Every morning the Half-Assed Morning Show is joined by the "Assman" himself, Randy Shaver, to talk about sports and whatever random topics that happen to come up that day.
Kyler Murray is back. Teams that have moved from town-to-town. Pigs are back.
The Vikings beat the Bears in a throwback game. Herpes outbreaks. Tallest football players in history.
Vikings long-snapper Andrew DePaola. Testicle trouble. Weird Quinn Hughes keeps being weird.
An NFL MVP is scared of spiders. Silver-linings for the Twins. Bucketless hockey players.
A-1 from Day-1 has a new show. Twins are done and dusted. That Mahomes guy returned.
We have our first chat of the season with Vikings long-snapper Andrew DePaula. Hazing sucks. Now or never for the Twins.
The NFL opened with a clunker. Athletes that have hosted SNL. That weird Quinn Hughes guy continues to be weird.
The Twins just won't die. The NFL kicks off another season. Antarctica conspiracy theories.
Brad at the Fair. The boat is being rowed in Dinkytown. Darth Vadar makes an appearance.
We handle sports without the boys. Youth sports coaches keep giving us more material . Row the Boat!
Youth sports might need to end. Bang Bros running wild. Shaver is going to his favorite place on earth today.
Baseball equivalent of an empty-net goal. The JJ McCarthy situation is getting weird. Wild have a new TV home.
We catch up with our good pal Clay Matvick. The Vikings set their 53-man roster. Hockey is coming.
Now or never for the Twins. Famous college football pranks. Painting the anchor.
The Wolves starting five is set. The Twins might be cooked. The hardest positions in all of sports.
The Twins season is fading away. The latest rumors on the weird Hughes kid. Playing sports over the age of 55.
Entertainer C Willi Myles. Twins picked up a dub in Sacmental. Robots are taking over.
Twins had a forgetful series in San Diego. ANT is knee-deep in child support payments. Joanie loves Chachi.
The green dil-dongs are back. Pooping your pants so bad you end up in the hospital. Owning a pronto-pup machine.
Sweep is the word at Target Field. Lynx closing in on clinching. The guys who invented the 69 are rich.
Youth sports can be a nightmare. HOA disaster stories. Surprise Banana Ball appearance.
The Twins are hanging on by a thread. Vikings got tough injury news. KG's jersey is going in the rafters.
The Twins got their asses kicked in Iowa. The Bang Bros went to Paris. The Vikings already have a preseason game.
Field of Dreams game is tonight. An NFL rookie bought his girlfriend a $300K car. Stay away from the fish.
The Vikings have a starting QB. Iowa is behind on technology. Worst NFL QBs of all time.
Twins off to a good start against Baltimore. Entertainer C Willi Myles. Forgetting your anniversary.
Twins dumped another series. Most strikeouts in MLB history . Some old friends visited Target Field.
Twins got a much-needed win. Best NFL players by jersey number. Banging in the bowling alley.
Happy birthday Brad! Randy Dobnak is the new David Ortiz. Best names in NCAA football.
Our pal C Willi Myles came and hung out. The Twins were buyers. We remember some former Vikings quarterbacks.
Twins got walked-off in back-to-back games. Trade deadline looms. The best sports video games.
The Twins did something pretty damn cool. Danahausen met Danhausen. Wrestling talk with Rob Page.
Legendary sports moments that are actually lies. Scooter accident at the ballpark.
The Tony Romo DUI footage is hilarious. The Twins confirm their trade deadline plans. The Vikings officially opened camp.
Jimothy the Mutant Raccoon. Calzone bobblehead. Famous athletes who were better than their famous fathers.
Gonna be a rollercoaster for the Twins this week. LeBron made his final decision. Hairy German porno.
We share stories about the Hulkster. Worst Vikings of all time. We found a list of the most obnoxious athletes of all time.
Strip club stories. The Twins might be dead in the water. Ozzy or Hulk?
Joe Ryan got pumped. The Red Sox are on a heater. Someone scored a Wilt warm-up shirt at a thrift store.
The World Cup has come to an end. KATHausen. The Twins have their biggest series of the season today.
Twins are back for the second half. ANT recruiting LeBron. I Play Rocky.
All-time great backup quarterbacks. Best nicknames in sports. The ESPYS happened.
MLB All-Star Game Sandlot tribute. There's a new Cybertruck in town. Weird athlete rituals. Originally aired Wednesday, July 15, 2026 on the 93X Half-Assed Morning Show.
The Home Run Derby was a lot of laughs. Best actors who portrayed athletes. Cooking with C Willi Myles.
Twins are much better than expected at the break. Wrestling at Target Field. LeBron to Minnesota rumors keep swirling.
Twins win another series. A first-ballot MLB pitcher is retiring. Mark Sanchez has a trial date set.
The Twins got some rough injury news for Buck. The LeBron carousel continues.
The US bombed out of the World Cup. The Twins are back in town. Happy boat cruise week!
A fond farewell to Naz. The Wild are making moves. Buck is an All-Star starter.
Wolves trade rumors are everywhere. Twins got swept by the champs. Dumbest athlete arrests of all time.