Life UncutToday we talk Bach chat and Gwyneth Paltrow's questionable new fad. We ask “How many is too many” when dating and searching for love. Is it ok to date multiple people at once? For how long? Are there rules? No really, asking for a friend. We will also be answering your questions on ASK UNCUT Todayʼs episode is brought to you by our sponsor Tribe Skincare - 100% natural skincare for sensitive skin. Use the code 'UNCUT' for 10% off their entire range https://tribeskincare.com.au
Today's episode of Life Uncut is brought to you by Tribe Skincare, one natural skincare for sensitive skin to reduce redness, breakouts, exma and dry patches. Tribe Skincare offer free express shipping in Australia and you can head to the link in our show notes to use the code uncut for ten percent off their entire range of skincare and mineral makeup.
Guys, welcome to Life Uncut. We are your hosts Britt and Laura. Hey guys, and today we're going to be jumping straight back into some batch chat because is it just me? Or is this getting frisky?
No, it is not just you. It's very sexy.
Yeah, I actually knew it wasn't it was a rhetorical question. But thanks.
Oh sorry, sir, I thought I'm really tired.
We're also going to be talking about something a little bit more serious, and that is dating multi people at once. Is it okay? When is it okay?
For?
How long is it okay?
And are there any rules? Because I don't know. I also don't know. Was that also a rhetorical question or did you want me to give my opinion?
Then I do want your opinion, but not quite yet. All right, high wait, calm your farm. But thank you for coming back. This is going to be an interesting one today. Before we do get into the Bachelora, I need to get something off my chest. What have you done or I haven't done anything? Thanks very much for the support. But I did read something this week that has left me a little on edge, a little unnerved. Maybe. Oh, I don't know if I've been living under a rock.
Is that that Miley Cyrus and Linn Hemsworth has split up. Liam Hemsworth his name is really hard to say when you haven't slept for eight weeks.
Look, that's not what it is. But while we're talking about that, I just want to note that if he is really single, well so mine. I'm just gonna throw that out to.
The Oh wow, that was thirsty, but I like it.
Well, you know, you've got to risk it for the biscuit. That's my saying. No, but back to what I.
Pleased, don't risk our podcast for your biscuit.
If it gets me Liam Hemsworth, then yeah. So look, I read this thing about Gwyneth Paltrow, and anytime I read something about Gwyneth Paltrow, it is always controversial.
Yes, I agree. Okay, so what has she done? What crazy whack shit has she done?
Do you or anyone you know steam your vagina? Please tell me?
And this, well, it's actually a funny story. Just the other day, no, I don't. I did see that Chrissy Tagan was talking about that on her Instagram though recently as well.
Okay, so I have since doled into this a little bit, and I have found out that Chrissy Tagan did it because of Gwyneth Paltrow. Right, But I don't get it, and I have never heard it before. But do you know what it is? Because I'm going to tell you.
Look, I have too many things to think about it at the moment already. I have to think about my pelvic floor muscles. Why am I going to start thinking about steaming it.
That's one of the reasons people think, oh this hell.
It sounds very hot and probably not somewhere where I want to get very.
Yes, don't picture yourself like relax with your feet up in an infrared sauna sort of thing, because it is not like that.
So what is it? Describe this to me?
Okay, so literally, it's like your potty training, That's what The image reminded me of they're squatting over some sort of bowl and it's filled with boiling water and they infuse it with all these herbs basil, rosemary, wormwood.
You really did do your research into that.
Yeah, and there's this one called this is my favorite herb for vaginal steaming. It's called the mugwort. Oh, I'm not fortunate they infuse this water with these ridiculous herbs. They squat over it and they steam their vagina. Okay, but what is meant to be the purpose of steaming? Like, what benefits am I going to get from getting it all hot and heavy downe there? Okay? So yeah, they say that it cleanses, and they say it can help titan if you're if you've had children. They say it helps me the pro lapse as well. But I did look a little bit further into this, and the Guyan No Society has said that there is no benefit to this, and in fact, it actually comes with a risk.
No, of course, and that's because it's come from ridiculous Goop was trying to tell us at one point to spend fifteen thousand dollars on a dildo. Do you not remember this. Oh my god, I don't remember. It's like an eighteen carrot gold. Oh I love that I remember this an eighteen carrot gold. I wish I had fifteen thousand dollars to blow on a dildo. That's why you postpone the way. I definitely didn't. But yeah, look, don't spend fifteen thousand dollars on dildo. Don't steam your vagina. Thank you for coming to Life Uncut for some very important life lessons.
