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FULL SHOW: The Day We Learned the Art of Accidental Rudeness

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Published Mar 22, 2025, 2:00 PM

A mix of awkward and hilarious moments, from accidentally being rude to neighbors, to quirky first date stories and breakups. We dive into the chaos of Danielle vs. Sheldon’s peeler fight, Nate’s window peeping, haunted sightings, and lessons from grandparents. Plus, the strange life changes that made a difference and Allie’s stalking adventures!

Hi.

Oh my god, I love you so much.

You guys are every single morning. I love all of you.

Wow, this is amazing.

I'm talking Elvist.

In the morning show, Brit.

Dennis said, it's just really great article yesterday. Five unintentionally rude things people do.

Oh I bet scary? Does all of them?

And some?

Is it rude and its unintentional? Yes, yes, they'll be rude. You should think things through before you do them. May I give you the list? Yes?

Please?

Slurping and being a loud eater, oh god, now hold on.

There is a cultural exception to this.

If you're eating ramen, or are you eating you know, like noodles out of a soup from Asia, slurp away, you're supposed to slur supposed to.

Isn't there's some place where you eat like that. It's like a term of endearment or term of like I really like what I'm eating?

Is that it could be? I mean I know that.

You know, if you go down to any of the incredible Roman houses in New York City, you walk in all your hears it sounds like a.

Big vacuum cleaner. It's fabulous. That's good. So but other than that, scary. Remember scary. We used to give him hell because he would chew with his mouth open.

And you're like, yes, I have a friend who does that, and she talks while she's doing it. So it's a lot of like, oh, oh yeah, I totally that was great, and.

I'm like, can you please? I love you? Can you stop that exactly?

Also, uh, intentionally rude things people do, combating on someone's appearance or pointing out any abnormality.

Oh yeah, my dad will do that. If you see somebody with like purple hair, so you got purple hair? Oh, your tattoos. Let's talk about the tattoos. A lot of people don't want to talk about it. Yeah, right, which I mean he's like, well, why would you put them where I can see them?

If I'm not allowed to ask?

It's you know what they're now saying. It's rude to even positively comment on someone's looks.

Oh, that's come on.

I don't think anyone really has a problem with you.

Oh no, I would I have I wouldn't, but sometimes some people do have an issue with it. So if you don't know who you're dealing with, and you can give them a compliment on the way they look, they get they could get a little upset.

So yeah.

There was a girl in the store the other day and she had the best butt I have ever seen. And I almost went over to her and said, Hey, I don't mean you know anything by this, but I gotta tell you you got a nice butt. And then I thought twice about it, and I was like, you know, this day and age, probably not the best thing to say. So I walked out and I didn't say anything. But she really did have a nice book, there you go.

I had a conversation with one of my girlfriends the other day who's really been struggling with some eating issues, and she said she hates it when people tell her that she looks great and she's lost so much weight. She's like, even though I have, it's not a good thing that I've lost this weight. So when people say it to me, I feel immediately, you know, caught off guard. And I said, I, you know, honestly, I didn't really think about that. I definitely am the person who has said that to other people, like.

Oh, you lost weight, you look great. Yeah, me too, you also looked great before, So maybe I just shouldn't say anything at all.

Oh yeah, it's the same as some Oh you clean up nice, okay, well thanks, meaning I'm.

A slob otherwise. Uh yeah, Froggy, what was your.

Thought speaking of not commenting on someone's appearance yesterday with my dad? You know how my dad is somebody had like half of their hair was colored purple, and my dad says, oh, so they ran out they didn't get to finish.

Oh no, no, what did he say it to them?

Yes, he thinks he's like being funny and being nice and starting a conversation like that. Please don't do stuff like that.

I love that.

Other ways, you can be rude a question that implies there's something wrong.

Nate does that all the time.

Like if someone's having a bad day and someone comments, oh, she must be crazy or she has some kind of baggage she's doing with he'll say.

That, yeah, I mean yeah.

Or when people ask you if you're tired, why you look tired?

Oh?

You know what I learned the hard way never ever said that to anyone. I wasn't thinking. A good friend of mine looked tired, and I was like, God, you look tired, really, Elvis, You're going to say sit down?

Sorry?

Uh?

Being habitually late with no valid excuse.

Oh yeah, Indian people. I hope you're listening.

What do you mean?

Oh my gosh.

So many and it's not just Indian people, but so many people will blame their culture on why they're late. Oh you know, so we call it ist Indian standard.

Time.

You know, I'm on is T? Stop being on?

Is T?

Can you like I need to know when you're actually going to show up somewhere. That's terrible.

I've never noticed you late. You never seem to be late.

I will not do it. I try my hardest to be on time every now and then, you know, you have slips. But my sister is the worst. And she says it's not that she is rude. She's optimistic about how long it takes to get placed.

That's a good I didn't traffic. Yeah, I was hoping, all right.

So you know, okay, let's see other unintentional, actually intentionally rude things people do.

Asking a woman how far into her pregnancy she is.

I done that, I've done that. And the woman had just had the baby, and I go, oh my gosh, how much time you have? She goes, oh, I just had the baby. Never I'll never do that again.

Ever, Well, like you don't want to look at someone and go, God, you're so pregnant.

I mean really, Oh when they tell people you're running up pop like thank you.

I usually would say, oh my gosh, you're so tiny, you're carrying so small and they go, no, I'm not.

I'll never forget the night before Lisa gave birth to kytence So nineteen years ago. Two days ago, we went to a restaurant and the guy turned around to.

See us and he goes, wow, he just jumped back. She looked like that.

She goes, he's due tomorrow. I was like, oh my god, it's hilarious.

I don't know, but it's the thing is. And someone's texting in about this too. Sometimes I feel like we're living in a world where people are way too sensitive. Yes, absolutely without I mean, you could just catch someone off, maybe they're just having an easily triggered day or whatever, and you say something.

Like what do you mean by that? Explain that to me, yes, and.

You realize, okay, I pushed a button here that I should not have pushed.

Right, all right, yes, scary. Another rude thing.

I'd like to add one, and that would be when you're eating with a friend, and then at the very end of the meal, they're like, hey, you want to try some of this because they're finished with it already. Well, if you really cared, if I wanted to try some you would have asked me in the beginning, but not after you're completely finished. I can't eat another bite. Yeah, you could have the scratch. Would you like some of this? Would you like to try some of this? They do that at the end.

Got check that I got lindsay Line twenty four. She has one.

Hi, Lindsay, how are you good doing well? Thanks for asking? Now go ahead. What's rude?

Tell me?

I hate when someone says, especially if you're shopping or something, someone will be like, oh, you should smile more.

Oh yeah, yeah, nothing causes an immediate frown like that.

Sometimes it comes off cringey too, like it comes off creepy as well, like if the guy comes up to the girls and they're like, you should smile more?

What, yeah, you should mind your own business more, Get out of my face. No, no, So, do you have a bitchy resting face or whatever it's called resting bitchy face?

I do.

I've never been told I have.

Yeah, well, good you hang out with nice people. Well yeah, if someone looks at me and says, God, which one with you? You look like you're in a bad mood. Well I wasn't until you said something stupid like that. Way, goodbye, get out of here. Well, thank you, lindsay you'll have a great day. I do appreciate you listening every day. Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Oh can I add two to this?

Oh? Feel free one?

My dad bless his heart again. He tries to guess where people are from.

It's the worst thing in the world.

Do you mean give me an example?

Oh are you all? Are you from Honduras? Right? Like, no, I'm Japanese. Well you'll look Hondoran. I'm like, okay, you stop with that. Dad. You didn't even talk to this person for one second. You just guessed it.

Right.

Look, I know Gandhi that you love your mom and dad very much, but you do love You do love to point things out about your father that drive you insane.

If you were around him for five minutes, you'd be like, yep.

I want Gandhi's and my dad to hang out.

Oh my god, oh my god.

I would open up like a portal to a different universe.

I want to see how many people they can offend in an hour.

Oh my god, I doubt it would be a lowdown of things. And then the other thing is I get this all the time. People ask me where I'm from, and they don't mean where were you born?

Where did you grow up? They mean like, why do you look like that?

Which is it's I don't find it to be a rude question, but you can't guise it as where are you from? Because I will tell you I live in Jersey City, right right, No, that's not what I mean.

Well, when you like, where are you from from?

If someone asks you about your heritage, what's your family's heritage?

Yes?

Is that interesting?

Totally fine with that, Yeah, or you know, like where's your family from where?

Stuff like that. It's totally fine.

But a lot of times people will just ask the question and then get really irritated that I'm not giving them the answer.

They pay you why are you brown?

You?

Why are you looking like that? All brown? And stuff?

Okay, thanks for one more thought from Brook, and we'll move on with our lives. Hello, Brook, how's it going. Hi, guys, We're doing well, and thank you for asking?

What is your spin on this entire thing.

So something I have learned in my life when I meet people and instead of commenting on how they look, saying you know, you look good, I like to say you look really happy, and for the most part, that gets a really positive reaction from them instead of commenting on how they look.

I get it, that makes sense. You look happy?

Yeah, you know one somewhere.

What do you mean I look happy? Happy? Isn't eat too much?

Like you're smiling? Like you look really happy? And most of them like, oh, thank you. And if they're not happy, then they'll proceed to tell you all about that.

Yeah. Oops, all right, well look, thank you. We're gonna steal your idea. Everyone. You look happy, all right, have a great day, Brook, Thanks for listening to us.

What's up?

Hi?

I'm Sam Smith, Speedy ex with Elvis Gerant on The Morning Show.

Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

Hey, how many of us I still have grandparents that are alive? Anyone?

Oh lucky if you do? Yeah?

Yeah?

Wait wait, hold on, Diamond does Diamond? Yeah, yeah, you have grandparents that are still around?

I sure do.

She lives with her grandma, right, yep?

Yeah, so I think she's alive. Yeah, hello you. Has she taught you anything? What did? What did you learn from your grandmother? I was thinking about this last night.

She's taught me a lot.

Honestly. The main thing is to just do you.

That's her.

That's her slogan.

Do you do you want?

That's good.

If you don't want to do something, don't let anyone talk you into doing something that you don't want to do. Like she's very much like stuck in her ways and it annoys me.

But I like it.

Wh I know, But that's the same thing that annoys us about you. Ah, hey, no, I'm kidding. No, But what is there something she taught you?

Like to do? A thing?

Oh?

From her past she taught you, she passed it down to you.

Oh like cooking, Like what listen? She knows how to make pancakes. And by she I mean me because she taught me how to make There you go, speak, golden pancakes.

There you go.

What's a secret to.

It other than life lessons? Grandma taught you how to make the perfect pancake. Yes, my grandmother taught me how to make biscuits, and I know how to make it because of her, and I saw what she put in there and it was not healthy.

But it's good. Scary your grandma and grandfather who My grandma taught me how to make the perfect omelet. That's why I'm such a well this is all food now.

My grandma used to tell me to air it out at night.

Oh wow, okay.

She used to say, you should air it out.

Why do you do?

I remember her telling me that I'd be like whatever. She made the best meatballs, but she never taught me how to make them.

Well, So do you air it out every night?

I do not.

I do not listen to grandma as much as I should.

Can.

I have specifics on what that means.

It means you sitting wear underwear.

That's what I thought.

So I just want to know your nightgown it out.

That makes sense.

I may take your grandmother's advice.

So Alice's grandfather taught him how to do woodworking and how to build things, and he still does. And he taught him how to play golf. He learned a lot of stuff from his granddad. But you know what, of course, other than diamond, our grandparents are, they're gone. But it's good to remember the time. I remember my grandfather on my mother's side. I think by example, he taught me how to smoke a cigarette one puff.

I never did solid trick. Yeah, there you go. So here's to the grandparents.

Yeah, the grandparents.

Nate, you're being so quiet over there. Think it about it.

I mean, I unfortunately didn't know my one grandmother, and then my grandfather, who I really wish I would have known, passed when I was nine. But my grandmother she would use me and my brother's as manual labor. So I learned how to do all sorts of things outside, like what garden beds, gardening. I mean, I actually really enjoy it now because it reminds me of my grandma.

So you considered it manual labor back then.

Well, so now it's like you actually learn I'm a garden from your grandmother.

It was funny because I mean we were like nine ten. She would pull up to the house at seven am.

All right, get in the car. We're going to Buzz.

And Bees, which was like the hardware store, and we'd pick up these big cinder blocks and go to my grandma's backyard and build garden beds.

You see, you learn something A lot of people listening it you probably learned something. You just didn't really remember it, but you did.

You did so.

I didn't have either of my grandpa's growing up.

They both died pretty young, but all of the other kids in the family knew my dad's dad, so my one grandfather and they where. They will all tell you that I am him reincarnated. He died two months before my birthday, before I was ever on the planet, and they said everything about me from the moment I was born is just like him.

Wow, he was naughty. Apparently.

It's also something you could learn from your great great grandfather is how.

To try to stop a colonization in your country.

Absolutely, I've learned how to make salt from the ocean.

