The Kyle & Jackie O ShowON THE SHOW TODAY:
- Tradie vs Lady
- Ben Feldman
- Birthday Wheel
- O News
- Australia's Sexiest Voice
- Pop Quiz
- O News
- Tom Grennan
- ABC
- 'Meow' - The Human Dog
Kyle, Jaki, Jackie, The Kyle and Jackie O Sholl Hi, good morning, Hi everyone, Hello Brooklyn jack How you love.
Sitting looking Brooklyn or lit up with his new life. Look, you can see you very clearly.
The Actually there's another light I could turn on too for you.
Well, you light yourself up, baby, like yourself. Don't dull your vibe.
Oh that's nice. It looks like you've got a lamp in there. It's really cozy, kind is yeah, very cute. Hey, speaking of lights, I've got to say, coming to this new building, I've never traveled over the Harbor Bridge before at this time, like I'm.
A chunnel dweller. Yeah, I told you you're wasting your life in that tunnel.
I'm very disappointed that the harm Bridge is not lit up overnight, like it's black and you can't even see.
That you're driving over the Harbor Bridge when you do at.
This time a vivid show every night, well not a.
Vivid show, but it up so you can see it.
Like I can't even see it now when I'm looking out the window, it's it's dark.
Who pays for that, though?
Who pays for everything? The government just kidd for it.
But that that money comes from us.
That's okay. I'm prepared to pay for it, you guys, No, no, what it's the city of Sydney.
We wanted dark, Yes, we wanted dark.
Yes, four in the morning. You want the thing lit up like a Christmas tree?
Well, not like enough so that we can see it. Surely that doesn't cost that much money.
Well you still have the lights? Yeah, yeah, I think they do. I think they do cost a lot of money. About some soular things from Bunning's sort of stuck across the top of it.
That's a good idea. Actually, I wonder if they could do solar lights.
On by four always.
Down.
Yeah, that probably wouldn't work. And then every every year you got to buy new ones because they don't really last, those solar things.
That's true, Okay, fair enough. Today I was doing the walk around my house, right, you know, like the walk, Yes, the walk?
You know what you mean how people get around one foot after the other. But he's walking.
Yeah, but this is the walk from Bondai to Bronzy through.
Well, I'm sorry the rest of us. You need to throw in the name of the suburbs, okay, because every suburb's got the walk they could get confusing.
It was from Clovalley through to Tama Ramas, all through Bronti and Tama That's where I will.
You still have to walk to keep slender? Is that what you do?
I like to walk and listen to music. It's good time out for you know, just you, and.
To dull the dull the mental brain.
And all the stuff I'm trying to heal and work on at the moment in my life.
Can't you just I am?
I think you were not. Really, there's a lot of truth in.
It.
There's a little bit of truth there.
Anyway, you dulled out with thrash metal and you're walking Vondo de bronte.
I'm doing that walk and I'm looking around like usually I'll do it at around three or four, but yesterday I did it a bit later and it was.
Five thirty, six o'clock, six thirty.
And I just every single person that was out had obviously come home from work and was doing their jog for the night. And if you were a tourist visiting, you would just think this city is full of the most good looking people you've ever seen in your life. Every single guy had his top off and was jogging, and every girl had little like bike shorts.
And a little crop and everything running so beautiful and.
Are you running for me of this? Like listen to the asolis that you give this city in your suburb in particular, How up yourself do you have to be to say it would be the most beautiful group of people it is.
I've never seen anything like it. I was just I thought if I was visiting another city, I would think, who are all these people? Why are they all so beautiful?
Like honestly, you should have stopped them and asked them, hey, what do you do? Where are you from? So all the beautiful people are doing that run.
Saying yeah, if you want to like look at beautiful people five thirty six o'clock around Bronti Tamarama on the walk, just watch what happened to walk? Yeah, the Bondai to Bronti do it?
And and how many people are we talking about?
Like is it like a thousands, thousands.
Thousands of good looking people just running around tiny shorts?
Yes, no real show off?
So is it really? Is it really an exercise thing? Or is it like a pussy gathering exercise? So every guy's got their shirt off?
Yeah, every guy has their shirt off.
Now you don't see that round the Bay Run. You don't see everyone posing down on the Bay Run. Peter, did you see any shirt off guys when you were running?
Okay, so not so much of the Bay Run, but shirt running. Sorry, running with your shirt off is so in right now, by the way, because the weather is absolutely perfect for it.
You wouldn't be doing that though.
Surely in the city the other day, chasing seeing if I could raise the trams along now George Street.
So a lot of that's.
A totally different look to what I saw yesterday.
I'm ready to go for somebody us.
A look, this is what I was thinking yesterday.
I haven't got it.
I haven't done it, probably, Peter, Peter, let me tell you you're never going to be Asian.
Just get it, says, isn't it he.
Only eats Asian food. Now he's shaved all his body hair after guys, and he's chasing trams through the city.
I know you're not interested in attracting women, but the shaved chest is like what that was? What was nice yesterday is seeing so many hairy chests, good old fashion. Every guy had hairy chest and I loved it because I hate shaping looking, Pete.
Look, look how the late I read an article that it was in right now, so I did it.
It's on the way out, it's on the way it was in and it's on the way out here.
Did you read that article that a doctor's surgery.
In the article?
It was probably just something that popped into my head, to.
Be honest, Yeah, it looks revolting, just so you know that, you know it's I don't mean to be mean, Peter in any way right when I say this, but I did not see one guy.
That looked like you yesterday.
Not one. Oh thank god, she's not being mean, thank god. So no average or below average. Everyone was beautiful.
What was so bizarre? It was like, oh, you're not allowed in the suburb if you don't have a certain look. That's what it felt like. It felt like that, you know, sure it but anyway, come with it as it was intended.
You know, you're ugly, there's no hair, is disgusting. Once again, I thought of you yesterday, Peter, actually really, because I was out doing an orientation day for Otto's school and there was still some builders now finishing up some last minute things with student number one at his little kindergarten. So I was impressed by that. Kids already numb.
What do you mean student number one?
Oh yeah, first and mission ever like it's never been. This is its first time it's ever opened.
Take care.
I don't know what they call it or like it's I call it school.
Yeah, it's not for when he starts his proper schooling.
Sorry, how do I secause you sit down? No one cares about you anymore, din't you? But what I did was I thought I could smell, remember the old smell of Peter that shirt not quite dry, but you've worn it all day? That reek, right, that stink. I smelled it yesterday while I was wandering around the school, and I thought, and I thought, she wondered if this lady is it's maybe she stinks because everywhere I went, and I thought, maybe it's some of the builders, they think, And then when I got in the car, I realized it was me my shirt. I was horrified.
Did you have the wet smell, the damp yell.
That old pete damp when you know it's sweating in it.
Yeah, that is honestly one of the worst smells when you smell that on yourself, like you know that top has been crumpled up, damp and then it's dry. Yeah, it's just horrible, isn't it.
So I spoke to our our Asian here who told me, yeah, no, do I have no work today? And I went dry, it doesn't work today, not for today. I'm like, yeah, so it just doesn't work today? Like have you emptied in no work today? Just keep yelling out the same thing.
I don't understand it. It sounds like you eat a new dry or if someone needs to come and fix it.
Yeah, I've ordered a new one. So and let me say I've ordered it from Binglee, who's no fan of mine.
No, you don't know why and advertise with us.
They know they won't. That's fine, listen you. If you want to put all your eggs in the basket with the that's fine. But anyway, I'm not a petty person. So I've bought the Binglee because they bring it around and install it so I don't have to carry around. I can't go down and they're pulling out all that shit?
Are they the only ones that do that?
I think they installed it the next day. Yeah, they install the next They bring around and stall the next day and take the old shitter away. And I don't know what they just sell it.
That is marketing, Yeah, exactly. They're hard to get rid of, trying to get rid of a dryer. You can't give them away, even on gum Tree.
Who wants it?
I guess you're right. Who does want it? Yesterday when I was on the walk, I reckon I had a bit of a missed connection moment. Really the guy, Yeah, do.
You want to put the call out now?
No shirt off? Your shirt off?
Going no, Actually he didn't have his shirt off.
He was there with a friend and I was coming up the stairs, like you know, there's stairs on this walk, by the way, all right, And I was as I reached the top of the stairs, he was coming towards me, and we locked eyes and smiled at each other. That in itself is rare, by the way, when you smile at another person.
Your fameous, your stupid lady.
It wasn't that. It was you know, you know when I can just tell when it's a oh I recognize you versus hey, I'd.
Get burying myself up to the balls and you there's a difference in the look because.
There is a little bit of a difference, so I think I can spot the difference. Anyway, I thought, oh, he was so nice looking, and he seemed really nice. So I thought it seemed really nice. Nice eyes, brook nice eyes, you can.
I thought of help, Oh what a nice fellow.
Anyway, as I was walking, I thought, I'm just going to look back, right, So I looked back, and he was going down the stairs. As I looked back, and he looked.
You didn't get caught desperate.
That's what you.
Want, know, you want them both to look back.
This isn't an Eston Cultcher movie. This is real life.
This felt like an Ashed and quitch A movie. So I looked back. He looked back as he was walking down the stairs, and I kept walking and I thought, I'm going to look back one more time, but he'll be gone now because he's down the stairs.
And when I looked back the third time.
He walk out.
No, he had walked to the top, back to the top of the stairs, and he waited there and looked at me. What did you do, oh, Brooklyn. In that moment, I felt too scared to go back over because I thought, what am I going to do? Walk back over.
And go run into his arms and leaped into his arms and giving him a passionate kiss. And right now he should be ringing up saying I won't be able to come in today's Mama's dry and raw and just absolutely being thrashed.
Yeah I know. So as I look back and he was waiting there at the top of the stairs, looking she walked away. I waved at him. I smiled in my mind. Wait, does that look like sea or does that just look like hey?
It sort of feels like you think your princess Catherine, Like you turn around, you give a generic wave to the crowd, and then.
You disappear, take a cute wave and then I sort of kept.
Showed me the wave, showed what the fingers were doing.
Okay, it was like this, Oh, we.
Got the whole dramatizer, and did you have to walk off? What the hell's that?
What do you mean?
It was like, so you held your hand up like you were saying stop, and then just wiggled your little fingers in a cute little witch yea twinkled. What do you think of that? Problem? Is that? Sexy?
Know?
I don't you wearing so this is the thing? Like I was wearing the worst thing possible, and I even said. I came home and I was talking to Mum and I said, I, mam, a cute little you ring your mother about sring my mother about that?
Did your mother?
I swear to god, I didn't. She'd been asking for the last two days, are you calling today? Are you calling today? So I had a plan to call her at seven o'clock and just in conversation, wasn't the first thing I mentioned. But I said to her, Oh, this really cute thing happened on the walk today. And I told her, and she goes, what were you wearing? And I said, well, that's the thing She said she was as well. I said, well that's the thing I was wearing, like the worst thing possible, my birken stocks, a trapsuit, pants, a T shirt, no makeup, and a bucket hat. I said I was. And she goes, oh, it's a wonder He even stopped and I Jesus, and she say that, she just said, it's a wondering. He even looked at you, and I said, there, maybe he was picking up on my good energy. Maybe I have good energy.
Know you. That's what mums are into talking about energy. They don't know about that ship. Yeah, anyway, she charms only know how to dress up and shake it for the fellas back in the old day.
Yeah, yeah, so yes, I was wearing no makeup and a bucket hat, and I was like, yeah.
You know, if he looked at you like that, and I mean the the blank.
Canvas, yeah, the blank canvas, maybe.
He is the special one.
Well that was a missed connection. Yeah, what his name was?
Did the friend who was with come up the stairs as well?
At that point?
He kind of. I didn't see the friend come back up.
It was just him.
What he doing, Jackie? That's that's the How old is this?
What is his numbers?
Tell me what he looks like? Explained?
Describe it wearing a cap like I think a sort of beigey baseball.
We care about the cap.
Human being, dark hair, nice eyes, good look. Probably probably about six foot I'd say six foot one. His friend was shorter than him.
And he had he had no shirt on as well.
No, he had his shirt on. I think it was a black T shirt. I think maybe shorts.
You can't tell, so you was even good looking if you can't even say what color shirt he had on?
Well, I was looking at his face. And eyes. That's all I clocked.
Really, could we get a sketch artist to come in?
And I don't think so. I don't think I could tell you exactly what he look like.
So how do you know this is the misconnection of your own don't.
I'm not saying I just missed the man in my dreams.
I'm just explaining that something cute happened on the walk yesterday. It's fine, like, let it go. But you know, I'm just saying it was a cute moment. I never have shit like that happened to me. You know, like where someone walks back and waits for you. It's so romantic.
You know, it probably happened. He probably went to He probably had a little routine where he goes to run halfway and the seats and then runs back up and then takes a couple of breaths, takes a couple of breasts, and then you've turned around and going yeah hey, Then he goes, he goes. Guess what braidon? That bitch waved at me? Who does she think she is? I think that's that old.
He's probably gay. You're right, I.
Reach she understands the walls to suck down one stick. Yeah. See, the fantasy really implodes when someone with some sense looks down at it.
It could be totally different. That's scenario to what it is in my head right now.
That's so true. It could be or it could be exactly what you said.
It could be who knows, Hey, pres Alphie wanted to talk to us, but so I don't actually know why.
So on Alfie, you guys, give me one second.
Coming in. Alfie is our little coffee making He's a great He's a little gronk from the area. We love Alfie. We've adopted him almost, you know, put him under our wing. Yeah, get up on the mic. Close, bro, if you want to talk, everyone's going to hear you.
Perfect, So you know what's up. I love the show so much. I want to spend the rest of my life here.
Never the rest of your life here.
He's in for life.
Someone else I want to produce?
Yeah, you want to be producing?
You're a hang on hand, hands up? Who else is a lifer in the producing room? There's Peter that's a life of very hands up now very slowly raised his hand, Pedro, you see that he's on the fence's.
Kid, are you guys?
You're not all lifers, no way.
I mean, you're not going to race off somewhere else. Remember when Palestine defected over to Sunrise, that ship definitely life. I was just waiting for the for you to finish your sentence because I wasn't sure where it was going to go. But yeah, my hands on jeez, that's very impressive. So you OUTFA So you're a lifer.
Well, lately I've been watching a lot of gangster rap and I always see tattoos on them and about telling them all about their lives, all about their lifestyle.
