer, but when you are using the trough and Cooper John's walks right.

Up to you with his cock in his hand, look at it.

So it is big.

Okay, that's good to know, all right.

And then Lockie the geek who knows that's the mystery penis.

And is Pedro not in this?

Yeah, Pedro he has.

Is it officially classed as a micro? Is that what it's known?

Not medically diagnosed as micro?

Because you've never shown it to a do that's right?

Yeah?

Okay, but we're just checking that because that's an official term, isn't it.

Yes? It is?

Yeah, right, And there's nothing to be scoffed at. No, you know, well you not allowed to scoff Yeah, okay.

It sounds like a scoff to me.

Here we go with the game. Are you ready?

Yeah?

Brooklyn and Jackie Ki, your ear is on. Here is stream number one?

Yeah, that's.

Bruno just going Bruno.

I reckon, just in the p you can hear it's Bruno.

I think you can hear.

It's sloppy.

It's not like in the way it might come out in a syringe. This is coming out in a funnel.

We've got to mark them by splash out of ten splash effect there, how much would you give that?

Out of ten splashes?

Like a nine pressure volume of volume is liquid nine and then.

Nine time taken nine.

So you're claiming, what are you saying that.

Bruno bone? I thought, Bruno immediately.

You're right, but it was unnecessary.

Yeah, well that's that just seals the deal for me.

Okay, here is staff member winging number two that sounds like a woman.

Really tailed off of the everything's a five out of ten there, heed row Locky yep, I would agree it's Locky. Immediately, I thought, Locky, Okay, you're running Locky.

What do you can we I need to hear them all though, but.

I can can re shuffle at the end.

Yeah, we can do that.

Let's go lucky for.

Okay, Locky's dick.

Okay, contestant staff member number three weeks, that's good.

Ship, I reckon, that's intern people.

I thought that too. If we get it all right.

In turn, Pete, now, what do you give all of those? Out of ten?

I'd give this.

It wasn't like a huge amount of splash.

I thought that's a ten out of ten, Peter, Yeah, yeah, clean, forceful for a long time.

I'm going eight out of.

Ten, really really studying the form. T Yeah, eight out of ten for everything. Okay, you've written down intern p okay, staff member wing number four please.

Very similar.

I think that's Cooper.

Yeah, I'm going eight out of ten.

But I do think those last two interchangeable.

Cooper, I agree, but let's lock in Cooper there, Okay.

Stream out number five.

I started off week.

I had.

Who's we start off week?

And strong?

I believe that's Locky because I think Locke's always full of surprises. You have impegged as one thing, and then he turns around and still going, yeah, I reckon that's Locky and the other one's pedro.

Thing won't turn that tap off?

Okay, you to change number two to Pedro and I'm going to change that one to Locky.

And is that then everyone?

No, there's one one who's left then.

Well, this would have to be Kyle.

If you guys are right, this would be me. If they're wrong, who is this streamer?

That's Kyle Kyle, because you put their little extra effort. They're trying to impress.

You write that one down as me. Both of you are saying, what do you give it out of ten? Seven?

Okay, we'll go seven. Okay, all right, let's get the results.

The results are in. Everyone. Have you got a drone their thing to make the segments sound better, you know, to make that sort of hype up a bit with the results, you know, like on you know, who wants to be a millionaire? The lights all changed. There we go, where's the stream? You've got nothing? Here we go the results.

So we said Bruno for stream number one.

And you guys were correct. Streaming number two, we originally said.

Locky, Yeah we did, but we changed changed to Pedro.

Would you like to lock one of those in? Lock your Pedro?

I'm happy with Pedro Pedro? WELLKEI Pedro incorrect?

That was Locky.

Done our original yet Streaming number three you gave it night out of ten. Very happy with the sound.

Again, we said this could have been Peter or Cooper, and we've blocked in Peter into Pete is correct. Yes, good.

The next one there was, that was the one you were swapping Locki Pedro, LOCKI Pedro.

No no, this one is said, yeah, sorry, and I reckon.

This could have been YouTube.

Same number four, you guys locked in Cooper John's that is correct.

Oh my god, Jackie.

Streaming number five, that was the locky Pedro confusion. Yeah, we already know that it's not that. That's not locky, that is Pedro.

Oh so we actually would have got it all right, just for the last one.

Mighty urination. Let's roll that piss again. This is me, give it another thunder. There we go.

We can not full Lord that we knew. I thought when you told me about this, I thought, there's no way we're going to be able to.

Go because if anyone knows Dix, it's Jackie Owen Brooklyn.

Yeah, you're right, Jackie.

Only recently the last few years. She would never have been able to do this five years ago.

Wow.

Should we do a girl version tomorrow?

Okay, get them flaps ready, ladies. I think there should also be a bit of a vision attached to that tomorrow as well. Is for social media.

Okay, Well, you guys very well, well, yeah, okay, if you guys want to play pop quiz ten grand up grabs on thirty and one, I six, then.

A big confession. They say, I don't got no idea what the confession is, but they say the biggest confession A surprise, a shock shock. Well it's about fifteen minutes away out of pop Quiz, and.

Jackie os ten dozen dollar plup Quiz pop Quiz.

Tomorrow it's worth ten grand. Sorry, Friday is the fifty thousand, ten grand to try and give away this morning? Belinda, you're planning. How are you?

Hey?

I'm so good.

How are you?

You're great?

Do you feel like a winner itself?

Just getting through and you feel you feel confident? Like do you usually get quite a good amount when you're playing at home?

Yeah, if I'm not under pressure, I can get a ten thousand, I get eight hundred, So okay, that's not under pressure.

See it's always different.

If here are the rules, sixty seconds every question, you're right, you get one hundred, all ten wins, you're ten thousand. You're all start here, we.

Go, good luck. Buzz Light Cheer is a character from which film franchise Toy Story who hosts The Chase Australia TV show The Chase Grandior, No Larry in film production? What do the letters BTS stand for? Bets plus times an equal? Are albums by which English singer?

And Sharon?

How many children does Mariah Carey have?

One? Or two?

Two?

Emily Radakowski is reportedly dating which country singer who's starred in the twenty thirteen science fiction film Gravity. Which singer became the youngest ever Disney legend this week? Oh, I don't know. The Pharrell Williams song Happy was on the soundtrack for which twenty thirteen film Wowo. The only female to play the character em In James Bond.

Oh that's short headed woman.

Yeah, Judy Dan Yeah, oh god, look we got three hundred. It's better than nothing, better than nothing?

Thank you anyway?

Three hundred worth it BTS stands for behind the scenes. Emily Radikowski reportedly dating sh Boozy.

You should have just said whoever the current big time deal is? Because I think Emily moves like.

Soon as there's a news web's hot right now, She's on it.

Gravity That starts. Sandra Bullock, Miley Cyrus, the youngest ever Disney legend and Pharol Williams song Happy was indespicable. Me too.

I should have known that.

