Every morning the Half-Assed Morning Show is joined by the "Assman" himself, Randy Shaver, to talk about sports and whatever random topics that happen to come up that day.
Twins got a much-needed win. Best NFL players by jersey number. Banging in the bowling alley.
Happy birthday Brad! Randy Dobnak is the new David Ortiz. Best names in NCAA football.
Our pal C Willi Myles came and hung out. The Twins were buyers. We remember some former Vikings quarterbacks.
Twins got walked-off in back-to-back games. Trade deadline looms. The best sports video games.
The Twins did something pretty damn cool. Danahausen met Danhausen. Wrestling talk with Rob Page.
Legendary sports moments that are actually lies. Scooter accident at the ballpark.
The Tony Romo DUI footage is hilarious. The Twins confirm their trade deadline plans. The Vikings officially opened camp.
Jimothy the Mutant Raccoon. Calzone bobblehead. Famous athletes who were better than their famous fathers.
Gonna be a rollercoaster for the Twins this week. LeBron made his final decision. Hairy German porno.
We share stories about the Hulkster. Worst Vikings of all time. We found a list of the most obnoxious athletes of all time.
Strip club stories. The Twins might be dead in the water. Ozzy or Hulk?
Joe Ryan got pumped. The Red Sox are on a heater. Someone scored a Wilt warm-up shirt at a thrift store.
The World Cup has come to an end. KATHausen. The Twins have their biggest series of the season today.
Twins are back for the second half. ANT recruiting LeBron. I Play Rocky.
All-time great backup quarterbacks. Best nicknames in sports. The ESPYS happened.
MLB All-Star Game Sandlot tribute. There's a new Cybertruck in town. Weird athlete rituals. Originally aired Wednesday, July 15, 2026 on the 93X Half-Assed Morning Show.
The Home Run Derby was a lot of laughs. Best actors who portrayed athletes. Cooking with C Willi Myles.
Twins are much better than expected at the break. Wrestling at Target Field. LeBron to Minnesota rumors keep swirling.
Twins win another series. A first-ballot MLB pitcher is retiring. Mark Sanchez has a trial date set.
The Twins got some rough injury news for Buck. The LeBron carousel continues.
The US bombed out of the World Cup. The Twins are back in town. Happy boat cruise week!
A fond farewell to Naz. The Wild are making moves. Buck is an All-Star starter.
Wolves trade rumors are everywhere. Twins got swept by the champs. Dumbest athlete arrests of all time.
Night one of the NBA Draft. A statement on the Minnesota Twins. Drones at the World Cup.
The Wolves roster looks a lot different. The Twins fans are still PISSED. World Cup fans are obsessed with ranch.
The Twins are on a heater. A big trade in the NHL. Fine, we'll watch 3-on-3 basketball.
Brad fills in for Randy. Changes to the Home Run Derby. Twins are on a heater.
The Twins whooped up a batch. Having sex before a game. Five Torts.
Summer has officially begun. Weird Stanley Cup stories. Buxton is hotter than a 2 dollar pistol.
Goodbye NHL and NBA...we will check in on you from time to time. Twins won a series. World Cup fever.
The Stanley Cup continues to be incredible. Greatest Minnesota HS athlete of all time. The Twins are falling apart.
The Knicks had the greatest comeback in NBA history. Twins got a dub. Lacrosse team season ended over fake cigars.
The NBA Finals have gotten out of control. Twins got thumped. Wild made a great signing.
We have an NBA Finals after Game 3. Return of the Strudel. NIL is out of control.
We didn't have Randy Shaver...until we did have Randy Shaver. The NBA Finals and Stanley Cup are a ton of fun.
Janel Klein returned to the show. Our guy Marcus Foligno got a great honor. Another great Stanley Cup game.
Knicks take Game 1 of the NBA Finals. Stanley Pup. Best baseball players ever by number.
The Stanley Cup final is off to a hell of a start. Favorite porn stars. Sean Avery is a weird dude.
Randy gives us a recap of his golf event. Twins snap a losing streak. We lost some great people this week.
Randy Shaver checks-in from his annual golf tournament. The NBA Finals are set. The Twins took it in the shorts in Pittsburgh.
We've got an NBA Game 7. Randy has a new bobblehead. PUKE.
The Knicks are back in the NBA Finals for the first time in 27 years. Twins are looking good.
Vegas caught Colorado sleeping. Best linebackers of all-time on each NFL team.
Marcus Foligno joins us to wrap up the Wild season. AEW is coming to Target Field. Royce Lewis is on vacation in St Paul.
Games we played when we were 12. The Twins won a rain-soaked game. Wemby had a big one.
The Pigs are dead. Fart lighting celebration. Termite invasion!
The Pigs are up against it. Sports teams we'd kill for. LUDA!!!
The Wolves evened things up. St Paull will be crazy tonight. Getting ejected.
We share stories about Joe Senser. Every team is in action this weekend. ICP fans vs Wild fans.
We catch up with Moose and talk about the Avs series. The Wolves sucked. The Twins bullpen also sucks, but not as bad as the Wolves.