I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger WinegarBridger doesn't hold it against Mary Lynn Rajskub (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, 24) when she thoughtlessly arrives with an unwanted gift. The two discuss reading retention, dried fruit, and vanishing child actors.
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Have a question for I Said No Emails or a Gift or a Curse suggestion? Email us at isaidnogifts@gmail.com and Bridger may or may not read it aloud on the show.
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Well, I invited you.
Hear, I thought, I made myself perfectly clear, But you're.
A guess to my home.
You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guess your own presences presence, and I already had too much stuff.
So how did you dan to surbey me?
Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. What's going on? I started the day in a bad mood. I went to bed in a bad mood. I tried watching this thing called The Curious Case of Natalie Grace, Natalia Grace, I don't know which. I thought was just going to be thrilling and exciting, trashy documentary documentaries may be generous, And then it was so horribly made that I had stopped watching it, and I never learned whether or not this couple accidentally adopted an evil thirty year old. And so now I'm not even going to look into it. I guess I just have to hopefully someone will just mention to me what actually happened. But it was a real piece of crap, and oh it set me off. So I hate to start the podcast in this way. And now I'm thinking about how the photo app is still horrible on the iPhone. What's happening there? They haven't changed. It's universally hated and they're just making a stick with it. I don't try to start this with so much complaining, but Natalia or Natalie Grace set me off. I'm sorry, Let's get into the show. Maybe that will help things. I adore today's guest. It's Mary Lynn Rice called Mary Lynn.
Oh, Hello, you said my last name correctly.
Your last name is so interesting. It's like, I mean, if you weren't aware of how to pronounce it beforehand, it would be a nightmare to get into. But once you know, it's just two words.
I kind of like that. It's like, why don't you know? How about you look out to it and then talk to me and don't talk to me until then. Don't don't come up to me with a.
Red Yeah, what do you get done with that?
We're done with that. Don't not try, don't give.
Up, don't give up. I think I and like, I'll be a guest on podcasts occasionally, and it's just like, certainly just look into it for thirty seconds, you'll know how to pronounce my last name. You have the internet.
Weininger wind Wow, look well, I've heard you say that I did a little you know how to spruce up.
Well. I have people in my life who still say Winneger, winegar close.
I got scared as it was coming out of my mouth.
It was beautiful. I mean, it's the kind of the last guess for the pronunciation of my name, which is oh really, I mean, I guess whin a Ger makes sense, Winegar makes sense, but it has that little speed bump in the middle winegar, And wow.
Yours is almost harder than mine in a way. I suddenly have compassion for what seems like a simpler name but somehow is more complicated. There's three reasonable ways to say it.
But I feel like with your name, once you've heard it, once you get it.
Yes, but I have seen people, a lot of hosts. I'll see them panic and I just go, just whatever comes out of your mouth. That's fine, because the panic's not going to help you. We all know that. But once you panic, it goes too far right, And then I appreciate those people even more because they're trying. You know, What's how about a show with a host that doesn't think the host is important? So I love people that want want to say the name and then I and then I go, hey, don't just sign, but yeah, I have to give the the mnemonic rice and a cup and then it's done. But if you get locked in your brain in a certain way and you're not listening.
You're just imagining that word in your head.
Letters, which is understandable.
What you get most often a give up.
Or adding a syllable.
Oh sure, did you get telemarketers like some people.
Will confidently go is that uh you know Swedish and the J is like an I. I'm like, slow down. I don't even believe that the way that it's pronounced.
Is correct, like the actual origin.
Yes, I don't you know who knows?
That's always the same with me.
Right at the beginning of it, there was an e added or there. Someone said it with three syllables, and that's how it's done.
It was probably it probably was a vin like I'm sure whatever country it came from, W was a V.
Right, and then maybe the middle was more smushed together.
Yeah originally smith.
Uh No.
I do think living with my entire mess of a name has made me very I'm not sensitive, I'm not precious at all. Because it's been butchered my entire life first and last name. So when people get kind of sensitive about their names, it's just like whatever, Yeah, who cares your name.
Is very literary, isn't that?
I guess it's I mean, it's a name you don't see very often. Two names you don't see at all. Yes, although the thing with Bridger is it's just kind of the masculine version of Bridget. But people cannot conceptualize that, cannot handle Bridger for some reason, despite Bridget being like the most common. Although I don't know many Bridgets. I don't know one Bridget Bridget. I know of Bridge.
It's a great name.
It is a good name.
There should be more Bridgers. I'm glad there's not, because there's only one you.
Yeah, I'm trying to think of any other Bridges that I am aware. I mean there are, Like we're having a Bridger moment in kind of the zeitgeys because there's Bridger ten right, voebe Bridgers right. Oh, and uh, there's this new show called I can't remember the name of the show, but they're going to Fort Bridger or they're trying to. I've watched about ten minutes of the show, so far. That's a place in Western Yeah, oh yeah, there's a place in Wyoming called Fort Bridge, or maybe maybe in Utah. I don't know.
How are you pretty fantastic? Pretty fantastic? I mean, I'd like to complain too, just because it's fun. Sure, But if I go beyond the complaining, I realize my life is great.
You know what I want to complain about having a rush.
I'm to the point in my life where, I mean, we all are to a certain extent, just because of the circumstances of the world, where we're having to cut things out and conserve energy so that we don't lose our gd minds. We're having to consolidate check in with our person so that we don't completely lose it. But I'm also of an age and a point in my life where.
I just don't rush me. You know who's rushing you?
Just life. That's a great question. Thank you for that. Of my world lit teacher showing up on the first day, going we've got a lot to get through, It's like, who's got a lot to get through?
Would you stop?
I don't know if we're gonna make it. You're you're in control.
Why am I stressed?
Before I even started, which, by the way, I might have some sort of learning disability. I could not read. I could not everything I read in Worldlit. Each word seemed important to me, and I would I couldn't get through. While others were discussing themes and topics, I was like, what about the uh? I can't even come up with an example. It's such a buried memory.
Do you feel like you're a slow reader in general?
I'm not a slow reader, I think, and I think I can pinpoint when this happened in maybe this is the answer to who's rushing me? I've just uncovered it. When I was in seventh grade, they had this microfiche machine to test your speed of reading. And I had just had a hair gel incident that morning where I tried to do something and it didn't work and I had to leave the house. And I was too I was already too damaged about it. I wasn't about to put my head under the sink. So I had to go with what happened. So I wore a hoodie and then they made me take down the.
Hoodie reveal the crust.
I revealed the crust. They forced me to reveal the crust and I went in the microfiche and it was a to test the speed of your reading, and they gave you the rules, which I couldn't I can't listen, you know, but I think part of the rules were somewhere in there was make sure you digest. They warned you against, and I just did what they told you not to do, which is I got through this really fast. And to this day I think I love to read things, but then at the end, I'll go what happened? And even lately I think I need to test myself on what I've read. Otherwise what's the point.
I would love for books to come with little quizzes, or for there to be there probably is an app that you can, like, after every chapter, quiz yourself for a while, well after every chapter, because I, yeah, I'll get through a thing and I'll be like, I might be able to remember a character name. Okay, my reading comprehension has ebbs destroyed.
And then you go and have your day and when you come back to the book, which you think, oh, I'm gonna and then I'm like, I don't remember what was.
Happening now what I've started doing. Just in the last couple of months is when I'm done with the chapter, I just try as hard as possible to remember everything. What did I just read? I'm so excited I brought this up. This is real. I think it's a real problem. I think probably because our attention spends have really been decimated. But I still want to read. But I also want to read a lot, and so that all comes together to me spending time looking at words and none of them entering my brain. So I'm trying to get better at that. But then recently, like at the end of the year, there were all these people on TikTok that were like end of the year list. I read twenty four hundred books this year. What are you talking about?
I know, no, stop.
It's just the amount of books these people are reading.
I'm completely unlikable, I have no relationships. It sucking, asshole.
Yeah, I feel like I'm lucky if I read two books a month, and I'm reading pretty regularly, but I'm trying to slow down and actually make it count and actually get something out of it. Otherwise, what's the point?
