There are more than 1,000 people missing in Lahaina, Hawaii, and they are all almost certainly dead after the worst wildfire in American history. Locals on the ground say cops blocked exit roads, and water officials withheld water from firefighters. Meanwhile, Joe Biden showed up to compare his kitchen fire to the island's tragedy. 

And for the first time in history an American president has been charged with a federal crime. Lowly Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis dragged Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani into her podunk county jail to mugshot them. Their crimes? Objecting to the 2020 election. You won't believe what  she's calling a mafia-style crime.

Then we're going to talk about about goblins. Wayward young humans who have adopted the look and lifestyle of ugly and frightening creatures from mythology, and we're all expected to pretend it's normal.