Adam Lane Smith on Attachment Styles

Ben asks advice on how to avoid things blowing

Gene's wife ignores him and also he's an avoid

Mary's husband is distant and wants a divorce 

Adam Lane Smith joins Doug as they talk about exploring how to form secure attachment bonds with your spouse, children and friends. 


Ben--My biggest challenge is coming to my wife and she turns things on me. I don't want things to blow up but they always do.  How do I prevent that?  (26:09)

Gene-My wife ignores me and I'm avoidant because it always leads to an argument. (30:06)

Mary-My husband has become very distant in the last couple years. Last night he said we don't want to married anymore. (38:51)

Adam Lane Smith joins Doug as they talk about exploring how to form secure attachment bonds with your spouse, children and friends.&nbsp;
 Ben--My biggest challenge is coming to my wife and she turns things on me. I don't want things to blow up but they always do.&nbsp; How do I prevent that?&nbsp; (26:09)
Gene-My wife ignores me and I'm avoidant because it always leads to an argument. (30:06)
Mary-My husband has become very distant in the last couple years. Last night he said we don't want to married anymore. (38:51)

Marriage Unhindered is a sincere exploration of the joys and challenges within the realm of marriage. Hosted by the seasoned Doug Hinderer, this one-hour, caller-based show is scheduled to air Monday through Friday at 5PM CT, and will offer listeners an authentic journey into the complexities of marital relationships.

Marriage Unhindered is a sincere exploration of the joys and challenges within the realm of marriage. Hosted by the seasoned Doug Hinderer, this one-hour, caller-based show is scheduled to air Monday through Friday at 5PM CT, and will offer listeners an authentic journey into the complexities of marital relationships.

Marriage Unhindered

Attachment Styles 

Son married outside Church and coming home w/f

How to live with an alcoholic spouse

Susan asks about non-practicing Catholic Coupl

Catherine asks if it was okay she didn't go to

How does one's relationship w/earthly father r

Kate shares story of going to non-Catholic wed

Should we break the family up if our child is 

Doug answers numerous questions from emailers ranging from non practicing son coming home with his family; how to live with an alcoholic spouse and fatherly relationship compared to God the father relationship

3:45-How to handle a son who got married outside the Church and wants to bring his family home for a visit

12:14-How to live with an alcoholic spouse 

24:44 Susan-I have a friend who was married in city hall. She and her spouse are Catholic. Do they have the same obligation to stay in that marriage as Catholics who marry in the Church?

28:20 Catherine -Our son was married outside the church and we didn't attend his wedding. He left the faith. Was it wrong for us not to go?


39:07-How does one's relationship with her earthly father affect how she views God the father.  

44:41- Kate-Our son married outside the Church 17 years ago. We did attend the wedding and embraced her. 6 years into the marriage she converted and became devout.

47:23-Should we break the family up if our child is not practicing the faith and wants to get married outside the Church?

Doug answers numerous questions from emailers ranging from non practicing son coming home with his family;&nbsp;how to live with an alcoholic spouse and fatherly relationship compared to God the father relationship
3:45-How to handle a son who got married outside the Church and wants to bring his family home for a visit
12:14-How to live with an alcoholic spouse&nbsp;
24:44 Susan-I have a friend who was married in city hall. She and her spouse are Catholic. Do they have the same obligation to stay in that marriage as Catholics who marry in the Church?
28:20 Catherine -Our son was married outside the church and we didn't attend his wedding. He left the faith. Was it wrong for us not to go? 
39:07-How does one's relationship with her earthly father affect how she views God the father.&nbsp;&nbsp;
44:41- Kate-Our son married outside the Church 17 years ago. We did attend the wedding and embraced her. 6 years into the marriage she converted and became devout.
47:23-Should we break the family up if our child is not practicing the faith and wants to get married outside the Church?

How to deal with non-practicing children and other topics  

Holiday arguments: a review

Dating a single dad

Break 1

Family Boundaries 

Break 2

Messages on husband's devices

Bless the efforts not just success

What do you do when your future father-in-law is getting in between you and your fiancé? Should you talk to your daughter about concerns you have with her 11-year-old? Should you be concerned that your daughter is dating a single dad? Doug goes to the mail bag.

