Questions, Answers, & Dean's Rap Sheet

Published May 21, 2019, 10:29 PM

We are the most  personal and uncomfortable dating questions today. 

 

When is the best time to tell the person you’re dating that you have kids, have been divorced, or have an STD? We get to the bottom of those tough conversations.

 

You asked...we answer! Dean lets us in on what he expects when he goes full #VanLife.

 

 

And after discussing some of Hannah B’s season of The Bachelorette, Dean tells us about his plans for Paradise, and we hear about his stint in prison!

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Please say, let's start the podcast. Here we go, Hi, Suck Good Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jarrett and I heart radio podcast. Guys. Oh, I was just about to welcome to another episode of help Dean Stucks at Dating. I'm still in Montreal and apparently my audio quality is not that great according to Dean, but I think it's just perfect, Dared, how are you? I'm doing wonderful. How's everybody else doing? Mark Easton? Gentlemen, Oh fine, thank you very much. Thanks for asking. Yeah, we never ask you guys. I feel bad you're here. You guys are really the heartbeat of this podcast. Vanessa, Dean and I just we're just in the background where the brains, lungs and the heart of the podcast, and we're like the spine and the bone structure where the vital organs, you guys are the things that provide stability. Oh okay, Oh that's a good analogy. That's nice. Just came up with it on the spot. Pretty put of that one. That's pretty good. Well. Today is pretty much a question and answer podcast. There will be no guests. It's just us five having a nice little Q and A session with ourselves and you guys, of course, because you are the ones who provided us with the questions. They will be all relationship topic, mostly about Dean going to Paradise or not? Is that what our podcast is about? Well? Can we get to them sometimes? Can we start with the van thing? Well, you want to start with the van thing? I mean I kind of kind of do. Yeah, of course. Well, for anybody listening, you probably already know that Dean this summer has ambition to move into a van. Not ambition. It's coming to reality now and Dean, you're gonna be living in a van during the summer. When do you have to move out? Have you moved out of your apartment yet? Jared? When do you move into the van? Jared is more critical of this adventure anyone I've ever met. I'm not critical, I'm more nervous for you. Living in a van is very nerve wracking. I feel anyone can live in a heavy on the scrutiny always coming from Jared. I'm not saying you can't. I just get you know, it's living in a van. Do you know where you're gonna park your vantage? He doesn't already shower, So it's all good. So this is this is what I think that people don't understand about the van thing. I'm not living in a van in Los Angeles. I'm not just gonna be like parking it on the street and on side streets in Los Angeles living out of it. The purpose of the van is so I can drive it to national forests like Yosemite, Redwood Glacier National Park banf in Canada and and hike for extended periods of time and explore those areas while living in the comfort of an essentially a mobile home. Well, I feel like you're gonna find your the love of your life while living in this van. For you, wouldn't that just be the greatest thing in the world? Or maybe the van maybe that well, I don't know how that would have worked logistically speaking. Well, logistically speaking too, If you're going to be taking this van on long excursions, what does that mean for this podcast? Are you going to drive back weekly? We need to figure out exactly what that entails. Vanessa records remotely in Montreal and you complaying about her audio quality and listen, I just think she sounds better with the microphone today she's on the headphones. We're just trying different things. We're trying to see you know what works better, But Dean, I want to know. So wait, you posted stories of um you have a fan. I think now that's put into your van and let's talk more about before we get into that. So I do move out of my house this week full time. I'm moving into my van. Today's Tuesday, recording this podcast. As of Friday, all my belongings will either be donated or sitting in my van. I'm going to give my car to my friend. I'm going to keep my motorcycle at my old house. Um, so that's when it starts, and that's what I'm gonna Basically, I think I might like head over to Arizona because it's kind of cold in northern California and over in Colorado right now. But yeah, I I spent the past about six or seven days working on it. My father flew out for a couple of days. We worked on that for a little bit together. Awesome, good bonding time. Yeah, I suppose. Uh we got a lot of work done. We uh we We basically built a bed frame for it. We built a bunch of shelves. It's got a kitchen sink, it's got running water, it's got a cute little dormat there are some things I still need to do to it. I just got my solar panels coming tomorrow, so I I have to install the solar panels. Um I'm getting like a diesel heater installed. I have to put my toilet in there still. I have to put my refrigerator in there still. So how much are you spending right now on your van? How much did it costs you versus how much are you spending too much freaking money? I was actually just talking to my friend Alex today about how because he works at a car dealership, and he was like, hey, I can help you get a Sprinter van And I was like, no, no no, no, I found this one in Colorado that I'm gonna get the one that ultimately have now. And I paid. I mean we're looking at plus or minus like thirty dollars. Yeah, and the van itself costs, you know, like twenty seven thousand dollars. And I could have gotten a very similar van that had a little bit less work for significantly cheaper, but I was like dead set on it. And once I make my mind about something I like, I follow through with it, especially proven in Paradise Mercedes. Yeah, I kidding, Mercedes. I'm gonna kidding. I'm kidding. No. I think some of my criticism comes from it's not criticism because I don't want you to do it. I think two things. One, it's a it's hard for it's nerve racking because it's unknown, right, you don't know what's going to come from it. I think I'm a little scared for you. And then furthermore, secondly selfishly about the podcast. You do these long excursions. You know I want you in studio with me. But I mean, Vanessa does a great job from Montreal. I don't see what the difference would be if I were doing it from your semi year from Utah, from Colorado, or from Wyoming or Montana, all places with great WiFi. I understand his WiFi. Essentially, I don't even get a hot spot. Yeah. So if so you spend like brand on this van, why not just buy a six thousand dollar RV that's got all that stuff in that you don't have to add a bed frame. The car of the van is it's much smaller um and you you want smaller. Yeah, compact is good in the sense where you can go more places with it, it's more fuel efficient. Um, it just looks cool in my opinion. What colors the van, It's like an army green. I thought it was black. Now the hood is black, but they it is green. I saw it online too, it did look black, but Minton Green's out it's out front. If you guys want to take a look at it, I'm a look inside. But yeah, there are still a few things. I have to have to build drawers. Still, I have to install my induction stovetop. I mean, these things can get pretty nice, you know. If you put enough effort into it, you can basically make it like a small apartment. And that's another thing too, where it's like I want I want to be able to drive around, travel around and visit all these So when I was little, I had this idea that I was going to see as much of the world as I possibly could, right, And then I went ahead and went to college. I went ahead and got a desk job, and I didn't do anything that I called myself I was gonna do when I was ten years old. And so now I'm like, Okay, if I take a month and a half off and travel to Europe, I don't have to worry about a house that I'm paying rent for because I'm just living out of my van. You know, So that's a big How are you going to get to Europe with your van? I'm gonna fly to You're I'm saying, like for like a like a regular trip. Have you seen shitty Chitty bang bang? You know how the van the car goes. I have a question. You posted a really cool thing on social media on Twitter on Twitter on this ultimate road trip that literally takes you all over the world. Yeah, so I was sorry. There's a dotted line from like looks like Argentina to the tip of Africa. Is that? Is that a that can't be a ferry like a cargo ship? Is it? Really? So you can put your van on a cargo ship and get to Africa and then you can go all the way to Asia. So I've spent the past couple of days researching this quite a lot, and I've actually reached out to a few people that have done this trip. Um. I would basically do the loop where I go north the Pacific, northwest into Canada, down through the Rockies into Mexico, all the way down to Argentina and then get my car ship to South Africa, drive up north into Europe east all the way to the eastern points of Asia. That