Sibling Revelry with Kate Hudson and Oliver HudsonLiving Up to the Legacy with Riley Keough
Growing up as the granddaughter of Elvis Presley, and the daughter of Lisa Marie came with blessings and burdens.
Riley Keough opens up to Kate and Oliver about her generational legacy and the tragedies that made her who she is today.
Plus, more on the private memories she shares in her new book "From Here to the Great Unknown."
Hi.
I am Kate Hudson and my name is Oliver Hudson. We wanted to do something that highlighted our.
Relationships and what it's like to be siblings. We are a sibling.
Reivalry.
No, no, sibling. You don't do that with your mouth.
Ravelry.
That's good. I'm really excited, Oliver, because we are interviewing my friend, Riley Kioff. And she is the sweetest, kindest, most loving, wonderful, talented, beautiful human and she has a lot now released her book from Here to the Great Unknown, and she finished sort of the book that her mom had started. And I'm just excited to talk to herself.
So that's cool.
Yeah, no, yeah, it's amazing. Yes.
Well, I don't think i've met her, even though she's sort of in the mix with you and you know, Jamie, I think styles her and I don't, but I don't think i've I don't think i've ever met her. She's really she's in for a real treat.
Well let's bring her on because Okay, I love her.
Hi.
Hi, Hi, I'm so happy to be here.
Yay, I'm so happy you're here. This is so fun.
I love your Christmasy background. Hi, Oliver, How are you?
How are you good? How you doing?
I'm doing well.
Allie was just saying that he doesn't think that you guys have met, and I was, are you sure?
I don't think so.
No, yeah, I don't think so. He's just been in the mix in and around Jamie and Kate and posts and outfits and garments and this and this. Yeah, that's that's how I know you.
You meet you on the podcast.
Well let's get into it because you you know, you've had your book out, which, by the way, how has that been for you?
It's been interesting. I Uh, it's very intense, so I it's not like it's normally when you're doing press, you're talking about a thing you worked on or a you know, uh, something that's removed from yourself a lot of the time, and you kind of try and avoid the personal stuff. But with this, it's like only very personal. So it's kind of goes against a lot of my instincts to like keep those things to myself. So it's been very bizarre. But ultimately what's been really wonderful is a lot of the feedback has been really like, uh, very human and like the human like people read it and have real connection to the experience, And I think that that's been something that in my life I haven't experienced a lot because I think there's been such like a separateness with regards to my family that it doesn't feel very human. So I think when people write to me or come up to me at the you know, book talks and stuff, and they have these really relatable experiences, like, that's been really wonderful.
Yeah, do you find that, like also maybe opening up a part of your life has made it not so scary anymore?
Oh, for sure. Like I really think that for me, there's always Catharsis in honesty and like live and being open in general. So I find personally the more that I carry things alone or don't share them with even friends, they're troublesome to me. So I in my life like to always, you know, share what I'm going through or what my experience is. So I do think that taking something out of secrecy and sort of into the light is healing.
Is that something that you will you said you weren't even able to do with friends at some point, meaning you know you keep things inside generally or are you a very open person?
I'm pretty open, but I think that there are times when I've gone through experiences where I just think, you know, I'll get through this by myself, and then it gets to a point where it kind of bubbles up and I share it, and then I'm like, oh, I feel so much better that I've shared this experience with a friend who's had a similar experience. And I think that sort of human connection is really important.
I want to add to this. I mean, I know that for me, and maybe maybe this will feel relatable, maybe not, but I know that there's a part of me that when I entered like a more public you know, when I became a more sort of public name, felt very protective of my family's way of how they want to live and protecting the thing and their privacy, and so you kind of like can't share or feel like sometimes you don't can't really share this huge part of your life that even if you wanted to express it and protecting everyone else, you sort of keep it in. And and I think that that that sometimes when you start to kind of open it up. I think for Olliver and I that happened on this podcast a little bit. It's like we sort of started to be like, you know, it's so this is this actually is our life? Yeah, my own life, Like we kind of have to talk about things and open it up that once you do, you're like, oh, that feels so much better.
Why was I so weird about this?
Why was I so weird? And it's really because you feel like you're I think like protecting your your your mom, or you're or you know, your grand you know, it's like Rider. I think about Rider, Like what's going to happen when Ryder does a movie and goes on his first talk show between like how does he talk about his great parents or his parents? Like you become sort of a politician about it.
Yeah, but what you're doing with a book that is expressive and sort of telling your truth is you're able to control the narrative, you know you. And then that book goes out there with with what I found, with what Katie and I do on this podcast, where yes, there has been a freedom, you know, sort of an openness. All of a sudden, it's all clickbait and it's picked up like Olarah Hudson fucking hates.
It's so silly. That stuff so silly, And I do feel lucky that it doesn't really affect me, like I I understand the need to like create clickbait and and it's so silly because you open up the article and it's like totally out of context and yeah.
And we're all victims. Like I'll click on things like you know, shark like tears off somewhere. Oh what is that?
Click on?