Well, the reason is made than using the first place is not because people are steaming. It is because one poor woman, and I'm sure there are more, she got second degree burn.
Imagine going to the hospital and being like, hey, so.
I was cleansing my vjjh.
Yeah, this is too much. We really should get into the batch chat. I can't do this anymore. Well, I just wanted to.
I just wanted to just see if anyone else knew this, anybody was the only person not doing it. I mean, do people.
Literally write their list? I don't even wash my face properly any or let alone anything else. I'm so so lazy.
You know what, You're right, It's definitely time to move on. Yeah, go batch chat, babe, did you watch it?
Yes, of course I watched it. I actually, hi, No, I went back and saw it again a second time on ten play, so I am well caught up.
So I did too, Actually, and I did it whilst I was on a treadmill, and I felt like I was just killing life. But straight up, what are your thoughts? Well, the Golden ticket, Oh yeah, Ellie cashed.
I don't know.
Did they go to Flemington or did they go to willy Wonka Land.
I'm so sorry, but Flemington Racecourse was not my idea of showing Melbourne on a date.
Wasn't what I was expecting the date to be.
What we expecting the date to be.
When I think of Melbourne, I think, I mean I always think this, but I always think about food and wine. You think food and wine, you think the alleyways, you think the trams.
I was going to say, I think everyone riding the tram for free for.
Maybe late afternoon some Kilda, I think AFL.
I just think it was such an ad channel ten put on an for a date. I don't know. It was like, why would you do the racing and the gaming and a gay waterhouse? It just made no sense to me.
Well, Yeah. So when he said he had somebody special to introduce her to, you thought it was gonna be like a friend or a family member.
Surely Channelton has some sponsorships or something through this this year. It's the only thing that makes sense, because to me, that was such a bizarre date in itself.
I agree, But what got me through it was that I love Ellie. Yeah, she's beautiful. Like I smile when I see her smile. I know, I don't know, maybe I have a little soft spot for her because I work in the hospital and she's a nurse and she works in the hospital, and I just think you probably work like a boss and you're giving back and I know the nitty gritty she would be getting down to and she's such a caring person.
Well that's exactly how she came across in the first few episodes when she was saying that she gets so much out of helping other people and that's why she does the job that she does. She is very, very lovable and she is the hero that we don't deserve.
That is damn straight. And I just think it's not going to end well.
I have this feeling I have to agree with you and the only reason why I think that is because she's getting so much awesome airtime and she's being held up to be so perfect. There's been no jeopardy in her storyline at all, and that's what makes me think maybe this is heading for disaster. But you know, yeah, also, who knows, maybe some jeopardy in her storyline is coming.
Be on its way.
What did you think of the.
Group date on that episode the AFL. Yeah, they're all running around and dropping the ball. That was such a volcano if you don't know what a lolcano is like an eruption of laughter. And I was just erupting in laughter because of Mary, because of everyone, but Mary. Mary is all of us. I said this in the last episode. She is my favorite. Everything she says is funny, even oh god, I'm getting ahead of myself, but even her trying to flirt on the next group date photo shoot, ah, she just slays me, rip absolutely slays me.
But Nicole got there.
Yeah, Nicole got the extra time.
Yeah, okay, I'm not going crazy. Yeah, And so I talked about herself for the entire date, did she She was like, I can do skateboarding, I can do rollerblading, I can do AFL. I love surfing. She just rattled off every sport that there was because she can do it and she's amazing.
I didn't I didn't notice that, to be honest, but I could have called this before the event happened. They didn't kiss. Now, our boy Matt has kissed everyone so far, but he didn't kiss Nicole.
Yeah, that's because Nicole didn't stop talking about herself long enough to actually give him a chance to get down her throat, because he's been getting down everyone else's throat.
All right, So we get back to the mansion and then Izy gives the date card. But who is is he there?
We're still so early in the season that every episode someone pops up and I'm like, who the frick is that? Where did she come from?
I legitimately didn't know who she was. I thought she might've been the waitress that just came on screen.
There's still too many girls, and unfortunately I cannot remember all of them. So I know who is he is now because she went home the next episode, But I had no idea who she was, So who went home on that episode? So that episode and I only know this, I actually didn't know who these girls were either, but it's Jesse Renee and Jesse cutt okay good at least reculling a few of them get out of here. And that was also the episode when Nicole seemed like she was super drunk at a cocktail party.
