Dr. Brenda Fann Katula knew how to recognize alcohol addiction in an exam room. But when alcoholism took over her own home, the family physician who understood the diagnosis could not figure out how to make her husband choose sobriety—or explain to her nine-year-old son why Daddy wouldn't stop drinking.

The warning signs had been there from the beginning, like the handle of rum she expected to last for weeks disappearing in a weekend. Over time, his drinking escalated to a handle a day, a blood-alcohol level of 0.4 (enough to kill some people), severe withdrawal, hidden bottles, hospital stays, confused in a cornfield, and eventually death.

In Part 1 of this incredible two-part interview, Brenda explains the turning points that forced her to confront the truth, the safety plans she created for her children, and what she wishes she had done differently. She also explain one of the hardest, but most important, realizations the loved one of an addict / alcoholic can make: “I can’t work harder at his sobriety than he is."

Her husband had lost his parents and older sister in a car accident when he was ten and carried unresolved trauma, depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Now, Brenda is doing what she can to make sure the cycle of hurt, pain, and addiction doesn't claim another victim—whether that's the addict, or those he or she leaves behind.

We also talk about boundaries, enabling, church support, and what loved ones can do when they want recovery more than the person struggling does.

It's an important episode for anyone who loves someone who struggles with an addiction and is asking, "What do I do when my friend, loved one, sibling, or spouse won't stop drinking?"

Follow Brenda on Instagram: @brendafannkatula
Get Caroline Beidler's book for loved ones, When You Love Someone in Recovery 
Get Gospel-centered addiction recovery resources and help at veritasrecovery.org
Follow me: @jonseidl
Order my book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic
Watch this episode ad-free at The Vertias Daily

We explore:

— Why a physician could recognize alcoholism in her patients but resist seeing it in her marriage
— How childhood trauma, depression, anxiety, and PTSD contributed to her husband’s drinking
— What a 0.4 blood-alcohol level revealed about the severity of his dependence
— How gaslighting caused Brenda to question her judgment and chase his accusations
— The three moments that forced her to admit something had to change
— How Brenda protected her children without teaching them to hate their father
— Why love, medical knowledge, and hard work could not produce his sobriety
— How recovering alcoholics in their church recognized the signs and showed up

Dr. Brenda Fann Katula knew how to recognize alcohol addiction in an exam room. But when alcoholism took over her own home, the family physician who understood the diagnosis could not figure out how to make her husband choose sobriety&mdash;or explain to her nine-year-old son why Daddy wouldn't stop drinking.
The warning signs had been there from the beginning, like the handle of rum she expected to last for weeks disappearing in a weekend. Over time, his drinking escalated to a handle a day, a blood-alcohol level of 0.4 (enough to kill some people), severe withdrawal, hidden bottles, hospital stays, confused in a cornfield, and eventually death.
In Part 1 of this incredible two-part interview, Brenda explains the turning points that forced her to confront the truth, the safety plans she created for her children, and what she wishes she had done differently. She also explain one of the hardest, but most important, realizations the loved one of an addict / alcoholic can make: &ldquo;I can&rsquo;t work harder at his sobriety than he is."
Her husband had lost his parents and older sister in a car accident when he was ten and carried unresolved trauma, depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Now, Brenda is doing what she can to make sure the cycle of hurt, pain, and addiction doesn't claim another victim&mdash;whether that's the addict, or those he or she leaves behind.
We also talk about boundaries, enabling, church support, and what loved ones can do when they want recovery more than the person struggling does.
It's an important episode for anyone who loves someone who struggles with an addiction and is asking, "What do I do when my friend, loved one, sibling, or spouse won't stop drinking?"
Follow Brenda on Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/brendakfannkatula/">@brendafannkatula</a> Get Caroline Beidler's book for loved ones,&nbsp;<a href="https://amzn.to/4g9bEWN">When You Love Someone in Recovery&nbsp;</a> Get Gospel-centered addiction recovery resources and help at <a href="https://www.veritasrecovery.org">veritasrecovery.org</a> Follow me: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/jonseidl/">@jonseidl</a> Order my book, <a href="https://amzn.to/4opuOt">Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic</a> Watch this episode ad-free at <a href="https://jonseidl.substack.com/t/podcast">The Vertias Daily</a> We explore:
&mdash; Why a physician could recognize alcoholism in her patients but resist seeing it in her marriage &mdash; How childhood trauma, depression, anxiety, and PTSD contributed to her husband&rsquo;s drinking &mdash; What a 0.4 blood-alcohol level revealed about the severity of his dependence &mdash; How gaslighting caused Brenda to question her judgment and chase his accusations &mdash; The three moments that forced her to admit something had to change &mdash; How Brenda protected her children without teaching them to hate their father &mdash; Why love, medical knowledge, and hard work could not produce his sobriety &mdash; How recovering alcoholics in their church recognized the signs and showed up

Jon Seidl is the bestselling Christian author who became an alcoholic, not the other way around. It's usually the other way around. Or is it? "Confessions of a Christian alcoholic" (based on the book by the same title) is all about real stories, radical vulnerability, and remarkable comebacks of people who have struggled with alcoholism and addictions of all sorts. The show features interviews with fellow addicts and alcoholics as well as professionals in the fields of trauma, faith, and addiction recovery. Because let's be honest, we're all addicted to something. "Confessions" is a place for the desperate, the downtrodden, the destitute, and especially, the drunk. But it's also a place of hope and healing. Jon found sobriety after decades of struggling, but more importantly than finding sobriety, he found Jesus. In every episode, he gets radically vulnerable as he explores what it looks like to be on this journey of messy sanctification. Visit christianalcoholic.com for more resources.

Jon Seidl is the bestselling Christian author who became an alcoholic, not the other way around. It's usually the other way around. Or is it? "Confessions of a Christian alcoholic" (based on the book by the same title) is all about real stories, radical vulnerability, and remarkable comebacks of people who have struggled with alcoholism and addictions of all sorts. The show features interviews with fellow addicts and alcoholics as well as professionals in the fields of trauma, faith, and addiction recovery. Because let's be honest, we're all addicted to something. "Confessions" is a place for the desperate, the downtrodden, the destitute, and especially, the drunk. But it's also a place of hope and healing. Jon found sobriety after decades of struggling, but more importantly than finding sobriety, he found Jesus. In every episode, he gets radically vulnerable as he explores what it looks like to be on this journey of messy sanctification. Visit <a href="http://christianalcoholic.com/" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=http://christianalcoholic.com&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1747239325727000&amp;usg=AOvVaw1G-752Q-1dyjq6GN5gt7xw">christianalcoholic.com</a> for more resources.

Jon Seidl is the bestselling Christian author who became an alcoholic, not the other way around. It's usually the other way around. Or is it? "Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic" is all about real stories, radical vulnerability, and remarkable comebacks of people who have struggled with alcoholism and addictions of all sorts.

Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic with Jon Seidl

Married to an Alcoholic Pt. 1: When Your Spouse Won't Stop Drinking, with  Dr. (and Wife) Brenda Fann Katula

https://api.omny.fm/orgs/5e27a451-e6e6-4c51-aa03-a7370003783c/clips/c1e33655-622b-40ae-b205-b4ac000c759c/transcript