I love that.
Are you doing fiction or mostly fiction? Okay, although nonfiction I find more and more is easier to get through I don't know why. I guess because I like.
At least like it would be harder to get through.
I think I can convince myself that I'm learning, and so I'm like, oh I can this is helpful to me. And of course, like the subjects I'm reading about are not useful in ordinary life at all.
So the things you may be more emotionally involved in, or is that a sleep.
That might be? Yeah, it's a great question. And now I'm trying to think of the last piece of nonfiction I read, and I couldn't. What are you reading The Secret?
You read The Secret, but I'm.
Only only ever reading The Secret. I'm listening to it on audio book.
Yeah, just trying to get it in there.
I'm visualizing the life I want.
When will I get the red bike in the window? Turns out you never really wanted the red bike. You were negating the red bike as you were saying yes to the red bike?
Are you more of a fiction or nonfiction person?
I honestly am not a big reader reader. Would I aspire to be a big reader? And I have a friend comic Michelle Billoon.
Oh sure, sure.
We became friends sort of recently and we have a Vigorous Voice memo, and early in the Voice Memos, we decided we were going to start reading. So that's been really fun, right, and we did. We did one whole book together so far.
What book I already forgot Katherine, Catherine. It's about a girl, okay.
Who is in a forest and that there's sisters in the Northwest. One of them is a beauty queen and one of them is a psycholog ashamed child psychologist.
And then you haven't read this because it'll be so mortifying that I don't remember anyone.
What's the We're about to read another one of her books and I'm not remembering this. This is my brain and I'm not remembering the author's name right this second.
It's not a terrifying it really is.
I hate it so much.
I wonder if it feels terrible.
It feels terrible.
Catherine. I can't think of a single.
She's a very popular, prolific, sometimes oftentorical.
And she doesn't go by Kathy.
No, definitely not Kathy. And it might not even be Catherine at this point. I can't It's not in my brain today. Oh not today, not today. I won't have that information. Oh I'll bring up the book, but I won't hold the information.
But I'm sure there are countless listeners right now that are all so mad at both of us for not knowing whatever book this is.
Yeah, and it was a really good book. And I really enjoyed reading it with her, and we would get to like, oh, did you start it? Or I'm this you know, I'm three ahead of you, or I'm three chapters behind you. It was very fun. We're going to read another one of her books, oh in between, this is embarrassing. I don't even know. She might be mad if I reveal that we read this.
This is it Magic Hour by Kristin Hannah.
Yeah, christ I was remembering a k an age. Yeah, that was awesome.
I know you gave very little information.
Very I was giving plot information.
To almost any book. It's about a girl, Kristin Hannah Magic Hour. Yeah, and then what was the But honly saved you from saying an embarrassing book you read?
It ends with us?
It ends with oh, which became the movie, which became the controversy.
Somehow I had read the book and then I don't know why. It makes me want to cry right now, because I thought I was done with it. I saw it on the shelf just this morning, and I went because we spent a couple of months dialoguing about it after I had read it and then watched it, and then she's like, okay, I'm going to watch it too, and we you know, and then of course we get all the like stories about the lawsuit that was in the conversation and yeah, it got to the point where we both were like, I, I don't want to talk about this ever again. But yet we continued to talk about it for a few more conversations. Uh so, yeah, that's I that's that's that's not high on my reading list. But but that's how we're doing it. You know, we're leading with our feelings.
It's a deeply I mean, it's extremely popular, the.
Book, it's extremely popular, and.
Not that that means anything.
What did I Oh, I watched the movie and then I read book because I was curious how it which was played out. They were very similar to me. I I don't want to say the book is worse, because I know she's I don't want to disparage the author.
I guess I already have.
I think I appreciate anyone who can execute a book. I'm excited based on personal experience. There's just something because it's there's gender roles, and there's we were mentioning how every time they have sex, she seems to say inside she's but that's the main character is going it's inside of me, inside of me, and it just plays out like a very stereotypical strange couple fantasy. And then he's a neurosurgeon and it's just like but to not disparage it, and I think this is part of what hooks me in and why I was interested in it, is there there is a really thoughtful expression of how you can be locked into someone and then how it can become physically abusive. And I think that aside from my critical, you know, critique of it, which is I'm the asshole in that I realize that, but there are there is that part of it where it's very thoughtful and when you're watching it, you're going, eh, it does bring you into that behavior that can make someone have power over someone and and what our expectations are and what we're owed and and why we're intertwined with somebody. And I think that's the parts that I liked about it. And then the other parts. I was, you know, kind of hate liking it.
Right, so she all I know, and this actually might not even be true. She works in a flower shop? Is that true?
That's what you got from and everything you've seen online.
This is my exposure to this is reading about lawsuits and then the like.
Where Floral's at the premiere that piece of business.
Not even that actually, I'm just I'm remembering the like standy or whatever they had at the AMC where you could get your photo taken in what seemed to be a flower shop. But then like I knew there was some element of physical abuse, and I was like, why are we getting a picture taken in the flower shop for this movie? About the domestic.
Other layer to this mess. I mean, I was kind of talking about the work and then you throw on this the press angle of how they were planning on selling it, and.
It's very odd, very odd yep.
But so yeah, the main character, that's her dream. And there's another thing in the book and I was like this, she hates herself and she hates her readers. There's a thing in the book where she's starting. But let's do flowers different instead of making them alive, let's make them dead. But she doesn't make them dead, but she makes them different. Like there's a display where and she's it's a steampunk's steampunk gonna put rivets and dip it in a dip a white rose into black, a.
Dozen roses in a top haad or something. This is horrible. This is too many things going on in one book. Pick one or a couple of those.
You can't go on doing.
Really steampunk flowers, think, So that can't be true.
I hate it so much.
How do you write a book about steampunk flowers? And that's not the biggest problem.
I don't know.
Oh no, no, And now this author has a lot of successful books, right, she's kind of like the top of the right. Now, yeah, she's great, and good for her.
And then also, I mean, now that i've I really want to get off this. There's something that feels bad about it. But now that we're in here, the main character also writes to Ellen degenerate journal.
Wait for some reason.
This is very cathartic and cringey for me to talk.
Why does she write to Ellen? Oh this is now starting. I'm not starting to feel some sort of pity for this character. And I don't know anything about any of it. You means somewhere she loves Ellen.
She loves Ellen.
She doesn't know about Ellen.
Is coming off. She her the main character in the book. Her father was abusive, Okay.
And that's why it's so hard. I mean, these are issues, these.
Are real issues, and she writes about that. Well, it's just the combination of that with the steampunk and I guess it's just like an aesthetic taste thing. But so she tries to, you know, her escape is to write to Ellen because it was maybe the book is set at the beginning of ellen talk show, and at some point the main character is like Ellen, I fast forward through your dancing, which is pretty amazing, but but so yeah, that's her refuge is to imagine that she's sharing all of her deepest things that she's going through with La.
Which is heartbreaking way but then also shocking, especially considering where we stand in ellen history currently.
Yeah, so it's it's yeah, it's a piece of cultural.
Now I want to read this, right, I mean.
I give you my copy all over again.
Does the Ellen thing play into the movie?
No, that's what I was just gonna say that that part did not make it into the movie.
Does she write to a fictional talk show host or anything, or they just don't do that.
They don't do that at all.
Interesting. I would be mad if I went to the movie and she wasn't writing to Ellen.
Yeah. And I think you know the author, Colleen Hoover. I remembered her name. We go and remember Kristin Hannah did I I'm back. I'm back in the book mode, guys. I haven't picked up a book in a few days. She I, because I was. Of course, the onslaught about the lawsuits and stuff. You got to you gotta click on some of that stuff, and Colleen just stays out of it.
Does anything to do with it?
Yeah? Smart? And I think similarly with you know, she made a statement of like that that's there's this is what they want with it, and across the board with the story and the problems with it, which is smart.
She's like, yeah, bad to do with that. She's onto her next book. That's right, somebody's writing.
It really took me somewhere. Wow.
Interesting. Yeah, this whole thing and I can't even remember who's involved in the lawsuit. It's what's her name? And the horrible direct.
