M from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl ill two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the backs of diamond eyed school children who grew into hymnals recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots. To keep the warmth of their blood, be wise, be smart, being black, opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of jim see. King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife, wife told her daughter, and daughter told the as this is. And the ancestors told me that you would come to give wisdom of thousands. They said you would come dropping Dropping the Gem. Welcome back to another episode of the Dropping Gems podcast. I'm Debbie Brown. This week I am going to do a special Q and a episode of this show. I get a lot of questions on my social media, sometimes to my inbox, and so I realized that something I haven't done really since season one is just do a nice little Q and A with the community with a collective and answer some questions. So I decided to do that this episode, and a couple of days ago, I posed a question on my Instagram story for those that follow if you don't, I'm at Debbie Brown on I G and all the Places, and I said, what are some questions that you have about mindfulness, the spiritual journey life that you would like for me to explore on the Dropping Gyms podcast. So all the questions today, and I got actually a couple of hundred questions, so I don't know if I can get through all of those, but I wanted to find questions that have themes that a lot of people were connecting to. So I'm going to be reading directly off my i G answering questions that come in. I'm going to hold space for it to be anonymous, so I'm not going to share anyone's names, and I'm going to be connecting to the questions that I consider, um, maybe I haven't explored often enough on this podcast that can't already be found in my work, and also answer questions that it just seems like a lot of people are asking. So let's go ahead and get started. I hope everybody is having a blessed week. Thank you for joining me. It's been a really cool season this year. I've been having a lot of conversations I love, so I just want to throw too. If you haven't yet, highly recommend a couple of episodes that you might connect to. One was an episode that I really really loved recently was with Rasmamerican. We talked about somatics, we talked about trauma. Another episode that I loved was with Barba Schmidt, who is just such an inspiring, amazing woman um and she she shared a lot of thoughts on spirituality, the spiritual journey, self forgiveness, expanding outside of things you might have experienced in your younger life. And another episode that was recent that I really loved was with Dr Sheila Marie Campbell, who is a doctor of Chinese medicine and incredible elemental acupuncturist, and she spoke a lot about the way that energy moves in life and your body, in your health, and sacred partnership and sacred child rearing. So you might take those episodes, check those out. I've got my questions up now, so I'm gonna just dive into the questions, gives some answer us and we'll spend a little bit of time together. And as always, I highly recommend if you feel called, grab a journal, grab a blanket, light a candle, get cozy if that's the possibility for you, UM or type some notes in your phone, anything that feels resonant, make sure you write it down. Type it down, because your spirit wants to know it all right. The first question UM that I want to connect to is I normally enjoy my yoga and meditation, but lately I've been feeling too drained to do it. I love this question because I think this is a question that everyone can really relate to, myself included. And I have actually a podcast episode about this you might dig called Healing Fatigue. So the thing about you know, personal growth, the thing about healing self um or expanding in general, is it does take a lot out of you physically and emotionally. So never underestimate the physical effects that can happen when we're doing deep process or we are trying on new ways of being in new practices. There is absolutely a fatigue to it that isn't talked about enough. You know, if you are kind of moving through some very specific parts of your spiritual curriculum right now, or if you're really expanding the way that you know yourself, it's exhausting, and it's exhausting because your mind is constantly going, your heart is constantly you know, releasing grief, creating space, and that requires a lot of us mentally, emotionally and spiritually a lot. You know, doing the work is not easy, and I try to always frame it through its benefits but also through its real process, which is time intensive, energy intensive. So kudos to you one for taking a moment to know is yourself and your body and how you are currently relating to your practice, because that is very important. Your practice can always grow, it can always change, and you can always press pause. So from a personal standpoint, you know, depending on where I may be, and I'm in a I'm in a really um, beautiful fertile soil in my life right now. But I also spent years in deep process doing the deeper kind of psychoanalytical, emotional and physical work of healing myself of traumatic experiences, and I absolutely needed at some points to take breaks. So I have absolutely in my path taken a month off, taken two months off, taken three months off. Try not to exceed that because I know it. It's not a service to me. You know, I know how much I need my spiritual practice and also how much I really love it, how much it adds to my life. So I try not to stretch it past taking a three month break. When I do take breaks, I'm very intentional about the breaks. I don't take a break from my practice and then say, since I'm not doing my practice, I'm gonna binge television, I'm gonna binge food. I'm gonna, you know, just give over to a reversal of all the work that I've done. I just decide not to do those particular things and to take the time I would have spent on that to rest. So if you take a break, do it with intention, do it with thoughtfulness. And taking a break does not mean reversing to factory settings, and it doesn't mean that you're going to do the opposite, which means engage in unconscious behavior, you know, do things that are not really serving to who you are and who you have bloomed to be. Take a break very simply follow your gut, follow your intuition, and if you are specifically tired. This question specifically spoke to meditation in yoga. If you would have spent maybe an hour ninety minutes, two hours on that practice, then just take a break from that couple of hours. Don't take a break from your life, take a break from the couple of hours of your practice, and instead of doing those things, consider doing something else like sleep, like taking a warm bath, um, something that nourishes you and really honors the tiredness that you're feeling. That was a really good question. I think a lot of us can relate to that. Oh, I love this, I love this question. UM. This next question that I want to bring forward says how to deal with a parent with anxiety while also working through your own. So a big moment in time that we're in is that many of us, especially if you are somewhere on the spectrum of the millennial generation, which pretty vast. You could be in your forties or you could be in your very late twenties, is part of our awakening and our consciousness is found in reparenting. A lot of us have to do the work of reparenting. Um. A lot of us have to do the work of excavating a mother wound or a father wound, or a both wound. And so these are conversations that in this age bracket, especially between late twenties UM, going into probably mid forties, we might find ourselves talking about a lot more. We're doing a lot of them learning around unconscious behavior and parenting, a lot of them learning around wounding and the way trauma is carried through generations. So this is not an easy answer that I'm going to give you, but I want you to know this is something that is actively being worked on, worked on right now by most likely millions of people. So I highly suggest equipping yourself with the tools to meet that. The way that I interpreted this question, because it's said how to deal with a parent with anxiety while also working through your own UM, I'm assuming that the person that