Lavell Crawford stops by Club Shay Shay for a laugh-filled discussion with Shannon Sharpe. First, Lavell discusses his friendly feud with Bruce Bruce (which started over Bruce Bruce’s comments on Club Shay Shay) over their similar sizes and recounts getting kicked off a plane for being belligerently drunk.
He shares his weight loss journey, driven by health complications and his sister, talks about his past food addiction and claims he would’ve eaten 300 hamburgers for $3000 at his heaviest. Lavell addresses the growing use of Ozempic for weight loss, especially among kids, and humorously compares Drake’s alleged BBL to a candy apple. He expresses his preference for cuisine over fast food, inventing the “Real Mac” and appreciating vegan salads.
Lavell also incidents of joke theft involving Katt Williams, Cedric the Entertainer and Tyler Perry, and reveals his supportive nature by spilling that he often writes jokes and punchlines for other comedians for free. He talks about the opportunity Steve Harvey gave him at the Hoodie Awards, reminisces about encounters with Rickey Smiley, Michael Jordan, and Charles Oakley, and shares his love story with his wife and their journey through struggles and successes.
Join Shannon Sharpe and Lavell Crawford for a crack up episode that explores comedy, personal transformation, and enduring relationships.
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You wanted to beat Mike Epsy. You remember that you madded him up. ID was like, damn Shanny, what you gonna do to little Mic? You was reaching that level of fame. You got your football fame. You're a Hall of Fame.
Yeah, I didn't see this level of fame coming, lavel I won Super Bowls. I'm into Hall of fame, but I'm ten times what I was then. I didn't expect that you had a humber on Nobody.
All my life, running all my life, sacrifice hustle, Patrick Prison One Slice, got the Brother Geist.
Swap all my life. I'd been grinding all my life, all my life, running all.
My life, sacrifics Hustle, Patrick pryceon One Slice, Doctor Brother of Geist Swap all my life.
I've been grinding all my life.
Come on, welcome to another episode of Club Sha Shape. I am your host, Shannon Sharp. I'm also the propriud of Club Sha Shape. The guy that's stopping buy for conversation on the drink today. You've seen him on the wind Emmy Award winning show Breaking Bad. He's won a SAG Award. He's nominated for a Grammy Best Comedy Album. One of the country's funniest comedians. He's an accomplished actor, writer, producer. He's one of the country's best touring comedians.
Guess what.
He's a scene stealing funny man. He's been making us laugh since nineteen ninety. He's your favorite comedian, favorite comedian, the one, the only LaBelle Crawford. Oh, keep on, keep on, keep on introducing.
Can't you say some more nice? Nice? I was like, damn, I ain't never been brought up like that. How you feeling today, I'm feeling wonderful.
Thank you for stopping by. I know you business. You're on the road all the time. I see y'all follow you on social media, and you're on the road all the time. So thank you for stopping by giving us a few moments of your time.
Brother, I thank you for coming up and let me come on. I've been wanting to come on now. My name been on here a few times with it they damn you. Yeah, like damn Shannon.
Talked about me.
Then you gave me a compliment and you asked me Bruce. Bruce said, we ain't had no beef. We had no beef till he came on here. Because you said some nice other there by my side night I said, no, he ain't your sad.
So now now now now we got me. Now you trying to put me in.
The world, So let mess your question. We will celebrate your career. You want you want to try somechee by La Portell. You want to try the water.
I'm gonna take it simp in your shaved by the poor table. But if I drink all dad shine and your stuff gonna get cancel you because I don't hold my tongue anyway. So I know that it's gonna be something else when if I get drunk.
But it's gonna be nice and smooth. You're gonna love that.
We're gonna be a smooth, nice one food controversial.
Yeah, let me know what you think. You not bad.
It's what it got is it is got it smooth, but it got that with the left hook.
And let you know it's still brown. I thought you, I thought we were gonna siep. I ain't know. You're gonna take it straight to the dog LaBelle.
From the Saint Louis. You don't do nothing but take it to the You don't get free liquors.
Like this all the damn time.
See I'm fancy this damn follow in. You gotta drink that fast for you movie.
You get it there, get.
You a little glad and go okay, that's it.