There you go. We all have things sary you did from your great great grande. Thank you made a Gandhi, don't answer the.

Phone, Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone taps.

All right, Danielle, you're doing the phone tap today?

Yes?

Perfect. We received a letter from Emily. See Emily is taking some college classes and she's decided to get her dad involved.

Yeah.

Anyway, well, Danielle's gonna make a call as a professor to Dad, and then Emily will speak to her dad. Let's see exactly what's going on in today's phone tap.

Hello, I may speak to Larry Please, this is Professor Peery. Uh huh, I am your daughter Emily's sculpting teacher.

Is everything all right?

Yeah? Everything is great. I just wanted to confirm that you're going to be there on Friday.

On Friday, is there something going on? She hasn't told me anything about this.

Oh, actually she signed you up on Friday for nine forty five for a model for our class.

I know she hasn't told me anything about this.

Yeah, I mean, would you be willing to come in and post for the class so they could sculpt you?

I don't know. I guess I should talk to her about it.

But well, I guess if she didn't tell you anything, then you don't know that it's actually a nude sculpting class. Excuse me, I mean this session that we're doing is nude models. And she said, oh, my dad, it's perfect. He's in great shape. He'll be great for this.

No, that that really isn't something I would do.

She said, Oh, he's the coolest dad.

He's like, he's not.

You know, one of these you know what excuse me, I'm going to need to talk to her about this, But no, the answer is absolutely Once they.

Sculpted you, it's not like people are going to know that it's Larry's you know what. They're just going to know it's somebody's you know what.

You know.

I don't know why you're pushing me on this. I've told you right now, this is not something I'm comfortable with and it's not something I'm going to do. And I will talk to my daughter about what.

Will we give you a hundred bucks?

No, that's not the point. The point is is that I'm not going to strip in front of anybody, let alone a group of strangers, now please, Okay, well, okay, then how about this?

Would you feel more comfortable if your wife was in the class?

No?

Absolutely not. This is ridiculous, it's so funny.

So upset all, I'll wait for him to call.

Okay, okay, Oh my gosh, okay, hold on.

He's calling.

He's calling I three way am in right, Okay, hold on, okay, go ahead.

Hey, I just.

Got a really rather disturbing call from none of your professors.

Huh.

She said that you volunteered me to come in and be a model.

Yeah, you said you were busy one when I talked to you last week.

Yeah, No, I thought you wanted to have lunch or something. I didn't realize you were going to start volunteering me for stuff. Well, you know what she's she's a little crazy, this woman.

She wanted No ways upset you kind of really.

Because this woman asked me to come in and model naked in your class that. I can't believe you even you even thought I would, I would possibly consider that I would. I cannot tell you how embarrassing that was.

Hell, I don't even understand what's wrong with that done?

What do you mean you say that I could get out of.

My body, that I should respect my body.

My body, your body, but not not and not not to display it in front of a bunch of strangers. I don't know what you were than.

My classmates and their professional.

Well, okay, if you feel comfortable with it, you're a you're a grown girl. You can do whatever you want. But no, how dare you volunteer me for something like that without even asking me?

I talked to more about it mom though, too, and she's.

The prudest person on the planet. She was lying like to lie on a beach in a bathing suit. You're you're talking about about being in a in a class naked novel.

She has, she has the ability.

There's a difference between the part this is crap.

Fine, Well, if you're not gonna help me out with class, at least can I put you.

On the radio?

What hey, Larry, Larry, Yeah, this is Daniel Monarrow from Elvis Durant in the Morning Show.

And you just got phone tapped.

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

Okay, okay, now, oh, it was getting to a point there where I thought, okay, something is wrong here, something is really wrong.

Elvis Duran's phone tap.

This phone table was pre recorded with permission granted.

By Ali the Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

All right, So if if you live in a city that doesn't have a lot of high rise buildings, maybe the won't affect you. But put yourself in our place, Okay, in New York City, if you go to a friend's apartment and then let's say on the fortieth floor or thirtieth floor, what twentieth floor, It doesn't matter, And you know, they have windows open, Nick and see in other people's apartments. And then you see right there on the on the the table next to the chair in the living room, there's a pair of binoculars.

Yeah, okay, you know. And so we're having this conversation. If you're in an apartment, even like the third floor of an apartment, the apartments that look into other apartments, and you see binoculars out in the living room, you know what's going on.

So okay, you think that's creepy, listen to how creepy straight Nate is.

Tell them your story?

Do you dare tell this story on the radio because everyone will now know how creepy you truly are.

Well, I'm not the only one that does it.

I guarantee anybody that lives in a high rise in New York City has done at least.

I live in a high rise and I don't do it.

Well, maybe it's been done to you then, Elvis, Because it started I like bird. So it started with we had an apartment overlooking the Hudson River, and I'm like, okay, what's that bird out there? And then gradually the birds weren't as interesting as what was going on in the high rise next door to us. So every once in a while i'd see my neighbors walking around and people walk around naked.

Yeah, I do it, you do it. And so I would sit there, no no, no, no, tell them where you were sitting and what happened.

In order to not be seen, I would turn the lights off in the room and sit in the back of the room so that they couldn't see me as I was looking at them.

Off. My god, I'm not the only one that does it. I guarantee you I'm not the only one that does that. That is so, that is so rare window I have ever seen rare window?

The old hitchcock exactly what I thought immediately, Jimmy Stewart.

It is creepy. Yeah, Gandhi, you don't think that's creepy.

Oh, I think it's so creepy.

But I do live in a high rise building, like almost at the top of it, and all I want is binoculars because I see all of these windows. And your assistant, Andrews's sister lives in a building across from me.

We decided we're gonna get binocular so we can watch each.

Other watching Lord, what's scary?

So It is like watching a different TV show in each window if you stare long enough and you're there for like a couple of hours, and like me, I'm across from another high rise, or I look into what's going on this floor over here on the left, and then on that they're on the right, and it's like turning channels on on TV.

It's like, what's going on there? What's happening here?

Movies, that's in movies when the psycho is sitting there and he has like all these different monitors sitting there.

Not in a movie, if you're straight, nate or scary, it's like watching like a massive zoom room with all these naked people. Like over here you see a woman making dinner, and then over here you see two kids doing their homework. Then you're over here you see some guy like like going to town on someone else, like on the bed. You don't know who it is or what it is.

You know, it's just it's it's it's an ongoing show. So I've heard, yes, Nate.

Gonna call BS on you, Elvis, because anytime we see something crazy happening in the hotel next to us over here at the building, you're the first one to push everybody out the way.

Let me say, well, okay, there's a difference.

There's a difference. I'll tell you what it is.

That hotel across what street is that Lispernard Street is so close and we are so evidently in our building working. If they're doing it with the with the shades open, they know we're looking. Oh yeah, with binoculars. You're in the back of your dark room. Back there, jacket.

Yes I'm.

Yes, you are, Yes, you are.

Maybe I got excited once or twice. There was a time this guy was naked playing a guitar and his girlfriend came in naked too, and he serenaded her.

It was the weirdest I see. I think that's sweet.

Get a hobby, a different one hobby, hobby, know, a different hobby.

To get some binocular I have the whole New York skyline. I want to look in the Empire State Building, the new HUDs and yards.

I just want to see all of it.

Well, I will tell you something interesting, and it made me think, hmm, maybe I need binoculars.

As a matter of fact, maybe not.

Because the building across the street from my building is just now opening that they redid this old building. It's a beautiful apartment building. And uh, Nicole Kidman and what's her husband's name, the country singer Keith Urban. They just bought they just bought an apartment over there. So I'm warning you now, Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban. Uncle Elvis is watching you.

I know.

Oh wait, wait, hold on, stop it. I got Zach on twenty four I was listing my time. We need to fill time and we'll do it with Zach.

Hello, Zach, how are you good?

Good morning everybody?

I'm good, good morning.

So you're you're not looking through binoculars at other people? You're assuming people are watching you through binoculars.

Why do you think that correct?

Because I'm a nudist and everybody in like a farmer complex, they shut their curtains because of me. Before they had it open, but when I moved in now they're all shut.

So so many questions.

They're looking at me as the pinoculars.

Well, so being a nudist, so you you enjoy just being nude, it is no big deal. But is there also a component about you that you want to be seen?

Yes?

Okay, there, big girl.

God she lived across the street public but it's still.

Yeah.

Well wait a minute, you think they close their shades now so that you don't look at them, or because they're peeking at you through the close shape.

They learned their lesson.

They learned their lessons because I don't know if any other half doesn't have what I have.

So maybe they got jealous.

I don't know.

Oh, Zach, I have a question. Do you often have people come over? Do people ever come over to your house? Because I'm not sure what you are officially the buttholer of all furniture?

Yeah, you're but holding your.

Ye but gandhi and listen to this. I actually had a blanket that I put down so I don't hold my own furniture if somebody comes over, because I know there's one person across the hall that I would love to have over.

Yeah, there you go.

Well, look, you know, if you live in New York City and you have the view I have, I see out the other side of my apartment. I see lots of apartments and there's this one guy who's always in the morning, you know, getting ready. He's lights are on because it's dark, you know, because it's like we got up early, and I would just have the corner. I would see him over there walking around naked and nothing to look at really, but I love the fact that he just doesn't care.

You know, what, what are you doing?

Are you?

Are you calling Hay or something? What are you doing?

I'm sorry, I'm a truck driver, so I'm unloading the trailers.

Oh really, what's what's back in the back, what's in the what's in the trailer?

Dollar tree stuff?

Oh?

I love tree? Are you kidding me?

Yeah?

Yeah, God, I wish they actually made a tree made of dollars. That'd be kind of Wait a.

Minute, do you deliver everything naked or you have clothes up?

Well?

I would be arrested for that.

I would love to you know.

That's why I would love to go to Europe, because Europe you could be completely naked and nobody would care.

I know.

You know, we are so so uptight about nudity here because we think, we always think that nudity equals sex, but they don't.

But it doesn't mean it exactly.

No.

I just get really concerned about the buttholing aspect. If that wasn't a walk around naked all day.

Well, you know, what's a shower?

First?

You got a shower first, and then you.

Hope or fill your fail your living room with brown Naga hide furniture.

Oh my gosh.

All right, hey, you know what I gotta tell you, Zach. It's been a lot of fun talking to you. I love you. I hope you have a great day to day, Okay, and uh tell you guys to tell them when it's a dollar store. We said, yo, and have a good day.

All right, We'll do.

Uh.

Lee, she spies on her neighbors. Let's go talk to Lee. I'm twenty three.

Lee.

Once again, We've got questions, who are you spying on? First of all, what is your configuration?

Are you in a high rise or a what kind of window are you looking at in? What's out there?

First of all, hello lady. Second of all, I actually lived in the middle of nowhere, right, But so we've got horse farms on three sides of us. I'm like a tenth to a quarter of a mile away from my neighbors, so we've got a lot of wildlife coming through. We've got pretty high powered binoculars, so we're checking out the deer, we're looking for coyotes, but at the same time we're also catching the neighbors as they go about their daily life. Yes, we're kind of configured in the middle of like three or four different farms. Normally it's just boring stuff. But we did catch the neighbors in the middle of a huge blowout fight that we could actually hear from our house. So we heard the screen. Yeah, quarter mile away and we can hear them carrying on. So of course we went and got the binocular catch anything juicy. But we heard from another neighbor that there was possibly the police involved.

That wants to nothing that day.

But the house is for sale.

Now, oh god, well, God bless we.

Have new people to sigh on soon.

So you know, it's it's kind of funny, Lee, you make me think that.

We're always so paranoid that someone's gonna be hiding microphones in the house or listening to us through our phones and our computers. We stopped, we don't stop to think, well, people could be watching as well, especially if.

You're next door to Lee.

But yeah, so always always understand that if if you can see them, they can see you, and if your curtains are open, you're a fair game.

I guess I don't know.

Lee, I'm so happy I don't live next door to you, but I hope you have a great day, and thank you for listening.

And hello, lady, thank you.

You guys have a great day as well.

All right, take care the Mercedes Benz good morning, by the way, thanks for being on with us. At Mercedes Benz.

There's a reason they go the extra mile from testing their vehicles in desert heat and marked it cold to AI that can anticipate your needs and preferences on the road. They demand every car is worthy of their star because it's Mercedes Benz.

Elvis Da ran in the morning show.

Are we even on?

Elista ran in the Morning show.

You know what, when I think of successful couples, power couples, couples in love, couples that are succeeding as a couple, I think of Danielle and her husband Sheldon.

I did until last night. So Danielle sends me a text Gandhi. It says, Sheldon and I are having a fight. I said, oh God, what about Can you want to call me? She said no, My peeler stopped working and he won't let me buy another one. He says it's the same as a knife, And I said, well, first of all, this is a fight.

Yes, it's a fight. So can you tell everyone if this is the worst fight you've had in a while, while congratulations, this is a this is a good relationship. So your peeler stopped working? What does that mean? It's this doll?