would take me about twelve months. But I feel like, I feel like it would cost less money to take an airplane and rent out an airbnb. Yeah, but where's the adventurous spirit in that. I mean, that's like it's not it would be that expensive. The expensive thing comes with like visas you have to get like this, uh this this something to passage in order to like bring cars into other countries. There's a lot of like there's a lot of um logistical things that go into planning something like that. But I'm like, look, I have this car. I can it's self self contained, self sustained. I can live in it right, Like it harnesses energy from the sun. Um, I think, I don't know, it would be a cool thing to do. It's a solar powered van. Well, I'm gonna have solar panels on the top of it, like that feed electricity. It's a hybrid van. No, it's a diesel at van, but I'm installing solar panels on it actually tomorrow that power all of my internal electricity, like my water pump, my refrigerator. It's like a Superman my television. Yeah, I'm sorry, what did you say, because from the sun like Superman. Yes, my van is Superman. Superman is the Supervann is just now hitting me. Um so yeah. So that that we need to figure out what exactly we're gonna do with the podcast. I'm just gonna record from the road. Are there places that you can park your van that are safe? Yeah? Jared is so concerned for you. I mean most BLM places you can park it are safe BLMS Bureau of Land Management. You can essentially just park it anywhere. Although I did just buy a gun. Oh god no, well in California, but I mean that hat left. I've left the podcast. Last week went to a gun store and bought the gun. I can't pick it up for three more days. It's a ten day waiting period. But to do a background check, do a background check, I had to do a written test. I picked it out. We couldn't give guns out like that. I picked out a nice clock nine millimeter. Have you ever shot a gun? Yeah, a couple of times. But that's why, because if you like, you're concerned about safety, so you have it with you. I thought I thought a lot about it. I thought that I'm probably not gonna put live ammunition in it, but I would put like blanks in it, so I could just like FID like warning shots essentially. Right, Well, but now you're giving away you don't announce that on the podcast. Pretty sure that people listening to this podcast aren't going to be the ones that are ultimately gonna be robbing me on the side of the road. Don't ever underestimate someone, especially our listeners. So so, yeah, that's that's my van adventure that's coming up in three days now. Have you invited any female guests into the van yet? Well, I'm not even living in it yet. Come on, I don't know. I mean maybe you know. I think I have to wait till I get the toilet installed before I can start having guests over. That's you also talked about having a gym membership, so when you could use the facilities, shower, all that stuff. Is that still on? Yeah, the table Planet Fitness has like a bunch of locations all across the US, So I was talking too. If I were like an extended droad trip like that to South America and beyond, um, like once a week, I would stay in like a hotel or something like that, so I could have like hot running water, um, that kind of thing. Oh my, it would be so fun if you travel from like state to state or country to country, and then you do like a little episode of going on a date with someone, like traveling to Mexico, you know, like we're going to Paradise. Actually think I thought about Hey, come on, I actually think I thought about that before. When I was traveling through Europe last year, I was like, I should go on a date in every country I visit. The television I thought you were supposed to do that at one point when we're when you were you were calling in from. I don't know where you were, because it's not really where My price, my priorities don't really go on taking people on dates when I'm traveling, you know, And I think after a while, who the women catching onto this would tell themselves, why would I go on a date with someone who I know it's not gonna go where he's just doing it for a TV show and then he's gonna go on a date with somebody else. I mean, look at us. I mean that's that's the concept of the Well, the whole concept of the show is also that you're going on dates to hopefully find your person, where you would be going on dates just for the experience of, well, what is it like to go on a date with someone in Arizona? Next up Colorado? True? You know, I guess like fun date spots. But speaking of dating shows, have you guys watched the Bastareat? I didn't watched this week's I have? Have you? I know you don't watch the show most most of them, right, I watched last night's episode. I just find like the like night one is always really interesting because you get to meet the guys and like the first awkward conversations are you know, always like entertaining to watch, and then the last two episodes are really fun too, so like the middle I get like, I still get a little bit of anxiety. But I did watch last night for about an hour. There is one guy, can we just talk about that one? I think his name is Luke. That's yeah, I mean, very good looking. But also, can you really be in love with someone after a day and a half or two days and meeting and meeting them so much? I did see the video clip on Lauren Zima tweeted out about how he said he was falling in love with Hanna. After the second group date, Yeah, pretty much what happened. They were on a group date where the guys had gone stage and do these different talent things and the first one was like the strip show and it was very gimmicky, and then the later portion was like a talent portion. Some guys like John Paul Jones wrote I think like a unicycle uh. And then you know this guy Jed played guitar, and then Luke p went up there to showcase his talent, which apparently was to tell Hannah that he was falling in love with her. That was his in front of everyone, in front of everyone on the first group date of the season. I thought you said you'd watched the episode. No, I only watched the second half of it. So I was out for dinner. I had a double date last night and we yeah, yeah, and we came back and it was like ate something. So the show ended forty five minutes after. But there was that that was weird. And then there was also when the ABC cam guy came on during the group date and he wasn't Yeah, he wasn't invited on the group date. At the end of the day, it's like it's the producers had encouraged him to do that, right, Well, yes and no, I think, well, I want to talk about the luke p thing, and I do want to talk about the camp thing though, But while we were talking about LUPA, I do want to ask you guys that question. First group date, the guy said he was falling in love with Hannah after probably knowing her for I don't know, an hour, maybe something along those lines. Now. One of his reasonings why his feelings were rapidly progressing was he said, while watching Colton season, his feelings were already growing for her, so he felt like he knew her when he first met her. No, No, that's weird. Yeah, that's very I would I would be weary if I were Hannah, like, are you on? Because he saw me on another season and you have this idea of who I am and I feel like that's a scary. The scary part of when you're dating someone new, you have this image of who they are in your head, and if they don't reach that, you know, all those qualities that you assume that they have, then it's it'll fail. I think he's saying what he thinks he Hannah wants to hear, and so by doing that, he's like, um, I don't know he's he's lying, lying all right? Um? Yeah, I agree. A lot of people were making the argument, well, so many people say I fell in love with them at first sight. Love it first sight. I think when people say that, it's more infatuation and then it grows into love. Because by saying it's love at first sight, I don't think you're giving the justice to what love actually is and how impactful and empowering it is. Um. I think I think love at first sight too, is something that you can look back on and be like, yeah, I was love at first sight. But you don't see someone you're like, damn, I'm in love with you. You know what I mean? Something it's like some of the hindsight of recognizing, but it's not something you can feel really in the moment. I'm sure what the exceptions, but um sorry, I feel like Nick actually funny enough? Sorry, Vanessa how a funny tweet the other day about how uh what did he say something about how Luke's telling Hannah what she wanted to hear. Um no, he said, I'm not surprised that Luke's talent is telling Hannah and that's exactly funny. That's really what it blows down to is he knows that's exactly what she wants to hear. I agree. I think one of two things. Oh yeah, she was did you watch she was eating it up. She said that she believed him, that she believed his feelings, and that she was feeling very strongly about him. Yeah, it was a little bit of a moment um. I think one of two things. I think one, either Luke p is a is a liar and wants to tell people what they want to hear. Or two he's just young and doesn't really know himself and he's twenty four. I think that's the other