Yeah, I should anyway, that's all right, that's right.

You're welcome, honey and not happy Spending confession booth, they say, is a pretty eye opening Do you know anything about it?

No?

I don't know, but I do hear it is quite the story.

Okay, So it's a girl making the confession, so that's always very exciting. Yeah, okay, she's been.

Up to We'll talk to her and find.

Out she's a naughty girl and then she has.

To confess it to whoever needs confessor.

That's right. By next this is my favorite part of that song, the end.

I love that song.

All the girls do. Why do you guys all like singing those pits squeally?

No?

I don't like singing it. It's so hard to sing. But it's a good song, says who says me? In my opinion, I like it.

You girls, you like it.

It's growing on me. I think it's no, but it does.

It definitely grows on you.

Genital warts grow on you as well, and that's not always.

Yeah, you don't learn to love those, right, Brooklyn.

I never had.

I've admitted to you had warts someone you had did you have the warts? In turn, peat, I don't know what's for me at all. Someone had the wartst.

No, he had crabs and chlamydia.

I don't think he had gone area.

Where's our sex? Added? Yeah, but nobody, Josh.

Is he probably had gone around.

He would have had warts. Is he here?

Yeah, he's here.

He's just filming something.

I think he's here right now.

Yeah. Probably he's probably got the wart remover on. It's a real pain our best. Okay, this young lady, Lauren, she's delightful.

Let's say hello, Hi Lauren, Lauren, Hi guys, you honey.

This is called confession booth Jackie.

She's got quite the confession. A few months ago, she had a huge night with her bestie Rachel. They stayed at Rachel's house. They drank all night, got really raady love it. Finally they went to bed when they could drink no more so Rachel and Lauren. And Rachel's got four French bulldogs, right Lauren?

Yeah, yeah, so you're at her place?

She randomly Lauren woke up randomly with a big suden urge to let a big ship out. Nothing worse than when you're at someone else's house and you've got to do a monster Grogan. Now you tell the rest of the story, Lauren. So you woke up, you were drunk, your mates, you had to do a ship immediately.

Yeah, so we fell a sleep in the bed together, and yeah, I got up and I had that sudden urge to go. And obviously I've been drinking all night, so I knew that it was going to be like a grog gog.

Yeah.

Yeah, And then I got out of bed, and I think because the bed so high, just jumping out of the bed, I literally couldn't hold it. So I'd pulled down my pants, not realizing that I'm standing in one of the dog's beds and it's just come out. And I grabbed the bed, dragged it into the hallway, and because I didn't want to wake her up because she'd just fallen asleep, and then one of the dogs had jumped off the bed, followed me out, jumped in. The dog wed that I.

It wouldn't have been a solid thing.

With all that, No, No, it was, yeah, it was like and then the dog, the dog I had run in it and run throughout the house and I'd panic I'm too hungover to clean me.

Oh no, so your feces is just over the house and the.

Yeah, and I left. I grabbed my stuff on yeah.

Oh no, did she ever bring it up?

Like, oh, you wouldn't believe what happened.

No, So she called me the next night and she said, oh, thank god you left when you did, because I woke up to dog shit all throughout the house and.

Yours and she's on her hands and knees scrubbing it and it's yours.

And I thought I got Yeah, I'm like, oh god, thank god I got away with that.

So why on earth?

After all?

When was this?

How long ago?

It was about four months ago?

Oh my god, you're home and host you're free of this. You evaded it, and now and now you're going to confess. Why why are you doing it?

I just I feel like you guys in the middle of the mediators. It's been eating away at me for months, like this is my best friend, like my bestest friend in the whole life world.

That's one thing you can keep dark for the rest of your life. I feel. And I don't think you're hurting anyone by keeping that.

However, Lauren, will you doubt it.

That you've got Rachel as your friend who has four dogs, and this happened, someone's going to hear it.

It's too late.

So we're going to ring this this friend of yours, Rachel, and you're going to tell her it was your poopy. Yeah.

She's a bit of a heart head. So I'm really nervous.

Oh she is she really?

Yeah?

Hmmm, see this this guilt, I don't have it. I don't have guilt. I don't think about it.

But remember when we did this, asked and you scored very high on that test, the sociopath test.

Yes, thank you very much. I did do a very good job on that, didn't I'm the top of the school when it comes.

To That's the one time you've actually scored top mark.

That's right, and I'm very proud of it. Okay, Oh you've got a dog too, have you? Lauren?

Lauren, I've got one?

Yeah, I've got Wow.

What kind of dogs are they?

Hers?

Their friend food dogs. So they're really little and.

You'd expect it to you know what I mean?

Always Well, they like they jump on our bed, like they place on the bed. They like they're blad everywhere. They're indoor dogs.

I wonder if they jumped back on her bed, they would have. You wouldn't know that because she probably didn't go into a great detail, right, No, she.

Just said they I feel like run throughout the house.

Yeah, when we when we get her on the phone, we have to ask in detail to clean it up. Where exactly was it? Did you get on your hair? You know, when you're cleaning your dogs poo, you really have to get in there and soak it and smudge it and like get it out.

Was their carpet floorboards?

Yeah, there's carpet in the lounge room at the rest of the house's floorboards.

And what color carpet? Was it?

Gray?

Nice?

All right, we'll take a short break and we will call Rachel and confess. Not me, you or you Laura sitting here enjoying every moment of it.

Well, earlier we met Lauren who told us she had a big weekend with her girlfriend getting on the blinder, really getting rotten drunk, jumped into bed together with the four bulldogs, and then Lauren, ah man, she really had to do it like a lady's shit in the middle of the night.

Yeah, Well, it was like four or five in the morning, I.

Think, yeah, and then the middle of the night was not for us.

For us is the normal warning normal folks. But she as she jumped out of bed, it wasn't going to wait.

And just the gravity alone jumping out of the bed forced the feces to fall from her bottom hole.

Into the dog bed, which actually was a great option because you can pick that up and get rid of it easy. However, one of the dogs jumped into the dog bed, got it all over himself, and trapesed it all through the house, over the carpet, and she did a runner. Now, Lais never told her friend it was her. The friend always thought it was the dog poop.

You've kept it dark for four months. You're riddled with guilt for some unknown reason known only to Lauren.

She has to get it off her chest.

You're ready to talk to your friend, Rachel.

Oh, I guess though, I'll.

Wait for this.

I can't wait.

Okay, let's get let's get her on now. Then by Rachel's on. Hi, Rachel, good morning, Hey.

Good morning, how are you, thank you?

How are you very well? Very well? Sorry to interrupt. Are you busy you're getting ready for work or someone or what are you doing.

I'm actually at work already.

Are you sitting down?

Yeah?

Okay, good, because your friend Lauren is here and she is wanting to.

Confess something to you, Rachel.

Okay, yeah, any idea is Rachel?

What it might be that Lauren's going to confess?

No?

Should I be worried?