But then you click on it's just such a disappointment. It's like a blow up toyo cool shark. It sort of scraped some kids like finger. You know, this is what I wanted to try to get.
Riley, what was your childhood? Like, I mean, I know it's like a really big question, but you know, how do you feel like you had a seemingly normal childhood or do you feel like you grew up in an extraordinarily not normal well child.
I'm able to see that I grew up in an extraordinarily not normal situation, but it felt normal because it was the only life that I knew. But you know, when you talk about when we talk about like secrecy and stuff, like when I was growing up, it was so like everything was very locked down. There was no sharing any information. Like I never was able to tell anyone where I lived or what I where I was or you know, like it was very uh private, like constantly seeing my everyone lying around me. You know, like if we'd walk into a store and with my mom, they'd be like, where are you from? She'd like make up a store, you know, just like constant Like there was no there was no writing our information anywhere. So that was kind of and it was in the nineties, and it was so much different than it is now, Like people didn't really share their whole lives on Instagram and and so I grew up in that kind of era, which was like very private and like the idea of a reality show or sharing your you know, intimate details was very like embarrassing something.
You know.
Yeah, it's a different world now, but you know, it was a really unusual circumstance. And my mom was extremely famous, and what that meant kind of back then was very different to what it means now. And I know, hate you experienced, you know, generations of what that felt like. But it was like there wasn't so many famous people, so it was like there's much more attention on you, and it was just like intense, it was like, but it was all I you know, all I was used to so I didn't, you know, and at the time, like when I was young, it was probably when my mom was the most famous in her life, and and.
So it was just you know, like you did you do you remember at first of how old were you when she was like sort of the most famous, you know, only.
Birth until I was like when I was about seventeen.
At calm down, Okay, So did you feel did you feel like you a part of you just didn't like this, you know, I mean, was there a rebellious nature to it? Did you welcome it? You know? I mean speaking of clickbait, One of the things that I said a little while back was I didn't like when people came up to my mom when I was a kid. It made me crazy. I was like, leave me the fuck alone, right, And I expressed that story, and literally the headlines were Oliver like hated his mother's fans, like that was that was the headline. But you know, how did you how did you sort of take all of it in?
I don't That's an interesting question. But I don't think that I had a preference because I didn't. I didn't know that. I didn't think there was an option. But I kind of like just lived in it, like I uh, you know, it was everything was really you know, we leave the house, it's like ten security guards, and I go to school, they're Like. What I didn't like was a lot of the time I'd have security on everywhere with me, so like it made it really hard to have genuine experiences as a kid. Like they'd sit outside my school if I went to a friend's house, you know, if I slept over at a friend's house, they park outside the friend's house.
You know.
So I remember when I was like fourteen or fifteen, I wanted to go to the mall with my friends, and I begged my mom to please not have security for like just once, and it was embarrassing to me to have someone following me around. Yeah, And then I went and she said that was okay, and we were walking around the mall and then lo and behold like.
A security guard.
I was, I'm so upset, you know, like I was. I was so embarrassed and so upset. But my friends didn't know, but I knew, you know, and I was really mad. So I think there were a couple of times where I was really desperate to have like a normal experience and whatever with my friends, and it just wasn't possible for me. And what it did do is like my life right now is very simple, and so I definitely prefer like, for example, like I have a weird thing where I don't really want to hire a full time assistant because I want to do things myself, you know, like I grew up in an environment where everyone did everything all the time. Yeah, for you, and so I definitely prefer a smaller life as an adult.
Yeah. Isn't it interesting though, how you can go one way or the other.
Yeah, exactly.
It could have been like, oh, I need assistance, right, or it's like no, no, no, no, I don't want that. Here's here's what I need totally.
And I think that's true. Some people grow up in that situation and then it kind of just that's their expectation and they want that all the time. Or for me, it was more I did sort of desire to have a more normal life that you know, where I could walk into a coffee shop and I was really lucky to be able to have that. You know, my mom never had that option, no.
I know, I mean she's yeah, I mean she's.
Really imagine Taylor Swift, I mean, it's like it's great and she's doing incredible things, but like you that's it. You cannot have a normal life. There's God. That's a yeah.
And it also depends on what you want, you know, Like I I agree, you know, like I have a few friends. There's sometimes where I'll see people that are at a level of fame that for me, I would not enjoy because I grew up watching that And maybe I don't know, it's not like I love, like I really value being able to like walk around and go into a coffee shop and not be stuck in my house twenty four seven, like my mom. You know, we did go out, but it was a thing.
You know.
Do you think that you're managing your career with that in the back of your mind, because you can't. You can't control your fame unless you choose not to do things.
It's interesting you say that. I think I did for a long time avoid things that could potentially make my life very different, you know. And I as an actor, like I definitely was look I prefer small, like I prefer a certain type of film. But I also there was a part of me that was like, oh God, if I go that route, I could you know. Maybe I don't know if I would enjoy that so much.
I also think it's a personality thing. I have to say, Like I I like the reality is like it's like if you build it, it will come right, you know. It's like field of dreams. Like I have to be honest, like I've never had full time security, even even when I've had like weirdos or like you know, twenty five paparazzi following you. I think you invite in a certain type of vibe by the way.
