If you’ve been trying to quit drinking, hide your struggles, or heal on your own, this conversation will meet you right where you are. In this episode, Christy sits down with Toni Collier to talk about shame, vulnerability, and why true healing happens in safe, honest community—not isolation.

In this deeply honest and Spirit-led conversation, Toni shares her story of betrayal, trauma, and rebuilding her life through radical honesty and connection. From being the “strong one” to finally admitting she couldn’t do it alone, this episode is a powerful reminder that freedom isn’t found in hiding—it’s found in being seen.

Together, they unpack why so many women stay stuck in cycles of shame (including alcohol use), how the enemy uses isolation to keep us trapped, and what it actually looks like to step into healing with God and other people.

If you’ve ever felt like you should be able to “fix this on your own”… babe, this episode will shift something deep.

💭 If you’ve ever thought…

“I should be able to handle this myself.”
“I don’t want anyone to know how bad it really is.”
“I feel ashamed of my drinking (or coping habits).”
“I’ve been hurt by people… I don’t trust community.”

Babe, this episode is for you 🩷

• What You’ll Learn In This Episode

• Why shame thrives in isolation and loses power when it’s brought into the light

• The difference between trying to heal alone vs. healing in safe, trusted community

• How Toni’s story of betrayal and trauma revealed her need for people—not just strength

• Why being the “strong one” can actually keep you stuck longer

• How alcohol and other coping mechanisms can quietly become a response to pain and stress

• Why moderation can become a trap and what real freedom can look like instead

• The importance of confessional community and being known without judgment

• How to find safe people and build community—even if you’ve been hurt before

• Why healing happens in circles, not rows (and how to stop just consuming and start connecting)

• A practical, honest look at what it takes to stop hiding and start healing

Links & Resources

Toni’s Book: Don’t Try This Alone

Toni's Website 

Follow Toni:

Instagram

YouTube

Join the Love Life Sober Community
https://lovelifesober.co.uk/community

Join the 40-Day Alcohol Fast
https://lovelifesober.co.uk/the-fast

Order Christy’s book, Love Life Sober: A 40 Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind
https://lovelifesober.co.uk/book

Connect on Instagram: @lovelifesoberwithchristy
Subscribe on YouTube — Come hang with us!

⚠️ Disclaimer

The creators, hosts, and producers of the Love Life Sober podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, psychological, or professional advice nor intend for the podcast or any Love Life Sober communication to substitute for such. Views and opinions expressed in any referenced or linked resources do not necessarily reflect those of the Love Life Sober team or guests.

If you&rsquo;ve been trying to quit drinking, hide your struggles, or heal on your own, this conversation will meet you right where you are. In this episode, Christy sits down with Toni Collier to talk about shame, vulnerability, and why true healing happens in safe, honest community&mdash;not isolation.
In this deeply honest and Spirit-led conversation, Toni shares her story of betrayal, trauma, and rebuilding her life through radical honesty and connection. From being the &ldquo;strong one&rdquo; to finally admitting she couldn&rsquo;t do it alone, this episode is a powerful reminder that freedom isn&rsquo;t found in hiding&mdash;it&rsquo;s found in being seen.
Together, they unpack why so many women stay stuck in cycles of shame (including alcohol use), how the enemy uses isolation to keep us trapped, and what it actually looks like to step into healing with God and other people.
If you&rsquo;ve ever felt like you should be able to &ldquo;fix this on your own&rdquo;&hellip; babe, this episode will shift something deep.
<hr data-start="1258" data-end="1261">
💭 If you&rsquo;ve ever thought&hellip;
&ldquo;I should be able to handle this myself.&rdquo; &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t want anyone to know how bad it really is.&rdquo; &ldquo;I feel ashamed of my drinking (or coping habits).&rdquo; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been hurt by people&hellip; I don&rsquo;t trust community.&rdquo;
Babe, this episode is for you 🩷
<hr data-start="1536" data-end="1539">
&bull; What You&rsquo;ll Learn In This Episode
&bull; Why&nbsp;shame thrives in isolation and loses power when it&rsquo;s brought into the light
&bull; The difference between trying to heal alone vs. healing in&nbsp;safe, trusted community
&bull; How Toni&rsquo;s story of betrayal and trauma revealed her need for people&mdash;not just strength
&bull; Why being the &ldquo;strong one&rdquo; can actually keep you stuck longer
&bull; How alcohol and other coping mechanisms can quietly become a response to pain and stress
&bull; Why&nbsp;moderation can become a trap and what real freedom can look like instead
&bull; The importance of&nbsp;confessional community and being known without judgment
&bull; How to find safe people and build community&mdash;even if you&rsquo;ve been hurt before
&bull; Why healing happens in&nbsp;circles, not rows (and how to stop just consuming and start connecting)
&bull; A practical, honest look at what it takes to stop hiding and start healing
<hr data-start="2783" data-end="2786">
Links &amp; Resources
<a href="https://www.tonijcollier.com/notalone">Toni&rsquo;s Book: Don&rsquo;t Try This Alone</a>
<a href="https://www.tonijcollier.com">Toni's Website </a>
Follow Toni:
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier/">Instagram</a>
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/@UCaMPFRIXgNF-FtK4ut4xaVQ">YouTube</a>
Join the Love Life Sober Community <a href="https://lovelifesober.co.uk/community" data-start="2894" data-end="2931">https://lovelifesober.co.uk/community</a>
Join the 40-Day Alcohol Fast <a href="https://lovelifesober.co.uk/the-fast" data-start="2969" data-end="3005">https://lovelifesober.co.uk/the-fast</a>
Order Christy&rsquo;s book, Love Life Sober: A 40 Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind <a href="https://lovelifesober.co.uk/book" data-start="3142" data-end="3174">https://lovelifesober.co.uk/book</a>
Connect on Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/lovelifesoberwithchristy/">@lovelifesoberwithchristy</a> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@LoveLifeSober">Subscribe on YouTube</a> &mdash; Come hang with us!
<hr data-start="3284" data-end="3287">
⚠️ Disclaimer
The creators, hosts, and producers of the Love Life Sober podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, psychological, or professional advice nor intend for the podcast or any Love Life Sober communication to substitute for such. Views and opinions expressed in any referenced or linked resources do not necessarily reflect those of the Love Life Sober team or guests.

