Wake that ass up in the morning. The Breakfast Club Morning.

Wake that ass up in the morning. The Breakfast Club Morning.

Everybody's theej Envy, Jess, Hilarry, Chlamine, the God. We are the Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in the building. Come on now, we have Sarah Jake Roberts.

Everybody's theej Envy, Jess, Hilarry, Chlamine, the God. We are the Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in the building. Come on now, we have Sarah Jake Roberts.

Welcome, Thank you.

Welcome, Thank you.

How are you feeling.

How are you feeling.

I feel good. I'm a little tired, but I'm glad to be here.

I feel good. I'm a little tired, but I'm glad to be here.

Okay, you always dressed in nice you.

Okay, you always dressed in nice you.

Got a starlist, I do, okay.

Got a starlist, I do, okay.

Jason Bowling, Yeah, we've been working together for almost ten years.

Jason Bowling, Yeah, we've been working together for almost ten years.

Okay. I thought you was just praying and putting it together yourself.

Okay. I thought you was just praying and putting it together yourself.

But the new book, Power Moves ignite your confidence and become a force.

But the new book, Power Moves ignite your confidence and become a force.

Where did the inspiration for the book come from?

Where did the inspiration for the book come from?

It really started about five years ago.

It really started about five years ago.

Whenever I had finished speaking, people would always tell me like, that was so powerful, You're so powerful. But I didn't really feel powerful, like I'd be in the fight of my life up there. And I started just asking God, like what does it mean to truly be powerful? And I feel like God just revealed to me that it has so much to do with obedience and authenticity, but not only that, that power is a flow and so what makes me powerful when I'm preaching is different than what makes me.

Whenever I had finished speaking, people would always tell me like, that was so powerful, You're so powerful. But I didn't really feel powerful, like I'd be in the fight of my life up there. And I started just asking God, like what does it mean to truly be powerful? And I feel like God just revealed to me that it has so much to do with obedience and authenticity, but not only that, that power is a flow and so what makes me powerful when I'm preaching is different than what makes me.

Powerful as a mother.

Powerful as a mother.

So I started digging into the fluidity of power and this notion that power moves and embracing that from season to season really started resonating with me.

So I started digging into the fluidity of power and this notion that power moves and embracing that from season to season really started resonating with me.

I saw you preaching yesterday and you said something to the extent of being in control is not power. Control is not power. Yeah, what does that mean?

I saw you preaching yesterday and you said something to the extent of being in control is not power. Control is not power. Yeah, what does that mean?

Okay, So whenever we lose our sense of safety, I think our initial response is to try and control as much as we can after that, instead of really surrendering to whatever the moment is trying to teach us and discovering the power, the wisdom, the lessons, and that we control it. And as a result of that, we end up closing ourselves out, not just from whatever God's trying to teach us in the moment, but sometimes dynamic relationships that can be helpful to us. And so balancing this idea of vulnerability and openness so that power can flow through us I think should be the goal of anyone who really wants to affect change in the world.

Okay, So whenever we lose our sense of safety, I think our initial response is to try and control as much as we can after that, instead of really surrendering to whatever the moment is trying to teach us and discovering the power, the wisdom, the lessons, and that we control it. And as a result of that, we end up closing ourselves out, not just from whatever God's trying to teach us in the moment, but sometimes dynamic relationships that can be helpful to us. And so balancing this idea of vulnerability and openness so that power can flow through us I think should be the goal of anyone who really wants to affect change in the world.

I do have a coquesse. This is going to sound stupid, but I just want people to understand, you know, where you came from and how you got into faith. I know you were here last time. So for people that said it, so for people that don't know that, they automatically assume that your dad was in it is into religion, that's what got you into it. But you had a different start with you. So let's talk about that a little bit first. How did you start and how did you get to where you're at now? And the fact that you had your first child at fourteen and let's let's break that all down.

I do have a coquesse. This is going to sound stupid, but I just want people to understand, you know, where you came from and how you got into faith. I know you were here last time. So for people that said it, so for people that don't know that, they automatically assume that your dad was in it is into religion, that's what got you into it. But you had a different start with you. So let's talk about that a little bit first. How did you start and how did you get to where you're at now? And the fact that you had your first child at fourteen and let's let's break that all down.

And he's in the studio. Don't give him that much gas.

And he's in the studio. Don't give him that much gas.

That's a child over there. Yeah.

That's a child over there. Yeah.

So my dad has been in ministry my whole life and growing up when I was growing up in church, like we were at church every single day of the week, and you either found this spot, you were in the choir, you were dancing, you were doing something, or you were like me and you were sitting in the corner somewhere. And I can remember my siblings telling me, like, you're gonna go to hell, like you can shout, you can't clap, like you gonna go to hell. And I was like, you might be right, because what I'm listening to on the radio likes resonating with me, it doesn't align with what's being preached, and so I never really felt like I had a sense of belonging within faith. And then when my father's ministry kind of took off, I didn't know where I fit within the dynamic of our family at all. And so I tried to find myself at thirteen year old, trying to find herself is gonna be open to anything, and so I got pregnant at thirteen. I had my son at fourteen, which just further confirmed to me, like, you not wanted the good girls. And so I spent probably ten years of my life just being like, all right, faith isn't for me, guys, not for me. I'm gonna figure out what's happening outside. And I got to this space after this traumatic experience in my first marriage where I almost got arrested and I was defending the right to keep my kids, and I was like, I have tried literally everything, I might as well just try faith. And I wasn't trying to build a platform. I was trying to build myself. And I started blogging about all of my experiences, and it turns out that there were like other women who felt maybe forgotten by church, felt like because they didn't.