Don't tell me you went and got a Kyle and Jack your logo. No you didn't, I hope not. Take up second, you're taking your shirt off. Okay, oh my god, no ship. What is that? The neck taps fresh?
It hurts?
Oh you got a nect to do? What is that?
So it's got?
I got my coffee cups because that's my favorite part of my job. And I was seeing you guys smile.
There styrofoam cups around your nee.
Yep, that's right, And they don't look like it's done in an artful way. It looks actually quite cool.
Had sick? Yeah, have had like five.
Hundred big on neck tats. But that looks good.
Look I didn't even shave.
To j what's the number there? What's that number?
So it's my post code to where I live.
Where do you live Maryland?
Yeah?
Are?
Oh and you've got kJ a little caj in the middle.
Of the crown for King Kyle.
Oh my god.
The yacht because that was my best time in my life.
My bow party.
I met Johnny in My Hero He is the best time of your life?
Was it?
Yes?
Fun?
And then Kyle, I got your Bentley cuz because remember.
Looks in and amongst all the artwork.
Yeah, because remember the time I'm selling that.
Yeah, I've got a blow job. That was like the best part of my life too. And I couldn't put my Masda in there because it looks ship.
But you got blown in a Mazda in real life, but in your mind you were getting blown in the Bentley.
Yeah, because that's my favorite car from yours, the collecture. The Bentley is my favorite.
Bro.
You got this done yesterday.
He's got all the wings grown around his He looks like a hard pricked Now.
Why I got to say, Alfie, it does make you look like a lot harder and.
Cooler walking in the streets, and everyone did not take one look at me.
Scared did they hang on?
They didn't look at you.
Yeah, like they looked them at me, and they looked very opposite to what Jackie is doing over at the beach walks where everyone's looking at each other.
Yeah, so you guys are avoiding on eye contact at Maryland's.
Yeah, don't look at me and I don't look at them.
Yeah.
Yeah.
See how do you date in Maryland? How does the dating work?
It's hard because then you've got to meet the family on the first date, and you've got to go he causin because that's how they are.
They're all very traditional over there.
So if you meet a woman, you've got to then go and meet her family before you go out and.
Knock on the door and walk in.
You meet her cousins and brothers, sisters, name and everyone.
The brothers lean on you, the other brothers like here we go, another gronk trying to day.
Down because everyone's tore than me. It's I'm not really intimidating. Now I got this sicko.
They want to do sh He does look pretty good with the singler because if he was sitting there on a single without the tatoo, he'd look like a young boy.
That's right, You're actually right. He would look like a young boy right now, wouldn't he with this singleer?
Ye?
Yeah yeah, And now you look like you're part of like a Mexican gang or something in a movie you.
Get narrow it down to a particular race. But I do agree if you wore long, long white socks and shorts and him like, you would be fully Mexican.
Joe.
He looks at one of my cousins in Uruguay.
Now, yeah, yeah, wow, that's one of your cousins.
Yeah, but you've got to learn how to do that hacky sack thing too, you know how they kicked that little.
Oh yeah sack of Hey.
One question, though, is it normal to get a neck tat before you get any other tats on your body? Like that seems like you're jumping into the deep end of tattoos.
Because you know, I'm always living, I'm living at home and my dad never lets me do anything. So you know what, Ever, since I worked on the show, yeah, I want to do everything.
Now, So you're gonna get more?
Yeah, I'm thinking about getting more Tatsma his name or maybe your name to it depends how I feel.
And then and then what did your parents say about this necktat?
That wasn't happy?
Swearing at me as mate, how can you live in this house?
Threatened? Threatened your your your safety? Yeah?
He did, was actually scared. I went to bed at nine o'clock last night.
Oh you're such a hard as with that. Nextat, Albie, that's huge, He's like, I'm walking like a hard mother. What's going to be, Alb. You've got to live the life of this necktat all right, You've got to live it.
You can't just pretending some wild ship now.
I can't wait.
Actually the city are you going to do?
I don't know. I don't know whatever. Le lends me to have no idea.
Bring up and suggests the wild ship out, get up to everybody.
His new necklife, like what is that? What does it look like?
What is nextlife? I love the name that.
That's good.
You're not it's necklife.
Now.
We should put you in different suburbs, and you should approach people and see different suburbs. Except the neck tattoo.
A good idea. That's a great idea.
How do you think that'll go down over it. Mossman and places like that.
I don't know, imagine, No, it would be to me because we're different clothes. When I go to like the Eastern suburbs, everyone's like, looks like I'm to steal something or jump them or something like that.
Now we have heaps and neck tattoos in the East, Yes.
But they're not they're not suburbs. They're not postcodes and stuff like that.
It's like, yeah, true, true, maybe little.
Edge sheering looking pretty little, yes, And then there's there's there's a lot of bikes to Jackie. Jackie finds the bad boy so hot, but she knows she can get of this place. She knows.
Yeah, steer clear. Yeah, I know it's trouble. That's trouble with the capital.
To congratulations and real for.
Another two years.
I kind of like it. Yeah, you're gonna get so you get arms done there.
I'm want to get my arms done. I don't know, it depends how I feel. My mom's name not my dad's name, because he's just yeah, you're scared of him. Yeah, I'm not going to do it.
Every thought coming out of his mouth, you're punishing him, doesn't deserve it, Brooklyn. Would you get a neck tab Brooklyn? No, I couldn't get no, Brooklyn.
No, No, Brooklyn's got his one.
You've got one.
Tat right, drug tattoo in Thailand?
Either way? Yeah, yeah, either way, that's right.
Would you ever get like a ruler down the side of your throat, Brooklyn, like you know, the centimeters down the side, and then then have a lot like have a red line on the side of the face, like red line there like this deep.
Yeah, that's right, Like as you're growing at home your market on the on the.
I've been doing that on the back of the grandfather clock because that's something we can't around for you. So I've actually done it watter.
That's a better idea, a good idea, rather than the wall because you have to leave that behind.
Yeah. It never looks good when you know, you go over to your MoMA's place and there's all these bits of all bits of lead pencil all up and down in an architrave.
Yeah, that's right.
It's different people's names written on it.
It's crazy, all right, Alphie, thank you. We're going to do Trady verse lady. If you guys want to play, we have got tickets for you and three friends to the Sydney Royal Easter Show, which starts March twenty two. Purchase tickets and save at Easter Show dot com dot au.
But they're free this morning if you win.
Okay, Beyonce kicking things off this morning, Texas holding this little country things. You can do the whole the whole album in Country. I love it and she's going to live the life of a country chief for a while. Sunny today, thirty degrees city, thirty three on the west, Keep your hat in your chaps, head off back home. It's Beyonce, Texas. Hold them here and kiss ladies and gentlemen. I want to start to say. Okay, trades verse ladies. Trade is on nineteen, ladies out in front on twenty one. Bit disappointing, We'll try. Patrick is playing for the traders this morning. Good morning, sir, gooday, guys, good morning.
Here you hey sharing a good morning morning.
Oh yeah. So he works in construction doing structural reinforcement. Drives around the beat up old vs. Comodore, but what a machine. It's happily married with a four year old daughter. His favorite sex edition is Doggie Style. He and his wife love having sex out in public on the sneak. So they once did it in a in a kitchen in London, They once rooted in a Russian nightclub overseas. What's the fascination?
Keeping it alive?
Is that what you're doing?
Bro?
Just keeping it keeping it fresh. We'll try to do.
Yeah, mate, Look, when your relationships young and fun, you seem to do a lot lot more outside.
Doesn't keeping interesting?
Yeah?
But how long have you guys been together for?
Now? Oh? Are you?
And you're still doing.
That stuff when we get a chance to so hard.
When you say you had sex in a kitchen in London? Like, who's kitchen?
I was working in a kitchen in London.
I met my wife over in London, and.
Yeah, so you smashed in amongst all the food. You just popped her up on the bench there and tat tat tat in the dry store, oh dry store area?
Fair enough? Fair enough.
I've had sex in a walk in chiller before. Have you had that taking the walk in fridge?
I haven't. I don't know that. I would love that because I don't want to be cold when I'm having sex.
God, you've got all these these little blockades.
Yeah, like I mean, it's fine to do it, but I just don't.
We didn't plan Hey, let's meet in the fridge. We didn't meet. It wasn't a planned thing. Yeah, weighing it at one hundred and twenty five. Since he loves the nightclub sex in Russia, let's call him Vladimir. Put it in Patrick.
That.
I bet you the real Vladimir. I bet you he's definitely used that before. Vladimir in in your mouth.
Now we'll die, okay.
Sheridan works as a sales rep for Kimberly Clark. What is Kimberly Clark? Are they shoes?
No?
No?
No?
Oh yes. So what I do is you know your Hugi.
Nappins, you your sentries.
All the baby stuff.
Yeah, yeah, absolutely all. That's tough.
A sales rep. No one's ever come around here and try to sell me Bold Nappis and Nappis, Like, no one's.
Who are you going around and selling that to?
I suppose Yeah, yeah.
A lot of the corporate world.
We have a massive team.
Yeah.
Do you love your job?
I do.
I love all the people. I love everybody there yet, Oh good on.
Your shirt, and I love hearing that.
She's even nice when you're working with a bunch of people and everyone sort of gets on it. It's almost a bit social as well as work. That's that's the best.
Absolutely.
So.
You've been married seventeen years, you have two kids, and your favorite sex position is doggie.
Yes, yeah, I.
Wish, I wish that. I really enjoyed doggie. I'm jealous of everyone that's loving you.
When she issues with it.
It feels uncomfortable to me.
You know, it just does how are you doing it? Like maybe maybe you're doing it all wrong? No, it just shows the position.
O god, I think we all know the position. It's just what are you.
On all fours? You bent over alone? What's going on?
It doesn't matter whether I'm bent over on all fours. It just is like a little bent in half? Yeah, that too, can't do it. It's like it's uncomfortable.
I got to love the bent in half where they you treat them like a four piece of paper. Yeah, yeah, just fold them in half and just enter from and then you just go for it.
Her and a husband love having sex in the disabled toilet at the supermarket. They do it every Sunday.
Is there a line of will in the husband? O? Cat? That's always good.
Every Sunday, if you know, the local food shop. And we tend to sneak out of the house and we give each other the wink and yeah, we follow each other into the disabled toilet.
Now is it just is it just? Is it just doggie style? Or are you sitting on the toilet? Are you blowing there?
No?
Sitting absolutely deep, doggy, hard and far.
In and out.
So just just the penetration, no, nothing else.
Just get in there, get done and things are coming.
And do you do it like again?
Like does he do you from behind while you're looking in the mirror at him? That kind of thing?
Yes?
Sometimes, yep, absolutely, that's hard.
Hey do you hang on to the safety rails in there as well because they're quite handy.
Oh, they are very handy.
I think we should install one at home.
I agree, I think every shower sa.
Alrighty, we're weighing in at sixty kilos. Forget the wheelchairs. Pull my hair, it's Sheridan, everybody, let's do it, guys. Do you want to go first chair?
Okay, here we go, Patrick, good luck. Jackie's going to find some questions your way.
Okay, what type of makeup brush is typically used for applying eyeshadow.
There's a name for this brush.
What type of brush? Is it.
A brush?
It's called a blending brush, a blending blending yep.
Okay. Question number two makes sense. How often should you breastfeed your baby? Now you've got a four year old daughter, so you should know this, But how I think a bottle?
Yeah?
Every two to four hours.
Wow, that's something we won't forget, right, bro? That first year, isn't it? Hell? That first year, you're like, the year goes past so quick you don't even realize you've you've spent a year with this little baby. That's true, and not the fun way, the horrible.
Okay. Question number three? What is coconut oil pulling? Coconut oil pulling? What is that?
Yeah?
Does a draw color out of your hair?
No? No, but you know what, it's on the right path here is it? Because I've owned a coconut oil and coconut water company, but I'm pretty sure coconut oil you can just swill it around your mouth and it pulls the toxins out. Is that own?
It's like it's an alternate to flop flossing, So you swish it around and yeah, it's the same as flossing.
It's called coconut oil pulling.
Yeah is it?
Wow? And you know what, Coconut oil is also good for you know, if you're a bit dry downstairs?
Oh right, okay.
Rather than the baby oil and all that sort of the lube and everything. Yeah, yeah, Well I spend twelve dollars on some sex shop lube when you can spend two dollars on a big, huge, industrial sized coconut oil jar.
Exactly.
Just don't leave it next to the bed. Ladies, don't get lazy because blokes realize that jar's half empty. They're not the first guy to be in here.
See, coconut oil is great for everything. Like even I like smother it all in my hair, do you, Yeah, Like, if I've got a day free, I'll smother at all lather.
If you had a day free in the last forty.
Can But I have done it recently and you just let it sit there all day?
So what's do? Just treat message.
It's a good treatment for the hair to repair it.
So that's a hack, is it? So instead of the expensive treatments, Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, I mean still get your good serums and stuff, but this is really good for like an intensive kind of tree.
I heard mayonnaise. Some people put mayonnaise in their hair. Is that real?
Oh?
I haven't heard that.
Actually, maybe think yeah, I wouldn't do that.
I wouldn't recommend.
Okay, let's move over to Sheridan. You're ready for your questions?
Yes?
Yeah, but they get too excited. Question one? What happens when the drive shaft goes out on your car? What happens you're driving along the drive shaft goes out? What happens next?
You have?
No?
No, that's wrong. You lose power to your wheels. I understand you thought steering drive shaft.
Wouldn't they in hand? You don't think?
No drive shaft powers the wheels to go around that? Steering wheels is the direction? Okay, chicks? Question two? What breed of fish are you likely to find? If you're looking into a Japanese garden pond? What's going to.
A Yes?
Yes, well done. I thought only a Japanese girl would get that.
Nah, we know that.
That's my question three? And beautiful fish? Aren't they huge? Question three? True or false? A stud finder can locate live wires? A stud finder can locate live wires. No, it's true.
It's a tiebreaker.
Well done.
Oh god, Here we go back.
In play Brasi. Here we go, playing obviously for tickets for you and three friends to the Sydney Royal East to show that's what's on offer. First in with the right answer wins.
Good luck.
Here we go. What animal is on the dollar ossie coin?
Oh?