thing. Yeah, don't forget Hannah's twenty four. And I know age is just a number and things are different in all areas of the country about you know, demographic of how old someone is when they get married and so on and so forth. But for me personally, in my experiences and in my opinion, I think twenty four is very young to be engaged and married because there's a lot of individual growth that I think someone still needs to go through. And so that's why a lot of these guys are a little bit younger and Luke p I believe it's twenty four, but he just might not really know what it means to fall in love of someone, so like when his he has this infatuation towards someone, and especially as we all know being on the show, the Bachelor and Bachelorette are built up so highly that they almost seem unattainable, that he might be like, oh my god, I'm already fouring falling in love with this woman, especially in the like bro Settle, especially in that environment too, because um, all he's experienced over the past five days leading up to that was the producers and the people around him always like re establishing and reaffirming how awesome Hannah is, which she is. But like when you when the people around you consistently build up someone that you're pursuing, then you start to think like, oh wow, this person really is amazing, uh, And that's how you can start to be like start to feel those things. I suppose like in his defense, I agree, I'm not defending him, neither of you, but I also think, like you said, having all the other guys surrounding you build this one person up, it's a competitive environment. You can't ignore that Luke Lupe seems like a competitive guy. And don't ever underestimate trying to get an advantage on the show, not not not not even consciously, but subconsciously saying, all these other guys are vying for this one girl, how can I stand out? I think I'm falling in love with her. I'm going to tell her. I will say when I went on my first my first one on one date with Nick was very early on. It was the second one on one date. I had one group date and then I had one on one And on my one on one, I remember like I was really falling head over heels for him, and there were certain things that he did that made me feel special, like wait around for me after the date or before the date, or you know, after the zero gravity experience, like make sure that I was feeling okay, Like he was very attentive to my to my needs, and those are the things that I appreciated about him. So I had a reason to really fall for him. If you know at the beginning, when I was having one on one time with him during our group it's what is it like, max fifteen minutes if you're lucky to have that much of a conversation with the lead. So it's really I don't understand how you can say that you're falling in love with someone, Like being in love and loving someone are very two, very different things. I agree. I'm with you on that one, Vanessa. And and then you wanted to talk about Cam for a minute, So that was weird. Um, I don't know how that would go down in on The Bachelor with a group of women. If a woman wasn't invited on a group data, then she just miraculously shows up to, you know, towards the end of the night where people are trying to get the leads attention. That was weird. And I also feel like he probably had the idea. He looks like a go getter, so I feel like maybe he thought about the idea told producers, and producers are like, oh yeah, let's turn shut up. And you see someone like a Corin or a Crystal doing something like that. Yeah, I agree with Vanessa that listen. It's not like he broke out of the house and ran into the group date. He got dropped off by a car. Obviously, he probably went to production and said I can't believe I'm not gonna have a date with her. This sucks. I'm not going to see her. And then maybe they're like, well, do you want to try to crash the group day? Sure, let's do it. And I gotta be honest, if I was Cam, I would have done the same exact thing, because absolutely, I'm not gonna because it comes down to this for me. Now, I'm not saying I like him. I'm not saying that at all. Poor Cama don't like him. I'm just saying his character on the show. I don't like the way they're portraying him. He seems a lott, obsessive, weird and I'm not doing that. But I also was wondering last night watching that if it was anybody else but Cam, any other guy say it was like Jed, anybody but Cam? ABC? Did you watch last night? Did you hear about the ABC comment always be Cam, always be cairing that's stupid, um. But it was making me think that if Jed was the one who crashed the group date, would it be perceived so badly or would it have been perceived as a romantic gesture saying hey, here for you. Because here's the thing about the show. Sure, you want to respect the other guys. They're absolutely having said that. If you have an opportunity to go on a group date and see the girl that you want to develop feelings for, and you say no out of respect for the other guys, the question that would come to me is, while you are you there to respect the other guys? Are you there just really find if you can see if there's feelings for this girl. I'll you. I'm not saying they're mutually exclusive, but at some point, if you have the opportunity to see her, I don't think I turned that down. I don't think i'd say, hey, no, I don't want to go because I don't want to piss the other guys off. To be fair, screw the other guys. They're very nice. But if I have an opportunity to see her, I'm gonna go see her. I don't know. That's my opinion. We should take a break. Gentlemen and lady wouldn't talk about zip recruiter. Great. As we all know here on this podcast, hiring used to be hard. Not anymore, though, you want to know why? A little a little website called zip recruiter multiple job sites. Guys, do you remember how difficult it was. There was multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, there's a confusing review process. But today zip recruiter makes hiring easy and all you have to do is go to one place to get it done. You know that place. Zip recruiter dot com slash date date. Zip recruiter sends your job to over a hundred of the webs leading job boards. DJ kellard this commercial. Please do hype me up. But guess what mark? They don't stop there. With their powerful matching technologies, zip recruiter scans thousands, not hundreds, but how many of resumes to find people with the right experience and invites them to apply to your job. As applications come in, zip recruiter analyzes each one in spots spotlights the top candidates, so you never miss a great match. Do you ever miss a great match? Never match? Zipp recruiter is so affected that four out of five how many of employers who post on zipp recruit to get a quality candidate through the site within the first day four hours? And right now our listeners can try zip recruiter for what was that guy's free Free guys at zipp recruiter dot com slash that's zip recruiter dot com slash and at one more time zippc dot com slash. You can try zippercruiter for free today, Jared Haven, here we go late as Mark one. Oh man, that was great, guy, It's not gonna lie. We need to start doing that more often. I hated that so much. Alright, So I know we're not a Bachelor recap podcast, but obviously we're all on the show, so U when it's on, we like to talk about a little bit. Plus it's a dating podcast. Um so one last question to do with the Bachelor has to do a Dean Deanie Baby sin right next to me, the ever sexy and beautiful, kind, sweet, heartwarming, honest, endearing Deanie Babies Dean uh any update on whether you want to do Paradise or not? Not so much if you're doing it, but whether you'd want to. I'll tell you what. There's four people on this podcast right now, five in total, discluding me. Let's put it to a vote. Okay, great, who votes? Yes? Everyone? I vote? Yeah, yeah, that's how I vote. Yeah, it's like, hey, big yes for me? Great, So it sounds like unanimously it's four against one. Is that a binding vote. I mean, yeah, you're going now. I was just curious. I want you to do it because I don't want you to look back and say, why the hell didn't I do it? Yeah? My I don't know. My thing is, it's like, is anyone gonna want to date a guy that lives in a van? You know? Yeah? There we go? You got one. Yeah, I guess it's good. That's all you need is one. Um. Well, obviously it was uh spotlighted a couple of months ago where you were talking about bachelor relationships how they all fake, So they're fake if you has your Yeah, have you said your mind at all? Do you that? I know it was a little the context of what you were saying was a little skewed as well. That definitely factors into my decision. Your phone, what is that? That definitely factors into my decision a little bit. Why don't you be a professional and be a professional. And you're staring in this little mirror while you're talking in the mirror during the podcast, we're gonna call you out. I'm I'm talking here though, this is how I focus. Are you talking to yourself in the mirror? You trying to hype yourself up. I don't know what I'm doing. Um. Yeah, when I when I said that years in actually and Ashley's relationship was fake, you didn't say that that's why I met. I'm just I'm just