So my dad has been in ministry my whole life and growing up when I was growing up in church, like we were at church every single day of the week, and you either found this spot, you were in the choir, you were dancing, you were doing something, or you were like me and you were sitting in the corner somewhere. And I can remember my siblings telling me, like, you're gonna go to hell, like you can shout, you can't clap, like you gonna go to hell. And I was like, you might be right, because what I'm listening to on the radio likes resonating with me, it doesn't align with what's being preached, and so I never really felt like I had a sense of belonging within faith. And then when my father's ministry kind of took off, I didn't know where I fit within the dynamic of our family at all. And so I tried to find myself at thirteen year old, trying to find herself is gonna be open to anything, and so I got pregnant at thirteen. I had my son at fourteen, which just further confirmed to me, like, you not wanted the good girls. And so I spent probably ten years of my life just being like, all right, faith isn't for me, guys, not for me. I'm gonna figure out what's happening outside. And I got to this space after this traumatic experience in my first marriage where I almost got arrested and I was defending the right to keep my kids, and I was like, I have tried literally everything, I might as well just try faith. And I wasn't trying to build a platform. I was trying to build myself. And I started blogging about all of my experiences, and it turns out that there were like other women who felt maybe forgotten by church, felt like because they didn't.

Do you feel that way, like, especially because your dad was in ministry, did you feel like his church forgot about you, especially that being your dad.

Do you feel that way, like, especially because your dad was in ministry, did you feel like his church forgot about you, especially that being your dad.

And it's hard, like knowing what I know now, it's hard to say because I felt so much shame from having a teen pregnancy that I'm sure that there were people who were like still loving on me, but I couldn't cut through the idea of like during purity culture, the height of purity culture, you didn't got pregnant like this. It just doesn't align. And I don't know because even my father is surprised that my life has turned in this direction. So I'm not sure if anyone thought that I was going to be the girl talking about Jesus. But I tried it for myself and I started sharing it with like these other misfits, and it turns out there were a lot of us, like back Row churchgoers who were there because we had to be but didn't fit in. And I was able to give them a voice and a language through trying to find my own voice and language, and it's resonated with them.

And it's hard, like knowing what I know now, it's hard to say because I felt so much shame from having a teen pregnancy that I'm sure that there were people who were like still loving on me, but I couldn't cut through the idea of like during purity culture, the height of purity culture, you didn't got pregnant like this. It just doesn't align. And I don't know because even my father is surprised that my life has turned in this direction. So I'm not sure if anyone thought that I was going to be the girl talking about Jesus. But I tried it for myself and I started sharing it with like these other misfits, and it turns out there were a lot of us, like back Row churchgoers who were there because we had to be but didn't fit in. And I was able to give them a voice and a language through trying to find my own voice and language, and it's resonated with them.

What level of ratchet were you on a scale?

What level of ratchet were you on a scale?

It like, well, well, at the end of the day, the day's got to end. I don't know, I don't I don't even know how to answer that question. But I mean I was not I was not outside, like I was not trying.

It like, well, well, at the end of the day, the day's got to end. I don't know, I don't I don't even know how to answer that question. But I mean I was not I was not outside, like I was not trying.

To be the good girl at all.

To be the good girl at all.

Like I embraced this idea of like, you can just do your own thing and try anything. So I mean I did quite a few things.

Like I embraced this idea of like, you can just do your own thing and try anything. So I mean I did quite a few things.

It's interesting to hear you say the bishop was surprised to see how things turned out, because I'm sure him and you know, the first Lady was.

It's interesting to hear you say the bishop was surprised to see how things turned out, because I'm sure him and you know, the first Lady was.

Praying over you and asking God to turn you around. It would makes sense.

Praying over you and asking God to turn you around. It would makes sense.

Yeah, But I mean I have always been very strong willed. I've always been my own person, and so I think that they were praying. But just like we praying, we like, I don't know if you're gonna answer this prayer. We'll see how it happens. I don't think that they were for sure knowing that things were absolutely going to turn around. Even if they did turn around, I don't think anyone anticipates, like, oh, she's going to be in ministry, because that's not necessarily a turn around, like maybe she'll figure out who God is. But this fact that she's also going to be a ministry in helping others. That was a wild card nobody saw coming.

Yeah, But I mean I have always been very strong willed. I've always been my own person, and so I think that they were praying. But just like we praying, we like, I don't know if you're gonna answer this prayer. We'll see how it happens. I don't think that they were for sure knowing that things were absolutely going to turn around. Even if they did turn around, I don't think anyone anticipates, like, oh, she's going to be in ministry, because that's not necessarily a turn around, like maybe she'll figure out who God is. But this fact that she's also going to be a ministry in helping others. That was a wild card nobody saw coming.

I do have a question, and this is something that we talk about a lot of pearing. Me and my wife been arguing about this, well now argument having a conversation about this. I feel sometimes when, especially when people play with the church right, and I'll tell you why I say play with the church, they come off like a very church holier than that.

I do have a question, and this is something that we talk about a lot of pearing. Me and my wife been arguing about this, well now argument having a conversation about this. I feel sometimes when, especially when people play with the church right, and I'll tell you why I say play with the church, they come off like a very church holier than that.

Right.

Right.

So when they speak, a lot of people actually believe it and listen because they feel like they study, they go through it, they read the Bible, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. But also you realize that person is not a good person. So where do you cross the lines of somebody I would say, taking on an assignment doing something positive. I think you spoke about it earlier, somebody giving a message opposed to who they are as a person. Like can somebody give a message and be an fed up person?