 

Listener questions and comments:
Brenda - I am a single mother and I think that it takes a lot of discernment. It’s hard because my son’s feelings matter as well if he gets attached to a guy and I break up. (19:56)

 

Resources:

Prior Propper Planning is Critical

https://relevantradio.com/2026/07/prior-propper-planning-is-critical/

What do you do when your future father-in-law is getting in between you and your fianc&eacute;? Should you talk to your daughter about concerns you have with her 11-year-old? Should you be concerned that your daughter is dating a single dad? Doug goes to the mail bag.
&nbsp;
Listener questions and comments:
<ul>
<li>Brenda - I am a single mother and I think that it takes a lot of discernment. It&rsquo;s hard because my son&rsquo;s feelings matter as well if he gets attached to a guy and I break up. (19:56)</li>
</ul>
&nbsp;
Resources:
Prior Propper Planning is Critical
<a href="https://relevantradio.com/2026/07/prior-propper-planning-is-critical/">https://relevantradio.com/2026/07/prior-propper-planning-is-critical/</a>

Relationships Parenting & Perspective

Avoiding arguments over the holidays

Adult children living at home

My son-in-law drinks too much

Doug shares tips for surviving the 4th of July picnic with family while avoiding arguments.

 

Listener questions and comments:
Doug - At the family functions there is an emphasis on the drinking during the 4th. I can’t drink because my dad is an alcoholic so I want to know what I should do. (29:27)
Jane - My son in law's father died from alcohol and I find that he drinks too much. What should I do? Should I say something? (38:42)
Julie - For the 4th I always use leading questions like you do in the beginning of your show that are not threatening at the dinner table. (44:23)
Judy - My husband was an alcoholic and I want to say having beer and wine around isn’t the solution if the problem is hard stuff. But prayer is the best thing to do. (46:16)

 

Resources:

Reasons we argue at family gatherings
Family knows where the hot buttons are
We tend to regress when we are around family
Holidays are loaded with expectations
The weather adds fuel to the fire

 

8 tips to avoid unnecessary arguments
Decide before you arrive, what person you want to be
Know your triggers – What topics usually get you hooked?
Stop trying to change people at the picnic table
Use some short boundary statements
Lower the temperature instead of raising it
Change the topic
Change the setting
Come up with a code word for you and your spouse to use

Doug shares tips for surviving the 4th&nbsp;of July picnic with family while avoiding arguments.
&nbsp;
Listener questions and comments:
<ul>
<li>Doug - At the family functions there is an emphasis on the drinking during the 4th. I can&rsquo;t drink because my dad is an alcoholic so I want to know what I should do. (29:27)</li>
<li>Jane - My son in law's father died from alcohol and I find that he drinks too much. What should I do? Should I say something? (38:42)</li>
<li>Julie - For the 4th I always use leading questions like you do in the beginning of your show that are not threatening at the dinner table. (44:23)</li>
<li>Judy - My husband was an alcoholic and I want to say having beer and wine around isn&rsquo;t the solution if the problem is hard stuff. But prayer is the best thing to do. (46:16)</li>
</ul>
&nbsp;
Resources:
Reasons we argue at family gatherings
<ol>
<li>Family knows where the hot buttons are</li>
<li>We tend to regress when we are around family</li>
<li>Holidays are loaded with expectations</li>
<li>The weather adds fuel to the fire</li>
</ol>
&nbsp;
8 tips to avoid unnecessary arguments
<ol>
<li>Decide before you arrive, what person you want to be</li>
<li>Know your triggers &ndash; What topics usually get you hooked?</li>
<li>Stop trying to change people at the picnic table</li>
<li>Use some short boundary statements</li>
<li>Lower the temperature instead of raising it</li>
<li>Change the topic</li>
<li>Change the setting</li>
<li>Come up with a code word for you and your spouse to use</li>
</ol>

Attachment Styles

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