This episode talks about the crucial concept of being well-attuned to a child's emotional needs and feelings, emphasising the profound impact it has on their development. Through a detailed exploration of a case involving a young mother with a traumatic past, the episode highlights how a lack of attunement can lead to significant harm and distress for the child. The narrative underscores the importance of parents being present, empathetic, and understanding towards their children, as this forms the foundation for building strong attachments and fostering a healthy upbringing. .

KEY TAKEAWAYS


Attunement is crucial in parenting, as it involves tuning in and connecting with a child on an emotional level, providing understanding, validation, and support.


Parents who are well attuned to their children's emotional needs and thoughts are more likely to build strong attachments and positively impact their children's mental health.


Lack of attunement can lead to emotional harm and distress in children, as seen in the case of a mother who struggled to connect with her son due to her own childhood experiences.


Being attuned to a child's emotions, thoughts, and needs is essential for effective parenting and sets the foundation for a child's well-being and development.


Consistently providing well-attuned parenting positively impacts a child's life trajectory and is a crucial skill for parents to develop and exercise.

BEST MOMENTS

"When a parent or an adult is able to understand what's going on for a child and can accurately describe how a child thinks and feels, we can say that that adult is well attuned to the child."

"Parents who lack the capacity to be well attuned to the needs, wishes and feelings of their children are often lacking in insight and consumed or focused on their own issues."

"It appears she thought this way because her abuser, a family member, had told her that her grandmother and mother would kill her, and she had believed it."

"Being attuned to your child's emotions, thoughts and needs, and being able to act consistently in accordance with those needs is one of the most important skills you can develop and exercise as a parent."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

familycourtcoaching@gmail.com

Instagram: michael240656

HOST BIO

Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

This episode talks about the crucial concept of being well-attuned to a child's emotional needs and feelings, emphasising the profound impact it has on their development. Through a detailed exploration of a case involving a young mother with a traumatic past, the episode highlights how a lack of attunement can lead to significant harm and distress for the child. The narrative underscores the importance of parents being present, empathetic, and understanding towards their children, as this forms the foundation for building strong attachments and fostering a healthy upbringing. .
KEY TAKEAWAYS
<ul>
<li>
Attunement is crucial in parenting, as it involves tuning in and connecting with a child on an emotional level, providing understanding, validation, and support.
</li>
<li>
Parents who are well attuned to their children's emotional needs and thoughts are more likely to build strong attachments and positively impact their children's mental health.
</li>
<li>
Lack of attunement can lead to emotional harm and distress in children, as seen in the case of a mother who struggled to connect with her son due to her own childhood experiences.
</li>
<li>
Being attuned to a child's emotions, thoughts, and needs is essential for effective parenting and sets the foundation for a child's well-being and development.
</li>
<li>
Consistently providing well-attuned parenting positively impacts a child's life trajectory and is a crucial skill for parents to develop and exercise.
</li>
</ul>
BEST MOMENTS
"When a parent or an adult is able to understand what's going on for a child and can accurately describe how a child thinks and feels, we can say that that adult is well attuned to the child."
"Parents who lack the capacity to be well attuned to the needs, wishes and feelings of their children are often lacking in insight and consumed or focused on their own issues."
"It appears she thought this way because her abuser, a family member, had told her that her grandmother and mother would kill her, and she had believed it."
"Being attuned to your child's emotions, thoughts and needs, and being able to act consistently in accordance with those needs is one of the most important skills you can develop and exercise as a parent."
VALUABLE RESOURCES
familycourtcoaching@gmail.com
Instagram: michael240656
HOST BIO
Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

Have you ever wondered why some evidence you present in court is perceived as credible and noteworthy, while other evidence is disregarded? If so, you've come to the right place. As a professional, giving evidence in the family court and undergoing cross-examination can be overwhelming due to its adversarial nature. However, imagine presenting your evidence with confidence and composure, rather than anxiety and defensiveness. What if you were fully prepared for your time in the witness box? Our host has 32 years of experience in court and is the best-selling author of 'Family Court: Giving Evidence in Family Court.'



Tune in to discover how to become an InCredible Witness!