So when they speak, a lot of people actually believe it and listen because they feel like they study, they go through it, they read the Bible, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. But also you realize that person is not a good person. So where do you cross the lines of somebody I would say, taking on an assignment doing something positive. I think you spoke about it earlier, somebody giving a message opposed to who they are as a person. Like can somebody give a message and be an fed up person?

Yeah? I mean a broken clock? It's right twice today, you know what I mean?

Yeah? I mean a broken clock? It's right twice today, you know what I mean?

You don't even have to be a Christian to say something that could be profound and deep, But that doesn't change the fact that you have an opportunity to be more fully integrated in your character. But I think that the message is that resonate the most are from people who are literally walking it out, living it out, and so it does discredit the message sometimes when you're telling me something that you don't live by. But I think about it like this. So I'm a parent, and now that my children are moving into adulthood, I recognize that many of the things that we have told them growing up, they're also realizing that I am figuring it out with them as well. And I don't know that it's a lot different in ministry, like this is where the goal is. I think we all know where the goal is, but I'm still working it out too. I think where people get in trouble is that they're not actually doing the work, Like I'm telling you that this is the goal, and I'm doing the exact opposite of it, Which is why I've tried to be really intentional about being authentic. Like I'm going through depression, I'm going through an anxiety. This is what I'm learning in the midst of that, because it doesn't serve me for me to come off as your God when we all need the same one so I try to really make sure that I'm not on a pedestal.

You don't even have to be a Christian to say something that could be profound and deep, But that doesn't change the fact that you have an opportunity to be more fully integrated in your character. But I think that the message is that resonate the most are from people who are literally walking it out, living it out, and so it does discredit the message sometimes when you're telling me something that you don't live by. But I think about it like this. So I'm a parent, and now that my children are moving into adulthood, I recognize that many of the things that we have told them growing up, they're also realizing that I am figuring it out with them as well. And I don't know that it's a lot different in ministry, like this is where the goal is. I think we all know where the goal is, but I'm still working it out too. I think where people get in trouble is that they're not actually doing the work, Like I'm telling you that this is the goal, and I'm doing the exact opposite of it, Which is why I've tried to be really intentional about being authentic. Like I'm going through depression, I'm going through an anxiety. This is what I'm learning in the midst of that, because it doesn't serve me for me to come off as your God when we all need the same one so I try to really make sure that I'm not on a pedestal.

I try to kick the pedestal down.

I try to kick the pedestal down.

Like you see a preacher. A preacher will be preaching, right, and then he's cheating on his wife. Or a preacher'll be preaching and then he's hitting his wife, you know what I mean. So it's kind of it's like a blurred line.

Like you see a preacher. A preacher will be preaching, right, and then he's cheating on his wife. Or a preacher'll be preaching and then he's hitting his wife, you know what I mean. So it's kind of it's like a blurred line.

Like that's not a blurred line though, that's I mean, that's not like that's wrong, that's wickedness, you know what I mean?

Like that's not a blurred line though, that's I mean, that's not like that's wrong, that's wickedness, you know what I mean?

Like that, how do you how do you to the extreme just now, like cheating on his wife, hit his wife? You see that a lot of time. You see a preacher say I'm sorry, I cheated on my wife. You see that in the church sometimes none of my preachers, but you do see that. So when you see that, it's it's kind of difficult to uphold a preacher. And you'd be like, is this whole ish bullshit or we just playing this game? Or or do you really feel that way and really made a mistake. You understand what I'm saying.

Like that, how do you how do you to the extreme just now, like cheating on his wife, hit his wife? You see that a lot of time. You see a preacher say I'm sorry, I cheated on my wife. You see that in the church sometimes none of my preachers, but you do see that. So when you see that, it's it's kind of difficult to uphold a preacher. And you'd be like, is this whole ish bullshit or we just playing this game? Or or do you really feel that way and really made a mistake. You understand what I'm saying.

Well, I mean, I can't judge someone's heart and I can't judge their experiences. So I'm a little hesitant to really make a judgment on situations.

Well, I mean, I can't judge someone's heart and I can't judge their experiences. So I'm a little hesitant to really make a judgment on situations.

I'm not saying anybody in particular, if well.

I'm not saying anybody in particular, if well.

You know people, I don't. I don't know anyone either who's going through this. But I think people infer a lot. But I will say this, like, preachers are human. So if you are who you are, and you can cheat on your wife, and a preacher can cheat on his wife, like he's a man too, she's a woman too. And so you guys are still going to have the same areas of temptation that you need to overcome. I think your response to that, like, what is my response? How do I grow from here? How do I create boundaries? Do I need to sit down? Do I need to heal?

You know people, I don't. I don't know anyone either who's going through this. But I think people infer a lot. But I will say this, like, preachers are human. So if you are who you are, and you can cheat on your wife, and a preacher can cheat on his wife, like he's a man too, she's a woman too. And so you guys are still going to have the same areas of temptation that you need to overcome. I think your response to that, like, what is my response? How do I grow from here? How do I create boundaries? Do I need to sit down? Do I need to heal?

Like?

Like?

I think how you handle your humanity in the face of this divine call is what's most important. I am careful that pastors don't have a license to do whatever they want to because of the power they hold. I think that you can be human, but all of us need to be try and stretching, growing to be more like Jesus or we are up here playing. I'm not asking you to be perfect. I'm asking you to really be on this walk for real.

