Dear Steve and Shirley, I've been in a relationship with my fiancé for three years. In the beginning everything was great but things have taken a turn for the worse. She has hit me on two different occasions and it startled me because I have never raised my hand to her even been mad enough to hit her. Lately she has been pointing out my flaws and to add insult to injury. Sex is like a foreign concept to her. She has no desire to have sex with me now no matter how many different ways I try........
Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
Buckle up, hold on type we got it for you. It is the Strawberry letter. Subject is it taught for me to move on? Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been in a relationship with my fiance for three years. In the beginning, everything was great, but things have taken a turn for the worse. She has hit me on two different occasions, and it started. It startled me because I have never raised my hand to her or even been mad enough to hit her. Lately, she has been pointing out my flaws and to add insult to injury. Sex is like a foreign concept to her. She has no desire to have sex with me now, no matter how many different ways I try. I have women that flirt with me daily, but when I'm around my fiance is like I don't exist. We have been living together for the past two years and she doesn't work, so I am responsible for all of the bills. I bought her a new car, and I do the very best I can to take care of her. And she won't even cook breakfast or dinner anymore. She won't hold my hand in public, so hugging or kissing her on the cheek is out of the question. When we're at home together. She is constantly on her phone, scrolling on social media, watching videos and looking at pictures. I'm only thirty four years old, but I feel like my happiness is passing me by. I would hate to leave her since we are planning a wedding, but I cannot spend the rest of my life like this. Is there anything I can do to get this relationship back on track? This is supposed to be my forever love. Please help? Okay, first, stop the wedding plans right now. Just stop making plans because you guys aren't ready. I mean this, this is a relationship that's going nowhere right now. How things are right now is how things will be, and uh, they could get worse. And unless you guys get some help some problems, I don't know. This relationship looks hopeless to me. I mean, think about it. If she's hitting you now before you get married, what do you think is going to make her stop after the marriage. I mean, I don't condone violence, uh when men hit women, and I certainly don't condone violence when women hit men. That needs to stop. If she's not, um, you know, giving you sex right now and she has no desire to have sex with you right now? What makes you think that's going to change. You're thirty four years old and and you're definitely right. You're not happy, and um, your your happiness is passing you by. She's on social media constantly. She's not into the relationship at all. She doesn't even cook with you, for for you anymore. It sounds to me like she's checked out of the relationship. So how do you get it back on track? I don't know, because she's already gone. It seems, um, you're responsible for all the bills she doesn't work. Uh. You sound like a good man, a decent man, USh, and you certainly deserve better. Uh. This relationship looks very, very hopeless to me to get it back on track. I mean there are things you could do, of course, like get some counseling for for one, But I just don't see this relationship going anywhere. You Steve, what do you think? Hell no, I don't even know what is what is this letter? Faulks? First of all, let me just get with the fact that he howled. That's it. What you ain't got no kids, you ain't married, boy, Run get out, get way from this health This is not what you want. This letter right here is nothing good in the letter. This letter go to hell as soon as he started talking. Yes, you've been with your fiance three years. In the beginning, everything was great, ain't it always always in the beginning? What in the beginning ain't been right? That's how I began. That's why I began, because it was wonderful. But things have taken a turn for the worst. She has hit me on two different occasions, and it started and it startled me because I've never even raised my hand to her and been mad enough to hit her. Okay, let's go over this line again. She hit me on two different cases and it startled me. Let's just go on, say what this is? And she'd have slapped your ass so hard he scared you? Startled? Is a is a letter? Writing turns? She slapped you so hard she scared yours? Is it a startled sound? It was like this happen And the second time she slapped you, you you double up. You know where the hell was going, so you didn't start them. She scared you. Let me just say this and I'm not gonna believe at this point right here, you in for a series of more ask work just want you to know that they just started. You've justn't done it twice. She's gonna file fhen you get all right, now, let's move on. Okay, Lately she's been pointing out my flaws and to add insult to injury. Sex is like a foreign concept to her. She has no design to have sex with me now, no matter how many different ways I tried. Okay, right there, we out, Wow, are you your thirty four? When I was thirty four, I had to have sex all the time, even when I ain't on it. I felt a strong obligation to have it. If you asked me, I just said yes. I didn't have to like you. You ain't really got to be my type. You ain't really even got to be all that damn a tractor I was sting for. I had to unload this somewhere because the backup was in forty eight hours. In forty eight hours, I had accumulated enough backup where we're starting to make my eyes hurt. Did women ask back in the day like that? You did? Okay, Like if I walked past and you looked at me, I assume you must, so I turned around and ask you want you know you're looking over here. I'm in this mall. I'm broke, I ain't got no house. But you won't sleep together. Always think that because I'm holding I want to sleep with you because you probably got a bed somewhere, and that means I ain't got to stay in this car to now Do I love