So yeah, it was very dull and I couldn't get like the skin off the cucumber. So I said, hey, I'm making a salad. I'm not putting cucumber in your salad. He's like, why, well, I can't get the skin off of it. I said, so I gotta wait till I get a new peeler. He's like, well, just use the knife. And I'm like what. He's like, you don't use a knife to get the skin off the He said, yes, you do, and then he's talking about how he did it as growing up and I was like, no, I'm like that, No, I need a peeler. And then he called me a damsel and he told me that.

I yeah, He.

Said you don't need you don't need that, and I said, shell, let me text Elvis on this. I need a peeler. And then you texted back that I needed a peeler, and he called you a damsel. So I'm just telling you he called you.

So we went to bed.

He called us both damsels. I'm a face. So okay, I will tell you this though, Danielle in a pinch until until the new peeler arrives. You can use a knife. It's just not as yeah, not as easy.

He could also not have cucumbers until the new thing go wrong.

This is the fight. This is the fight. Yeah. Then he calls his dad, tell them he's in the.

Bed right now if you want him.

But I'm telling you he was.

He was so mad.

I'm like, really, this is what we're fighting about.

Stupid peeler.

I ordered a new piller just so hew much. Yeah, it was like eight dollars a new peeler. I mean, come on, eight dollars whatever.

I do love that he calls a peeler bougie.

Yeah, he said he did.

He says he didn't grow up with a peeler. He doesn't feel like anyone should have a peeler. It's just not necessary, you know.

It's it's if you want to live a true minimalist life, you got to get rid of peelers and things like that. Right.

He was explaining how to cut it like with making like a nex and I'm like, what what, I'm like, I'm so sorry that you were deprived of a peeler. I'm like, really, I'm sorry. I'm like I get it.

Whatever, Yeah, Gandhia, what do you feel about the big major war, the Great War of twenty twenty with a Daniell?

But can be settled in a couple ways. I think maybe he should have showed you.

With the knife how he peeled it so that it was already peeled for you.

And then you could get your peeler and never have to do it again.

Or he could just understand that the peel are super necessary because Danielle I have watched cut a bagel and start spurting blood from the palm of her hand, and I'm not so sure that she should be trusted with knives to peel things.

Oh speak of the crawl out of his crypt called me.

I must be a devil if I have to go without cucumba in my salad, because somebody can't be bothered to just reach for the knife that's four feet away.

Oh shut up.

Whatever, well, I.

Told Danielle, I agree, in a pinch, you can use a knife but of course you can. But you have a problem with her ordering a new peeler. You think she should go on if there's no need for it. She wants a peeler. She wants to make your salard with a peeler. Yes.

The problem is is that Daniel wants that that that QVC thing for everything. So there's a there's a peeler for the cucumber, so she has to have that. She has to have the special uh pizza rollly thingy instead of just cutting the crust of the pizza with the knife as well, so.

Now you need a pizza count for the pairing knife can cut the crust of the pizza.

To desperate, she has the little ROLLI pizza gus to go, won't give out. Hold on, guys, you can't have your dinner. I have to go and find another rolly thing because otherwise I can't cut the triangle of the pizza. Has to have the QBC thing and of course go to our checking account at the same time, shop right now, okay still comes from our checking account, whereas we have a nice sharp.

Pairing knife that can do the same thing. That's ridiculous. And by the way, and by the.

Way, this choice was to make sure that you could order a new Peela other than satisfy aforementioned husband with a cucumber that was literally in front of her. And she picked up my cucumber and put it back in the fridge uncut.

Okay, well, at that point it's an argument, it's not even a conversation. But let me ask you this. How come you just can't wash the cucumber and eat it on peel? You can eat a cucumber with a peel on it, you can. I agree.

I like cucumber in the nice mozzarella salad. But the problem is somebody thinks it's a sin to cut it and put it there so that the friendly husband can enjoy salad more.

Okay, well, so is the cucumber still in the refrigerator the same cuts? Yes, and it's not in my belly? All right? Hold, I gotta call here.

The peeler's coming today.

Good you got a peeler. There's nothing wrong with gadgets. I love gadgets. Danielle with It Line twenty fourth Gary Nancy, Hi, Nancy.

Good morning guys.

Nancy, uh, and good morning to you. Uh the peeler did you grow up with or without a peeler and talk about that. Let's get deep on this.

I grew up, I'm beinncan So.

I grew up Spanish.

My mom used to make us peel potatoes anything with knives. I grew up, got my own place, and I bought a peeler, and I am sorry never going back to Knights ever again.

I bought my home peeler.

I'm like, lady, you've been suffering for years. You made us suffer.

No, thank you, Yes, send on Sheldon.

Sorry, see Sheldon, thank you. She uses the word suffer.

I hear you, and and I appreciate the fact that it might be easier. But if your husband loved a salad with a chunk or two of cucumber in it and you had no pila, would you make a fullmentioned husband suffolk with no queue mba because you just were insistent on waiting for a peela to arrive from Amazonella.

But on this one, I'm with Sheldon because I know how to use the knife.

Thank you. You're not telling me.

You're not telling me I can't pio.

No, that's fine, all right, on the Tuesday night, Okay, get the knife, call hold on, hold on, Nancy, thank you for your call.

Thank you, but you too. I must bring this one thought in here from a texter. Oh, listen to Sheldon throwing a fit over an eight dollars peeler, the guy who bought a squirrel picnic table feeder.

Okay, but what are we now saying that we can't save the squirrel population?

That guy couldn't exactly, thank you?

And you know what, Elvis in his salad he had, he had avocado, he had a spare what else did you have?

But he wanted you? Thank you all right? And cucumber was there?

Whatever?

And you know what, he bought a stupid avocado cutter that I don't even use.

That avocado cutter is fabulous. You can't do the slices without that.

She can, No, you can't. Yes, she came with a knife, the knife that you didn't use on the cucuver. Yes, Kandhi, what do you think could one.

Argue if the cucumber was that important and Danielle was not able to cut it with the knife, We're not comfortable that perhaps Sheldon should have cut it himself.

You could argue that, oh, absolutely.

However the problem is is that the bowl came downstairs and was handed to me, and cucumber was back upstairs, and I wasn't told that there was a cucumber.

I was given the salad. Here you go, here's your salad. Okay, great, Later on, Oh what happened? No cucumber. Oh yeah, we have cucumber. I just didn't want to cut it with a knife. I was waiting for a slice of Okay. Well, you know, in closing, I think, okay, we probably exhausted this. Yes we have, we have. I do want to say, now, what kind of feeder did you buy? What kind of animals that? Can you say that? Say that word squirrel? Say it again, a squirrel? Scary? Say it? Squirrel? Squirrel? What's yeah? He's it's it's two syllables. You're just like me. Squirrel, squarel square, he comes to a squirrel. I want to hear squirrel scary. You and Sheldon battle this one out. I want to listen. Okay, squirrel, squirrel square, It's not square. It has the air. I'm not scary. I'm not saying squarel. It's not squarel. It's a squirrel. You said squirrel, square, squirrel, It's not a squirrel. Yes, square, it is a squirrel. It's a square. It's not a squirrel. Scary, ok not a squirrel. Hold on, scary, squirrel. Hold on now, scary, says squirrel, squirrel, And you say squirrel. Squirrel, squirrel, squire, squirrel, squirrel. Okay, squirrel. My queen taught me how to say it. I didn't teach you how to say anything. But it's not a squirrel. Okay, okay, okay, okay, Thank you all. I love you, Sheldon. Yes, I'm sure someone does my life. Doesn't. She wouldn't cut my cucumb. Behind know she did not. Did not satisfy your cucumber.

Thank you. Thank you for coming in. It was a pleasure hearing your point of view.

Oh sure it what? Thank you very much. All Right, have a good day. I'm gonna go and get a cucumber. Yeah yeah, Oh lord, that just wore me out. I feel like I just pushed a baby out of my regina. Is that what it feels like?

Yep?

Oh, this is interesting, called Matt. Someone on line twenty three. Let's get to this.

Hello, Matt, Hey.

I agree. Well I'm doing fine, but I agree you shouldn't really have to use a knife to cut a pizza. How do you cut a pizza.

With a pizza cutter?

Yeah, pizza cutter? Oh someone else? Someone else? It said, the use scissors. Yes, pizza scissors in my house.

Yes, of course you do.

I'm sitting in the driver at Dunkin Donuts and I'm thinking, who puts the damn pizza with their with a knife.

I don't know.

I use I use that that sharp rown wheel on the stick, the pizza cutter. I guess it's called a pizza cutter. This is fancy name for it. All right, Well, thank you, Matt enjoy your duncan. I'm jealous. I wish I had something to have a good day.

Okay, and there you go.

Hello, Hello.

Elvis ter Ran in the Morning show. Elvis ter Ran in the Morning Show.

I just looked up.

I was looking at banana peels out windows.

Litter or not. According to the State of Florida, this is the first example I found. It is illegal.

You cannot throw anything out your window. The fine for littering is one hundred and eighty dollars.

I thought it was one thousand dollars in some places.

Okay, Well, because it add nutrients to the soil, Well.

No, no, that's not the argument. The argument is is is it littering? Okay, so here's an example. Okay, this is a little different. So you know when I take little MAXI for a walk and he makes pooh, right, I have little pooh bags, and I and I pick up his poo. And you know, every corner, every street corner in New York City has a trash can.

I throw the pooh bag in the trash can.

Sometimes I even like tie it into a knot, so like if someone comes by looking for dinner, you know, I'm like, hey, exactly. So I learned yesterday this is against the law. We're supposed to take the dog poo home and flush it down the toilet.

Really, oh, that is a long way to go.

Litter baskets are intended for pedestrian litter, where canine waste may be placed in the litter baskets, This is not their primary purpose. Dog wakkers should not be placing canine waste on or in another residence receptacles.

But blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Anyway, so I've been I've been breaking the law, just like Brody does when he throws his banana pealed in the woods. Same thing.

It's it's your throat for the wood. The litter laws are you not? You're not supposed to throw anything out the window?

What uh? Frog?

I got yelled at. There's a lake behind my house, and so the dog when the dogs were going pooh, I was just flinging the poo in the lake. There's alligators that poop in the lake. Why is the dog pooh bad for the lake? Because right, yeah, it's still pooh. You should only live in your own pooh.

Mom always said, alligators don't want to swim in your dog's pooh.

It's fertilization problem. You're fertilizing a pond.

I sorted to throw dog poo in the lake instead of putting in my garbage cannon. It smells like pooh.

Okay, so okay, Well, let's go back to the biodegradable thing that Scary and Brodie are talking about. Leave it to them, the Brooklyn guys, the Brooklyn boys, to be the bugs in the room. It could be bio agradable that, but the argument is you are throwing its quality of life.

You're throwing crap on the ground where it shouldn't be. That's all.

My argument is there's a lot of things that are illegal, and these laws that are in existence, but we don't follow them.

There are certain things right, but no, no, no, you cannot. You cannot justify your way out of this bag. If there's a law, it's a law. Period.

They said you can't throw them out the window. What if I open the door and lay it on the ground.

Okay, you know what I'm saying, don't start. First of all, I throw mine out the moon roof.

Second of all, there are sodomy laws in many states in this country and we all do it.

What what? That's what I'm saying. I like how you're saying that while you're standing behind guns.

Mforble.

It is literally.

Look if by walking down the street and I see a banana peel next to the sidewalk or in the bushes whatever, to me, I'm like, oh God, what a pig.

That is littering a.

Phone number in my phone to report people who littered because it makes me so crazy, and I would call in license plates. I don't think they actually did anything about it, but it was me at my most crazy.

What are you saying here? O, scary?

Someone just texted in what if I spit out the seed of an orange or an apple while I'm driving, is that littering to or?

You know what?

If I let me ask you a question, why are we spitting or throwing anything out.

Of a window?

Bring a garbage bag?

Bring a garbage bag with you, or a tissue.

The window? Is that? Is that litteringly? If I fling a booger out the window.

Putting anything out the window, don't.

Fling your boogers, you know? And another person pulled over for flinging boogers. You should So.

Someone just send in a text saying that you throw banana peels and apple remnants or whatever outside a window.

Some birds of prey can choke on them.

You know, you don't throw crap out your window.

You wouldn't if you wouldn't do it in your home, don't do it outside. I don't understand people don't follow that. I think some people will do it at their home.

All right, have have we exhausted this enough? We have not exhausted this.

We learned who the real Neanderthals in the room are today?

Who says don't do it outside if you don't do it in your home. I take my dogs outside the pee. I don't want to pee in the house. I mean, there's a difference.

You can let your dog p outside, but maybe you should let them do it in your toilet.

And didn't have windows. They didn't a whole different set of rules.

Don't answer the phone, Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone tappen.

I'm scary, give us a good phone tab.

So let me emailed us wanting to phone tap his neighbors, James and a Lane.

So this erotic sex toy.

Store opened up in this trip wall parking lot in the neighborhood, and the entire community is up in arms about it, especially Jeames in the lane. So they've left messages.