Yeah, what's her name? And what's his name? Jason Baldoni?
And hey, how did.
We end up talking about this? Of all things? That's what happens, you know, when you're open to anything.
Sometimes when anything goes, when anything goes, and that's kind of ther you get. We push limits, we push it to the edge, and we remember celebrity names.
We yeah, and then we hop off the edge and bang our heads on the bottom of the pool.
This is another app I wouldn't mind, is having a thing that just shows you a celebrity picture and you have to remember their name. That feels like a good thing for me, for my brain, Like just wake up every morning and try to remember things.
That'd be a fun board game, like that memory game you play when you're little.
But with only celebrities that. I guess there'll probably some copyright issues or what have you. Maybe it could be kind of an off brand or black market. Yeah, I guess you could make that at home, print up pictures, make that at home. You should make that?
Can you and invite me over? And I won't know anyone's name, I won't know who anyone is.
That actually US magazine guess who combined forces. It's called guest US and it celebrity.
You did it.
Oh my god, if they.
Did it, I'm a part of this.
We're in you did it. This is a nice little sign. Now guess we're ready to go.
Let's run with this and at least get them on the horn copyright whatever?
Do you play? Connections?
What is that?
This is the New York Times game? I played this every morning.
No, but I know people.
Fantastic game. This does make me feel a little better about my Not the crossword, No, this one. It's like, give me, you don't know what this is? Like four there are four categories and then they're like, uh, maybe sixteen words I think, and you have to decide which words go with which into which category.
I'm into that.
It's wonderful.
It's less taxing than a crossword puzzle.
Yes, it takes less time and actually, in some ways makes you feel a little bit more clever than a crossword.
Puzzle, and more clever than wordle certainly.
Oh I don't do wordle at all.
See, we got to slow down. Don't get its tax.
Word essentially like playing the lottery or something.
It's just a lot of gane and then not a lot of satisfaction.
It's right, exactly. Congratulations you were able to guess.
Yeah, and now I feel dirty. It's just like I do describing this book multiple reasons, none having to do with the caliber.
Of the Yeah, I was off wordled pretty quickly. I don't know if it was because I was just frustrated, but I just felt like it was dumb. It kind of felt to me like almost like a word search.
Yes, it's like this is I think there are people who are still into it. I spent a good deal of time. I think there was a moment where I was even telling other.
People, you got it took us all by storm.
It took us by storm.
But Connections, I think is playing the long game. I think it's going to it's going to be the one that stands the test of time.
I'm going to get in there.
Yeah, it's a good one. I mean well, speaking of things that make us feel dirty and horrible, there's probably something else I should bring up. I don't know that I even want to, But Marylynn, I was excited to have you here today.
Thank you.
I was.
I'm excited to be here.
I thought we would have a good time. Yeah, talk about whatever we wanted and move on with our days. Yes, the podcast is called I said No Gifts. Yes, so I'll just say I was floored when you burst into the studio. Yeah, you've, by your own admission, received about a thousand emails about this podcast. I'm sure one of them had the title, I.
Mean, everybody wants a gift. You're just when you say that, you're just saying that you're.
Painting me to be a very materialistic person.
Right now, you're telling me you don't want the gift I brought for you.
I'm not saying one thing or another.
Catching you in your own in your own game, and.
I will not be caught. I will leave the studio before being caught.
Okay, you know what. I'm a guest here, and you're right. It said no gifts, and I defined it. Okay, there, you're right I did. I went against everything that you think you want, everything you take a stand for, sneak in the back door, and I'm saying you, wouldn't you like to open a little gift. Wouldn't that make you feel better?
Well? Maybe then should we open it here on the podcast.
I would love that so much. I'm going to get the gift.
Okay, Okay, great, wait, oh, it's right here. I was like, where are you go down?
Fake stairs?
Away? Just vanish.
Okay, first of all, clearly this is a notebook. I got one up for each of us.
Oh fantastic. Oh I'm excited to see where this hads.
So we can write everything we thought about this podcast and a.
Nice to review. Okay, so it's in this brown paper bag, and so should I take out the notebook first? Yeah?
Just take a notebook out. We all have a notebook.
We each have a seventy match notebooks, college ruled notebook. Oh does that feel good? Kind of a bright blue color? And now should I take this out?
Yeah?
Okay, we'll pull this. Oh I'm excited about this already. It's a pair of white sox that I would describe as a mid calf. Is that what this is? It's not.
It's the thing that's exciting. They're not short, and they're not long, and they're from the liquor store.
Yeah, it's going to Why is the should should I keep going here? Or should we talk about this first?
Let's let's talk about it.
This is, I would say, just upon looking at them immediately, is probably the least flattering sock you can wear.
I know, so I agree.
I agree because it doesn't cover it. Like, maybe I should put one on right now.
That'd be great, that'd be terrific. They're almost the right length to be calves. E's right, it's the style of sock I have on right now. But yeah, they're like no brand.
Yours feels a little longer to me. I'll also say that they're white socks but also are almost gray.
That's exciting. It's like a high Does that one look dirty?
Or maybe it's the lighting it. I mean, the majority of the sock is meant for the foot rather than the leg, like that foot ratio is shocking.
The texture looks like maybe a sink scrubber.
Oh this is actually worse than I imagine.
I thought it was better. Your foot fits in there perfectly. Wait, why is it.
Work goes in? But what say about my legs length? What do you do legwise with this?
But don't gloss over the foot.
You said that it was so big but perfect. This is a Cinderella situation. Now what if you just.
Scrunch the top down and make it like a footy with bonus? Oh, interesting footy with an extra. Yeah, that's terrible. It's a terrible length of sopping.
My shoe, and we'll see how that looks.
But I think maybe the scrunch down is the way to go to act like it's deliberate.
If I were in shorts, what would we think of me? Right now?
I'm not gonna lie. That's cute, That's cute as hell.
This feels like if I were wearing like a slightly below knee.
Skirt, which is what I'm doing right now. All right, This feels like, look, I'm just making you dress like me.
I pull out a skirt next denim jacket. Yes, okay, yeah, I wonder what at a last, do we have any idea of what type of sock? This is called cru sock? This is a cru sock, that's my guest. I've always assumed a crusock was one of the ones that goes onto your cat.
Now I see what you're saying. You're you're completely throwing that sock under the bus, and you're doing it in a reverse way by trying to uplift it and say, what kind of suck is this? When you know, damn well, it's a poorly made crew sock.
It looks like a krusock to me.
It's a crew sock.
You're trying to invent a different style of sock.
So what's the calf sock? What does that? What do we call that?
Is a crew sock? This is a bastardized it's.
Just like a sty right, do you agree? I guessed. So then there's like the one that goes up to your that's a knee sock. Okay, Oh, that's a sweat sock, sweatsock. But isn't there also sock?
Oh? A knee sock is what girls wear with their school uniforms and their Mary Jane's sweatsock, same length, made out of thicker materials, what basketball players in the seventies wear.
Right with a strip. So that's a classic song. That's a classic you kind of that's timeless, And there's.
Different versions of that. They're not all not all sweat socks are the same length. So maybe we just call this a sweat sock. This is a sweets a it's trying to be a crew.
Okay, So I actually think that what you have in your possession is called a micro crew, a micro crew.
Yeah, you were right to give the dignity to the sock, because there is a sock category called a mic C.
That feels new. I don't think we were calling this crew.
She didn't want the sock to feel bad.
On Alas is always thinking about the sock micro crew interesting but my crow crew?
Wait, so then does that mean that the crew sock is supposed to go up the calve? Do you have a picture of a crew sock over there?
I feel like this is a cruise sock right here. Okay, let me put this back on. The sock I came into the studio is a gray crew.
I think I'm into the crew sock. For for many a year, I wore footies because that was what was available right in my hastily shopping at Target. Now I go out of my way to get what the crew is. I'm gonna say, is the best kind of sock.
Now we're looking, oh we have a hole? Oh wow, looking at there's eight or nine different all of the types of socks, and okay, socks by heart.
We go.
We have the no show hidden.