That's how they do. So I want to think, I want to thank you for pulling up? Can I you?
I want to talk about this because I never knew if I was gonna get an opportunity to sit down and have a conversation with you. And I wanted to congratulate you and say how proud I am of you for your weight lost journey that you've gone on. Okay, what made you decide to say, you know what, Lavell, this is enough?
You got to do this well, sitting on couches and worried about they gonna break get it, get in, getting in people called when you're a big brother, something go you hear people call act up.
They always want to blame it on you. And man, my car wasn't making that noise that you got in here. You're a lie. You're a lie I.
Mean getting on planes and they kicking you off because back in the day, southwegs you to kick you off.
When they you know, when you took up more than once.
Really, Oh man, I was on that one time man, and I had brought my chicken and then they said, sir, we're gonna have to remove you from this flight, but you're on a later flight because we ain't got no room. And I was just like, but I gotta get home. And I was trying to be nice, and they said, sir, you have to go. Oh she got real, beliitical, you have to go. You taking up space, And I said, and I looked at the people, and the people looked down like they made like I was a criminal or something. And I walked off the plane and I heard them applause like, thank god, you got it fan, And I said that that was one of them defining moments.
Man. But you know, I.
Didn't have no problem but being a big brother, because I you know, I had a lot of I empowered a lot of big brothers, just like because like when I was growing up, people empowered me with like the Fat Boys, Heavy D and the catch that Chuck Rock and you know when they guys came on, I loved him because because it's like Heavy D was fly, Yeah, he was smooth and all that. So you know, I saw I started embracing my bigness, you know, and then when I started racing it, the girls started liking.
Me a little more. They still like me for what I do for them, not for what I got.
But you know, but after a while, I didn't even see no problem with it because I was all healthy and cool, and they had no problem. When I started getting those things like high blood press dive beaties and stuff, I was like, man, I gotta do something because I was getting diata beats where I had sap coming out of my back. I said that I was recycling sugar. I was my own Willie Wonker factor.
You know what I'm saying.
I was.
I was getting I was out there bad.
And then I wanted to get the weight off surgery, but I was scared back then it wasn't ready. And then one of the one of these entertainers that I knew he had got it and died. I said, oh, I gotta go on and walk up these steps.
I got something. I got to eat a salad. I can't get test it.
But then later on my baby sister got it, and she beautiful today, Erica Crawford, Erica Roache. She married and she lost the way and she had the full deal. And I mean Erica and she being slim ever since. I mean looking going to me, she wasn't never hu monkeys, but she's bigger than what she was. But she like a supermodel now. She she makeing cake. She's a good person. She inspired me to do it, and I said, my baby sister did it.
She looking good.
So that's when I went under night and by that time they got it together. I had it right up here in La had the lazy surgery and I was sick of of getting sick from the diabetes and going to the hospital with that crap. And man, it was the best choice I ever made. You know, I feel better and this word I went on the two different journeys. Man, I was worth a big brother. And I made my fame. I made my salary salary with my calories. And then I flipped it on her and I slimmed down. People Like what you gonna do being you know, losing the weight, You're gonna be funny, like the fact was telling the jokes.
You know what I'm saying.
I mean because people, you know, they asked you that because you know, they felt more comfortable around you. But when you lose the weight, they ain't got no jit the they ain't got no jo didn't get off. Yeah, I know, you know what I'm saying. It's just like when you elevate yourself correct. You know what I'm saying, when you start, you know, like like you like how you change. You went from you know, being with Bayleys and you came and got your own show. People thought to you, oh man, you know a lot of brothers don't be able to reinvent themselves. And you did, you know, because I saw what I thought you gonna beat that way man up. I was like, oh shitty about the slash stuff. He took his glasses off. You look like a black superman. You took them up. I was like really, And he said, put your classes back off, And I said, sing gonna say, I mean, he ain't gonna never get a job game. But you handled that with class and distinction because he knew, he knew he was scared. He looks scared. I would have been scared too. I mean, you over that man and he took your glass off. Can you see without your class?
I can't.
Okay, I'm gonna make sure you know he did after you. But but but but how you change? And I'm a fighter so I said, man, I can make my.