For the sex toy owner. And I'm going to pretend to be see what Scary's phone taps about. This is what's different.

I left about four messages, William a grind out. How long did they get to get back to somebody? You've got that six toy story in a skip mall. What the hell's the matter with you?

There's nothing the matter with me.

The same way with these other businesses living their American dream, I'm living mine.

It's all about capitalism.

American dream. This is a nice little suburban community. People enjoy sex in the privacy of their own homes, not out on the streets. You got this stuff right out.

On there's nothing in the streets walking.

Show me where there's something in the street. I got tinted windows.

How about the flyers you put on people's windshields. You think the kids don't pick those up?

And look it up?

That was for a promotion we were doing called slippery Saturdays.

Your thread on thin ice, miss sir. If you don't shut that place down voluntarily, I will make sure that it gets shut down. And that's not a threat, that's a promise. Okay, you don't know what you're dealing with here.

I have just as much right to be here as Chipotle does.

I got that guy from the sex porn in the strip, not a porn star.

Hello, Hi, I listen.

You don't know you're really making a disruption to this neighborhood.

As a mother, do you know what it's.

Like to walk past and have a thirteen year old girl ask me what van white balls are.

Tell her it's a big girl necklace.

Don't tell to watch that. You'll talk to my wife.

I got a little boy going to jimberee and he's looking in there and there's a strap on sticking up. I got a tell them that an elephant knows for Halloween costume.

This is what I'm telling my kids.

Well, you know what you get a Mother of the Year award.

Congratulations, the superhero weapons, Well you're.

Supposed to do. Let's get creative with the kids.

Look, I'm not saying you can't have your sex shop, but you have it in some deserted lot somewhere.

You don't have it next to a dunkin Donuts.

Well, Thursday is TBT touch, But Thursdays.

I'm telling you to watch your mouth when you talk to my wife.

Why are you coming? And look around and let me.

Tell you something listing. The last person you want in there is me because I'll break your knee capture if I come in here.

You hear me. Let's just get off the phone.

With this guy. I don't want to put I don't even want to make the action that I gotta take.

It's no longer than you.

I don't know what for me.

Okay, what are you gonna do?

You'll know when my boat is three quarters up?

You're okay, perfect?

You know I'm recording this, so anything you say it will be held against you in a court of law.

How about that?

Oh fight my well, are you recording that you're doing some fun of children.

And stuff like that.

You're not getting any business in there.

I look, there's nobody in there at two in there.

You look.

Ill, wait a second, you look. You have been here.

Now I'm there with my kids and we're looking there, and there's nobody in.

There, nobody reading. It's not dying in there. You're dying in there.

All right, Well, if you want me to.

Close up, I have to talk to my number one investor to see if he wants to move.

Good idea, you do that. You're your number one investor.

His name is Elvis, Elvis Duran.

Oh both he Updn't need that crappy radio person.

Just make an excuses.

I'm gonna tell him that you've been phone tapped. My god, this is scary Jones. Your neighbor Lenny put me up to this. Said you complained to.

The time, Leny and go kick his heads.

The Elvis Duran phone tap.

This phone table was pre recorded with permission granted by authartiyas.

The Elvis dan phone tab only on Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. What Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

Go ahead and tell everyone what you're raving about. I'm telling you it changed my life. Go ahead.

It's I'm almost forty and I finally got a water pick.

I hate flossing, right, I hate it. I absolutely hate it. But he's going on and on. Nate hasn't He hasn't stopped once today about this friggin water Yeah.

Yeah, So I hate flossing, and every time I go to the dentist, my dentist says, why don't you get a water pick? It's not It's like flossing but better. So finally I just buckled because I was getting some black build up here and I bought this water pick off of Amazon. I'm telling you how much ary forty dollars changed my life. It's like every time I use I look forward to brushing my teeth.

This is how much I like it, Like I look for it every time. Yeah, are they paying you to say no, I'm not. Seriously, I paid my own money. What a scam. If we just came in here and we just took money under the table.

I would If they want to pay me, I'll gladly take it, because this thing would change my life.

It's a legal for.

You to come on the show and talk about something without divulging that you're getting paid for it.

I'm not getting paid for it. I paid my own money for it. But seriously, every time I brush my teeth now, it's like going to the dentist for a clean.

We used to have a water pick fights because you can shoot water and you can do that too. And you know the thing.

Anybody that doesn't have a water pick, I'm gonna give you a little lesson right now. Make sure you close your lips around it before you use it.

That's what I was taught because because if you just have your mouth over it and use a water pick, it sprays every Yeah, it gets all. You know what, I'm going to go to Amazon. I don't buying one.

Seriously, Oh buy the forty dollars one, because there's more expensive ones. But the one that was that's forty bucks.

You don't need it. You don't need the fans. You don't need the fans, don't need the catch. Okay, So the question what under fifty dollars has changed your life?

I'll go even cheaper, Okay, you know what I love, and I can't buy enough of them. They're called compeede. I think, oh, you wear them because I don't wear socks, the things that Danielle had that you stole from her. Yes, yeah, I don't like to wear socks, especially in the summertime. And so by the way, my feet don't smell, as I do not have stinky feet, okay, and so but.

I just don't like socks. So these these compeede things, you know, I just put put one on the side of my foot and there's no blisters. It's great. It's like fifteen dollars from box boxes of them back there. But I know, I look, but you see, you don't have to spend a billion dollars to find something that changes your life. So it's water picks, it's compeede. There you go, all kinds of stuff. What cheap stuff has changed your life under under fifty dollars.

Under fifty I mean, there's obviously, you know, an ethha.

Weed, but I won't say that, I will actually say a product. So Danielle actually went to the Crayola factory not too long ago, and she came back with this chapstick that is this big fat crayon and I love it. It is the greatest chapstick of my life. So I thought this has to be expensive. She got it from the Crayola factory. I went online and googled it. You can get like an eight pack for eleven bucks.

Awesome. Love it?

Change your life, change my life? That's some scary. I have two things.

One is the this plastic mirror with suction cups on it that I got at Tarje.

You put it in the shower, your shaving mirror, my shaving mirror. I shave in the shower now.

I never was able to do that until I had the mirror with the suction cups. And the other thing and or green, is called the orgreenic pan frying pan. You don't have to use any butter you're so excited, spray or nothing. You could just like throw eggs in the damn thing and they'll cook perfectly and perfect egg every time.

With no oil. And by the way, the smell of your breath. You need to borrow Nate's water pitch.

Oh.

Oh, another thing, the squatty potty.

I've seen these in action, yes, I've seen them at work. You put the little things you put your feet on.

Basically little footool around bottom of your toilet, and.

They're saying that it makes you. It makes you pooh better.

Yes, changes your posture so the pooh comes out faster. And people have sworn that they actually like got all of the gunk out of their intestines. My friend's dad said he lost fifteen pounds with a squatty potty.

Has happened to me?

He swears we could call him right now. I bet he'll say, yeah, I definitely did love that thing.

I've heard from many people to a squatty potty is something every bathroom needs.

It expresses your export process.

Wait, iay got to Amazon right now and order a squatty potty at a water pit.

Yes, so the squad one is just a stool. It's not an actual potty. No, it's just a basically it makes you. It elevates your feet off the ground. So they're like they're.

Like this, Yeah, you're just so differently like stirrups.

See, it changes the trajectory. Yep, it really does of your missile.

It just speeds up the process, you know, it.

Just go go to squatty potic amazing.

So yeah, bottom lines, you don't have to spend a ton of money to enjoy something that share it with friends.

No.

Oh, yes, producer Sam, but I.

Have two of them because you guys know I'm riddled with skin issues.

Yes, so I found some really good stuff.

I use these little patches called peace out acne and you just pop put it on a white head and it sucks the white head out by morning. It's like under twenty dollars I get at Sephora, and the other one is biooil. It's like a scar thing because I am a picker by nature, so I leave scars. I know it's bad, but the bioil is like fifteen bucks on Amazon, and it's such a good thing to remove scars.

I love cheap stuff, love it, love it. Hey, uh, switching gears. I want to talk to Ali.

Of course, anything and everything social media on our show is Ali, and you're doing the best job ever. We love you.

Can we call her digitally digitally.

Good.

Okay, we're working on that for a while.

So Ali, it's always fun to talk to about her dating life. You do have an adventurous dating life.

I try.

I overheard you having a conversation. You know me when I overhear it.

We're going to bring it in. We're going to talk about it. You're you're online dating? Which site is it on hinge?

Right now?

That's like the in one. But listen to what she's doing. Gandhi helped me with this.

I think she's manipulating a little too much for this guy.

She's trying to pick up.

What are you doing?

So I have a crush on this guy, and I'm using Hinge to try and match with him to see if he is into me, and I want to ask me out. So I changed my settings to be his age and my preference to his religion and his location.

Oh so you're like defrauding him basically, you're not the same religion.

No, we are the same.

You are the same religion. Okay, okay, just his age?

Yeah, how old is he?

He's twenty four?

Okay, so you and you know for a fact he's on Hinge as well.

I don't know for a fact, but but if I have all these things, I should be able to find him in like forty eight hours.

Okay, So you are what else have you done on your hinge whatever profile to match him?

So I changed my religion right, and well, Now, I didn't change my religion. I just made it so it's a like game changer if it's.

Not that religion, right, Okay.

And then I changed my location be close to him, and then I made it a mile radius so that he has to be the mile.

Cyber stalking a little bit, a little bit. It's like if you knew where he lives and you just.

Stod outside his house every day.

Hey kind of.

But on the apps, okay, you.

Sound like you're a It sounds like you're a member of the military and you're sending drones over to like like shoot shoot up his compound.

I have met you?

Are you are narrowing it down to just him? So wait, wait, wait you've met him.

Yeah, I met him, and I have a crush on him.

Why don't you just tell him I have a crush on you. Just go out.

Because that I'll get maybe rejected.

I don't want to.

I'm scared it's gonna be so much weirder now if he hears this and then still doesn't go for it.

Was if you just met him in person, you just could have gotten rejected.

And all the stuff you're lying about, I mean you you basically are lying to get him to notice you.

On I'm not lying.

I'm just telling the app what I prefer, and it's everything that's him.

Is he like on Instagram?

Yeah?

Want you just slide into his dms on Instagram and say hi, because that's.

I have his number.

She's afraid she'll be rejected.

She's afraid she'll be rejected this way, either he goes for her or if he doesn't.

If he doesn't, it's not a rejection.

Exactly.

If I see he matches with me on Hinge, then I know he's interested in me too.

But you said I think he's on Hinge.

Yeah, I don't actually know.

But wait, no, no, no, no, he's not going to be interested in you. He's going to be interested in this person that you're trying to make yourself debate that you're not.

Well, I am all those things.

Yes, I agree with you, Elvis. This is false pretenses.

You can't create this person and then go match with someone.

And I'm a person. I'm just telling the app what I'm looking.

At a different color.

So she's basically turning to say, like, if this was the grocery store, you've just moved your product to, like a better place, so that he can see you're you're in capping him.

I think you're brilliant for this. First of all, this is what's gonna get your foot in the door. It's gonna buy you more time and conversation, and I think then he'll get to know the real you afterwards, and then you could laugh in the end about how I remember in the beginning when I was just trying to you.

Know, remember I stocked you and made up my whole life. You know, we're on the.

Stage right now where it's like like does he like me? Does he not like me? Is he gonna ask me on? Is he not gonna ask me out? So I'm just moving along the process a little fast.

Yeah, but it seems like it would just be way easier if you got the answer, like hit him up, Hey, what's going on?

Do you want to hang out?

Let me get the answer, versus he might be on hinge. So maybe you're never going to know and you'll just be left in this like kurget time.

First.

That's the thing I don't understand. He you don't even know if he's on hinge.

No, but everyone's on hinge, I mean also not sponsored.

Okay, all right, so.

I do know he's single.

So is he all you know about this? Poor guy? And location? Do you have a mutual friend?

We do?

I know his roommate.

Okay, why don't you just get his roommate to like set you up?

So I did kind of do that.

Oh how did that work? How do you kind of do that? Either you do or you don't. You're like, how did you manipulate his roommate into helping you?

I use my dog?

Yeah, it's good plan. Wait a second.

I saw her posting with a dog on the weekend, and I was like, this is weird.

I never really see Allie with a dog, And now I get it. That's awesome. It's cute dog.

So I texted the roommate. The roommate's not from the city or the so I know he like kind of misses home. I was like, listen, like, my dog is coming in on Saturday, like into the city. Why don't we meet up and have like a dog play date and like you can hang out with the dog in that way, like you know.

So I so you're trying every approach rather than like the one that's guaranteed to give you answers faster, which is like just contact him.

Well, I have to see him every week at mud of my extracurricular activities.

So is it soccer? Yeah?

What Yeah?

Alway plays soccer.

She's been trying to get me to play, but I'm never available when she wants to play.

But I'm interested. Yes, I'm a.

Nice soccer to meet boys and I met this boy.

Wait.

Wait, so you don't play soccer because you're like soccer. You play soccer just to meet boys.