I'll get out of there.
Then the no show. So the no show is different than the no show hidden, interestingly, okay, which doesn't make a ton of sense.
So no show it's like it doesn't really not show now bad sock.
Yeah, which is also I believe an ankle sock. I think that's more of an ankle sock. I'll look at the next one. Oh, then we've got the quarter.
Which is like a little bit over the ankle, which is kind of hilarious because you're right. The second one is more of a true ankle sock.
Right.
Then we get to our micro crew, our hero.
Then the crew where microstore sock is the micro crew.
I actually think I'm in a boot boot sock.
Or in a GD boot socks because there's so subtle the differences.
I know, this feels unnecessary boot sock midcalf.
And also this is a it's not really I'd love to see this. But then with just all the examples in the world, oh right, right, like the seventies sock we're talking about.
Yes, there are a bunch of other socks. It could be on this diagram. Thigh highs Yeah, yeah, is that a sock that's more of a boot?
I agree with you.
I'd like a thigh highs song just a white thought.
Crotch sock all the way up to the to the shoulder, to this shoulder.
Okay, tell me why you brought these socks.
Well, I was going to the liquor store to get another item that's in that bag, which was isn't meant to be in the bag, and I saw them and they looked cozy and nice, you know, like a nice thing to touch.
It is a nice soft and this is a good bed sock you're gonna put You're gonna wear those. There's cozy. I'm always in need of new socks. We all do.
And that's a good feeling when you go into a store that you don't expect will have anything and then they're there and they just spoke to me.
A liquor store with socks. That's I mean, that's incredible. Underwear too. They have a full clothing.
Section, no, like an underwear socks and underwear.
So that's for somebody whose life is a mess. Yeah, something's going on and there that's not you yet.
That's not you when I picked that out for you.
It's a luxury sock.
That's how I thought of it. I go into the liquor store and I think I didn't expect to see this here. Yeah, it could very well for someone who is in need. It functions in an Oh, thank god.
That's here, right, Oh, it socks.
And they were like five bucks, which I also thought was a bargain. Great price.
Socks have gotten very expensive.
Because that's like three pairs of socks.
At least three pairs, right, yeah, and they can just immediately go into my wardrobe. I've started doing more of a neutral sock.
Oh this is great.
I love this, great news. I was wearing kind of more, you know, ones with designs for a lot of time, and I haven't sworn them off, right, But a nice gray or white sox.
For twenty twenty five into the neutral socks.
Yes, we need to have a nice neutral into it.
I'm into it.
Are you much of a sock person? I care?
I don't even want to get into it. I don't care, but I do care.
I feel like you've got style.
I'd thank you.
I'd like to have style.
I'm forever throwing things away and starting over and then not knowing and then not committing.
Right to a particular look.
Yeah, I have you. So then right now I'm just doing the white cruise sock.
I think you're right on brand.
I'm into it.
You know, it's twenty twenty five. I've just declared you've just declared neutral sock.
Yeah, I don't think I can commit to I do have some striped socks and some socks with things on them.
But when you have that then it has to really be part of a particular look. That's right. You can't just throw that on with anything. No, but I do you know.
I will say I tend to wear the same pair of black sweatpants every single day.
A fun sock will jass it up. That's true. Take the neutral.
I would go the opposite. Instead of having a whole outfit go with it. I will have a bland outfit.
And something to look at that.
It's also like I start getting my nails done. Oh I like that color on my eyeliners, on my fingers, Thank you so much. Because it also makes me seem like I'm wearing an outfit right when I'm not.
It feels like a choice that you don't you don't even have to make.
That it makes something fancy, like I'm dressed in shitty clothes. And then it's like, wait a minute, she's got class.
Did you see that she buys socks at liquor store? Yeah, what color is that?
That's a It's like a looks like a Barbie pink bubblegum pink.
It's very bubblegum. I like it. Okay, should I get back in here.
Yeah, let's get back in there. I'm really excited about the gifts.
Oh, I'm thrilled. A nice trail mix, simply classic.
That's yeah. I couldn't eat it anymore.
It has absolutely been open, so I can just dive in right now.
Absolutely has been open.
I love a good trail mix. Do you want some?
No, because I've had too much over the past three four days. And I like to think my son was going to get in there, but he he didn't. I ate all the rest of that bag myself, so it's time for you to do the rest of the work for me. Please brand And.
It's great, It's very good.
It's not too salty. It's got a good casual almond ratio. Gonna get get you an eminem in there. The filler of trail mix. Of course, you gotta expect there's they're gonna put too many. It's too easy.
It's the easiest thing to.
Throw the raisins in there. But I I'm excited for you to eat the rest of this bag. And I'm thrilled that you tried it right away.
I had to.
Yes.
The nice thing about a trail mixes it's a good way to get your raisins in.
I've always said, gotta get more raisins in. It's fiber, right.
It's fiber, and by putting that little bit of salt on it, it makes them much more tolerable.
Could you imagine what your parent being the one your parent mom's only mom's pack lunches. Let's be real, that puts the pack of raisins in there. Oh, I was that mom for a moment you put in But I'm not that mom. But I one day I was in the grocery store and I was like, I'm gonna be that mom. It didn't last very long, but I can remember growing up. But who's your mom?
Why is your mom such a loser because of it?
It's like that a healthy It's not no, it's.
Not just another type of candy, except for if no one likes to eat them.
Yeah, that's what it was considered, is like a.
Healthy right of course. And then there was the crazy phenomenon.
They'll still see a crazin in a salad.
You find them in the salad, ye, when you're kind of just chewing them up. Don't need it, don't add anything.
Don't put a crazin, don't put a I'm gonna go back on that. I've had a kio salad with a crazin, and it helps if the lettuce is more better.
Oh ad a little bit of sweetness or a little extra something.
Yeah, I can't fully turn against fruit, but I would say I'm ninety percent against fruit in a salad.
It's like, just make a good salad, don't put fruit, Pick the right vegetables, please, thank you, and make a good dressing. Throw a little cheese in there.
I'm not going to do it at home ever. I always, yeah, I always try to make a salad and it's a bust. This is terrible. I admire anyone who can make a true, really good salad.
Yeah, it's interesting because it seems like it should be easier and then you try. And I think making a good salad requires be able to go all the way. Yes, And when you're making something at home, you don't. You're not interested in going all the way. You're not buying all of the vegetables or chopping them up in the way you should not. Then you end up kind of with like the baby spinach and you can't slivered almonds or something.
Exactly, and then boring, Wow, I got slivered almonds.
This trail mix to me, it always reminds me that I'm shocked, especially now when all these companies companies are doing a billion different flavors all the time with their products. Why Eminem's hasn't done as salted M and M just have a bag of Eminem's and they're coated in salt. Okay, because an Eminem out of a trail mixing.
I mean, I like your ingenuity. I like you seem like if you were the boss there, you'd be like, make it happen by the end of the day. And they're like our hard shell that we've been making since nineteen hundred. You want us to just add salt to that that sticks? You want us sick break the entire recipe of Eminem's. Any Eminem always has the same shell.
What would it? Okay, hose them down and then throw salt on them.
Wow, holos them down and get some salt on it.
By the end of the day, we get a garden hose in the factory. That's all it would take and like a bag of salt. Somebody kind of just.
At you right now. I'm not gonna lie. I got a little bit angry.
You're mad because I thought of it first. And now I'm going to be working up mars m and m or whatever it's called, eminem mars with.
A bunch of melting salty colors all over your hair stuck together, and we'll call them eminem clusters.
Okay, so this is us working as a sea and now I'm bringing you on.
Maybe well, he's a raisin as part of the glue.
Interesting, Now we're going backwards.
We're going backwards.
That's interesting. I wonder if that's ever come up with the company of trying to make a raisin eminem. Oh, that sounds terrible, eminem with a hidden raisin.
I'm interested in a shape of a what do you call that?
With like a cell with all the orbits.
Yes, thank you and Adam, because I'm also simultaneously thinking of what will you want on the chalk Factory the original where he's got that oh god like kind of a shape. That'd be a fun right for a candy to have offshoots.