I have to say I agreed with this to an extent because I have had someone recently said, like commented on how I travel like by myself, and I'm not like I'll show up places alone and I don't have like a big group of people that come with me anywhere. And someone said, you're very like low key, And I was like, well, if you travel that way, you get more on you.
You know, that's right, Like I'm similar to you, Like I'll walk down the street all by myself. I don't have that. I don't want I go. I travel by myself. I do you know, I don't bring a thousand people. And people always comment on and you're like because if.
I don't want to be weird man, Yeah.
Yeah, I am.
I want to put my hat on and walk down the street. And that's it, and that's what you invite. And I really think it's what you put out.
I'm opposite. I'm opposite. I have sy security, I have five people around me at all times.
You think about it though, like Elvis is your grandpa, Like, of course, it takes a little bit of an adjustment and maybe some generational shifts to get to realize that, you know, there is that there are other ways to also be in the arts and to not invite in that kind of hysteric are you know?
Well, our father actually with our connection is our dad cured. His first role ever, I think was kicking Elvis in the shins. Wasn't it really his first role? Yeah, he was nine years old, was a.
Scene with I think you told me this, I need to look up.
Yeah. Then he nominated for Golden Globe for playing.
Played Elvis and what like changed his career. And then mom stayed in your grandpa's place in Vegas when she was doing her variety show.
That's right, So you just told me this, that's say.
And he like called her a chicken and she that's so cute. It's really cute. And it was so cute because our daughters were like walking together and I was like, God, you know, sometimes you step outside of like the life that you just know, and you really can see like the imprint of what generationally in the arts and in that our family has had that sort of is really spectacular and so amazing. And then to like see the generations, the younger generation, like good, you know, what are you gonna do? What's going to be your co.
It's true and and you know, all for all the clickbait searchers out there, like, I feel very lucky to have grown up in my family and for the opportunities you know, that I've gotten. And it wasn't it wasn't like I was making some big effort to escape the family. There's no headline, you know. It was just like I just prefer being low key, and I think that you know, I I don't actually like attention on me, which is why this book tour has been kind of intense, and people keep asking, well, then why are you, you know, in this industry, and I'm like, because there's literally nothing else I could.
Do that's funny. No, I know, it's it's it's funny, kay. And I look at our kids and all the cousins are best best friends. We got super lucky there. But every single one of them wants to be in this business, right because they've seen their uncles, their aunts, their grand their grand you know, parents, and it's like it's as if they know nothing else, right, And and that's.
Sort of how it is. It's like if you're growing up in a household of doctors, you know. And I think for you know, I'm sure we've had a similar experience where you grow up with this is the industry your family are in, and that's kind of all you assume that you're going to do.
It's also an amazing industry with a million different things to do inside of that, exactly know what I mean. Like Wrider, for instance, he loves to make furniture, Like he's getting obsessed with making furniture and design, you know, And I'm like, you know, he's he's a wonderful actor and hopefully has great success, but like he also can like do stage design. You know, there's a million things he could do side of you know, the world of storytelling. It's like it's the only art form where you really truly take multiple, multiple different art forms to do one thing. You know, you think about like from fashion to make up, to production design to music to sound, like just.
Horticulture, like greenery. I mean, if you could take anything, I can get.
Back to like your childhood, you know, so you when did you kind of when was the when you started realizing not just your mom, but sort of like the family, the big nits, the sort of iconicness because I mean, let's be honest, like you couldn't come from a more iconic you know, Lenny. I mean if Elvis Presley being your grandpa, Priscilla you know, being your grandmother, I mean, this is like they're legends, and so like, when did that hit you?
I don't think. I'm sure it's the same experience you have with your kids where it just doesn't hit them. It's just like what they know, you know, and like they're never like they're like, you know, I'm.
Sure I don't know it is Elvis.
Right, But I think that Ronnie or all your children just used to all the things and people coming up to you, and that they either just used to it, you know, and it was the same thing. I just it was all I knew. So I there's no memory of ever clicking or something. It just was always there, you know.
Yeah, I get that because there wasn't that light bulb moment where it was always like that. So there was never that sort of punchwards like holy shit, No it.
Was I think it was holy It was the intensity of it was there from birth, you know, So it just was all I knew.
So now you start your own career and you decide to do the girlfriend experience where you basically are as raw and open and available and sexual and all of these things. Did you have Was there any part of you that thought, oh God, is this the right move? And I say that in the best way because it was so You're so amazing and it was just like so fucking great, great, But like you just had you were just felt it was amazing, Like you would never think knowing you that you would just be so free.
Yeah.
I think that, like my the performer part of me like is separate to the Elvis's granddaughter part of me, and that I just like don't think about them in the same with the same brain or something, you know, Like I feel like my choices as an actor and whatever director are very much like separate to the Elvis dynasty, you know, like and so I just kind of it's instinctual. It's like, you know, whatever is feeling like the right thing to do at the right time. Of course, there's things in my career that I'm not as proud of, but for the most part, it's all just what my sensibility is as an actor and an artist. I guess, but I guess I.