No, I actually do really like playing, but I just so happened to be with a lot of single men and I had to leave my last team because I was dating the captain of that team.

So you see him every week. You see him every week at soccer. Yeah, it is kind of stalkers a little bit, but in.

The cute way.

You're a cute stalker.

Our friend Tommy Dedario hosts I've never said this before. It's a podcast where he interviews our favorite actress and artists.

Tommy, who's on the podcast this week.

Oh it is so good to be with you, Elvis.

I have actor Anthony K. Vaughan on the show today now.

He stars an Exo Kitty on Netflix, and he opens up about how he almost said no to doing the show.

You don't want to miss it. I've never said this before. New episodes every Tuesday.

Listen on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Thread.

This is Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

So one day we're sitting on an airplane and the guy comes on and says, you know that the flight attendant okay, we're now in a buckle up, and this and that, and then he says, all right, as we have asked you, please turn off all cell phones, you must go to airplane mode. Now I see on my meter or here that four of you have not done it yet. We now know that four of you have not turned on your airplane mode. And I'm thinking to myself, this guy is a liar. Yeah, he is full of quack. But you know, as as soon as he said that, all the dummies on the plane started looking at the oh oh oh god, he's not on his meter.

Yeah.

I could see Elvis at that moment taking flight mode off his phone and being like, let's see if he says, phoney, oh.

Did you just get an ext one on your meter?

I love that.

So the question is, and I'm going to give you an example in a moment of how we lie to you or how radio has been lying to you all these years. You're not supposed to give this, so, uh, you.

Know, how do you lie to people in your business? We have this thing and it really isn't happening as much now as it was in the past. We say, hey, if you want to hear a song, call us. Now, well you wouldn't call us.

Oh I need to play that, and I'm putting the computer and play because John from from Babylon called and wanted to hear it.

Right.

No, but we what we do do sometimes a lot of times it will tabulate. So if we get one hundred calls for uh Ariana Grande today, we know that song is very popular. We need to play it more. But when you call and request it, I'm not playing it just for you, And that's a radio lie.

But you think it's just for you when it comes on, you get so excited and go, oh.

My gosh, it's my request.

I was definitely the person who used to be like, oh, call with a request, I'm calling right now. And then I would call and nobody would ever play what I wanted them to play. But the DJ would always say I'm gonna play it, and they never did.

We'll get right on that.

Yeah, thanks guys.

All right, I need to know more lies anyone from any other any other industries.

Trying to think when I worked in fast food, what we used to sell people?

I think, Well, so one thing I know we used to do when I worked in a restaurant was we would make pretty much almost always decaf coffee because we didn't want to accidentally mix it up because you know, servers will go back and forth and not necessarily pay attention, so we never wanted to give people caffeine that weren't.

Supposed to have caffeine.

So it's just crack decaf across the board.

Yeah, but what if I needed that to keep awake in my car and I wound up having a car accident home because that was a sleep.

Go to a restaurant so they can focus.

Go to a coffee place. We were good at salad bars.

Wait, Ghani is another one.

I have another one. When I was a bartender and we used to make drinks for people.

Sometimes they would come back and be like, there's not enough alcohol in here, what's going on with this drink? So we would put just a little bit of alcohol in the straw, so when they took the sip, it hit like a ton of bricks.

Now I hate you.

I think a lot of pit ices do that.

It was then a lot of places.

Do that live I'm putting alcohol.

No, they just do that to begin with.

They put alcohol in the straw, so you think there's more in the drink than there really is.

Hits you like train bam, and I'm like, how do you like that drink? No, it's the same drink.

We used to tell people of fast food restaurants.

No, that didn't fall on the floor before I.

Starved that story. That was about the guy that put his scrot him in someone's salad.

Oh, it was a salsa.

It was a salsa. He put his it was scrolled him salsa.

Why did he do that? Because he's an idiot?

Because he could.

Was he mad?

Yeah, he was upset.

It was a delivery thing, like one of the delivery services, and he dipped his boys in the salsa and he recorded it and.

Then yeah, I don't need you tea bag at my salsaa.

Did somebody do that to you either your salad or scary sala?

Didn't tea great tea, claimed scary salad, and then he.

Ate it and we took videos.

All right, But anyway, but we lied about it, all right. We got liars calling.

All our listeners.

Let's go talk to Betty line eighteen. Hey Betty, how are your So we were lying about Betty. Let's go talk to Mark on fifteen high Mark, how are you?

Hi?

Hello lady, Hello lady.

All right, what do you do for a living? Are you the liar or do you know of a lying industry?

Well?

I am the liar. I'm a college student. But on the weekends I worked from a production company and I worked the photo booth. And all the time, you know, people come up to the photo booth and they want to take a picture, but only two strips of the pictures come out. So they're always asked me, oh, can you please, you know, print out more. I'm like, listen, I have to shut down the system. I can't just come back at the end of the night. I promise I will print out more. Oh, thank you so much, Okay, And by the end of the night they just forget. And you know, it's a funny line.

I don't have to do anything.

Oh they all get drunk and don't come back, all right. See, but you just want to You just want to preserve you want to preserve your sanity, and you just don't want to sit there and wait on them all day. What's the funny part.

The funny thing is that you would think that the old people are forgetting. It's the old people that always remember to come back at the end of the night. All the young people, they're all too drunk to remember.

Yep, that's usome. I mean that's I'm all but drunk. So I'm both. Thank you very much, Mark, I appreciate it. I love you too. Oh my god, all of these people texting in these are the funny ones. My favorite was she was a therapist and she says, every time I tell someone, oh, it's all gonna be all right, I'm lying. Oh my god, she says, I don't know. I don't know the outcome. That's right, I just lie to them. Oh it's to be.

You have to say that. You can't say, oh, your life semester, there's no hope for you. I mean, you can't say that.

And what about it.

If you're a lawyer, you're supposed to lie. Yeah, No, maybe bend the truth. I don't know. Let's go talk to UH line eight. It's John. Oh, he works in sales. There you go, Hey John, how are you?

Hey?

I'm good. How are you guys doing okay? So you're in sales and so you have to bend the truth from time to time.

I do pretty much on a daily basis. It's not too much of a you know, extended lie, but I basically, you know, we have quarterly promotions, and I basically tell all my clients know this promotion's ending at the end of the day. Sometimes they'll create my own promotions.

You have to be back today, that kind of thing.

It's it's not too much, but I pretty much get my way and I exceed myself quoder quorders.

So there you go.

You know, is that the same as when you see those commercials selling hand cream and says you only have thirty seconds to call this number.

No, yes, yeah, And.

When you're online and you go to buy something on like Amazon's it says only four left.

That's bs because.

Then I go check it again and it says only six left.

All right, thank you, John. Hold one second, Hold on second, let's go talk to Maddie. Online twenty four. Uh you work in retail, Maddie.

Maddy, Hi guys, yeah.

Yeah, okay, were you selling what clothing?

Or I used to work.

At baths and Bodyworks?

So oh okay, so we give this to the place, all right? So h and what was the permissible lie at bath and Bodyworks?

Well, it's not just a Bath and body Works. I know for a fact that it happens at other stores too, just for my friends. But anytime that someone asked us to go check in the back, nine times out of ten we would just kind of go back and eat food or check our phone.

Rude, because what you always knew, you always knew there was nothing in the back.

Well, they always sent us really weird amounts of products, so we would have eight thousand types of one product, and the one that they were looking for is that everyone was looking for. We never had.

Enough, see, And I want to thank the people in Target because the other day I was looking for something specific and the lady said, oh, I think a box just arrived, and she actually went in the back, opened the box and brought it out.

Maddie, Look, someone has something in the back.

Yeah.

I always felt too bad to not do that. So I was the only person who would ever go back and actually look for something. But I know that my coworkers never did.

Always wonder.

I always wonder, like, what's in the back. You have like a warehouse back there filled with all the stuff that's not in the front.

Yeah, I think they do.

I think when they tell you, oh, we only have what's out, I think it's bs they've got stuff in the back.

All right. My other favorite one and.

Every time I got too every time I go to buy a car or something like that, Maddie, they'll always say, well, let me go check with the manager.

Going to check with the manager.

Yeah, they may They're going there and just talk for a minute.

Okay, well listen, Maddie, thank you for calling.

Let's go finally talk to a mic online.

Now, Hey Mike, Hey, guys, good morning, good morning. What exactly is the big ginger ale scam? The ginger ale scam?

Oh yeah, oh yeah, So hold on, guys, this is going to blow your mind.

Now.

You can work in the restaurants and diners, and ginger all is not a big ticket item, so a lot of restaurants don't carry it. So when you order it, they pour a glass of sprite with a splash of coke just to give it the color. And there goes your ginger ale.

Really. Oh see, so I don't get that crispy ginger flavor.

Yeah, you're getting the lemon flavor with a little bit of coke.

Wow, all the lies we've learned about today, this is the most frightening frightening.

I had one customer who saw me doing this and coc in there for me.

Busted, Mike, Excellent. Now, nice to know. Next time I order a ginger ale, I'm gonna say, don't make.

It a spread.

That's all right?

Let them know, all right, all these lives you can't Yeah, what are you gonna do? You should see some of these going by. I can't even Yeah a nurse, I'm a nurse. My lie is, Oh no, this won't hurt a bit.

Yeah, we all know that.

I've experienced that. I think I know her.

This will pinch just a little bit.

This hurts you more than it's gonna hurt me.

Yeah.

No, My mom and dad told me that lie all the time.

Ever wondered what we look like?

Do you think I look in bed?

I do Follow us.

On Instagram at Elvis Duran show. Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. This is Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

Anyone see any ghost? I saw the kid. I saw the kid popping up in the window again yesterday.

Oh no, yeah, I've seen him before.

Yeah.

We still don't know if it's a little boy or a little girl with a pixie haircut or not sure.

Do they just appear and then go away? Do they do anything?

Like?

What is it?

No, it's just like it's the head and windows. All of a sudden, it just dropped down.

Goodbye, now look at it.

Yeah.

No, you don't have to burn the place down. That's the only opertion.

I'm not going to burn down my house and it doesn't happen.

I'm telling you everyone I know who's experienced a ghost like I have experienced a ghost. I've experienced two of them. You're not scared when you see them. For some reason, you think you're gonna be scared, But when you actually see one, it's not scary.

Unless you've seen a ghost. You don't know what I'm talking about. You've seen one, haven't you, Danielle.

No, I've experienced things and they didn't scare me. Like in my mom's house. I was on the staircase trying to go downstairs, and something wasn't going to let me go downstairs.

It just stopped me.

I couldn't go any further, and so I just turned around and went the.

Other direction, like no problem.

You know, little things is sounds and all kinds of stuff.

Oh God, that's reading a story from a friend of mine. Used to live in a condo. All the units were connected and his neighbor was a good friend. One day he told me that the cleaning lady that they both shared saw a spirit in the middle of his living room, and she says it was a little Spanish man who looked like a construction worker. He jokingly told the maintenance guy, who freaked out because he said a worker did die while they were building the units. And now they're both freaked out, but couldn't wait to see the ghost again. The ghost never came back, so they were ghosted by a ghost.

Oh that's Danny.

It's like, my philosophy is this, if you really want to see the ghost, the ghost isn't common, right, It's when you least expect it out of the corner of your eye and you're like, oh, I saw you I always.

Just want to like, no, do they want something? Why are you still here?

Can I help you get to where you need to go so that we don't have to see you anymore?

What is going on?

Yeah? I don't know. I wish I do you hire someone?

Is it?

Are those people real?

They can come in here and they here's why that little kid is in your house? Or when did they can make up anything?

When my mom when my dad was passing away, a priest came over to my mom's house to pray with us. And he came in the house and he said to my mom, do you have any holy water? And my mom was like, why he sent something in the house, but he wouldn't exactly say what it was. And he went and he blessed the whole house with holy water, and he was and he started asking questions about.

This happened in the house.

Do you want to hear any.

Stories about this?

So he just got this feeling that there was something that shouldn't be there, that was there.

I don't know, Danielle, if a priest gets nervous in your house, maybe yeah, what do you know that you're not telling me?

I know when we watched that movie insidious last night. So now you know, I get a little scared in my own house. But when you see the ghost, you're not scared. And some people are texting and saying we're you know, we're calling BS on the ghost thing.

No, I'm serious. There's a little ghost, a little kid, I kid you not. I guess I should make more out of it. I should be more scared and frightened and alarmed, but I'm not.

We had that one. Well, why am I afraid of them?

Yeah?

Because I don't really know anything about them, which I think is why we're usually afraid of things, right, because you don't have a good grasp of what it is. But when we had the woman come in, her name was Julie Rieger. I don't know if you guys remember, but she dealt with like paranormal activity. She wrote a whole book about it. She used to be a movie producer. She came in and we were talking about my sleep, sleep paralysis, and she pulled me aside and she was like, as soon as I saw you, there were all kinds of things, spirits, beings that are attached to you. And she gave me this pile of rocks and crystals, and all kinds of stuff to keep by my bed. Because she was like, I see it, it's all over. You don't worry, you're not crazy. It's everywhere.