wrote this question is speaking about their parents, So I would really recommend um doing some deeper research on that apparent with anxiety. UM, there's probably something you might have been experiencing since your childhood. What that really shows is, UH, they have potentially an inability to regulate their emotions. If you have an inability to regulate your emotions, most likely, UM, you had childhood wounding of some kind or experience the later life trauma. But at some point, UM, you disconnected from the ability to be settled in choice as you're having experiences and or you miss the opportunity to build your authentic core identity. And so if this is what you're facing with a parent or a previous caregiver in your life, UM, look up the terms emotionally immature parenting. There are some books around this. UM. I highly recommend for those that this is their lived experience dealing with emotionally immature parents UM gas lighting of any kind, withholding of any kind, but an unhealthy dynamic with a parent, take some time look into books that have to do with experiencing parents who are emotionally immature, parents that have mental health concerns, parents that have borderline personality disorder UM that could be of a lot of help, and there are some workbooks for that. So this is a process. This is not a one tip or try that I can share to say, oh, just do this or take a deep breath, because this has most likely been a life long hardship for you, a lifelong challenge, and depending on how old you are and how old your parent is you might have a few more decades of this, and typically at certain ages people can only change so far, so they might be able to lessen um some of the pains, some of the impact of their behavior. But the more time that passes, the harder it is for your neural pathways to be rewired so that you can actually see changed behavior. So sending a lot of compassion to you, a lot of love to you, and also equip yourself with knowledge. Knowledge is the secret here because it makes it less personal of how it feels to you when your parent may be behaving in a way that feels triggering. Mm hmm. All right, so let's see. I'm looking through some questions as we're talking. Um mm hmm. Okay, I think this is a good question. A question that I received is how can my boyfriend start being more motivated? He has great goals but never goes or it. Whether this is for those listening, if you relate to the role of boyfriend, or if this is a friend in your life or a family member in your life, you know the best thing to do in scenarios like this is to really encourage them to seek outside help. It's important that if you are in a love partnership. We're definitely meant to elevate one another, help each other grow, learn from each other, teach each other. But you want to be careful about taking on the role of caretaker and taking on the role of parents for this person or mama for this person. Um. It is not a path that will serve you long term, and it's not a path that will serve them either. So I would definitely recommend that instead of considering yourself their personal cheerleader or you know, their encourager, their motivator, their parents, getting them to do things that their lives are not used to, getting them to treat themselves in a way that they haven't go for things that, um, they haven't been able to so far. Consider you know, getting them, um reading some books that could grow their self esteem, connecting them with a coach if that is monetarily feasible, UM, some content, some videos and movies, especially since you said boyfriend, you know, a book, a book that can resonate um. Actually a movie that could resonate with them because it really speaks for more of a masculine lens is Finding Joe, which is about the work of Joseph Campbell it's really really really powerful documentary. Have been recommending it for maybe nine years. They used to buy it for everyone. Um. But yeah, shifted from this being your responsibility because there is only stress and hardship to be found for that, and not um deeper intimacy and consider um encouraging them to investigate their childhood and their early woundings. Typically, if people have a creativity inside of them, have a vision inside of them that they're not able to express, it comes across to us as lack of motivation like oh gosh, just stop me in so lazy or just get out there and do it um, which is understandable, but in actuality like this person has. Potentially one of the possibilities could be that they had really great ideas as a child and weren't around adults that supported that, or they're around people that constantly criticize them, or they were never celebrated when they did actually go for something, and so there is a wounding that they don't even necessarily remember birth that exists inside of them that keeps them from becoming more, that keeps them from having the esteem, the internal fire, the fearlessness that could allow them to really go for their dreams for their goals or to really use the gifts that you may see so clearly that they are not sharing with the world. So the biggest point of advice here is do not take on the responsibility of this UM. It will not end well for either party. But continue encouraging with detachment from outcome. Not in a coach way, not in a parental way, but in an authentic way where you really see them and what they're trying to do. Don't project, don't overly criticize UM. This issue is deeper than you and your relationship, so finding things about inner child healing, finding things about being able to own who you are UM could be really helpful for them. So start suggesting maybe some podcasts UM if you know of them, or you know, really express your desire to help them become more of who you know them to be, but without taking on the role of being the teacher, and encourage them to seek outside help, to seek out someone to talk to, to grow their community, to grow their friend group so that they can start having some new perspectives. They can start connecting to people who really see them and see their strengths. Then just go slowly, move slowly, rocking so a question I got. Um, there's so many good questions. The question that I got that I'm gonna read is something that has been coming forward a lot more as more and more people are choosing unique paths of service or unique ways of showing up in their purpose. So this question says, what steps did you take in showing up online as a healer in the beginning of your pivot. I have a couple of different ways that I want to answer this question, because you know, something about myself is I do not see myself in a role. I don't see myself in terms of a title. I don't see myself in terms of um projections or perceptions from other people. So I'm somebody and this is you know, I'm all of my chart. I'm a Gemini son Jim and I moon Leo. Rising my autonomy and not existing in a box is really important to my existence. So that was a lesson I learned really young, is that no matter what I did, whether I was working in the entertainment industry, whether I am you know, working in wellness, whether I'm an executive, whether I'm a healer, um, all the many many hats that I've worn in my life, I don't hang my confidence or my self perception on any of them, which gives me an opportunity to be a little bit more curious about my existence and gives me an opportunity to be very fluid in the way that I show up, in the way that I share myself. And so that piece of it is quite a bit of purpose work of just really honoring that deeper calling um and and growing the gifts, because when you understand what your gifts are and how you believe at this moment you're meant to serve in the world, UM, it takes some of the fear off of sharing yourself. You know, we are all multidimensional, multi hyphen it beings. I really want to always strive to live by that. I do not like being placed in a box. I do not like being called a certain title, and I do not like nor appreciate the way that social media has made us have to have an elevator pitch about ourselves at old times in our bios, and we have to you know, quote unquote clearly convey you know, what evaluations about ourselves or how we value ourselves. So that is one I just want to get that out there and say that because for those that don't know, that is a path. You can do multiple things and you don't have to kind of in a very sustenant way