Not not worried, worried, but you may be concerned. Okay, Lauren, here's your bestie, Rachel.

Hi, how are you?

Yeah?

Sorry, there's just something that I need to go with my churs. So remember that night that I slept over last and.

Yeah, asleep together.

After that big night. I remember how you called me the next day and said, you know, lucky I left because yeah, it's like shut everywhere. What if I told you that it wasn't dogs?

She is?

What do you mean?

Wait?

Wait?

Sorry, wait what that giant ship fell out of your friend's asshole? Not your dogs?

Are you that that was a pooh you were cleaning up.

Through the house?

You just left it there and let them run it through my house?

I don't know all. I didn't, I didn't mean to. I honestly I pulled the bed out. I'm like, I pulled it out and then Coco jumped off the bed and run through it, and then it was And then I freaked out. I said, I'm too hung over to clean this, and I freaked and I ran and I was going to just throw the dog bed out, but Coco jumped off the bed and like run throughout the house.

Oh my god. You know, I had to clean a like, I had to throw out everything. I had to get my carpet see and cleaned my lounge for only telling me.

Was it all over the lounge as well?

Yeah, the dogs run feral. There's four of them.

Did it go into your bed as well?

On the bed, yes, Oh my god, it went all over the bed. That's why I caught her the next day and said, thank god you weren't here.

For the Yeah you were thinking was oh, I'm so glad. Lauren is an inconvenience throughout all of this.

What a wonderful friend.

And did it any stage you get the feces on your fingers, Yes, it's you're cleaning that up. You're gonna get it, just gonna get it on you.

It's going to go through the no matter how no matter how thick you wipe up towel is you're going to get it.

Do you at the time think this is particularly pungent, this one or is it just the same as the dog?

Well, you know, like they don't normally die in the house.

So was it really runny or really was it was?

It was really runny, and god, it was everywhere.

It's probably still a white.

Crip cover, so you can imagine.

Yeah, so where are we talking? The lounge carpet, the lounge.

Week carpet, my bed away from the bed driven down to the right, and her own bed.

You're pulling my leg. I don't know if it's just true.

Oh, it's true. Yeah, we were quite when we heard. We were quite taken back.

Oh my gosh.

Well thanks for that.

I appreciate it.

I wish I was lying. I'm sorry. I feel so bad now knowing that you had to steam clean the carpet and the lounge like I didn't know that.

Ye believe that's true.

To your next sleepover, ladies. That'll be fun. The next time you guys sleep over.

She can freaking sleep in cocoas bed with her, just in case she needs it again.

Yeah, any better than I thought.

She's handled it quite well. Because Rachel Lauren said that you have the potential to click it, so.

She was, I do, but this is pretty funny.

It is funny, and it's done. It's over now. But imagine at the time. I can't imagine. How long did that take you to clean up? Oh?

A good two hours? But the smell will didn't come out. I believe everything.

Open, Laura, you were smelling everywhere? Do you like to go and pool in her bed? To make it even.

Now?

I don't talk about that. I'm pretty private, actually do.

But I should rather do it on the slide. Never mentioned it. Thanks for handling it so well, Laura. There you go, no problem. You don't have the guilts now.

Yeah, she had it way better than I thought.

You just have the reputation now. So Lauren, good luck living with that. Hard to get over. What a disappointment.

I thought she was going to call her a filthy as rats. And you want to go to the Logis, we will send you there. Walk the red car, but you'll be inside with all the stars. All you have to do is guess what is Colleen watching on TV?

Peter, you not inter and Pete's been banned by the Logis organizers. Yeah I didn't.

You're talking to listeners, and by the listeners, the listeners can.

Win Pete your band. Yeah still, and you know why when you stole the logi last year, that was the straw that broke the logi Camel's back.

Yep, yep, that was the secret. We're never going to talk about on it.

Jackie bought it up. Did because of Jackie's loose lips. You will never go to the logis again ever.

And we had a good Is that why?

I don't think it is?

It is stolen logi is what broke They.

Said, I'm so sorry, Peter. All these things.

Happened from time to time.

They happened quite regularly with him.

And that story didn't even make it into my book as a payoff. None of the stories about you made it.

Remember when you were painted up as a gold logo and you were.

Tuling Jurassic Park and Julia Morris got annoyed because I got gold all.

Over their nice outfits. And also that girl from One Tree Hill said, lady's name there Bush, No, no, no, no, that's the beautiful girl, the one, the Australian girl. Rachel.

Yes, she hates Rachel Griffith. She swan yelled at me.

On Instagram.

Is Swan yelled at you?

She was like to bring small statue of people to logos? Is too far?

Have a job? Is that well?

Dwarfs for hire dot com dot a year, great website if you want a dwarf. One of the Malay boys, except one of them got caught on fire at a footy club once, so he's still.

The sense is telling you off about? I'm telling a factual story.

What did she tell you off about?

I think saying that you correct? Yeah, I believe who makes the decision on what we can and can't say? Who's the one person who sits in an office deciding what this person and that person is allowed to be called. It's ridiculous unless it's being said with malice and intent to hurt. Shouldn't we be able to say anything?

Has been many times in the same way that the F word for gay people has been used with malice.

Yeah, even if you say it really friendly, Yeah, still daylight.

But you can shorten it and then it's fine, right, Yeah, Yeah, such a bag.

You know.

I wouldn't say that.

Actually, that didn't feel right, so but I would say bag hag.

Yeah, yeah, just I recommend.

Just I'm pretty sure, I said in my book.

I know that's fine.

Have you dropped the N word in your book?

As well as who Knows what she thinks? At Home? The Peter Files, which is a segment that in turn Pete does where he investigates other members of staff or other things of notoriety around the world.

Yes, I can't wait. Apparently he's onto a successful one this time.

Big case with an outcome.

We have a end of outcome well, because often there's no outcome. That's why I moved it from earlier in the show to the ars end of the show.

Yeah, hopefully doesn't get rushed because there's a lot of stuff.

To get it.

I'll probably be rushed, That's all right, old fast.

What's Colleen watching is next?

Tickets to the logis for you and all your friends, Red Carpet and Live in the Theater.

Jaggio Pale and Jackie O's What's Colleen Watching?

Colleen was from South Africa, came to Australia, chased out of the country I believe, few warrants and whatever. Anyway, landed in Australia, started selling radio ads for US and was a remarkable saleswoman.

She landed the spinal account.

Yeah, she got the Garlos Pie's account. Oh, she got the Neueva San Gria account.

She had all the big account yeah, and then she bailed on us here in Australia and warrants.

Where is she'd? Apparently she's fled to the UK.

Now she's selling advertising there.

Yeah, for Capital Radio in London, if anyone's looking for her?

So who Anyways, she is watching a TV show and we have to guess what is TV show? For your tickets to the Logi.