I think how you handle your humanity in the face of this divine call is what's most important. I am careful that pastors don't have a license to do whatever they want to because of the power they hold. I think that you can be human, but all of us need to be try and stretching, growing to be more like Jesus or we are up here playing. I'm not asking you to be perfect. I'm asking you to really be on this walk for real.

Who's this white path that you talking about.

Who's this white path that you talking about.

And does he listen to the breakfast Club?

And does he listen to the breakfast Club?

I want it because you're a mother of six and you're busy, extremely busy with your podcast and then writing a book and then traveling.

I want it because you're a mother of six and you're busy, extremely busy with your podcast and then writing a book and then traveling.

How do you balance that?

How do you balance that?

Like mother?

Like mother?

And I know you said your children are growing into adulthood, but how do you balance that?

And I know you said your children are growing into adulthood, but how do you balance that?

Well?

Well?

Yeah, and I feel for you because you got a lot going on. I think it's the message of this book. I think it's really allowing myself to like flow in a different definition of power based off of each of those roles. Because as much as I want to bring the same intensity to everything I do, if I do that, I may end up damaging my children because I'm talking to them like a business partner, and so really defining for myself what does it mean to be powerful in these specific roles and how much capacity do I have to show up.

Yeah, and I feel for you because you got a lot going on. I think it's the message of this book. I think it's really allowing myself to like flow in a different definition of power based off of each of those roles. Because as much as I want to bring the same intensity to everything I do, if I do that, I may end up damaging my children because I'm talking to them like a business partner, and so really defining for myself what does it mean to be powerful in these specific roles and how much capacity do I have to show up.

In that space?

In that space?

Asking for help? You know, changing and modifying my life to really fit my priorities has done a lot. And then also just making sure my kids know, like I'm tired. So my daughter is eight, she was devastated when I left yesterday. She was like, please don't leave me. Literally she's like, can you please come home? And I'm like, I just need this one week to get this book in as many hands as possible and their mommy will be home. But I'm packing to her, now you do this, well, I'm doing this, so she understands this. Sometimes absence does not mean that I don't care, yea. And it's a balancing walk, especially I think if you have mom guilt like I do sometimes. But I also want her to see a woman walking in her purpose and being excited about it and changing lives. So I share testimonies with her too. I'm like, let's sit down and read these comments from this weekend. Thank you for being a.

Asking for help? You know, changing and modifying my life to really fit my priorities has done a lot. And then also just making sure my kids know, like I'm tired. So my daughter is eight, she was devastated when I left yesterday. She was like, please don't leave me. Literally she's like, can you please come home? And I'm like, I just need this one week to get this book in as many hands as possible and their mommy will be home. But I'm packing to her, now you do this, well, I'm doing this, so she understands this. Sometimes absence does not mean that I don't care, yea. And it's a balancing walk, especially I think if you have mom guilt like I do sometimes. But I also want her to see a woman walking in her purpose and being excited about it and changing lives. So I share testimonies with her too. I'm like, let's sit down and read these comments from this weekend. Thank you for being a.

Part of this. So she feels a part of it as well.

Part of this. So she feels a part of it as well.

Okay, because mama's son is twelve now, but I miss like a lot of him, like a lot of him being going from grade to grade, you know, because my mom, Between my mom and his dad, that's who has I was touring a lot before I actually got to do this, and I just feel so guilty a lot sometimes, Like and now I have this new baby and I'm like, I'm bringing him up to Jersey with me, and he wants to grow up in the house with the baby instead of me being in Jersey with the new baby with you know, and then him still being with my mother, like and I don't want to repeat.

Okay, because mama's son is twelve now, but I miss like a lot of him, like a lot of him being going from grade to grade, you know, because my mom, Between my mom and his dad, that's who has I was touring a lot before I actually got to do this, and I just feel so guilty a lot sometimes, Like and now I have this new baby and I'm like, I'm bringing him up to Jersey with me, and he wants to grow up in the house with the baby instead of me being in Jersey with the new baby with you know, and then him still being with my mother, like and I don't want to repeat.

That, right, I don't want to do that again. So I feel good.

That, right, I don't want to do that again. So I feel good.

So I had my son at fourteen, and I think one of the things that makes me feel most guilty is that I know that I was growing up while he was growing up, and so the way that I'm able to be present even for my younger kids, I know that he didn't have that.

So I had my son at fourteen, and I think one of the things that makes me feel most guilty is that I know that I was growing up while he was growing up, and so the way that I'm able to be present even for my younger kids, I know that he didn't have that.

So I think, one, I don't know if.

So I think, one, I don't know if.

You have to deal with this, but I had to really forgive myself for what I didn't know when I was raising him.

You have to deal with this, but I had to really forgive myself for what I didn't know when I was raising him.

Yeah, you know, I just I didn't know.

Yeah, you know, I just I didn't know.

I did the best that I could and to trust that I still have opportunity. If you think about adult children who were wounded from relationships that didn't go well with their parents, there's still a little kid inside of them that once their parents to show up, that wants to experience healing in that space. And so it reminds me too that I'm never out of time, So I'm constantly still reparenting him, even at twenty one years old.

I did the best that I could and to trust that I still have opportunity. If you think about adult children who were wounded from relationships that didn't go well with their parents, there's still a little kid inside of them that once their parents to show up, that wants to experience healing in that space. And so it reminds me too that I'm never out of time, So I'm constantly still reparenting him, even at twenty one years old.

You know, in the clamp down chapter.

You know, in the clamp down chapter.