Have you ever wondered why some evidence you present in court is perceived as credible and noteworthy, while other evidence is disregarded? If so, you've come to the right place. As a professional, giving evidence in the family court and undergoing cross-examination can be overwhelming due to its adversarial nature. However, imagine presenting your evidence with confidence and composure, rather than anxiety and defensiveness. What if you were fully prepared for your time in the witness box? Our host has 32 years of experience in court and is the best-selling author of 'Family Court: Giving Evidence in Family Court.'
 
Tune in to discover how to become an InCredible Witness!

InCredible Witness

Attunement

This episode provides valuable insights on how to effectively give evidence in a court setting. Michael emphasises the importance of thorough preparation, mental and emotional readiness, and maintaining control over one's nerves and emotions while in the witness box. Overall, the episode serves as a comprehensive guide on how to navigate the challenges of giving evidence in a court setting successfully.

KEY TAKEAWAYS


Thorough Preparation: Before giving evidence, it is crucial to prepare diligently both mentally and emotionally to handle the stress and pressure of the witness box.


Maintain Control: Stay in control of your nerves and emotions, and have complete faith in your ability to present your evidence effectively.


Listen Carefully: Avoid rushing to answer questions and make sure to listen fully to each question posed to provide satisfactory answers.


Stay Focused: Concentrate fully on each question, think about your response, and avoid giving unnecessary information that may compromise your position.


Professionalism: Maintain a balanced and professional demeanor, avoid getting angry or distressed, and address your answers clearly to the judge to ensure your evidence is valued highly.

BEST MOMENTS

"You cannot afford to have a poor attitude and frame of mind when giving evidence. When you enter into the witness box You should be in control of your nerves and emotions, as opposed to them being in control of you."

"Your state of mind should be such that you expect no help from anyone. You recognize you are totally alone, and have complete faith and confidence in your ability to present your evidence very well."

"Giving evidence should never involve you talking for talking's sake. When you open your mouth too freely you are likely to give away unnecessary information that may place you in difficult situations that you may live to regret later."

"The hugest mistake you can make when in the witness box is to lose control of your emotions by getting angry, agitated or distressed. When angry or agitated, you lose focus and concentration, rendering you unable to access that part of your brain that enables you to be able to think and respond appropriately and creatively."

"On a final note, it is a mistake to fail to speak up and address your answers to the judge. She or he needs to hear what you are saying at all times. So angle your head towards the judge when responding to questions and ensure you speak loud enough and in a clear manner so that the judge can hear and clearly understand you."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

familycourtcoaching@gmail.com

Instagram: michael240656

HOST BIO

Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

This episode provides valuable insights on how to effectively give evidence in a court setting. Michael emphasises the importance of thorough preparation, mental and emotional readiness, and maintaining control over one's nerves and emotions while in the witness box. Overall, the episode serves as a comprehensive guide on how to navigate the challenges of giving evidence in a court setting successfully.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
<ul>
<li>
Thorough Preparation: Before giving evidence, it is crucial to prepare diligently both mentally and emotionally to handle the stress and pressure of the witness box.
</li>
<li>
Maintain Control: Stay in control of your nerves and emotions, and have complete faith in your ability to present your evidence effectively.
</li>
<li>
Listen Carefully: Avoid rushing to answer questions and make sure to listen fully to each question posed to provide satisfactory answers.
</li>
<li>
Stay Focused: Concentrate fully on each question, think about your response, and avoid giving unnecessary information that may compromise your position.
</li>
<li>
Professionalism: Maintain a balanced and professional demeanor, avoid getting angry or distressed, and address your answers clearly to the judge to ensure your evidence is valued highly.
</li>
</ul>
BEST MOMENTS
"You cannot afford to have a poor attitude and frame of mind when giving evidence. When you enter into the witness box You should be in control of your nerves and emotions, as opposed to them being in control of you."
"Your state of mind should be such that you expect no help from anyone. You recognize you are totally alone, and have complete faith and confidence in your ability to present your evidence very well."
"Giving evidence should never involve you talking for talking's sake. When you open your mouth too freely you are likely to give away unnecessary information that may place you in difficult situations that you may live to regret later."
"The hugest mistake you can make when in the witness box is to lose control of your emotions by getting angry, agitated or distressed. When angry or agitated, you lose focus and concentration, rendering you unable to access that part of your brain that enables you to be able to think and respond appropriately and creatively."
"On a final note, it is a mistake to fail to speak up and address your answers to the judge. She or he needs to hear what you are saying at all times. So angle your head towards the judge when responding to questions and ensure you speak loud enough and in a clear manner so that the judge can hear and clearly understand you."
VALUABLE RESOURCES
familycourtcoaching@gmail.com
Instagram: michael240656
HOST BIO
Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

