How Putting Your Kids First Harms Your Marriage (Marriage & Family Series)

Put your kids first? Nope! Listen to learn what happens when you elevate your children & their activities to where only your spouse belongs. 

If you have children, if you have ever struggled with finding the balance between taking care of your children and nurturing your marriage, well, then friend, this conversation is for you. If you’re Christian, you’ve likely heard of that J-O-Y acronym. Jesus. Others. You. So many of us were raised with this whole idea that you always come last. Everybody is first. You're always last. When you get married, your spouse is first. But then when you have kids, (we don't say this, but we do this), we end up putting our kids even before our spouse. So in many families, this is how it looks. Your kids are first. Your spouse might come in there second. Friends, neighbors, responsibilities, jobs. Third, if you have a relationship with the Lord. He's probably third or fourth in there, somewhere in the mix. And then you are, like, on the bottom, bottom, bottom of the totem pole. And somehow that's supposed to make us feel like we're great mothers or we're great parents. That is so lopsided, and it's so destructive to you, and it’s also destructive to your family. 

Find the full show notes at https://realrelationshiptalk.com/episode159. 



Links Mentioned in this Episode: 

Episode 157: When You Disagree on How to Discipline the Kids 

Take my Free “How Connected a Partner Are You” Quiz 

Episode 155: Why Your Kids Need You to Get a Room 

7 Lessons Your Marriage is Teaching Your Kids

How Putting Your Kids First Harms Your Marriage (Marriage &amp; Family Series)
Put your kids first? Nope! Listen to learn what happens when you elevate your children &amp; their activities to where only your spouse belongs. 
If you have children, if you have ever struggled with finding the balance between taking care of your children and nurturing your marriage, well, then friend, this conversation is for you. If you’re Christian, you’ve likely heard of that J-O-Y acronym. Jesus. Others. You. So many of us were raised with this whole idea that you always come last. Everybody is first. You're always last. When you get married, your spouse is first. But then when you have kids, (we don't say this, but we do this), we end up putting our kids even before our spouse. So in many families, this is how it looks. Your kids are first. Your spouse might come in there second. Friends, neighbors, responsibilities, jobs. Third, if you have a relationship with the Lord. He's probably third or fourth in there, somewhere in the mix. And then you are, like, on the bottom, bottom, bottom of the totem pole. And somehow that's supposed to make us feel like we're great mothers or we're great parents. That is so lopsided, and it's so destructive to you, and it’s also destructive to your family. 
Find the full show notes at <a href="https://realrelationshiptalk.com/episode159">https://realrelationshiptalk.com/episode159</a>. 
 
Links Mentioned in this Episode: 
<a href="https://realrelationshiptalk.com/157-when-you-disagree-on-how-to-discipline-the-kids-marriage-family-series/">Episode 157: When You Disagree on How to Discipline the Kids </a>
<a href="https://danache.com/partnerquiz">Take my Free “How Connected a Partner Are You” Quiz </a>
<a href="https://realrelationshiptalk.com/155-why-your-kids-need-you-to-get-a-room-marriage-family-series/">Episode 155: Why Your Kids Need You to Get a Room </a>
<a href="https://realrelationshiptalk.com/153-7-lessons-your-marriage-is-teaching-your-kids-marriage-family-series/">7 Lessons Your Marriage is Teaching Your Kids</a>

Ever wonder if your marriage can feel close and alive again—even after disappointment, disconnection, or broken trust?

Rebuilding Us is a Christian marriage podcast featuring honest conversations about marriage, connection, and faith. Hosted by relationship expert, speaker, and author Dana Che, each episode provides biblical relationship advice and practical tools for couples who want deep, authentic connection and real hope—and enough humor to make the hard conversations a little easier.

Whether you’re struggling with communication, recurring conflict, emotional distance, rebuilding trust, infidelity, or simply wanting a deeper connection with your spouse, Rebuilding Us will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the surface—and what it takes to move forward.

Through solo teaching, real-life stories, and conversations with insightful guests, Dana brings warmth, wisdom, candor, and humor to the conversations couples are often afraid—or unsure how—to have.

You’ll learn how to move from conflict to connection, rebuild trust, strengthen intimacy, and grow together through every season of marriage.

Because relationships can get messy. Trust can be broken. Connection can fade.

But broken doesn’t have to mean beyond repair. We’re rebuilding what life tried to break.

Welcome to Rebuilding Us. 

Get Dana's latest book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples, wherever books are sold! 