Career anyway, because the funny comes.
From here, and I take that element away where people just gonna laugh at me being funny. That's how I changed, and I felt good about it. I felt better. I exercised. I had my son. I knew I wanted to play with him. I said, I can't be a fat dad and my son over there, and he wanted to go play catch and I had to throw it outside wait for him to bring it back, clutting my.
Toenails for me. Ain't boy, can you help me out? Son? Can't you get that baby toe?
You know?
Now I could come on toenails. I could go out and walk up steps. I used to look at steps and way it up. I said, y'all, sure, you ain't got no other route.
But now I feel.
Good and you know, and I you know, you know, and I eat what I want, but I eat right now. I don't eat too you know, over eating them right and food don't hold me balanced because I used to get bad service. I used to get bad service and I was like, man, he would root it hell in here. Yeah, give me the poor chop and the right even though they treated me like I'm still in that eating now. I walk out, Man, I don't need this food here. I can find a better place.
I was. It's reported. I don't know if it's true.
I think you said at one point your weight reached five hundred and fifty pounds.
How much did you have to lose in order to have the surgery?
Actually, I only had to lose forty pounds, man, because most of my weight was gristle.
Oh good. They was strange.
I was like, you really, doctor, it's all gristle, he said, man, strange enough, it's all gristle.
It ain't much fat.
It's just grizzle, you know. And I guess because I played football.
I was an active dude. I did jujitsue the whole nine. So I was doing I was active. I wasn't that boy.
So he said, if you can lose forty five pound, we could do it. And I love forty five pounds just rolling. I just sparred and I lost forty five pounds and I was ready for the surgery.
Right.
How did you determine what type of surgery? Did you research a lot of different type surgeries? Because you I think you had the band right now, I had to slide. I had to gas with sleep. You had to sleep.
Yeah, whar it cut out? You know cause you party, don't Yeah, part of your stomach. Size of the stomach. Now it is like a Twinkie.
You got us. I win up.
I can eat a box of twinks before now or one at the time, you know what I'm saying, maybe two, but now, you.
Know, basically cut it down.
And I mean cause your body can grow a stomach back, you know, really, yeah, that's what they told me.
They said, you can you can get it back, you know.
But I you know, I keep it in moderation and you and it's a good thing to know when you once you get it in your body, you get it in your mind because some people are eating this or to be in their brain, you know, like man, I'm gonna eat all these and sometimes you do. But you have to realize, Man, food ain't everything. It's good, you know, but I didn't have every food in the world. I didnet have everything. He ain't no big deal. And I always ate it when I depressed. But now I find other venues like fighting, going doing digit shoe I pay my son, I go on stage and talk about it, you know. So I had the gas the streamf It's a beauty. It's the best one to me. I don't want to get to the point where you had to take end zigmes. My baby sister had that one, and it was kind of hard because you had to get a her stomach real small, like an egg, and she had to take endsigns and it was kind of hard on her, you know, and it kind of really make you sick because you don't really want to mess with God playing right.
So another word, so what you do now? You could eat in your body. Your mind will tell your body, well, I'm full, whereas before you just ate eight eight. Even if your body says I'm full, Even if you might saying lavel you fool, You're like, no, I'm not.
Right now, I get finished this up. They had this thing.
I just seen this thing where they get like three hundred hamburgers and you eat them all you get a three thousand dollars check. I said, back in the day, I could have did that. I'd had my rent money. Man, I'll be here next month, workers out again. But yeah, back then, man, I could eat.
Man.
I would go to the wings stop and get fifty wings.
And now I got twenty five before I get to the house, and the twenty five just to help me get to the traffic.
Then I get home and I be mad because I.
Said, damn, I should get I we't got fifty wings and I only got twenty five when I got home.
I used to go to Maddonald and get riding fries.
I would give my fries for my meal, because you know, you ever get your fries for your burger, you would ate them up.
Get home. You ain't got no fries.
You need that riding fry you need because you kill them fries on the way home.
So you got to get it.
I say, give me two riding fries. Had two fries with my meal. You understand, hey man, you had to get again.
Well you were you were you a large kid. So you were large pretty much through your entire life. Of the child adolescents, young man.
