Today, I will be sharing with you seven questions you can ask yourself before the year ends to help you get a clear insight of how this year went, the ups and downs, the special moments, and the things you might want to do away or restart next year. These reflections will help you realize what you may want to do differently this new year.
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They realized for every month, or every day or every week that you're apart, it takes that same amount of time to recreate that intimacy. So as much as we hope that phones and messages and zooms and facetimes can keep the communication, it can keep the connection. Obviously there's love, but the intimacy has to be reinvested. Imagine if you did not tend to a garden for six months, it would be messy, it would be wild, and then you'd have to reinvest. Hey, everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every one of you that come back every week to listen, learn, and grow. It's coming to my favorite time of the year. I mean it already is. I love the holiday season. I love the festive spirit, and I love the gifts. I love the energy, I love the celebration. But what I also love is how there's this natural inclination to want to reflect. And if you're listening to this episode right now, it's because you know that introspection and reflection are powerful for setting us up. I think a lot of us want to rest, which is natural. A lot of us want to let go, which is natural. A lot of us just want to move on too, and that's all good and well, but I think the benefits of reflection are often underrated and they're often forgotten because as a society, we choose to just rush to the next thing. We choose to just move on as quickly as possible to the next thing and distract ourselves. And taking a moment towards the end of the year to sit with yourself, to journal, to ask yourself questions can be so powerful. And I'm going to share with you the seven questions that I'm asking myself this year, and I change these every year because I discover new questions. I'm going to share with you questions that are superpowerful, insightful, some of them are really find some of them are easy, some of them are really going to surprise you, and some of them are going to be ones that remind you of the journey you've been on. And I read this amazing study that talked about how reflection is a really vital tool for growth and personal development. We think it's always learning something new, building something new, starting a new habit, while all of that comes from reflecting and making sure that our reflection shows us what we truly want to embody, embrace and build in our lives. And so I am so glad that you chose on purpose today. Thank you so much for showing up to this episode. And I want to dive straight in to these seven questions. So the first question is one that I think you'll expect, but I do want you to think about it. What is a challenge that you've overcome this year? What was something really difficult that you did? What was something that you broke through. Maybe there was a fear, Maybe there was something that you hadn't done for a long time. Maybe there was something that was holding you back. Maybe there was something that you just didn't feel you had what it takes, but you did it. What was that? And it doesn't have to be big. I think we think about doing hard things or something huge. Sometimes it could be having a difficult conversation with the family member. Sometimes it was disconnecting with a friend or reconnecting with a friend. Right, What was a challenge that you overcame this year? Personally? I know for me it was my health journey. I had double hernia surgery, which was a big part of a challenge that I overcame this year of having to go through that. Another challenge I overcame this year, which really really had a big impact on me was taking charge of some things that I was hoping other people would take care of right a challenge in my mindset that I felt I didn't have enough time that someone else could do it, that I didn't think I had to do it, and I realized that taking charge of that felt so good. That was a challenge for me to find the time to find the energy to take care of it when I'd hoped that I could outsource it or that someone else could take care of it for me. Another challenge that I overcame this year, and I'm sharing these because I want you to see the difference in scale the different types of challenges that exist. I think a big challenge for me that I overcame this year is that I realized that I could take control back of my schedule, that I didn't have to be subservient or inferior to my schedule. I didn't have to live a life of pure product productivity and efficiency if I wanted to take a break, and allowing myself that that was a challenge. Not is how challenges are not always something obvious, and I know that you've broke through and made a difference and done hard things. I know that, and I don't want you to underestimate it. And I think one of the biggest challenges is that we don't really fully allow ourselves to recognize. We kind of move on and we're like, oh, that's normal, like oh that's okay, or we're carrying it so heavily on our