kidding. Yeah, I said that a while ago. I said that back in January, after I was a little heated about some stuff. Um, and so now I would feel a little weird about going back onto a Batchelor's show. So that's kind of like working in the in the CON's column. Um, you could drive the Van de Porta Viarda. I mean that's kind of good. Hell did they let me and they pay for my gas? I'm freaking there. I don't know if I really want to be in a relationship, like not just with the Bachelor person, but with anyone in general. So, like, I feel kind of guilty going on a dating show without the intent of like dating. I I do sometimes fine, though. There's so many people that say they given up on dating and not getting that they don't want to be in a relationship right now, and then it seems coincidental sometimes that they meet someone that they're ready to commit in a relationship with. So it's just food for thought. I have a question if you met a woman who also she shared your views. I want to see the world. I want to see it in a van. I don't want to pay rent, I don't want to do anything. I would love to live this life as well. And her getting in the van with you and driving around the world. Is that your dream concept or your nightmare concept? I don't think I really want anyone with me. I thought, you know, it's kind of like a just a me thing and me and my dog thing. I guess it's kind of the appeal of it. Um. Maybe I don't know. I don't know. It's kind of that's where my head's at because it's like there's a lot of I'm basically opening a door that leads into the unknown, right, and so it's kind of like, well, how do I plan it for that if I don't necessarily know how it's going to be for myself. Um, And so it's like paradise is great. Sure, I know for a fact I wouldn't be as idiotic ause I was last time around, Like I've been around the block a few times. As kind of crappy as it is to say, I also want to say I don't think you're idiotic last time, Well, thank you. And maybe it's like the post show, I was maybe a little stupid at time. I didn't see that, so I missed that one. The point is, it's like I could go back and um methodically make good decisions, right, Like, I don't know that I've been understaying true to yourself. Right, I've been around the block. I know what to expect, I know what to do if I like, if I wanted to go back. But at the end of the day, it's like, do I want to date anyone? Not really? And if I'm not like super gung ho about finding a relationship with someone, maybe I'd be taking the spot of someone else, that is, by going down. Well, I will say what I find appeeling about what you just said. What many men don't want to admit to is that you're not ready for a relationship. And I think that's so healthy that you understand that and you acknowledge it. I'm not ready for a relationship. Well, well, you don't want one? I mean the same thing, right, not what you don't want one. That means you're already to be in a relationship. Maybe he'll never want one. Maybe maybe he's the guy doesn't want one. I think that actually there, you'll never want to be in a relationship dance. I don't know. There's nothing wrong with that either. I mean a lot of people have come in this podcast since and and said that, you know, human beings sometimes aren't meant to commit themselves to only one person for the rest of their life. It's not even of multiple people. I just like have no interest in Like I don't know, Like it's not like it's not like I don't want to date one person because I want to go around like gallivanting and having sexcapades across the country in the world. I just don't want to date anyone because I don't want to. Hey, it's kind of unfair to the person I end up dating because like, I'm gonna be gone for such a large portion of the next twelve months. Again, you guys, I'm letting you guys down in this situation. Now, imagine if I had a girlfriend in the same situation. Are you going into this van life because you're that afraid of being in a relationship, So this is a way for you to be Like, there's no way for me to be in a relationship. Now, this is my big my biggest excuse I can't be in one. Maybe like subconsciously, I don't think so, But maybe maybe I'm just trying to make myself as undesirable as possible and that if I find someone, then I'll know that they're really in it for the real reason. We can all agree that you're not the typical guy who's gonna date somebody for three years and then propose they're gonna have a beautiful wedding at a church, and then you're gonna have kids. After about two years, and another couple of years, you have another kid, and then you're gonna buy a house somewhere and have a job. You know. That's you write the traditional path and me, yeah, it's the typical path. That's not your path. No, yeah, I think no, Dean. I remember you and I having this conversation and you said you wanted kids. Yeah, I surely do. But I mean, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna have kids with someone that I'm not fully convinced that i'm in love with. Yeah, you want to have kids with the right person. I'm not going to feign interest just for the sake of conforming to the idea. Of what I'm expecting to do. Yeah, well that's smart, that's very smart. Um. And that kind of boils back down to what I said back in January about all the relationships being fake is people will fake relationships for the exterior I guess benefits that come with it, right, their ulterior benefits that come with it. Um. So that's kind of where I'm at with Paradise. I shut the door on it for a while. I've kind of creaked it back open a little bit again. At this point, I'm sure the producers are so sick of me that they wouldn't even want me to come back. I'm jerking them around, They're drinking me around. It's just a big old circle jerk. Um, that's the proper term, right. Yeah. So like, look like even if I want to the preuser, I was like, hey, actually I want to go on Paradise this year, I don't know if they would be like, all right, that's fine, because I've you know, I've been kind of wishy washy with the whole thing. Um, I'm sure they understand why you kind of had a traumatic experience going through the first time. So I mean, to an extent, who the hell knows um wells paradise could happen, it might not happen, but it might happen, but it might not um. I I was far more. I'm glad we asked because it kind of took this into an in depth look about where you are in terms of relationships, not just paradise, which I found very compelling. But we do have emails. We did promote this as a questions or podcast. We have some questions that people want answered, and it's always our favorite part. Uh So we're hoping to get to a few right now. If Mark, you'd be so kind, would be my pleasure. Here's Julie. I'm twenty four. My boyfriend of three years broke up with me because of religious differences. I'm a very liberal Christian with a moderate conservative family. He is a super liberal atheist. I always thought it was okay too, was gree to disagree and respected my parents, knowing they would respect us back. When we broke up, he told me that I was a coward, a little girl, and a phony for not for not standing up to my parents about my differing beliefs, and that I should have distanced to myself from them. I sometimes wonder if I should have taken more of a stand on the hot topic issues and differance to myself and my family more. I still cry off and about our breakup and even feel resentful towards my family because of it. Is it wrong to agree to disagree? Am I really a coward and a phony for not distancing myself from my family for him? Oh? My god, No, I don't think. Okay, can I start? Yes? That I had like a huge reaction over FaceTime. I so I am dating someone. I am Christian, My boyfriend is Jewish, and we have this conversation before getting into relationship, and I said, listen, I don't want to date so one that is just Italian or just Christian. But I want to date someone who will be open to my beliefs, my traditions, my religious beliefs, and same goals for him. And so we have that conversation, and I think it's important if you're dating someone and they have a different religious belief you shouldn't have to change who you are in order to get married to them. Why do you have to change a part of who you are in order to permanently be in that person's life? Right? I agree? Yeah, I agree? I think it comes down to what Julie believes, you know, or ex boyfriend. Well, what I'm saying is he criticized her for not taking a stand against her parents. Does she believe what her parents believe? Because if so, why would she ever take a stand? Well, she says she's a very liberal Christian and conservative family. So what sounds like there are some differences there. They're in the same realm. I would I generational to me, Yeah, I think it's I think it's ridiculous to call her a coward or a phony because a little girl. Yeah, that's I will say. I think that her situation is a little bit different than yours, Vanessa, where you're you're Christian or Catholic dating a Jewish person, so you're both religious. She's no, we're not. I mean, but it's very it's a different type of tradition. People have a faith, right, So this girl at this Christian and her significant other was