like condense and form and define yourself because I am a healer and I am someone that is highly intuitive and gifted, also highly trained wellness educator and facilitator and a bunch of other things. So when I say, first, investigate that the the relationship you have with the way that you display yourself to others, and investigate that a little bit and see if there's room to kind of stretch that a little bit, change that a little bit. UM your validation being the most your own validation being the most important. UM feedback that you receive is important for you to be able to occupy space in any and all of the ways that you're meant to being alive. I think it's also really important to get into a place of sovereignty within yourself where you are your leader, you are your guide outside of your connection to God and higher power. UM, you know you are also showing up in that way for yourself, and you're showing up in an ownership of who you truly are in your authenticity. UM. There are so many things I'm interested in. So this, you know, so far, I've had an entertainment media career, you know, by career standards, author other things. But there's a lot of other things I want to do that may make no sense to anybody. At some point, I may be a craftsman, you know, I may make furniture at some point, um, but I'm not going to go around just calling myself that. So I just want to put out put that out. There is one stream of thought around this, and in another way, I say, just start, you know, just start. You know who you are, you can really trust that, you can trust that you are enough. You can trust that the things that have been laid on your heart have value to being in the world. So if you are called to occupy space public facing, to pronounce yourself, to put yourself and your work out there, I guarantee you can trust it. That would not be in your awareness if that was not meant for you, if that was not a way you were meant to push and stretch yourself. And then I think, you know, when you start doing that, then you get to really know how how how do I want to best convey who I am and what I do? And how I serve to others. And once you get to that point, you'll find yourself having to do it again, and do it again, and do it again, to stay fluid with who you are. Your purpose is your healing and your authenticity. Through that, you share yourself and your gifts in a multitude of ways. Some will have a title, some will earn money, some will not. But when you get connected to your authentic self, what your authentic goals are, um, what your authentic gifts are, excuse me, it makes it a lot easier to just kind of blindly step out on faith and try things out. That's something I've really wanted to be in practice with, especially the last couple of years, and like, all right, let me throw it against the wall. I feel this, I connect to this. Maybe other people will. If they don't, I still like it. If they do, cool, that lets me know that there's a space for that. But as you make it less about other people, less about how you're being perceived, less about how you wish to be received by others, you open up a lot, a lot, a lot of fertile soil for so many things to be made manifest. You know, occupying space as a healer. That is who you innately are, if that's what you're resonating with inside of yourself. Whether other people use that terminology or not, whether other people connect to you in that way or not, does not matter at all. The truth of who you are is the truth of who you are. So I encourage you to just practice stepping out, little by little whatever feels good for you. But know that you can't fail at this. And know that if anyone has criticisms, criticisms for you, or misunderstands you in some way, you don't have to let it in. You don't have to take on that projection. Your purpose, your gifts, your authenticity are known to you, and they're known by God. So connect to that next question I got says dealing with reoccurring anger. You thought that you had resolved. What do I do? There's this quote that I love. Um, if the pain is deep, you will have to rely. You sit over and over again. Our core wounding that is typically the catalyst for all the other woundings. We attract the woundings we give others the way that we experience ourselves and our emotions. UM, that piece of it is, it's a curriculum. That we're always going to be in study with. That is the core curriculum of this lifetime. So anger is typically not about the moment that we're getting angry, but it's about all the other times that this has happened, all the other times at the very young ages that we maybe we're not able to get angry. And so we're constantly playing that out over and over and over and over again in our lives with other people with different scenarios. We're playing it at at work, we're playing it out with friends, we're playing it out with lovers, you know. Um, So it's important to recognize your pattern of anger first. Notice when do I tend to get most angry? What gets me angry? Um? What are the moments that I feel like this anger really needs to be released or that I'm overwhelmed by it? Within the spiritual practice I believe in sacred rage, I don't think we need to be avoiding our anger. I think we need to be really curious about our anger, understanding it, getting to the deeper layers of it. And even though some of our core curriculum is something that we're always going to be in play and process with over and over again, for our lives. The really beautiful thing about it is there's always deeper to go. So the way that you relate to it is going to begin to shift and change, even if the past can't. Even if something still feels like it has a misunderstanding or a little bit of charge. Over time, the way you relate to that internal anger will change, which means the effect it has, the power it as in other aspects of our lives, gets to change and gets to be more so for our highest good. I hope that was helpful. It might do a whole show about that in Sacred Rage, because that is very very important. Also, I want to say, you know, if if for anybody listening that does some um anger is a piece of your life. The way that you experience it, um there's there's charge. Consider building as your healing and as you're growing your daily practice, consider building out time for rage. So what that could look like could be a boxing class where you really give yourself permission to scream to punch. It could be you know, doing some somatic work, um doing some fossil work. I've done a lot of work with the muscle whisper who's on Instagram, Jackie. She is a queen, she is a master UM and that was really really powerful for my life. Getting you know, that kind of deep, deep fossil work while also being able to scream like you maybe never screamed before, or to cry it out could be really incredible. Maybe find even to one of those rooms that they offer places. Um, not an escape room, but what's the other one. There's like, oh, I forget what it's called, but it's like a room that you can go in. Google it. It's a room that you can go in and you can just break a bunch of stuff. You pay money, you walk in this room, you get to throw things against the wall, you get to break things with a hammer. Um, consider doing something that can feed that piece of you, because if we're connecting to anger, it means there are some things that still want to be released. There are some things that still want to be expressed. And very often it's not a need to release or express at the current present moment situation of anger. It's a real need and sire to do that for things in the past that you think you're making up for by doing it now. Very often, for scenarios that don't actually require or deserve that level of anger. So just for your consideration, UM, and i'd be really interested in the person that wrote that question if you want to share on social the way that you resonated with it. All right, I think we have enough time to do one more question, but this has been pretty awesome. I might do this pretty regularly. Okay, UM, let's see. Oh, I got a question about the women who He'll Retreat that I am doing with Queen Afua at the Omega Institute the last week of September. UM, asking about any preparation that should be done. So, if you're listening to this and you're coming to the women who He'll Retreat, we have an email coming your way in a couple of weeks that's