backs. And so I really want you to think about that, journal about that, And the question you want to ask is a follow up to that. The challenge you overcame this year is what did it teach you? What did you learn from it? What did you take away from it? And for me, when I think about the challenge of taking control over my schedule again, I realized that what I learned was what do I want to do with my time? How do I want to live my life? How do I want to breathe? We all have a limited number of breaths on this we all have a limited number of steps on this earth. I want my breaths and steps to be used to serve and create an impact and make a positive difference for myself and for others. And if I'm not feeling that my schedule is supporting that, then how am I allowing days, months, weeks, years to just go by? The second question I want you to ask yourself, is a surprise you dealt with something you weren't expecting that you had to pivot? For? The reason I'm asking you to reflect on these is that studies show that reflecting on how you've overcome past challenges helps you to better process negative experiences in the future. People have the ability to use these moments as a source of creativity and motivation. So we think we're bad at dealing with difficulties because we've never noticed how well we've dealt with him in the past. If we've never sat down to reflect on how did I deal with a bad thing last year, we don't know how to deal with a bad thing next year. So what was a surprise you dealt with? My hernia surgery was definitely a surprise. Getting COVID for me was a surprise for the first time in three years, and that was a surprise. I think that pivoting to the new demands, I realized that at the beginning of the year, I thought I had a plan, and then I realized I'd overcommitted in certain areas. That was a surprise that I dealt with. And so I dealt with a surprise that me and Radi were distant for such a long time this year because of her work, my work, because of visa things and issues and challenges and everything else. Like, we literally couldn't see each other for nearly six months this year, and that was a big surprise. We didn't plan for that, We didn't know that was going to happen. We didn't have the foresight or the communication to know how to deal with that. And so the way I dealt with that was really interesting that I realized, especially when it comes to relationship surprise that I realized, for every month or every day or every week that you're apart, it takes that same amount of time to recreate that intimacy. So as much as we hope that phones and messages and zooms and face times can keep that, it can keep the communication, it can keep the connection. Obviously there's love, but the intimacy has to be reinvested, it has to be rebuilt. Imagine if you did not tend to a garden for six months, it would be messy, it would be wild, and then you'd have to reinvest, and so, of course, Rather and I have been together now for nearly ten years, married for six, and it was just so beautiful to fall in love again and again, like to go through that process of reconnecting, deepening our intimacy, rediscovering each other. And to me, that was a surprise that I dealt with this year, and I'm sharing mine with you because I want to be honorable with you. I feel like you know me, you listen to me, You're you know I'm in your head, and you're in my heart and life. And I feel like I can open up here. Even though it's just me and a microphone. It isn't. It's me and you and your dog on a walk, it's me you and your partner. It's me and you in a car, it's me and you at the gym, wherever you are right now. I want to be open with you because I want you to be vulnerable with yourself. The third question that I want you to answer is something you bought this year, A tangible thing that you bought this year that you love, an investment that was amazing, like a really good investment of money. Something you bought this year and you're like, I am so happy that I put money into that. Right for me, it's probably I'm gonna probably use tech. It's probably my iMac and my iPad. They've been great investments. I travel a lot, so my iPad's amazing when I'm traveling. The IMAX great on my desk. I feel like it's made my time at my desk more productive. It's made it more fulfilling. I was tired of staring at a tiny screen all day, and I feel like having that biggest screen is really helpful. I felt when I was traveling that I wasn't really as productive. I wasn't being able to also entertain myself while I was moving around and traveling. So I just want you to know that you bought something this year. It could have been a course. It could have been a program. It could have been a certification. It could have been a workout, it could have been a therapy session. Right, what did you buy this year? It could even be a coat? Right, you love this coat that you bought, or you love this T shirt that you bought, this vacation that you bought. What did you spend money on? They're really proud of yourself? Or that you're really happy with yourself, because I think often we spend money and we get really hard on ourselves when it feels like it was wasting money. But when we actually invest