She got it? You know why? Because women they're always looking for those dollar coins to put in the washing machine down the laundromat. And blokes, we just deal with the We just deal with the folding. That's what we do. I get it. Not the folding of the clothes, the folding money. You've got to get your three friends raw least to show the rest of you can buy tickets at Easter show dot com dot. Are you well done, honey, enjoy have fun there.
Thanks Sonny, Thanks Patrick, Sorry you didn't win.
Yeah, he's like Ben Feldman's coming in. Have a check out this blo it's got po sorry, population eleven. It's streaming on stand. Great news show. I'm always looking for a new Telly. We'll get this guy. You find out what's this show all about? Next to kids Jaggio, I'm Ben Feldman kind have seen Ben is American actor What is about forty on? The good looking fellow Jackie is sitting in the chair there. I love this bloke from the TV show Superstore. It's sort of like, you know, that same sort of comedy thing as The Office It's been I love that show. All a bunch of weidos working inside the big department store. It's Leida. What would you it is? It's like a cam our equivalent? Is a camart to target a costco?
Kind of?
Yeah?
Yeah, same sort of thing, right? And then also mad Men? You've been on mad Men? Right, So welcome to the country. I mean you've been here filming for this stand nut here?
Yeah, I was in Northwest Australia, which is very different than here.
Yeah.
So okay, so tell me about that, because I know Stan kind of wooed you to do this show and they kind of really turned it on for you.
What happened? Yeah? What have you heard?
What turned it on for me?
I heard they turned it on for you, like you know, it took you to the nicest restaurant, put you up in the great hotel overlooking the harbor, and like come here and film here. Wouldn't this be great.
It was a little play action.
It was.
It was a mislead.
It was a miss lead because you're like, yeah, I'm going to come here. This is amazing this place.
So was the was the offer, like look at what a wonderful country to live in for months to the time, and look at all the vastness and the beauty. It was that Australia is.
It was kind of no shade on where I actually ultimately ended up. But when I when I landed, I landed here in Sydney. I had to have views like you guys have from.
The studio and gorgeous, gorgeous city.
Gorgeous city. Took a beautiful boat out to a beautiful, fancy restaurant, and then I flew on like thirty different airplanes over to the other side of the country and ultimately where I went Derby, which is an incredible town. But like, there's no there's not a stop sign, I ate, there's nothing.
There's no hotel. There's a one star hotel.
That isy, there's there's a bunch of great people and a bunch of animals that want to murder you.
Yes, yes, yes, it was two different.
It's a different thing here.
So no harbor, no boats that you were on location filming this sary fisherman.
There were mud mud grabbers, yeah.
Was there and and what like how long were you there? For?
Three months?
And it was a place called Derby, Derby, Derby, I never heard of.
That, you know, Broom. Yeah, okay, so you drive to Broom in like two and a half three hours from Derby.
Oh my god, in the.
Middle or nowhere.
I mean, well that's what I thought.
I was originally told that we were going to shoot in Broom, and I was like, wow, that's nowhere. And now when we got to Derby, Broom was like Venice somewhere.
Yes, exactly, brooms like utopia thriving.
Broom because they had movie theaters.
So you got to you guys, actors, like we just see you on the red carpet and the big you know, Mary Claire interviews and the GQUS and me think, look at these bastards just pretending their whole life, what a wonderful But they don't realize for three months you're living in the desert in what can only be described is a caravan with no wheels. Yeah, in that insane heat, learning the scripts, making a movie bad.
Yeah, then I come here and my faces all over the billboards and I got into a restaurant last night that I didn't have a reservation.
For the act.
Yeah, the act.
Fine.
So this this, this is a Population eleven, which is now streaming only on stan It's about being in a place where the population is eleven.
Yeah, it's a it's a it's about a It's hard. I don't want to give too much of it away because every episode is there's twists and spoilers all over it. I was even nervous when they put the trailer out because there's spoilers in that. Yeah, but it's a murder mystery, it's a who done it? It's yeah, it's all of it. It's all the things. It's there's there's horror, there's comedy, there's kind of meat cutie kind of stuff going on there, and a lot of misleads and twists and turns.
It's it's good part of the eleven or are you the twelfth?
Who's sitting about twelve? Well?
The sign, like the artwork for it is like the crossed out twelve and added eleven lose one at the beginning of the show, right, which is what sets off the whole mystery.
Well, you've ruined it now watching it.
You could skip it. I'm sure there's other shows on Stan you guys can watch it instead.
Yeah, we are understand quite a lot, but I love New TVs. Now, is this going to be a one a week thing or they jumping them all out for a kid binge watch?
You could watch it all right now, you could. I mean, once everyone's done this and into this show, you could. You could just pull it up and watch the whole thing.
So then, now are you jumped to the next project and currently working on something else?
I'm currently shooting something. They we carved a week into my schedule. I'm shooting in New Orleans right now. My family hates me because I've not been home.
You're home because in.
New Orleans right when you're sitting here and see how's this happening, it's going straight to that. Yeah.
We carved out a week in my schedule so that I could come here and do press for the show, and I fly back on tomorrow. Tomorrow, I fly back tomorrow, and then on Monday morning, I'm first up.
You know, there's some problems in New Orleans this morning. You may not know this but I think going back there, you should be well aware of, okay, some of the under shit that's going on there. So apparently the police headquarters in New Orleans was built in nineteen sixty eight and was a piece of shit from the start. But now the Superintendent's come out saying that all the rats are eating all the evidence. You mainly searching for marijuana in the evidence room. The rats are addicted to the weied.
The rats are all high.
The rats are wasted there, big fat wasted rats. Why you got to legalize it, guys, That's what I said. I agree, what a waste of time. And then all by the time everyone goes to court, they pulled the box out. Oh the rats eating all the evidence. It just gets thrown out.
The rats are just eating Dorito's somewhere on a couch.
It's amazing.
Yeah, I get it. It is could use some work in New Orleans. I think I think all New Orleanians would agree with that, because what's wrong.
Didn't Brad didn't didn't Brand and Angelina fix all that ship go down there and with all the kids.
Oh yeah, you know, they probably pumped some money into the economy, but not that much.
But it is.
I will say this for anybody that I'm talking Ozzie's all the time about places to visit when you go to the States, and to me, that place, that city is one of the absolute greatest parts of America.
Yeah, that blog lives there, you know that. That Like I hate to can't stand this mask.
Believable best, how do you harnt like?
Because I get it. But if you're gluten intolerant, you like bread, you can't have it in your in your lits, So Harry, it gives you like diarrhea. Yes, actually, because I'm a judge on Australian Idol here and we had we made the mistake last year of bringing Harry on as one of the what a disaster the state. The guy wouldn't take any advice, He didn't want to know anything about any contestant. He wanted to deal with his way, and that way is made more difficult to cut up a television program.
It did' end up working at people like him.
They got rid of me, got rid of him, and we've got a new new.
We spoke to Harry over the phone recently and he actually.
Came and did this show with all of this ship.
Yeah, yeah, even though he's aware that Kyl says these things, but he was actually the nicest guy.
Really.
When we spoke to him, we were all like, oh, wow, we feel bad because he's just lovely.
That a way to way to have my back, What a way to have my back? Twenty five years we worked Onposite each other said the same thing.
You were like, oh, he's so nice.
Like really, Ben, You know when you think someone hates you and then you start shipping away at them behind, like yeah, excessively. He's trying to just undermine anything that they want to do or think, and then you realize, oh, no, they don't hate you at all. It's been a huge mistake. Yes, yeah, this is You've got to lock into the hate I feel you can't go back as a man.
You're right, And what you described is why I just lay awake at night.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And actors are a strange bunch. Are you? Are you married? Your kids? What? Your married? Soon? I have kids? Yeah? Well done?
My wife is here?
My wife.
This this this is not just about me doing press for this show in Sydney. It's an apology tour for my wife because she was stuck with two little kids. The entire time I shot Population eleven, Cay.
Do you feel bad?
I did. I genuinely did, as much as I want to say it was it was paradise. It was I was guilty and sad the entire time. And so now she's here, and so I'm doing I'm getting up at the crack of dawn to talk to you guys. And she's she's getting massages, she's getting facials. I met her yesterday in Paddington and and and just she immediately handed me like thirty bags.
I love it. She's on the cocaine straight away and yeah, yeah, she's doing that round weed. Yes, do you know? So you've got two kids, so you're doing you're filming Population eleven. You've left her at home with a population of three. Who did it tough? Are you in the desert filming or your wife at home and the kids?
There is zero chance you're going to get me on on on a microphone saying that I had it? Way zero.
These are solid. Where are blokes like this to see Jackie's single? She's got like a.
Long trail, Yeah they are, They are here.
You what's a better city for meeting people? Would you say Sydney? Or Melbourne, Like, which where would you go? If you could just go anywhere?
I would stay in Sydney. I guess Melbourne would be good.
I don't even know what's around, to be honest, like I I've been on some dates and now I've stopped.
You go on dates with fans, like people who listen to the show.
They're the best they put out straight away agin, Yeah, yeah, straight Yeah. I missed that. I was.
I was.
I wasn't recognizable that much when I met my wife, So I completely missed that.
So it was before that.
Yeah.
Yeah, Now locked in a marriage, you can't even take advantage.
Yeah, but I would have been an idiot. I would have been a complete idiot. I would have been here.
How long have you guys been together?
It's like fifteen seventeen years?
Wow?
Wow that is yeah, good for you.
Yeah, that's your dream, Jackie, your dream sitting in front of you there, but with someone else, a decent, hard working, good looking real man. Yeah, they're all gone. I told you you've left. You run too late. Who waits to you know? Ben? How old you reckon? Jackie is? Because let me tell you, that's you're twenty, she's fifty years old. It's old duck really no way nine really? Yeah? Okay, you said like you're eleven.
Sound like I'm eleven.
You know, you go, I'm not. I'm not twelve, I'm eleven. Yeah, you don't say that when you're forty nine.
I'm forty nine and a third.
Do you guys do the apps out here?
What do you do? Yeah?
They've got like tinder hinge.
Did you do your like FIDU?
Is there?
Like the famous person?
All right?
Yeah?
Yeah, yeah we have that.
They didn't allow her jacked. Yeah I didn't believe it was.
Yeah, every girl on radio doesn't get accepted on her abound or not all. Brittany.
We've got a go called Brittany Hockley.
She's on it.
But a lot of the girls in radio don't get on it because they think we're going.
To talk about it on it.
Oh yeah that makes sense.
Yeah.
So anyway, my friend's on Ryan. She said here in Australia, it's pointless being on there because there's no one on.
There right, want to go down on the lighting guy?
Yeah, it's really, really, really tiny. The amount of people on.
The offense to any leading guys out there listening.
Never Let's face it, lading guys are very good, but who wants to suck one of those bookes?
They're a mess, oh man, And that'll be the little tiny piece of ideo that they pull out of this.
And it follows me back to the States.
You didn't say it, though I didn't. They didn't. I'm just not on you, Ben, I'm just sitting here horrifying, horrified.
That's right in the woke world over there are you all in the work? Well, everyone has to pretend that that everything you know that we all think the same.
That I know.
I think I would argue that we're just we're respectful. I mean, I will say this, it's just as easy being funny, like it's it's I know a lot of the pushback is like you can't say anything anymore, so you can't be funny. But I know a lot of funny people who who who can who don't need to offend people.
I've never laughed at happening. That's that's that's I've never laughed anything that wasn't offensive.
You could be offensive, but like I think it's specifically offensive. Like I think if you if you offended me specifically without offending like other people that identify as me.
Yeah, okay, right, we've got Harry Conic.
Jokes come for me.
Yeah, there you go. Harry Connor's exactly.
There's not a people a Harry Conic people out there. It's just a rising.
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Later I'll tell you how we are later on. We've got a woman who identifies as a dog. She's our guest on the show. Yeah, she barks and.
Scratched out overnight. Because we were talking about this Kyle.
We were wondering where she sleeps at night, and Kyle reckons she'd sleep in the bed because sleep in bed, But no, she sleeps in a dog cake.
Guys, do you ever coming? Is she in studio?
No, she's on zoom.
You don't have to walk or no.
I was wondering that does she walk on two legs or is she down on all fours?
She walks on two legs. She's canceled. I want a four legged entrance. If you want a great show stand original series population eleven, Ben Feldman's in it streaming right now and stand the whole lots up there, man, enjoy your holiday junket media slash repairing holiday for your wife. Love it to me. You're big fan of your work man, Thanks for telling me, thanks for having me. Yeah, you're welcome, Ben Feldman. This morning, here and kiss everywhere. Birthday time. Tara Brown today one of the celebrities. She's fifty six. She's obviously a journal Michael Caine, the old actor ninety one today. Billy Crystal is seventy six years old. Albert Einstein, if he was alive, would be one hundred and forty five years old. Wow, I thought he was way older than that.
Yeah, I would have thought that too.
Are you laughing at Brooklyn because we didn't pay attention to school? You're having a little second in the little clinic kids area.
If he was alive today, I mean not possible.
Well, what's the oldest of what do we established was the oldest living human? Again?
I think one hundred eleven or something?
Is it was one hundred and twenty? I did so really, you know, technically he could have died twenty five years ago only.
Yeah, could have? Should have? Would it? But he's dead regardless And today here a lot of people on the phone, but we've chosen to Heidi from Clarendon High Heidi, Happy birthday.
Heid birthday, My beautiful girl. What's happening? What are you doing to day?
Oh?
Well, I think it's all a surprise.
My husband has taken me out for dinner. I thinks I'm hoping so you that okay?
So nice surprise maybe yep.
Yeah.
And then my grandkids are coming to visit me on Saturday.
How old are you? I'm forty four, but.
I do feel like Albert Einstein.
Oh babe, but you've got grandkids.
Geez, when did you you got?
That?
Shocks me? The forty four year old? Come?
What were you when you had your first child?
My only daughter?
She's seven?
When I was seventeen?
Oh wow?
What was that like?
It was weird because back.
Then I think you were showed upon, But now I think.
It's just yeah.
Now now it's acceptable totally. But yeah, that was pretty young.
But I get to live with them, I guess for a little bit longer.
Oh great. Every family's dream to have generational living on top of generation, on top of generation.
We want to get you a very nice prize on our birthday.
Will I don't know which one we're going with, the digital wheel or the actual wheel.