The Worst Things To Do In The Witness Box

Join Michael as he explores the disturbing reality of parents or step-parents killing their own children, shedding light on the term "filicide" and its various forms such as neonaticide and infanticide. Through research findings and expert insights, the episode explores the motives behind filicide, ranging from altruistic reasons to revenge and emphasises the importance of understanding the underlying factors to prevent future tragedies. Overall, the episode serves as a thought-provoking exploration of a tragic and sensitive topic, urging for greater awareness and prevention efforts to protect children from harm.

KEY TAKEAWAYS


On average, 58 children in the UK are killed by family members, parents, or step-parents each year, highlighting the alarming frequency of child deaths at the hands of those expected to care for them.


Filicide, the killing of one's child, is a disturbing reality that prompts questions about the motives and circumstances that lead to such heinous acts.


Mental illness plays a significant role in cases of filicide, with a study showing that 37% of perpetrators were suffering from a form of mental illness, emphasising the need for further research and understanding in this area.


Different motives for filicide include altruistic reasons, fatal abuse or ill-treatment, unwanted children, psychotic states, and revenge, shedding light on the complex psychological factors at play.


Factors such as mental health issues, relationship breakdowns, domestic violence, substance misuse, and child abuse often coincide in cases of filicide, underscoring the importance of identifying and addressing these risk factors to prevent future tragedies.

BEST MOMENTS

"I was stunned by that statistic because even as a social worker who has worked with children over many years, the frequency or rate of children being killed was conspicuous."

"Filicide refers to the killing of one's son or daughter. As a result of doing this research, I was introduced to more words that I had hitherto not known about."

"In a study involving 297 cases of convicted philicides and 45 cases of philicide suicides in England and Wales between January 1997 and December 2006, it was revealed that there was an over-representation of mental illness in cases of philicide."

"Philip J. Resnick, a well-known forensic psychiatrist, found that neonaticidal mothers are often unmarried women with unwanted pregnancies who receive no prenatal care."

"Gaining as clear a picture as possible about the circumstances, reasons and factors that lead parents to perpetrate filicide are of critical significance if we are to prevent and lessen future unnecessary child deaths."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

familycourtcoaching@gmail.com

Instagram: michael240656

HOST BIO

Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

Join Michael as he explores the disturbing reality of parents or step-parents killing their own children, shedding light on the term "filicide" and its various forms such as neonaticide and infanticide. Through research findings and expert insights, the episode explores the motives behind filicide, ranging from altruistic reasons to revenge and emphasises the importance of understanding the underlying factors to prevent future tragedies. Overall, the episode serves as a thought-provoking exploration of a tragic and sensitive topic, urging for greater awareness and prevention efforts to protect children from harm.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
<ul>
<li>
On average, 58 children in the UK are killed by family members, parents, or step-parents each year, highlighting the alarming frequency of child deaths at the hands of those expected to care for them.
</li>
<li>
Filicide, the killing of one's child, is a disturbing reality that prompts questions about the motives and circumstances that lead to such heinous acts.
</li>
<li>
Mental illness plays a significant role in cases of filicide, with a study showing that 37% of perpetrators were suffering from a form of mental illness, emphasising the need for further research and understanding in this area.
</li>
<li>
Different motives for filicide include altruistic reasons, fatal abuse or ill-treatment, unwanted children, psychotic states, and revenge, shedding light on the complex psychological factors at play.
</li>
<li>
Factors such as mental health issues, relationship breakdowns, domestic violence, substance misuse, and child abuse often coincide in cases of filicide, underscoring the importance of identifying and addressing these risk factors to prevent future tragedies.
</li>
</ul>
BEST MOMENTS
"I was stunned by that statistic because even as a social worker who has worked with children over many years, the frequency or rate of children being killed was conspicuous."
"Filicide refers to the killing of one's son or daughter. As a result of doing this research, I was introduced to more words that I had hitherto not known about."
"In a study involving 297 cases of convicted philicides and 45 cases of philicide suicides in England and Wales between January 1997 and December 2006, it was revealed that there was an over-representation of mental illness in cases of philicide."
"Philip J. Resnick, a well-known forensic psychiatrist, found that neonaticidal mothers are often unmarried women with unwanted pregnancies who receive no prenatal care."
"Gaining as clear a picture as possible about the circumstances, reasons and factors that lead parents to perpetrate filicide are of critical significance if we are to prevent and lessen future unnecessary child deaths."
VALUABLE RESOURCES
familycourtcoaching@gmail.com
Instagram: michael240656
HOST BIO
Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