Love Life Sober is a Christian podcast for women questioning their relationship with alcohol and sensing God might have more for them beyond the wine glass.

Have you felt that nudge from God to put down the wine glass, but the thought of relaxing, having fun, or even coping with life feels impossible without it? Are you waking up each morning vowing not to drink tonight, only to find that by five p.m., all bets are off?

Love Life Sober is for sober and sober-curious women who love Jesus, or who are longing to reconnect with Him, and who know deep down that alcohol is no longer serving them.

Hosted by Christian sobriety coach and author Christy Osborne, author of Love Life Sober: A 40 Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind, this podcast blends Scripture, neuroscience, and practical coaching to help you understand what’s happening in your brain, your nervous system, and your heart, and how lasting freedom from alcohol is actually possible.

You’ll hear expert conversations and powerful testimonies for women exploring Christian sobriety, faith-based recovery, mindful drinking, and alcohol-free living. Each episode gently invites you to step away from wine and toward deeper connection with God, without shame, pressure, or the need to decide forever.

At the heart of Love Life Sober is a simple truth. Love, joy, peace, and connection were never meant to be found in a wine bottle. They are found in Jesus.

This is a grace-filled, shame-free space for women seeking freedom from alcohol through faith, neuroscience, and compassionate coaching. You don’t have to hit rock bottom. You don’t have to white-knuckle your way through sobriety. And you don’t have to do this alone.

If you’re ready to loosen alcohol’s grip and live the life God is inviting you into, you’re in the right place.
Welcome to Love Life Sober. Want more? Visit lovelifesober.com. 

Love Life Sober is a Christian podcast for women questioning their relationship with alcohol and sensing God might have more for them beyond the wine glass.
Have you felt that nudge from God to put down the wine glass, but the thought of relaxing, having fun, or even coping with life feels impossible without it? Are you waking up each morning vowing not to drink tonight, only to find that by five p.m., all bets are off?
Love Life Sober is for sober and sober-curious women who love Jesus, or who are longing to reconnect with Him, and who know deep down that alcohol is no longer serving them.
Hosted by Christian sobriety coach and author Christy Osborne, author of <a href="https://lovelifesober.co.uk/book">Love Life Sober: A 40 Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind</a>, this podcast blends Scripture, neuroscience, and practical coaching to help you understand what&rsquo;s happening in your brain, your nervous system, and your heart, and how lasting freedom from alcohol is actually possible.
You&rsquo;ll hear expert conversations and powerful testimonies for women exploring Christian sobriety, faith-based recovery, mindful drinking, and alcohol-free living. Each episode gently invites you to step away from wine and toward deeper connection with God, without shame, pressure, or the need to decide forever.
At the heart of Love Life Sober is a simple truth. Love, joy, peace, and connection were never meant to be found in a wine bottle. They are found in Jesus.
This is a grace-filled, shame-free space for women seeking freedom from alcohol through faith, neuroscience, and compassionate coaching. You don&rsquo;t have to hit rock bottom. You don&rsquo;t have to white-knuckle your way through sobriety. And you don&rsquo;t have to do this alone.
If you&rsquo;re ready to loosen alcohol&rsquo;s grip and live the life God is inviting you into, you&rsquo;re in the right place. Welcome to Love Life Sober. Want more? Visit <a href="https://lovelifesober.com/">lovelifesober.com</a>.&nbsp;

Love Life Sober is a Christian podcast for women questioning their relationship with alcohol and sensing God might have more for them beyond the wine glass.  Have you felt that nudge from God to put down the wine glass, but the thought of relaxing, having fun, or even coping with life feels impossible without it? Are you waking up each morning vowing not to drink tonight, only to find that by five p.m., all bets are off?  Love Life Sober is for sober and sober-curious women who love Jesus, or who are longing to reconnect with Him, and who know deep down that alcohol is no longer serving them.

Love Life Sober

Don’t Try This Alone: Finding Your Real Community | Toni Collier

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/9fd58df9-7931-47a9-b498-b41c0176037e/transcript