Well we did say yesterday, no one asked you, Heidi, you got no say around here. So Jackie wanted the original wheel bar back because you thought the girls around here all cuddled together like chickens and we're clucking away saying we don't trust the digital wheel. I said, that's ridiculous. Well, what do you mean you don't trust it?
I don't trust that you can't like Okay, so let's say every now and again we put really big prizes on that birthday.
We're like a car.
Like a car, I as the listener would think, if it's digital, it can be rigged, you know, for people to not get the car for a period of time.
That's not but we would never do no.
But I'm saying the listener might think that. You know, there are people out there that might think that. So I say, go back to the original, and it's all talk to that.
I did talk to the program director yesterday and said that we're going to get back to the old wheel in the top, that the girls, none of you girls believe the digital wheels legit, which I found crazy. All the guys that year, whatever.
You know, we believe it, but we just think that people will think it's reaped.
He actually did randomness tests on it, so I know it's not. But I can see what Jackie means because if I was at the casino and there was like a proper table or a digital one, I'd go the proper one. Yeah, so would I Just to be sure.
If girls, you're so funny the way your little minds work in pe brained little brain, but it.
Has been tested.
I want to assure you that, and it is random.
Okay, well let's let's let's put it down to the sound of it as well. I think you don't sound well, I'm coming round to it.
I will say that. Like at first I thought it was ridiculous the sounds, and.
Then and then the program director when I said, we're going back to the original wheel, the old school one, he went on, but the digital one set because he's British. The digital one sounds so good, bouncing around the car, left speaker, right speaker, speaker, front speech. It was really selling around. I don't know. It just sounds nomill here, but should we try it out?
Can you get Hulk and find out has he put the sound in so that it bounces around different speakers?
Getting him?
Now?
Yeah, okay, don't.
You think it's fun when someone comes in and they spin it, and sometimes the spins not good.
I enjoy that.
I don't really feel like we're splitting hairs here with one wheel or the other wheel. Who gives a ratsass what wheel it is?
Ulk?
Did you make the sound of the digital wheels will bounce around speakers in the car.
No, it's just it's not a stereo orset like that.
It just comes through both speakers at the same time.
Okay, so Tony's full of shit.
Tony on the phone, that's the program directors lied to me to keep his little digital See, this is his project. He's spent months on this project.
Okay, that makes sense now, then yeah, let me let's.
Spin the digital wheel. Let's say this isn't an official spin. Let's just spin this bastard and see what everyone thinks. Around and round to go. Everyone's going right up, slowing down. Here we go, landing on the five.
Okay, that's the digital one. Are we going with that today or are we going to know?
I'm no, I'm just saying we're testing it out. It's not real spin. Okay, what do you think of it?
I like the way it ends more than it starts. The sound of it. Yeah, yeah, you're saying.
As I said, we value listeners get given what we say. They don't get to. This is not idle where they get to ring up?
Okay, well okay, let's listen to the O G analog. Way Okay, that sounds so pathetic.
We're down there the school fate or something.
But it doesn't even sound good. Is it just like I did? It sound better in the old building?
No, a the same. It sounds turn that music. Sick and tired of dancing. Now I'm at home because I've got the flu. Why can't I hear anything properly? I know no one. I don't give a ship. I want it fixed immediately. Sounds like I'm talking to someone on another planet. Very hard for me to do my job when I can't hear ship.
Yeah, I haven't.
A birthday's canceled. You're too lippy anyway. It serves yourself right forgetting nothing.
I don't don't what what?
What's number five? Just give it?
Oh cosmetics gift pack valued at three hundred dollars. They are Australians Australia's leading cosmetical brand for this intellectual cosmetics. No, but I should I.
Should have got Well you don't. So let's run a bit late there.
Should we just play her a song? Quickly choose it, and we're done with this. Okay, we're done?
What so?
Really you manipulated me into letting her have everything he wants after I said she's kids.
Well, we got to play one song, you know, like, let's just quickly play.
I shouldn't blame it. I shouldn't blame my annoyance at Heidi. She's got nothing to do with well a little bit because she kept going, yeah, I reckon, Well, Jackie wreckon gives a ship? What you think?
Okay, here's our song.
It's the carryover one. It's dude, Jimi, Well, that's.
That's ours. Brooklyn's got a brand new one.
I do DJ Snake the Middle one of my favorite songs, unbelievable.
For You'll be happy either way, Kyle look at it like not necessarily?
Heidi? Which do you like? Honey?
Look?
Because I love you guys.
I'm going with Kyle and Jackie.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Isn't that wonderful news today? How good's Heidi?
Yeah? You're better than I initially gave her credit for. I feel maybe I was doing halsh on her for what new building? Enough of the new building? Or stop congratulatings like congratulating me whilst I'm still in someone having sex. Wait till we've finished. Then we congratulated ten years time.
Yes, the congratulations.
Do you know how much I get congratulated, Brooke? And it becomes a little much, Okay, Congratulations on the wedding, Congratulations on the baby, Congratulations on the world breaking radio contract deals, congratulations on the news studio. Leave me alone. I'm not interested in being congratulated. I'm sick of it.
Do people come up to you and say congratulations and you go, what for which?
Why?
I do what?
Four now? And I've always got a bit attitude about it too, And they think, oh you can tell. They're like, he's not happy.
About it, cranky, but you know if you're forever.
And imagine it's been like he in thought when he won that gold, every weary wargul it gets too much, No wonder the guy turned gay just to get rid of half the population, just to be left alone. DJ Snake Middle She's chosen it.
She chose us, and I just want to say congratulations being chosen for the birthday for cangulations.
Thank you and also congratulations to you as well. So it's jud Jamont is the one that's not this.
We got shows and thanks.
She's hung up what a don't even send the price in wear Eno.
Get here we see a stormous cous in.
Printzen it bes game, don't seals and we dance with the devil.
You went by to a world's coast where spend time on highways and.
Never hold.
Hold, don't selms, and we dance with the devil. You wing by to a world so courts se time on the way.
Never hold.
We're running for the red lights. Now it's no way.
The veg is gone.
According second almost golf Fritsen is wearing loves that whist we you can take it back its.
People across the bad. I see storms cos I read a books. No Wedd's way, the devil you about sore heads ways and never.
Siel books know we Dud's way the devil you.
About, So.
Says yo.
Jud Jumond. This morning here at kiss it's bit sunny today thirty around the city, thirty three in the west. Jackie has got some own news, all thanks to glowbird energy. What's happening to Jack.
Now, Celebrity Big Brother in the UK has only been good because of Sharon Osbourne spilling the beans on and her thoughts on celebrities that she knows.
So what it's a bit duller than her.
Oh, she just brings like the good stuff with when it comes to the boss. Because she's had to go with James Corden being such a name dropper and a poser. She's had to go at Simon cow for being a fake. Now it's Adele's turn. Adele people, she's turned on her because she says, Oh, this whole I'm so relatable thing is an act and she needs to drop it because she's not sorry. I actually sorry, that was my mistake. I kind of my hand looked like it was pointing at you thing and.
Sorry, what's happened?
When I want the grab play the sound bite played, I point a thing and I was animatedly with my friendly Well it's like a boom, you.
Know, it's a nice it's like a direction direction. Yeah, so what happened?
Then?
You were becoming Italian with your hands and he just said firing off. Every time your hand would move cod fire it off.
I've noticed lately a different very very animated with my hands, like I've been doing this and this. You can't. Yeah, I'm doing that. I don't know what's happened to me. It's very very animated.
Come Italian, Yeah I have. Maybe you've just become old. When old people they they're not noticeable, so you have to swing your arms around. Definitely not that, Kyle. It's not that.
I don't know what it is.
But anyway, so yeah, she she basically thinks she needs to drop the whole relatable thing because that's really not who Adele is anymore.
I think that she's plans, oh love our wild bog show English, and it's like you don't talk like that anymore, just saying just be true to who you are.
But she does all this old English you know, yeah, really had a bitch face. I think they've forgotten they're being filmed like that.
So TikTok is on the verge of being banned in the US.
It's all over the American news. Jackie and Biden's on board to get it canceled, and Trump is the one who says, nah, even though he hates China, Trump's saying nah, it shouldn't be canceled. Biden wants it. He just could be a big mistake.
Why is Trump saying it shouldn't. But I would have thought he would want a ban too.
He doesn't want a band, he just wants American ownership of it. So because well you tell the story, because it's quite an involved story back then.
With giving them six months to make it not Chinese owned, and then it would be banned.
So they've got to sell it to a US company or someone else, and they've got six months to do it. And they've never shown any interest in doing this before, even though they've known this to be a threat. So if the company that owns TikTok, which is bite Dad's, choose not to sell it off, then it will.
Be turned off America. It will be burned off. Yeah, yeah, which is strange because it's already banned in China. Isn't that weird? So everyone in the world gets to play with TikTok, and the kids get the influence and they get fed things that you know, it's possible, they get fed things that the Chinese government want them to see. Now, a lot of it's just playful dancing, and people have got their own little small businesses on TikTok. So last night on CNN, I was watching some big fat American influencer woman. She's like, you know, we got a small business on TikTok. You know I've been posting myself selling ten in products. You know they're gonna rub me my small bit. Well, yeah, too bad. Like what do you think taxi drivers went through when Uber started? Like you what about Pizza Hut? They all shut down because everyone did the little suburban pizza change. You got to roll with the flow. But do you think canceling TikTok is the right way to go because of maybe a threat the Chinese government can access the data.
It's like we're all we're saying, oh, China, TikTok's taking too much of our personal info.
But Facebook takes all our personal.
Info as well. Yeah, but China also American company to do it. Because China, it's not just about the information, it's about what you do with the information. Because a lot of the surveillance cameras, let's say around Australia, for example, are also brought from China. No nothing wrong with that. They're very technically advanced. A lot of shit comes from China. But thank God for China for making stuff cheap. Sure, Hey, do we want to pay double for the knikes? No we don't, so we're just allow it to happen. But what happens with this is if the government wants the data, the TikTok are forced by law to give it to the government. And for example, face recognition cameras in all our security cameras, they can capture our facial recognition. We're only steps away from like mass, like a mass breakout of identity theft. So if they've got your face, all your details, your mother's name, your favorite color, your birthday, all your identity can be vanished. This is the fear of a lot of politicians in America, is that right, like it all seems innocent, but we are like very close to losing our individuality. And imagine if a thousand Jackieo's popped up online getting getting a bank, loans, buying cars, bracking up debt. Then that all ends up on your lap feet and you're at home trying to sort it out on the telephone with someone on the AP.
I guess, in a way, trust that they know that if it's a threat, then perhaps it really is a threat. You know, and if that's the case, maybe that is the right decision. If we're dealing with something like that. I don't know where this could land in, you know, years from now with all that information. I really don't.
I think that's what the problem is. But at the moment, like, if you're on TikTok, you having fun, You're thriving on that app, you know what I mean.
Yeah, there's a billion users worldwide on TikTok, us being its largest market with one hundred and fifty million, So I guess if it gets banned, you're just going to have one lucky platform that will word or get about that this is the new TikTok and that will be so yeah, someone will pop up to replace it.
Really weird because you know, we're in we live in the West, and it's supposed to be about free market. So there should be an another company that can make a better TikTok. Yeah, it's owned in America and they just squash TikTok.
But TikTok would have to work in for that to begin.
Yeah, they're going n nah, we'll we'll just ban you. Yeah, No, I don't know if I'm into it.
All right, Well, in other things.
You'd rather have your identity stolen and that it's not the way, it's just so you just so you can do dances in the backyard with your gay friends.
What does Donald Trump think then? Why does he want it still around and not banned? Then he obviously doesn't see it as a threat.
No, no, he says that it is a threat, but like they should be that there are other ways to do it rather than ruining everyone's small businesses online because there's a lot there's a lot of people that are used that for work.
You know.
Okay, Well, moving on to Jason.
He's always about the benefit of the individual making more money per person.
Now, Jason was doing a show in Leeds yesterday in the UK, well just because he's doing a little bit of a tour, and he was doing the show and he mid song had to stop because he needed to go to the toilet, couldn't hold on any longer. And you'd think number one or this is my I think that when you need to do number ones, you can always hold on unless you've got the bladder issue.
Yes that is true, But with number twos sometimes you just can't hold on.
And I don't know, I know afterwards he posted a TikTok to show, Oh this is kind of what happened, like a re enactment of him peeing into a gatorade bottle. Not that you saw it that particular, but I'm just wondering, as he done that so that we don't think he did a shit like is that or did he really genuinely just need to pee? I don't know, but one thing I will say is when he stopped his performance midway and told the audience, I need to go to the bathroom, they booed him, Like at what show does that ever happen? It doesn't matter what a person says on stage that you're there to see. They can do no wrong. We cheer for everything that they do. So I was really surprised that they boot him. Let's have a listen. I'm so sorry.
Do you mind him?
I squeeze about him real quick?
Oh, how Uncodi?
You'll come out here to lead only a scene. You sort of done your ship before you got on stad Like everyone's got to go to the bathroom. You've got to be You've got to be allowed to if the guy's got to get.
But I reckon, you're eye Jackie yeah, I think you probably did have to do a Poopye.
Yeah, well I reckon he did, because I feel like you can always hold on just that extra little bit longer for a week, even though it's uncomfortable, you can still hold on. You can just squeeze the poop back in as well.
No, not if you've got but diarrhea situation, if you feel like you've got the seven dwarfs in there and jumping up and down on that pieces to force it out of your anus canal.
You know that.
Jackie laughs because she can relate.
I can relate. I come and it's coming coming up shortly, the pop Quiz, your chance to win ten thousand dollars. It's on the way, JACKIEO. Hail and Jackie O.
So you get your hand up.
I want to look for Australia's sexiest hottest voice male and female, because what's your idea of hot though, Well, here's what I want to talk about. We did a segment the other day called second Date Update, and we have had a lot of people talking about this particular segment because when the girl came on, she had dated this guy three dates in he she was painting him to be like the perfect guy. But then when they got in the bedroom, he was way too sensitive, like too tender and yeah, I remember her and she wanted to tell him that's why she ghosted him, because it was too tender in the bedroom. She wanted a bit of a throw around. And we imagined in our heads, what you know, this guy was like like a locky Yeah, yeah.
I love, I love, let me play in great detail. That's what I thought he was going to be like same.