going to include a whole list of the ways to prepare. But thank you for saying that. And I got you from my final question. This is really really, really powerful. How do you heal your connection to your intuition after abuse or sexual abuse? Mm hmm yeah. Experiencing abuse, UM, experiencing abuse of any kind emotional, mental, physical, spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, it can very often completely rob us of our intuition. It completely can shut off that part of you, especially if you weren't allowed to use your intuition when you felt it. If you are gaslet about your intuition, or if you had an intuition and we're not able to act on it, um even by your own means, um, it can really thrust that out of us. On a spiritual lens, you know, um abuses really heavily affect your sacred and your solar solar plexus chakra, and the sacred chakra is connected to our ability to create. Uh. It is in the womb space that is underneath your navel and right above your genitals, and that area is the seat of our creative power. And so very often it is believed from a spiritual lens that if you experience sexual abuse, that is where you take the greatest wounding, which then affects everything else about your life. Your sacred is also where your intuition is really cultivated, where you get that terminology. Listen to your gut, trust your gut, your gut instinct. It's really in more ancient terms speaking to connect to your sacred, feel the energy of your sacred, let that guide you. And so one I would say, consider a multi pronged approach. You're going to need to heal from abuse, You're going to need to really have a holistic lens through which you view yourself and you view your healing journey, which means a multi pronged approach of nourishing yourself and healing and growing yourself mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually is your pathway through and out. So that could mean equipping yourself if able with therapy, could be a cognitive therapy, could be a behavioral therapy. Speaking to a professional that understands the effects of abuse and trauma on the brain and the body is very important. Next, a somatic approach. When you experience abuse, and especially if you experience sexual abuse, you become disconnected from your physical body. You have this feeling of even jumping out of your body to completely disconnect from the experiences happening. And when that happens, um, it disconnects you from yourself, from the present moment, from your ability to be regulated and meet your needs. And so a somatic approach could be really beautiful for that, and that is really expansive. That somatic category is really expansive. UM, So play around with that a little bit, really spend time researching, because the thing is I trust that God, that spirit that our own hearts guides us to the teachers and the tools that we need. So even if you decide I am going to carve out an hour on a Saturday or Sunday, whatever day is open and expensive for you, I'm gonna sit down and I'm gonna ground. Because the thing is, even when you're looking for help, it is very triggering. It can n b it's bringing up the wound, it's making you look at it, face it. So sometimes we avoid getting help because we don't even want to think about the hurt to get the help. So light a candle, take some deep centering breaths, set an intention. God, please guide me towards the tools, the teachers, and the resources I need for my journey that I need to heal and grow. And then start searching and reading. Start looking and reading, you will know what connects with you. It will also give you a better view of who is in your area that can really assist you. But type in healing, sexual trauma, healing abuse UM, type in so matic therapy, type in breathwork, type in tapping. Start to see what's possible and really get clear on what your needs are. In even if you don't know them, just start looking. It's okay to not know too, But think about that, what do I need? What do I want to feel? How do I want to be free? UM? You might even want to consider hugging therapy. You may may may or may not. Those listening be familiar with that, UM, and I've seen it featured in some TV programs, but I think it was done in a way that was not an integrity and really honoring the depth of the work. It was more done in a silly way, you know. But touch therapy, hugging therapy is really powerful. If you were abused and you didn't receive the safety, the nurturing, the protection that you deserved in those abuses, you need to be held. You need to have the opportunity to cry. You need to have the opportunity to know that you are being witnessed in your pain, held and cared for. UM. There's many other things that I just hope everything UM can come to mind in this moment. I want to answer this question fully, but yes, you'll need to connect to a multi pronged approach UM and do your best to be consistent with that. Go gently, but there are resources that can meet your needs. And you know, sometimes even setting that intention, saying a prayer, doing a visualization and meditation of I want to heal from my abuse, I want to heal from my sexual abuse. God Guides, Universe, source, Creator, please show me my step forward, show me the aligned teachers, show me the aligned resources that are right, correct and safe for me. You have a power to call this in and I do believe that the divine right opportunities and alignments will meet you on this path. And thank you for asking that question. UM also a smaller way to practice with intuition for those that are looking to supercharge their intuition or just connect at a deeper level for the maybe the first time, practice in small ways, low risk environments. You know, make notations in a notebook every time you have an awareness about something, whether it's a work decision, a personal life decision, but if something is coming in and telling you a very clear thought and message, even if it's yes, no, this person is, don't do that, go this way, date it, time it, write it down. Whether you act on that intuition or not, you're keeping a record of the truth of the way that your intuition operates, your divine connection and then look back at it without judgment. You know, if you move forward and you go against your intuition, just look back and say, wow, I knew the better choice to make. Why did I make that choice? You know, if you're making a different choice than what you're intuition tells you and it doesn't go in the way that you thought, just honor that. You don't have to feel bad. You don't have to feel like a failure. You don't have to judge yourself. There's always more and new choices to make, but you can start to understand, you know what, I really did get it right the first time. I can trust myself. That's the way to start building it. Um. I'd like to have fun with it in traffic, to like which way should I go? Should I exit here? And then I find out yes or no, I either get stuck in more traffic or following my gut proved right. And those small ways help you refine, But keep track of the bigger ways. Write them down, um, and you'll definitely see a difference. You'll see an expansion there. All right, we've reached the end of the show. I think I only managed to get through four or five questions but I love this, so I'm gonna do it again, and I'm probably gonna do another episode going through more of the questions that were sent in on Instagram. Thank you for listening to this show. Thank you to everyone that asked a question. I hope that some of the things that I shared felt resonant or helpful um in some way that grows you. And as always, thank you for joining me on this episode. Share this episode with a friend, and if you feel so called, go ahead and drop that five star review and at a rating and write something too if you have the time, all right, catch you next week. Big love, Noma stamatamatamasta. Hey. Find me on social let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's Twitter and Instagram, or go to my website, Debbie Brown dot com. And if you're listening to the show on Apple Podcasts, please please please don't forget to rate, review and subscribe and send this episode to a friend. Dropping Jim's is the production of I Heart Radio and The Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jack Please and me Debbie Brown. For more podcast from my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows, mmmmmm