Yes, have like a chocolate center with a little M and M stuck.
On the house around to something now.
And then a pure raisin center.
You never want to get to the center. I wish I didn't get to that center.
That's when you have to stop. Yeah, I do like a raisinet. Do you like a raisinet?
You can't argue with a raisinet?
I mean, I love her pick a raisin.
Thank you, exactly. I'm right there with you.
But if I'm in a movie theater and a friend has them and they shake it into my hand, I'll eat one.
Yeah, they're fun.
It's probably the best version of a raisin.
It is cover it and damn chalk.
And then you never see a raisin in a salad, although you see crasins. So I think that that's a real clear there's something going on.
There's something happening with the raisin.
If someone gave me a raisin in a like a lettuce salad.
The raisin needs some anti depressants because there's something sound with the raisin.
Has a mood disorder.
You know, the poor raisin. It's it's not really going.
To change mind. Yeah, there's nothing they can do. There's no it's got to be a frustrating business.
To be the yogurt raisin.
Oh, terrible, awful. I'd rather get a yogurt pretzel. Yogurt pretzel there we go, which is essentially now just a chocolate pretzel. Why am I not eating a chocolate pretzel? But you can convince yourself.
What about those dark chocolate ones from uh Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Pretzels?
Oh, I have a bag in my cupboard right now. Oh those delicious, so good. I don't buy them very often because you can't. It's irresistible thing to rest. One of the best things you can eat is a chocolate pretzel. Yes, and it's the right, It's not too sweet. It's really a perfect snack because it's a dark chocolate right, exactly, so nice. That's the trick. Should I get back in here? Okay? There for so many things.
I know, it's really it started ramping up towards the end.
Fantastic.
Okay, So that's the tape that I went into the liquor store for which they did have, but I was sitting in my car with eight minutes to get in here. Try to open the tab and good luck, enjoy that gift because you won't be able to actually open the tape as I wasn't to finish wrapping the gift, which I would have wrapped because I love a wrapping with tape. Go ahead and try to even though there's a tab with arrows on it.
Yeah, oh wow, this tape.
And I said, I'm done with you. This is now part of the gift.
It's literally unopenable. This is we'll say it's a Basik product. This is a basic take. And you see how I ripped the top.
Off to try to get closer, to try to get my hands in there.
It's like an animal got to this.
Yeah, have a version against packaging.
I've never seen that.
I enjoy wrapping the Basic brand. I wonder if that your socks are also that brand.
It's a whole. It's like ACME or something. Let's see here, this is impossible.
I've given you.
You have to exactly how I'm cutting at your fingers when you're trying to get to it. Yes, I would love to open this in front of you, though, just to show you up.
I know I can feel it. I already know that's what you're doing. And then you'd go, oh see, I got it. But really what you meant is see I got it and you did it, that's what you mean.
But it's unopened, worthless.
Now we're back on the same team of not being able to open it, and you gave it more of a chance than I did.
Wow, this is I cannot imagine. Yeah, the basic brand is be a Z went on their way to.
That tab and it's but they didn't think to actually make it a tab.
Wow, this is and I I really.
Think they made a tab that's not a real tab.
No, this is this thing with the arrows is meaningless. That doesn't indicate anything. I wonder if you were to dare I pull it completely open? Well, sure, we're gonnah, and then you've missed the metal. Miss the metal. I wonder if you can take this on an airplane. The little edges there, that's.
My tape that I carry her out for a good luck.
That's yeah, Okay, I'm giving up. I mean, I will say I'm usually not good at opening anything, you know, like a jar.
Now I want to give it another try.
Try.
There's no way. You've just given it so many tries.
And you actually have nails able to think get some traction there. I can feel the edge, but it just is so it's barely there. It's ah, it's barely there, hint of an edge.
I have cat eyeliner all over my fingers from crying from crying about that book. Oh god, I can see it. I can see the edge.
Shouldn't it be satisfying to get that open?
Yeah? It would. And maybe that's the purpose of this, is to just let you not be satisfied and live in that place of zen.
And I'll say that it looks like the liquor store has put a price tag over a price tag. So I wonder if that used to be more and they were like, no one's gonna be able to open this. Cut it the price in half. Wow, it's a useless product, but almost a collector's item. Then that's something you can put on a mantle.
That's right.
So what Paine that can never open?
It's a point of reflection, like a little sand those meditation things.
Or it's like a stress ball or something. You could have this in a meeting at a company. You can just picking at it trying to get it open all day, just stressing out. So walk me through this gift buying process. You got the trail mix.
Okay, the trail mix, I almost brought in the bag of a variety of snacks that was in my car just to out myself, because I was like, this is great. I prefer to eat like this. It's probably. I had also from the Trader Joe's the cheese and crackers, the mini cheese and crackers.
Oh, I've never had this talk about you.
Want to go through the box as you start eating it, you want to get through the whole box. The dried mango, Oh, sure of course. Oh. I had a lot of Trader Joe's items. And then the pecans with the sweet and salty.
Oh I love those, boy, or the sesame cashews. Have you had those?
Yes? Not as often. I'll revisit those. Thank you for reminding me. I don't. I love a cashew, and I think I'm so I'm so partial towards the pecan that I've forgotten about the.
Cast so interesting I've got to get I will revisit.
Okay, So those are my three all. And then I also had a beef jerky, which I did not.
I did notice the beef jerky in your bed, and I get that it's a brand name.
This was all my breakfast and that those were all the items because I could mix and match.
All the ways here saying you've got a little protein.
And then I and then I said, I'm going to give this as a gift because I can't eat any more of that. It's it's too big of a bag for one person, and so to keep eating.
Then you were at the Then you went to the liquor store.
Oh, I went to the liquor store because I thought I'd love to wrap these and I have a few minutes. Let me see if they have tape. And they did, and here we are. There still is more than there's more in the bag that these are not even I think what you're getting item here, this is actually was the original actual gift. It's a real gift.
This is an actual thing that I actually need to explain to me. Yeah, what is this? It seems like a mustache keychain is what my initial guess would be.
Close.
What is It's like a furry little First.
Of all, it's made out of real steal skin.
What Yeah.
Second of all, I'm gonna start writing in your notebook about this. It's from Callowit, Nunavut, which is in the Canadian Arctic. Okay, you take a plane to Toronto, you take another plane to Ottawa. You get on an airline called Canadian North and you from Ottawa go another three hours north. This is from just outside the Arctic Circle.
What Yeah, when were you there?
I was there filming a TV show. See this is real coming in bring in the juice like that bitch talked about trail mix for twee in the car for forty minutes. Now I'm telling you about a TV show that I'm on that.
We How long were you up there for?
For three months? It's a show called North of North which has started to air in Canada and it's airing on Netflix, but it's coming out. If you go to my Instagram, you'll see I've like post about it because and I've started to post about it because it's airy in Canada and I will be doing more. It'll be on Netflix in the spring. They haven't given us a date, but yeah, really fantastic show. I'm really proud of it. I play the white lady on the show for you, and it's about an Inuit woman who is trying to break out of her shell because she's married to the like best seal hunter in the town. Everybody knows, everybody and she's trying to become herself.
Yes, right, right.
And I'm like the Karen gatekeeper, who's you know, sort of like, you don't know. Am I a terrible person? Am I a helper? Do we need each other? Am I a gatekeeper? Am I lifting her up? Am I?
You know?
Heartfelt but ignorant. It's a really cool part because it's not a straight up bitchy Karen. It's it's a Karen with.
Like depth and Karen we all know and love.
Thank you. And my character is married to an Inuit man, so I've lived in their culture for you know, over twenty years or whatever. But but yeah, it was really cool show.
And what was it like living up there?
It was it's it's wild, it's wild.
Just freezing cold all the time.
It's freezing cold all the time. I arrived in March and it was twenty below and by the beginning of June when I left, it was thirty two degrease bahrenheit And that's warm when it's thirty two or thirty three.
And are you seeing like crazy wildlife, any sort of polar bear or anything like this?