I was like, h get it away. Whatever they are.

Oh, I think it's kind of interesting. For instance, if a house has something going on that makes it an interesting house to me. Otherwise it's just I do I think so too.

I think it's cool.

Yeah, I don't know. Reese is on twenty four. Yes, you have a ghost a kid in your house.

Yeah.

My parents they actually built the house in two thousand and as the house was being built, so they came over. We were out of town, so they came over and saw the little boy and called to see if they left one of the kids at home, and they said no. But you know, we've had a lot of calls that there's been a little boy running around the house. And then after the house was built years later, you can hear toys going off in the basement and you can see a little boy run across the balcony and everything.

Wow. Do they have any idea where this where the kid came from? And why the kid's there?

No idea?

Wow, you just don't know.

But you know, when you see movies like Insidious, it's it's the people who are haunted, not the house like you like so Gandhi, you have all these dead people hanging on you.

You're you're the problem here.

They are there with me right now. I know it's me.

I don't know. All right, Ray, thank you for listening. And to tell the kid, we said, hey, what's up? That's all right? Bye? Uh yeah.

Because when I owned that house in Jersey, that other house construction workers wouldn't even come in and work. They would freak out and leave, and they didn't even know each other. They would all independently be freaked out by this house cool. And that's where I experienced something as well. I don't know, you know how to explain it?

Don't answer the phone, Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone tap?

What's the phone tap all about?

There?

So Jeffy wants to play a phone tap on her boyfriend Darren. Now Darren does overnights, gets home and goes straight to sleep. So we decided let's give Darren some wake up calls with the little Saint Patrick's date flair to it?

All right, what could go wrong? Let's see here we go. Wow, I specially Saint Patri's Day, missing crapper. I'm a lipric corn and I'm a mean green wrapper. Back in Ireland they called me liprick crapper. I put a door to the end of your rainbow ferry you on my brain?

Yo, got a green coat, You got the scuffy red beer sucked on your schle That was weird.

Hello.

Hello, I'm the lipriate crapper.

And the back of again on Saint Patty's dad.

Let me be your friends up to your way. You locked this monster to capture met.

Maximum power can lead you to dwighten you?

Is this Darren coping?

Man?

It's Saint Patty's Day, Darren, I'll give you three wisks.

Do you know my day?

Man?

You'll hear funny?

Dude? What whatever you're doing that's funny today?

If you think it's.

Funny, I did it.

Wake me up and I got another thing covered for you.

Dude, hye by, why are you.

Walk the door work?

Kick your act.

Against the wall.

If you keep calling this, put your.

Head to bol Do you understand me?

I know the pitch is but you called me almost prod your dad, So I'm.

Happy to say I'll keep you three wiks, pull down?

What the Saint Patty said, both swish you pull down?

My ill show you something that swish?

It's along back pipe and me lucky?

Are you screening those and seen it?

Do?

It's bigger than the pits on the ground.

I don't squeak you.

I'll put you down the table.

And squitch your down pitch.

I'm not around with you.

Have a happy Saint Patty.

Sure completely had it with your boat iron.

What who are you talking to you? Damn it? I keep getting this phone call from the idiot. He's yellow at me in the Leprechaun voice. Every time I try to fall back to sleep, the phone rings again. I don't recognize the number. I don't know who this is.

This happened today, yes, but that the low morning.

I think.

I think Mitchell has someone calling me, just trying to put a buckets working.

I got complete seem that they just completely messed up what they were supposed to call you at eight am and wake you up.

It was supposed to be.

That's exactly what they did. They called me eight am. What the are you thinking of?

Someone called me at at am?

I just thought I was just sleep for forty five minutes.

You out of your mind.

Well, they weren't supposed to like yell at you.

It's supposed to be.

Like cute, no matter what they were supposed to do. You have you have? You have?

Some company called me at eight in the morning when you know, when you know I'm at the borrow night.

I thought it's your favorite holiday.

I thought you would like it.

It was supposed to.

I don't relax.

I haven't slipped in two days.

This is what I want chance to catch.

Up before the weekend.

Hey, Darren, Darren, what hello Darren? My name is Garrett, and my little leprechaun over there, his name's Ronnie.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day.

And you just got phone tapped by your girlfriend, Debuty man.

Are you wearing green?

You guys suck man?

The Elvis Duran phone tap.

This phone tab was pre recorded with permission granted by.

All the Elvis Dan phone tap only on Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

I don't know. I've never been broken up on I guess I don't know.

I have not been dumped either.

I've dumped a lot, right which I know.

People are not gonna believe me when I say this, but I think you might have. Sometimes it's a lot harder to be the one breaking up with somebody than getting broken up with well, gandhi.

That's the question. Is it more Is it more stressful to be the dump er or the dump e? They each have their own stress stress level, right, I don't know.

I think it depends on like if you break up with someone who's going to be you know, is going to be so emotional about it, yeah, you know, and then you feel really bad.

Well, especially if that's one of the reasons you're breaking up because they're overly emotional. But anyway, what what.

I don't know it's him or me that brought flowers to a breakup once.

Okay, so let's talk about the rules of a breakup. I was reading this this morning. This was this is what brought this up at Magnet of Success dot com. I don't know. I love these these websites. Relationship.

There's six the five stages of a breakup for the dumper Number one relief, number two, elation, number three, nostalgia and comparisons, number four, neutrality, and then number five regret and sadness.

Never had any regret or sadness. With my breakups.

I didn't have any regrets, but I had sadness for the other person, Like I felt so sad being mean to like, I felt like I was being mean. But in the long run, I thought, this is actually going to be better for him, It'd be great for me.

I had to go to therapy. When I was breaking up with someone. It was there was a guilt and there was all that. Yeah, but you know, we move on. Hey, not to sound like a cold bitch moving on, but Scary.

Was telling me about we're talking about the good places and worst places to break up with someone.

Scary's question was, well, question.

Not only have I been dumped, but is it okay to go out to take someone to eat to be dumped?

Because that's how it happened to me. And I said, that's the worst idea ever.

That's horrible.

She planned a dinner date on a Thursday night and near her house, went out to dinner, and as the courses went by, so came the excuses of the things or the lead.

Up to the breakup. And by the time we were having dessert, the breakup was done. So the salad came out.

She said, you know, okay, okay, the salad of the appetizer was what conversation during the lead in?

I remember it was a pasta appetizer and we were sitting there and we were talking about how we things haven't been the same lately.

Okay, we haven't. Our time, our schedules don't. Okay.

So you finished your ZD yes, which all bad restaurants have, and I love him. There's good ZD don't get me wrong. And then he moved into the entree. What did you order that night? I was a steak guy. Okay, you ordered your steak. And then what conversation had after the ZD intro?

After that? That then came.

Then came the part where she said, you know, there's there's this guy from my childhood that is back, you know that that moved back to New York City.

And she started this story about how he was now.

All of a sudden back in the picture, and she wanted to know if she was starting to do other things.

She's awful, yeah, she was. I mean, this is awful, okay. First of all, and then you got to dessert. She said, let's just be friends, right.

That's exactly friend zoned me at the end of the and she has no intention on being your friend. Now, okay, here's number one. You don't.

In my opinion, I could be wrong. Don't take someone to a restaurant to break c up with him. A restaurant is for eating in cocktails. That's that's a fun occasion.

How about like a T G I F type.

No, okay.

Also, you should allow that person to be able to go through their emotions, and they can't do that as much in a public place as everyone's staring, and in.

Public is safer for you as the breakup er, the breakup e it's not good.

You have to shoulder, okay.

So and then she brings up the fact, hey there's this guy who I used to see who's back in town.

Why she should have done that? Why is it important that part?

She should have left out painting the picture of why she wants to move in another direction?

And we should She just said that she wanted to tie it up into a nice bow. That's why the dinner closure. Guess what her nice bow failed? What's her full name? Christina? Christina?

What?

I'm sure the last name ends an a vowel. Okay, you know what?

Okay, I did the same thing though.

I took an X out but it was like a TGI F thought it was harmless and we I had the conversation that wasn't going the way we need to.

We need to break up.

So where's a good place to break up with someone? Oh? I usually said? I usually said, well, I said, let's let's take a walk.

Oh that's good.

We walked around the neighbor, but not in.

A secluded place, just in case things get crazy.

Not over text. Don't don't don't break up with me over text.

Look, you know, even though you're you're dying to break up with them, there's still there still needs to needs to be a level of respect for them and their feelings. Like you said, Gandhi, let them go through their emotions.

They should be.

Allowed to go through their emotions. So short of going to a cemetery to break up three in the morning.

Right, So maybe like a park, maybe a house, someone's house.

I think in your living room is a good place.

But then you can't get rid of them when you want to get rid of them, then they just sit there the whole time.

And then you know what happens.

It's like, oh, let's have sex for the last time.

Amidst all the tears. This is very romantic.

Hold on, I got hello, John, you have advice for breakups and for the dumpers or the dumpies.

I have advice for the dumpers.

Okay, go ahead, John, all right.

So I went to Morosa to break up with my girlfriend.

You went to the what Lrosa Pizzas? Okay, a pizza place, okay?

And when I dropped the news that I was gonna be leaving her, she picked up the whole pizza and threw it at me.

Oh, okay, if you're gonna break up in a restaurant, the food needs to be soft or not, and definitely not hot like melting cheese. Got so she I know, but that made it easier, right, She threw the food and she just stormed down.

Yeah knows it now, she wrote.

No, let me ask you this, John, Are you sort of happy? Even though it was a little embarrassing to have pizza thrown in your face? Are you happy? It was like just rip the band aid off fast like that? Or would you wanted a long drawn out let's explain conversation.

I was glad that it was quick. I was I was really glad.

Okay, and it's done, and you didn't hear from her again, nor did she.

Hear from you never again?

No Wow, and wasted pizza at that part? Did they have that Domino's insurance? Thank you, John, thank you very much.

Yeah, I know. I think I need a conversation.

Froggy's wife, Lisa wants to know, Scary, did you wind up paying for the dinner?

We split the bill. I want to make sure I would have made her pay after that. I didn't bring my wallet. Sorry, Storm. There's actually a list of the best places to break up in New York City. Number one in a taxi bad, no, terrible, awful, Chelsea Market, Bowery Hotel, Lobby, so the t KTS Red Steps in Times Square because there's so many tourist they're buying tickets for Broadway Show.

My God.

The peer behind Fairway Market in Red Hook, Brooklyn.

Never on a pier, you get pushed in the donut plant.

No Paley Park, No, no, no, these are bad, bad I would think in a now you know what straight and Nate was saying that.

Over by my old apartment.

Yeah, sixth Avenue and Carmine Street, there's this little park and probably half a dozen times I would walk by and there's a couple.

Try in front of Joe's Pizza, right in front of Joe' pizza, right, you know where that is brody right there?

And every once in a while I walk by and there's a couple where the girls sitting there crying and the guy's just sitting there with.

Like an expressionless face. He just knew that they were breaking up. Always on a park bench. I'm not saying anyone's enjoying breaking up with someone, but I do think, and I go back to what Gandhi said, there needs to be a level of respect where you allow them to be able to have a conversation with you right right. I don't know, Alex, are you there?

Hi?

Hello Alex. So you've had to be a dumper and a dump e So which one was most stressful for you or were they equally as stressful.

No, I've never been a dumpy. I've been a dumper in two extreme situations where I dated a guy in high school ended up being my college boyfriend. Most of our relationship. He was very emotional and at times you know a little about it, so that breakup was pretty tough. And then my next boyfriend was the exact opposite, very stone cold. We broke up. He didn't even care.

So, so I'm breaking up with you? Okay, great, Yeah he did.

He didn't know we broke up. I you know, I said him, I feel like you're not really in love with me. He said I'm not. I said, okay, you know that makes it pretty easy for me. Then we've been together for two years at this point. And then he called me like thirty minutes later and asked me if we were going to go out for dinner the next night.

Yeah. I don't think he got in now, but anyway, but you know what, you're done. You're done.

There is this big sense of relief. Absolutely. Finally we talked to Stephanie. Thank you, Alex Hi Stephanie.

Hi.

So he was your fiance, Yeah, and we were together like seven years.

Seven years. That's a long time. So he broke up with you? And how did that fall out?

He didn't actually say, like we were breaking up. He came home from work one day with a bunch of boxes and just started like packing his stuff up.

It's like a job. He cleared his desk.

Yeah, that's basically what it felt like. And I'm sitting there watching him. I'm like, what are you doing? Like, I'm just packing my stuff together? And I was like, for what reason? He's like, I'm going to move back in with my mom?

What did you give you?

Like why?

I mean, I knew we.

Were having like some problems and everything, but he never expressed that it was to the level that he was gonna then, look, wow, break up with me.

If it didn't get fixed.

Wow.

So he never actually said too much until like a year later he was still trying to get back together.

That's that's not good.

Yeah. By then I was like, well, if you couldn't deal with it in the moment, why would I.