Right, yeah, I think she's going to be the drinker of the show.
I mean, not that anyone really come like it is supposed to come across as that, but you can kind of tell when you're looking at them at the Rose ceremony and they look bleary eyed.
Did you get drunk on the show? Oh?
Once or twice?
Did you only once? At the very end, when I was like, whooo, like I'm so over this and I'm ready to let it out.
I had one. It was cut out, thank god.
But I.
Had a boxy and I had a glass of wine in my hand, and I was crying and I was saying to my producer, I was like, I'm.
An independent woman and I don't need to put out with this bullshit.
Oh my god, thank god they cut the whole thing out. But yeah, I'm gonna say that that was partly because maybe I'd had a couple of lines that night.
So you guys just know to what a voxy is. A voxy is just a little piece to camera that you go off. It's like an interview just between you and your producer, and then they'll they'll take parts of that in you show.
Oh I'm an independent woman? What an absolute loser? I was? But all right, okay, going into the next episode.
Yeah. Four the photo shoot. Now, they always do the photo shoot. It's a really big thing. They put in all the magazines. Did you do it? No?
Specifically for Women's Day, isn't it? Or mine was? Anyway?
Think?
Oh who are Women's Day?
Okay, right, so one of the magazines, just to explain this episode to you, and why they do the photo shoot every year is because one of the magazines buy the rights to that photo shoot. So that's why there's always this episode where they do a bizarre themed photo shoot. Ours was like eighties pop tarts or something. What was your pop tart?
That's a breakfast food?
Isn't it? Also a band?
Pop stars? Oh shit, I love I used to love pop parts. Actually the chocolate ones perfect.
Well. It was like we were all dressed in I was dressed as the breakfast cereal. H what was yours?
Well? I wasn't invited on the photo shoot, so I didn't do it. But it was awkward for everybody. The girls hated every second of it. They peg these people together and then they make everyone else go watch the photo shoot and comment on it, and everyone gets nasty. And I saw that on this episode.
Oh yeah, they do it for the drama. They create this friction and this tension.
Yeah, so it was actually a really funny episode to watch.
Well, speaking of friction and tension, what about Abby and Matt and Bakoop? Oh my god, how was that for a little I feel like.
This is where we insert the rocky music like a fire, that would just look like it was going to be on Well.
I just wasn't expecting that from Abby my whole, and I think most people who watch it, my whole perception of Abby's character in this season has just shifted.
Is starting to turn She's a little vixen.
Wow.
People can get carried away with this turning into a competition that you just want to I mean, the whole Bachelor that you just want to win, regardless of what the ending is.
Oh yeah, absolutely. I think sometimes it's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you want to win the show. And what people forget is it's not Survivor. You don't win one hundred thousand dollars or.
One sort of like Survivor. Sometimes yeah, you're like, I would have taken a hundred thousand dollars.
It's not you don't win a prize. You win a boyfriend. So if you don't really like the guy that much, he's not really much of a prize then is he. People just get really caught up in wanting the challenge of getting him to fall in love. So I haven't made up my mind on Abby yet, but I think it got crazy sexual really quickly. Probably not the foundation for a healthy relationship.
Well, yeah, she did make that throwaway comment too, which I'm gonna think she regrets. But she said I can give him a happy ending. Oh that's what she said.
That's nice.
Yeah, And then I think later on she may have I mean, no, look, I think a lot can be misconstrued as well. She was just having a good time, stop being nice.
Trits over here fenceitting. It was way way too over the top, launchy. I think I also kind of disagree with the actions of it because there's this this unwritten law that you do not make out with someone at a cocktail party, like maybe people don't know about unless they've been in the show. It's just super disrespectful to the other girls to make out with the bachelor while everyone else is there, well.
Because everybody also thinks that you're a column away in this really romantic situation, but you're not. You've been pulled behind a tree with the bachelor. Everyone's a few meters away.
And everyone else is waiting, and everyone else still is going to go and speak to him in the next sort of ten minutes, twenty minutes, half an hour after that. So it's really uncomfortable to think that you're going to sit there talk to a guy, knowing full well that he's just literally two seconds ago in the same room made out with your friend. It really makes you feel insecure.
It never ever crossed my mind to kiss Nick at the party. At the cocktail party, I know what happens a lot in the American Anything goes in the American Bachelor. Someone in my season actually did kiss Nick at the party.
