Nine months, you’re told. Nine months for your baby to grow, nine months for you to do up the nursery, nine months to make sure the car seat is installed properly and nine months to mentally prepare yourself for Motherhood. Nine months that you expect you will get, a countdown with an estimated end date to work with. But what if you only got seven months? This was the case for Laura.

<p>Nine months, you&rsquo;re told. Nine months for your baby to grow, nine months for you to do up the nursery, nine months to make sure the car seat is installed properly and nine months to mentally prepare yourself for Motherhood. Nine months that you expect you will get, a countdown with an estimated end date to work with. But what if you only got seven months? This was the case for Laura.</p>

Mikki (or Mikaela to her Grandparents and maybe three other people) is a wildly famous writer. She travels the world with nothing but her 4b pencil (she's a commitment-phobe) and a pair of Havaianas. She writes inspiring poetry on the walls of famous streets, spreading her message of why you should never mix peppermint with genitals. 

She's also lying to you.

In reality she spends her time telling her one year old to "Stop being an asshole just because you have nice eyebrows". Sometimes Mikki talks about her feelings. Mostly she just swears and gives unsolicited advice. Either way nobody asked her anything and yet here she is with her own podcast.

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