Awards A couple, but you and three friends going to the logis Walking the Red Carpet if you're not in Sydney, that's where the logis Is will fly you in from anywhere anywhere on Earth accommodation flights. And the Night of Nights for television, The Night of Night. Watch it on Channel seven Sunday night. If you miss it live seven plus.

So let's go to our first caller. You'll get one little bit of audio here of Colleen watching the show. She'll tell you what she's seeing to help you out with clues. Ranya, Hi there, good morning. Hello.

Okay, here's Colleen. You won't be able to hear the show. You'll only be able to hear her commentary. Okay, okay, good luck guessing.

I love this show.

I would definitely go on it because you lose so much weight and you become very skinny.

By the ed Oh any ideas what show.

That currently exists?

Or is?

Can it be an old show?

It can be any show seen on Australiana?

Right, all right, ideas run here?

Well my first thought was the biggest loser.

That's what I thought.

Lose that does That's the first thing I thought, as well, is it the biggest loser?

No?

No, I think I know what it is now. It was one of two.

Let's see Jordan, Hi, Jordan.

You're on more of watching the show? Have a listen.

They film the show in South Africa.

They'd be eaten by lams in tigers in elephants.

Oh sorry, I thought.

It was something else.

Jackie still has now follow her lead. I know now, I don't know if you do, I think I do. What do you think it is?

Maybe I'm a celebrity.

I'm a celebrity.

Get me out of what I thought.

No, that's not right, that's not that's not the show Colleen's watching. They do film it in South Africa. You're silly, billy.

They do.

Actually, so you're right, But I now know what it is now I do.

It's not hid No now, hey, Lauren, Hi, you're on?

Hey Lauren?

Hello, Hi, Hi. Okay, let's hear the next bit.

I love all the TV tortues. It's giving very Hawaii Barie Holiday. It reminds me of a classy oily joint in Tarly.

Okay, Lauren, anyway, is I think?

Is it survivor?

It is survival? Well done?

Congrats you are, Lauren. Where in Australia are you living, Lauren?

I'm in Melbourne.

Flights accommodation all for you. Logans, three Friends, sixty fourth TV week Logo Awards.

It's this weekend, honey.

You can vote now if you want. If you haven't got your votes in vote quickly. TV week logis dot com do you and then watch them on Sunday night channels.

You and three friends? Oh man, who are you going to take it?

I don't know I've got I don't know.

If I have three three friends, I'll probably take my mom.

To Yeah, nic are you're a loser, But no, you got a few close friends, no doubt.

Someone Yeah, for sure, it doesn't hurt to take like not everyone's like you, Jackie, that doesn't like spending time with your mother.

I love my mom.

I love spending time with her.

It didn't sound like that when you were like scoffing and she wanted to take her mom. She said, all nice, you rolled your eyes roll for lunch to me.

Don't listen to him.

I'm thinking my mom for a lunch.

And that's what you're gonna do. You're gonna look after your month.

I look after my mom all the time. She only just came from here.

She was also for two months. Yeah, it was about three weeks ago, thank you, yea month. Are we competing over how much love we give our moms?

Sure if you want to, because you've.

Only just started giving that love, like you have only just in the last six months done stuff like this. Before that, her husband barely answered her call.

You know, she listens.

Okay, now I feel bad. Okay, I love you, bam. And that's not true. He's always loved you.

That's not true.

You love her doesn't because she's so beautiful. I just adore her.

Yeah, yeah, I've told her, don't turn into some local skank because you're single.

Now, she wouldn't.

She's just not like that.

She's already had some gentleman callers.

Oh I know, no, but she hasn't taken them up.

All right, I've forbidden it. Yeah, yeah, that that clams out of action. Now. My brother and I have had a discussion. The clams closed.

To your business.

She can do what she wants.

No, I came out of that clams.

You don't know.

I've got some. I've got some say. At least if your mother and failer split up, what do you want your mum horn around?

Got your mom there, Kyle?

If hey Mum, Hi Pam?

I love hi Jackie?

How are you uncle?

I'm good?

You know Kyle is taking ownership over your clam.

Yes, and I said it is right, not just me, but also my brother. The clams close, the clams closed to business, isn't it? Mum?

What is a clam?

Exactly? Yes, Jackie, it's Jackie's word, it's your you know you.

Oh no, I've got no right to that.

Exactly.

We came out of that clam.

That doesn't mean to say you own it.

That's correct. And you know what Pam should be some influence, living.

Her best life and that, you know, taking.

On a lover for it me. No, God, no, no, no, well no, I see a window a window.

Well, let's put it this way.

If that was my way of thinking, I did have an opportunity.

Since I've lived.

Here, I know, and I feel like yes, men make yourself sound like summer ho. No, she just got hit up in the street. Yes, we've got your other son.

Brothers here.

Now, guys, you've you've opened up a can of worms. Chris, I'm saying you don't have the right to tell your mum she can't, you know, be open for business if she wants to.

I've never said that in my life. Mum can do whatever she wants.

God, Chris around now, Chris.

No, you told me that guy on the bike.

Nah, and you didn't even meet him.

What guy on the bike?

And he told me.

And he told me, I hope you said no.

And that's like, I don't even know what you're talking about.

Guy approaching in the street. Let's bring on.

There as well.

Hi, Hi, Hey Annie, Mum's on the phone as well. Hey Auntie, Hi.

How are you love good?

Long time?

No?

See, yes, I'm still the same.

Jill. Jackie is really throwing a sparrow into works. I said, mums clams closed for business. She's had enough marriages, that's it. Do you agree?

Well?

No, what should she?

Would you? Right?

Exactly?

Yes?

Once bitten three times shy?

Do you like there'll be someone There'll be someone else out.

There for you?

Pay guys.

I've got uncle Bruce there as well.

Bruce. We were just talking about Pam. We don't believe she should be closed for business.

You don't believe she should be. I believe it's finished.

What do you reckon, Bruce?

Well, yeah, that's what I think.

Still left is. Actually you've never had a bit of compliment. You've still had a bit of life left in here.

That's right, It is a compliment. Hi Bruce, Hi, how are you going in a couple of weeks.

Here as well?

Good morning dad?

What's going on?

It is because we're talking about Pam. You know, Kyle's mum, she's she's she's single.

I'm saying that Vagina should be closed.

For business, and I'm saying it should be open.

Well that's the wrong word, open for business.

Yeah, what do you think, Dad?

Don't answer?

Yeah?

Open for business?

Oh, it's all right for everybody else?

What about me.

I own.

He's saying it should be open for business.

Yes, but if you find the right guy it will be.

This is sad.

No, there's no right guys for me.

No, well I have.

For you maybe, But there's plenty of girls nobody for twenty thirty years, don't do anything, and they find the right guy and they become little buddy mpho.

How do you know that, dad?

Well, yeah, he's been running the block.

Man, I've spoken to him. What do you say, Jackie, what do you think I under a rock or something?

No?

But like what women are you talking to?

That?

A massive therapists and stuff like that, right, Tony.

No golf club girl, yeah, rat to go club full of them?