You start by saying, if you're one of those people who know better and instantly do better, I'm probably going to be the friend who you roll your eyes at constantly.

You start by saying, if you're one of those people who know better and instantly do better, I'm probably going to be the friend who you roll your eyes at constantly.

Why are you that friend?

Why are you that friend?

Because things need to marinate from me, Like I don't just activate things like you could tell me, like you need to be vegan and I will. I'm gonna let that marinate for a year or two before that actually activates, because I don't do things just because someone says that I should do them. It has to be real. I have to have a conviction about it. But I will marinate it so I can figure out, like how does this revelation actually fit within the context of my life. So in the back of the books, each book has like something to marinate on, something to activate, and something to pray on, because I know everyone moves into change differently.

Because things need to marinate from me, Like I don't just activate things like you could tell me, like you need to be vegan and I will. I'm gonna let that marinate for a year or two before that actually activates, because I don't do things just because someone says that I should do them. It has to be real. I have to have a conviction about it. But I will marinate it so I can figure out, like how does this revelation actually fit within the context of my life. So in the back of the books, each book has like something to marinate on, something to activate, and something to pray on, because I know everyone moves into change differently.

I love the marinating before activating, but I feel like that's probably how the majority of us moved. Is there ever a time we shouldn't marinate before activating?

I love the marinating before activating, but I feel like that's probably how the majority of us moved. Is there ever a time we shouldn't marinate before activating?

Like the spirit says, do it? We just go?

Like the spirit says, do it? We just go?

I mean to each his own. I think if you feel.

I mean to each his own. I think if you feel.

I'm not into telling folks what they should do, you know, what I mean, Like, I think if you feel like there's a now on it, you should do that.

I'm not into telling folks what they should do, you know, what I mean, Like, I think if you feel like there's a now on it, you should do that.

You should move in it now.

You should move in it now.

And a lot of times when we move in it now, we learn the marination lessons afterwards, you know.

And a lot of times when we move in it now, we learn the marination lessons afterwards, you know.

But yeah, what about the spirit though, sound like just said move like the spirit always tells you to be patient and marinate.

But yeah, what about the spirit though, sound like just said move like the spirit always tells you to be patient and marinate.

I mean, I'm in relationship at on that I didn't have a choice. I didn't have a choice. I didn't have a toy that oh Lord, But yeah, no, no, I had I was in the spirit and that I had a mission to accomplish and I didn't want anything to distract me. And my husband wasn't there and my parents weren't there. So it wasn't like I was gonna be able toss the microphone. I was the you know, senior leadership person that was present in that room, and.

I mean, I'm in relationship at on that I didn't have a choice. I didn't have a choice. I didn't have a toy that oh Lord, But yeah, no, no, I had I was in the spirit and that I had a mission to accomplish and I didn't want anything to distract me. And my husband wasn't there and my parents weren't there. So it wasn't like I was gonna be able toss the microphone. I was the you know, senior leadership person that was present in that room, and.

So I had to take it off.

So I had to take it off.

I didn't love it, I didn't enjoy it, but I stood up to it, and uh, I think it was really interesting because I was going through something at that time where I was wondering could I be in Dallas a part of senior leadership, like with my past, with the way that I preached with the way that I'm a little different than I guess traditional pastors, and I really did feel like God was trying to tell me, like, just be authentic, just trust yourself in that season of my life. And so that Sunday, when I'm sitting there with a wig cap on and then other women started taking their wigs off on the altar, I was like, you know what, I think this maybe God trying to tell me You're gonna have to show up as your full self in order to get this done. And I know a lot of people made fun of it, but there were so many people who were like, seeing you stand there being courageous stepping into that moment helped me so much to just embrace who I am. And so I really feel like God took something that would have been very embarrassing and at least allowed there to be a buffer from the people who were moved by that moment.

I didn't love it, I didn't enjoy it, but I stood up to it, and uh, I think it was really interesting because I was going through something at that time where I was wondering could I be in Dallas a part of senior leadership, like with my past, with the way that I preached with the way that I'm a little different than I guess traditional pastors, and I really did feel like God was trying to tell me, like, just be authentic, just trust yourself in that season of my life. And so that Sunday, when I'm sitting there with a wig cap on and then other women started taking their wigs off on the altar, I was like, you know what, I think this maybe God trying to tell me You're gonna have to show up as your full self in order to get this done. And I know a lot of people made fun of it, but there were so many people who were like, seeing you stand there being courageous stepping into that moment helped me so much to just embrace who I am. And so I really feel like God took something that would have been very embarrassing and at least allowed there to be a buffer from the people who were moved by that moment.

For me, I was like, that's why we rock with her. You're always wanted to be your true self at all times.

For me, I was like, that's why we rock with her. You're always wanted to be your true self at all times.

Well, I mean, like, y'all know, this isn't my hair, and like, no, it's not ideal, but it's not more important than what I'm here for so like, I'm want to take it off and we're going to move on down the road. When I got back behind the platform that I was like, oh lord, I have desecrated the.

Well, I mean, like, y'all know, this isn't my hair, and like, no, it's not ideal, but it's not more important than what I'm here for so like, I'm want to take it off and we're going to move on down the road. When I got back behind the platform that I was like, oh lord, I have desecrated the.

Bottom, so.

Bottom, so.

There are bundles on the altar.

There are bundles on the altar.

I have just created this place. But yeah, it just turns out it wasn't that way.

I have just created this place. But yeah, it just turns out it wasn't that way.

I love out chapter sixteen to Know Your Harm? Oh yeah, what is knowing your heart?