I was a chunky kid. I went these kids. Now you see these kids. Now that's why they had to come up with the when they call the kids. But yeah, they got different kids.
Now you laughing a little bit, label you laughing, I'm real man. They said, you know you're a fat motherfucker.
You gotta kid a pill.
When you're a kid, you don't even want to run and play.
Look I was, I had a gut, that's all I had.
Nigga, I was active, man, I gotta be outside running all day, riding my bike.
You had to be whatn't it because you wanted to be You weren't going to side with Obama?
Well, no, I had to clean up the house. I had to clean up my mama like.
Dishy like, especially when a man come back. I can't get in the house. How long, mister Larry gonna be here? Take your chunk ass out there and play play kickbof they threw me out.
I'm too slow to run the basis.
But but I mean, yeah, back when I was growing up, kids was chunky.
But they wasn't like they are now. Yeah, I mean you know, I mean because they this is out.
But they were athletic. Did They played played dodgeball, they played kickball.
You gone you from Texas? For you from Georgia? Georgia? Okay, you know about Georgia kids. Okay, Georgia kids.
Black kid be big like he played basketball, he slim his head. But it'd be kids on that team wearing about two.
Hundred pounds in the seventh grade.
But they could jump right, chuck to dribble that ball past that pill, and they was active.
And I said, but I've seen fat kids like that. It wasn't you know.
They was chunky, but they could play and run. I remember a white boy named Dwayne, Dwayne Amley Yne Dwayne. He was the only white kid in a black neighborhood, and every black kid tried to beat him up for the racist and he was like the racism and punch attack dummy. We all every time we hate white people today, come in Dwayne.
And d Wayne learned how to run.
And when he was a chunky kid, but that something a bitch run like Hussein boat. You got three chunky niggas chase ther ass and he ran his ass off. And Dwayne could run. He was a fast white boy in the world. I'm surprised he ain't become a tracks dog.
Y'all chased right, because he would have won in the Lympics because it's mostly black track stars.
So they just seeing the white black boys chasing them. That all he needs. He'll running. He'll win the four hundred in world record.
But but uh, you know, chunky kids would just a lot healthier then. I think the diets and changes like my son. My wife is stickling all stuff. Man, We're gonna get raw foods and everything we get me right, because I mean, I don't know how your I've seen you eat eating down North Carolina.
Your ads are eating bad. I say, look at his muscle ass.
Out there eating fried chicken and yams and shit, and he got them damn muscles.
Whatever.
Nigga you probably do eat like that. You just blessed with that. I know niggas like you man just muscle for no damn reason. But don't help a nigga move though. You can't get Shannon to do.
Hey, man, he you have me? Hello, Hello, shending the hunk of the phone. Have you always been comfortable discussing your weight?
Was your weight ever a situation where you felt embarrassed, you felt a shame? Or you've always been open and felt comfortable discuss again?
I'm black, yeh, of course I was embarrassed in shame. But niggas don't care about your feeling. You got that old lady in church. Now you better slow down on that brigade. You better slow down, right, he gonna slow down. You're gonna you're gonna swell up. You're already big now, and I'd be like, fuck you, old lady wants to die. I mean while you're up on my weight, you know, and it'd be a first and night as fat as me trying to be a diet titchan.
See if I ate like you, I'd be big as here. I said, with you close.
You haven't watched the six hundred pound life first six hundred pound, but the other person by four twenty she be like, girl.
You need to get yourself together.
Bit you do too, you know, but just have to be that hate on fat on fat crime right for to me.
But you know, let me ask you. We're serious question.
I mean we drinking kangyak, you know, and you got this hot ass fireplace on how you how you comfortable in this hot ass fire place?
This ship? That drink one simple? This ship. I'm like, I'm in Africa. You wanted to turn it down, So turn this ship off.
I put a hot dog on that mother. I know it's I be honest, but then we don't need it.
Trying to.
I was like, man, that that's that thing on fire. Thank you, sir, thank you so much that that looks better. Yeah, cause that that heck won my ass. Let me drink this damn water. Yeah, we got just a water belger.
Oh that'll work that a big heaby. All right, thank you, sir, Go ahead with your cousins. I'm sorry. No, you Good's son.