Want to get back to exactly all right, Well, congratulations Stephanie, And that made it easy for I mean after a while. But if there is a big mystery cloud what you're packing this mont out? Huh, I don't know. Uh yeah, So be careful were you're gonna brek up with someone, someone just in a text. Uh, watching people at the airport as they're boarding a plane. Don't do that. You're stuck in the air.

With them, that's horrible.

Don't do it at a restaurant, you're stuck at a table with them, unless there's a fight and someone gets up in leaves and it's just it's.

They get through it.

Can you imagine though, if you're saying goodbye to somebody at the airport and as they're getting on the plane, you're.

Like, bye bye and then close the door. Ye bye.

I hate.

I hate you.

The Mercedes Benz Interview Lounge.

Okay, redo my intro. It was a great intro. Do it again, ladies and gentlemen.

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The moreho el Elvis Dran and the Morning Show.

Hey, is there something in your hometown the outsiders would never understand. I'll give you an example.

Here in New Jersey there used to be a theme park called Action Park.

Danielle, remember growing up and scary? Remember and Scotti b hearing their.

Correct Action Park?

Really you remember cheesy commercials?

We ran them here on Z one hundred. Anyway, as my friend Tom was saying, if you ever went to Action Park, there was a good chance you would actually die on the roller coaster. It was like, there's always like some story.

I have a story. Yeah, Danielle almost died at Action Park, right.

I went on.

I went on the luge, I went on the louge slide and scraped up my entire back and there was blood and everything, and I'm like, oh, I was in so much pain. But I did have a good time at the park.

But it was yeah, Action Park was. It was a water park. It's a good time while the skim is being scraped off your back.

Anyway, they wanted to change the name from Action Park to Class Action Park because there was always someone you know out yep, just like Froggy where you're from, like where like your town or in South Florida where you're originally living.

When you we A.

Lot of people did not understand Santa's enchanted forest, Like.

They didn't get it.

And every Doddy knows what I'm talking about.

People don't. I got it.

If you're from South Florida, you get it, But if you're not familiar, like what the hell is this?

Now, well, tell me what it is.

Now, I want to know what it is.

It's like an amusement It's like a Christmas amusement park. But people don't understand it. And it's the same with the swap shop that used to be in in uh In in Broward County. The swap shop was another one. It was it was like a glorified flea market, but it was fun. And if you're from South Florida, it makes sense. If you're not from there, you could not have it in any other town.

Oh and a terrible Santa's enchanted forest sentence intention forest. I used to have to explain to my friends who would come down that if there is a body of water, I don't care if it's a puddle, a canal, whatever it is, don't get near it because something is lurking. All of my friends used to be like, Oh, that's so cute, let me go down there and splash around. No, alligators and snakes exist down here.

You can't do that.

Oh, many people are at texting and your Action park was terrifying. Almost drowned. Someone said the Alpine slide was deadly. Yeah, that's right.

By the way, I made a mistake I met the alpine slide. I didn't mean roller coaster. So thank you people for chastising me. Because Karen is listening.

Hey, let's talk. Let's go talk to Brody. Hey Brody, so I mean you're from You're from Brooklyn. In Brooklyn is something that outsiders would never understand.

Oh we had something Bensonhurst growing up that maybe you've heard of. We had something called the Mafia.

Oh the Mafia.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They didn't have a jingle like Froggy and Gandhiad. They didn't have a jingle, but everybody knew who they were and everybody appreciated them. They're all really good people.

I love this text message. Where I grew up, we used to have drive your tractor to school day. I want to know where they're from. I would love to talk to them. In Eerie, they have Pepperoni balls. No one understands the hype for Pepperoni balls unless you're from Erie. You're from Erie, right, uh?

Straight in a y they actually named the basketball team the Pepperoni Balls, Like that's that's that's a real thing. Like they were trying to figure out something that is totally eerie. So they said, well, why don't we name our basketball team the Pepperoni Balls?

So yeah, how about that? Okay, you guys know what pepperoni ball is? No, No, I'm not fami. They're fantastic.

It's a ball of dough that is fried and in the middle is like a couple of slices of pepperoni.

It's so good. That sounds goody So so have you ever eaten a garbage plate like they have in Rochester, New York?

What's that?

It's a plate of everything, It's just everything. I don't know. If you're from Rochester, you know what I'm talking about.

Yum?

Well, no, but they call it the garbage plate. What's scary.

When I visited Saint Louis, they had this cheese there called provel and I'm like, what, yeah, Provel? What is this unique cheese? I can't get this anywhere else in the country. It's its own thing and they put it on pizza and it's so unique and it's amazing.

Is it's a whole different flavor. As a matter of fact, there are piza places in New York that have that. Do Saint Louis pies with provels?

What pie?

Well, freedo pie? Yeah, from from the South.

We used to have Freedo pie all the time, where you open up a little bag of Frito's, like the single serving and you'd pour hot chili in there with some fruit, with some fresh onion and some cheese and you fart all day long. You just fart all day long, you know. And Garrett growing up on Staten Island. It's not really the big thing anymore, but it used to be the garbage dump. People used to think of Staten Island as the place with the garbage dump. And there's so much more on Staten Island than that.

Yeah, yeah, gandhi, what is you guys can explain to me Taylor Taylor Ham versus a pork roll.

I don't know what. I don't either. Well, they're the same thing, right, I mean, Taylor Ham and pork roll. It's such a Jersey thing, like a North Jersey thing. You'd order an egg sandwich in the morning with with with pork roll with Taylor Ham, and it's this Taylor Ham that's I don't think there's really any specific part of the pig you can find it. It's just all parks.

So it's Taylor Ham brand pork roll and in North Jersey they call it tailor ham, but in South Jersey it's pork roll.

But it's the same thing it looks like. And then you go over to Pennsylvania. Then you go to Pennsylvania they have scrapple.

Now you know, I never knew what scrapple was until I lived in Q and O two Land, And then when I moved from Q and O two in Philly to Z one hundred in New York, they said, Elvis Duran moving from the scrapple to the big Apple. I'm like, no, I'm not doing that. I'm like, what is Scrapple? Is just chopped up everything from the pig man. It's okay, it's everything. Yeah. Yeah. And in Fort Myers they say they have something called the peanut egg. It's a hard boiled egg that's marinated in boiled peanut water.

Who know.

Okay, anyway, Hey Brody, how's your day going.

Yeah, it's going well. The morning's doing the move very well. I got to talk about the you know, the mafia on the radio, and what can I ask for?

All Right, there you go, and your day is done. What a busy day at the office you had? All right? We love you, Brodie. We'll check back with you in a little bit. Okay, Hey, hey, Gandhi, you used to live in Ohio. What were those candies that every time I've gone to Ohio, they always give me a box of these things there buck.

Eyes, guys. Yeah, buckeye.

So, by nature, a buckeye is actually a poisonous, not that you can't really eat. But if you see a candy buckeye, get it because it's lovely chocolate, just filled with peanut butter, and they're beautiful and they taste it.

Then you go to Wisconsin. You have cheese curds in Wisconsin. And uh, I don't know who's on line twenty four with Bernard. Hey Bernard, how are you doing?

Hey?

How you doing them?

All?

Right? Yeah?

Where are you from? And what from your area? Can can you explain to us that we know nothing about.

Fromber Virginia and this in the seven seven area it's pork smith Norfolk that Yeah, we have deep fried blue crabs. Everybody else seeing them, but we deep fry them in batter.

Oh god, that sounds awesome.

Yeah, you can go twenty miles of the row you can't find it. But it's only in this seven seven.

Area, oh Man deep fried blue crab. Yeah, I want some right now. Yum you from my tom tongue.

It's all about the batter that you have to eat the whole all of the batter. Then you get to the crab.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's not good. Yeah, I meant it.

I meant it. Thanks for sharing that. If I'm ever there, I'm coming over, Bernard. Thanks for listening to us. I appreciate it. Take it easy. Yeah, you know, so you have to explain.

You have to explain to people what these things are in your area, action park or something you eat.

But I don't know. But scrapple. Try some scrapple. I suggest everyone you have to mail order.

If you're not from Pennsylvania, yeah, do it. Being from Texas, we had fried pies. If you guys ever had fry pie.

Oh no, that sounds good.

Oh god, it's so good. There's a little cafe down the street from where I lived, and they did these fresh apricot fried pies.

They'd fry up the apricot in the pies. And remember the McDonald's fried pies. You know, I don't kind of like that. And my mother would bring me an apricot pie home from lunch in a paper bag, and by the time it got back to the house, it would fall out the bottom of the bag because there's so much grease. Just cintegrate the bag. I love that memory anyway.

Moon pie.

I love moon pies.

Yeah.

My friends in Nashville always send me some moon pies every now and then.

They're so good.

Oh my gosh, Frog the moon pies, he said, the moon pies.

Oh.

Absolutely. From the South, we always had moon pies. You go to the store and you get a Lance moon pie and a coke.

Yeah.

See, we get a Lance moonpie and an RC Cola. I don't know if you ever heard of rc cola. That's the thing in the past.

I think. I don't know.

Anyway, moving on, there's also the sweet Corn Serenade Festival in beautiful Oscaloosa, Iowa. Boiled Peanuts in South Carolina.

Yep.

You know, you have your own thing in your town, so you know, don't take it. Don't take it for granted, even if it is a water park that could possibly kill you.

Check it out.

You're so appreciated and I love.

You guys much.

Elvis Duran in the Morning Show, Elvis Duran in the morning show.

Okay, I was accused of being such a boomer yesterday. Oh, I took a good friend a lunch yesterday and I ordered the soup and he's like, he's like, he's like twenty four years old, right, He's like, oh, soup. I said, Well, I said, it's running good soup today. You should have this soup. You're such a boomer.

Really, really, the more I thought about it, because you texted me after this, and the more I thought about it, it is kind of a boomer food.

Which kind of soup was it?

What do you mean? Which was?

Because I feel like a French onion soup wouldn't be in that same category because everybody likes French onions.

Okay, well, no, I think that's not I think you're wrong. I think all soups are boomers according to this guy.

I also think who was trending on TikTok all of a sudden, it would be a gen Z broccoli cheddar.

No, no, no, don't listen to the.

I rarely see excuse me, I rarely see soups trending on TikTok.

The more I thought about it, soup definitely a boomer food, and then depending on the sandwich.

Like if you ordered a ruben.

Boomer that that's that's bull crap. I tell you why, Well, then do you know what turn her ond? Then you're full of bull crap.

Diamond. A Ruben is boomer?

Absolutely?

Can I ask what a ruben is exactly? I know it's some type of a meat.

Come on, Boomer, no idea strommy sour crowd on rye with Swiss cheese.

Swiss cheese sound good?

Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something.

New York deli restaurants are very, very in right now. A lot of people who are young and not boomers are going to them, and they are all about rubens.

So don't get started with me. Maybe a boomer in another city maybe okay, But I'm telling you in New York that they're very hot. These are hot places, says the boomer. I wouldn't think.

I think you're right, though. I think it would depend on where you are, because it would be different. What would make you a boomer? What you order different?

Quicker oats is a boomer boomer food?

What is puff?

I don't know?

There is exactly?

So scary on West Broadway? What's your favorite place to do, like a nice Jewish deli, high end brunch Sdel's. Okay, Sodell's, go there on brunch day. What is the average age of the person eating those ruben sandwiches?

Twenty three?

Okay, sir, I rest my case. Boomer has rested, needs to rest.

It's getting Can I just say that soup Nazi store? What's that guy from the.

Set that's gone?

No, he's still there and I but I pass it and the line is still wrapped around the building.

Okay, look at the average Look at the average age of the people. That's what we're talking about, the average age of the people eating his soup. Yeah, he's done, but his thing is there.

Okay.

Now if you order soup and a packet of saltines, now that's a different story.

I'll give you that. If you're throwing crackers in that soup, that is definitely Boomer boom.

What about if they're little fishy crackers, Yeah, those are good.

Saltines. Is definitely is a Boomer phone. Okay, Now, okay, let's just stop chilling.

Yes, Sam, this conversation is making me miss my grandpa. You know what, taking me hungry, irving.

Comparing me to Grandpa Irving. Actually, I'm honored, so thank you.

Don't answer the phone. Elvis Duran. The Elvis Duran phone tap.

All right, Scary has informed me that today's phone tap needs a little concentration and setup.

Well, Lydia wanted to phone tap her mom, Mildred, after Mildred has been trying to return his shirt to an online company. Now they failed to include that that little return shipping label in order, you know, in her order. So there's been a series of breakdown and communications. It's been awful. She's been expecting a callback. So Ronnie in the back and I pretend to be the company. And by the way, the older daughter, Denise is sitting in the background and she also.

Gets phone tap. So it's a tag team phone tap on mom and daughter. All right, So a lot going on. Hope you kept up with that. If you didn't, maybe you'll figure it out. But listen closely. Here we go. The tag team phone tap was scary and baldfre Hello, Hi, I'm looking for Mildred Battles.

This is.