M from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl ill two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the backs of diamond eyed school children who grew into hymnals recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots. To keep the warmth of their blood, be wise, be smart, being black, opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of jim see. King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife, wife told her daughter, and daughter told the as this is. And the ancestors told me that you would come to give wisdom of thousands. They said you would come dropping Dropping the Gem. Welcome back to another episode of the Dropping Gems podcast. I'm Debbie Brown. This week I am going to do a special Q and a episode of this show. I get a lot of questions on my social media, sometimes to my inbox, and so I realized that something I haven't done really since season one is just do a nice little Q and A with the community with a collective and answer some questions. So I decided to do that this episode, and a couple of days ago, I posed a question on my Instagram story for those that follow if you don't, I'm at Debbie Brown on I G and all the Places, and I said, what are some questions that you have about mindfulness, the spiritual journey life that you would like for me to explore on the Dropping Gyms podcast. So all the questions today, and I got actually a couple of hundred questions, so I don't know if I can get through all of those, but I wanted to find questions that have themes that a lot of people were connecting to. So I'm going to be reading directly off my i G answering questions that come in. I'm going to hold space for it to be anonymous, so I'm not going to share anyone's names, and I'm going to be connecting to the questions that I consider, um, maybe I haven't explored often enough on this podcast that can't already be found in my work, and also answer questions that it just seems like a lot of people are asking. So let's go ahead and get started. I hope everybody is having a blessed week. Thank you for joining me. It's been a really cool season this year. I've been having a lot of conversations I love, so I just want to throw too. If you haven't yet, highly recommend a couple of episodes that you might connect to. One was an episode that I really really loved recently was with Rasmamerican. We talked about somatics, we talked about trauma. Another episode that I loved was with Barba Schmidt, who is just such an inspiring, amazing woman um and she she shared a lot of thoughts on spirituality, the spiritual journey, self forgiveness, expanding outside of things you might have experienced in your younger life. And another episode that was recent that I really loved was with Dr Sheila Marie Campbell, who is a doctor of Chinese medicine and incredible elemental acupuncturist, and she spoke a lot about the way that energy moves in life and your body, in your health, and sacred partnership and sacred child rearing. So you might take those episodes, check those out. I've got my questions up now, so I'm gonna just dive into the questions, gives some answer us and we'll spend a little bit of time together. And as always, I highly recommend if you feel called, grab a journal, grab a blanket, light a candle, get cozy if that's the possibility for you, UM or type some notes in your phone, anything that feels resonant, make sure you write it down. Type it down, because your spirit wants to know it all right. The first question UM that I want to connect to is I normally enjoy my yoga and meditation, but lately I've been feeling too drained to do it. I love this question because I think this is a question that everyone can really relate to, myself included. And I have actually a podcast episode about this you might dig called Healing Fatigue. So the thing about you know, personal growth, the thing about healing self um or expanding in general, is it does take a lot out of you physically and emotionally. So never underestimate the physical effects that can happen when we're doing deep process or we are trying on new ways of being in new practices. There is absolutely a fatigue to it that isn't talked about enough. You know, if you are kind of moving through some very specific parts of your spiritual curriculum right now, or if you're really expanding the way that you know yourself, it's exhausting, and it's exhausting because your mind is constantly going, your heart is constantly you know, releasing grief, creating space, and that requires a lot of us mentally, emotionally and spiritually a lot. You know, doing the work is not easy, and I try to always frame it through its benefits but also through its real process, which is time intensive, energy intensive. So kudos to you one for taking a moment to know is yourself and your body and how you are currently relating to your practice, because that is very important. Your practice can always grow, it can always change, and you can always press pause. So from a personal standpoint, you know, depending on where I may be, and I'm in a I'm in a really um, beautiful fertile soil in my life right now. But I also spent years in deep process doing the deeper kind of psychoanalytical, emotional and physical work of healing myself of traumatic experiences, and I absolutely needed at some points to take breaks. So I have absolutely in my path taken a month off, taken two months off, taken three months off. Try not to exceed that because I know it. It's not a service to me. You know, I know how much I need my spiritual practice and also how much I really love it, how much it adds to my life. So I try not to stretch it past taking a three month break. When I do take breaks, I'm very intentional about the breaks. I don't take a break from my practice and then say, since I'm not doing my practice, I'm gonna binge television, I'm gonna binge food. I'm gonna, you know, just give over to a reversal of all the work that I've done. I just decide not to do those particular things and to take the time I would have spent on that to rest. So if you take a break, do it with intention, do it with thoughtfulness. And taking a break does not mean reversing to factory settings, and it doesn't mean that you're going to do the opposite, which means engage in unconscious behavior, you know, do things that are not really serving to who you are and who you have bloomed to be. Take a break very simply follow your gut, follow your intuition, and if you are specifically tired. This question specifically spoke to meditation in yoga. If you would have spent maybe an hour ninety minutes, two hours on that practice, then just take a break from that couple of hours. Don't take a break from your life, take a break from the couple of hours of your practice, and instead of doing those things, consider doing something else like sleep, like taking a warm bath, um, something that nourishes you and really honors the tiredness that you're feeling. That was a really good question. I think a lot of us can relate to that. Oh, I love this, I love this question. UM. This next question that I want to bring forward says how to deal with a parent with anxiety while also working through your own. So a big moment in time that we're in is that many of us, especially if you are somewhere on the spectrum of the millennial generation, which pretty vast. You could be in your forties or you could be in your very late twenties, is part of our awakening and our consciousness is found in reparenting. A lot of us have to do the work of reparenting. Um. A lot of us have to do the work of excavating a mother wound or a father wound, or a both wound. And so these are conversations that in this age bracket, especially between late twenties UM, going into probably mid forties, we might find ourselves talking about a lot more. We're doing a lot of them learning around unconscious behavior and parenting, a lot of them learning around wounding and the way trauma is carried through generations. So this is not an easy answer that I'm going to give you, but I want you to know this is something that is actively being worked on, worked on right now by most likely millions of people. So I highly suggest equipping yourself with the tools to meet that. The way that I interpreted this question, because it's said how to deal with a parent with anxiety while also working through your own UM, I'm assuming that the person that