Are you making time for the kind of love you want?

Do you feel like you’re ready to stop repeating old patterns?

Today, Jay welcomes Jared Freid and Jordana Abraham, hosts of the hit dating podcast U Up?, for a candid, lighthearted look at modern love. Together with Jay, they unpack why dating feels tougher than ever, from app burnout to myths about what it means to be “dateable,” and how negativity online makes the process feel heavier than it is. Instead of rigid rules, they offer a mindset shift: lead with curiosity, keep your attitude light, and build on a life you already love, not one you expect someone else to complete.

The conversation dives deeper into the nuances of attraction, commitment, and the subtle ways we self-sabotage. Jared shares how men often end relationships early, not out of rejection, but out of fear of responsibility and the lure of endless options. Jordana, emphasizes how mindset is 70% of dating, and how showing up fulfilled and confident makes you more magnetic than trying to “fit” someone else’s ideal. Together they discuss the unrealistic pressures of the social media highlight reel and how that can warp expectations and undermine authentic connections. 

In this interview, you'll learn:

How to Date Without the Negativity

How to Be the Best Version of Yourself on a Date

How to Turn Confusion Into Clear Boundaries

How to Avoid Self-Sabotaging in Relationships

How to Stay Grounded Amid Social Media Comparisons

How to Build Confidence by Building a Full Life Outside Dating

The most powerful shift you can make is choosing to approach love with openness, positivity, and confidence in your own worth. When you lead with curiosity instead of fear, with joy instead of judgment, you not only create better connections, but you also become more grounded in who you are.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. 

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

03:36 Negativity Doesn't Make You a Better Dater 

07:55 Dating Burnout 

14:27 You Shouldn’t Just Rely on Dating Apps!

18:06 The Checklist for Dating

22:34 Staying Single in Your 40s

23:59 The #1 Reason Why Men Go on Dates

27:05 Attitude Is Everything

29:45 What is The Best Relationship Advice?

21:18 How to Be the Best Version of Yourself

35:19 Don't Fall for Social Media Relationships

36:01 Using ChatpGPT to Create Messages

39:00 Why Small Talks Matter

42:06 Do Men Actually Have More Dating Options?

44:51 The One That Got Away

47:42 Are Men and Women Different in Long-Term Relationships?

50:15 Difficult Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have 

52:20 The Fear Most Men Have When Dating

57:28 What Makes a Successful Marriage? 

01:03:27 Marriage is Choosing Your Partner Every Day 

01:05:30 Jared and Jordana on Final Five  

Episode Resources:

U Up? | YouTube

U Up? | Instagram

U Up? | X

U Up? | TikTok

Are you making time for the kind of love you want?
Do you feel like you&rsquo;re ready to stop repeating old patterns?
Today, Jay welcomes Jared Freid and Jordana Abraham, hosts of the hit dating podcast U Up?, for a candid, lighthearted look at modern love. Together with Jay, they unpack why dating feels tougher than ever, from app burnout to myths about what it means to be &ldquo;dateable,&rdquo; and how negativity online makes the process feel heavier than it is. Instead of rigid rules, they offer a mindset shift: lead with curiosity, keep your attitude light, and build on a life you already love, not one you expect someone else to complete.
The conversation dives deeper into the nuances of attraction, commitment, and the subtle ways we self-sabotage. Jared shares how men often end relationships early, not out of rejection, but out of fear of responsibility and the lure of endless options. Jordana, emphasizes how mindset is 70% of dating, and how showing up fulfilled and confident makes you more magnetic than trying to &ldquo;fit&rdquo; someone else&rsquo;s ideal. Together they discuss the unrealistic pressures of the social media highlight reel and how that can warp expectations and undermine authentic connections.&nbsp;
In this interview, you'll learn:
How to Date Without the Negativity
How to Be the Best Version of Yourself on a Date
How to Turn Confusion Into Clear Boundaries
How to Avoid Self-Sabotaging in Relationships
How to Stay Grounded Amid Social Media Comparisons
How to Build Confidence by Building a Full Life Outside Dating
The most powerful shift you can make is choosing to approach love with openness, positivity, and confidence in your own worth. When you lead with curiosity instead of fear, with joy instead of judgment, you not only create better connections, but you also become more grounded in who you are.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe <a href="https://news.jayshetty.me/subscribe">here</a>.&nbsp;
What We Discuss:
00:00 Intro
03:36 Negativity Doesn't Make You a Better Dater&nbsp;
07:55 Dating Burnout&nbsp;
14:27 You Shouldn&rsquo;t Just Rely on Dating Apps!
18:06 The Checklist for Dating
22:34 Staying Single in Your 40s
23:59 The #1 Reason Why Men Go on Dates
27:05 Attitude Is Everything
29:45 What is The Best Relationship Advice?
21:18 How to Be the Best Version of Yourself
35:19 Don't Fall for Social Media Relationships
36:01 Using ChatpGPT to Create Messages
39:00 Why Small Talks Matter
42:06 Do Men Actually Have More Dating Options?
44:51 The One That Got Away
47:42 Are Men and Women Different in Long-Term Relationships?
50:15 Difficult Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have&nbsp;
52:20 The Fear Most Men Have When Dating
57:28 What Makes a Successful Marriage?&nbsp;
01:03:27 Marriage is Choosing Your Partner Every Day&nbsp;
01:05:30 Jared and Jordana on Final Five&nbsp;&nbsp;
Episode Resources:
U Up? | <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@uuppodcast">YouTube</a>
U Up? | <a href="https://www.instagram.com/u.up.podcast/">Instagram</a>
U Up? | <a href="https://x.com/uuppodcast">X</a>
U Up? | <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@uuppodcast">TikTok</a>

I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace.

I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!

I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace.
I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

My name is Jay Shetty, and my purpose is to make wisdom go viral. I’m fortunate to have fascinating conversations with the most insightful people in the world, and on my podcast, I’m sharing those conversations with you. New episodes Mondays and Fridays. Please rate and review the podcast if you enjoy it. Live life today ON PURPOSE.

My name is Jay Shetty, and my purpose is to make wisdom go viral. I’m fortunate to have fascinating conversations with the most insightful people in the world, and on my podcast, I’m sharing those conversations with you. New episodes Mondays and Fridays. Please rate and review the podcast if you enjoy it. Live life today ON PURPOSE.

Jared Freid & Jordana Abraham: Dating App Burnout? Do THIS 30-Day Challenge to Stop Wasting Time and FINALLY Meet the Right Person

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/e73c998e-6e60-432f-8610-ae210140c5b1/clips/71fb06ae-1e73-4e9c-bfed-b34d0057e382/transcript

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