Ever wonder if your marriage can feel close and alive again&mdash;even after disappointment, disconnection, or broken trust?
Rebuilding Us is a Christian marriage podcast featuring honest conversations about marriage, connection, and faith. Hosted by relationship expert, speaker, and author Dana Che, each episode provides biblical relationship advice and practical tools for couples who want deep, authentic connection and real hope&mdash;and enough humor to make the hard conversations a little easier.
Whether you&rsquo;re struggling with communication, recurring conflict, emotional distance, rebuilding trust, infidelity, or simply wanting a deeper connection with your spouse, Rebuilding Us will help you understand what&rsquo;s really happening beneath the surface&mdash;and what it takes to move forward.
Through solo teaching, real-life stories, and conversations with insightful guests, Dana brings warmth, wisdom, candor, and humor to the conversations couples are often afraid&mdash;or unsure how&mdash;to have.
You&rsquo;ll learn how to move from conflict to connection, rebuild trust, strengthen intimacy, and grow together through every season of marriage.
Because relationships can get messy. Trust can be broken. Connection can fade.
But broken doesn&rsquo;t have to mean beyond repair. We&rsquo;re rebuilding what life tried to break.
Welcome to Rebuilding Us.&nbsp;
Get Dana's latest book, <a href="https://danache.com/tried-and-true-book/" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=https://danache.com/triedandtrue&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1767879070424000&amp;usg=AOvVaw3Lc8E5zya32sng_mUFZb4t">Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples</a>,&nbsp;wherever books are sold!&nbsp;

Struggling with communication problems or broken trust in your relationship? Rebuilding Us is your weekly marriage podcast providing the tools and encouragement you need to overcome emotional hurt, rediscover the love you once shared, and rebuild your connection.

Rebuilding Us: Christian Marriage Advice for Couples

Ever wonder if your marriage can feel close and alive again—even after disappointment, disconnection, or broken trust?

Rebuilding Us is a Christian marriage podcast featuring honest conversations about marriage, connection, and faith. Hosted by relationship expert, speaker, and author Dana Che, each episode provides biblical relationship advice and practical tools for couples who want deep, authentic connection and real hope—and enough humor to make the hard conversations a little easier.

After 27 years of marriage, Dana knows that strong relationships aren’t built by avoiding hard seasons—they’re built by learning how to move through them well.

Whether you’re struggling with communication, recurring conflict, emotional distance, rebuilding trust, infidelity, or simply wanting a deeper connection with your spouse, Rebuilding Us will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the surface—and what it takes to move forward.

Through solo teaching, real-life stories, and conversations with insightful guests, Dana brings warmth, wisdom, candor, and humor to the conversations couples are often afraid—or unsure how—to have.

You’ll learn how to move from conflict to connection, rebuild trust, strengthen intimacy, and grow together through every season of marriage.

Because relationships can get messy. Trust can be broken. Connection can fade.

But broken doesn’t have to mean beyond repair. We’re rebuilding what life tried to break.

Welcome to Rebuilding Us. 

And be sure to get Dana's new book  Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples wherever books are sold! 

Ever wonder if your marriage can feel close and alive again&mdash;even after disappointment, disconnection, or broken trust?
Rebuilding Us is a Christian marriage podcast featuring honest conversations about marriage, connection, and faith. Hosted by relationship expert, speaker, and author Dana Che, each episode provides biblical relationship advice and practical tools for couples who want deep, authentic connection and real hope&mdash;and enough humor to make the hard conversations a little easier.
After 27 years of marriage, Dana knows that strong relationships aren&rsquo;t built by avoiding hard seasons&mdash;they&rsquo;re built by learning how to move through them well.
Whether you&rsquo;re struggling with communication, recurring conflict, emotional distance, rebuilding trust, infidelity, or simply wanting a deeper connection with your spouse, Rebuilding Us will help you understand what&rsquo;s really happening beneath the surface&mdash;and what it takes to move forward.
Through solo teaching, real-life stories, and conversations with insightful guests, Dana brings warmth, wisdom, candor, and humor to the conversations couples are often afraid&mdash;or unsure how&mdash;to have.
You&rsquo;ll learn how to move from conflict to connection, rebuild trust, strengthen intimacy, and grow together through every season of marriage.
Because relationships can get messy. Trust can be broken. Connection can fade.
But broken doesn&rsquo;t have to mean beyond repair. We&rsquo;re rebuilding what life tried to break.
Welcome to Rebuilding Us.&nbsp;
And be sure to get Dana's new book &nbsp;<a href="https://danache.com/triedandtrue" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=https://danache.com/triedandtrue&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1767879070424000&amp;usg=AOvVaw3Lc8E5zya32sng_mUFZb4t">Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples</a>&nbsp;wherever books are sold!&nbsp;

Put your kids first? Nope! Listen to learn what happens when you elevate your children & their activities to where only your spouse belongs.