On today’s episode, Dave and Liz discuss some New Year’s resolutions that couples can make to intentionally strengthen their relationships. Whether you want to create more fun and adventure in your marriage or slow down and have more alone time with your partner, listen in for some life-changing tips and tools you can use to improve your marriage in 2023.

Time Stamps:

0:00 – Introduction: Dave & Liz
2:12 – Common New Year's resolutions
4:27 – Improving relationships in the new year
6:41 – Relationship regrets; looking back and moving forward
8:45 – Commitment; removing the threat of divorce
10:57 – Bringing fun and adventure into the ordinary
12:37 – The law of least effort and the law of little things
14:33 – When schedules are off
16:05 – Exercising together as a couple
18:32 – Celebrating small wins and sharing the good news
20:44 – Saying yes more often
22:22 – Small acts of kindness
24:34 – Terms of endearment
26:02 – Conflict management, soft start up, aiming to understand
28:39 – How mantras can change the situation
30:21 – The power of pausing; respond instead of react
32:00 – Using a system to manage finances
34:48 – Having no secrets in your relationship
36:04 – Everyday, every moment is a chance to have a do over
36:20 – Intentionality; expressions of gratitude, compassion, and kindness are the lifeblood of relationships.

Insights:

Dave: The big picture for me is that people are more important than problems.

Liz: Regrets are not the end of the world. We don't want to have no regrets, because regrets teach us what we value the most.

Invites:

   ●    Liz encourages couples to try to put their arguments to rest or at least come to a truce within an hour and certainly within the day. Do not let things go on past the day - the faster the better.

   ●    Be less reactive and more responsive. Part of that is watching your temper, your tongue, and your tone. Dave encourages that it’s okay to feel intense feelings but don’t follow them as far as to react to them.

   ●    Aim to understand. Even if you don’t agree, try to see the situation from your partner's perspective, creating more compassion. In your mind, try to come up with three reasons why they might be right.

   ●    Even if you disagree with someone, you don't have to confront them. You don't have to bring it up. Relationships can significantly improve if one or both partners would leave some things left unsaid.

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Dr. Dave Schramm:
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Dr. Liz Hale:
http://www.drlizhale.com/