atheists, which means there's less there's a bigger gap there, I guess. Um, I personally don't think that she should take a stand against her family unless she firmly believes otherwise. But you can still take a stand against their beliefs and still have a close relationship with them, I would assume. I also think that sometimes in this world it feels like we have to always say our opinion and always be like, this is what I believe, and this is what you should believe too, and and and this is how I feel. I'm so passionate about it. And sometimes it's probably better just to be quiet, that's a point, and to keep your opinions to yourself. Because fifty years ago, I mean to a dean is shaking his head, but listen, as human beings were always going to disagree. And I think now because we've become accustomed to as vocalizing our opinion and how what we believe and how we feel, that we've grown distant because now we understand, oh wow, you are very different than me. Well I don't like you because of that, where before it was just like, hey, you believe what you want to believe, you vote for who you want to vote, and then I will do the same and we can still get along. Um. And so I I think it's just it gets to a point now where people just have to start being a little quieter. I think this was a blessing in disguise, because if this man is telling you to go against your family, that's just a preview of what is to come in a relationship with someone like this. You don't want to be with someone that's going to pin you against your family members or your friends. You want someone who's going to be understanding. So I think they they're just on two different ends of the spectrum, and he doesn't look like he's willing to meet her halfway. Obviously. I don't think it's a good I don't think it's a bad thing to share your opinion. I think the important thing that lies with that is just having a mindset of acceptance and inclusion and respect and respect. Those are the three things. Have opinions about everything, whether you're pro life, pro choice, all of this stuff, you can have opinions on that. That's perfectly fine. I'm not saying you shouldn't have opinions, but I'm just saying, share those opinions, but then also understand, except and include other people's opinions, you know, but don't necessarily battle fight and try and change their opinions. Maybe inform them and let them change it on their own. I guess it's my thing, but um, I don't think it's necessarily a good thing to keep your opinions inside, as long as you're willing to hear someone share their's and understand where they're coming from. But this is different because this is the guy telling the girl that she should fight against her parents opinion. This wasn't an opinion that like they've over. I agree that this guy kind of sounds like a dick for making make that decision. Absolutely, like two people in a relationship together should talk about their beliefs and and voice their opinions and hopefully they will both be adults to understand the other person's perspective and not ridicule them for it. But with the parents thing, I think there are moments in life where you just let things go and say, hey, your parents believe this, I you know, let them believe whatever they want. We can believe whatever we want, and let's just move forward. Right. He seems to be coming from a place of you have in his world, you agree with your parents and everything, or you never speak to them again, which is not realistic and not possible. It's all about respect, respecting your parents opinions, and respecting your partner's opinions. I come from a place of a very similar situation. It is possible to make a successful relationship between an atheist and a religious person. It's just about having respect for each other's opinions and and not you know, like to Jared's point, which I that was a really good point about having opinions the social media comments section. We can't let that get into our regular conversations. That can't leak into our daily discourse, or we're just doomed as a society. Not every dinner table conversation has to be about politics and religion, and you don't always have to write exactly there's different mark. So how does it work with children? Once children, that's a great question, is a great great question. Um. In our situation, my wife is the more religious of the two of the two of us, and I'm kind of letting her handle that because I don't mind my children, um being taught that taught about religion and taught about all those things because they find comfort in it, for one, and also they should know about everything. So are they baptized. They're not baptized, Okay, so you're you're educating them to make their own choice. Yes, they would like to get baptized one day. That will be their decision. And I agree with you. Mark. Ashley and I have talked about that, you know, future, about raising our kids and what we're going to teach them, and we want to make them aware as much information as they can handle, and then hopefully when they can grow up, they can make decisions based on what they believe and everything that they've taken in as children. We did need to find a church that reflected our shared beliefs, more about right and wrong rather than about heaven and hell, you know, and the extremes, and an inclusive church that didn't have an issue with homosexuality. That's sort of thing we had to find. Once we did, we're very comfortable both of us sending kids to that church. Interesting, let's take a couple of emails. But before we do that, let's take a break. All right. So maybe you've considered a sleep number bed but thought you couldn't afford one. But let me ask you this, can you really afford another restless night's sleep? There's never been a better time to save on proven quality sleep than right now. And during the Memorial Day sale, a Queen three sixty smart bed starts at only nine hundred and nine dollars. So many couples disagree on mattress firmness, and that's why I Sleep Number beds let you choose your ideal firmness on each side so it's just right for both you and your significant other. The Sleep Number three sixties smart beds are so smart they censor every move and automatically adjust to you, keeping you sleeping comfortably throughout the entire night. Sleep Number has been ranked highest in customer satisfaction with mattresses by JD Power, and don't take our word for it. Check out the award information at JD power dot com. I know I check out JD Power before every big decision I make. Come in during the Memorial Day sale and save up to with thousand dollars on a new Sleep Number three sixties Special Edition smart bed for temperature balancing comfort at an exceptional value. You'll only find Sleep Number at any of the five hundred and seventy five Sleep number stores nationwide, and you can figure out where those would be at sleep number dot com slash Dean. Go ahead and save up to a thousand dollars again at sleep number dot com Slashdan you should get in that van and see if you can hit all five D seventy sleep number stores. They would have to pay me a good but not a bad idea. I want to talk about this new obsession that I have with Third Love. So women you feel me. I mean, you know we have feet that are different sizes six and a half. I have a six and a half foot. Um so bra sizes. Third Love invented this half signature half cup sizes. They have the perfect fit. They use data points generated by millions of women who have taken their fit Finder quiz to design bras with breast size and shape in mind for the perfect fit. End premium feel. There's more sizes than most other brands. Their Love offers more than seventy sizes that seven zero seventy sizes, including their signature half cup sizes. I did the fit find your fit quiz and I just found out that I'm a half cup size. Um so, all you gotta do is skip the trip find your fit with Third loves online fit Finder. You order and you try it on at home. No hassle, no more awkward fitting room experiences of having to buzz in the lady to check in your breast size or to check in like you know that you're to measure your waist and so super easy a fit guarantee. Every customer has sixty days to wear it. You get to wash it and put it on, to try it on and test it. If you don't like it, well I'm sure you're gonna love it. All you gotta do is return it and Third Love will wash it and donate it to a woman in need. What's a funny? I was just funny, You're like, and if you don't like it, it's not gonna happen. You're gonna like it. Yeah, No, you're gonna love it. I mean it's super comfortable. Dean has tried my braws on before, and you find to really cozy. You know, it's so funny. I was telling Amy how I want my boyfriend to come on the podcast, but I'm like, might be awkward with you, Okay. So Third Love's team of expert fit stylists are dedicated to helping you find your perfect fit, and they're available every day to help via text, message, chat, or phone. Returns and exchanges are free and super easy. Third Love knows there's a perfect bra for everyone, so right now they're offering my listeners fifteen percent off your first order. So all you gotta do is go to third love dot com slash vanessa v a n e s s A to find a perfect fitting brought and get