I love out chapter sixteen to Know Your Harm? Oh yeah, what is knowing your heart?

Uh? Well, I talk about the oath that doctors take where they say, you know that they'll do no harm, but they're also recognizing that they're practicing.

Uh? Well, I talk about the oath that doctors take where they say, you know that they'll do no harm, but they're also recognizing that they're practicing.

And when we move in power.

And when we move in power.

Part of the reason why so many of us don't move in power is that we're afraid that we won't do it perfectly or that will make mistakes. But if we can embrace the reality that I'm going to be powerful and humble, I'm going to be wrong, I'm going to have to apologize. I'm going to mess up. I may say things too sharply. Then that doesn't make me any less powerful. As a matter of fact, it makes me more powerful because I recognize that my position of power could disrupt my relationships sometimes, but I value these relationships enough to learn how to be powerful in a way that honors the spaces that I'm in.

Part of the reason why so many of us don't move in power is that we're afraid that we won't do it perfectly or that will make mistakes. But if we can embrace the reality that I'm going to be powerful and humble, I'm going to be wrong, I'm going to have to apologize. I'm going to mess up. I may say things too sharply. Then that doesn't make me any less powerful. As a matter of fact, it makes me more powerful because I recognize that my position of power could disrupt my relationships sometimes, but I value these relationships enough to learn how to be powerful in a way that honors the spaces that I'm in.

Next time, what's your thought on the way that church is now? Right, as a kid, you had to go to church every Sunday. You had to be in the building, you had to sit there, and if there was a baptism, you was gonna be there all day. Now a lot of people turn it on Sunday morning and it's a lot easiest. What are your thoughts on people not actually attending the institution of church.

Next time, what's your thought on the way that church is now? Right, as a kid, you had to go to church every Sunday. You had to be in the building, you had to sit there, and if there was a baptism, you was gonna be there all day. Now a lot of people turn it on Sunday morning and it's a lot easiest. What are your thoughts on people not actually attending the institution of church.

First of all, you're not about to tie tripping me. No, you don't, No, you don't. Just be very clear. Let me see.

First of all, you're not about to tie tripping me. No, you don't, No, you don't. Just be very clear. Let me see.

I mean, I think that the world is changing, and as the world changes, I think people are finding things that are more convenient for them. And I do think that you are able to have intimate encounters with God from this comfort of your own home. And I think it's powerful that that's the way that things are being spread. I think it's like watching a football game at home, Like you can get hype, you can be excited for your team, but there is something about being in the room with other people that makes you just take things over the edge. I was surprised that in a world where people are uncoming to church that we have forty thousand women at the woman Evolve conference, because I'm like, I don't know that this is a thing that people are going to really be into when they like virtual experiences, but there is something that happens in healthy community and connection that allows your faith to really be strengthened. I've had people come into rooms and like they didn't really want to be there, somebody drug them in there. They were going through a depression, they don't even know why they were there, but just being in the space, sitting next to someone who was able to care for them and just being surrounded by worship lifted their spirits when they couldn't lift their own hands. And I don't think that there's any substitute for that.

I mean, I think that the world is changing, and as the world changes, I think people are finding things that are more convenient for them. And I do think that you are able to have intimate encounters with God from this comfort of your own home. And I think it's powerful that that's the way that things are being spread. I think it's like watching a football game at home, Like you can get hype, you can be excited for your team, but there is something about being in the room with other people that makes you just take things over the edge. I was surprised that in a world where people are uncoming to church that we have forty thousand women at the woman Evolve conference, because I'm like, I don't know that this is a thing that people are going to really be into when they like virtual experiences, but there is something that happens in healthy community and connection that allows your faith to really be strengthened. I've had people come into rooms and like they didn't really want to be there, somebody drug them in there. They were going through a depression, they don't even know why they were there, but just being in the space, sitting next to someone who was able to care for them and just being surrounded by worship lifted their spirits when they couldn't lift their own hands. And I don't think that there's any substitute for that.

Would you also keep it tight though one hour's.

Would you also keep it tight though one hour's.

Let us do something I don't. Yeah, it's it's finished. He said it.

Let us do something I don't. Yeah, it's it's finished. He said it.

Everything everything he said has been said to me, and so now we can go home and have brunch.

Everything everything he said has been said to me, and so now we can go home and have brunch.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I do think we have to honor people's time because people do have options, and so being really intentional about making sure people feel like I can go get out and have the rest of my day is part of what we should really lean into.

I do think we have to honor people's time because people do have options, and so being really intentional about making sure people feel like I can go get out and have the rest of my day is part of what we should really lean into.

Is the church whack?

Is the church whack?

That's a question, that's one of the question. That's what I got smoked for. He said that he thinks the church has become whack.

That's a question, that's one of the question. That's what I got smoked for. He said that he thinks the church has become whack.

I think it's a system now on God.

I think it's a system now on God.

It's a system.

It's a system.

Everything is a system, and systems work with or without God. So I think the institution of church is whack. I think how church is ran is whack. I think the religious system and structure is whack. I don't subscribe to it. Even though I grew up in it, I benefited from it, but I learned that God is not the church.

Everything is a system, and systems work with or without God. So I think the institution of church is whack. I think how church is ran is whack. I think the religious system and structure is whack. I don't subscribe to it. Even though I grew up in it, I benefited from it, but I learned that God is not the church.