Like, I don't know.
I definitely do work that's more. You don't know what the word is, like, I don't know, not super safe, I guess.
Yeah, you like to take risks, but I think.
That's just fun for me. I like things that make me feel uncomfortable and like out of my comfort zone and like a challenge and make me think and but not you know, not just for risk's sake, just things that are inspiring to me.
Yeah, because I remember when my when I my my best girlfriend who I also produced with, was like, watch this show right now.
I think what was exciting about that was that it was it felt like a unique viewpoint on sex work that I hadn't seen before, and it felt like it was actually liberating to women in it, and now I think there's a lot more of that kind of content, But at that time, it felt very like I hadn't seen anything that portrayed sex work in this way that felt empowering.
You know, it's pretty amazing. I just think you're so many Maybe.
You should try doing sitcoms multi multi Riley. You just you just said you wanted to do something out of the box, dangerous, something that scares you. When you were saying that, I was like, I'll bet you a sitcom, but free. Yah.
I through through my journey in this industry, trying different things, like I kind of know my zone and I feel like I, you know, like I I have a handle on it, and I think that I don't know if I would I don't know if I would get hired for a sitcom.
You never know, you never know, you never know. Do you feel like that, you know? I think, I guess it's weird for me to ask these questions because I feel like I get asked these questions all the time, and sometimes they are just such annoying questions. But do you feel like you were treated differently than other people in the industry just based on your your family?
I think It's a good question to ask because you you can relate, you know what.
I mean, there's I'm really curious if you relate to this because you have a different last name. And I had actually a lot of experiences where people didn't know and I would go in an audition and like people had no idea, and I'm really lucky that I had that. And even like up until my mom passed away, there would be a lot of times where I would be on a movie set and people, you know, in the cast, like close people would be like, wait, you're Elvis's granddaughter. Like, so I there was a separation that occurred that I was a little bit undercover, like when I started auditioning regularly and just going in rooms, like I was just doing the whole cattle call thing, and I don't think people necessarily knew it.
Yeah, similar so like because I had a last name, like some people did because they.
Knew people family friends or something.
Yeah, but all in all, like because of my last name, there wasn't it wasn't the same. Yeah. Even when I did my first movie, I did this, like or one of my first movies, like I play this Irish girl, and like people in Ireland actually thought it was like a new upcoming Irish actress. I was like, yes, this is the best.
I was the opposite. I'd go into auditions on the sign and sheet and write Oliver Hudson Goldiehan's son.
I think.
It's funny, like I think in hindsight, my mom was so like weird about being a celebrity kid that I walked around with like an embarrassment of it.
Like she was very me. I was the same way.
Yeah, So her kind of the way she was was very much like, don't be an embarrassing celebrity kid, don't do don't be you know, all these sort of tropes like don't fall into these stereotypes and if you like her if she she really felt like she really didn't like attention. She was very like her experience being a very famous child was like I don't want this, like very much like I don't want this and I actually hate it. So that was projected onto us growing up too, which was like you don't go places unless you have to, you don't show up to the thing, Like there was no enjoying of the the or basking and the fame. It was like I hate it. I hate it so right, that was her vibe, and so that was kind.
Of very nineties. It's a very eighties nineties vibe.
Right yeah. Yeah, yeah, so it was like very much like uh yeah, so I think there was a part of me that felt a little embarrassed.
Yeah, it was embarrassed. I also just didn't want anyone to know, right. You know that was a big.
Thing for me, because are like two separate things, right, You're talking about more of like being a young kid, and for your mom, I'm assuming it was like what what what you would see a lot of which is like you know, even if you were like so many acts or is back in the nineties and stuff would be like, you know, you only did David Letterman and like maybe a junket and like you never talked about things. Yeah, you're like, I don't talk to a reporter. I don't, I won't. I'm not going to do that. Like it was like cool to not not do it.
Yeah, yeah, but I do think that it probably like what you were saying, Oliver, like I'd also had that outside of work where I didn't tell I didn't want and I say this with my little sisters, like you don't they didn't want people to know, because I think they wanted. I wanted to like have genuine connections with people and friendships. So I definitely like wasn't telling people, and I would go really far with it and pretend that like you know, I don't know, like try and be just a person that.
Yeah, oh yeah, yeah yeah. I would make it a point to have you know, make people not know, you know, I mean it was going to camp and like that was Blonwe we told the story a million times, but like you know, basically Mom revealed herself in a crazy way at camp and we're trying to be anonymous and a seaplane flies over and she gets out. She goes, yeah, I'm here. I mean it was like intense, right.
I had like three different names that I would like like my my, like rotating personalities with like different accents.
You know.
I think that I think the harder parts have been would be to me informing genuine connections and as a kid and that kind of thing and just wanting to yeah, present as a person.