Let me ask you this. You growing up, you heavy set chunky stocky.
Did kid?
Is that why you became a comedian is to get them kids up off you because if they laughing at somebody else, they're not laughing at lebo.
Well, yeah, because I think I had to use my words to launch on their ass because I could fight, but I couldn't fight fight because they get me on my back.
I'm like a turtle.
I couldn't get up keep on his back. He can't fight when he on his back. And I'm just like a damn turtle. I can't get on my back.
Then they got me. They got me.
That's why I learned jujitsu, So I learned how to fight on my back, you know, because I used to hate being on It was a nightmare. And I rested in high school all the way up to all the way up to college my first year, and but I hate it being on the back.
That's why we're winning because I didn't want to be on my back.
So but but then I but but a lot of times people would say stuff about me.
But I was always clever.
I was always always Because a lot of people talk about you, they think they had nothing wrong with him. But I see my boy Darrell, you know, back when we was kids, he used to talk call me fat, And I said, but look at you, man, your head crooked. I mean, you know you look you look like a premie baby.
You know what I'm saying.
I said, I said, I said he was a crack baby for a crack you know what I'm saying.
I mean, I used to find joke.
I told you, because you know, they could talk about my weight and I would make jokes about my own weight, so.
That take the power from there, and then I would launch on them.
Man. I mean, you know I was good to talk about people. Man, I talked about people. Ready, I had police wanted to arrest me because I'll be at the show talking about the ass so bad. The police was like, say another thing, nigga, you going down in the squad car.
I said, what you gonna file? Though, You're gonna file? He said, something about he said something about my outfit.
I was just saying, you know, I said, you had the gun in your pants, cause you're nothings that bigger than your gun, you know.
Said you look weird, nigga, you got the pants on.
Being a cop. You can't stop nobody gonna think you trying to rape them, you know, And he got mad at me.
Man. I kept going.
I said, you did drinking Covosi and a cop. You need to call an app on yourself. And he said, and one more joke, one more damn joke, and I'm taking your ad down. And he really had me outside ready the recipe, Yo, it's security can come and get him.
Man. I was killing that digga. If you look at it now.
Celebrities seemed to be okay with the weight loss drug Madonna or Zeppek.
You see they're having surgeries.
Are you ain't never heard of though? Really I heard of old Zimbi. I've just heard about this Dave pill. It's making people a little way like that. Yeah, it's it's supposed to be like for like a die. It's a shot.
It's a diabetes.
Yes, yes, so it's supposed to control your sugar level. So it burned the sugar out of you.
Well what it doesn't keeps it curves your appetite.
Yeah, but they say shit to curve your appetite, man, I can I can eat through a dyed pill.
I hurry, I get out of here, decks to trim.
I'm still kind of hume correct, you know, I mean it has to take little bites, but I mean it on like.
But it looked like Hollywood slimming down. I mean they swear by it. But yeah, but they look weird.
Though I seen them, I was saying, but die, they look like at that, like that Ethiopian head and that body looking no fence in Ethio.
But I don't want nobody but what we look like? You know what you look like?
You know it ain't no bad you look just beautiful women in Ethis. But but uh, but they look weird. They don't look healthy like you know, like they they the weight loss don't look normal. You gotta you know, but I think a lot of people don't know.
You lose weight. You gotta work out, y, look tone it up.
Yeah, yeah, it ain't gonna look good. You gotta figure it out, right. You know, you don't want to look weird and that because like I told people, I said, I look good, My chiding look good, you know, but you my underwear over my baby, but they pulled down.
Look like mail the carmel. You know what I'm saying.
I still gotta do a few sit ups. I got some sit ups and some get ups.
Right.
So when you you said you became depressed, so it was food always when you became depressed.
Was that your drug? Well, yeah, that was that was the drug.
But you never did like alcohol or any hard drugs. It was when you became the pressed.
You ate.
Well. I used to put cocaine on my chicken. I said, the crack in my meat a little bit, you know, but you know, the flavor got the cracked.
I mean I smoked weed, right, but I mean we was too depressed. All we did was make me make you more hoggy. Yeah, I go right back in. I smoked weed and get my food. And I was looking up. I'm backing the drive through again and said, the relief tings out of that.
