Yesterday's 2pm emergency alert sent Australia into a spin, but not everyone got it, prompting Christian to launch a few conspiracy theories.

Plus, it's Monday Winner or Loser, Patsy's household appliances are dropping like flies, Rio reveals his crush on the local postie, and Christian recaps his unforgettable book launch weekend.

The team also celebrate the ultimate signs you're an adult with a massive toaster giveaway, and play At Work Time Waster with hilarious bird-themed band names.