What they say is, you know, polar bear hasn't walked in town since nineteen sixty two or whatever. Oh interesting, it could happen, but it's not going to right. And also the way the landscape has sort of now, I can't remember if I think it's a combo of things, because there as soon as you land, you see seal hunters. There's a road where we were staying, and and there's a series of like inlets, so where we're staying is more flat and the city was developed by the military. And I can't remember why. I the polar bears were closer years ago, and now maybe just the landscape has shifted, so you have to go out a little further to do your ice fishing and your seal hunting. And yeah, I don't it's funny now. I don't know, because I've certainly met a lot of people that then go to the territories even outside of where we were. So where we were, it was like there's the town and then there's just a vast landscape, yes, right, And so a lot of people we met were like, oh, I'm from this territory that's even further And I kind of forgot how their frequency of if they're seeing polar bears on the rag interesting And I got to do a dog sled ride.
I was curious about this. How was that experience?
Incredible? Incredible?
Is it? How fast are you going when these dogs are pulling you?
You it's very deceiving because you're sitting there and it doesn't look like it's fast. And then they tell you, hey, hop off the back and you try to run and it's like, oh like you it's it's really hard and you feel like you're gonna fall on your face.
Oh my god.
Then you have to run and catch up and jump back on the sleds. Yeah, they're they're they're hauling.
And how many dogs are pulling you at once?
I think eight or something?
Interesting?
Yeah?
Was it frightening? Do you feel in control of the dogs? Like? Oh, I saw you were a passenger? Or were you the driver?
Yeah? No, no, no, we're not the driver? No no, what did they call that? The the mush musher Ours was led by a dad and then his daughter. I think there was one other person helping. So you arrive, you pull up and you can see them far away, so you've parked, and then you walk down, you trek down. I mean it's all there's no trees, so it's all ice. So you walk down a little embankment and then you get down and all the dogs. There was two teams and they're just chilling sitting outside. They never go inside. These huskies wore wild animals, but yet you are allowed to go up and touch them just like they're they're like dogs, but.
Like like very close to their answers.
Yeah, they're kind of wild, so you're like, oh, it's like they're not scary, but they're a little bit like if you had a wild dog that was just running into you really and it was kind of stinky, you know, although it was cold seat or like kind of like a little dirty, you know, maybe maybe.
They have.
Squiggled around in some seal guts or something, who knows, who knows. No, they were clean. I don't know. I don't know why I'm going down that road. They're they're outdoor dogs. They were very very clean and well kept by their owners. And then and that's their job. And uh, we had the daughter taking us, so we both had sleds. I mean, it's a total tourist thing, but this is their real team of dogs that has been carried down through tradition, so they do use the dogs to go out on the land for whatever run errands.
Yeah.
So yeah, we're passengers and then the daughters in front of us and it's me and one other person.
That's how big the little sled is.
And then there's a kind of a ledge and it's just you know, by a ledge on the back you can stand. And then a person goes in front of us on a snowmobile just to you know.
Because it's sure just to show off, just to.
Show off and be in communication with the other.
There aren't any dangers.
Oh no, I know what it is. We then you ride the snowmobile back, so you sweach.
Interesting.
That's that's how big.
Our group was.
So depending on your group, you couldn't. Yeah, and then you get this sled on the way back. But it's I mean, it's an all day Where do.
You go just further out in the Arctic that's the thing.
Wow, that's the thing that was so amazing because you're your eyes. It's such a vast nothingness that you can't avoid. Yeah, a really beautiful void.
Wow.
I loved it.
And did you have to like bundle up completely?
Yeah?
What are you crazy?
I mean it ended up being fine, but going into it, this was probably the most worried about bundling up. I was the whole trip, just because it's like, then you get out there and what if I'm a big baby and I'm like I'm getting frost bit and you can't like there's nothing you could do. Yeah, every other place I was there was some type of escape, and you definitely are out in the elements. But you know that I knew how to do it by that time. You have a certain amount of socks.
Do they bring up picnic? What are you eating out there?
Nothing?
Nothing, you'd bring your own snacks. Did you bring a trail mix?
What did you bring? Yeah?
I think we had a We had a bar and a little bit of water.
But that's on you. That's where your brain went.
Of course, I'm wondering what was happening the lunch situation. But then you come back at night.
No, I okay, I was exaggerating. It was probably a lot of lies. No one lie all. I mean, I get And I wasn't even lying all day for a for going straight out into the Arctic.
Okay, in this place, the story is falling apart as we speak.
It may have been four hours.
Four hours, that's a long time.
It is.
It is in the middle of it is nothing.
It really is. Wow.
I don't know if I could do it. I don't know how strong. I appreciate that.
And you will look in that notebook. There's a ticket. This trail mix is for you out on the sled. That tape is what's going to keep you on the sled.
You get into a weapon, yeah, defend myself out.
Keychain is for the keys and keep you warm the ski do Yeah, you're gonna get on your hog and take your skidoo out on on on the trail and get yourself some seal to feed the whole family. And by the way, it's instantly normal when you land the seal hunting.
Oh, it's just if I try to tell people.
But I was in such a immersed in the culture that when I came back, I wanted I kind of wanted to share this profound thing. And a lot of people are just like they're interested, and then they're like, no, no.
It's hard to.
In yeah. Right, And if you say something like seal hunting in La, if you even say that phrase.
It's a tough thing to hear out loud.
Yeah, you don't want to say that out loud, but when you're there, you just immediately are like, oh, this is.
This is what they've done culture right.
Centuries and this is how they sustain and will feed up family.
Right with every part of the seal. It's not a Cruella de Ville situation. That's what you're going to start exactly way. But now I do own you're going, yes, seals. What is a pelt seal?
Fur? Oh, and the shape of that is an ulu and so the top it's just the design, but the real thing is a tool that's like a knife for everything. Yeah, and it's a very sharp blade. And so they'll have their frozen caribou is like their sushi. So you can get the carcass and you're cutting little slivers off of that and dipping it in soy sauce.
Did you eat that?
I sure did.
How was it? It was not bad?
It definitely has like a bit of an aftertaste, which I could see, not unlike sushi. Once you get used to the taste, you start to crave it. I did not get to that point with it. And then there was one day because we had quite a few casts and crew, well all the crewmember most of the crew members that are from there or I'm a different territory and one of the ladies you know on the WhatsApp she said, well, I have Walworths if you want to, and I just I was like I can't. Whatever was going on with me that day, I was just like, I'm not ready. And then I never got the chance to do that again.
Right, I don't entirely blame you. That's the thing you have to, I think, prepare for mentally.
Yeah, I wasn't prepared. I should have been because I had been there for a while.
But sure, but maybe just wasn't for it that day. Sometimes you're not in the mood for a reason.
I'm in my room with my trail mix Walrus.
Wow. Okay, Well, I'm thrilled to have this. I feel like I'm gonna get red paint thrown on me. Pete's coming for me. Don't tell anybody what it is. It's our secret. It's our little secret. This will all be edited out the last half hour of the podcast.
You know, if somebody is a fan of the podcast and they want to find you and throw red paint on you, good for them. Yeah, then that's.
That's somebody with a real they've got something, passion, hobby, It's ultimately a hobby.
I want to believe that people that have heard about that on this podcast right now will respect.
I think so absolutely.
And then for the ones that don't, you just lie and say, oh, it's not real, seal skin? Are you crazy?
Who do you think I am?
Who do you? Who are you? And who do you think I am? And how dare you you pull one of those? Just right back at you. You know, I'm gonna a cone of my own energy.
Yes, people.
Go the opposite way, make them accept that.
It, yeah, exactly, kind of force them into my polue system, which, by way of me visit the Arctic. Respect.
Wow.
Wow, Wow, Well, is there anything left we should say about this? It's so soft, isn't it. Yeah, it's unbelievably so.
There's a lot left on the table. But I feel we've said enough.
Said enough. We should play a game. Then, Okay, we're gonna play a game called Gift You're a curse. I need a number between one and ten from you to say out loud, yeah.
You're not gonna pull my card or anything.
This becomes all right? Okay. I have to use that number to do some light calculating to get our game pieces. So right now you can promote, recommend to whatever you want. I'll be right back.
