Shifting our family’s mindset from ownership to stewardship, from entitlement to gratitude, and promoting sacrifice and service will take consistency, commitment, and care. It is a process, but we are not alone. We partner with the Holy Spirit and prayerfully ask the Lord to guide and direct us as we seek to honor Him and all we say and do. 

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Full Transcript Below:

Shifting Our Family’s Mindset

By: Laura Bailey

“give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18 NIV

“Why can’t we go to an ice cream place after school? It’s been over a week since we’ve gone!”

“Why can’t I buy those new shoes? I only have two pairs of sneakers; these are different!”

“ Why does it matter that I left my new jacket at school? If something happens to it, we will just get a new one.”

“Why can’t we get take-out? We never get to eat out!”

Over the last month, my girls complained often about my husband and me not meeting their expectations. I was beyond frustrated at their lack of appreciation; it didn’t matter what we did for them, they were still ungrateful.

 I shared my frustration with a group of mom friends the next day with nodding heads; many others shared similar stories. “We want to provide for our children, give them opportunities, and make their lives enjoyable and comfortable. But how do we do that while preventing a sense of entitlement and fostering genuine gratitude?” one mom asked the group.

Even among the body of believers who strive to guard their hearts against excess consumerism and are dedicated to giving back to the Lord and sharing their wealth, the reality is that our resources are abundant for many. There’s nothing wrong with having a career that provides financial stability or providing our families with experiences and resources to make their lives easier and better. The problem is when our hearts and minds shift from stewardship to ownership.

What is the difference between stewardship and ownership?

Stewardship is when we are responsible for caring for something that belongs to someone else. Ownership is full possession; it is entirely ours to do what we wish. As Christians, we acknowledge that everything comes from God and are s simply stewards of His gifts ( John 3:27). 

When we believe everything belongs to the Lord, it guides us as we decide how to spend our time and money. As stewards and not owners, we ask ourselves, “Is the best use of  God’s resources?” While Scripture is not against wealth, having nice things, or even living a comfortable life, it does admonish us to be on guard against storing earthly treasures (Matthew 6:19-21). It places the responsibility of caring for those in need on us (Proverbs 22:9).

If we find that we are clinging tightly to financial security or personal comfort, if we lack an attitude of gratitude, then we have shifted from stewardship to ownership. Graciously, if we ask God to examine our hearts, He will help us as we move back towards His desires for our life ( Psalm 129:23-34). 

Setting the Example

Have you heard the term, “It’s not what’s taught but what’s caught?” Our children are impacted more by how we live our lives than by the mini-sermons, lessons, and general advice we share. We shouldn’t neglect to speak Truth over them, but all will be lost if we don’t “practice what we preach.”

I often feel the tug to complain about making dinner at home when it would be so much easier to eat out and flop on the sofa afterward rather than having to make and clean up a meal. When I see the latest clothing trend I’d love to buy, I have to stop and think about whether it’s wise to purchase it.

We must be hyper-aware that our children are always watching us; they are taking it all in, and as parents, we must not only be hearers of the Word but also doers (James 1:22-25). 

Creating a Mindset of Gratitude

When Paul writes to the Thessalonians, encouraging them to be thankful in all circumstances ( 1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18), he is not ignoring the realities of life in a fallen world, yet reminding them that gratitude is a heart position. As believers, we can wake up daily with thanksgiving because we have the Gospel's good news. We were once in darkness, and now, through the gift of salvation, we can experience eternal life ( 1 Corinthians 5:17-21). 

Shifting our family’s mindset from ownership to stewardship, from entitlement to gratitude, and promoting sacrifice and service will take consistency, commitment, and care. It is a process, but we are not alone. We partner with the Holy Spirit and prayerfully ask the Lord to guide and direct us as we seek to honor Him and all we say and do. 

Intersecting Faith and Life:How can you teach your children to honor God with their resources? Today, read and study Scripture together, filling their hearts and minds with biblical Truths. 

For Further Reading:

An Attitude of Gratitude

5 Things to Do to Have an Attitude of Gratitude