Who was that.
I'm not gonna say it because I'm not that person, and I do like this person and the difference is.
Did it make it onto the show.
No. Oh, I don't.
Throw things out there, and they keep secrets from the public.
Well, the difference is she didn't come back in and tell anyone or brag about it or throw it in anyone's face. It just sort of came out later between friends. And to be honest, I was I couldn't even care at that point, right, I think Abby just was shooting herself in the foot. She said, you know, I would never kiss him, would never kiss him.
Well, now that I'm thinking about it, I actually kiss Mad at a cocktail party. I'll shut up.
Oh my, oh my god, I'm a hussy. You just broke your own unwritten rule.
I did. I did. However, I'm gonna put down a very important however, at our cocktail parties, we had a thing called the Secret Garden, and Matt could take someone away there, so it was like a single date, which I guess what is what Abby had as well. But that's however, she told everyone she wasn't going to make out with him. I didn't do that, So I did make out with him. Oh god, I love what you're doing right now. Digging myself into a massive hole and drowning. I'm just gonna go throw myself in the ocean after this. I won't it's too cold. No, So she's told everyone she wasn't going to make out with him, and then she came back and bragged about it, and that was pretty gross. Form.
Yeah, I think she was a little bit excited, lipstick not on her face anymore, and it just it just makes the other girls feel shitty.
But I don't like it when people come back from dates and the first thing they do is really go over the top telling the other girls what happened and how amazing it was and what the kiss was like, because I do feel like it's pissing on your territory a little bit if cocking your leg and going, Okay, this guy's mine, and then you instill fear in the other girls, and you instill this insecurity that they're not gonna have a chance because your connection is so amazing.
Also, though, on the other hand, I feel like you can't win, So I think I was one of the only people that just kept that to myself. I remember I was the first kiss of the season and I came back in and all the girls were dying to know. First thing they asked, and I had decided I didn't. I wasn't gonna do that for respect for them as well, whether they could see that. But they couldn't. I said, Oh, I've just decided I'm gonna keep my date to myself. And I didn't say it in like a smug way. I was just trying to protect everyone involved. And they still hate it on me for that. You know, like she thinks she's better, she doesn't have to tell anyone. It doesn't matter what you do.
Well, no matter what you do, you're gonna have a target on your back if someone thinks that you are a front runner exactly. But there is ways to go about it that makes you sort of less just pretentious and less of course cocky.
I guess, yeah, be humble, Yeah, humble. I think that's a song.
Okay, I haven't heard it. Do you want to sing it for me?
No?
I think that's that's all I know. But we did skip something that I wanted to talk about, and that was the g Foce sexual in Nuino Monique and Matt fly through the air doing acrobatics. Date.
Oh yeah, I forgot about their date.
I like their day was that memorable?
Well, yeah, not really. It wasn't, but I mean I liked the date. I thought the date seemed really fun. It wasn't very romantic, but I think it was pretty cool what they got to do.
Oh, I was super jelly of what they were doing, the actual activity, but not really a bonding experience as such, because you're not even in the same air zone.
Well, Madam and I actually had a date where we were paragliding, so we were on separate we were strapped to separate people, and so we weren't together but you together. No, we were talking through walkie talkies and we were kind of in different spaces doing different things. It was still a really fun shared experience. So I'm guessing in like jet planes would be a really unshared experience as well, but it doesn't have that romance to it. However, they did mac on at the end, so romance was found.
Yeah, the sexual chemistry between him and Monique and him and Abbey, it's pretty off the chart, if the chart it really is. But I just wonder if it's that's it, if that's the level it's at.
I think so far that's all we've seen, to be honest, Yeah, we have. There's been a lot of macking on. I need to see more from Abby, just to know that she has that next bit of a deeper connection, more depth. Yeah, So I think for me, the highlight at the Rose ceremony was a vacuu godlover crying, that real raw emotion. But why was she crying?
Well, probably because she had sore feet, to be honest, but also I think it was relief. She just looked so stressed out that she was going to go home, and I broke my heart.
But I guess at that point in time, you're not really crying because your heart's broken. You're crying because you just want to stay longer for the possibility of what it could be, because she has not really spending time with him yet. So I felt like the tears might have been a little bit too much. Am I being really harsh?
Maybe? But no, No, I think the tears were too much. But everything is heightened in that environment. Your emotions are so heightened, so people are crying and upset over things they wouldn't be on the outside.