When you know, when your mom passed, you know, I have to say, like watching you and I told you this in person, but I watching the way that you've really kind of like you know, been talking about it and expressing yourself around your mother is such a I don't brave. It feels like such a silly word, but it just it. I guess I really admire it because you're it must be so hard to do, you know, to like finish the work of your mom. You know, I know this book is really your mom was working on it and you sort of then were really like had to see something through for her and then to go out and then talk about her and talk about your relationship with her, Like you're doing it in such a graceful, wonderful way, and I just I really do admire it. Riley. It's it's it must at some moments feel very challenging, but maybe I'm maybe I'm just projecting.
I think it's challenging because it's really counterintuitive, like and that's what I've had to really work through, like being open about my family and again, like it was always like secret secrets, don't talk about this, and the fact that my mom even wanted to write a book was really out of character kind of but I think it was just towards the end of her life or and she was reflecting on a lot of things and feeling like if she shared these things with other people that they might relate in like the human experience and not feel so alone in the world. And that was so important to her that that has kind of pushed me through, you know, the uncomfortable moments, and and it's it's ego for me, you know, it's like my ego is like, oh, don't don't do that, Like it's I don't know, I can't explain it, but I feel very like it's not me I would have chosen to do.
I was just about to ask that question, how much of how much of this is for your mother and how much of this is for yourself doing this book?
It's one hundred percent from my mother, and it's in fact makes me a little bit uncomfortable sometimes. But the way through that to me is just being open and and gen you know, as opposed to like closed off and deserve men.
That's interesting because it's one hundred percent for your mom, which means that you would never have done this, you know normally. Right, So now after you have done it, would you say that that percentage has changed a little bit after you have completed it and gone through some of the processes of promoting or is still one hundred percent or are you like, you know what, I'm taking something from this now, but I didn't think I was going to.
I think that I really have, like the it's actually a privilege to be able to publish a book with your family's history in it, and I actually think it's such an amazing thing to leave also to my daughter and my grandchildren. And so that part of this has been for me in a sense, like I think it's really amazing to have this book that now my grandchildren can read and that exists forever. So that's for selfishly, I that's what I like about this process, is that this thing exists now that you know, my children can read and their children can read. And then I think that back to what we were saying earlier, like being super candid and honest, I always find beneficial to myself, Like, so there's things in this book that are things that not a lot of people know who are are new before the book, and detailed experiences of things that were really traumatic in my life that you knew if you were in my friend group, but you didn't know if you're you know, just a human in the world, and there's something really cathartic about taking things out of like I was saying, out of the sort of dark and and anyone to see sort of bearing your heart.
And yeah, you talk about like depression and the cycle of addiction generationally, and and you know, I I would think too that would also kind of like again, like they say that it's sort of like you know, breaking cycles or like breaking the you know, cutting cutting through that circle and maybe starting a different path is also for your daughter, for your sisters, for yeah, you.
Know, and a lot of people through the press have kind of said, how does it feel to break the cycle, And I'm I don't know if I have you know, it's a lot of it's a lot of pressure to put on me. I hope it gets broken, but I don't know if I've done that, you know. So I think that that's that's something where I'm I feel like I was lucky that I didn't get addiction and I didn't. It wasn't something I was you know, I yeah, it wasn't something that I chose or didn't choose or was strong through. It was. I just didn't have that.
It's it's one of those things, you know, where it really it really does, you know, it can really like follow it. Like that's why they ask, you know, when you're you have a history of depression in your family, do you know? And when it affects people, you just wish you could just take it. You just wish you could take it away, you know, because especially when you don't have those experiences, you know, where you don't actually relate to it. Yeah, but you see someone suffering.
I wonder if there's a genetic Again, I don't know the science, but as far as whether or not, you know, addiction is genetic, depressionist genetic, and I think there probably is some connection there that learned you know, nature, nurture, learned behavior or not. You know. But with your kid, I mean, is this something that you will be hyper aware of as she grows.
It's something that I am definitely I'm gonna think about because I didn't as a kid, you know, I didn't really I guess there was in hindsight, addiction sort of growing all around me, but there wasn't really an awareness of it. It would just to me felt like we like to party a lot, you know, I didn't feel problematic. So now definitely my like awareness of addiction is much stronger, and I think I do have anxiety around it, you.
Know, Yeah, I always think too.
I wonder I would be interesting to talk to like someone who studies it. But I always think it's just the right brain thing. Like very creative people who lean more right brain, they don't have a lot of access to the linear. And this is just me. I could talking about something I don't really know, just my you know, I guess a theory. But is that that because that is sort of where depression sits. It's where anxiety. It's all right brained activity that if if you're too overstimulated in your right brain, or if that's the thing that's working all the time, that it's going to lend itself to you know, depression, which I think also is probably interconnected with addiction. But that would be actually a really interesting podcast, Oliver, that we haven't done.
You should talk to an addiction specialist. I mean, it's so that's what's so. Yeah, It's like there's so many stories, like so many different versions of it. Like my mom's was so weird. She wasn't an addict at all, and then when she was forty she was so you never.
Like it's it's that's crazy.
I always wonder about the genetic component.
I don't know how everyone's a little bit different, you know. When it comes to that.
And it's filling, I think it's filling some void or some whole m h feeling of emptiness and you know how it gets there, I don't know.
