Episode Summary: 

In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, we are continuing the Sacred Scar Story Series during which I’ve had the blessing to interview many people who have experienced some very painful wounds, but then saw God heal and do a redemptive work and bring about beautiful sacred scars. 

Maureen Miller shares about her devastatingly painful wound when she had dreamed of becoming a mother since early childhood only to have doctors report that short of the miraculous, she would be unable to conceive. 

She shares how she coped with her pain and her grief, and how God ultimately fulfilled her dream of motherhood through adoption.


Quotables from the episode:
Everyone has a story about something that has wounded them and caused pain.
My scars have been more emotional scars having to do with the loss of a dream since I was a little girl, of being mom and so looking forward to having children and being able to do all the things that moms love to do with their kids.
I married my high school sweetheart and not long after that we realized we were going to have difficulty conceiving. It was painful to hear a doctor say that short of the miraculous, you will never have children biologically. Those words felt like the death of a dream and cut very deeply.
Having been raised in a Christian home, and having a good grounding in biblical truth and God’s promises, it wasn’t long before I really began seeking the Lord and asking him how he might use this pain for something good and bring something beautiful out of my broken body.
I mourned and I grieved the death of that childhood dream that I had held onto so tightly. There was a season when I shook my fist at God, but it wasn’t a long season.
As I began to delight myself in the Lord, and be real with him, and at times even shake my fist, he can not only handle all my doubts and fears and anger, but he can even pry open my hands that were clenching that dream.
He began to show me that as I prayed with my hands up and open, he could either take that dream away and replace it with something better, or he could grant me that dream in some miraculous way.
As I meditated on the scripture and began to delight in the Lord, it didn’t mean that God would always answer our prayers in the way we wanted them answered, but he would actually fill our hearts with the dreams he had for us first and those would become our dream.
As I mourned then sought the Lord and delighted in Him first, He began to show me that it was his dream for me to be a mom—it just didn’t look like I thought it would.
We have the choice when we are wounded to either turn toward God and seek him or turn away and walk in the other direction.
There was shame because I had to really remind myself that my identity as a woman was not wrapped up in me being a life-giver. My identity came in Christ and who he created me to be.
The Lord confirmed for me that I was “blessed in my barrenness.” Our pain became a catalyst for me to offer sympathy, comfort, and help for those he places in our paths.
I realized I had the ability to minister to birth mothers who chose life for their children, carry them for 9 months, and then give others the greatest gift of life they could ever give.
When God impressed upon me that I was “blessed in my barrenness,” I realized my condition wasn’t a mistake and that God had given me a heart to sympathize and empathize with those who are hurting.
Over time we were able to adopt three children, but we also experienced the pain of two failed adoptions that have their own sacred scars and round out our story.
It’s a beautiful thing when we’re able to hold up our dream and offer it to God and say “Take this dream if it’s not yours, and you have something better, or if it is your dream, confirm it so I can walk it out in faith and joy knowing it’s according to your will.”
Delight yourself in the Lord. Spend time with Him in His Word. Spend time with God in prayer. Surround yourself with Christian brothers and sisters who can really speak into your life and confirm the truth. Know your identity in Christ and surround yourself with people who will remind you of that. Trust that according to Romans 8:28, God will work all things together for good for those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose. 
Journal so you can go back and look at the “stones of remembrance” and you can remember how God answered prayers.
Once I surrender my will and my way, God has the freedom to work His perfect will, in His perfect way, and in His perfect timing. 


Scripture References:
Psalm 37:4-6 NIV “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.”
Romans 8:28 NIV “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

 

Recommended Resources: 
Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories
YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms
Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1
YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2
Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference
Revive & Thrive Summit 2
Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1
Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2
Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian  Writer’s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award’s Reader’s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.)
YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
Free PDF Resource: How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win
Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader’s Choice Award
Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
Free Webinar: Help for When You’re Feeling Blue

 

Social Media Links for Host and Guest:

Connect with Maureen Miller:

Website / Facebook

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Sacred Scars / Order Book The Hem of His Garment / Order Book Today is Going to be a Good Day / Order Book  Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /   Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast on Apple

 

Guest:

Maureen Miller has been married to her childhood sweetheart Bill for 35 years. Together they have three born-in-their-hearts children and three grand-girls and share life on Selah Farm, a hobby homestead in western NC. She writes for Guideposts, her local newspaper, and several online devotion sites, and her debut novel, Gideon’s Book, is due to release later this year.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson

Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:&nbsp;
In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, we are continuing the Sacred Scar Story Series during which I&rsquo;ve had the blessing to interview many people who have experienced some very painful wounds, but then saw God heal and do a redemptive work and bring about beautiful sacred scars.&nbsp;
Maureen Miller shares about her devastatingly painful wound when she had dreamed of becoming a mother since early childhood only to have doctors report that short of the miraculous, she would be unable to conceive.&nbsp;
She shares how she coped with her pain and her grief, and how God ultimately fulfilled her dream of motherhood through adoption.
 Quotables from the episode:
<ul>
<li>Everyone has a story about something that has wounded them and caused pain.</li>
<li>My scars have been more emotional scars having to do with the loss of a dream since I was a little girl, of being mom and so looking forward to having children and being able to do all the things that moms love to do with their kids.</li>
<li>I married my high school sweetheart and not long after that we realized we were going to have difficulty conceiving. It was painful to hear a doctor say that short of the miraculous, you will never have children biologically. Those words felt like the death of a dream and cut very deeply.</li>
<li>Having been raised in a Christian home, and having a good grounding in biblical truth and God&rsquo;s promises, it wasn&rsquo;t long before I really began seeking the Lord and asking him how he might use this pain for something good and bring something beautiful out of my broken body.</li>
<li>I mourned and I grieved the death of that childhood dream that I had held onto so tightly. There was a season when I shook my fist at God, but it wasn&rsquo;t a long season.</li>
<li>As I began to delight myself in the Lord, and be real with him, and at times even shake my fist, he can not only handle all my doubts and fears and anger, but he can even pry open my hands that were clenching that dream.</li>
<li>He began to show me that as I prayed with my hands up and open, he could either take that dream away and replace it with something better, or he could grant me that dream in some miraculous way.</li>
<li>As I meditated on the scripture and began to delight in the Lord, it didn&rsquo;t mean that God would always answer our prayers in the way we wanted them answered, but he would actually fill our hearts with the dreams he had for us first and those would become our dream.</li>
<li>As I mourned then sought the Lord and delighted in Him first, He began to show me that it was his dream for me to be a mom&mdash;it just didn&rsquo;t look like I thought it would.</li>
<li>We have the choice when we are wounded to either turn toward God and seek him or turn away and walk in the other direction.</li>
<li>There was shame because I had to really remind myself that my identity as a woman was not wrapped up in me being a life-giver. My identity came in Christ and who he created me to be.</li>
<li>The Lord confirmed for me that I was &ldquo;blessed in my barrenness.&rdquo; Our pain became a catalyst for me to offer sympathy, comfort, and help for those he places in our paths.</li>
<li>I realized I had the ability to minister to birth mothers who chose life for their children, carry them for 9 months, and then give others the greatest gift of life they could ever give.</li>
<li>When God impressed upon me that I was &ldquo;blessed in my barrenness,&rdquo; I realized my condition wasn&rsquo;t a mistake and that God had given me a heart to sympathize and empathize with those who are hurting.</li>
<li>Over time we were able to adopt three children, but we also experienced the pain of two failed adoptions that have their own sacred scars and round out our story.</li>
<li>It&rsquo;s a beautiful thing when we&rsquo;re able to hold up our dream and offer it to God and say &ldquo;Take this dream if it&rsquo;s not yours, and you have something better, or if it is your dream, confirm it so I can walk it out in faith and joy knowing it&rsquo;s according to your will.&rdquo;</li>
<li>Delight yourself in the Lord. Spend time with Him in His Word. Spend time with God in prayer. Surround yourself with Christian brothers and sisters who can really speak into your life and confirm the truth. Know your identity in Christ and surround yourself with people who will remind you of that. Trust that according to Romans 8:28, God will work all things together for good for those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose.&nbsp;</li>
<li>Journal so you can go back and look at the &ldquo;stones of remembrance&rdquo; and you can remember how God answered prayers.</li>
<li>Once I surrender my will and my way, God has the freedom to work His perfect will, in His perfect way, and in His perfect timing.&nbsp;</li>
</ul>
 Scripture References:
<ul>
<li>Psalm 37:4-6 NIV &ldquo;Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.&rdquo;</li>
<li>Romans 8:28 NIV&nbsp;&ldquo;And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.&rdquo;</li>
</ul>
&nbsp;
Recommended Resources:&nbsp;
<ul>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/3OpAZgQ">Sacred Scars: Resting in God&rsquo;s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted</a>&nbsp;by Dr. Michelle Bengtson</li>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/3sCoqqm">The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms</a> by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories</li>
<li>YouVersion 5-Day Devotional&nbsp;<a href="http://bible.us/r/A57">Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms</a></li>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/3twWnXp">Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right</a> by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals</li>
