Your typical small talk is LOADED with inappropriate questions. Think about it: you ask a person you just met whether they’re married or if they have kids. If they’re new in town, you ask them why they moved here. The answers to those questions are rarely simple, and they sometimes lead to awkward, intimate conversations - right there, next to the bean dip. 

This week, we explore keeping secrets - in small talk, in the workplace, in families, and out in the wider world with listener questions about outing someone’s sexuality after their death, and whether you should tell the truth or preserve your privacy when someone asks how many kids you have. 

Want your questions answered on the show? To submit your questions by voicemail, call us at (323) 643-3768 or visit megandevine.co




In this episode we cover:
The difference between “secret” and “private”
Whether you should out someone’s gender or sexuality after their death
Why it’s ok to only tell part of the story (or none of it) when someone asks a personal question based on your public information
Where to go for help if you feel like you can’t tell the people around you what you’re going through
The real problem with small talk 







Questions to Carry with you:



Building a small talk library of questions that don’t suck: a group project







Resources: 

Free Mom Hugs is the best place I know if you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community and feel like no one’s on your side. You might also check with the Trevor Project, GLAAD, or google LGBTQIA+ resources in your area and online. 

That scene I reference from Schitt’s Creek is in season five, episode 11 (Meet the Parents). Check it out on Netflix. 




Wish you could connect with grieving people who truly, truly get how complicated death and grief can be? The next session of the Writing Your Grief course and community is open for registration now. Your loss is unique, and you are three thousand percent definitely not alone. 

Clinician or medical provider? Be sure to visit megandevine.co to learn about trainings and resources to help your clients navigate these issues. 

Get in touch: 

Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of Here After with Megan Devine. Tune in, subscribe, leave a review, send in your questions, and share the show with everyone you know. Together, we can make things better, even when they can’t be made right. 




To submit your questions by voicemail, call us at (323) 643-3768 or visit megandevine.co

For more information, including clinical training and consulting, visit us at www.Megandevine.co

For grief support & education, follow us at @refugeingrief on IG, FB, & TW

Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s Okay That You're Not Okay and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed

 Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Your typical small talk is LOADED with inappropriate questions. Think about it: you ask a person you just met whether they’re married or if they have kids. If they’re new in town, you ask them why they moved here. The answers to those questions are rarely simple, and they sometimes lead to awkward, intimate conversations - right there, next to the bean dip. This week, we explore keeping secrets - in small talk, in the workplace, in families, and out in the wider world with listener questions about outing someone’s sexuality after their death, and whether you should tell the truth or preserve your privacy when someone asks how many kids you have. Want your questions answered on the show? To submit your questions by voicemail, call us at (323) 643-3768 or visit megandevine.co In this episode we cover:<ul>
<li>The difference between “secret” and “private”</li>
<li>Whether you should out someone’s gender or sexuality after their death</li>
<li>Why it’s ok to only tell part of the story (or none of it) when someone asks a personal question based on your public information</li>
<li>Where to go for help if you feel like you can’t tell the people around you what you’re going through</li>
<li>The real problem with small talk </li>
</ul> Questions to Carry with you: <ul><li>Building a small talk library of questions that don’t suck: a group project</li></ul> Resources: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/freemomhugs/">Free Mom Hugs</a> is the best place I know if you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community and feel like no one’s on your side. You might also check with the <a href="https://www.thetrevorproject.org/">Trevor Project</a>, <a href="https://www.glaad.org/">GLAAD</a>, or google LGBTQIA+ resources in your area and online. That scene I reference from Schitt’s Creek is in season five, episode 11 (Meet the Parents). Check it out on <a href="https://www.netflix.com/watch/81092815?trackId=200257859">Netflix</a>.  Wish you could connect with grieving people who truly, truly get how complicated death and grief can be? The next session of the <a href="http://refugeingrief.com/wyg">Writing Your Grief</a> course and community is open for registration now. Your loss is unique, and you are three thousand percent definitely not alone. Clinician or medical provider? Be sure to visit <a href="http://megandevine.co/">megandevine.co</a> to learn about trainings and resources to help your clients navigate these issues. Get in touch: Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of Here After with Megan Devine. Tune in, subscribe, leave a review, send in your questions, and share the show with everyone you know. Together, we can make things better, even when they can’t be made right.  To submit your questions by voicemail, call us at (323) 643-3768 or visit <a href="http://megandevine.co/">megandevine.co</a>For more information, including clinical training and consulting, visit us at <a href="http://www.megandevine.co/">www.Megandevine.co</a>For grief support &amp; education, follow us at @refugeingrief on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/refugeingrief/">IG</a>, <a href="https://www.facebook.com/refugeingrief">FB</a>, &amp; <a href="https://twitter.com/refugeingrief">TW</a>Check out Megan’s best-selling books - <a href="http://refugeingrief.com/book">It’s Okay That You're Not Okay and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed</a>   Learn more about your ad-choices at <a href="https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com">https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com</a>

Life is full of difficult things, from tiny everyday disappointments to life-altering events. Everyone’s at least a little bit Not OK, something grief expert and psychotherapist Megan Devine knows from the inside out. In wide ranging, insightful, deep conversations, Megan talks with people about their often invisible losses - and what they’ve learned about being seen and supported in difficult times. 

With guests pulled from the front lines of entertainment, medicine, education, and activism, the conversations in It’s OK that You’re Not OK are funny, complex, emotional, and hopeful - maybe not your typical dinner party topics, but none of us are entirely OK, and it’s time we start talking about that.

New episodes each and every Monday, from the author of the best-selling book, It’s OK That You’re Not OK, and iHeartMedia. Find Megan online at @refugeingrief & follow the show @ItsOKPod

Life is full of difficult things, from tiny everyday disappointments to life-altering events. Everyone’s at least a little bit Not OK, something grief expert and psychotherapist Megan Devine knows from the inside out. In wide ranging, insightful, deep conversations, Megan talks with people about their often invisible losses - and what they’ve learned about being seen and supported in difficult times. 
With guests pulled from the front lines of entertainment, medicine, education, and activism, the conversations in It’s OK that You’re Not OK are funny, complex, emotional, and hopeful - maybe not your typical dinner party topics, but none of us are entirely OK, and it’s time we start talking about that.
New episodes each and every Monday, from the author of the best-selling book, It’s OK That You’re Not OK, and iHeartMedia. Find Megan online at @refugeingrief &amp; follow the show @ItsOKPod

It’s OK That You’re Not OK with Megan Devine

Keeping Secrets

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/e73c998e-6e60-432f-8610-ae210140c5b1/clips/a7895be5-0daa-4340-9cbd-ae4a0090a1d4/transcript

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