Filicide

This episode explores the unexpected connection between social work and the act of selling. Michael talks about why social workers are constantly selling their beliefs and values to parents in order to advocate for the best interests of children. Drawing parallels between personal interactions and court appearances, Michael emphasises the importance of presenting oneself positively, both in attitude and appearance, to effectively influence others. Ultimately, the episode concludes by highlighting the crucial aspect of believing in oneself before attempting to sell one's beliefs to others.

KEY TAKEAWAYS


Recognise the importance of selling oneself in various aspects of life, including social work and giving evidence in court.


Present oneself in a physically presentable manner, such as dressing appropriately, to make a good impression and show respect.


Have a positive attitude and demeanour, as it can significantly impact how one is perceived before even speaking.


Be well-prepared and knowledgeable about the evidence being presented, displaying confidence and persuasiveness.


Emphasise the significance of believing in oneself and one's abilities as a crucial aspect of effectively selling oneself to others.

BEST MOMENTS

"From being someone who was quite adverse to the idea of selling, to one in which I now accept my involvement in it and in fact recognise how important selling is to the success of my role as a social worker."

"You're actually engaged in selling yourself all the time, it's just that you don't see yourself as doing so." 

"Poor attitudes are like neon lights or neon signs glowing in the dark, announcing your poor disposition, thoughts and feelings." 

"Attending court wearing trainers, a hoodie and a pair of jeans exposing part of your underwear does not tend to portray you in the best possible light." 

"In giving great evidence at court or selling yourself well, how or the way you say it is as important, if not more so, than what you say." 

VALUABLE RESOURCES

familycourtcoaching@gmail.com

Instagram: michael240656

HOST BIO

Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

This episode explores the unexpected connection between social work and the act of selling. Michael talks about why social workers are constantly selling their beliefs and values to parents in order to advocate for the best interests of children. Drawing parallels between personal interactions and court appearances, Michael emphasises the importance of presenting oneself positively, both in attitude and appearance, to effectively influence others. Ultimately, the episode concludes by highlighting the crucial aspect of believing in oneself before attempting to sell one's beliefs to others.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
<ul>
<li>
Recognise the importance of selling oneself in various aspects of life, including social work and giving evidence in court.
</li>
<li>
Present oneself in a physically presentable manner, such as dressing appropriately, to make a good impression and show respect.
</li>
<li>
Have a positive attitude and demeanour, as it can significantly impact how one is perceived before even speaking.
</li>
<li>
Be well-prepared and knowledgeable about the evidence being presented, displaying confidence and persuasiveness.
</li>
<li>
Emphasise the significance of believing in oneself and one's abilities as a crucial aspect of effectively selling oneself to others.
</li>
</ul>
BEST MOMENTS
"From being someone who was quite adverse to the idea of selling, to one in which I now accept my involvement in it and in fact recognise how important selling is to the success of my role as a social worker."
"You're actually engaged in selling yourself all the time, it's just that you don't see yourself as doing so." 
"Poor attitudes are like neon lights or neon signs glowing in the dark, announcing your poor disposition, thoughts and feelings." 
"Attending court wearing trainers, a hoodie and a pair of jeans exposing part of your underwear does not tend to portray you in the best possible light." 
"In giving great evidence at court or selling yourself well, how or the way you say it is as important, if not more so, than what you say." 
VALUABLE RESOURCES
familycourtcoaching@gmail.com
Instagram: michael240656
HOST BIO
Michael Watson is a qualified social worker and author with over thirty years of experience working with children and families. As an expert in family court, Michael is in a key position to assist, advise, and coach parents through their private law family proceedings and provide them with the information and skills to represent themselves successfully in court. His two books, ‘How to Represent Yourself in Family Court’, and ‘FAMILY COURT: Giving Evidence In Family Court’, provide parents with a clearer understanding of family court proceedings, legislation, and parenting skills.

Attunement

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