The Daily Show: Ears EditionSports War: 2024 Olympics | Investigating America’s Gerontocracy
Ronny Chieng and Michael Kosta argue over the 2024 Paris Games, including Lebron James’s role in winning the gold, Noah Lyles’ competing with Covid, and Australia B-girl, Raygun’s jaw-dropping moves. Also, Grace Kuhlenschmidt chats with UC Irvine neuropolitics researcher Mark Fisher to understand the consequences of a gerontocracy and what’s really on a cognitive test.
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Tunny.
Late four Olympics just ended with the traditional Tom cruise jumping off the building. For a full recap of the beauty and grace of the games, we turn to Sports War.
What move on care.
The old reason we watched doing it?
What's up, idiots?
I'm right Jang and I'm Michael Costa.
This is Sports War, the show where we are legally not allowed to agree with each other. So if I say I love Begets, then I say few croissants for life. And if I say that the best French new wave director is Gudar, well, then.
I say you Truefo's movies were justice revolutionary, but more accessible to a white audience.
Is shut the philistine. Now that the twenty twenty.
Four Paris Olympics are over, you'll probably miss watching women's beach volleyball every day in your office.
Learn how to knock Ronnie.
But another highlight was the utter dominance of USA men's basketball.
Lebron James, Kevin Durant, and Steph Curry teaming up in a thrilling gold medal game against host country France winning by eleven points is.
Everything I imagine and more. We all sign up for this mission to continue the USA basketball dominance.
That's right, suck at France, pack your bags and go back to.
Wherever it is that you came from. This just proves.
America is the best at the sports that we invent.
Costa, are you drooling more on? America?
Should be embarrassed that you only beat Friends by eleven points.
You basically lost.
That score should have been two seventy to twent These players shouldn't even be allowed back in the country. Hey Lebron James, you stay in France. You think about what you just did.
Ronnie, Ronnie, I swear putting you on TV feels like a make a wish.
All right.
Not only did Steph and Lebron dominate, but they found a way to make it entertaining against a weak opponent. And believe me, it takes real skill to put on a great show, even when you're out there with a smaller, inferior co host cols up.
You're the tyrese hallybutton of this team. Okay, only one pizzan of a audience even knows who you are.
Well, you're like the send river just filled with diarrhea, which brings us to Tar Costa's Big Balls Better than Night, Which river will Ronnie Chang mysteriously drown It as always brought to you by gambling.
Remember you're not you when you're not gambling.
Moving on to an unexpected Olympic showdown, it was the return of the world's fastest man against the world's fastest virus.
It was supposed to be a golden moment for US sprinter Noah Lyles space, but instead, the twenty seven year old failed to take the lead in the two hundred meter event, finishing with a bronze medal. He embraced fellow racers before he knelt to the ground, appearing to struggle for Brett. After the race, Lyles revealed he tested positive for COVID two days earlier, but decided to still compete.
What an incredible accomplishment for no Allows and an incredible embarrassment for the people who trained every day for four years and lost to a guy with fluid in his lungs. Yeah, why don't you just keep running off the track and runing the traffish Ronnie, Ronnie, like my negative COVID test this morning.
You couldn't be more wrong. This was an absolute disaster for the whole world.
He won an Olympic medal with COVID in ruin the last ballid excuse we all had to miss work. Your shitty boss is going to be like, if no Liles can run two hundred meters with COVID, then you got.
To keep teaching these CPR classes.
So Ronnie's bigg balls bet of the evening, which disease will Michael Costla get next?
Brought to you by gambling?
Gambling, it will fix everything. Let's move on to the athlete from Downtown to that everyone is talking about and should to be. This year's most popular Halloween costume.
Is Australian breaker Reagun went viral for her memorable routine.
Rachel Gunn, the big girl from Australia, failed to score a single point during her Olympics competition, going ahead to have with some of the world's best breakers during the sports Olympic debut.
Her signature moves include the Sprinkler and the Kangaroo hop. Reagan actually has a PhD in breakdance and was Australia's only woman to qualify for the Olympics.
Wow, thank you Australia. That was inspirational.
Yeah, yep, she's the Australian breakdancing Jamaica Bob's led team of the French Olympics. She was so bad with so much confidence. Some experts are speculating that she had Ronnie Chang syndrome.
I hope that took This guy shoots you in your stupid face, right, this was This was a terrible moment for the Olympics, for Australia, for descendants of criminals, for dancers, for kangaroos, for white people that want to be black. It just shows you the pathetic level of talent in Australia.
You fit in perfectly cause of the.
Whole foot fit in a country of tall, tan, hot people. And I say good time, my Finally, as we say goodbye to the Paris Olympics, let's take a look at the final medal count who look at that one hundred and twenty six medals in the United States has clearly won the Olympics.
USA. Oh, but wait, oh no, what's that? Singapore is only one one medal? Hey, Ronnie, where did you grow up a costa?
You'll be a dig in that French poll votels actual dick right. If you factor in population size, the US actually finished fifty nineth in medals pla capita, and by that that trig you know, bobolled almost fifty times better than the US.