Yeah, ok, God, Yeah, sometimes I get nervous, like, you.
Know, a little.
You know, I'm not drinking a lot.
I like to drink.
Yeah, I mean, I've been better in the last you know, couple weeks, meaning I'm not drinking during the week, but on the weekend I'll sort of time on. But I would get I was in the cycle of like just drinking every day and it wasn't just a glass of wine or two. I would sit down, but I'd enjoy it. I'd be at my computer and googling shit and fishing and reading articles, and all of a sudden, I've had like eighteen whiskeys and smoked a pack of cigarettes, and just like Jesus Christ, dude was like, what the fuck? And it was just kept happening.
We also live in a world that's like telling us every day that feeling anything negative is wrong. And that we have to be happy twenty four to seven. I think it sets us up to fail because all of these things, like depression has a purpose, anxiety as a purpose. Like we're human beings and we're meant to feel lots of things, and I think we especially with social media, and it's just like it's it's there's like labels for things that are where you feel like then something's fundamentally wrong with you, Like I have depression. I have anxiety when it's just like the human condition.
Too, Yeah, not with you. I mean I've suffered from anxiety since my early twenties. Someone likes the pro and.
Am I anxiety?
Yeah? I have crazy anxiety and like you know, I've I've mitigated it with drugs, but you know, I've had my bouts where it's been nuts, where I tried to wean off and then just fall into this place of complete I mean it's I I wouldn't wish it upon the worst en. I mean, the feeling is so awful.
Dreadful, But I like being told that something is wrong with you, right in certain situations.
Yeah, Like someone said to me one time, which I thought was really great, and just how you talk to your kids about it, which is when they're feeling anxiety or you're feeling that it's actually like to look at it differently, like that's good. That means your brain is doing what it's supposed to do. The question then becomes, how do we navigate this in this world versus the world that your brain's living in at the moment, which is that fight or flight.
Totally, I think that that's somewhere that we are not very evolved as like in terms of helping people navigate through difficult emotions, navigate through anxiety and depression. Like, there's not a lot of resources that actually are really workable, and I think that that should be focused on and not so much that like something's wrong. I don't know, I just throughout all my experiences something that has not been sitting well with me is like the idea that we're like not meant to feel.
Yeah. Total, we're part of a billion a billion percent and that's what's made it easier for me too. I mean, first of all, the idea that you are not your anxiety, you know what I mean, like you were not We attach ourselves to those feelings when in reality they're completely separate, you know, I mean, we are not that feeling. It just is a feeling that happens an experience.
Yeah, it seems like when you're in it. Though, when you're in it, it's like you're saying like it's so hard to separate that that even someone's saying like you are not your anxiety, Ollie, like in those moments, like you know, it's like it's even hard.
It's hard for you to see that, sure, sure, I mean you know it's like you eat too much weed and you're like, I know I'm not going to die because you can't from THHC. But that doesn't mean that I feel like my heart's about to explode.
No, it doesn't take away like the knowingness of it doesn't take away the panic.
Of a p sure, sure, but it can it can sort of just squash that feeling, that that over the top feeling where you can ruminate so much that you lose your shit. You're feeling and it hurts, and there's pain, like sometimes physical pain. But when you understand it enough and you've been through it enough and experienced it enough like I have, you can I can now just say, oh, well, I'm feeling this, but all right, I'm cool, I'm not going to lose.
Well, I felt this before, right, exactly got through it, and I yeah, I definitely as you get older, I think you realize it. Resistance to anything, whether it's anxiety, depression, Yeah, like anything is like creates more, you know, grow. Resistance is persistence. I love a bumper sticker, but I really think that's true.
Yeah, I agree.
I also think what you're saying is so right, which is like some somewhere down the line, like it's this idea that you're living. I like the idea of striving for like something that feels like optimum, right, Like that's it's your right. I love that. But the reality is is that that you It's like this, like like if you think that the goal is to get to this place and that's the that you're and you're going to stay there and we're just living in like this weird delusional space, Yeah, I do.
It's so true. I try to almost try to appreciate the really amazing moments in the day or in my week where it's like, wow, I feel fucking perfect right now. I'm like, oh my god, it's like I'm incredible. Everything's life is. Yeah, it's like everything's lined up for like twenty minutes and now that that's gone.
Yeah, I mean, look, who's to say maybe the goal is is to be in that state all the time. I don't know, but I know that like no one is, and that like everybody suffers and has a crazy experience in this world. And I think that that's where it gets so personal. It's like somebody's life like experience and lesson if you will, might be to be optimum the whole time, and somebody else's might be to grow, you know, strength through having panic attacks every day, you know. So it's everyone's so different. So I think that it's like, you know, accepting your own experience.
I listened to almost like every morning.
I listened to There's like a rod to like beat like chill beats.
He's He's just every morning I put on like a three to eight minute lecture or pieces of his lecture.
Where do you hear it? Like on YouTube?