Really, so many men are taking up golf these days.

No, I've been going to the wrong party.

You have been, mum. You've been wasting your time with the lawn bowls.

Hey, sorry, there's a lot of family members. I've got your nephew Sewan Sandlands on the phone.

Sawn Sandalands, Hey, Shawney, where are you bro?

Good morning.

I'm actually at the Echo at that moment.

It's a very very west.

Are you at the Brisbane show the Echo?

Yeah, we're talking my mom's Do.

You remember my mom? Sean remember your mom? Do you remember your son? Sean?

Mum?

Do you remember here?

Hello?

Sean?

How are you?

Hello?

Paham, how are you?

I'm really good?

Thanks Sean, thank you.

We're wondering about mum's vagina. Should it be open or close for business?

Uh?

Well if if she still wants it to be open, and then it should be open to your mom.

Sean's the sensible sandalands.

That he's a sensible one.

Well, he's a sensible young man.

What about me?

You're not You're not a sandaland I am. You had your shot, then you've but I'm hanging on.

I'm hanging on with with you know, tight knuckles, like like Chris Jenner.

You want to get a cat?

You're at the sand Lands next Peter.

Sorry, I've got hajo Hay.

Your gardener Kyle also on the phone.

Hey, good morning, sir. We had a chat yesterday. Hey ho hey stopped the the leaf blower for ten or fifteen minutes while he entertained me on the balcony.

Did you meet my mom?

Did you meet my mum? Hoo?

He yes?

Hello, hello, yes, yes, you like my mom? Bring her in bring of course.

Yeah, yeah, another, Yeah, you've got your nanny on the phone.

There, Sam? Hi? Sam?

Hi?

How did you get in on the hex?

Sam?

You lucky girl.

It's Pam here.

How are you hi?

How are you good?

Luck? Yes?

You know what? Lunch is canceled. I've done all the talking I can for today.

Well, when you don't have to talk, you just have to sit there and look at us.

I can.

No, you can't cancel lunch.

What is Sam in?

Is Sam in some vortex in the.

Space doesn't Yeah?

Okay, somewhere are you Sam?

You want hands free?

I'm yeah, I'm driving on the way home.

Oh okay, we already dropped. I've got your personal ship as well.

The morning morning.

Hey Chris, how are you?

Bro?

Fantastic mate.

But by the way, beautiful steak and rice and properly last night. I enjoyed it. Thank you for that. Thank you. You're a wonderful chef. Cooked that it's brown?

Want how do you cook it?

Chris?

In the pan?

Exactly right and a bit above and fantastic.

He sees it in the pan and then into the oven for the finished off.

Very nice.

Yeah mum, you go woman, Yeah, yeah, a lot of people men play with.

That's enough of you, Jackie. Not everyone has to be an old whore. Not everyone. Okay? Now is that it? No more, no more family, no more staff.

We have no more lines left to call it.

We literally blocked every line.

I'm surprised George the driver didn't get a guernsey. George.

Oh, Peter, get ready because the pedophiles is coming up. The family members, do you write that? O'ld do wone news and then we'll do your Peter files.

All things to dailymail dot com dot you everything you need to know right now on Daily Mail, Jackie has got some own news for us.

Adam Sandler and Joe Rogan we're doing a podcast together and talking about the infamous Oscar slap Will Smith slapping for Rock on stage.

One of my favorite things. Yeah, I I'm one of the very few that would have done exactly what Will Smith did. Someone shit cans you misses, you give them a little Well.

They're going to talk about that the Will part in a second, but first they're talking about how that moment did wonders for Chris Rock.

I think that was like the best thing that ever happened to him because then it became like wild again.

Like his standard was like outrageous, Like it was like the Rock of Old. That night was like watching a super Bowl. He was just like, what, it's a live event.

Holy?

What the h?

He was at badass and I think he had some white shit on and you look cool as fucking because if you.

Have a life changing event like getting slapped at the Oscars in this most preposterous scenario, I think for him was also a wake up call like, hey, these motherfuckers don't really care about me in that moment. Yeah, yeah, they didn't protect me. Nobody stopped it. He went back and sat down, and then he got an award afterwards and got a standing ovation.

What is going on? Was weird?

Yeah, because you want you always want to be that guy who's hosting the Oscars and who's starring in the big movies. But then you realize, like, well these people are.

You know, like how nobody tackled him, weird moment, weirdness.

And then they talked to him.

They wanted someone to tackle Will Smith. Yeah sounds ridiculous. Who's going to tackle Will Smith?

Well, I mean it's kind of like the moment was over before it even began like he slapped and me walked off like it's not like he laid into him.

On the ground.

Then he was giving him a real hiding like that would be yeah.

But but but by the time that you even realized what was happening, he was walking off stage and.

It seemed like it was all played like.

A lot of people thought like it was that a bit or did that just happen? But then when you saw Chris Rock's face, you went, oh, no, that's not a bit, that's it might learn.

A lessen keep keep keep your keep your lips quiet about other people's wa was not everyone puts up with that shit.

But he didn't even say anything about that pile.

The guy's been trying to root Jada Pinkett Smith behind the scenes for ages. That's the deal. That's the deal. No one new he's been trying to sniffer around.

Well, I don't know that, I'm sure.

I mean, yeah, and they were always saying they were in some sort of open relationship or whatever it is.

Anyway, at the end of the day, you talk about a dude's wife, you may get a slap.

That's just the reality of life. Well, Joe Rogan and Adam Sandler believe that this has ruined his Will Smith's legacy.

Now it's like a guy just showing his ass, Like you just pulled your pants down and showed the world your ass, Like why did you do that? He probably doesn't. He probably wakes up in the middle of the night going why did I do that? Whole thing was sucks beyond it was almost like a guy who doesn't know how normal people act, thinking this is what you're supposed to, go smack that guy.

It became just just went to a place that he couldn't get out of and started it.

And still there, He's still there in everybody's mind. When you see Will Smith, Oh he slapped Chris Rock, that's like, I mean, not I am legend, not Muhammad Ali, not insanely good movies. Yeah, that's an incredible act. Absolutely, It's been in so many banger movies. He's a blockbuster movie star, and people see him they go, oh, he slaped Chris.

Rock, that guy and sucks. It's goddamn it, terrible sucks. I like that.

Adam Sandler's trying not to get too involved.

He's just gone, yeah, sucks.

You can tell Adam was not interested in at all chatting event. I'm surprised Joe Rogan. I thought I just thought Joe's would be on a different side there, not on the the Woosy boys side of life.

Of opinions on it right, like all.

Anyone else here. I think that, Yeah, because I look at that Will Smith Slappin's thought I would have done that. Is anyone else with me? Or are you?

Oh?

Violence isn't the answer. That's what most people are supposed to think.

Like going to a comedy show and hearing a joke and thinking, I don't know, and that's what.

That's not what it was. The guy was insulting his wife in an auditorium of their peers.

