Even after years of sharing space, disagreements over the division of labour within the home can crop up, especially when one spouse feels the other isn’t pulling their weight or, worse, is lazy. When there are piles of laundry, dishes spilling from sink to countertops, the kids need baths, and it feels like a zillion other things need attention, it’s unsurprising that tensions can run high if one partner feels as though they bear the brunt while the other…doesn’t.

Pabi Moloi Speaks to relationship coach Luzuko Nobongoza.