money or it grows or it compounds, we don't always feel that way, right. It's interesting how hard we can be around ourselves. Oh, I shouldn't have bought that. Oh I wish it didn't waste money on that. Oh, that's been a waste of time. And what's something you bought this year that you think that was great? Another investment I made this year, and I hope you've been appreciating if you've been watching the guest episodes on YouTube, was my studio. I invested a lot into building this beautiful studio space in my home that you can see on our YouTube channel with all the guests that we've interviewed. That was something I was really proud that we invested in because I really want you to have an amazing viewing experience. I want my guest to have an amazing, intimate conversation experience. So let's celebrate our expenditures too. I think spending money is something we're always so harsh on ourselves for. What's something you bought that really truly made a difference this year and really feels like it was the right thing to do. Question number four, what's the best book or podcast you listen to this year? What was that episode? What was that page? What was that book? I think for me, definitely it was Doctor Gabel Mattes The Myth of Normal was definitely my favorite book of the year that I read. And I think my favorite podcast interview is a really really tough one, but I would definitely say that the Kendall Jenner episode was really special. I saw the love and support that came through with that episode and how powerful it was. Great conversation. Having doctor Daniel Ahman on the podcast is always a huge treat. That was a real, real awesome episode as always. And Sean Stevenson on the podcast was an incredible conversation about health and well being, so and diet and gut. I think we've had so many awesome The Tony Robbins episode this year, it was a phenomenal episode. I can't believe it was this year. It feels so long ago. And I just want you to reflect on what was the best book, what was that best podcast? Share it with a friend? Pass it on. Right, there's someone in the world who needs to listen to that. Read here that share it with them, pass it on to them, and it will read convince you, rededicate you to your personal growth journey. Now five, this is an interesting question, and the question is what are your blind spots for next year? Right? What are your blind spots for next year? What is something that you're unaware of that you could become more aware of. I think you know my blind spots going on tour. I've never been on tour before, so I'm excited for that experience. You know, my blind spot is we're going into a recession and you don't know how that's going to impact things, And so I want to be there for all of you, and I hope that you'll take solace. I'm being confident that I'm going to be providing guidance and steer on this show to help you deal with the challenges that come next year. And so knowing your blind spots actually helps you prepare rather than avoiding them hoping you don't have to see them, hoping that you don't have to deal with them, will actually take care of them, which which doesn't It makes us weaker. It doesn't make us feel as powerful as we think it would. So knowing your blind spots can make a huge, huge difference. Number six, What made me happiest this year? I think what made me happy is this year were the surprises. To officiate an incredible wedding. I got to visit the gorillas and trek with them in Rwanda, got to reconnect deeply with Rather. I've got to finish writing my book. I mean, there are so many things that made me happy. I have the best team. I absolutely love my team. I have this amazing group of really talented, capable individuals who are so collaborative and so powerful, and I'm so proud of them. And it's really special to just take a moment to say what made me happiest this year? And I promise you that you have at happy moments. You have at beautiful moments, even if you feel that you haven't. The mind's good at remembering the tough times and the difficult times, and good at forgetting the beauty and the joy. And when we actively seek out those moments and celebrate them and relive them in our mind, they become etched, They become imprinted on our hearts and they become stronger and more powerful as points of inspiration in our life. I think that the happiest moments are the ones that keep you going. I had this incredible experience I was the last twenty four hours. I was at an event, and loads of people came up to me and talk to me about how calm and my daily meditations or on purpose has changed their life. And it wasn't just a statement. It was people who'd lost family members in dealing with grief. It was people who'd lost friends who'd committed suicide. It was people who'd been through some of the most difficult things in the world, family members going through cancer themselves like I was. I said this to them. I said that you feel me like you're saying that my work inspires you. But actually, if I'm completely honest, your story inspires me to keep going and keep giving. Your story you listening right now, Your story inspires me to keep going and keep giving. Your story needs to be shared. Your voice