Every morning the Half-Assed Morning Show is joined by the "Assman" himself, Randy Shaver, to talk about sports and whatever random topics that happen to come up that day.
The Wolves roster looks a lot different. The Twins fans are still PISSED. World Cup fans are obsessed with ranch.
The Twins are on a heater. A big trade in the NHL. Fine, we'll watch 3-on-3 basketball.
Brad fills in for Randy. Changes to the Home Run Derby. Twins are on a heater.
The Twins whooped up a batch. Having sex before a game. Five Torts.
Summer has officially begun. Weird Stanley Cup stories. Buxton is hotter than a 2 dollar pistol.
Goodbye NHL and NBA...we will check in on you from time to time. Twins won a series. World Cup fever.
The Stanley Cup continues to be incredible. Greatest Minnesota HS athlete of all time. The Twins are falling apart.
The Knicks had the greatest comeback in NBA history. Twins got a dub. Lacrosse team season ended over fake cigars.
The NBA Finals have gotten out of control. Twins got thumped. Wild made a great signing.
We have an NBA Finals after Game 3. Return of the Strudel. NIL is out of control.
We didn't have Randy Shaver...until we did have Randy Shaver. The NBA Finals and Stanley Cup are a ton of fun.
Janel Klein returned to the show. Our guy Marcus Foligno got a great honor. Another great Stanley Cup game.
Knicks take Game 1 of the NBA Finals. Stanley Pup. Best baseball players ever by number.
The Stanley Cup final is off to a hell of a start. Favorite porn stars. Sean Avery is a weird dude.
Randy gives us a recap of his golf event. Twins snap a losing streak. We lost some great people this week.
Randy Shaver checks-in from his annual golf tournament. The NBA Finals are set. The Twins took it in the shorts in Pittsburgh.
We've got an NBA Game 7. Randy has a new bobblehead. PUKE.
The Knicks are back in the NBA Finals for the first time in 27 years. Twins are looking good.
Vegas caught Colorado sleeping. Best linebackers of all-time on each NFL team.
Marcus Foligno joins us to wrap up the Wild season. AEW is coming to Target Field. Royce Lewis is on vacation in St Paul.
Games we played when we were 12. The Twins won a rain-soaked game. Wemby had a big one.
The Pigs are dead. Fart lighting celebration. Termite invasion!
The Pigs are up against it. Sports teams we'd kill for. LUDA!!!
The Wolves evened things up. St Paull will be crazy tonight. Getting ejected.
We share stories about Joe Senser. Every team is in action this weekend. ICP fans vs Wild fans.
We catch up with Moose and talk about the Avs series. The Wolves sucked. The Twins bullpen also sucks, but not as bad as the Wolves.
The ManBearPigs might be in trouble. We ain't scared of the Spurs. Tallest NBA players of all time.
The Wolves aren't afraid of the Spurs. Everyone needed a heater after Wild game 1. Bad Girl of the PWHL.
The Wolves are in trouble. The Wild have their PIVOTAL Game 5 tonight. Twins got back on track.
Good and bad news for the Wolves. Twins are officially in a slump. Pigs even the series.
Denver disrespected greatness. The Pig got a big one. Tossing a rotisserie on the ice.
The Wild game went late. Wolves have a big one tonight. DRAFT DAY!
Both playoffs series are coming back to Minnesota even. Twins get the Mets for three. Blowing a No-Hitter.
The Pigs whooped some ass. The Wolves need to get it together. Brock is retiring.
Pigs are playing mind games with the Stars. A wonderful blow. Most dongs given up.
Marcus Foligno previews the playoffs. Randy and Brad are mad at the Wolves. It's not always naked pool parties at Target Field.
Strangest baseball injuries of all time. Wrestlemania weekend is upon us. Nobody believed in us.
Star Search grand prize winners. Drunk contract signings. Getting hit in the FACE.
The next round of The Masters. The Wolves Round 1 playoff opponent is set. Statue unveiling gone wrong.
Twins own ABS. The Pigs dumped one in Dallas. The Wild signed a Viking.
The Twins are the hottest team in baseball history. JV Wolves. Randy's Masters leaderboard.
Our coworker Marcus Foligno scored a goal. Traditions that are unlike any other. Top 10 baseball players to never get a ring.
Hail to the Victors. The Wolves are heading in the wrong direction. Mouth of the South.
Brad is jacking off. You can't please everyone...unless you're Sasha Grey. No power at Target Field.
Being a grandparent rules. The Wild got a big win. Top 10 longest dongs of all time.
The Twins game was a disaster. Stone Cold can do anything. Quinn Hughes is a weird dude.
The Twins couldn't get anything going. Worst athlete acting performances. Timberwolves get bad injury news.
Twins manager makes MLB history. Update on the spouse bracket. North Star history.
Nebraska embarrassed themselves. The Twins dumped one on Opening Day. Olivia Dunne the equestrian.
The Sweet 16 is here. Snot Otters. A headline Nick can't even read because it's too disgusting.