wrote this question is speaking about their parents, So I would really recommend um doing some deeper research on that apparent with anxiety. UM, there's probably something you might have been experiencing since your childhood. What that really shows is, UH, they have potentially an inability to regulate their emotions. If you have an inability to regulate your emotions, most likely, UM, you had childhood wounding of some kind or experience the later life trauma. But at some point, UM, you disconnected from the ability to be settled in choice as you're having experiences and or you miss the opportunity to build your authentic core identity. And so if this is what you're facing with a parent or a previous caregiver in your life, UM, look up the terms emotionally immature parenting. There are some books around this. UM. I highly recommend for those that this is their lived experience dealing with emotionally immature parents UM gas lighting of any kind, withholding of any kind, but an unhealthy dynamic with a parent, take some time look into books that have to do with experiencing parents who are emotionally immature, parents that have mental health concerns, parents that have borderline personality disorder UM that could be of a lot of help, and there are some workbooks for that. So this is a process. This is not a one tip or try that I can share to say, oh, just do this or take a deep breath, because this has most likely been a life long hardship for you, a lifelong challenge, and depending on how old you are and how old your parent is you might have a few more decades of this, and typically at certain ages people can only change so far, so they might be able to lessen um some of the pains, some of the impact of their behavior. But the more time that passes, the harder it is for your neural pathways to be rewired so that you can actually see changed behavior. So sending a lot of compassion to you, a lot of love to you, and also equip yourself with knowledge. Knowledge is the secret here because it makes it less personal of how it feels to you when your parent may be behaving in a way that feels triggering. Mm hmm. All right, so let's see. I'm looking through some questions as we're talking. Um mm hmm. Okay, I think this is a good question. A question that I received is how can my boyfriend start being more motivated? He has great goals but never goes or it. Whether this is for those listening, if you relate to the role of boyfriend, or if this is a friend in your life or a family member in your life, you know the best thing to do in scenarios like this is to really encourage them to seek outside help. It's important that if you are in a love partnership. We're definitely meant to elevate one another, help each other grow, learn from each other, teach each other. But you want to be careful about taking on the role of caretaker and taking on the role of parents for this person or mama for this person. Um. It is not a path that will serve you long term, and it's not a path that will serve them either. So I would definitely recommend that instead of considering yourself their personal cheerleader or you know, their encourager, their motivator, their parents, getting them to do things that their lives are not used to, getting them to treat themselves in a way that they haven't go for things that, um, they haven't been able to so far. Consider you know, getting them, um reading some books that could grow their self esteem, connecting them with a coach if that is monetarily feasible, UM, some content, some videos and movies, especially since you said boyfriend, you know, a book, a book that can resonate um. Actually a movie that could resonate with them because it really speaks for more of a masculine lens is Finding Joe, which is about the work of Joseph Campbell it's really really really powerful documentary. Have been recommending it for maybe nine years. They used to buy it for everyone. Um. But yeah, shifted from this being your responsibility because there is only stress and hardship to be found for that, and not um deeper intimacy and consider um encouraging them to investigate their childhood and their early woundings. Typically, if people have a creativity inside of them, have a vision inside of them that they're not able to express, it comes across to us as lack of motivation like oh gosh, just stop me in so lazy or just get out there and do it um, which is understandable, but in actuality like this person has. Potentially one of the possibilities could be that they had really great ideas as a child and weren't around adults that supported that, or they're around people that constantly criticize them, or they were never celebrated when they did actually go for something, and so there is a wounding that they don't even necessarily remember birth that exists inside of them that keeps them from becoming more, that keeps them from having the esteem, the internal fire, the fearlessness that could allow them to really go for their dreams for their goals or to really use the gifts that you may see so clearly that they are not sharing with the world. So the biggest point of advice here is do not take on the responsibility of this UM. It will not end well for either party. But continue encouraging with detachment from outcome. Not in a coach way, not in a parental way, but in an authentic way where you really see them and what they're trying to do. Don't project, don't overly criticize UM. This issue is deeper than you and your relationship, so finding things about inner child healing, finding things about being able to own who you are UM could be really helpful for them. So start suggesting maybe some podcasts UM if you know of them, or you know, really express your desire to help them become more of who you know them to be, but without taking on the role of being the teacher, and encourage them to seek outside help, to seek out someone to talk to, to grow their community, to grow their friend group so that they can start having some new perspectives. They can start connecting to people who really see them and see their strengths. Then just go slowly, move slowly, rocking so a question I got. Um, there's so many good questions. The question that I got that I'm gonna read is something that has been coming forward a lot more as more and more people are choosing unique paths of service or unique ways of showing up in their purpose. So this question says, what steps did you take in showing up online as a healer in the beginning of your pivot. I have a couple of different ways that I want to answer this question, because you know, something about myself is I do not see myself in a role. I don't see myself in terms of a title. I don't see myself in terms of um projections or perceptions from other people. So I'm somebody and this is you know, I'm all of my chart. I'm a Gemini son Jim and I moon Leo. Rising my autonomy and not existing in a box is really important to my existence. So that was a lesson I learned really young, is that no matter what I did, whether I was working in the entertainment industry, whether I am you know, working in wellness, whether I'm an executive, whether I'm a healer, um, all the many many hats that I've worn in my life, I don't hang my confidence or my self perception on any of them, which gives me an opportunity to be a little bit more curious about my existence and gives me an opportunity to be very fluid in the way that I show up, in the way that I share myself. And so that piece of it is quite a bit of purpose work of just really honoring that deeper calling um and and growing the gifts, because when you understand what your gifts are and how you believe at this moment you're meant to serve in the world, UM, it takes some of the fear off of sharing yourself. You know, we are all multidimensional, multi hyphen it beings. I really want to always strive to live by that. I do not like being placed in a box. I do not like being called a certain title, and I do not like nor appreciate the way that social media has made us have to have an elevator pitch about ourselves at old times in our bios, and we have to you know, quote unquote clearly convey you know, what evaluations about ourselves or how we value ourselves. So that is one I just want to get that out there and say that because for those that don't know, that is a path. You can do multiple things and you don't have to kind of in a very sustenant