Granada, Ronnie, you idiot, it's pronounced Canada.
Learn the language.
Bringing us two our free ball in College Fund Quadrupler bet of the evening Which country that Ronnie grew up in will embarrass themselves to the twenty twenty eight Olympics brought to you by gambling.
It's not an addiction if you win, all right, well a lot of time.
Join us next time on sportswear Well, we're gonna.
Debate if Simone Miles is so good? Why isn't she taller?
You're taller?
You saw.
Hi Late Night Show.
We love the eighteen to thirty five demographic. You guys rock turn off your ad blockers. You're missing a lot of great stuff. But did you know that there are some people who are older than that, and a lot of those people run the country. It's called jarontocracy and Gray school, and Schmidt found out more.
America's democracy may not be the strongest, but at least it's the oldest.
There seems to be some sort of gerontocracy.
We have the oldest leaders among rich countries, and we.
Love all of them.
Joe Biden, Donald Trump, this guy for are their drawbacks to having our leadership? With one foot in heaven? I spoke to Mark Fisher, neuropolitics researcher at UC Irvine.
We know the brain function tends to deteriorate with aging. One of the first to go of all the cognitive functions is called executive function. It's decision making. And what can be more important for a political leader than decision making?
What am I to have for freaking lunch?
I'm president of the United States. What the heck am I going to have for lunch?
That's a hard decision, and I hope that I have a burger for lunch. I guess I've had this freaky misconception that old people are wiser and smarter than me, And it feels like what you're telling me is that that's not true and I should never trust them.
Oh, I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that.
No.
I think that the experience that when gains are the course of life extraordinarily important. But there are some measurable cognitive functions that do begin to decline over the age of sixties.
So even though you have more experiences, you are still getting dumber.
I'm a neurologist. Dumb is not a word that we use.
Okay, all right, I'll say it that and don't worry. So having a bunch of old brains in charge might be a bit of a problem, but this wise old neurologist actually has a solution.
Or Neuropolitics Center, we came out with a recommendation that cognitive testing should be done on all politicians, not just older politicians, all politicians.
Woman man can looked.
Unsurprisingly, Trump says he aced his cognitive test already.
If you get it in order, you get extra points.
An individual has given a number of things to remember, and then after a period of time three to five minutes, they're asked to repeat that.
I mean, those aren't hard things to remember, right person.
Mom.
It's only one part of the exam, yeah, thank By itself, it doesn't determine a whole lot. I mean you have to look at the entire exam, and you have to look at.
Them with personality. I mean I have a really good personality.
Absolutely, thank you.
But that's not really that's really not assessed, and no cogniftion doesn't.
Need to be.
Without seeing his test results, we can only guess how well or not well Trump's brain is.
Doing a lot, including obam, I'll.
Tell you what, but it did make me curious, could my brain be president? My name, Grace, my data birth June thirtieth, nineteen ninety five.
This first part of the exam, This isn't scored, so this is just identification material.
Okay, God, I would like to be scored on those two. Actually possible because I think I got them right. Do you have more difficulties doing everyday activities due to thinking problems? No, I have almost nothing to do on a daily basis. At the bottom of the very last page, right, I have finished on the blank line provided.
So this is a test of delayed recall.
Got it? This one is so easy?
Can I call my mom to just double check last question?
In the course of just a few pages, we've covered many cognitive domains.
Sir, Did I pass let's hear it.
Brother, come on, come on, you got it.
Look now, if only someone could go to Washington and get our elected leaders to take this test. You fine, I'll do it.
Hello, Hey, how you doing? You see it?
You too?
My name is Grace A.
Maxwell.
I'm looking for a congress person.
Well I am a congressman.
So who does like your your botox or your work? You look incredible?
Okay, do you appreciate it? I'm actually twenty seven.
Yes, most junior congress Person Maxwell Frost is the only person who would talk to me for this story. So how would you feel about having a cognitive test required for politicians?
I don't think we should have that.
Okay, why not you worried you'd failed it?
What is a cognitive test? For example?
I can show you one. Yeah, what are these?
A rhino and a harp?
Congratulations, sir, you get to keep your position. They told me that if you screw this up that this office would be mine.
I'll be honest, I have to thank for like just two seconds about what animal that was?
Yeah? Of course, In this baby politician's view, the issue with politics isn't old brains, it's the lack of young ones.
I do think it's an issue that, yeah, young people aren't as represented. I don't think we should like boot out all the old people and just have young people running.
So you're not agist.
I'm not an agist.
When do you feel like you would retire?
I don't know what I would retire, but I do think we need term moments.
Do you think if you stay in Congress for thirty four years you'll be able to bring Congress to term limits.
Because of how this place works. Maybe, but my hopee will have it way before that.
So it's not hopeless. We just need our young politicians to stick around until they'll be able to change the system, however long it takes.
You know what, I.
Think I'll vote for you. You can't.
Why not?
Because I live in Orlando. I represent Orlando, Florida. If you move to Orlando, I could.
Go on a paid business trip to Disney World. Leave my vote there.
Yeah, yeah, that's illegal.
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