Yes, you forgot to put another bag in.
It and two more riding fried but but uh but the uh, the uh, the the pressure thing. Yeah, I ate the food. I ate food because ship it was good. I mean you my mama. My mama cooked, you know, she cooked for an army. You know, I mean, and I mean, and I felt bad if you weren't eat it, you know, and black folks make you feel bad when you don't.
Finish your meal. You know what I'm saying.
Many children in other countries there with a lot of handing food, you wasting. I'm like, yes, ma'am, and I gon eat the food, eating the food the children. But sometimes though I was over my other grandmama house, she couldn't cook. And he say, you know the other kids in these other country and showed a little that that food.
I said, well mellow to him, because.
Said you ain't got no flavor, because like a white woman, don't fenish any white people in here.
It's some white people could cook. It's a rarity.
But you know, but white people don't believe in season like we do. Man, you see this rap. You see this a rap beef going on. They say, Drake gotta be bl.
No he don't because I'm not attracted to her.
I don't love if you got bblu like bbl all the mail now not at all.
I hate.
I thought you was. I thought you would be all you all natural, I'm very natural. I'm very I'm joking I would because it don't look right. I mean, it's just like Ozmpic die. The girls get the booty done, the titty dumb.
They don't have no money for the.
Legs, looking like a candy apple. They look bad, They look bad and they can't even stand right. You have to see a girl with the BBL booty, Hi girl, how you doing? They gotta keep leaning in the rocket because the booty too heavy. You know, the medicine ain't settled. You know it don't look right. I mean you know, ain't nobody. I'm gonna tell you. Women right now and nobody looking at you like that. You can have your old titty hanging down to your belly, but not and.
A man to be all over me. I mean, sagging titty.
You gonna throw a titty in the trash can. But man, I find a good titty tucking the trail again. Watched it all been sucking on since morning. Man, it ain't nobody throwing away you know, and me think that me and really you can have a flat booty your man to leave you with a bb L for a girl on the six hundred pounds life because she's stationary.
She always at home. She ain't never leave it. So let me ask you a question.
So you obviously you were a fast food guy, so you like something quick or did you cook?
Did you cook? Could actually actually let me get you, let me get there. Get this straight.
You don't know shit about me saying you don't talking about a fast food guy. Nigga, nigga, have cuisine. I'm gonna cook one cuisine. Nigga, nigga. I didn't get fat until I started making money. I was chunky before I started making when I started making real money.
When I was doing nigga, I was in rude Chris nigga.
When that steak sizzled with that butler on it, that deeplate, Oh my god, you hear that. I was like, I saved my grace before the food comes to the table. Look, I don't even know if I got enough money to pay for the food, but that's why I ate. And when I started they putting butter on steak, that's when I got fat.
You know, Matt Donalds and Burke King didn't do it.
But when I was up the rue, Chris rude, Chris Morton's Sullivans, all the fancy steak houses when they had like steak and lives. He get a surfing turf, get a lobby, antithate and you know, and then when you get your fame, you ain't got a paper nothing all the.
Time you all get mister grugg, would you like to try Hell? Yeah, I try shit. I mean a whole whole bull back, you know.
Than me and Adams had a Santa He's at his restaurant when I first did his first move.
He took me.
We had this restaurants right up off of Losyngega. I forgot the name it. They probably ain't there no more, but they had a time.
First time.
I had a Tomahawks Tomahawk yes thirty two, Yes, sir, we can cooking on this fire.
It was delicious. Man, it was a big ass. Think got long bone, all that long bone.
And I said, man, I loved the eat quality food. I love, I love good for I don't like restaurants for they go. We had some VISI sua and they give you this little bit the ass square with some sauce around it. I smack shit out, you bringing something that I'm gonna still be hungry after I lead there. But no, when they had a steak and it sizling, they had seeding and they brought fried rice with it, I was like, oh my god, this is great. And once I get that kind of food, I like quality food, fast food. It it kind of went down because it's a rush, you know what I'm saying.
And a lot of places that.
That are new, like the mom and pop fast food, Nah, I mess with them.