I agree, And also getting to that point of being the last person standing, no matter whether you have feelings or not for the bachelor. At that point, in time, there's a real sense of rejection and no one wants to be rejected, so it is a hard pill to swallow no matter what point in the journey that happens. Today, we are going to be talking a little bit about multiple dating. Is that okay, Brittany, what do you think?
Oh, this is a tough year because I have so many feelings on it and I feel like it's a bit of an onion, you know, like peel back the layers.
Well, okay, you're the one in this little duo who's actually dating. So are you multiple dating? I'm barely. I hope that no one who's dating Britain is listening to this. Yeah, because if.
I am multible dating no. Look, Actually, funny story I'm when I say how busy I am at the moment, I am so busy. I haven't had one night off in weeks. And there has actually been this one particular guy that has asked me out. If he's listening, Hi, there's been this one guy that there's been trying to take me out for a few weeks and I didn't want him to think it was an excuse. I literally said, I have I don't have a free night and not a lie, and he's and he's like, oh, well, you know, let me know when you can. And a few weeks went past, and then he responded to one of my Instagram stories saying, you know, I'm still waiting. So I thought, look, let's try again for the next few weeks. In a few weeks time, So then on Friday night, last minute, my plans were canceled. I had a girlfriend coming to stay and she couldn't stay anymore. So classic Brittany, I messaged this guy and I'm like, hey, so I'm free to go on a date, like in ten minutes if you want on a Friday night.
You booty called him. It was not a booty you fall on booty called.
That's just how this is why I am single, Because I ask you. It was like six pm, but I gave him my point is the poor guy and he said, oh, I'm so sorry. I've already got plans. Of course it's Friday night with ten minutes to notice. But I'm like, oh, well, don't say I didn't try. No, So no, I'm not dating one person, let alone multiple.
In any case. What is your what is your thoughts on dating multiple people at one time?
Okay, So I think that if you are single and you've just started seeing somebody, I think it's okay to be seen a few people at the same time, because that is, in my opinion, what dating is. You're trying to find the person you want to spend your whole life with. In that first few weeks, you could be going on a date with John on Monday, and then on Thursday you might go for a drink with Billy, and then on Saturday you might go for a drink with Frank. I think that's fine to have gone and met three different people in one week.
But for how long do you have these three people on rotation for before you make some decison?
That's an interesting question. I don't. I mean, I'm not a dating expert, whilst I claim to sometimes be.
Well you are here giving relationship advice, No, but.
I I have strong opinions. I think there are some rules that you probably need to follow, and things like if you start sleeping with one, Once you start sleeping with them, I think that that's it. I don't think you can be sleeping with three different people a week. Yeah, well, I mean you could a lot to take on. I feel exhausted thinking about this, thinking about the concept of dating multiple people, And for me, I'm such a fence sitter with this whole concept because I really think that if you've gone on a couple of dates with someone, then you should know whether or not there is something about that person that you want to pursue, and whether or not you want to continue to get to know them and explore who they are as a person. But if you're spreading yourself so thin over dating so many different people, how do you actually really connect with someone on a bit of a deeper level to figure out, yes, okay, I want to invest in this relationship more. And I'm not talking about like running to the altar and saying absolutely from day dot you can't date anyone else. But I mean, where, at what point are you being transparent and being kind to that other person's feelings. What if you're doing four people at once and then two of them you just culled because you're like, oh, you're fun, but there's nothing there cull them. But there's two people now that you have this strong, serious connection with, how do you go about just picking one? What if you're still trying to get deeper? Because I think it takes a little while to get to know somebody properly. So what if you're still trying to get deeper with both of them, would you just cull one and focus on one?
So have you had an open conversation with them about the fact that you're dating someone else and the fact that you are right now weighing up to different people.
One of my little rules in this would be that you have to be open. So if you're if the guy you're seeing says you're seeing somebody else, you say yes, and then you have that conversation and you go from there. If they're okay with it, great, If they're not, well, you need to figure out what you want. Is that person important enough to you to cull the other person. It's a pretty tricky situation. But I'm talking early days. I'm not talking dating six months in. I'm talking they get to know you stage.