Yeah. Then we called him up and we were a bit thrown by the voice because he had a really masculine, sexy voice, and so many women were commenting on our social media were calling in about this particular guy's voice and really, yeah, if you missed it, have a listen.
Absolutely.
I guess I'm a bit confused by is that when when we'd spoken and kind of the lead up and the I guess the four play into it was that you wanted to be taken care of.
You wanted Oh yeah, sounded like Mama got excited about that.
Oh he's sweet and kind and he's got that voice. I wonder what.
Then we literally had women calling through instantly about this guy.
Hey, guys, I am a happily married woman. But that voice, I just want him to take me out, jump me.
I'll take him tenderly, I'll take him roughly, I'll.
Take him wherever.
But that voice, I'm going to say through me, the voice. I wasn't expecting that voice.
Okay, well still to come, Yeah I tried. Yeah. So there are some, There are some sexy voices, like they really stand out when you do hear them, don't they they do?
Yeah, sometimes we get callers on the end. All the girls look at each other, We give each other the look like hot voice, he's got.
It, you know, I know you're very twy.
You like no, you can tell thirteen one oh six five if you think you've got the hot voice, female or male? What makes them female? Sexy voice?
Well, you know those, you know usually it's those you know those late night ads. You know that you see those late night as like hey, fellas, do you want to do you want to special?
Night?
In that special? I love? Yeah, they're they're usually.
That more of a like, you know, a bit mature sounding like fellers, wouldn't you you.
Don't want a granny like trying to sound?
Does those? I think you know who does them? Kirston who works on our show. She's our guest booker, filling in for Mayo. She does that, I think, is it those kind of ads cursed on that you do? Oh, come in, then come in? Actually we should hear a not on that pathetic Marc out there. That's a YEPI hi. Yeah.
I tried to have a little bit of a voiceover career before I was a producer, and the only jobs that I ever got were Sexyland, Club X, bras and things.
All the Oh, give us a little bit of club X. Do you remember the script I remember doing in his sultry voice, You give us some sultry in this fifteen hang on, hang on here thing. Have you got any music there the back we need to recreate.
Okay, Oh yeah, seen percent of European Ties and blind folds.
That's wow. Yeah, that's the that's the voice. You only remember the bit that appealed to you, the European Ties and blind Yeah.
I got some freebies for it. Actually they didn't pay me.
I got some freebies.
They didn't pay you would they give you?
Yeah, I was working for another network. It was just an office voice freebie.
But that is a soldier that you were nailing the voice that impressive right.
Of the other girls character. So that's nice, Lingers. Lingers, get on my linas kidding the ear and let's hear your let's do a competition.
Because the last time we heard Ling's trying to be sultry, she made the classic on air statement, I don't that's all. I don't know whether that's sultry or not.
Yeah, she voiced.
But I did get asked once before I was on the team to do like a sexy laugh for a ad. I don't even know the sexy sexy laugh I was do it.
It was like a giggle.
It was like do it, No, it's do it. It was just like.
Like that type that's cute. It's cute. Yeah, sexy.
Sexy voice.
Female here have a sexy voice.
There's like a rat voice that you like, Kyle, Like a girl called Ugh, she's like nineteen twenty years old and you can just tell she's a rat.
Is a rat? You like that?
I feel everyone likes something different, like you know, yeah, it depends what you're what you're looking for. If you're looking for thee you're like, yeah, like it depends where your mind's Who.
Has the sexiest male voice on the team.
Who do you reckon?
Would Kyle? I think that would be I think that'd have to be me.
Very Yeah, dear Holk, you have quite a good voice.
I've been told that before.
Now you're changing.
Or Josh sex addict?
Josh, you can barely understand what he sees your life growing up in the caravan.
Yeah, that's Hulk making fun of Josh. Let's hear the real Josh.
Oh that was me, was it? Yeah?
Shking about that?
Oh yeah, that is kind of sexy.
Nothing unless you want to have sex with a junkie. That's a junkie voice. Yeah. Sorry, Josh, you're a great bike but you got the voice of a back back alley junkie.
Get up.
I want to have Pedro. Let's hear Pedro's got I don't have a good voice, bro, Yeah it's not it's not even put anything on like it's Yeah, how do you try and sound sexy? Would you like me to try like.
A Russell Crow?
Or let's play a Russell Crow. If you got Russell Crowe in the system? Thing okay, and we'll let you hear Russell Crowe because he's renowned for having the sexy voice and then you try.
You know, last time I saw a Gladiator, I actually watched it in the Colosseum in rom And I actually got a little bit embarrassed that I received so much attention for that film.
It's an incredible ensemble cut. Okay you yeah, that's you. Just want to sit cross leg in front of Russell and look up at him on a chair just talking for hours? Yep, yeah, even me as a bloke.
Oh, I can talk for you for hours.
You sound like a predator. That's a predator's voice. I didn't like that at all, little bit. Morgan Freeman, let's get Morgan free that's a voice. Listen to this play, the one that whispers. It tells me what's right and what's not. Yeah, that's a voice, believe and where to go. It's not Shakespeare. It does not speak in memorable lines. My owner voice always gives it to me streaked.
But it's a bit like too much like a narrator. So I don't want to have six No, you don't, because it's not real.
It doesn't seem real. It seems like I'm hearing it in a movie.
Not real. I've heard I haven't heard this but I've have been told that Will Arnette, you should listen to Will Arnette's voice. The actor Will Arnette, what's he been in? He's just like amazing comedies.
But apparently he's a big part actor.
Never the lead would even voice because I've been told it's good he you.
Know, doing the Lego master has been so really come on, it's.
Miss lad there, sorry, miss l who.
Picked will an It's voice to be sexy.
He's known to have a really like good voice.
He does heaps of.
Voiceover Na Na, but not voiceovers. I don't want Robin Williams in the bedroom. I want, you know, Russell Crow.
I don't want the guy who can do great voices.
I want the guys. You know what I'm saying. There were the guys who can mimic, and then there are guys who just have a sexy voice.
Sure is the difference.
Scarlet Johanson apparently is on the list as well as female sexy.
I didn't like my first kiss, so I redid it. Yeah, I didn't like it at all.
The one I liked was at like a party that was like kind of boys and girls kind of kissing party.
It was like a spin the bottle kind of.
Isn't too husky for you or you like the huskiness.
Well, it sounds like she'd be up for a couple of shots and a bit of a good time. She had that sort of rasping. You know, she's a good time girl.
Any girl has a little bit of raspiness to their voice.
You immediately goes, she's a party girl.
That's exactly true, don't you.
You do kind of is that because when you're hungover, you sound like that, and so you just very y.
Yeah, your throat's always itchy. You and they might not sound hot, but they are usually hot those Yeah.
That's true. You know the guy who actually called through for the second date update that we talked about, Chris, He's on the phone just to find out, like, does this voice kind of get you places?
Hi, chrig Chris, welcome back for good morning?
Oh if we're going to top you, Chris, I just don't know if anyone's yeah, well.
I hear that.
Even that sentence happy to be back even phrased it perfectly.
What happened with the girl by the way, just out of interest, Well.
We met up. We met up that night actually, and it's thrashing Yeah, Well we had a good go of it, and at this point I'm unghosted. But we'll see how we go.
You got ghosted again? No, no, no ghost you're unghosted.
So she hears what she wants to hear.
Jackie, you can take her out for a drink and you can hear what's going on.
So did you did you pick her up and throw her on the bed and do stuff like that?
Yeah?
Someone like that, lucky lucky?
Does she? Did she get what she wanted? Or what was the chat afterwards?
Well? I'm all pretty happy, I think. And then I've had a lot of messages. We're meeting up on Saturday, so I think we're doing. Okay, you're doing.
We've repaired this potential disaster.
Do you get a lot of comments on your voice?
Ah, every so often.
Yeah, you're very modest too. I think I feel like this guy's a modest guy, right, doesn't like to brag or gloat.
Nothing good about that?
My god, you'd say that, wouldn't your whole being?
Listen, we're not all army guys. We can't all walk around with all our medals and achievements on our uniform. We've got to tell people what we've achieved in life.
I love it. Well, Chris, we're going to try and top your sexy voice and see if we can't find something hotter. Yeah, good luck.
I know it's not going to be It's not going to be easy at all, is it not? No, Because it's not just the tone of the voice. It's the timber of the voice. Yep, it's the phrasing and it's the words he's saying. It's all round perfect.
Yes, it has to have all the ingredients.
No arrogance in these voice.
Well thirteen one oh sixty five, guy or girl, if you think you've got the sexiest voice, and we'll award you with a great prize to crown you Australia's hoddest voice.
What are we going to give it, Peter?
What do we have to give them? It's a thousand bucks cash.
There you go, all the management of running shaking their head too late, a thousand dollars cash. It is for the sexiest voice. Ring through thirteen sixty five at Kiss at the moment, our very own single Jackie. She's fixated on voices. We had a caller on the other day, Chris on our second date update and Chris was sort of painted as a bussy boy. You know, we couldn't please women in the bedroom. And then he was heard on air and all women rang from far and wide. Do me now? Do me now? They loved the guy's voice anyway, The guy wasn't a bussy boy. He just thought the woman wanted to be treated gently. But he's since thrashed it and everything's good.
So Chris is our benchmark. He's still with us.
If you can top his voice as being the sexiest and hottest voice in Australia, we'll give you a thousand dollars and that's female and male. Chris, So you stay here.
Okay, will you help us jug here?
You Chris isn't going to want anyone to beat him, so we can't be the judge, but you'll just be referred back to for comparison if we find a good one. Okay, okay, all right, Scott, you reckon you might be able to.
Top Chris is Well, apparently someone reckons I might be able to you.
Oh that's not a bad, that's kind of.
Yeah, that that was just him on then.
Sorry, the guy's so hot. He doesn't care about the blokes names hod guys. They don't even They don't even register that there's another man around because they're sucking up all the energy.
The hot guys, I'm not even listening to your show.
This guy's got the I don't give a f kind of sexy voice, you know, like, not not as much as Chris is. I'm sorry, Scott, Scott see voice.
But he might get up from the bedroom and then you just hear the front doors shut in the car driver.
Yeah, yeah, he's not whatever. He's not as good. It's just not quite as sexy as Chris is. So you're still top dog, Chris. Darren's phoned in.
Hi Darren, Hey, Hi, Hi Carl and Jackie.
Hell are you guys? Good?
Good man? Good? Yeah? You got that ghastly agree?
I agree?
Are you gay?
By the way, definitely not? But can you figure this?
Can you pitch your hot chocolate lava dripping down your beautiful chin.
On her?
Where's the whatever?
I needed to do?
God's fun, cheeky, he is going to marry.
You've got a good voice, but no, not as good as Chris is. Chris brother all right, Jordan, Hi, a female female voice, Okay, Hi, good morning guys.
Morning, You've got no movement, No movement. I'm going to give it a tweak nothing.
Can you hear me, guy?
Morning?
Can you hear me now?
Yeah?
We can hear you. Yeah, yep. Have you been told you've got a sexy voice for a girl?
Well?
I appreciate what you're saying.
Can you hear me now?
Is that better?
You're gone? Okay? Thank you?
Win?
At this point?
Is she You're right? She's like the old bird that never made it off reception. You know what I'm saying, She's been there forty years.
I get John A.
Mayle High, good morning, he made well, very well. Thanks. Where are you at Sydney?
And have you been told you have a hot voice there? John?
Yes? Actually, a couple of weeks ago I bought a new car and the n R lady, Yeah I thought I did, and I asked for a discount, but she couldn't.
Yeah, okay, fine, Yeah, so that's the only woman she had a great voice.
Oh really?
Yeah? But John, I'm afraid it's still you gotta as good as Chris is.
Still the sex to beat you.
Hey, I'm stoked to this. You guys are my biggest allies.
Yeah, yeah, I know, Okay. Louisa we've got a female. Hi Louisa, good morning.
How are we And you will listen to me, and you will obey me.
No, thank you, terrify me. I don't like masks, and I don't like to be hurt. Okay, I won't be tied up Tom.
Him.
Put a shiver down my spine that one, Tom, You're on? Good morning? Hey?
Hey you doing?
Now?
This is what's your real voice? Is this your real voice?
Yeah?
This is my real voice.
Oh, this is a good one. This is good.
Have a conversation. Enough with the fonsie. She stopped working.
I'm going to turn us off. Have you been told you have a great voice, Tom?
Yeah, I've been told from a couple of exits in the past and my previous my now wife.
You you already called her the previous wife.
Mistake getting nervous to be on the station.
Now, that's all right, that's right now?
What are you good?
Yeah?
It's out there.
He also sounds like he's like he's he spends all night out though, you know what I mean, he's going to a raspiness to him.
How old are you?
Tom?
I'm thirty two?
Now thirty two? Okay? And yeah, what do you like as a person, because we gathered that Chris is a lovely guy, like as well, I'm like, I'm like.
The best there is.
I'm like the jack of all trades. I'm anything you want me to be.
Like, what what do you do that's so special? Most amazing thing you did for your wife?
Took it to Bali a couple of weeks ago.
Oh yeah, she's taught. Jack's talking about more.
That was like last week in the bedroom.
Okay, right, so the guys and all around.
Stand by, even though I don't know if you're going to beat Chris, but stand by.
You have a voice off. Yeah, Holly, another girl's on the she's playing she's got a sexy voice.
Hello, Holly, Hi, I actually.
Have evidence that I have the sexiest voice in Sydney.
It's true.
Yeah, because I used to work in a.
Call center and I earned international trips and you had to be the best in Australia and guys only book that ads with me because of my voice?
Yeah, she she conjures up a cuteness, doesn't she.
Yeah, there's a proud of Holly's voice that thinks another thirty seconds of chatting and she could come around here and we could be having sex.
My picture right now, Holly's in like this little kind of She's just got like cat ears on or something. You know, she's got that cute very specific with going to a Halloween Party's got a little black corset on and not much else and cats.
It's March. Why would she be going.
To That's just how I imagine her, Like how do you imagine?
But I imagine her to be like petite, a little short, but were just no. I feel that she's like blonde, honey blonde. I think honey blonde? She's no?
Is she?
I reckon?
She do?
Tell us what you look like?
Kyle?
All the guys think that I look like what you describe me. I am a brunette, but I am cute.
You are you fat?
No?
What are your weigh petit sixty.