you? Hell? Yeah? Right now? Are you fine? To me? Just what I've been looking for? So now, no sex? This is over, man, Okay, hold it right there. Let's take a break and when we come back talk about that one. Whatever. All right? The subject is is it time for me to move on? That is the subject of my letter today. Let's recap this letter subject is it time for me to move on? It's thirty for you. Don't dude in a relationship? He lived with this one for two years. They feelance, say she don't have sex with him no more. She dogs him, points out all his flaws, don't hold his hand and they do not, and she hits him, then hit him twice. These is hits right now. They're going to develop. They're going to grow, just like feelings grow. So do I ask what they do? They do? Mine grew as a child. My father made him a little bit more severe and more severe until I got it. See everything grows, I have whom it's gonna grow. These ain't gonna be hits in a minute. Now she didn't beat you, and now she ain't having no sex. And you're thirty four. And like I said when out thirty four, I had helsick even when I didn't want and a lot of times I'm gonna be just even more honest with you. I didn't make the decisions. What made the decisions. My privates made the decision. It decided for me. You've often heard your mama said, why don't you think with the head on top of your neck when you're gonna use your big gass head to think, you ain't got wrong for a brain in it? Okay, we get it. Okay, So anyway, he's not having sex. This is over which he don't have no design to text sex. But we've been living together for the past two years. Talk about what she's not working right here? She does not work, So I'm responsible for all the bills. Well you know I ain't. I understand that, but you know, if you know, man, look you you're finding something wrong right now. If she was look a woman don't really have to work to validate herself. Homemakers are incredibly efficient and very much needed. So I can't knock that part. But you're mad at her cause she ain't working out, cause she ain't giving you no cooking. Because you are here, you're working for cooking. She lets you keep. Let's throw this out here too. The reason we all go to work as men, the reason we buy, we bathe and shower, the reason we the reason we're gonna get it any form of education, the reason we are in our clothes, where deodorant, by watching shot our shoes. It's for cooking. Now you're not getting no cooking. But she at the house eating. Yeah, oh, and it ain't having sex. She's not cooking. I didn't take offense to that line that she doesn't cook or breakfast or dinner anymore. Well, you know, I don't give a damn it. She cookie, She don't won't even cook breakfasts of dinner no more. Why is you worried about the food. You're not having sex. Let's just get back to that. Hey, what you gotta eat for? You ain't working up no hunger, You ain't got the appetise. You ain't done that in weeks, I wouldn't even be hungry. Yeah, I bought her a new car, and I do the best I can to take care of her. And she won't even cook breakfasts on dinner. She won't hold my hand in public, so hugging or kissing her on the cheek is out of the question. When we home together, she's constantly on the phone, scrolling on social media, watching videos, and looking at pictures. I'm only thirty four, but I feel that my happiness is passing away, slipping right through your fingers, player, slipping right through your fingers. All your happiness is tied up into this dried up old stink, no working, evil, slapping you ass whooping woman. Okay, I want to make sure I got everything. Then he said I would hate to leave her. You got to kid out what you would hate to leave her? Oh, you like getting slapped, You like not having sex, You like buying cars and getting nothing in return. You like people that's on social media won't even let you kiss on the cheek, A whole her head. I would hate to leave Hell, you ought to hate to stay. Some woman would be happy to get this man. Oh man, they're gonna get hers since we are playing in the I would hate to leave her since we're playing in the wedding holding man? Who what? What? What are you marrying? You're feeling married? This? Are you crazy? Are you crazy? If you're not happy now? Madge does not make a person happy. Magic is a completion manage, ain't started nothing. It's to complete something. You don't marry, nobody start to get happy. You married somebody so you can finish being happy. Marriage is about completion, man, anybody start, you can start a family and all this here. But guess what that's that's life altering. M hmm. I can't but I cannot spend the rest of my night life like this. Well you better not marry huh? Please tell him stop? Is there anything I can do to get this relationship back on track? And white relationship? Boy? She's slapping you. You ain't having sex, She ain't working, she driving a car. You can't kiss him, you can't hug, You can't talk to it in public. She don't talk to you. You ain't have you ain't having sex. You're thirty four? What is you doing? Because you got to be backed up? Boy, you got to be right now. Your ear drums just hurt what happened. I had that happen. One time your ear drums started. I was six weeks one time in your ear, my ear started. Your ears ears have to do with it. It's that's pressure. It was like I was on a plane. The cabin pressure went down. My ears was. I hadn't had sex in six weeks. I was in my thirties. That can't have in your thirties. You don't know what to do. My eyes was getting big, teeth was starting to hurt. But you had an ear ache all the time. And I was homeless. I had too much going on. I looked over on the head rest one time I saw blood on My ears had started. That pressure was trying to come out somewhere. I was driving my car, man, just looking at anything, or billboard or panic bill bill anything. Everything was exciting to me. Set up here, man. I used to get out the car and walk through the mall, just walking and women to problem. You just walk pad brawls in town, just trying to find some type of relief. Alright, guys, we gotta get out of here. You can email us or instagram us your thoughts on Today's Strawberry letter at Steve Harvey f M. You're listening to Steve hayw