Memoirists do the generous work of letting us into their lives, and then there are ones like Melissa Febos who also graciously entertain all the new questions their work inspires. Melissa lets me in on the elements of her life and experiences that I’m curious about, from people’s reaction to her job as a dominatrix (as documented in her book Whipsmart) to her year-long trial of celibacy (the focus of her newest book, The Dry Season). Melissa is a writer both precise and elaborate, and I can’t help but compare her to many of the literary greats. We trace the roots of her compulsive behaviors and discuss how seeking new ideals for love and connection can help to find passion in the everyday — even in a conversation. 

Fail Better is now on YouTube! Watch this episode here.

Follow me on Instagram at @davidduchovny. Find more video podcasts on our YouTube channel. Stay up to date with Lemonada on X, Facebook and Instagram at @LemonadaMedia.

Joining Lemonada Premium is a great way to support our shows and get bonus content. Subscribe today on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

For a list of current sponsors and discount codes for this and every other Lemonada show, go to lemonadamedia.com/sponsors.

Memoirists do the generous work of letting us into their lives, and then there are ones like Melissa Febos who also graciously entertain all the new questions their work inspires. Melissa lets me in on the elements of her life and experiences that I&rsquo;m curious about, from people&rsquo;s reaction to her job as a dominatrix (as documented in her book Whipsmart) to her year-long trial of celibacy (the focus of her newest book, The Dry Season). Melissa is a writer both precise and elaborate, and I can&rsquo;t help but compare her to many of the literary greats. We trace the roots of her compulsive behaviors and discuss how seeking new ideals for love and connection can help to find passion in the everyday &mdash; even in a conversation.&nbsp;
Fail Better is now on YouTube! Watch this episode <a href="https://youtu.be/dJd3AaZdqyU">here</a>.
Follow me on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/davidduchovny/">Instagram</a> at @davidduchovny. Find more video podcasts on our <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@FailBetterwithDavidDuchovny">YouTube channel</a>. Stay up to date with Lemonada on <a href="https://twitter.com/LemonadaMedia">X</a>, <a href="https://www.facebook.com/lemonadamedia/">Facebook</a> and <a href="https://www.instagram.com/lemonadamedia/">Instagram</a> at @LemonadaMedia.
Joining Lemonada Premium is a great way to support our shows and get bonus content. Subscribe today on <a href="http://bit.ly/lemonadapremium">Apple Podcasts</a>, <a href="https://lemonada.supportingcast.fm/">Spotify</a>, or wherever you get your podcasts.
For a list of current sponsors and discount codes for this and every other Lemonada show, go to&nbsp;<a href="http://lemonadamedia.com/sponsors">lemonadamedia.com/sponsors</a>.

To be human is to fail – period. And not just to fail once, but to fail a lot. As the author Samuel Beckett said: “Fail again. Fail better.” This saying means a lot to me and my family – so much so that my daughter got a tattoo of it. Why are we, and so many others, so deeply concerned by failure? And if it’s something we all do so often, why are we so afraid of it – especially those of us here in win-at-all-costs America? In this podcast, I sit down with successful, thoughtful people like Ben Stiller, Bette Midler, Sean Penn and more to talk about failure – or what they labeled “failure,” but what was really an unparalleled opportunity for growth and revelation. I even want to delve into my own hardest moments, when I wrestled with setbacks, shame, and fear. We’ll still fail again. And again. But maybe if we fail better, we’ll feel better -- and maybe if we can all laugh together in failure, that's a start.

To be human is to fail – period. And not just to fail once, but to fail a lot. As the author Samuel Beckett said: “Fail again. Fail better.” This saying means a lot to me and my family – so much so that my daughter got a tattoo of it. Why are we, and so many others, so deeply concerned by failure? And if it’s something we all do so often, why are we so afraid of it – especially those of us here in win-at-all-costs America? In this podcast, I sit down with successful, thoughtful people like Ben Stiller, Bette Midler, Sean Penn and more to talk about failure – or what they labeled “failure,” but what was really an unparalleled opportunity for growth and revelation. I even want to delve into my own hardest moments, when I wrestled with setbacks, shame, and fear. We’ll still fail again. And again. But maybe if we fail better, we’ll feel better -- and maybe if we can all laugh together in failure, that's a start.