What do you say to a child who’s lost multiple loved ones and now lies awake, terrified of death? In this deeply compassionate episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack why repeated loss can create overwhelming bedtime anxiety, why it peaks when the lights go out, and the simple, research-backed ways parents can help. You’ll learn how to create safety, connection, and rituals that bring comfort — without minimising their grief or making false promises.

KEY POINTS
Multiple losses and cumulative grief 
Why bedtime can trigger fears
Connection and presence over quick fixes or false assurances
Following your child’s lead
How to create closure for your child

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
 “What your child needs most isn’t for their fear to disappear — it’s to feel truly seen and understood in it.” – Dr Justin Coulson

RESOURCES
Understanding Grief in Children - Sage Journals
Studies on the default mode network and bedtime anxiety
Helping Kids Cope with Grief - a Conversation with Kristy Thomas
Cumulative Grief - Dr Bill Webster
The Journey of the Default Mode Network: Development, Function, and Impact on Mental Health

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Make bedtime a safe, calming ritual.
Be present in the moment.
Follow their emotional lead.
Use comfort objects.
Create closure rituals.

What do you say to a child who&rsquo;s lost multiple loved ones and now lies awake, terrified of death? In this deeply compassionate episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack why repeated loss can create overwhelming bedtime anxiety, why it peaks when the lights go out, and the simple, research-backed ways parents can help. You&rsquo;ll learn how to create safety, connection, and rituals that bring comfort &mdash; without minimising their grief or making false promises.
KEY POINTS
<ul>
<li aria-level="1">Multiple losses and cumulative grief&nbsp;</li>
<li aria-level="1">Why bedtime can trigger fears</li>
<li aria-level="1">Connection and presence over quick fixes or false assurances</li>
<li aria-level="1">Following your child&rsquo;s lead</li>
<li aria-level="1">How to create closure for your child</li>
</ul>
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE &ldquo;What your child needs most isn&rsquo;t for their fear to disappear &mdash; it&rsquo;s to feel truly seen and understood in it.&rdquo; &ndash; Dr Justin Coulson
RESOURCES
<ul>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/09731342251328150#:~:text=A%20longitudinal%20study%20of%20bereaved,death%2C%20after%20which%20they%20resolved">Understanding Grief in Children</a> - Sage Journals</li>
<li aria-level="1">Studies on the default mode network and bedtime anxiety</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://happyfamilies.com.au/podcast/episode/701-kristy-thomas-helping-kids-cope-with-grief">Helping Kids Cope with Grief </a>- a Conversation with Kristy Thomas</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://griefjourney.com/article-library/cumulative-grief/">Cumulative Grief </a>- Dr Bill Webster</li>
<li aria-level="1"><a href="https://www.mdpi.com/2079-7737/14/4/395">The Journey of the Default Mode Network: Development, Function, and Impact on Mental Health</a></li>
</ul>
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
<ol>
<li aria-level="1">Make bedtime a safe, calming ritual.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Be present in the moment.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Follow their emotional lead.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Use comfort objects.</li>
<li aria-level="1">Create closure rituals.</li>
</ol>

The Happy Families Podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now. Every day Justin and his wife Kylie provide practical tips and a common sense approach to parenting that Mums and Dads all over the world are connecting with. Justin and Kylie have 6 daughters and they regularly share their experiences of managing a busy household filled with lots of challenges and plenty of happiness. For real and practicable advice from people who understand and appreciate the challenges of a time poor parent, listen to Justin and Kylie and help make your family happier.

The Happy Families Podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now. Every day Justin and his wife Kylie provide practical tips and a common sense approach to parenting that Mums and Dads all over the world are connecting with. Justin and Kylie have 6 daughters and they regularly share their experiences of managing a busy household filled with lots of challenges and plenty of happiness. For real and practicable advice from people who understand and appreciate the challenges of a time poor parent, listen to Justin and Kylie and help make your family happier.

The Happy families podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now.

Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Supporting a Grieving, Anxious Child

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/fa326977-3de5-4283-9b8b-af3500c58607/clips/7d674705-15ad-4231-84e2-b3380085b94f/transcript