way like condense and form and define yourself because I am a healer and I am someone that is highly intuitive and gifted, also highly trained wellness educator and facilitator and a bunch of other things. So when I say, first, investigate that the the relationship you have with the way that you display yourself to others, and investigate that a little bit and see if there's room to kind of stretch that a little bit, change that a little bit. UM your validation being the most your own validation being the most important. UM feedback that you receive is important for you to be able to occupy space in any and all of the ways that you're meant to being alive. I think it's also really important to get into a place of sovereignty within yourself where you are your leader, you are your guide outside of your connection to God and higher power. UM, you know you are also showing up in that way for yourself, and you're showing up in an ownership of who you truly are in your authenticity. UM. There are so many things I'm interested in. So this, you know, so far, I've had an entertainment media career, you know, by career standards, author other things. But there's a lot of other things I want to do that may make no sense to anybody. At some point, I may be a craftsman, you know, I may make furniture at some point, um, but I'm not going to go around just calling myself that. So I just want to put out put that out. There is one stream of thought around this, and in another way, I say, just start, you know, just start. You know who you are, you can really trust that, you can trust that you are enough. You can trust that the things that have been laid on your heart have value to being in the world. So if you are called to occupy space public facing, to pronounce yourself, to put yourself and your work out there, I guarantee you can trust it. That would not be in your awareness if that was not meant for you, if that was not a way you were meant to push and stretch yourself. And then I think, you know, when you start doing that, then you get to really know how how how do I want to best convey who I am and what I do? And how I serve to others. And once you get to that point, you'll find yourself having to do it again, and do it again, and do it again, to stay fluid with who you are. Your purpose is your healing and your authenticity. Through that, you share yourself and your gifts in a multitude of ways. Some will have a title, some will earn money, some will not. But when you get connected to your authentic self, what your authentic goals are, um, what your authentic gifts are, excuse me, it makes it a lot easier to just kind of blindly step out on faith and try things out. That's something I've really wanted to be in practice with, especially the last couple of years, and like, all right, let me throw it against the wall. I feel this, I connect to this. Maybe other people will. If they don't, I still like it. If they do, cool, that lets me know that there's a space for that. But as you make it less about other people, less about how you're being perceived, less about how you wish to be received by others, you open up a lot, a lot, a lot of fertile soil for so many things to be made manifest. You know, occupying space as a healer. That is who you innately are, if that's what you're resonating with inside of yourself. Whether other people use that terminology or not, whether other people connect to you in that way or not, does not matter at all. The truth of who you are is the truth of who you are. So I encourage you to just practice stepping out, little by little whatever feels good for you. But know that you can't fail at this. And know that if anyone has criticisms, criticisms for you, or misunderstands you in some way, you don't have to let it in. You don't have to take on that projection. Your purpose, your gifts, your authenticity are known to you, and they're known by God. So connect to that next question I got says dealing with reoccurring anger. You thought that you had resolved. What do I do? There's this quote that I love. Um, if the pain is deep, you will have to rely. You sit over and over again. Our core wounding that is typically the catalyst for all the other woundings. We attract the woundings we give others the way that we experience ourselves and our emotions. UM, that piece of it is, it's a curriculum. That we're always going to be in study with. That is the core curriculum of this lifetime. So anger is typically not about the moment that we're getting angry, but it's about all the other times that this has happened, all the other times at the very young ages that we maybe we're not able to get angry. And so we're constantly playing that out over and over and over and over again in our lives with other people with different scenarios. We're playing it at at work, we're playing it out with friends, we're playing it out with lovers, you know. Um, So it's important to recognize your pattern of anger first. Notice when do I tend to get most angry? What gets me angry? Um? What are the moments that I feel like this anger really needs to be released or that I'm overwhelmed by it? Within the spiritual practice I believe in sacred rage, I don't think we need to be avoiding our anger. I think we need to be really curious about our anger, understanding it, getting to the deeper layers of it. And even though some of our core curriculum is something that we're always going to be in play and process with over and over again, for our lives. The really beautiful thing about it is there's always deeper to go. So the way that you relate to it is going to begin to shift and change, even if the past can't. Even if something still feels like it has a misunderstanding or a little bit of charge. Over time, the way you relate to that internal anger will change, which means the effect it has, the power it as in other aspects of our lives, gets to change and gets to be more so for our highest good. I hope that was helpful. It might do a whole show about that in Sacred Rage, because that is very very important. Also, I want to say, you know, if if for anybody listening that does some um anger is a piece of your life. The way that you experience it, um there's there's charge. Consider building as your healing and as you're growing your daily practice, consider building out time for rage. So what that could look like could be a boxing class where you really give yourself permission to scream to punch. It could be you know, doing some somatic work, um doing some fossil work. I've done a lot of work with the muscle whisper who's on Instagram, Jackie. She is a queen, she is a master UM and that was really really powerful for my life. Getting you know, that kind of deep, deep fossil work while also being able to scream like you maybe never screamed before, or to cry it out could be really incredible. Maybe find even to one of those rooms that they offer places. Um, not an escape room, but what's the other one. There's like, oh, I forget what it's called, but it's like a room that you can go in. Google it. It's a room that you can go in and you can just break a bunch of stuff. You pay money, you walk in this room, you get to throw things against the wall, you get to break things with a hammer. Um, consider doing something that can feed that piece of you, because if we're connecting to anger, it means there are some things that still want to be released. There are some things that still want to be expressed. And very often it's not a need to release or express at the current present moment situation of anger. It's a real need and sire to do that for things in the past that you think you're making up for by doing it now. Very often, for scenarios that don't actually require or deserve that level of anger. So just for your consideration, UM, and i'd be really interested in the person that wrote that question if you want to share on social the way that you resonated with it. All right, I think we have enough time to do one more question, but this has been pretty awesome. I might do this pretty regularly. Okay, UM, let's see. Oh, I got a question about the women who He'll Retreat that I am doing with Queen Afua at the Omega Institute the last week of September. UM, asking about any preparation that should be done. So, if you're listening to this and you're coming to the women who He'll Retreat, we have an email coming your way in a couple of weeks that's