But I think that for me, the concept of dating multiple people, there's sort of three reasons why you would do that if your true intention is that you want to be in a long term, committed relationship. I think one of the reasons why you would date multiple people is because you're trying to keep your options open, so you're still trying to figure out whether that person's right or not, which is completely fine. Number two would be that you're a bit afraid of commitment because you don't want to get hurt, and so it's easier to not be committed to one person and to spread yourself a bit then and then number three would be that you like the attention, which I think is a big call. But I'm saying this not because I'm trying to make anyone feel bad for doing it, but because I myself have been in the past someone who dates multiple people at the one time, and for me, it was like an attention meter thing. I got more satisfaction from having this drip fed attention. I wasn't really interested very much in any of them, because if somebody rose above who I was interested in, I would cull all the people that I'd been dating.
So it's more about just feeling wanton.
Yeah, I guess so, But I think from the minute that somebody did rise above the other people that I was dating, I would stop dating those people. So in essence, I wasn't really dating with this intention of any one person that I had in the boil at the time. To then have a long term relationship with I was just kind of dating an essence so that I wasn't alone and didn't have anyone on the burn. If that makes sense.
Yeah, that makes sense. So whilst I say that I think you should be feeling things out and dating a few different people, I've never actually been that person to do that because I have for myself. I've always looked at it in a way of well A, I'm pretty short on time and energy. Like you said, who could I actually be bothered? But I just think when I date somebody is because I have a really strong interest in them, and if I have a really strong interest in them, I obviously don't have one in somebody yet.
Well that's my exact point about this whole multiple dating thing.
But not everybody's like that. There are plenty of people that just want to go out and have dinner and drinks and go to smooth City and just just chill and have fun.
So I think that there just comes a point where if you're going to be dating multiple people, then you have to put that conversation on the table, and you have to be open, and you have to be honest.
The bottom line is honesty. Absolutely the only issue that I have with that, But there's always a butt.
There's always a butt is that innately, we don't want to hurt people's feelings, so it's very easy to sugarcoat the truth because it's not nice to tell someone else, Hey, I'm seeing X, Y and Z whilst i'm seeing you, and I think I like him better and I don't know who I like yet, so you just have to kind of wait and see.
I'm pretty sure are we talking about the Bachelor?
I know, right? Why does it have different rules? But I guess like the rules that are in the Bachelor don't really apply to normal day dating because you never have a situation where you have one person who's it's okay for them to date so many other people and then the other person's just sitting there waiting and pining.
Yeah, we definitely cannot compare them, but look, go nuts, do whatever you want with respect for everybody involved.
So if you can date multiple people and be completely transparent and honest from pretty much day dot, then there's not really anything too wrong with it. Is that what we're saying?
Yeah, and just use contraception for.
Welcome to the health tips from Brita and Laura, honestly too much.
You know what time it is. Now we're going to shuffle right along to my new favorite segment.
Oh what is that?
Ah?
I left that for you to do again by yourself.
You really just left me hanging there. I was just looking straight at you then like come with me, girl, and you didn't come with me.
Do you want to try it again?
Okay, welcome to ask Uncut.
That was beautiful mail there. So what is our question for today? Britt?
Okay, So we had a lovely lady write in and she was actually having a discussion with her friends at work and they all wroteing.
Together, which is cute.
So they were talking about their partners looking at women on Instagram, and she didn't say women, She actually used the term hot chicks. She said, is it okay for your partner to look at hot chicks on Instagram? General hot chicks or ex girlfriends? And if so, are they're sort of rules to doing that and guidelines. So he has apparently been doing it in the morning sometimes and before bed, and she feels like maybe he should be giving her that attention. Oh and I could not agree more.
Okay, So there's two different things here that I think they're both debatable. One is I don't have an issue with Matt, for example, looking at hot chicks on Instagram. Would I have an issue with him checking out his ex girlfriends on Instagram?
Yes, damn straight.
Why are you doing that? Why do you need to look at your ex girlfriends? Yeah, that's weird. The emphasis is on X. I do also think it comes down to everything in moderation. How often are they doing this. If they're doing it so frequently that it's causing insecurities and concern, then then it's clearly a problem.
Yeah. Look, I'm not a jealous person, and I think it's human nature to appreciate hotties.
I was going to say.
Beauty, but hotties. I think it's normal to appreciate when you walk down the street. Like my mom and dad have been married for forty years, and both of them will individually happily comment on someone that they think is a drunk. Oh my god, did you see that person? I'm beautiful? But doesn't mean anything, It's just they're appreciating a beautiful human form.
And that's also a testament to how comfortable they are in their relationship that they feel so secure with the other person that they can point that out and both appreciate it and it's not in any way threatening to their relationship.