Sixty? I don't know if that's petite? Your heart on the borderline on the borderline.
But you're going to give women any disorders you are.
I think that you should have a girl's category because you can't compete me with a guy.
It is hard, it is in this day and age. Everyone's got to be included because that's how people.
We're just gonna have to decide, like we're not doing too We're just doing one only. So James, we're gonna heep you on hold Holly, James's next, Hi, James, your last one morning? Figure it out?
You wanting everybody?
Hey, what's up? James? Hey Jack? Yep? Sorry, but I don't know what do.
You sound like a pedophile priest?
Is what?
It's what? That's the vibe I get?
Yeah, well you always get that with the Iris.
Ex don't you.
Are your Iris?
The Irish are sexy already, you know they are. It's a cheeky, mischievous. I don't know, you know what I'm saying with the Irish dudes, and like you think they're.
Cheek's a bit about yourself there, James.
We've lived three for fifteen years, fifty seven and live in Murray for thirty seven years.
Yeah, okay, Al I've decided you are not as good as Chris. A sorry, James, love you, but off you go. So that leaves Tom and Holly to compete against Chris.
Okay, okay, Tom and Chris. Good morning, good morn morning.
Oh wait, it's time to tell who's who here?
Got a there was an ai repeat it.
Is, isn't it? Tom? Just kind of we didn't we didn't. Oh you're the one that's married, right and took your wife to bar?
Yeah that's right.
Yeah, pretty much.
Yeah, do you do what don't you don't?
Tom and Chris, why don't you just have a conversation about you?
Yeah, ask each other questions? This would be good.
Chris, you asked Tom your favorite drink?
What do you want? You go to drink?
I'll go to drink would be Hennessy. Good choice, good choice on the rocks, sometimes on the rock, sometimes strange times.
Wrong, Yeah, on the day. Yeah, no, I get it?
Who said I know? I get it? Who said that? Tom?
No?
That that was me?
Chris. I think christ is the sexiest. Then yes, ahead, Yeah, Chris, I think you beat Tom. So Chris, stand by Holly for the girl.
This is not fair.
It's really hard to pick between because who's maybe problem you because you're not by my bisexu.
I actually go for the more gay voice, like the gayer sounding the voice. You like that for that so you could be neutral in this then yeah, potentially Okay.
Okay, Holly, get your sexiest voice on. Start talking to Chris.
Hi, Chris, how are you.
I'm good, Holly, this is like porn.
This is so good.
Not much? What about you?
Oh?
Well, I work hard and then I'll have a drink and I'll hang out with the boys.
What kind of work do you do?
I'm in finance. What about you?
Cool?
A bit of this and a bit of a bit of everything.
What are you doing this weekend?
I'm not sure? What about you?
Well, I just met a lovely woman, so I'll be seeing her right, Yeah, what about it tomorrow? Sorry, Holy, tell me about the best day you had last week?
The best day I had last week? How about you telling me about the best day.
You have, Holly?
That's with the mystery what It doesn't matter that Holly doesn't want to say anything. The voice is so misteio.
So you guys don't care that there's no conversation, just bonus points.
Jack, No, not, honestly, I don't want to hear a long don't want your long, boring stories about Like.
I don't care how hot you are. If I can't have a conversation, we're done. Like, but you guys don't care.
No, it's quite hard to have a conversation when with what you're thinking you're going to be doing When you're with a woman, there's not a lot of room for talking. Do you know what I'm saying?
Well, I say Chris for the wind, then he's the all rounder.
I hang on, what about?
What do you guys think?
We all know where you're so hot that if I just wish you would say a little bit more.
Yeah, you don't understand that's the perfect woman. No, you got to have You don't want to hear about your long thoughts and all your dreams. You care about that well, ship that stuff?
What are you going to I guess you just jumped straight into the bedroom.
What do you think you think, Holly or Chris? What do you think?
Can't be neutral about it?
I'm going to be completely honest.
Chris's voice is like vibrating in my easy going down.
My penis just so deep and so good.
Yeah it is it is. Yeah, you got to you best reassess what team you're on. My young friend Peter, Yeah, it's the sheerer for me.
I really did feel that, and I'm a gay man, but I felt something out of her.
Okay, yeah, what about you, Coops?
Yeah, I'm the same with Pete.
I'm going the girl as well.
Yeah, Hi, Holy, hkeep says, Hi, Holly, do you ask anything Cooper? She's a real, real habitchat this one. Yeah. How how old are you, Holly?
Because you obviously sound very young.
I'm not.
I'm thirty three.
My lord. Yeah, he married a something. Holy? Is that why you're not giving much intel?
I'm not married.
You're a fella.
No, So when's the last relationship you had a year ago? And what was he like? Tell us about him?
He was nice, decent?
Well what happened?
I don't know?
He just did he just stop coming around?
Yeah?
Did you run any things to talk about with each other?
How long?
No?
I don't run out of things to talk about. But you've got to remember, I'm live on our and my whole way I'm shaking.
She's live on our. Yeah, I get that. Don't worry that frenzy.
Okay, sometimes people get nervous, So I get it. I get it.
Yeah, but you sound good, you know what I mean? Like the voice is, it's got a you can earn money off that voice is all she does.
She does.
I don't do that job anymore. But yeah, I was the top salesperson in the whole of Australia.
Yeah, stop bringing that up because that's not sexy. Right. You were the you were the most successful telephone operator in the sales room. Not sexy. Yeah, well you think so what do you think you had good things to sell?
Don't know because of my voice? Need to tell me they love my voice?
It was it mainly was it mainly guys buying off you with the women like no thanks, and the women the guys like, tell me everything about the product really and.
What was the product.
Was?
When people wanted to sell cars, I would help them advertise it. So it was mainly guys audience and yeah, and guys would always put their ads in with me.
Yeah, I want to put it. I want to I want to put an ad in for all my cards. I didn't eve want to sell them.
Yeah, yeah, I can see, I can see. Okay, Well, so.
We're in this. We're like, we're stuck here. We tried to together, but there was no electricity.
Think I'm not I'm not torn at all. I stay out there.
I'm not going to go to every single person, but nat has we gone around the room to find out?
Yeah, so the majority of saying Chris, there's only two that are saying.
Oh, so just Peter and Coops, Yes, and me and Alfie and Kyle so four four and that means one, two, three, four, five, six, seven eight thing? What are you? I'm the guy nine nine to four.
Well what a bunch of okay? Well, Chris, is it sorry?
You retain the title of Australia's Hottest voice.
Not only is the voice the hottest, but the conversation, the phrasing, everything.
Just who you are as a person as well makes it.
Congratulations. Let's see what you can do with that wonderful award.
A thousand bucksat treat that new missus of yours to a lovely night out.
And by the way, christ you might have missed. In the middle of all that, I noticed Jackie did ask if you ales And you didn't hear.
That because the other one said, yeah, I said you do.
That too, Chris, Yes, yes, I do. Invite me around, guys, I whisper, sweet, nothing's into all your ears?
All?
That would be such a tea quiz.
We made the right Jackie did Jackie says, skip the ear, go straight to the ar. Sorry, my mistake. Maybe I make a misunderstood owners up next Brooklyn, we'll update us with the latest national headlines coming up and kids Jaggio Kiss m High, guys all and jackieos ten thousand dollars pup Quiz Pop Quiz all thanks to Glowbird Energy playing this morning. Wanting the ten grand Georgia at Quakers Hill.
Hello, Hey, sure, Hi, I'm good.
Okay, Yeah, good to talk to you. If you get a question right, we give you one hundred dollars for that and every question Tally's up unless you get all ten right that jackpots to ten grand with sixty seconds on the clock.
Georgia, Oh, fingers crossed, Honey, here we go? Quest number one?
What kids show is Elmo from des Street?
Who is Shorter? Has Bula or Danny DeVito?
Oh? Has Buller? Yeah? Life Goes On is a song by Ed Sheeran. And which country music star oh.
Skip?
Which supermodel was married to Tom Brady?
Oh Skip?
Who released the twenty twenty song Savage Love? Jason Derulo yea in Modern Family? What was the name of Mitch and Cam's daughter Lily? Which car is Keanu Reeves famous for driving in the John Wick films.
Oh Ah, I'm gonna say a Lamborghini.
Michael Clark is famous for which sport.
Cricket?
Which female rapper released the song Bongo's last year. Megan the Stallion, who directed the Avatar films. He did Titanic as well. Stephen James, No.
Yeah, James Cameron flies around his own helicopter. How ballings that blow? How much we got?
You got five hundred dollars.
Halfway? You missed a few? Life goes on, Ed Sheeran and Luke Combs as the country start. Giselle Vinchin, you know, Giselle the supermodel. The rest you got right or wrong? Well done?
Thanks so much, so much, guys.
I really appreciate that.
You're welcome. What are sweetie? How appreciative? Isn't it nice?
Very polite? All right, we got a round of b news coming up shortly, guys, and then we'll be playing ABC's for the double Past to Pink.
But after that, the girl that identifies as a dog.
Yes, what is that all about? You think, Well, we don't know either, so we're going to fight. Does she speak English? Has anyone found out.
To speaks English? She's in America, But it says here on the sheet is her name Miao? Yeah, her name's Miao and she identifies.
As she's This is the hell of a screwed up name for yeah, being a person who identifies as a dog, and your name happens to be me ow. It's all wrong.
I don't think I don't think she was named that by her parents. Oh, I think she's calling herself meow.
And Tom Grennan he'll be zooming in for a chat as well, coming up and kiss. Yes, what do you mean?
Yes, indeed it is not prepared feeling filling. So I get my headphones on. You called me by surprise. Sorry, Okay, so the Spice girls are rallying.
You're not thinking about that guy again? I forget the Spice girls. Are you thinking about that guy's voice still? Well, you've just been staring out the window like a lost soul since we had that sexy voice guy on, just dreaming looking.
At the water, just like, oh no, I'm just looking at what a beautiful day it is today. You know it's not lovely covering you.
Covering Listen, you can glance out the window and go, oh that's nice, but just just gawking out there for no ten minutes.
Well, you know Jerry Halliwell is going through all this stuff with the husband, right, the Red Bull formula one not.
Honestly, I've not read what it is. I don't even know what the story is real quick.
Back in February, he was accused of behaving inappropriately towards a female Red Bull employee. He was later cleared the next day, though text messages between him and another woman went public, and the messages apparently included Christian asking to see what she looked like under her underwear, and Jerry has not like she stood by him through all of that. Now that the text message is got revealed, she hasn't commented. And Melby was doing an interview. A fellow Spice girl was doing an interview on one of the morning shows and was saying.
That all the girls are rallying around Jerry, and you've all.
Rallied behind Jerry, of course because she's been going through a tough time.
Yeah, I mean that's the thing.
When you're going through something like that, you really do need your friends and family, and we're all very supportive and I feel really sad for her.
Right, we were so excited when on these women you said there was exciting news coming later in the.
I'm always the one saying the spy skills are getting together. I always get told off, but we are doing something.
Just tell nobody else between it and everybody, what the liten.
I've got to go. I'm off to meet the Queen.
This woman, no matter what she's talking about, scary spice will always throw in the spy skills to getting back. I was so sad for Jerry's cheating husband rumors. But guess what, the spy skills we're getting back together. We are not believing it anymore. It's more true.
It's every time I love it.
I love it.
At least she talks, you know what I mean?
Yeah, that's true.
She's give an answer and be funny about at it. So details of Matthew Perry's will has been revealed as well. Oh yeah, he created this will in two thousand and nine, and he stipulated that the majority of his belongings be placed in a trust. A trust he named the Alvi Singer Living Trust, which is after a Woody Allen character in a film called Annie Hall. And the papers state that it is.
Yes.
If he had any kids, he did not want them to be entitled to any of his fortune. He was never going to give children any of his money is one of those one of those parents who don't want to give the kids anything. So if he did happen to have children, that would have been stipulated. And then he really just left all of it to his dad John, his mum Suzanne, and his half sister and interestingly an ex girlfriend who he dated for two years. But you know, he signed the will like well after that broke up, so he included her in it, so she must have left impression. And if that comes off the back of Matthew's stepfather, Keith Morrison doing an interview about just how hard Matthew Perry's struggles were, it seemed by so many accounts he was on the mend.
I mean, that's what it was.
That's what it seemed like.
And I think as he put it himself in his in his book and in the talks that he had about his book, it is a disease and it's a very very difficult one to be I don't think he ever would have said he felt like he was.
He felt like he was beating it, but you never beat it and he knew that too.
How are you and how is your wife after Matthew's passing.
Well, it's a it doesn't go away.
It's with you every day, it's with you all the time, and there's some new aspect of it that assaults your your brain, and.
You know it's not easy, especially for his mom. Yeah, so why would you? Why did he give some of his money to an ex years after they split up? They were they still friends? Or maybe he helped her through tough times. I don't know, no story there, right, No, it just happened.
The name Yeah, I don't even know who she is, Rachel does.
I didn't like these really rich people who go, I'm giving all my money to charity and my children can struggle along. Because isn't everything when you have children about the happiness and the and the luck of the child. Yeah?
I feel that way. I mean, I god kids, but I couldn't imagine not leaving everything to my daughter. I just couldn't, Like, why wouldn't I wouldn't I want to give her the best starting life, Like I've got stipulations in there, like she can't just have it all at once, Like she can't be eighteen and have everything. I mean, I don't want that either.
But are you going to drip feed sort of? YEA some sort of fund down, because.
When you're eighteen or twenty one, you still don't really you're not that sensible with money, you know.
Jackie like that sounds clever. But I know several people, and I mean more than five, Yeah, that their parents died. They were very wealthy. They became trust fund babies, I mean in their teens, like fifteen sixteen. Yeah, and the manager that was in control of it squirreled most of it away. In every case, in all five of the people I know, it was mismanaged by the fund manager. I don't know those people went without. It happens a lot.
I have a different individuals, so one person cannot make all the decisions.
It has to be there are others, so it is not just one person.
And if you were dead and Kitty was nineteen, you wanted to just you wanted to still have to go cap in hand to some big fat swine that's somewhere to get her money.
She will have a bit of money, but no, she has to earn her living like.
You're one of You're one of them.
Yeah, I'm not giving her millions of dollars.
A horrible mother it Hey, like what age.