But everyone gets that cale with those singers. Look at Ricky Gervais. He insults everyone. We all think it's hilarious.

It's a different type of insult that he.

Was toasting and telling jokes. Isn't that the same he.

Was trying he was making the guy I was just you gotta listen. Chris Rock was trying to root Jada Pinkett Smith behind the scenes, and that's what the problem was. Then he started doing the ball jokes. When the chicks got alopecia. Oh that's right. Yes, there's all these real things behind the scenes. It's not just Will slapping the shit out of under Gronk. He did it for to defend the on of his wife and all other people with alopecia. That ship, there's anyone, so all you will see boys out there, you would all just sit there and let them ship. Can you know?

Look, I was I was against Will Smith, but when I heard your perspective, like if I put myself in those shoes exactly, and Patty was insulted in the space like that.

Jeff was trying to your wife, and then yeah, having to go about something you kids, I'd try and bash.

Probably it wouldn't have worked out the same for you.

Pet Hey, Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars are up to something.

We think.

We think they're going to release the song soon together. Oh that sort of time, which would be kind of not romance.

Very good, one of the greatest of all times. You just don't know.

So we don't know for sure, but this is what we know so far as to why we think they're releasing a song. So Gaga shared a video to her socials teasing some new music, but really, there's not much to go on because it's just some piano stuff, right, which I could play for you. But she's wearing a Bruno Mars T shirt. And then all fans were quick to point out that just recently they've both been liking each other's posts all the time, so it's like they've recently connected.

Right, right, So that's that's a clue.

That's a clue. I think it's a good possibility that they will release something. And I am so surprised by this. Trump Yeah, he had the chat with Elon Musk and he actually said some really nice things about Kamala Harris. Well, he did because he was asked about her Time magazine cover and he thinks that she looks like the most beautiful actress to ever live, and even compared her to his wife Milania. I was really, really really surprised.

I need to hear it to be able to do all.

Right.

Here, it is a picture of her on Time magazine today.

She looks like the most beautiful actress ever to live.

And actually she looked very much like our great first lady Milania.

She that's right, but of course she's a beautiful woman. So we'll leave it at that.

Well, yeah, guys, now, a lot of people thought Trump had a lisp during that whole two hour thing, or had had dental work done because he she tunk. Listen to him and get played again. Listen to him.

On Time magazine today.

Yeah, she looks like the most she looks like the most beautiful.

What's going on?

What has happened there? Because I watched it. He's on an iPhone and the iPhone's on the table on Trump leaning he thinks you can't just talk normally like this, straight ahead.

Yeah, but even if I look down like this, I don't get a lisp.

No, I don't get a lisp either. But he was sitting in an awkward position the whole two hours.

Even if I don't down there, I can still talk normally.

I don't know who here had braces at one stage.

Well, I pretended to, Oh that's right.

Yeah. I played a joke on you one morning and I said, how long he's going for?

You?

Go on for the next twelve months at least?

And I was like, what the hell?

That was a one And I thought it was all for vanity, and I was just no, it was just for the loss, taking the piss well, see, that's what because people the Kamala Harris team have released lies about Trump, saying they've heard he calls her a bitch behind the scenes. Yeah, and Trump's teams command said he doesn't use that sort of language. He uses language, but he doesn't.

You think this is the counteract to that.

I think it might be a little bit of a And.

Here I am playing right into his hands by playing it.

On air and going comparing it to his wife.

Though that's.

Level wife before he had level.

No one wants to have Carmala.

So all Taylor Swift fans are feeling like karma has finally happened. When it comes to Kanye West after eleven years of give a.

Few fans, no one cares about.

Way what could Well?

This is a direct fu right because Kanye West's last eleven consecutive albums all debut at number one, and this time it was at number two, coming in behind Taylor Swift's album at number one.

She beat him, so it's broken his record. It no longer has that record.

No one cares that people care about these records are international singing superstars. Most of us don't know ship like or we don't like it.

All right, Peter, you ready, your Pedophiles is coming rey to go. We have cracked open the files for another investigation, and the Pedophiles is back.

Peter.

If this isn't worth airing, I'm warning you now, it'll be the end of them.

Okay, I'll promise you I've got an outcome and you will love it.

Okay, what's the focus?

Give us a little anything.

You can't say anything.

I can give you my new tagline I've been working on for the segment. If that, If that got you, I don't find the investigations. The investigations find me.

So this just landed on your lap.

Then this is landed right of my lap.

So you're not giving us any indication of what it's about, just that you'll love it. Is it about someone famous that we know? You know what?

It's about? A staff member among us?

So it's an internal thing.

It is internal which you'll either love or hate.

And what's the subject matter?

Someone hasn't been working as hard as they say? It sounds shit?

Okay, well just give it.

That sounds so lame.

First of all, a lot of people listening don't care about you guys that much. So there's a big chunk of them that would go. I don't know every team member, so I'm not listening for that. You need to give us way better than that stand by coming up.

No, you need to give us better hook that.

Wh team member? Is that the band?

You probably want to fire someone over there? Who is it about? It's Lucky the geek.

Oh, okay, well that Lucky. Are you aware of this? Have you been interviewed by Peter for the Peter Files?

Not anything to do with the Peter Files that I was aware of.

It will be good, maybe it will be good. We'll get it on next everyone.

Jaggio.

The Peter Files.

Good morning, Hello, I talk after that intro. I don't know so. Good morning Australia. Good morning, Ryle and Jackie.

How are you good?

A very good?

Great to be here with another special investigation, which obviously we like to keep an eye.

Don't waste too much time with the bullshit. You've got your little file there you photo ro Har.

But the other one the pedophiles, it's not the for a very different segments.

Yeah, there's a pedophile and then there's the pedophile.

This is the pedophiles.

Absolutely, guys, I have to walk around this workplace, and I think, what are stuff up to? What are they doing behind the scenes, what are they doing after the show hours?

Because that's what we will think about you.

You're the one we wonder about the most.

And obviously, just a moment ago I announced it, Today's Pedophiles was on Locky the Geek.

Yes he's there.

Because the big d so I have my last week I was on medium wedge and this week on the subject of the pedophiles, what were you.

On last week medium watch? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're obsessed with its constantly being investigated Locky.

Because people can't believe you. Yeah, to worry, what is the investigation?

Guys think?

I think lock He's had a lot of airtime in the last probably six months when it comes to own only fans girls going on, you're.

An only fans girl.

So little Brunette not only did he sleep with her, but he made her finish and she taught him how to please a woman orally.

That's right, little Brunette, Battie, I think that's right. And then he went to the Gold Coast and because you went up went up up there and all that.

Sort of left over and the flannelte pajamas and everything.

So a big concern is going is this a real thing? Is this going on? Is heasy?

Oh he's in love with us? Yeah?

Absolutely.

But then last week because Lockie was in the studio and someone spotted a guest in the studio.