Well, and that is the thing. Is he la in bed secretly looking at it while he thinks you're asleep, or are you laying next to each other having a chat, laughing and looking at the pitches together, Because obviously then there's no threat.
Even if he's doing it just in bed next to his partner and being really open about it, he obviously isn't doing it with intent, Like maybe he doesn't realize how like unthoughtful and insensitive it is to be doing that, and maybe that just needs to be a conversation that comes to the table. It's kind of like back in the day when guys would have Penthouse or Playboy or whatever else. The issue is, though, with Instagram, is that your partner can look at Playboy, he has no way that he's going to be able to then contact the girls that are on Playboy. The issue with Instagram is that it's almost as though Playboy has just put the phone number of the girl that's there, you know, like tattooed it on your hair. You can contact them. So Instagram has totally bridged that gap. Also, Instagram isn't just girls who are professional models, It's not just professional photo shoots. It's Sarah down the Roadde who lives in Bondai, who you might see at the beach one day. So there is this level of accessibility I think with Instagram as well, which can be even more threatening. Yeah, one dred.
Percent and it's I actually was having coffee the other day with my friends and somebody will pass in Bondai and they literally said, oh, I see him everywhere. Let me just find out his name. How are you going to find out his name? Like the internet, babe? And they just jumped on and looked for a friend of a friend and through and in ten minutes they had his name.
Isn't that crazy? How connected people are now?
So crazy?
And so I think that that's where that insecurity comes. If your partner is looking at chicks on Instagram, it's the fact that they're so accessible.
No it to answer this, there's definitely a line you need to tell him that you're not cool with it and how it makes you feel, which is obviously uncomfortable, and that he should not be waking up, rolling over and scrolling his phone looking at other women. He should be giving you that attention first thing in the morning.
Absolutely, there comes a point morning and nighttime where phones are off.
Yeah, so she asked, is she overreacting? Bottom line for me is no, you are not agree.
No, Oh great. I love it when we agree on things.
Sometimes it happens.
Do we have another question?
We do have one more question that I thought we could jump on in I cheated on my partner, but we have only been together for three weeks. It was definitely a mistake. Do I tell him or not? I don't know how I feel about this. I'm super against cheating, but three weeks is like, oh so early, and I don't know how serious they were. But she says we've been together, so I guess in her mind that's boyfriend girl friend.
Oh god, okay. And when you say it's a mistake, is it like she went out and she cheated on him because she was drunk. I don't know, not that there's any excuse for this stuff, but there are definitely layers to what's worse, you know, Like there's there's cheating that's real, real bad, and then there's cheating that's just bad.
I'm going to say because I did. We did talk about this in the last podcast where we said you can come back from cheating if you talk to each other and you get the right help and support. At this point, I am going to say to this person that I think you should just be honest with him and tell him if it is well, if it is only three weeks in, he'll probably be cool with it too.
You reckon, well, not cool with it.
But I feel like you're still at It's better than six months or a year. You're still at that early stage where she could just sort of say I just didn't really realize how serious we were yet and I made a mistake and all I could think about is you And she can definitely come back for that. But that's going to weigh on her for a long time, which she has a conscience anyway.
See, I think the opposite. I think if I was dating someone for three weeks and they told me that they cheated on me, I'd be like, I don't need this drama in my life. Get the road, Jack, assuming his name was Jack, but I don't need that.
What would you do? Then? Are you saying for her to tell him or not?
I'm going to sound like an absolute dickhead. But I'm saying I think you should tell him. However, practically your relationship will probably be over. Would I tell him? I don't know. I know Okay, I probably wouldn't tell him, but I know that I should and I would never do it again. Don't follow my advice because I'm being a bad person right now.
I totally get that too. I have one hundred pc understand that you say. It's been three weeks. I really want to keep this guy. I'm too scared to lose him. I know I'll never do it again, so I'm going to stick with it. Yeah, I just feel like it'd end up weighing me down and one day after two years.
Are like, I can't take it anymore. You're a good person, Brittany, You're a good, good person. You need to stop trying to booty call people. Ten minutes before, I'm.
Rolling my eyes at a disclaimer calling someone at six pm for tie takeaway. I don't feel like his booty.
Okay, OKAYK, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, so no bringing it up. I'm sorry. Guys. If you have any questions that you want to send to us so that we can answer them and fence it and not give you a proper straightforward answer. Please message us slide it into our DMS at Life Uncut podcast. We will discuss them on the next episode.