I'll send it to you. I'll send yeah, yeah, it's it's it's really, it's really something. And the other day I listened to this one that was like, you know, open heart is basically about like having an open heart and listening and like, I think those are two things that we're forgetting. No, I say we, I mean that's just I think it's two things that would be nice to add to all of this, like living your optimum life wellness and well, it's like actually having an open heart and really listening to somebody or listening to the experience that might be happening. It only lends itself to compassion. And no matter what someone's experiencing, if you're someone who's really looking to like lead their life in that way, then you're only gonna let in compassionate connectivity. And there's something about that, Like if someone's struggling or suffering and people are like, I want to help this, I want to fix this. Sometimes what really it just is is just being like is just really hearing them?
Yeah, yeah, No, I know it's it's it's it's tough because I'm so with you and I look trust me, I like, I love a good Brahm dos or quote or the fuzzy feelings of these things.
Not leading with your open heart.
No, but listen to me, Listen to me, because what happens is you hear these inspirational sort of teachings and sayings and in the moment you're like yeah, oh yes, uh and then it ends and you're like, okay, now what, like how do I do that?
Implement?
How do I implement that? And then and then and then speaking to your thing about open heart and compassion and all these things. I totally agree. I wish there was self help that takes into account all of the trauma or pain or the things that won't allow you to actually open up and feel those things because we all are calloused with that. It's easy to hear it and it maybe makes you feel good in that moment, but then you have to almost dig through your own shit to actually feel it. You know.
That's why listening like why it.
Sorry Oliver Hudson, but like really like.
Listening, Like like I think that's it's also like becomes about It's like it's like you're it becomes your own experience, like personal experience, Like it demands of you to stop thinking about yourself.
No, I get it, I get it. But then I'm like, here's here, give me an example. Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna listen. And now I'm like, am I listening good enough? And I'm now I'm worried about my own listening instead of actually listening, like should I look, should I break eye contact or like look away? Oliver, Yeah, do you mean it? It's hard for me. I mean I used to a ton, honestly, and now no, I mean I really need to put it back into play because I.
Think that, like the mind chatter is the heart is really hard. And I think that I think it actually does take discipline, like exercise, Like I think that it's like all good things take work, and I think that just like having a fit body, you have to exercise your mind. And I think meditation is you know, it is is is great. But the thing is with it is that it has to be something you really work at, you know, and it's not about and it's a it's also hard. It's not about what's sending out and feeling good.
That's my bumper sticker. Contentment is discipline.
Yeah, That's why I think that, like there is something to discipline in the mind because mind chatter is so ugh.
Yeah, isn't it funny though? Because you don't I like to run now and again, like I I can spend an hour there, an hour doing the gym, five minutes in a meditation. I resist. I mean I make an excuse not to do it when it's literally five to ten minutes of just sitting there and quiet. I mean, it's crazy.
I have a couple things like, and I think that we have to touch on Graceland a little bit because obviously, like it almost feels like this magical place that everyone you just wish you could like be in it, but you actually like have slept there, you hosted there, and and like, what how do you see Graceland, Like what's your connection to Graceland other than in.
My lifetime it's only been a museum. So I did have, you know, that awareness as a child growing up. But also my mom was really like adamant on us having experiences there that felt like a family and a home. So we usually would just go at night and we'd have dinner there and we would hang out in the house and run around golf on golf carts. So a lot of my memories there were very joyful, very fun like family filled, family dinner type things. As we got older, we would you know, have drinks in the you know, jungle room and hang out till very late.
So it was like a lot of joy can we go together and have drinks in the jungle room.
You don't understand, Kate. You need to ask Jamie and and company about what happened it Gracelands stays at Graceland.
Can I come? I want to be invited?
Can we do it?
Girls Weekend at Graceland.
Something happens there where it makes everyone just feel I don't know, there's like an energy there and every time you're there and I have friends, it's like there's some wild stuff going on.
I want in. I want in Girls Weekend and then we'll go do our like holistic. We'll start at Graceland and then.
We'll the Southern food and the wild, and.
Then we'll go do our medical like we get some spa and like eight hundred calories. You know, I mean, I I know this sounds like you know, do you do you have moments where you just can't believe your mom's not here? Like through this whole process, Like does it almost feel surreal?
That A lot of my life in the past ten years feels very surreal? And I do spend a lot of time going what the fuck just happened? Like from about twenty sixteen until now, my life was very bizarre. So I it's like a lot of trying to process what's happened because we had this like very normal, seemingly great life and then everything sort of got turned upside down around twenty sixteen and around when my mom's addiction started, So it was it's it's definitely I'm still processing, like the difference in my early you know, whole childhood and early twenties into into now, and there's been so much so I do I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm like, what the fuck? Like this is crazy?
Yeah, how does how does that?
How does that happen? How does I mean, I asked this an insane question, but how do you become how do you become an addict? Forty er?
You know?
How does that work?
I think it was a combination of a lot of things. I think that she she always would say, you know, if I was to try drugs, they would take me out because I'm the kind of person who's like goes hard basically, And she would say that all the time. And I think she would like she always had her father in mind, and I think that she basically, I don't know. She had a C section, was given oxy cotton and got really addicted did and I think it also numbed a pain that was probably there and growing her whole life. Yeah, it was just like a sort of I don't know, emptiness or a broken heart that grew. And I think that in that time she'd also like kind of lost a lot of her friends in her community, and so there were a lot of things that play.
