Numbers are your portal to progress.  What happened to England when all Jews were expelled? What happened to England when they returned?  Start devoting a few hours every week to improving your numerical literacy.  Stop telling yourself you can’t do math.  Nothing too complicated, just start on becoming more familiar with numbers than you are.  In Hebrew all five verbs for counting each also mean aristocrat (count) or prominence, power, and prestige.  Amazing Biblical coincidences.   When you can effectively number something, you can effectively change it.  Your weight, your bank balance, your number of friends, your charitable giving. Numbering everything is a key to success.  Gradually grow in numerical literacy to the point you’ll get to understand statistics, probability and calculus.