I heard in context what he said made a lot more sense, but I heard the sound bite was trash. I think that everyone has a different experience of church, and I think that there are some people who have probably had an experience that has disheartened them in that way. But I love the church. I mean, as much as I went through my own church hurt and trauma, the church was also really beautiful to me in times where I didn't have anywhere to go and I could sit in that presence and experience God. And sometimes to really experience God in church, you have to look past the people and maybe that's whack. Maybe it's not, because maybe it keeps our focus on what you really matter.

I heard in context what he said made a lot more sense, but I heard the sound bite was trash. I think that everyone has a different experience of church, and I think that there are some people who have probably had an experience that has disheartened them in that way. But I love the church. I mean, as much as I went through my own church hurt and trauma, the church was also really beautiful to me in times where I didn't have anywhere to go and I could sit in that presence and experience God. And sometimes to really experience God in church, you have to look past the people and maybe that's whack. Maybe it's not, because maybe it keeps our focus on what you really matter.

I love what you said too about know your harm. You said, deflecting from the way that you harm someone and highlighting the way that they harm instead is a sign of immaturity that keeps you from truly being helpful.

I love what you said too about know your harm. You said, deflecting from the way that you harm someone and highlighting the way that they harm instead is a sign of immaturity that keeps you from truly being helpful.

Found on that well.

Found on that well.

A lot of times we will not embrace what we did to someone because of what they've done to us, and it keeps us from owning our stuff and growing and so being able to say, even though my teacher may not be perfect, like my teacher may have failed in chemistry, but they getting an A plus in this history class, that means that I need to at least be able to receive from them this opportunity to grow. And I feel like in relationships that's hard, especially if you're married, because when you're married, your person brings up something and you like, oh, but last week you did X, Y and Z, But what did you do today?

A lot of times we will not embrace what we did to someone because of what they've done to us, and it keeps us from owning our stuff and growing and so being able to say, even though my teacher may not be perfect, like my teacher may have failed in chemistry, but they getting an A plus in this history class, that means that I need to at least be able to receive from them this opportunity to grow. And I feel like in relationships that's hard, especially if you're married, because when you're married, your person brings up something and you like, oh, but last week you did X, Y and Z, But what did you do today?

You know?

You know?

And how can you own that?

And how can you own that?

And I think when we own our stuff, we give other people permission to do it as well. Sometimes we want to be the person who receives the apology, but not the one who gives it, but we have the lead in humility and vulnerability.

And I think when we own our stuff, we give other people permission to do it as well. Sometimes we want to be the person who receives the apology, but not the one who gives it, but we have the lead in humility and vulnerability.

You said, that's how you into a rate word initially.

You said, that's how you into a rate word initially.

Right where you oh, no, yeah.

Right where you oh, no, yeah.

No, everything, Yes, his stuff at him all the time.

No, everything, Yes, his stuff at him all the time.

Well, I don't know if I was throwing his stuff at him as much as I was maybe reciting it in my own head. But I think I will say that when I was single, after I went through my divorce, I finally got my life together with me and my two kids. You really could not tell me that I was not misindependent out here. So I really went into our relationship with a certain level of pride where I was like, at the end of the day, I got my stuff together. I finally love who I am and embracing it. And so when I was in relationship with him, and he would just ask me the simplest of questions. We weren't even fighting. It would just be like, why why'd you do that? I didn't like that because I'm not used to having nobody questioned my decision and it was a simple, harmless question. And so I think that I went into a defensive one because I wanted to protect my healing. And when you're in a marriage and you go into it trying to protect yourself and make sure that that you don't get done the way that you were done in the past. I don't know that it's fair for creating intimacy, and so I had to do a lot of work of receiving his perspective and finding it valuable so that I could become better, and I have become better as a result of it.

Well, I don't know if I was throwing his stuff at him as much as I was maybe reciting it in my own head. But I think I will say that when I was single, after I went through my divorce, I finally got my life together with me and my two kids. You really could not tell me that I was not misindependent out here. So I really went into our relationship with a certain level of pride where I was like, at the end of the day, I got my stuff together. I finally love who I am and embracing it. And so when I was in relationship with him, and he would just ask me the simplest of questions. We weren't even fighting. It would just be like, why why'd you do that? I didn't like that because I'm not used to having nobody questioned my decision and it was a simple, harmless question. And so I think that I went into a defensive one because I wanted to protect my healing. And when you're in a marriage and you go into it trying to protect yourself and make sure that that you don't get done the way that you were done in the past. I don't know that it's fair for creating intimacy, and so I had to do a lot of work of receiving his perspective and finding it valuable so that I could become better, and I have become better as a result of it.

What does power look like in a relationship?

What does power look like in a relationship?

Those dynamics are always changing. I think, especially now that we see hyper masculinity is beginning to be interrogated. We're seeing women move into positions where sometimes they're the breadwinners and men are at home being more comfortable taking care of the family. I think power in a relationship is recognizing the strengths of what your person carries and how that strength builds you in your area of weakness, without feeling like they have to be strong or stronger in the same area that you're strong. I think it's like this symbiotic relationship, this flow where you're able to build a life together because both of you bring something different to the table, and to honor that, to really honor it is important.

Those dynamics are always changing. I think, especially now that we see hyper masculinity is beginning to be interrogated. We're seeing women move into positions where sometimes they're the breadwinners and men are at home being more comfortable taking care of the family. I think power in a relationship is recognizing the strengths of what your person carries and how that strength builds you in your area of weakness, without feeling like they have to be strong or stronger in the same area that you're strong. I think it's like this symbiotic relationship, this flow where you're able to build a life together because both of you bring something different to the table, and to honor that, to really honor it is important.