needs to be heard, shared that message because it will help someone else. The seventh question that I want you to reflect on for twenty twenty two is a person you couldn't have got through this year without who's that person, Who's that person that you're so grateful to have had in your life this year that without them it wouldn't have been the same. And guess what, you know what, probably that person doesn't even know it because they just love you and they would never even remind you of that. They won't even say that to you. Who is that for you? Who is that for you that you know in your life made such a huge difference. I'd have to say it was definitely my monk teacher who came and lived with us a couple of times this year. It was really beautiful for me and rather to have that opportunity, definitely spending time with my good friend Sean. We had the best reflections and really amazing conversations this year. It was a special year for both of us. I think that another person that couldn't have got through without of course, rather, I mean, you know, rather, these are like my heartbeat. You know, she's so important to me in so many ways, so tolerant, so understanding, so patient, but so deeply knows me and knows my heart. And we put on a beautiful meditation experience together this year for our friends, and that was one of my best memories of this year. Another person that I couldn't have got through without this year was my best man, my best friend of the last seventeen years, who's back in London, but we somehow fine time to talk every single week, stay connected. I mean, I could go on and on and on, but it's really special to sit there and go those people that love me so deeply, that they love me so deeply that they dissolve. I'm just so used to being loved by them that I don't even remember or notice it often. I hope these questions really help you. I hope they help you reflect on the year behind. It's easy to be like, what was the worst thing? What was the best thing? And that doesn't necessarily give us excitement, hope, energy, momentum. These questions are designed. When you ask yourself what's a challenge you overcame this year? You get strength to overcome future challenges. There will be challenges in twenty twenty three, but you'll be prepared with the lessons from twenty twenty two. When you ask yourself a question of what's the surprise I dealt with, you'll be better at dealing with surprises next year. You can't plan for everything, and you can't worry about everything either. Right, you can't have a plan for everything and you can't worry about everything. The third question, something you bought this year that you love that will remind you to invest your money wisely. Right, you can try and set as many habits as you want to spend your money wisely to do the right thing. I promise you just that question will say, Oh, that's what I should spend more money on. That's what I should focus on, because that actually made me happy. The fourth question, what's the best book or podcast you read that's going to inspire you to recommit to your personal growth journey. Knowing your blind spots is a great reflection question because it gives you awareness, gives you greater perspective. You get this bird's eye view. If you imagine life is like walking through a maze. If you've ever been amazed. You're lost, You're trying to go and every corner looks the same and every turn looks the same. Imagine if you had a friend, or imagine if you could climb a tower and stand on top of that tower and look down. You get a bird's eye view. That's what happens when you ask yourself, what are your blind spots? The sixth question, when you ask yourself what made you happy is this year? That reminds you to keep repeating those things and keep prioritizing those things, because we know those distractions always creep in. And when you ask yourself, what's a person you can have gone through this year without? You're gonna call them straight after this. You're gonna messes them straight after this. You share this episode with them because it made you think of them, and you're going to tell them how much they mean to you and how much you love them. I'm so grateful that you are here. I'm so grateful that you shared this podcast. I'm so grateful that so many of you are coming to see me on tour Jayshty tour dot com. If you don't have the tickets already, come and see me live. I'm traveling all over the world, honestly, just because I want to hold your hands, I want to look into your eyes, I want to give you a big hug. I can't wait to see you. I hope you have an amazing holiday season. Thank you for joining me today, and I'll be back again next week with another special episode. Of course, if you're new to the podcast, you've got loads to listen to. Makes you go back and listen to some of my highlights this year. We've got Selena Gomez, Dr Gabele Matte, Alex Cooper, Tony Robbins, Trevor Noah, Meghan Trainer, great episode, Lily Reinhart, Vanessa Hudgens, Andrew Hooberman, doctor Daniel and I think I said though already amazing list of guests this year, so many more Big Sean amazing, amazing episode. Make sure you go back and dive in. Thank you so much. I love you and I appreciate you