fifteen percent off your first purchase. That's third love dot com slash v A n e s s A for off today? Can we talking about FTVS at? Oh? Yeah, Anonymous says, can you guys talk more about STV? Sure? I was talking about the guy for a month, so I knew we were gonna have sex soon. Interesting that sentence alone a lot there. I told him I had herpes. I had it for about twelve years. I barely have breakouts, and I take care of myself and I keep a very healthy lifestyle. I explained to him how this works and that he could be safe with me. He said he dated someone before with STD, so we kind of knew about it, but I didn't have a lot of information. The next few days he was kind of cold with me, and then the third day he said he wasn't as open minded as he thought, so he couldn't keep dating me. I asked him if I could help him get educated so that we could continue to date. He agreed and said, I think about you all the time. I don't want to end this. A few hours later, he blocked me from everything. Now I don't know if I can never did again, you can date again. That sucks. So I'm sorry Anonymous that this happened. Um, it's it's a difficult situation because I'd be lying if I wasn't a little scared. Um. So I can understand people's reaction. But you know, something like herpes is very common. I think they said I might have these numbers wrong of the population. Well yeah, I think it's because we said last week there's type one and type two, type one, A lot of people have it. Uh yeah, Um, I think it's like people don't feel symptoms. So it's really scary if you're not getting checked. Yeah, it's like really scary if you're not getting checked because you don't you just don't know. I think guys don't have symptoms as much as women do. Um. So you're Anonymous, that's super citty, especially if you know if it's if this is your first time being open about having herpies and not having the kind of reaction that you were hoping to have or at least. Actually, what's worse is that he made it seem as if he was open to it and then kind of backed it out. That's what's That's the part. I guess you're to come to the realization that you're dating pool has gotten a little bit smaller than it would otherwise true, and it's like, it's not really for any fault of your own, it's just because of you have to understand that people are going through some times react negatively to this and once you just realize that, like, it's just you have an extra filter on your dating uh prospects essentially. But you know, the funny part is he might even have it and he has no idea because you don't. Always you can get tested for it. And after our last episode, someone wrote to me and said, uh to mention this on the podcast, and I'm happy that they did write in and and tell me this. When you get tested, you it doesn't even show up that you have herpes unless you have a breakout, and then it'll say that you have like I don't remember what it was, but basically you could have it and it can still come out as negative on your test results. Here are the stats. This is Americans. This is from Live science dot com of teens and adults under fifty have oral herpes one and eight, which is twelve and a half percent, and have a genital herpes. That's so you're not alone, Anonymous, And to that point, this is Chelsea, who didn't write this in response to you, but she actually could have. She's as I wanted to respond to Anonymous about telling her partner about herpes. She's talking about last week's Anonymous and wanted to shore my experience. I had a long term boyfriend many years ago who gave me herpes after cheating on me. I would take medication on a needed basis until if i'd a new doctor who prescribed me medication, taking a daily basis for suppressive therapy. And I'm happy to say I have not had an outbreak since college, and that was a long time ago. I met my husband later and we decided to move in together. I told him I had herpies. That's interesting that you help that until you moved in together. That seems late to me, but he was completely understanding. There were no issues. I've had kids, everything's fine. I hope this helps you. The right man will understand and not walk away. That's the key. I think the right guy is going to stick around and make this work, and if he walks, he's not the guy for you. No. I agree, That's what it really comes down to, because it is something like that is something that both people have to be understanding and okay with. UM. So, I know it sucks Anonymous that this person blocked you, and I think that's really messed up, UM. But don't let it. Don't let it um crush you to the point where you never want to date again, because there are good people out there, and there are people that you can't open up to and who will be understanding about it. The thing about this story is, uh. I mean Vanessa and her boyfriend have been dating. They don't live together. You never know once you guys moving together, he might drop a bomb on you about something that you're not necessarily interested in. Here, are you like wishing that upon me. I'm not saying anything. I'm just saying clearly, that's happened before. I bet you it's going to happen again. I don't think it's gonna happen to you, but you have to be open to the possibility of everything happening It's just it's at the end of the day, like Mark said and Jared reinforced, is the right guy isn't going to run away from this kind of information, right, It's just it's just as going to add an extra filter to the pool that you're dating. But at the end of the day, like that filter will help weed out the people that aren't worth your time anyway. So I think I think to have a healthy relationship, no one's gonna A good person won't walk away if you're being honest. I guess that actually kind of begs a question, because then how early should you tell someone because I feel like the earlier tell them, the more likely they might walk away because they're not as invest in the relationship. But if you tell them after hanging out with them a few times and it hasn't gotten into me them, in my opinion, the day before, the moment before you guys get intimate with each other, well, of course it has to come before intimacy. I'm just saying the moment before it's going to kind of kill the mood, maybe like on the day that you're expecting it to lead up to that, Yeah, or even even right before. Why not could you both know. Tonight's probably the night or day depending I don't know. Yeah, but maybe right before maybe you get the pants off and you're like, I have to tell you something, by the way before we do this, like just so you know. Yeah. I think it's an interesting question because, as you know, these people writing in who have her pies and are scared to tell people about it. It's interesting from their perspective because if I were them, i'd be nervous about telling someone too early on because then it's just it's kind of almost too much information too quickly. But here's here's the thing. I would wait rather tell someone that I have that early on than tell someone that they might have gotten it from me. This is putting I'm sorry, we're putting intimacy aside. That's I would hope a given before you become intimate somebody, if you that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. The nerves of telling someone beforehand don't come close to what I would imagine that the point of having to tell someone later on, which would be you know what I mean. I think you guys are misinterpreting what I'm trying to say. This is not I'm not saying that you're encouraging people to sleep with other people and then tell them afterwards. I'm just saying the nerves are bad, but the nerves will be much worse the longer you wait, in my opinion, Okay, so do you tell them on the first date? I stand by saying I think that you should tell them just moments before you get intimately, not moments before, but leading up to it, you know, Yeah, but that could be. I mean, sure, if it gets hot and heavy on the first date and things start moving that way, tell them. I don't mean that. You just said that the longer you wait to tell someone, the more nerves add up. And but sometimes intimacy, I mean a lot of people wait until like five six, I mean twenty dates. Who knows, Like, I think it's question regardless. I just think within twenty four hours before it happens is when it should be said in my opinion, So whether that's on the sixth day, the twentieth day, the second date, right, as long as we're I agree with you, guys. I'm just I'm trying to put a timeline on so Anonymous and everybody else can hopefully gather maybe some you want some emotional investment on his part before you tell him, because if it's if it's too early, he's gonna be like, you know what, Yeah, it's not it's fine, there's a lot of fish in the sea. But you want him to have some feelings for you, So you have to really think about it. Kind of sounds I don't think, so, you know, like like, now that I've got you invested in in this whole relationship, let me let me tell you something. And there's a difference between investment in a relationship and and getting to know someone to the point where they would want to move forward with it. For example, if you want to date with someone that you thought it was cool and