Hey everybody, my name's Marylyn mis Cup. I'd like to promote Kroger Trail makes. Try it out. It's pretty cool. It's yet M and M's almonds cash us. I think I think we've already covered that. Don't really need to plug that. But please please find me on social media. If you follow me on TikTok, maybe TikTok will be saved. Think about it like that. Maybe they'll say, oh, Marylyn's just starting to get followers. We're going to reverse the ruling and we're gonna keep TikTok. We're not afraid of the Chinese. There are friends.
TikTok. By the time this is released, I guess will be done.
Yeah, I sure will. I know, as I was saying that, I realized, I mean, it's on, it's on like Donkey Kong in like two days from now or something.
Unless some horrible person here bies it, that very well could happen.
What a world that we live in, We really don't know like that could happen. Oh yeah, and also I don't even understand.
How how they buy a tour now? How sorry?
How is this a thing with the Supreme Court? Aren't there multiple other ways that we're getting disinformation and we're getting a cat from other countries?
Facebook? Instagram?
Well that's our that's our own. We're doing it to ourselves.
Well, but all these countries are also vulnerable.
So how is it this big stand against TikTok. It's like none of this is regulated and we're getting by bots all the time, So how is this It seems like we're this is where we lose. We're humans going, we're going to pass a law on this. It's like it's done.
It's not gonna protect everybody. Half of our brains are gone.
Half of everything I watch is built by Russia, half of the emotional tie I have to anything I see online? Did you see on Instagram? They're like, we're going to start this was a couple of weeks ago, putting AI.
Users like immediately like racist caricatures of people for.
Things that you like that'll make you feel good.
That's dark.
It's so dark, So that's what it's going to be.
It simply doesn't solve any problem. There was no one was hoping to have a computer friend. No one, that's just like based.
On Hey, it's better for comedy, am I right? Come see me comedy somewhere else? I can't remember. You got a full roster.
Okay, this is how we play Gift or a Curse. I'm gonna name three things and then you tell me if they are a gift or a curse and why, and then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong. Because there are correct answers, you can lose, you can also win. You can also be in between and be kind of just feel bad for the rest of the day. So be careful.
You're urging me to make a strong choice.
Yeah, just be can mess up the name, Okay, I'll be careful of warning. Okay, does that feel pretty clear to you?
Yes?
I mean, who why? There's been a lot of red flags with me. There's been a lot of red flags. I've been we've been coming up to this game, and I thought this might not get like she.
Couldn't get through world literature or a reading comprehension test the author of the book she's reading right now.
They let her really spell out.
The rule die.
Okay. This first one is from a listener named Emily. The suggestion is gift her a curse. You're taking a photo of your family when a stranger offers to take the photo for you so you can be in the picture too. Curse why fuck you?
Micromanagement? Oh you think I want to be in the picture. I'm against that. I'm against the group picture in general. Just leave me alone.
Correct curse pervert alerts say out of our family's business.
Yes, I didn't go quite so far as pervert, but yes, right there with you.
We don't know you. Also, you might be bad at taking pictures, and then we're stuck with your bad photo. There's no element of this that we could trust. They might take the phone.
Run how fast can you run? Yes, exactly my phone.
I don't want you anywhere near me or my family.
That'd be kind of cool if somebody did it and then just threw it over the bridge. Now you have a memory of your phone in the Thames Thames.
That's I support that great?
How great would that be?
You would talk about that for the rest of your life.
And you know what, I wouldn't even press charges because it too much work. I'd be like, give me your ID, let me call the police. Like what it'd be like pissed and then all your rage. Yeah, and you would come together as a You think a photo's gonna make you come together?
No, this is a common animate Yes, who has shocked you and thrown away your device, Thank you and probably helped you. That'd be great.
More people, just takes and rivers.
We need this straight into the Grand Canyon. Yes, okay, well you got one right so far, very good. Number two this is from a listener named Mark. Gift or a curse unpacking boxes you forgot about for a year after you moved. Oh curse, why throw it away? You forgot about it?
It's done, goodbye.
Curse wrong.
No, oh you're going to open it and get sentimental. Oh, here's the tape I could never open. Here's the trail mags, here's the sealskin keychain.
It's a gift. Well, these are great gifts.
This is an excellent every gift I gave you.
Everything you gave me is I will be selling me. I'll be getting on Craigslist and listening ebaying these things. Bag half bag of trail makes Now.
I put my heart in this gift and you.
Know it absolutely, And you went above and beyond. You even tried to open the tape.
But these fails, we both have a notebook to reflect, reflect together.
Remember, but you you did lose this point. It's a gift to unpack a box you forgot about a year. Okay, you might you know your life is being shifted in all new ways. Maybe it's dragging you back into the past. What's an experience.
It's like you're coming to my side. See, you can't even say you're you know that. You know that's not good. As you're saying it, you're like, go back into the path.
Boo when any racket you lost and you're thinking, I.
Look like, let me get her off the You know I did go through a box of photos.
Okay, now you're coming to my side.
I am. I don't know if it was worth it. Maybe my child, but yeah maybe. And then there was a bunch of pictures the nineties, super nostalgic. But also but why.
Because you gotta have that on occasion, a little taste of nostalgia. You need to have it on occasion. I'm back on your side, okay, number three.
You know that's mostly a curse.
Though you're not getting me, You will not get me.
That's a real hard line. That was unnecessary and hurtful.
Okay. Number three This is from a listener name to Rachel Gift for a curse when a child actor is replaced in a TV show.
My investment level in that is low. You know I'm gonna go curse. I feel like I'm I'm gonna go curse. I feel like you're gonna go the opposite way.
You just have kind of no feeling about it.
No, I'm gonna say curse because that if they are replacing that actor, that means they fed up in the first place, and that the show is already tanking and they think firing a child is going to make it better. No, sir, no, you don't do that, or the or the kid has changed their look or aged out. You're done right to be a better writer. Make the child get lost and never come back. That's better and I'm correct and I'm correct wrong.
Sorry, No, Gift. I love when the child gets replaced. They should be replacing the child every scene like they do with dogs. I think that the child, just like you, should be so disoriented by this casting. I'm back children out of the studio, bring the next one in.
You're right, I'm wrong, and I will also, that's very funny.
Madmen classic show. They replaced the Bobby Don Draper's son got play so many times.
That's right.
There was always a little something.
I don't even remember that. That's how much you're correct.
The original one was. Then with children, they all look the same.
They're interchangeable.
They're all just little clones, little annoying clones. You can throw them in there, I say, replace them as often as possible, even with camera changes. Let's say you know it's just a new child, a gift. You got one out of three?
What no, I got two out of three? You're wrong about that?
You got one out of three? You can.
You're incorrect and you know it in your heart, moving on in your heart.
Okay, Well, honlys do you have your thing?
I do? I do?
Okay? Is this is holysts one round of PA like your boy and at least has a great voice onals is going to present one that neither of us is going to do, and we're going to both try and then they're going to give us the correct answer. So what are we talking about here?
Onal's well, earlier Bridger, you mentioned that you were in need of a shower, So this is about when you shower, so gift or a curse? Showering at night.
I'll speak to this. I think it's a gift. I think showering at night is so wonderful. It feels great after a long, disgusting day to be in the shower cleaning yourself off, and then you're relaxed. It's not like the morning shower where you have to end it quickly. You can hop in there and it's more of a let's we're just relaxing. We're not going back to work. We're getting into bed and keeping our sheets clean. I don't do it that often, though, it's more of a little treat the same.
It's a gift.
Am I the same?
I don't do it often either.
You probably do it more often.
We do it tonight and then when we get in bed, right in our notebook.
Oh that's great. But I think there are people who will only shower at night. But I have to do both. I can't start a day without showering, So then am I being wasteful if I'm doing double showers.
I've started a day without showering.
Never in my life.
Are you someone who will get up and get ready no matter what.
Almost make your bed and get dressed. Yes, even like during early COVID, I was like, I would get up.
That's really smart. I aspire to be you, and I would like to I would like to invite myself back on the podcast. And at some point, and when you invite me back, you say, have you started getting dressed in something other than sweatpants?