going to include a whole list of the ways to prepare. But thank you for saying that. And I got you from my final question. This is really really, really powerful. How do you heal your connection to your intuition after abuse or sexual abuse? Mm hmm yeah. Experiencing abuse, UM, experiencing abuse of any kind emotional, mental, physical, spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, it can very often completely rob us of our intuition. It completely can shut off that part of you, especially if you weren't allowed to use your intuition when you felt it. If you are gaslet about your intuition, or if you had an intuition and we're not able to act on it, um even by your own means, um, it can really thrust that out of us. On a spiritual lens, you know, um abuses really heavily affect your sacred and your solar solar plexus chakra, and the sacred chakra is connected to our ability to create. Uh. It is in the womb space that is underneath your navel and right above your genitals, and that area is the seat of our creative power. And so very often it is believed from a spiritual lens that if you experience sexual abuse, that is where you take the greatest wounding, which then affects everything else about your life. Your sacred is also where your intuition is really cultivated, where you get that terminology. Listen to your gut, trust your gut, your gut instinct. It's really in more ancient terms speaking to connect to your sacred, feel the energy of your sacred, let that guide you. And so one I would say, consider a multi pronged approach. You're going to need to heal from abuse, You're going to need to really have a holistic lens through which you view yourself and you view your healing journey, which means a multi pronged approach of nourishing yourself and healing and growing yourself mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually is your pathway through and out. So that could mean equipping yourself if able with therapy, could be a cognitive therapy, could be a behavioral therapy. Speaking to a professional that understands the effects of abuse and trauma on the brain and the body is very important. Next, a somatic approach. When you experience abuse, and especially if you experience sexual abuse, you become disconnected from your physical body. You have this feeling of even jumping out of your body to completely disconnect from the experiences happening. And when that happens, um, it disconnects you from yourself, from the present moment, from your ability to be regulated and meet your needs. And so a somatic approach could be really beautiful for that, and that is really expansive. That somatic category is really expansive. UM, So play around with that a little bit, really spend time researching, because the thing is I trust that God, that spirit that our own hearts guides us to the teachers and the tools that we need. So even if you decide I am going to carve out an hour on a Saturday or Sunday, whatever day is open and expensive for you, I'm gonna sit down and I'm gonna ground. Because the thing is, even when you're looking for help, it is very triggering. It can n b it's bringing up the wound, it's making you look at it, face it. So sometimes we avoid getting help because we don't even want to think about the hurt to get the help. So light a candle, take some deep centering breaths, set an intention. God, please guide me towards the tools, the teachers, and the resources I need for my journey that I need to heal and grow. And then start searching and reading. Start looking and reading, you will know what connects with you. It will also give you a better view of who is in your area that can really assist you. But type in healing, sexual trauma, healing abuse UM, type in so matic therapy, type in breathwork, type in tapping. Start to see what's possible and really get clear on what your needs are. In even if you don't know them, just start looking. It's okay to not know too, But think about that, what do I need? What do I want to feel? How do I want to be free? UM? You might even want to consider hugging therapy. You may may may or may not. Those listening be familiar with that, UM, and I've seen it featured in some TV programs, but I think it was done in a way that was not an integrity and really honoring the depth of the work. It was more done in a silly way, you know. But touch therapy, hugging therapy is really powerful. If you were abused and you didn't receive the safety, the nurturing, the protection that you deserved in those abuses, you need to be held. You need to have the opportunity to cry. You need to have the opportunity to know that you are being witnessed in your pain, held and cared for. UM. There's many other things that I just hope everything UM can come to mind in this moment. I want to answer this question fully, but yes, you'll need to connect to a multi pronged approach UM and do your best to be consistent with that. Go gently, but there are resources that can meet your needs. And you know, sometimes even setting that intention, saying a prayer, doing a visualization and meditation of I want to heal from my abuse, I want to heal from my sexual abuse. God Guides, Universe, source, Creator, please show me my step forward, show me the aligned teachers, show me the aligned resources that are right, correct and safe for me. You have a power to call this in and I do believe that the divine right opportunities and alignments will meet you on this path. And thank you for asking that question. UM also a smaller way to practice with intuition for those that are looking to supercharge their intuition or just connect at a deeper level for the maybe the first time, practice in small ways, low risk environments. You know, make notations in a notebook every time you have an awareness about something, whether it's a work decision, a personal life decision, but if something is coming in and telling you a very clear thought and message, even if it's yes, no, this person is, don't do that, go this way, date it, time it, write it down. Whether you act on that intuition or not, you're keeping a record of the truth of the way that your intuition operates, your divine connection and then look back at it without judgment. You know, if you move forward and you go against your intuition, just look back and say, wow, I knew the better choice to make. Why did I make that choice? You know, if you're making a different choice than what you're intuition tells you and it doesn't go in the way that you thought, just honor that. You don't have to feel bad. You don't have to feel like a failure. You don't have to judge yourself. There's always more and new choices to make, but you can start to understand, you know what, I really did get it right the first time. I can trust myself. That's the way to start building it. Um. I'd like to have fun with it in traffic, to like which way should I go? Should I exit here? And then I find out yes or no, I either get stuck in more traffic or following my gut proved right. And those small ways help you refine, But keep track of the bigger ways. Write them down, um, and you'll definitely see a difference. You'll see an expansion there. All right, we've reached the end of the show. I think I only managed to get through four or five questions but I love this, so I'm gonna do it again, and I'm probably gonna do another episode going through more of the questions that were sent in on Instagram. Thank you for listening to this show. Thank you to everyone that asked a question. I hope that some of the things that I shared felt resonant or helpful um in some way that grows you. And as always, thank you for joining me on this episode. Share this episode with a friend, and if you feel so called, go ahead and drop that five star review and at a rating and write something too if you have the time, all right, catch you next week. Big love, Noma stamatamatamasta. Hey. Find me on social let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's Twitter and Instagram, or go to my website, Debbie Brown dot com. And if you're listening to the show on Apple Podcasts, please please please don't forget to rate, review and subscribe and send this episode to a friend. Dropping Jim's is the production of I Heart Radio and The Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jack Please and me Debbie Brown. For more podcast from my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows, mmmmmm