<li><a href="https://www.bible.com/en-GB/reading-plans/31089-today-is-going-to-be-a-good-day">YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1</a></li>
<li><a href="https://my.bible.com/reading-plans/31151-today-is-going-to-be-another-good-day">YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2</a></li>
<li><a href="https://leanhealthyageless.com/revive-and-thrive-landing-mb/">Revive &amp; Thrive Women&rsquo;s Online Conference</a></li>
<li><a href="https://leanhealthyageless.com/fall-2020-revive-and-thrive-landing/">Revive &amp; Thrive Summit 2</a></li>
<li><a href="https://bit.ly/3mJPixb">Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1</a></li>
<li><a href="https://bit.ly/3to2SJc">Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2</a></li>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZSTP4N">Breaking Anxiety&rsquo;s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises</a>&nbsp;by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2020 Best Christian Living Book First Place, the first place winner for the Best Christian Living Book, the 2020 Carolina Christian&nbsp; Writer&rsquo;s Conference Contest winner for nonfiction, and winner of the 2021 Christian Literary Award&rsquo;s Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award in all four categories for which it was nominated (Non-Fiction Victorious Living, Christian Living Day By Day, Inspirational Breaking Free and Testimonial Justified by Grace categories.)</li>
<li><a href="https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/16633-breaking-anxietys-grip-by-michelle-bengtson">YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety&rsquo;s Grip</a></li>
<li><a href="https://drmichellebengtson.com/breaking-anxietys-grip-study-guide/">Breaking Anxiety&rsquo;s Grip Free Study Guide</a></li>
<li>Free PDF Resource: <a href="https://drmichellebengtson.com/fight-anxious-fearful-thoughts-download/">How to Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win</a></li>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/2zB0e7J">Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor&rsquo;s Personal Journey Through Depression</a>&nbsp;by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Henri and Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award</li>
<li><a href="https://amzn.to/2yMdN46">Hope Prevails Bible Study</a>&nbsp;by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader&rsquo;s Choice Award</li>
<li>Free Webinar: <a href="https://drmichellebengtson.com/10-tips-to-beat-the-blues-webinar-replay-sign-up/">Help for When You&rsquo;re Feeling Blue</a></li>
</ul>
&nbsp;
Social Media Links for Host and Guest:
Connect with Maureen Miller:
<a href="https://penningpansies.com/">Website</a> / <a href="https://www.facebook.com/maureen.miller.393">Facebook</a>
For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:
Order Book <a href="https://amzn.to/3OpAZgQ">Sacred Scars</a> / Order Book <a href="https://amzn.to/3sCoqqm">The Hem of His Garment</a> / Order Book <a href="https://amzn.to/3twWnXp">Today is Going to be a Good Day</a> / Order Book &nbsp;<a href="https://amzn.to/2Vvipro">Breaking Anxiety&rsquo;s Grip</a>&nbsp;/ Order Book&nbsp;<a href="https://amzn.to/2Vus9SJ">Hope Prevails</a>&nbsp; / &nbsp;<a href="https://www.drmichellebengtson.com/">Website</a>&nbsp; / &nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="https://drmichellebengtson.com/category/blog/">Blog</a>&nbsp; /&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="https://www.facebook.com/DrMichelleBengtson">Facebook</a>&nbsp;/&nbsp;<a href="https://www.twitter.com/DrMBengtson">Twitter</a>&nbsp;(@DrMBengtson) &nbsp;/&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/DrMichelleBengtson">LinkedIn</a>&nbsp;&nbsp;/&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="https://www.instagram.com/drmichellebengtson">Instagram</a>&nbsp;/&nbsp;<a href="https://www.pinterest.com/Drbhopeprevails">Pinterest</a>&nbsp;/&nbsp;<a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn92DHzGSZk8psDb2FKazOQ">YouTube</a> / <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-hope-filled-perspective-dr-michelle-bengtson-podcast/id1468018011">Podcast on Apple</a>
&nbsp;
Guest:
Maureen Miller has been married to her childhood sweetheart Bill for 35 years. Together they have three born-in-their-hearts children and three grand-girls and share life on Selah Farm, a hobby homestead in western NC. She writes for Guideposts, her local newspaper, and several online devotion sites, and her debut novel, Gideon&rsquo;s Book, is due to release later this year.
Hosted By:&nbsp;Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Your Hope-Filled Perspective draws on Dr. Michelle Bengtson’s almost 3 decades of clinical expertise as a neuropsychologist to help her listeners regain hope, renew their minds, and transform their lives. With a perfect balance of clinical expertise, compassion, and vulnerability, Dr. Bengtson and her guests purpose to share Biblically-based hope-filled perspectives for real-life issues, struggles, and concerns. Voted #2 in 2022's Podcast Magazine's Top 50 Moms in Podcasting.

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Your Hope-Filled Perspective draws on Dr. Michelle Bengtson&rsquo;s almost 3 decades of clinical expertise as a neuropsychologist to help her listeners regain hope, renew their minds, and transform their lives. With a perfect balance of clinical expertise, compassion, and vulnerability, Dr. Bengtson and her guests purpose to share Biblically-based hope-filled perspectives for real-life issues, struggles, and concerns. Voted #2 in 2022's Podcast Magazine's Top 50 Moms in Podcasting.