You said something else in the book.

You said something else in the book.

You said when you are unable to connect the dots between who you since you could become and who you presently are, it doesn't just cause internal frustration.

You said when you are unable to connect the dots between who you since you could become and who you presently are, it doesn't just cause internal frustration.

It renders you powerless.

It renders you powerless.

And one of the examples you use is you don't defend yourself when misunderstood. Yeah, and to me, not feeling to need to explain yourself is power.

And one of the examples you use is you don't defend yourself when misunderstood. Yeah, and to me, not feeling to need to explain yourself is power.

Well, I think not explaining yourself and not defending yourself, and I think it's different because you have a platform and so you can't defend yourself twenty four to seven. But when we're in intimate relationships with someone and they have an expectation.

Well, I think not explaining yourself and not defending yourself, and I think it's different because you have a platform and so you can't defend yourself twenty four to seven. But when we're in intimate relationships with someone and they have an expectation.

Of who we are or this idea of who.

Of who we are or this idea of who.

We are, and we don't change that, we allow them to believe it, we do end up powerless because I'm not even bringing the full version of who I am into this friendship, into this parent child dynamic, and you end up robbing yourself of the ability to really show up in your power and allow them to believe something about you that's not true. And so it is powerful to be like, you got me messed up, Like that's not what I believe you, that's not what I think. And if we're going to walk this thing I want you to know who I am for real, so that you can know what to expect from me.

We are, and we don't change that, we allow them to believe it, we do end up powerless because I'm not even bringing the full version of who I am into this friendship, into this parent child dynamic, and you end up robbing yourself of the ability to really show up in your power and allow them to believe something about you that's not true. And so it is powerful to be like, you got me messed up, Like that's not what I believe you, that's not what I think. And if we're going to walk this thing I want you to know who I am for real, so that you can know what to expect from me.

Okay, guys about intimate relationship.

Okay, guys about intimate relationship.

Yeah, yeah, it's hard.

Yeah, yeah, it's hard.

It's hard for me.

It's hard for me.

You know, she has to go. I know she has TV or something, but I know she has to go.

You know, she has to go. I know she has TV or something, but I know she has to go.

So damn.

So damn.

He's doing is telling them the book. They're not gonna buy.

He's doing is telling them the book. They're not gonna buy.

If you ask all the questions about the book, making her basically recite the.

If you ask all the questions about the book, making her basically recite the.

Book, you should pray to your bob looks like hers, That's what you should.

Book, you should pray to your bob looks like hers, That's what you should.

Why my bob.

Why my bob.

He can get here? Why like when she put a wig off? Because I.

He can get here? Why like when she put a wig off? Because I.

Would addressing keep answer.

Would addressing keep answer.

Questions to him.

Questions to him.

So you forced me to see.

So you forced me to see.

Well, what message you hope peop get from the bo Oh?

Well, what message you hope peop get from the bo Oh?

The message that I am hoping people get from the book is that power is a flow, and that power that you have experienced in your past is still present in your future. It just must it just might be taking on a different form. So to be open to how power is being redefined in your present. Prayer, Thank you God for this opportunity, for this platform. Thank you for using these voices at this stage in their life. And I'd usually pray for the listeners. But God, I'm going to pray for them that you would stir up the gift of God that's on the inside of them, that you would highlight the areas of their life where you want them to experience more of your power and to show them the power that you've placed inside of them. I thank you God for giving them wisdom strategy not just for their careers, but for their family, their emotional health and wellness. And God, I pray that you would continue to show them your life that they may into it in Jesus' name.

The message that I am hoping people get from the book is that power is a flow, and that power that you have experienced in your past is still present in your future. It just must it just might be taking on a different form. So to be open to how power is being redefined in your present. Prayer, Thank you God for this opportunity, for this platform. Thank you for using these voices at this stage in their life. And I'd usually pray for the listeners. But God, I'm going to pray for them that you would stir up the gift of God that's on the inside of them, that you would highlight the areas of their life where you want them to experience more of your power and to show them the power that you've placed inside of them. I thank you God for giving them wisdom strategy not just for their careers, but for their family, their emotional health and wellness. And God, I pray that you would continue to show them your life that they may into it in Jesus' name.

That's right.

That's right.

Make sure you go get Sarah Jke roberts new book Power Moves Ignite your Confidence to become a Force, and subscribe to her podcast, The Woman of All Podcasts on the Black effect Ieheart Radio podcast Network.

Make sure you go get Sarah Jke roberts new book Power Moves Ignite your Confidence to become a Force, and subscribe to her podcast, The Woman of All Podcasts on the Black effect Ieheart Radio podcast Network.

That's right.

That's right.

We appreciate you for coming, Miss Roberts, and you need to come more often for people who think church is whack because you're the person I feel like is going to bridge the gap between you know, church in this new generation.

We appreciate you for coming, Miss Roberts, and you need to come more often for people who think church is whack because you're the person I feel like is going to bridge the gap between you know, church in this new generation.

I really feel that way, So thank you.

I really feel that way, So thank you.

That's That's a tremendous honor a lot of responsibility. But I'm committed to, you know, holding down my Square.

That's That's a tremendous honor a lot of responsibility. But I'm committed to, you know, holding down my Square.

That's right, all right, Sarah Jakes Roberts.

That's right, all right, Sarah Jakes Roberts.

It's the Breakfast Club.

It's the Breakfast Club.

Good morning, wake that.

Good morning, wake that.

Ass up in the morning. The Breakfast Club

Ass up in the morning. The Breakfast Club