So my second favorite part of the episode is suck and sweet, and this is how we finish every episode. So, Laura, baby, hit me.
Really you want me to hit you?
Well, not literally, you take everything, so seriously literally throw those words down.
You want my suck and my sweet? Okay, So my sweet for this week was that go first, you know, oh, oh my god, I'm so sorry. My suck, my suck. My suck for this week was that I had to take Marley into Medicare so that I could finally get off my mum's Medicare card and get a new Medicare card that had Marley on it. However, halfway through waiting at Centerlink, Marley crapped herself and then I went to go and change her and realized I forgot to bring any baby wipes, so I had to use her own singlet to wipe her.
Butt because I am the most un organized mother in the world.
This is I am a child. So that was my suck the end. My sweet is much better than that. Matt's mum came and stayed with us this weekend and on Saturday night, Matt book tickets to go and see Harley Breen, who is a comedian, and he was brilliant. He has the TV show called Taboo, which is on in Channel ten.
And I haven't seen that.
It's really really funny. He like takes the piss out of things you should not take the piss out of. The show is about people with disabilities or people who have terminal illness, and I don't know if I could do that. It's done in a really clever way, so he gets to know them. Yeah, it actually is, and it's very thoughtful, and what it's sort of aimed at is trying to normalize the fact that people do have disabilities and people do stuffer from terminal illness. And it's just got a really black humor comedy about it.
So the people that he's paying out, he gets to stay on board with it.
Absolutely, he gets to know them, He spends time with them, and they absolutely loving sick this comedy. But one of my favorite bits was that he was talking about how babies when it's windy far more because they don't have the ability to stop the air from going into their mouth, and so they fill up with air and they fart more when it's windy, which is true. So I learned some really really important facts. If it's windy, your baby will far more hang on.
Is that actually true?
True?
It's true?
Did you look it up? Because I don't feel like it is.
No.
I just put Molley out the window and let us.
Guys, everyone docs, she's joking.
All right, Well, what's your sucker?
Baby? Why suck?
God?
I just you know, I kicked my toe last night so badly. And I know this is ridiculous, but you know when you kick your little toe on the corner of the bed and you feel like your leg has been chopped off. There was blood.
There was blood.
Yeah, the nail ripped. Oh dude, it was intense. It was super nialy there, it was touch and go.
It had to be pretty severe for it to be the suck of the week.
Bad All My week's just been pretty good.
Yeah, a toaster. Do you know what?
I broke my toe running through the Amazon jungle chasing wild pigs, and it was that foot. So I feel like I feel.
Like there was so much about that sentence that was weird.
Well, I think that's why it hurts so bad, because the tone never properly healed, so it's sensitive subject for multiple reasons.
Maybe I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that we had to chalk about your toe on multiple levels. Okay, what is your sweet?
And if that is not the sweet of everyone else's week listening, I don't know what is my sweet? Well, I don't know if I can actually use this because it hasn't happened, but it has half happened. So I just booked flights yesterday spontaneously to go up to the Gold Coast on the weekend. Oh yeah, my mom and dad are up there. I've got them a little beach house. I'm going to visit them.
Oh my gosh, that's so nice.
Yeah, my brothers, my nephew. So we're gonna have a little family time on this really nice little beach house and just chill. I've booked a winery. I love me, no one else, just me. Can I come as you can? Perfect booked you a flight to this. This is my sweet as well. I'm going to change it. Screw Harley Breen. You just don't get any of the rules. Laura. You can't change but guys, that is it for us for this week. We hope you enjoyed.
If you have enjoyed, then please hit the subscribe button, give us five stars, lack you with your Uber driver, tell your family, tell your friends, and tell your dog. Leave a review, tell your dog. Yeah, tell everyone, and please join us next week for another episode. And before we sign off, we just wanted to say a huge thank you to everybody that wrote in with support and love and sharing their stories from last week's episode on dating a sociopath. We just are overwhelmed with how many of you have actually taken the times right to us but have actually also gone through something like this as well. So it was really amazing actually the amount of responses that we received. So Britt, thank you so much for sharing your story as well, because I know that that was huge for you.
It was huge, but you're very welcome and it looks like it has helped a lot of people, so if they're happy, I'm happy.
Well. Guys, thank you for listening and we can't wait to see you all again and answer not answer your questions. Yeah, shower guys. See you guys,