nice, but they said on night one, hey I have herpes. Right, Yeah, I'm playing devil's advocate. I think that it's good to let your good qualities shine through, let those sink in for a little bit, and then share something that might not be quite as great. Yeah, I think you want to build I think you want to build a level of trust before you tell someone something that you're not going around telling everybody. So you want to make sure that that person is gonna be understanding, you know, and not like have like a horrible reaction and just walk away. It's not a good it's not a good it's not a good feeling. Like if you're being vulnerable and telling a person something that deep, I mean, it's not like you know, you want to make sure that yeah, you want to make sure that person is going to be like not a jerk about it. And so let me throw some other scenarios out there for you. You You tell me when do you tell the person this throughout the early dates? I have children. Early first date, I'm divorced. You can wait if it comes up organically. I went on a first date. This is like a year ago. But the older woman and she told me she was divorced the first date, and I was like, oh that's cool. I hold on, hold on, Why did you guys say the first date? I didn't say the first date? Who said the first date? I said, I've been told on the first date that I was on a date with a divorcee. No, no, no, sorry, I was talking about kids. Why did you guys say so quickly first date? I think for a lot of people, their kids are probably the most important things to them, and I think that they want to find someone early on that is ready to take on the responsibility of parenthood. UM so it's for me. It's kind of one of those things. I'm sure as a single parent dating. They don't want to mess around with people who are not ready to take on kids, and so let them know early on to see what their reaction is. Um, so they don't waste their time. I don't. I agree. It's well said said. Hey, thanks you guys. All right, that's it for me. I'll see you guys next week. I have a couple more if you want to. I've been in prison. When do you mention that to them? I've been to prison? Oh you have? Have you been to jailer? Have you been to prison? Prison? I understand there's a difference between the two. Yeah, prisons more hardcore. You're badass. Thank you, very you and your hay arm with tattoo, it's pretty awesome. It wasn't for a felony. It was for when I was When I was under twenty one, I got arrested a few times for underage drinking, underage possession of alcohol, and I never did my community service. I never paid my fines, and eventually I got some warns out for my arrest, and then I eventually crashed my car one day and when the cops came to repair that accident, you're a badass teeny baby. And then I went to the I went to the hearing and they're like, hey, just because like we're you're clearly never gonna do your court sentenced community service, You're never gonna pay the fines. We're just gonna saitance you five days, uh in El Paso County, And uh, that sounds like a rough one. And then I got backed down to three days. And then I went through, I got processed, got into my holding cell, gotten to my cell where I was supposed to be for the next three days. And then I woke up a couple hours later to someone shaking me and they're like, hey, man, the prison is getting off full. You should probably get out and make room for some real criminals. And I was like, all right. So I spent twelve hours of prison and I was honestly, it was it was eye opening experience. I kind of I never want to go back. But ever since I turned twenty one, like all my offenses were alcohol related. Um, just because I was like an underage in possession of it. I haven't been in trouble to last sensee. So what was it? Like? What were these twelve hours like? Um, it was funny because a lot of the inmates theyre had like they were re offenders, right, and so they were all homies and they were all buddies and they were all like, oh, what are you doing for this time? Jacked a car like that kind of stuff. Um, A lot of it was drugs too, because Colorado Springs is kind of a sketchy druggie area. But yeah, that was my twelve hours in prison. That's my people you go out with about that. Yeah, I'm not really ashamed of it by any means. Um. I think it's kind of more like, yeah, you didn't do any Like, it's not like, yeah, it was just I think. I mean the story of how I got arrested of one of those times I was just like, you know, trying to get into a bar with a fake I d and I was drunk and they're like, oh, yeah, alcohol in your system, we're taking you to jail for the night. And it was just a bunch of those kind of things happened when I was like nineteen and twenty years old. So you spent more time behind bars than just the twelve hours. Oh, I spend the night in jail about four times. Yeah, I got well, maybe five times I got arrest. I got arrestipe stealing groceries and I was like sixteen. Uh that one, I was what did you steal? Like just food? Yea uh? And then like I like a couple of You're like, you're added a couple of drunk tech times where I was like drunken underage and they're like, oh, you're clearly like underage and drinking alcohol, so we're going to that and you like stay the night in our jail. That happened like three or four times. Um. Yeah, you know that you probably just got more appealing to some women who want who like badasses. Great dude, you write a motorcycle you live in. But also I think that's hopeful because you clearly went through a really difficult time in your teenage years and for reasons we've discussed, but you've turned out really well. I appreciate that. I think you're a great guy and you're a sweet guy, and I think that's really nice. I made a lot of mistakes in my life, and I'm willing to Um, I don't know, own up to them. Maybe maybe help other people grow from them. I don't know. But that's the thing that's like, I don't want to not share those little stories with someone and then like six years later be like, hey, you never told me that you did any that stuff? You know what I mean? Yeah, of course it's all again. It's all like I'm ashamed of any It's just like a here's like a matter of fact thing that's happened to me when I was, you know, eight years ago. Essentially, do you guys have never been a jail or anything like that? Any any runs with the I got. I got a lot of suspending high school. I got tazed by the cops once. That one. That one was pretty bad. That was pretty bad. This story, this one, this might have been my worst arress actually of all Eastern This synopsis rights itself this week. This was my worst arress by far By far By far Um. I was like, it was like two weeks before my twenty one birthday, and all my friends in college were older. They were all like, and so that's what we do instead of going to house parties, would go to the bars. And it was like two thirty in the morning, and we're all going home, and I was trying to get into this bar to to alleviate myself to go to the bathroom. My friend went in and they wouldn't let me in because my I d obviously looked super super fake, and so I was. I was pretty drunk at the time, and so I just started peeing right there on the side of the street, and this cop was like, hey, kids, stop peeing. And I turned around and I go, I can't remember what I said. I said something really stupid, and I put my pants up and started running away in the opposite direction, and uh, I swear I was running faster than I've ever ran in my entire life. But all of a sudden, my body locked up and I face planeted in the ground because he shot me with the taser gun. Holy crap. And then I had to spend the night in the hospital. So I guess that one I didn't spend behind bars. I spent that one in hospital, but you would have I would have bars. Yeah, that's pretty awesome. So it would have been five nights. Yeah, that's awesome. That was That was a bad one. What did it feel like? I was pretty drunk, fortunately, so like I didn't feel it too much. Um. I was told that when the cops came and they're like handcuffing me, and my friends were like dude, what should we do? Like can we help you? And I was like no, just go like I've accepted my fate. I like woke up in the I like woke up in the hospital. I was like pretty drunk, you know. I was like twenty years old and we're selling I don't know, we're partying whatever. And I woke up in the hospital at like four or five in the morning and there was like sticky things all over me because they're like checking my vitals and stuff, and I'm like where am I? And I started like peeling the stuff off of me, and I like get up and start like trying to leave, and then doctors come out and they're like, yo, you can't leave, like we still got a lot of stuff to do. Um. Yeah, it was that was a rough one because I got charged with like four separate things like um minor possession of alcohol, running from a police officer like that type of stuff. It was all They were all misdemeanors, of course, but that one was like a hefty, hefty charge. Yeah, if you had any like major charges, you wouldn't be on the Bachelor. No. And I told them all too, because you go through the background check and then like, do you have any felonies? I go, no, but I've I've got