I rushed my pregnant wife to the emergency room, and when we arrived, she started screaming. I grabbed the doctor and said, I think it's a contraction. He said, yes it is. But enough with the English lessons and let's find out what's wrong with your wife.

I rushed my pregnant wife to the emergency room, and when we arrived, she started screaming. I grabbed the doctor and said, I think it's a contraction. He said, yes it is. But enough with the English lessons and let's find out what's wrong with your wife.

Everybody knows seven eight nine? But why did seven eight nine? The doctor told seven to eat three squared meals a day.

Everybody knows seven eight nine? But why did seven eight nine? The doctor told seven to eat three squared meals a day.

What do you call a driver that's never been in an accident reckless?

What do you call a driver that's never been in an accident reckless?

What do you call a woman laying down in the street he laying?

What do you call a woman laying down in the street he laying?

Why do we stay in their hives all winter? Swarm?

Why do we stay in their hives all winter? Swarm?

I saw a turtle that kept repeating the third letter of the alphabet. It was a sea turtle.

I saw a turtle that kept repeating the third letter of the alphabet. It was a sea turtle.

What's faster than an escalator? An escal sooner?

What's faster than an escalator? An escal sooner?

I told my boss I needed a raise because three companies were after me. Turns out they were the electric, water, and internet companies.

I told my boss I needed a raise because three companies were after me. Turns out they were the electric, water, and internet companies.

Today, I was struggling to get my wife's attention, so I sat down on the sofa and looked comfortable. That did the trick.

Today, I was struggling to get my wife's attention, so I sat down on the sofa and looked comfortable. That did the trick.

Why shouldn't you order a six from Amazon? It's not Prime?

Why shouldn't you order a six from Amazon? It's not Prime?

What do you call celery that won't leave you alone? A stalker? Stay tuned for more Dad jokes after this short intermission.

What do you call celery that won't leave you alone? A stalker? Stay tuned for more Dad jokes after this short intermission.

The idea of having a beard used to be terrifying, but now it's growing on me.

The idea of having a beard used to be terrifying, but now it's growing on me.

I won't stop at a gas station that has a clean restroom sign. If they can't clean their own wristrooms, I'm not doing it for them.

I won't stop at a gas station that has a clean restroom sign. If they can't clean their own wristrooms, I'm not doing it for them.

I was caught knitting while driving. Policeman said pull over, I said, no, officer, just a scarf.

I was caught knitting while driving. Policeman said pull over, I said, no, officer, just a scarf.

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made an appointment for tomorrow.

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made an appointment for tomorrow.

What is Matt Stone and Trey Parker's favorite beer, Hill Kenny?

What is Matt Stone and Trey Parker's favorite beer, Hill Kenny?

What did the judge say when the skump entered the courtroom? Order in the court, I'm Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones. Stick around until the end of the episode for a bonus joke. We are on a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide. Do us a favor and share a joke with your loved ones today.

What did the judge say when the skump entered the courtroom? Order in the court, I'm Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones. Stick around until the end of the episode for a bonus joke. We are on a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide. Do us a favor and share a joke with your loved ones today.

Looking for the gift for Dad, We have the official Daily Dad Jokes podcast electronic joke button, now available on Amazon. A massive five hundred preloaded Dad jokes guaranteed to make you laugh and groan. Check the show notes page for the link. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page for social media links and joke credits. This show was recorded in front of a can studio. My wife asked me why I spoke so softly in the house. I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening. Dot She laughed, SyRI laughed, Alexa laughed.

Looking for the gift for Dad, We have the official Daily Dad Jokes podcast electronic joke button, now available on Amazon. A massive five hundred preloaded Dad jokes guaranteed to make you laugh and groan. Check the show notes page for the link. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page for social media links and joke credits. This show was recorded in front of a can studio. My wife asked me why I spoke so softly in the house. I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening. Dot She laughed, SyRI laughed, Alexa laughed.