What happens when your child knows they did the wrong thing but immediately reaches for an excuse?

The Lachie Neale tribunal story gives parents a surprisingly useful way into a bigger conversation about responsibility, consequences and healthy masculinity. Justin and Kylie unpack what happens when kids blame others, deny what happened or expect an exception because the circumstances feel unfair.

They also explore the difference between standing up for someone and getting even, why anger can lead to poor choices, and how parents can support their kids through consequences without rescuing them from the discomfort.

KEY POINTS
Helping kids move from blame, excuse and denial to ownership, accountability and responsibility
Why rules need to apply even when someone is talented, popular or important
The difference between loyalty and retaliation
Why parents often want to rescue kids from consequences
How to support your child without taking responsibility for their choices
What healthy masculinity looks like when things go wrong
Why the way someone responds after a mistake tells us a lot about them

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“I'm not here to rescue you. I care, but I can't carry you.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED
The OAR framework: Ownership, Accountability and Responsibility

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Ask your kids:
What would you do if you saw a friend getting shoved?
Should the best player get different rules?
What's the difference between sticking up for someone and getting even?

When your child makes a mistake, resist the urge to fix the consequence. Help them own what happened, understand the impact and work out what they can do differently next time.

What happens when your child knows they did the wrong thing but immediately reaches for an excuse?
The Lachie Neale tribunal story gives parents a surprisingly useful way into a bigger conversation about responsibility, consequences and healthy masculinity. Justin and Kylie unpack what happens when kids blame others, deny what happened or expect an exception because the circumstances feel unfair.
They also explore the difference between standing up for someone and getting even, why anger can lead to poor choices, and how parents can support their kids through consequences without rescuing them from the discomfort.
KEY POINTS
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>Helping kids move from blame, excuse and denial to ownership, accountability and responsibility</li>
<li>Why rules need to apply even when someone is talented, popular or important</li>
<li>The difference between loyalty and retaliation</li>
<li>Why parents often want to rescue kids from consequences</li>
<li>How to support your child without taking responsibility for their choices</li>
<li>What healthy masculinity looks like when things go wrong</li>
<li>Why the way someone responds after a mistake tells us a lot about them</li>
</ul>
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE &ldquo;I'm not here to rescue you. I care, but I can't carry you.&rdquo;
RESOURCES MENTIONED
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>The OAR framework: Ownership, Accountability and Responsibility</li>
</ul>
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Ask your kids:
<ol data-spread="false">
<li>What would you do if you saw a friend getting shoved?</li>
<li>Should the best player get different rules?</li>
<li>What's the difference between sticking up for someone and getting even?</li>
</ol>
When your child makes a mistake, resist the urge to fix the consequence. Help them own what happened, understand the impact and work out what they can do differently next time.

Deciding which parenting advice to follow? Join the thousands of mums and dads who turn to Australia’s most downloaded parenting podcast.

Dr Justin Coulson and his wife Kylie bring real parenting solutions every day, cutting through the noise of modern advice with clear, practical guidance for every step of parenting.

From early childhood challenges to the complexities of the teenage years, each daily episode offers simple, evidence-based strategies to help you feel more confident in your decisions and more connected to your kids.

Deciding which parenting advice to follow?&nbsp;Join the thousands of mums and dads who turn to Australia&rsquo;s most downloaded parenting podcast.
Dr Justin Coulson and his wife Kylie bring real parenting solutions every day, cutting through the noise of modern advice with clear, practical guidance for every step of parenting.
From early childhood challenges to the complexities of the teenage years, each daily episode offers simple, evidence-based strategies to help you feel more confident in your decisions and more connected to your kids.

The Happy families podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now.

Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Lessons From Lion's Star Lachie Neale

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/8d36afb3-df51-4d37-81a5-b4c600221461/transcript