And it was Gracie. They called it Grace. Where's Lacey? Also, she's the other Only Fans friends?

Wait, she was in studio with him, hanging out doing something in the Melbourne studio with LOCKI.

Correct, yes, So so that landed then, which begs the question at the end of the.

Day, what are they doing?

What's going on? Are they dating? Are they rooting? Are they starting an only Fans?

Are you throwing it up there? The Grace swears Lace cheek, No, no, you'd want to Is.

He getting more roots than Cooper? John's right? What is going on?

So this is where the people getting more than you at the moment.

Getting anyone could get more than me right now because I'm getting none.

Right now.

For quite some time.

Yeah, guys, this is where the Pedophiles team went into overdrive and we dug.

You're the only person that works on the PEDA files. That's right.

Yeah, So the team was working around the clock really to put this together. And what we found call Jack because when we work in the studios there's audio files and bits and pieces. We've had to go into the deep dark files, and it turns out that Locke has secretly not been doing his job on the show by preparing for segments and bits and pieces that he might have to do. He's about to launch a podcast across Australia and I believe it's called Baddie and the Geek, so he's doing it with the I believe the well in further investigation, to play you guys some audio if you'd like to hear sort of how this this came to light.

When I say that was confidential, there was a phone conversation I had with you early in this working confidence well.

I think you'll find unless you say to an investigative journalist this is the record, they write it.

Did you say that, Locky. No, Because.

We've all been trapped by the journalists before. You're not the only one, You're not the first, you're not the last.

Guys. I think it's really up to you guys to decide where where to take this next. Would you like to hear some of the audience, What are we hearing here? Well, you're going to hear a little sneaky picky.

This has never been broadcast at all, so this is a little snippet of the first episode.

So who is this Lucky.

Not Gracie.

So it turns out that Gracie might be a guest down the track or something like that as well. So let's have a listen to the first little have.

Not launched this podcast, It's never been heard, no, so.

Sources are saying nothing's been planned or out in the public at all, which.

We could probably check it. So it's an ideas are But is this a test run? I believe?

So okay, all right, let's hear it.

Hi, I'm Alisha the Baddie.

Hi, I'm Lucky the Gee, and welcome to.

The Baddie and the Geek podcast.

People were probably wondering how could two people from two such completely different worlds end up doing a podcast together, But the one common thread for both of us is the kind when Jackie I show because you did naked dating.

Yeah that was so much fun and I guess that's how our chatting started from there.

Well, you were hot and you were funny. I can also tell that you just had a really engaging personality and.

Obviously things got pretty spicy between us as well. And I mean teaching you how to eat pussy and you'll have a lot of very happy girls.

If you do that.

Through this podcast, through the guests that we're planning to have on the podcasts, we want to help bring other people out of the shell and inspire people if they are maybe experiencing some mental health challenges to be able to overcome those.

So you're mental as well.

Is it mental health or is it the geeks of the world that can learn a thing or two sexually? Well, both, a bit of both, I think.

But I am shocked that managed to find that audio. I cannot be.

The Dark Archives.

So we have everyone saved their stuff in the systems here which is connected around the country, but they label them different things.

But you go to look back over the.

Sorry giving away, No, no, I would love to know one of the dates and then how long is that? Because I had I just had the feeling that's not because everyone starts a podcast.

Yeah for lock.

I don't mind the idea. I think the idea, I like the name. I think the idea is good. I really love the premise that you're trying to.

Listen to it.

Let the blokes like you losers hot women. That's that's the will.

You be talking about in the podcast, the specific instructions you were given when going down on her to make to let other men know.

Yeah, I reckon that there's a good chance that that will be discussed.

Yeah, okay, and she can Yeah, this is good.

And hang on is Grace wears lace? She guess? And will she lay on the desk and you guys fiddled with her and explained everyone? Is that the plan?

She won't play lying on the desk on one of the episodes that we're doing.

And Gracie was in that. And I've a little piece of next bit.

So when it comes to watching online content, I like watching girls type guys virginity okay, right.

A bit of a niche.

Right now, I can see why that's hot?

Is it?

What do you like about it?

But not so long ago that was name right?

I agree that is.

Really hot because then you're obviously and what I imagine is that you're seeing a really confident woman like that's sexy.

Wow, there you go, right. I think I think he's under something. I think Locke is gold here.

What do you think?

J Yeah, I'm impressed. I think it's good.

Now, obviously the girls audio needs to be improved.

You're in a good studio, They're not Peter good investigating. Thank you, Carly.

Do you want to hear one last little piece? This is a little segment which I didn't mind. I thought there was you guys will enjoy this one.

It's called the in segment lock you packed me up here? Geek speak? I believe it is. I love yeah you.

So we're going to do a couple of other segments in this podcast, and this will be the opportunity for Leisure and myself to both share our expertise in different fields. Welcome to the geek Spake segment, where I provide advice on a range of geeky topics and the subjects for today's topic is public speaking. What do you like at public speaking?

Leisha?

Not my favorite thing to do.

I've always really enjoyed the energy that I get from getting up in front of an audience and talking. For me, it's actually it's a really powerful feeling. If I'm going to give any advice to anybody about public speaking, So what I tell people is that the way that you get yourself in the right mindset. Obviously, it's important to be well prepared and to know what you're guys to be talking about. But tell yourself that this is an opportunity for you to speak to people and tell them something, and the guys been listening to it, so it's a lot for you to convey a particular opinion. Think about the opportunity. Don't think about the fear. Think about as an opportunity. You get to speak people and guys have been listening to what you're saying.

God, if you've got to do all that just to get on stage, you're in the wrong gig.

So when are you going to do this, Luckie?

Well, we've already recorded a couple of episodes and the plan is to launch it within the next couple of weeks.

Are they on a better quality microphone or are you going to have that shit quality?

So I was obviously in a studio and on Lasha was recording by zoom, So we're working on a couple of solutions to that to get her quality to be better.

Well, you can still do it on zoom, but she can record crystal clear at her end, and then you marry it up together in post production. You know what I'm saying.

So she records a separate five with her.

That's what I just said. You get it. You have to repeat everything I say. I get it. Okay, I like that idea. I think it's quite good. What do you think?

Yep, I think it's good.

Peter, I don't know what you expected here. Do you think we'd be angry?

Oh?

Yeah, you actually preface this by saying someone might be fine.

Well, I wasn't sure. I know this on you because now here we are going what a genius idea?

Is it? On the iHeart radio platform and podcast? Locky or Wat's the plan here?

So the plan is that we're going to picture to iHeart Radio.

Yes, I think this is the pitch.

Then, yeah, who do you got to get approval from?

I think it's Corey, the head of the iHeart podcast.

Worry about gry Bro. If you want that on, it's on. I think it's fantastic. Now, obviously you want Corey to give you and get involved because he's got the budgets and stuff. You want to get paid.

Correct and helped with how much you want for it?

Production stuff? I don't know what the going rate is for podcast production.