It gets drip fed. So it's like, I think there is some at eighteen, and there might be twenty five and then thirty, the rest of it at thirty. Yeah, all of it will be at thirty. But you've got to remember, she'll have the house that I'm building.
She'll have build yet, let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Well that's true, but she'll have that land. Yeah, that's worth a lot.
So can she sell it or is she going to wait till she's thirty?
No, no, she can sell it. I think I actually I'll sweep in.
There is the Godfather and take care of all that anyway, obviously.
Now, oh, now you're going to be the godfather?
Well what do you mean? Now?
Wait?
Now, you didn't even give her a.
Present for a birthday. Now suddenly when there's a multimillion dollar piece of land up for say, or you're swooping.
I'm here for the important things, not every day rubbish.
Every day. It's just once a year I give over a birthday present.
He's had one birthday, yes.
And Kitty has had thirteen of them.
Yes, However eleven of them. I wasn't the godfather, that's right.
So what happened to the other two, Well, you're not proving to be a very good godfather.
Get the presence. When she's thirty, she knows to get them all at once, that's right.
She'll get the iPhone eleven which.
Yes, yes, and the earphones that came out just before the pods. You know that's just the last atack. Yes, the cord. But you know, as a godfather, I don't have to do anything until you're dead. My job requires nothing until and I just swoop in when you when you've killed yourself dating the wrong bloke, you know what I mean, Like you get chopped up and thrown into the sea in a suitcase. That's when I'll show up. Oh, don't worry, But.
That's how you think I'm going out by picking a who's going to cut me up into.
I just you know those people exist, so I'm always I'm very I warned Jackie a lot. Don't do this, don't go here, don't don't get involved in that. She's very naive to the evils of the world, which I also like, because nothing worse than being over scared about everything.
Yeah, you can't be You're at the other end like that. But i'd be sensible, but you can't actually be scared, sensible but not fearful.
Yeah, I think you need to watch a few more, you know, scary.
Documents I don't like watching. I think if you watch too much of that stuff, it gets in your head and then you start thinking it's going to happen to you, and then you're living a life where you're not doing anything, just being aware.
But where where you're in the Lola la la la bay land.
You know what I mean, love love being in that land that's I to be.
It doesn't help you though, when the wolf creek eye shows up and you'll be like, he's fine, he's reminded me of my dad. I'll come back to you, abandoned lot. Yeah.
Yeah, I'm trying to think of situations I've been in.
Actually, I mean there have been situations where I thought, hmm, I'm putting a lot of trust in this situation right now.
Yes, Like when you walked home from the MTV Awards in Spain for two hours, when you didn't even in the middle of the night broke.
Yeah.
Jackie wanted to beat the traffic, but when she went out, she realized there's no taxis, so she started walking in Barcelona yeah, an hour from the city. She just walking through the streets.
I was in Barcelona with a friend before, before I had my boyfriend and my friend I was traveling with went to bed early and I was like, no, I want to go out to a gay club. So google maps where the gay clubs were and walked there at night through Barcelona. Oh my god, I thought I was going to die. Yeah, yeah, those streets, Jacuary.
Actually Jackie was more terrifying than she makes out because whenever she would see like a group of like twenty guys it's just milling around, she'd hide in a bush and wait up to twenty minutes for them to walk past. Terrified. Yeah. Yeah, And she didn't have international roaming.
She was too cheap, I know, So I couldn't even call you, could I I remember that?
And guess where I was? At a P Diddy white party in the Hills, dancing on the floor with Christina Aguilera and justin Timberlake. And where's Jackie hiding in the bushes in the suburbs.
It wasn't a fun night. Yeah, all right, Well, Tom Brennan is going to be joining us on Zoom and then one of the best nights Ever avc's your chance to go to Pink and see her in concept and Tom.
Grennan's coming to Australia. We got a zoom in has had a heap of hits. Yeah we heard that. I can never hear enough of that for even though. Where to see him live and to buy tickets go to Secretsounds dot com. We got Tom up on the zoom Tom Grennan bro welcome back. How I am?
Yes, yes, yes, how are we feeling in Australia today?
Yes, it is so beautiful.
At the studio and it's dark right now, but yeah, I'm good to good to good to speak to you again.
Does that mean you're recording new music or what are you doing at the studio?
Yeah?
Do you know, I'm just finishing up. I've actually been in America for most of the time writing it, and now the record is finished. So I'm just here in a place called the Coxswads, which is like in the countryside of England, which is about two hours out out of London.
I've been to the Copswand and in winter, Oh my god, it is like a fairy tale book, you know. Really it's so pretty.
It's like cottages with like smoke coming out of Chimney's open fires. It's lovely.
Yeah, it's very good, not very good for the environment. And so the cottage folk are the ones we can blame for the.
Yeah, I'll not go on and tell them for sure.
Yeah, let the cottage folk do their thing. Isn't that a beautiful raw way to live? Like just a simple life, because Tommy, you'd be flying here there recording doing shows. You're coming to Australia to do a show. Where do you find a relaxing place? Where's your quiet place? Do you have a spot.
On the golf course?
Oh you a golfer?
Are you?
When did you start that?
I've ever started about a year and a half ago. For me, it's just I've never found a sport like football or soccer that you literally just switch off and you just focused on the game, and golf for me that new thing. So I don't think about music, My phone goes away for four hours, I'm with friends and it's just a good way to.
Re Actually, I feel like everyone's doing that these days. Hey, before earlier, tom we were talking about Jason Dearulo. He was on stage and literally mid song he had to stop the music and ask the audience is it okay? Sorry? I just need to go the toilet really quick. Do you ever get that when you're on stage? Like, what is it like for an artist if you desperately need to go number ones or number twos.
I've never experienced that because I usually do it all before I go on stage, even if I don't need like, for example, if I don't need a wee, I'll still go to the toilet and make sure I push it all out, just make sure that the.
Last see Tom Grennan has listened to his mother. Before we ever went anywhere with mum in the car, we'd have to go to the toilet. We learned this very early in life. So I don't know what happened to Deula there. I reckon he had to do a shit. I reckon that big problem.
He definitely hit a big high note and it and it went yeah.
Opened up the anal canal. I get it now. You you were you going to be a professional footballer before you you did the music thing. Did you try that or was it just a dream?
I did try, but it was just a dream. I wasn't good enough. I'm going to be honest. I got I got to quite a good level, but I ended up just yeah, not become getting better and I didn't progress.
So yeah, we've got one of them. To Tom, Yeah we got one of them here. He tried to be a big football star because his father and his uncle are legendary footballers, and he was a joke. And his father reached out to me and said, listen, this kid's never going to be anything. He's been on this team. That team is never the greatest. And now he works here. We're still not sure what he does. Coop, But do you want to say hi to Tom Grennan because you don't really do much else. Hey, Thomas, how are you?
Hey? Man, I've heard you're amazing at football? Man, I've heard.
Thanks man, I appreciate that the legend lives on? Does live now? Tom? When you come out here? What's what's this? Because Taylor Swift just left and she she milked everyone for all the money. We thought it was going to fix the economy, but Taylor took all the money with her and we were like, oh yeah, she gets How long is your show? Because we had to put up with three and a half hours from Taday. It was great, It was great, great, but that's a long time.
Yeah, it's three and a half hours. It's too long for anybody, whether you like Jaylor Swift or not. Three hours and a half it's just nice. Too much for me. I'm probably going to do about an hour and thirty minutes.
Oh yeah, that's good.
She good. I like an hour.
Wonder he doesn't, no, wonder, he doesn't have to go to the toilet. Anyone can hold it for an hour and a half. I think that's the perfect length. If you want details and tickets secretsounds dot com. It will tell you where you can see them, where you can buy the tickets. We're looking forward to it. Tom. We love your music here. We're playing them all on Kiss. Thanks for thanks for stepping out and.
Yah loads of love guys. I'll see you when I'm there as well.
Ok, thank thank you man. We'd love to Tom Grennan on Kids this morning.
Yeah.
If you win ABC's today you get a double pasta Pink Summer candival to us. She's live at a Course Stadium this Saturday back in Sydney for that extra show. If you want to win thirteen when I was sixty five, you're ready to play Jackie. Yeah, crunching, crunching, crunching away there on those very rare nuts. Let's get Amy on from Maryfield High. Amy.
Hello, Amy, Good morning guys. How are you We're good?
Good? Have you seen Pinking Concert before?
No?
I haven't.
Every time come out, I've had someone something else.
On we want to go? Do you know what?
Being the same situation? Amy, you always something else is going on.
I've never seen her.
No, I've never seen her in content.
I've never seen all the trapeze.
I've never I've always wanted to.
But something all the ship shows that the ship ones that are there anyway, You'll be there from sender, but not the big one.
I'm missing out big time. I'm jealous. Amy. If you win these tickets, that's great. But here's how you got to do it. I'm going to give you five questions. Each answer has to start with the letter I give you. Your letter is H for happy.
Okay, okay, you can do it.
Give me a Disney movie.
But might as well not even read another look at that times out. What is a Disney movie? I couldn't think when.
School musical, Hannah Montage, I.
Was thinking cartoons.
You were thinking of the typicals. The Beauty of Cinderella. Staff.
Yeah, yeah, okay, well never mind Tilly and Long Jeddy, Hey, Tilly, how are you? Hey?
I'm good?
How are you?
Guys?
Good?
Tickets on? Off for good luck? What's her letter?
Thank you? S s for silly silly Billy Hill?
We go good luck?
Okay? Something you do before you sleep?
Um shower?
Yeah, a condiment, our thoughts, a full letter word, a reason for divorce.
With someone else?
A bird. Yet you're off.
You've got a double pass. This Saturday is a Core Stadium pink summer carnival tour. Enjoy, honey, it'll be great. Yeah, happy, You're welcome. Stand by. Jackie's got more own news, Brooklyn's got a national news and meow. A girl in America who identifies as a dog. Yes, it's getting weirder and weirder, but we've all got to accept it because God forbid, normal is coming back into fashion. So this girl will bark and scratch and we're going to find out and dell what's going on here? Is this a real thing? Is this is this mental disorder?
That's right? I want to know?
Is she really born a dog?
No?
You get her on for a chat? Coming up and kiss Jadgio. Now we promised you we are an open, inclusive radio show. We allow everyone, anyone who identifies like anyone else. I don't care whether you're black, white, whether you're a male, female, born this way, born that way. But here's someone that we've never met before, a young girl in the United States who identifies as a dog. And we thought we've got it. In the spirit of inclusivity, let's get this girl on. Let's find out. Was she born a dog and she attracted to dogs? Does she feel like she's a dog's spirit and a human body. We don't know. But before we put her on, I do have my dogs upper here that I use when the dogs annoying me at home. Yeah, I'll play it to you before we put her on. Just listen to this. Can you hear that?
Yeah, we can hear that. What's that supposed to do?
It shuts the dogs. So if they start barking, I pointed at them, there's the word, and they stoping instantly, stop barking. It doesn't hurt them, it doesn't do anything. It just shuts them up.
You know that's amazing. Where'd you get that from?
By the way, it was one of our products. One of our product reviews that.
Never made it onto because you know why, no dog that day?
Remember right, I think that did happen.
Yes, no dog, no proof, we forgot Okay, so you're going to use that during the interview to see if it's just like if she.
Really is a dog inside, she'll respond when she hears it, or she'll instantly stop talking. But let's meet her. Her name is strangely enough, she's she's a dog, but her name is me ow. Hello, me ow, good morning, good morning.
Here are you.
Like a cat? But I am a dog? I know?
Did you call yourself me Why did you call yourself me ow?
Then?
And you know, it's kind of like whenever you have a really small dog, like a chihuahua and you name it hercules or you know, so.
You're so I thought maybe you're going to be batshit crazy, but you seem quite like pleasant and normal. Looking at you, your beautiful young woman. What's with the what? What what do you mean you think you're a dog? Tell us what's going on there? What?
What?
What are you actually feeling? Well?
I think that the wonder that comes with play and just being enchanted with life around you is a beautiful thing. And I'm not sure if I ever put two and two together that I had to stop that whenever I became an adult. In fact, I kind of figured that once I make my own money, pay my own rent, well, I can extra do anything that I want. And I wanted to be a dog.
And what do you Because I heard that you sleep in a cage, a dog cage at night.
It's kind of hot.
Cage and what yeah, tell me about that?
I have pastel blankets and pastel pillows in there, and something about being in a confined space.
You know.
I don't know if it makes me feel safe from the world or makes me feel like the world is safe from me. But bring comfort?
What is it?
Is it the length the full length of you or you having to curl up inside the cage?
It can fit me. The rule of some with a dog is if they can stand up in their cage, then it's big enough for them. And do you do as long as I'm on all fours standing up?
Do you have a boyfriend? I have hands dog friend?
You have what.
Handlers?
Handlers like?
Yes?
What does that person do exactly?
They feed me, they take me on walks, we practice training, which is one of my favorite things because I get treats.
And what treats do you get?
Sometimes shredded chickens, sometimes jerky, sometimes dog biscuits.
It really just depends on do you eat dog food?
Sometimes? Yes?
Do you do you like that?
You know it's a little bland. I like to put bone broth or some other additives in there, similar to I don't know if you're familiar with crazy pet parents wanting to feed their pets raw diets or kind of adding some fun stuff in there. That's kind of more.
Does the dog? Does the dog handler have sex with you?
No?
He doesn't, do you any one? I'm sorry, I feel bad asking that question all of a sudden.
You no, No, what's your normal sex? You related? Do you have a I just assume the handler was like some weird way of saying boyfriend, did your.
You know, like a dom?
What are the handlers? How many are they?
There's about two to three that come over regularly?
And do you pay them?
I don't. It's funny. I don't have to pay anybody to spend time with me.
So who are these people to be your handler?
Friends? And just being honest about my interests and realizing that I have other friends that have similar interests, and you really.
Believe that you're.
Maybe you enjoy it? Do you enjoy it?
Or is it?
Or is it? Are you the soul of the dog? What would just help us through that? Because you know, we're just normal people. We don't understand the well what is normal?
You know, we don't like to use that word really these days, but yeah, talk us through like do you you don't actually believe you're a dog?
But Carl made a good point, is it the soul that believes it's a dog?
Yeah?
I believe that in everybody there is a primal animal inside of it everybody, and it's a part of our humanity. And it's kind of interesting. I feel acknowledging my primal animalistic side of the way that I am almost makes me feel a little more, a little more human sometimes.