In that exact moment, perfect storm kind of Yeah.
Yeah, Well, I just love you. I sometimes feel like I want to, Like I had this thing. I was talking to my mom the other day and I was like, I don't know what is about Riley, I just want to, like everyone's want just like I see you on something and I was like, I just want to like give you like a massive hug, you.
Know, because you feel bad for me, No.
Just because I love I love you like I love your energy, the inner voice. I love your energy. I like I said, like I really admire how you know you've been through a lot, and you're really young and you're a great mom, and but you're you have this like gentleness about you that I just I just love you so much.
We've never met, but it's just so chill and I feel like we can just sort of sit cross leg and on some sort of like you know, like blumpy couch and just kind of have a tea and talk for hours.
But don't be fooled, Oliver, I have mad anxiety.
Well, you and I, You and I can panic together on the couch as well if you want.
So funny, like, I get that a lot where people are like, You're so like chill and grounded or whatever, and I'm like, I have crazy anxiety.
Yeah, but it's interesting because sometimes that chill nature. Of course, that is your true nature, but chill to me, I'm pretty I am pretty chill. But I use my sort of you know, voisterous maybe trying to be funny, yourself deprecating, to sometimes mask how I might actually be feeling. I don't want people to know that I'm hurting, you know, in one way or another. When I had my crazy anxiety, when I'm going through my bouts, I mean, I had three kids, I was having to be a dad, I was trying to be out in the street, I was trying to fucking do shit for them, and all the while like losing my mind, you know.
Yeah, relatable. Yeah, anyway, continue saying.
No I just feel like there's like the maternal instinct in me that's like always mommy vibes, but like that wants to like like like be with you and like hug you and all of a sudden, and then there's the like girlfriend part of me that wants to like cuddle and watch some show.
I can be both both there, it's both there.
I havings like but but uh, but also I have a little inside baseball on you too, so like there's also like, for instance, Jamie said, so so so just to explain, Jamie is sweet baby Jamie, who is Riley's our mutual friend, my bestie I'm assuming a very besty friend of you as well for you, but also your stylist. Yes, And but anyway, she was saying that how amazing it was to watch you because you're after days of Joe's and the six you've been singing a little bit more a little bit and and for me, like I kind of have to, like you know, get into it, and I get excited and I get this energy going. And Jamie was like, I don't know what it is, like she has to go sing and then like she's just talking and it's like it doesn't even hit her and then she just goes out and she just sings, like no anxiety.
I have like a chip missing in my brain, which might be the girlfriend experience thing too, where I don't get embarrassed, Like I don't feel embarrassed. That's an emotion.
I was like, I have to now that is just like I wish I had more of that. What an amazing thing.
But also there's the stakes are higher because you're actually a good singer, and I'm like a good, very good singer. So to me, it's kind of like funny and I don't take it very seriously. But you're like a real singer, you know. So I think that I don't like put a lot of pressure on myself because I I'm not really a singer, but I'm like an actor who's singing a little here and there.
You know.
Oh, come on, you're a good singer, are you? Are you gonna? Is there a Daisy Jones in the sixth Tour or is that just not a real thing?
Or every single day of my life people ask me if there's a Daisy Jones in the sixth Tour, And I hope one day there will maybe so hot it will happen. But you know, maybe we'll something will happen and we'll take it on the road and tour together.
You should do it Europe.
Should we do it?
Daisy Jones Kate Hudson Tour.
Yeah, I'm in. I'll open for Daisy Jones.
No, we'll open for you.
It's called the Daisy Chain Tour.
Wait.
By the way, so much of Daisy Jones was inspired by almost famous like.
Oh my well, when I watched it, I was like, oh, I did have moments where I'm like, I feel like I experience all of.
The like the costume photos, like all of the wardrobe, like every all the images were almost famous, like all of those awesome.
Was it so fun? Did you have the best time?
It was so fun?
Yeah?
So fun. A lot of the prep was fun because you know when you like getting to I didn't sing or play guitar anything, so getting to like learn a new skill set like that is such a unique thing to actors that it's like so fun that you get to just like pretend to be a musician for a few ones.
It's so fun or whatever.
A stripper, a sex worker.
It's part of what it was. Like I always say to people when it's like we didn't get into this industry to do the same thing.
Exactly, like we just wanted I were here.
Yeah, this has been amazing. It's just been fun.
Thank you guys for having me. Yes, I love doing podcasts with people I know or sort of know because it's so much more fun.
It just feels easier and it definitely creates more clickbaits.
So yeah, exactly, Yeah, yeah, Kate has an ancient spa ben easier, many time fun.
That would be the best. That would be the best headline coming out of this.
All right, Well, hopefully I'll see you soon.
Yes, definitely.
Okay, nice to meet you, Thank you, Nice to meet you too.
All right By Guy