quite a few misdemeanors. From when I was twenty years old, I was like rebelling a lot, you know, especially like even in high school, I had at least one suspension every single week, um or I had to three detentions a week. Mostly not like because I was being mean or bad or anything. I was just like absently late and truant and all that kind of stuff. The worst thing I think I ever did was I was coming back from a party sophomore year and I had my dad's card, just got my license. He had a blue station wagon and I was the designated driver. I didn't drink all night, and there was like eight nine kids in this Then I was all bring it home, and then they were all yelling. Nobody had the seatbelt on, so it's like a chaotic station wagon. And I must have been speeding a little bit, and a cop came the other way, turned hers around, flashed his lights on and as a sixteen year old, my heart dropped with my dad in the car, all these kids were drunk next to me, all under age. I was fine, but in my head I thought I was in the biggest trouble. And then one of the buddies in the back was like, remember this was like fifteen years ago, and he was like, dude, I got weed. And then I immediately I was going to jail because in my sixteen year old head, weed was like cocaine. And so then I don't know why I thought this was a good idea. I sped off into a side street. I literally tried to run from the cops, and then went into the first driveway, parked the car, turn the lights off, thinking that that was a good idea, and then one of the kids in the back seat try to jump out and run the from the cops. With the cop pulled back, got out of his car. To this day, I don't know if he was pointed his gun not, but he was like, get back in the car right now, and he was like pointing, and obviously we couldn't tell if he was pulled his whole star or what. So he immediately got back in the car and he came up and then it was fine afterwards because he came up and I was her dad was in the car with you this whole time. No, no, it was my dad's car. And he came up and he was screaming at us, and and and and I talked to him for like twenty minutes, and finally he was like, just make sure everybody gets home safely, and don't you ever drive away from a copy net. Again. That's pretty cool, so thank god. But other than that, yeah, nothing. That was probably the craziest right there. Crazy. Oh. I got robbed by the cops in Mexico one time too. That was quite terrifying. Yeah, I guess I thought I was gonna die. But it was like three o'clock in the morning. I was alone in the back alley. It was quite terrifying. I was drunk. It was the first time ever black out became black out drunk. And then I was throwing up in the club. I thought it was a good idea for trying to get myself home, went on the bus, passed out in the bus, woke up. Bus driver was like, no more stops, you gotta get off. I walked out in this like dark alley, pitch black cop car pulls up, flashes the lights and I'm like, oh, thank god. Comes up. He's like, what are you doing here? Why are you here? Why are you alone? And I was like, oh, I'm trying to get back to my hotel. I don't know where I am. Blah blah blah. One of them come up behind me, starts pushes me against the car, starts padding me down, takes out my wall at my camera. It gives me back my wall and they're like, have a good night. And I checked my wallet, all my credit cards and cash or gown. They took my camera, uh, passport, I didn't I think I left at the hotel. They told us leave a hotel because it was a party bus. And then I tried to take like the metro bus back just to get back to the hotel by myself, not telling my friends any of this. And so then I was left without any cash. And then a taxi cab pulled up and I was like, he's like, I need money before you can get in the car, because I've gotten You know a lot of times they'll pull up to the hotel and these douche bags will just run out and they won't get him and so he's like, no, if you don't have money, see you. So then he pulled away. I was like, I don't know why I'm gonna do right now. And then I remember there's guys walking past me and I was just waiting, waiting for one of them to just try to jump me. And then finally the cab came around like five minutes later. It was like get in the car, and I was like, thank you so much and draw me back to the hotel. Went up paid him, and that was my story right there. Then I knocked on my buddy's door. The next day he opened it, bloody chin. It was like, what the hell happened to you? I got thrown out of the club and they pushed me against sment, busting my chin open. I was like, let's get the hell out of here. Let's just go back home. Do you wanna why? But I wish you had back then? What do you think? What did I need? I think you probably needed a better, more athletically fit body, and that yes, And I think that if you had open fit that you probably would have been in a much better situation. Where was open open fifteen years ago? Let me tell you guys about open fit real quick. Open Fit takes all the complexity out of losing weight and getting fit. It's a brand new, super simple streaming service that allows you to work out from the comfort of your living room and as little as ten minutes every single day. Everyone's bodies are different and open fit gets that, which is why it personalized to your needs with custom tailored, original content. Open Fit classes are led by some of the most effective and engaging trainers in the world. You can sculpture body with Andrea Rodgers, who is the founder of extend Bar. Or you can get in crazy good shape with Hunter McIntyre, named by Sports Illustrated as one of the top fifty fittest athletes. These trainers know how to get your results quick. You can access on your computer, on your web enabled TV, on your tablet, smartphone, and Roku. My personal favorite is six hundred Seconds with Devin Wiggins. It's a ten minute workout that is fat burning, muscle building and body sculpting, and you can choose from forty two high intensity workouts of every type in style. Open Fit has changed the way that I work out and with our code Dean, you can join me on a fitness journey personalized just for you again. Our code is Dean, and you can start using open Fit for your journey to a healthier life. Right now, they're offering a thirty day challenge to our listeners. Get a special extended thirty day free trial membership to open Fit where you can lose up to fifteen pounds in thirty days. When you text d that's d E A N to thirty thirty thirty Why would you not try that thirty three days and you can lose up to fifteen pounds in those just what we say. If Dean's vans are rocking, don't come and knocking because I'm doing and that's why it's moving around some. In the six hundred seconds with Devin Wiggins in there, it's pretty spacious. Actually, Um, that'll do it for this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating. Uh So next week I'm told we have a doctor coming in to answer all of your questions. So if you have questions that doctor should answer. So I guess there's is so much what does he mean by this text? And why don't guys like me? And stuff like that. These are more medical situations. I suck at dating at I Heart Media dot com seems appropriate because we've had quite a bit of STD talk. So we are going to be having an episode on Memorial Day week for our listeners because we love you so so much and we want to answer your medical questions. So email us. I suck at dating at ihart media dot com. I'm gonna um and courage people on Instagram maybe on Facebook to do the same thing. Medical questions are tough because it's like, obviously it's hard to really get the answer to that having someone look at specific things that are going on. But it's good to get general of ideas of what's going on. It could be sexual questions, a lot of stuff that just happens that we are unaware of. Um, sexual questions are good. What kind of questions do you think you have a top of your head to encourage like other people? I think the question well, one of the emails that we got, like when to tell someone you have an s t I you know, that's that's perfect. I asked a professional how to have a conversation, a nice breaker conversation to tell your partner about your sitch. Mark. I think that's a good one. I think, um, like in my normal like that I do this that normal? This looks like this is that normal? I'm not My sex drive is dropped dramatically recently. That would be something to ask a doctor and a heart literally break. Do you think, Oh yeah, I did read that apparently can um? All right, well, I'm looking forward to that then. So next week, Memorial Day, we're gonna have a doctor in here. We'll answer some medical questions. Be sure to tune in. Then, thank you so much for listening to this week's episode of Help I Suck At Dating. Looking forward to having you back next week, where we might suck a little bit less should we do. Thank you. Follow Help by Suck At Dating with being Vanessa and Jared on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast

SUCKERS with Caelynn Bell, Dean Bell, and Jared Haibon

Bachelor fan favorites Caelynn Bell, Dean Bell, and Jared Haibon are now officially SUCKERS. They’v 
Social links
Follow podcast
Recent clips
Browse 456 clip(s)