And do you.
That's what I wanted to know? Oh?
Sometimes it depends on how It depends on what I'm running after.
So if you running after a ball, do you run on all falls?
Absolutely?
Do you do that in the park? Like do people give you funny looks?
You know?
I don't find myself focusing on what other people I guess are their reactions towards me because I'm so in the moment of just chasing the ball, being the dog. I want to you know, sit and perform for whoever it is. Uh, you know is my focus?
Yeah, that's good.
When when when when you do have sex, is it only doggy style or do you do human things?
Believe it or not?
I do.
I have I know a lot of tricks, and so I do a lot of things, and uh, the dog side of me, it's an everyday lifestyle. So I find myself not really needing that in the bedroom.
At all, needing what which part.
Any any kind of dog behavior, Like so.
That guy's out the way, Yeah, yeah, because that'd be a whole trip to get imagine just of like trying to get his hit around that.
Like, what what are the things do you do that a dog?
Like? Oh gosh, I bark? I yeah, every I mean everything. I whenever I hang out with my friends, I sit on the floor, they pet my head.
Non po do you poo in the backyard or is that? Is that just that I don't need to be stupid about it. I'm just fascinated by this sometimes.
I have before typically though you know it's either raining or something, so I gotta get over myself, and I got to use the human toilet, I guess.
So if you go out into the backyard and you do a poop, do you bring toilet paper or do you wipe it on the grass?
Oh? You drag your ass along the grass like those dogs do when they've got the worms.
Yeah, I'm a big drag fan.
Yeap, Holy that's insane, and that's fantastic and and so sorry, what else were you saying? You do like a dog? So you chase up on the floor.
You know how dogs love to lick feet of humans.
Oh, don't tell me, are you?
Oh, dude, I don't know about feet, but I have an oral fixation for sure, and I like to chew on hands quite a lot.
Sign your friend and I come over for a coffee, you'll be on the floor and you might start chewing my hand mid conversation. Yeah.
If if you're petting my head and you know, I go to sniff your hand and you don't full away, then why not give a little nipple?
She is an actual dog. Hey, I'm going to chest this out. What happens when I hit this thing? Dereact I don't like that.
I didn't like that.
What was that dog? It's a dog controller.
I don't like that.
Quick she she's pulling the phone away. She's an actual dog.
I think you have been a dog in a past life.
This is a hot I mean smoking hot. The shit's in the backyard and is living life like a dog. It's a miracle. It's a miracle, it is. I'm fascinating.
Oh my god. I can I ask you what you've done to your nose because in all the pictures you've got pink on your nose, but you've got it here now on zoom. Is if you've done something permanent to make your end of your nose pink.
Like a dog.
I haven't. I typically just use you know, eyeshadow like anybody else. But the I'm telling you, dude, it's almost like I was meant to be a dog because the way that my nose is shaped, I have that those flat features. The hole I do is just put a little pink there in there, and suddenly it just looks as it should.
Yeah.
Can I ask one more dog associated question? When you meet a new person, do you shake hands or do you start sniffing the anus hole? Because that's what.
Dogs do, right, yes, well yeah, but luckily I am a dog girl, so I know how to ask for consent when needed.
So you will sniff and ass, but you ask for consent because that's the way of the world. Yeah.
Play, And what does your park sound like?
What is my boat?
Yeah? What does it sound like?
That's quite as that sounds more ferocious.
I was thinking it would be more like a little choo or see identifies as a Dalmatian.
Right, ah, that is Dalmatian like.
They do by yeah.
Yeah.
Oh they bite yeah, yeah, okay, do you Yeah?
Of course nibble, nibble or bite hard.
But I bite hard, but typically I'm corrected if I bite too hard, so I have muzzled.
And things that.
Do guys say to you, like if you're being annoying? Did they do that season alarm thing? Like do you react to that? Do you react to that sort of thing or not? Really?
Oh?
Yeah, I I do not. I am.
I feel it in my bones whenever somebody looks at me and they and they're like, hey, could.
It Oh my god, it like you put in the line, Yeah, you could be that.
You could really be the perfect woman. As far as I'm concerned.
Is that what you want?
Voice controlled responds to the dogs beep, like I know there's some household guys out there that would think this is the greatest woman on earth. But she is a human being, but leaves like a dog, quite a mirror. It's quite a fascinating story.
You know, if you're happy, then so be it.
Then who cares? That's right, Hey, fascinating to meet you. Thanks for coming on.
Of course, of course for having you the lovely day, and I.
Hope to maybe sniff or ass one day if we have met each other. That's right, Thanks me out. I appreciate Wow. Look at any questions, guys, and what are you guys? Cooper? What do you think of that chick? She's crazy, right, it's crazy cool. Yeah.
I started off very skeptical and now I'm loving it.
I'm really loving it now.
I wonder if she's got an only fans. We should have asked her she's got only fans?
Do you have only fans?
I think she's she's still there.
Oh no, I don't have only fans. I never have and I never will.
Well, because they don't allow dogs.
I don't think I've seen plenty of dogs on that thing. It's full of dogs.
I love it.
It's necessary to fetishize myself.
That's right.
I'm only weird enough.
Yeah, at me out one more thing.
I feel they give it a go. Roll the dice on that. It's big money to be made there.
I feel crazy, isn't it?
Well?
Jackie, maybe Jackie in how she goes through fads Pedro, maybe Jackie will turn into a dog next week. We're pretty close. He's a hot dog. Okay O, you stand by for that, and don't forget tomorrow. We're doing a massive blitz of pink concert tickets for Saturday. Show details not tomorrow at Kids Kale.
And Jaggier, Carl, Carl and Jagger.
I noticed on the phone a computer here. Normally, if someone's called in before, they fill in their details and it says their name and their age and their suburb, and on this particular line it just says and and and and oh a big no. So I was so fascinated because it's void of any other information. I'm going to pick it up and see what's going on. Good morning, Hello, who's this? Hello?
Hello, Hi, hey, Hi, what's your name?
My name is Claude claud All for I'm calling for the show ticket?
Yeah, and what else did you say to our phone? Operettas just before?
I actually I was not speaking to anyone.
I know. This is this, This is a previous we I just picked it up that produces grab it.
Okay.
For some reason, they've written no on where your name is supposed to be, as if someone has tried to ban you from winning.
Anything, which you do occasion. Have you ever been on air with us?
No?
I haven't, And what you're cutting out?
Maybe that's why it's no?
Okay?
Yea? Does anyone know who this woman is and why she's seems to be banned? And even though I've told everyone no one's ever banned here. We never ban anyone here.
We'll chat to the other shows because we use the same phone lines as every show on this station.
So they.
Okay, gotcha?
Yeah, because she's never been on air, so you wouldn't.
Think that would have a little black mark against her name.
You know what. I don't like banning. Pete used to ban people just for no particular reason, and everyone it was like a subculture of like gatekeepers here. So we outlawed that and said, no chance, that's right, No way we're getting involved in that even over at Nova you know fits in Whippers show, Well Whipper you might remember a few months ago he had to like apparently get an a v O out against someone that was his stalker, that was constantly making contact showing up. So yeah, and then so that woman was told like, I think she got out of it with court, And I thought, this poor woman, she had the av Oh, she's not allowed to contact fits In Whipper, and I thought I could never turn away a listener. So I've got Bruno to reach out to the woman and we invited her to the Australian Idol and we gave her the full backstage to her and I'd put her up.
Yeah, you.
Stalker.
What she's seeing Whipper that she didn't see in me? And if he doesn't want her, let me reach out. So we put her up in my chair. We got photos.
And has she started stalking you yet?
No?
Because I was using Bruno as a proxy. She seems to have fixated heavily on Bruno now and Bruno's she wants to go to the show with Bruno and she wants to go lunch and how many times a day Bruno would you hear from that, come over to the micro. How often would you hear from her?
Probably around twenty or so, twenty times times, about twenty.
But she's lovely, isn't she. She's actually a sweetheart. She never when I met her, she didn't say anything, no words were spoken. I think she was She's no fan of mine though, right, That's why she was a Whipper. She was obsessed with Whipper and I don't get it. We was a nice guy. But what is she sexually obsessed with him? Or what was it?
I think it was something like that, because from what I remember, she got into trouble for creating like a baby doll, like a newborn baby, and sending it to Whipper and saying, I designed it so that it half looks like you and half looks like me.
Now, what an effort. No fan has ever gone to that effort for me, And yet Whipper he doesn't embrace that. So anyway, it didn't work.
But Bruno's was this baby other dolls all stitched together, so it looks yes, yes.
Other other dolls all stitch together.
Yeah, so you're wanting that, that's what you're wanting, like you want you voted to you that they would stitch together other parts of dolls to make.
Show up on and noun. I just why have I got notes? You've had stalkers, whippers.
Had you have never had a stalker, have you?
I think maybe I may. I might be a bit fearful for those stalker types.
That's so interesting that you've never had one.
Yeah, maybe I'm just not the type that has the stork.
This is what?
So now you're going chasing after stalkers and there's stalking you.
No, but they're so stalking Bruno.
I've told her I have a wife, and she's like, yeah, cool, So do you want to come to Aqua with me?
What are you married?
Or with the concept?
Yeah? The concept? Yeah, are you going to go? No? We looked online and we saw that there weren't any tickets available that sold out. Oh wow, what I could probably get you some tickets if you really want to do that's all good. Tell her I can get her tickets.
Yeah.
I might not be able to the object of her new desire, but I can get those tickets. As a matter of fact, i'd driver there in the rolls Royce if she wanted to go. I feel like you're stork stalker.
The stalker.
Now, okay, yeah, maybe year. I think you're right, maybe I've maybe I've sunk into this.
Too deep understand against you.
Now Now I like with her, he's a nice guy, but is he stalkable? I think no, he's not stalkable.
You're so jealous that he's got a stalker, and like you're thinking, why haven't I? Yeah, yeah, all right, Well i'll do something you.
Should we bring it? Should we bring this stalker in one day?
If you want to ask her, like, what's wrong of me?
I really want to look into the I want I want this stalking to be our stalker, not ow yours.
I don't want you.
Yeah, I was. I was just trying to get your name into it. So maybe it'd make it a bit more attractive to do this walking since me on my own, me putting her in my idle seat, the judging seat. Everyone was cheering and I was making a big deal. Not one word was said to me. Didn't even look at me, didn't even glance, just sort of shuffled up, sat in the chair and was shuffled out. God, you gotta don't tell me you've got a stalker, Gordy.
Have you?
I'm just this lovely lady has been sending me some things to.
You. You got a dollar? Hang on, how many dolls? This bitch making? Why am I getting a doll? What did what did you get? Gordy?
But she wanted me to do some live reads. I think she seems lovely, but like the doll just doesn't. I think she wanted to give one to my daughter.
And I just I didn't know.
Is this a stalker or a doll? Is this woman that owns Mattel? Is it the same person?
Yeah, it's definitely the same person. I'm not quite sure what her business is.
Can I show you a photo of her without actually putting it on out in broadcast, just so you can tell me? Is this is that her? I can confirm that is her.
So she's stalking everyone but you.
Basically, I've sacked everything for this show, and yet she's chosen the Gordys and the Whippers to invest her time in. Maybe she thought I was too much of a prize and she was managing your expectations.
Yeah it could be that, you know.
Right, I'm like a supermodel, unachievable to the average stalker. She did listen to yesterday's show, did she yeah, how do you know?
She mentioned it to me and I asked her what she liked about the show, and she said she really likes the music.
Jesus Christ is going to be an uphill battle. I feel it's not going to be easy.
Let's what does it take for you to want to stalk Kyle?
Yeah, and let me know when she's coming in so I can wear some sexy little shorts and stuff like that. Maybe I need to get up the sex in it. I don't know, Cooper, have you got any shorts that will fit me? There's a little tiny football short. Hopefully I can get a size to fit you.
Can you please? Because he needs to turn it on for this girl. I don't know what.
Yeah, they're really short and they sort of go up like a like a vagina side like shape.
On the side of the.
Yeah, that's what I want.
What size would you be here?
Again? Let's talk about that off the air, no need for humiliation. At the end of the.
Show, Alfie wants to also say something. Go on, Alfie, I think the.
Big net tat Yeah, very impressive.
Are you excited about it?
You like it?
Yeah? I am? I do. Actually, I think you look like a bad us.
Well, I've got something to say about it. Only lying, sorry Coyle, only lying?
Is it a fake?
It's a fake. It's an absolute fake.
I just got it.
Only just got it for the Australian Tatoo Expo for this weekend.
Are you are you thinking about? Can you turn your finger off the button so I don't hear feedback feedback feedback to you? Bad feedback feedback? Thank you?
You ever thought maybe you're a bit mental, Kyle? I would just maybe implore people to listen to the last seven minutes of the show and then come to your own judgment.
But anyway, go on, What's what's happened that I've something happened? I haven't realized.
Well, you're trying to get a stalker, and you're jealous of somebody else having the stalker that you want, and you're doing anything you can to get this stalker to stalk you. And yeah, when things go wrong, your reaction to them is very over the top.
Well, I would have thought, everyone here working on the biggest radio show in the country, if you could hear it echoing back, you'd at least take your finger off the bat. It's very simple. Shit.
So Alphie the neck tat. It's not real. When does that come off?
Then?
Both in three days? I want to go out.
I don't know if because they don't let a lot of people into places with necktats, do they.
I've got to cover and everything, like I'm too hot, Like I'll be.
Sec just put some to concealer of it. Yeah, I can't believe that was the worst only line ever. Yeah, really testing it out? Are you gonna get tats? Or is it you just doing a big joke here?
No?
No, no man, my dad will kick me under the house.
No way. Okay, okay, Well that's that's very low quality as far as the only line goes. That's not you know, we used to do only lines when we'd get like the Madden Boys, you know, the good Charlotte. We'd bring them in in a chauffeur driven vehicle, but we'd get fake police car to pull them over and pull nine kilo bricks out of the back boot of coke and arrest them on the streets. Then we'd go only lying, this ship is rubbish good to find? Oh did you only lying? That's not funny? Ship. We're telling you we're gonna have to have a meeting before we do this Melbourne launch. Seriously, it's a lot of pressure and work more on that stalk and we've got a lot to do. We've got to go, we've got a lot to do it behind the scenes and Jackie O
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