Would you be charging the same amount as the only fans girls are getting or will you get more because.

You're the Nework here?

Or is he the name? I don't know whether he's more popular in the GEK, but that means nothing.

He famous.

You know that your is an equal pay, So I think that I should be getting whatever unless she gets We should both be getting the same.

That's a wonderful thing to do when you're lucky. That's a gentleman right.

Because I made that mistake twenty five years ago doesn't mean everyone else has to mistake.

Yeah, do you not believe that should be the case?

No, I do believe.

You know, I believe that, Peter, What do you want now?

The Pedophiles teams Alfie did assist me a little bit along the way as well.

Yep, I'm the one that brought it up.

So yeah, thanks for mentioning it.

You feel that maybe with the guests the Gracie girl, you should get a nude there, and like you guys should act out some stuff or do some stuff to It's like.

Practically, you know, podcasts of videos these days.

You don't want to just talk. And by the way, I know you think yourself as a public speaker, but you say too many words. You say like it five times more words than people need to say to get the point across.

Yeah, it's kind of cute, Yes, Peter, I keep putting your hand downe, Peter.

Oh no, just when you've done, we have to play the intro as an outro as well. What the intro of the Peter Files gets played as an outro just to wind up my segment when you guys have done, no rush obviously, no rush obviously when you're ready.

You interrupted what we were talking about to remind me of something that we already know. I'll feel the room next time, Intern Pete. Will Intern Pete be a guest on the podcast?

Lucky Well, I don't know about that.

If you can come up with some sort of persuasive reason why he should be on the podcast, then we'll consider it.

What about me, Lucky Alfie?

Would you put Alfie on there? Gronk in training? By the way, you're not quite a gronk yet, Alphie. No, not yet, Bro, you're teaching me. Yeah.

Actually, I reckon Alfie would be good guests, and I Reckon Pedro would be and I Reckon Brune would be as well.

How about getting guests people actually care about hearing?

Why did you want Pedro on there just because he's got an interesting story about how he got to be the executive producer of the show.

I think you guys should be just honing in on the geek sex stuff. Yeah. I don't think you should be hearing people's backstories.

Everyone does that. You need to be a point of difference.

Andrew g will host the ship. Keep it to pussy and geeks getting laid. Yes, stay in your life.

That's niece and it's good.

It's not out there. You don't know what.

You're not an expert on anything else.

All right, thanks for that advice.

Okay, play out.

The Peter Files.

Thank you, Thank you, Peter, Thank you Peter. We could have done without d the anyway. You got to give these kids a chance, they say, you know, don't be nasty. You know, give kids a chance. They say, how long does that supposed to last?

The chance? Well, Peter's has been going on for over a decade, but.

The government pay half is in subsidized ways.

Easy. Yeah, all right, we're going to do your last calls. Guys, if you want to phone in on thirteen one oh six.

Five Hall thirteen six five to get through today. That's what you're ringing any other day. Margo's called in.

Home, Margot.

Hi, I just wanted to quickly say that I agree with Kyle on the Will Smith's thing.

God Mark, I think god one person agrees with me.

No, I always have since Look, I don't particularly like Jada Pinkersmith to be perfectly honest to hang shit on somebody's physical ailment in front of all those people and whoever else, like on the Telly, that is just unacceptable. That was a really shitty thing to do. And if I was Will Smith, I would.

Have slept him.

Anyone know if Chris Rock even knew that she had alopecia, who.

Cares what he means?

Does it matter?

But yeah, because it was.

It was a g I Jane joke, right, bald head. Nobody knew she had alopecia.

Whose side are you on here?

I'm actually not on Will Smith's side. So I just think I think like, if he knew and he did it as a way to make fun of that ailment, then yeah, okay, fine, that was Yeah, that's what I mean.

But we don't know that he knew that because none of us knew that.

He's going to admit it now.

Is he on the side of caution? And I think he might have known. I don't not like Chris Rock by the way. I think he's hilarious, but you know, yeah, I don't not like.

Him either, But I just think that was a really uneffical and unacceptable way to behave.

You've got to remember, Jackie, Remember when I chased a movie star out of the building. I threatened to bash him to death in front of everyone, in front of all his team, in front of his publicist.

Is man, I threatened all of it.

I threatened, like, fifteen guys, I'll bash you all to death because they made you cry, because it was inappropriate behavior they were doing. Did you enjoy that?

No, I didn't. Made it worse, but I appreciate the protectiveness and the loyalty, no question.

But I didn't strike.

I love you for that. I just threatened, but I hate.

Like, Yeah, I just don't like that. It makes me uncomfortable.

Yeah, well, I couldn't see you crying and being being berated by grown men from America.

Yeah, hey son, thank you, by the way, that's yeah, that's really good.

Moment. Sorry, Sonny Gone.

I just want to say you guys are absolutely hilarious in regards to I've got a slogan for your next new T shirt. Like when you guys were talking about the podcast and Kyle you go, oh, I made that mistake so many years ago about you know, equal pain, and Jackie goes, what what do you mean?

Yes, back in my box. Yeah.

See, I say things that are inappropriate on purpose, and then every now and then slapped back into the box. Unlike not unlike what Will Smith did to Chris Rock.

No, not at all.

But Jackie just had to do a certain tone and you went, oh, okay, here we go, here we go.

Yeah, that's right, and I retreated back into my jack in the box. It's true.

Sign.

Hey Carolina, Hi, what's hi?

Jackie?

Calling to congratulate you on your books.

Amazing there's a book I've read which is coming out in a couple of months. Yeah, and October, October twenty nine. Correct, you can plete aud time.

Yep, that's amazing, well done. I was just driving along yesterday thinking if I could choose to be anyone, I've choose to be you. Seriously, more than an actress or anything. I think that's so well for yourself. Yeah, amazing, amazing.

Oh that's very nice.

And now the mark this.

Morning, that's that's amazing, well done, my god, I love you so much.

That's so kind of you, know what an honor.

And now Jackie, next time you're looking at yourself in the mirror nude and in having the galley yourself and grabbing bits and pieces. Yeah, yeah, stretching this.

I didn't but I accidentally left it in the car and yeah, in the back seat for how long a day or two? Fine?

Fine, did you eat it?

No? I didn't need those days are behind me like that.

She is disgusting that I've got an iron gut.

Tomorrow, Adam Lambert, he's on the show, the new judge on the Voice and a maid of mine. The former head of the common Cero's motorcycle club, j Malcoon. They tried to kill this guy by blowing him up in Greece. He survived. He's coming on. We'll see you tomorrow six am.

Kyle and Jackie O

In 1 playlist(s)

  1. The Kyle & Jackie O Show

    6,334 clip(s)

The Kyle & Jackie O Show

Australia's #1 radio show. Kyle & Jackie O are joined every day by the world's biggest stars on KIIS… 
Social links
Follow podcast
Recent clips
Browse 6,514 clip(s)