My name is Patrick Fitzgerald from zoopasm dot com and I'm following up regarding a.

I call you guys two months and nobody never called me back, and it's tell me to return my bronchet and I want to change it, and nobody give.

Me good customer service.

We have to send you the shipping label and a box. Yes, I wanted shipping label.

I wanted tool line.

So we need to get your name and address on one second, so.

As it dot com Gerald Fitzpatrick speaking. How may I help you, ma'am?

How may I ask you?

I just talk to you.

I tell you on my problem. You tell me I'm mad? Ask you?

What do you meet, ma'am?

I'm sorry, you were just transferred to my department.

What do you meep in?

Ma'am?

It says here that you would like to purchase an item?

Is that correct? Courts Court?

She would you think that.

This is Patrick Fitzgerald? Did you get the problem taken care of?

What's he going on over there?

What did I said that?

I didn't say anything about purchasing, ma'am. I just tried to get you to the proper department so we can have a label and a box process for you.

Here you practally clear speaking?

You tell me I have to put my brown set in it?

And you do you have an item number for the item you're looking to purchase.

Ma'am, please hold.

Hello.

This is Patrick Fitzgerald. Please hold, don't call me. Hold Gerald Fitzpatrick speaking. I have your order ready, ma'am. This this is Gerald Fitzpatrick. Can I have your trinit card information?

Of course, do not understand what I just said to you. You're great, straight up. I just got on the phone. Here, uh here, you just got on the phone. So we're all set.

You need to drip a few w T forty drops and you're hearing it and turn it up because you're not hearing what I'm saying to get were not want to buy anything?

We said you. I never said you wanted to buy something. I'm here to assist you with the return of your shirt purchase departm man. Who is the return department? Would you like to purchase a sweater right now?

Oh?

My god, Joe after whom your name is. If you can't understand what the.

Phone you need another job, feel freedom visits the phone.

Put me on this born. There's two people on the.

Phone talking at the same time.

They're doing this as well.

Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello.

I hear you from I can't hear you ma'am, can you here.

Too loud for me? I know.

Let's solve your problem.

Here, solve your problem, you stupid nothing.

You don't listen, you don't about.

We're happy to ship that item right out to you. We just need your credit card.

Sorry, that item is back ordered. Right now, that phone?

Where's your man at that?

My manager is.

Elvis Durant and my manager is Elvis Durant.

Put them on that one now, Mildred. My name is Scary Jones, and I'm here with Ronnie the Bald Freak, and together we are tying fitz trick. And you've been phone tapped. I've been your younger daughter. Lydia's playing a joke on both of you. Oh my goodness, you Celia, you play game.

Because Lydia, I'll tell you play a game on the phone.

I'm gonna give her. Oh my god.

Elvis Duran's phone tap.

This phone tab was pre recorded permission granted by all participates.

The Elvis Terran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

Hey, so I was talking to Gandhi. The question was what's the worst date you ever went on? Yes? And actually It started with her story about a bad date that I said, well, we should bring this to the air, so talk about that date.

So I really enjoy being outside and in nature. So we decided, Hey, we're gonna meet up at this park of flowers and we're gonna go walk around and look at the flowers. So get there hanging out, and then he looks at me and says, listen, I'm gonna be really honest. You got about forty five minutes till the acid I took hits me. So if you have any questions or like, want to have serious conversation, it has to happen now.

I was like, oh my god, goodness, oh my god, where did that date go?

It went with the acid hitting him about forty five minutes later and me being like, dude, enjoy the flowers.

I can't handle this now and left him. I left him in the park at the flowers.

I think he's okay, did you ever see you? Never saw him here?

Now?

I was like, you had to do acid before our first date? Come on, that's cool, weird.

Yeah, listen, that's true. See my mine just pales in comparison. What is did someone I really wanted to go out with for a long time and finally we're having dinner together. He's wearing this white shirt and of course red wine all over his shirt. Ice piled, ice pilled an entire glass of wine on him.

Was he really uncol about it?

Yes, he was uncool about it, but it was like, so, date over, So I guess the topic should be first and last day, same day.

I was the guy who we went out and we were driving and all of a sudden, he stops the car and I'm like, what are you doing, takes a seatbelt off, comes on top of me on the other side of the car, like in the passenger seat, and I'm like, what.

The hell are you doing?

I thought this is what you wanted. I'm like no.

So he got off of me and I said, could you please take me home that this is over? So, thank thankfully he torove me home.

And that was it?

Was it weird?

What about you?

Frog?

So there was a girl that she works on the TV station in South Florida. I don't want to say which TV station or who it is, but she was on a date with a guy first time, and they're having appetizers and everything's going well, and all of a sudden, he gets up and goes to the bathroom. He comes back about twenty five minutes later. She's thinking he left. He's like, I'm so sorry. He said, I just have to tell you, I am so turned on by you that I had to go to the bathroom and take care of myself.

And now we confess it's disgusting.

Twenty five.

It's disgusting. God, even if she got a bit left, never saw him a game, even if.

It's two minutes, it's disgusting. I hope he washed his hands. I know, Please, can we talk about the funeral thing?

Yeah?

We then, so you don't even remember the guy's a right, No I do. And he went he went home with him that night hit his parents own a funeral pollo. I know you don't tell that, Okay, go ahead, well.

In Brooklyn, and so he said, oh, let's go back to my house. So we go and it's dark and he's not turning on any lights and stuff like that, and we're walking through the house and stuff, and then you know, we started making out and stuff, and I said, it smells like flowers in here. And then I start to realize where we are, and I was like, whoa I.

Mean, was there there was a casket. Yeah, it was closed. I don't know if anybody was in it.

Like the room, like the room with the chairs and flowers, and and then I was like, I got to get out of here.

I'm so uncomfortable with it.

I was like, I go to the monster. I don't know so textas I want to hear, I want to hear yours. What's scary?

My friend she went on a first date and when the night was over, he pulls her, He pulls the car.

Aside, and then they start kissing. All of a sudden, she hears some kind of on zip oh.

She looks down and his stuff was just out, and there was an awkward moment and they started looking at each other and looking down at it, and he goes, well, I guess just because I'm a police officer doesn't mean I have this right to show you my pistol.

And then he put it back away because he that's sad.

I think, if you're ever wondering, is now the time to whip it out? The answer is always no.

It's not not leave it.

But I thought you wanted to see it.

No, no, no, there should be no doubt.

Let's go ahead and go ahead and answer that. No one wants to see that. If you're wondering, I know, you know, what are we being really? I mean, we're being like real school here. Don't don't whip that out.

Well, it's funny because that's scary.

Said that, because it's happened to me, and I know it's happened to multiple members of my friends group where a guy has just done that and you're like, but why I don't understand this.

Like they think you're going to jump on top of that.

Hen Hello Mariella, Hi, Hi guys.

Bye. So you were at a beautiful South Street seaport uh in the Seaport District just we called it, in New York City And what happened? First date?

Right to go?

Yes for a first date. I was excited to go in to the state with this guy. And we're overlooking the ocean and the ocean the water, and he all of a sudden collapses in my arms and I'm holding him and he falls to the ground and apparently he saintsed on me, and a bunch of people are coming up saying, hey, do you need water? Do you need help? And I had to smack him really hard to wake up, and it was a horrible experience.

It's a horful I mean, I mean he's okay now right, I mean health wise.

I guess so many years ago. I really hope he is. We didn't go on a date after that, so he told me he didn't eat enough before the date.

Yeah, who my favorite party? You had to smack him?

Rely?

Yeah it was, Yeah, it happened.

It's over.

Well, okay.

For fainting.

Yeah, how dare you ruin my date?

Yeah?

Exactly.

Well, I love you guys.

Thanks for listening to any interesting text going on first date, very extreme golf. Took me to a graveyard and later a rave. It was some kind of BDSM club. I don't think you should take someone to a BDSM club for your first date or a graveyard bowling. You know, I don't want to go bowl on.

The graveyart yard.

I might like on the first things on the first date. You don't know.

Yeah, you don't know.

That you like that.

You should have a discussion.

Yeah, there's a lot of text coming through.

We were driving to the beach once with this guy had never gone out before. It was my friend's brother, and there was a lot of traffic getting into the beach to pay, like you know, the toll depart he sticks his head out of the car and he starts screaming out.

Of the way by the screaming.

At the top of his lungs. And I kept thinking, if this little bit of traffic made him that angry, I think I'm not going.

On the roll. These are the signs you see that are warning a tuck and roll situation. This text message went home with a guy who had action figures all over his bedroom. All I could think of was, he's the forty year old virgin. That's exactly Mike, just cracking me up.

There's a lot of people texting it about dates whipping it out.

Yeah, you can't believe it. Why would you do that.

I don't know a secret society or this is exception, No secret society of whipperrouters.

I don't know.

I think some people with a good roll of thumb, and you go on a first day, do not take it out under any circumstances, not even.

On the second or third or four, not until you know you've it's time.

And I think bus both sexes, ladies, yes, don't whip it out.

In the way that you do.

I'm good.

How are you?

It's to the point where I'm glad I'm not dating anymore because I don't want any more dates like this, you know what I'm saying. So what happened on your first date?

So?

I went out with this guy who I had known in college and he seems really normal. We had classes together and he took me to a sports bar in the city, so the giants were on go giants. He just kept ordering shots of tequilo, though for himself, I was drinking like a beer or whatever.

Oh boy, he.

Ended up getting so drunk.

That, like at sports bars, you.

Know, when there's commercials, they'll play the music really loud. He got on the bench that we were sitting on and gave me a full blown lap dance, and I had to guess the hell out of all.

Wow, Yeah, you know what, You just know when it's time to just to call it a night, and you know, you want to be polite, you don't want to run out, but at the same time, what do you have to lose? Just leave?

Yeah?

You know, yeah, I call.

I called my girlfriend who was on a date somewhere down the street, and I was like, we gotta.

Go get me out of here, all right, Jen, thank you very much. Text. First date, we got back to his place. We're just hanging out, having a couple of beers. His probation officer shows up, Yes, finds the beer. The guy said, no, it's he said it was my beer. So we didn't get it in trouble. But he got arrested. Never talked to him again. He was getting arrested on a first Day's probably not a good y.

Not a good thing.

Nor when he tries to say that the contraband is yours.

Good morning, Chelsea. Hi, on a first date, he asked you to split the bill? Was that unusual?

So I ordered seven dollars chicken tacos and he ordered about I would say, fifty dollars worth of seafood and fish and alcohol. So then basically the bill comes, and of course the woman I am, I offered to pay my part, and I actually had cast on me, and I offered him a twenty dollars bill for my seven dollars chicken tacos. Mind you, I didn't drink any alcohol. I had water. So I give him my twenty and you know, I'm expecting to get maybe like a ten back, he kept my twenty didn't get any change back, so.

She had to pick a part of his stab hate.

I just hate cheap people like that.

You had a guy take me to the movies once and I offered to pay, and I and I didn't have exact so later on, when I got changed, she said, Hey, you know the rest of the money that you owe me, go buy me some milk duds.

Don't do that, That's what I'm said.

But you know, at least you found it early on. No need to bother with this guy ever again, right, Chelsea?

Seriously?

Absolutely all right.

Finally we talked to David.

Hi, David, Hey, how you guys doing.

Don't okay? So you went on a date with someone and she asked you? What'd she ask you?

She asked me back to her place, and I was all for and of course, because it off pretty well and we seemed like we were on the same page and everything I should have known it was too good to be true. And this is like kind of more in Danielle's alley I think than anybody else. But either way, we go back to her apartment and everything's going great. She said, Hey, can I slip into something a little more comfortable. I was like, oh, yeah, great. So she goes, she comes back and she's dressed in this Betty Rubble costume. But but it's not like sexy Betty Rubble. It's like Didney balloon head Betty Rubble, like it was bouncing back and forth in the doorway, kind of babyhead.

Wait, so Betty, she dressed like Betty Rubble from the flint Stones.

Yeah yeah, and then she even tried to do the voice and everything and all that, and Betty, did you ye do it?

You know what I'm saying?

What did you say?

Because I can't even imagine what you say at that point.

Well, I'm from Long Island, so it's kind of like what up?

Yeah, you've thought you've seen it all? All right?

Okay, So for guys, don't whip it out on the first eight. For women, don't come back dresses Betty Rubble.

Yeah.

No, the hot sexy Betty Rubble.

No, no, no, no, Betty Weird no no, no, Bety Rubble. Betty Rubble is not going to do it for maybe Bam Bam.

Yeah, I don't know, really, you dressed up as Bam Bam.

Insight, here would you like for me? Too sure.

The Brooklyn Boys podcast.

I want to read his nets one because he gave us two straws out of five. How's your corn beef? If we're all go take another bite? Okay? Well what is his review of our podcast? Abe seventy seven?

Yeah, Ab says stop eating during the podcast dummies.

Listen to the Brooklyn Boys podcast on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. El mister ran in the morning show.

All right, shows done, Let's get out of here until next time. Say peace out, everybody, Peace out, everybody.

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