That'll be a life check in. Yeah, I'm going to call you in the middle of another episode, or.
Am I excommunicating? Just tell me I don't even better care absolutely, and then then I'll do that to cover up. I don't even care.
No, It's very rare that I'm in a I mean there are days every once in a while I'm in a robe until eleven thirty. But okay, for the most part.
Saying that, for.
The most part, I'm like, I feel just better and ready to go, even despite the fact that I rarely have anything to do.
Ever, and what pont are you putting on? Like a gene?
A gene, I will say. On the other side of the day, though, I used to wear jeans up until I went to bed. I would wear my full day's outfit until I was done watching TV and everything. Then I would switch into pajamas. And I've only in the last couple of years allowed myself to be like, Okay, I'm not going out. It's time. Like we're at the point of the day where I'm in the house. Put on something more comfortable, something slightly more relaxing. Okay. I don't know why I had to be ready to go until the very last minute of my day.
That sounds healthy.
You're watching TV in a pair of like dark blue jeans and a tuxedo.
Secret Lives of Mormon, Oh.
My god, I mean this podcast could go for another two hours. You bring up that don't start?
Don't start. I heard you talking about it, and I did. I dipped in there too.
I started watching the show. Did you finish it? No? I mean it's not a well produced No.
But now I kind of I feel like I will get back in there.
It's coming back for another season. I get very far.
But you know, when it starts, there's that lady who I've already forgotten all their names, the one who has got pregnant.
Oh at the very beginning, Oh right, Taylor, I think, yes, yes, uh, we'll see how that show goes.
How far in did she have her baby?
And I can. I can barely remember anything. I remember they go to the roller skating center I went to in middle school. Oh yeah, So that was part of the problem for me is I was like, while watching it was like, none of this seems that exotic or interesting to me because I know this personality, this sort of boring person But then I kind of got caught up in it and we'll probably continue to watch it until it's over for whatever reason. Anally, what's the verdict as far as gift are a curse?
Of course it's a gift. Of course it's a gift.
And I are we back together? I think this has really brought us all back together.
Yeah, I'm so proud of you both.
Grank you.
Yeah, it's a wonder. Nobody can argue against a shower at night, and if they do, they're disgusting. Yes, okay, this is the final segment of the podcast. People write into I said no gifts at gmail dot com, begging for answers. We hope me answer a question. Yes, okay, this says hello Bridger Honali's and audacious guest. Okay, that's interesting.
Wow, we're not back we were back together and that real backslashsh new way this listeners come between a two of us. I have to I have to take.
Pick a team. Our bakery recently received some national recognition. Oh okay, I know who this is. This is well, I will say this is actually a bakery in Maine called The Place Bakery who has now become a listener of the podcast, and they it is a very good bakery. But now let's see what happened.
I want to go there, say no more.
Recently received some national recognition. They were in the New York Times. Congratulations, and people will not stop talking about it. Okay, now I'm starting to feel like this is they're trying to force me into an advertisement.
Well, sure does feel like that.
Validation for our hard work feels great, But we're a very small operation of two humans and it's become extremely overwhelming.
Shark Tank.
National press for a tiny food business is the ultimate gift or a curse. What are some responses I can use to end the bakery talk and move on, Some for ending the conversation entirely, and some which subjects would be great. You'res truly a baker having frequent panic attacks, Chelsea, Well, I don't talking about this is gonna.
Help I know you recognition you're getting right now.
This is going to destroy the baker's got you.
Product placement on every show I work on from here, every comedy sid.
I do you're going to bring up the place bakery, the place baker? I uh, what do we do? I mean my immediate what my brain goes to. If you want people to stop talking about your bakery is get shut down by the health department. Hey, then no one's gonna be talking about your opport. I mean maybe for another week where they're like, yeah, place is overrun by rats, too much salt. Yeah, but how else do you get people to stop talking about your bakery? Start making less good things worse customer service, make the hours a erratic where no one can really they show up, still.
Show up, don't put your dark blue jeans on in the morning.
And if it's in the moment someone won't stop talking about your bakery. Maybe bring up the death in the family.
M h.
We associate that with the with the delicious bite they're about to eat exactly.
Bring in some sort of yeah, the death cake death muffin personal tragedy that will end a conversation pretty quickly. Yeah, uh, comment on their body. That'll get somebody to stop talking to you.
Yeah, put the calories as they're eating it, make sure they know how many calories are in it.
Yeah.
There.
I feel like Chelsea has not put in the work here to stop these conversations on her own. Rather, she turns to me.
Yeah, it's a bit of a humble brag.
Oh it's an enormous I mean what she's done here is insidious. Yes, they've gotten free advertising. Yeah, they've bragged. Brag BRAGSCA called the guests. She didn't know who it was going to be so rude. I mean, Chelsea, the way she owes us for her continued success.
You'd better send some baked goods. All two of you get in that kitchen.
Full day's work. I mean, I mean, it's I mean, it's ultimately unfair and disgusting.
Is she saying we're very happy with the way things are.
It seems like, I mean that would be a gift, because you got.
To learn that you don't want to be.
Bigger, right, So that is a gift. Yeah, Like we're good just in our little thing, making our beautiful pastries. This is all we'll ever need, And this is what success is.
No thank you? You know? Did I have a big house one time? When I made a lot of money on TV? And then the that had a lady in an urn entile and gold fixtures, and I said, ha ha ha, and then I bought the house and then the market crashed and I was no longer on TV. Did I learn from that that I don't need a house? But am I glad I have the experience? Of course, so they got the experience of people wanting them, and then they.
Go, let's make some croissants.
I don't want I don't want it. Who needs a six thousand square foot house? Not me? Mine is like a weird humble brag. But then sad so revealing of oh no, you know what, that's how I learned by doing? Okay, sue me. Do you think I when I'm threatened by the fires and I have no uh fire insurance? Do you know how I got to the place of like, I guess it is all gone? By having it gone? Yes, now I'm not afraid of it. So I don't know how that speaks to the bakery.
Well, what I think is these people need to have a little more gratitude.
Yeah, say we're doing here. Hire some more people.
Yes, turn into a massive franchise. Yeah, where the quality goes down. That all got people to stop talking. Sell it to investment bankers. Yeah, say goodbye to the place.
Don't be afraid of successes. Fear is not a smooth but is a share of his. That we're nice, that we're bigger than our.
Wildest putting the steampunk.
Fla and let it fly, and let it fly. And the next thing you know, you'll be starting a You're going to be the next movie. It's about your bakery.
People be taking a picture in an AMC with your croissants or whatever. You're not knowing entirely what the movie's about.
Blake Lively is going to start.
Lawsuits are flying left and right. Yes, things are being exposed and uh.
Yeah, the gratitude. And it's very hard. I would think it's very hard to make a name. I know from watching Shark Tank in a food industry.
Oh, it's very hard.
So what's the prob.
Chelsea? Don't write back in, don't write back in. We don't want to ever hear from you again. Well, I think we answered, but I.
Do want to try your stuff.
Yes, and I'm.
Sounds lovely and your bakery. I'd love to know what your specialty item is at the bakery.
This stressing summertime crazy. Yeah, we answered the question to write in our books. I've got my socks, my micro cruise micro cruise socks, my keychain, my bag of snacks, and then my unusable tape. Yes, I'm set for life. Yes, what a gift. I know I've had such a wonderful time with you.
I've had a wonderful time. Thank you for having me listener.
The podcast is over. I know you didn't want or expect this to happen at any point, but you have to face reality. I'm not responsible for anything in your life. That's on you. Do what you need to do. I love you, goodbye. I said No Gifts is an exactly right production. Our senior producer is on A Lisa Nelson, and our episodes are beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. The theme song is by miracle Worker Amy Mann, and we couldn't do it with out our booker, Patrick Cottner. You must follow the show on Instagram at I said No Gifts, That's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts. I'm getting and don't you want to see the gifts?
And I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest to my home, you gotta come to me empty. And I said, no gifts. You're our presences, presence and I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me?