But you know, I'm too grown now. You know.
Back in when I was a kid, it was Matt Donald's every day. I used to go and I usually this is what I do with Matt Donalds in And this is a fat tip for any young fat brother out there starting.
You know, I used to go.
I used to get two double cheese and then a double a big Mac, right, and I take the take the middle mond off the big Mac and replace with the two double cheese burgers. And basically it was called the real Mac. It was called the Mac delicious, you understand. And I would knock that mug out, man, it was delicious.
Man.
They walk in and there, I was getting it so much that the people to drive through the usual mister and I felt fat as well.
And then and then I seen his fat brother behind me. Right, what you getting that? What you're stacking it?
Because he because when I you know that back of the day when they put the big mac in that the lood styphrone, jiggn swisch, you put the fries over here. But I had burger over there and fries over there, and I would stacked the fries in between the different burgers. And I was sitting up to eating my burger like that one time. See I'm a genius, okay when it comes down to food. And the big brother was looking at me, like, man, how you do that? And the manager put one of them. He put one of them on them in you one time, and they said. Some lady came in and de managed to take it down because her husband was eating them and he wound up going to.
The hospital with heart problems.
Said he a bitch, that's why he can't. He can't eat this man now, this man food. But yeah, but I I like frying. I like quality food.
But you know, we eat. We had a lot of comfort food.
I had to learn to enjoy it because I like good salads and stuff and quality stuff.
I go to a vegan restaurant and enjoy it and do what.
Vegan?
No, you don't eat vegan. I don't. He'll never have one. I've had it. I don't. I agree with you.
I ain't saying I was gonna turn you into a vegan because I hate mother.
Play with me with that ship you.
I go to vegan restaurant, I eat a salad, right, and don't you trick me with uh mock chicken tenders and make it they made out of tofu or jackfruit. Don't play with this lady. I watched this video.
This lady made vegan ox tails right.
What?
Oh my god, I was I can't, I can't. I was trying to cancel my Instagram page. Ni guy, I said this, this is demonic right here, cause most vegans don't believe in God. I'm gonna just tell you right there, you can't pray over let us lets is grass coyles. Don't even look happy eating it. I ate a hamburger in front of car one time, and you know what that guy did. He licked his lips like he wanted son. I said, nigga, that's cannibalisten. He kept looking at me like, bring my cousin over here. I would eat him in a minute. I said, I know you did this.
As you got older. Did the fat jokes bother me?
Because it seemed like you told the joke like I take a shower of my back still dry. So it's kind of like you're trying to take some of the toxicity out of the joke.
But did it ever bother you?
Because you're on stage and your your comedia, and so when you're on stage and you know you going there and.
People like man Labell said you you know what, you're fat ass down? You did that bother you? Well, if somebody said that to me, I roast the fuck out of it.
He shit yours down, your nasty ass, mama sucking dick for a living.
That's why I'm gonna ask you.
Some nigga called me one time, called me another professor. I said, you damn right, I'm another professor, and I gave your mama this dick and clumps the other night.
Hey, that that was that?
And see I meane and Alaba un.
Stage your monkey ass up there. If you want to, you're gonna go back in the box. I look at the nigga, I bring my lamd remember me on page.
I don't always bring it. I'm from Tech.
I live in Technic. We got hot ones down that for you. But I don't worry everybody. You know, they run on stage on people who they think they can run on stage. If they can get some fame off of me, off you, they'll run those stage if they if they if they think they can take you, they'll run those stays.
But you don't want to do that. I got a mic, I got a stool.
I gotta I gotta man, I put dude, don't do it.
If you that man, take your ass outside of cool off.
Now I had catch catch me off the stage and want to holler help me. I remember one of the time I was joking and I was said, Okra, California, and I said a joke about this cat and he was in the up in the balcony and I said, and I went, it wasn't even a bad joke. I said, this brother up they strong arm in the booty. He got this girl so skared, she said, can you rake me later?
You know? And I did a joke like the way she was looking and she he don't raped me.
She you know, a woman to get your ass well, he what you said that about my friend?
He gonna do it?
I said, I was just joking. So after the shoulder, brother's gonna say he gonna. I didn't know he was mad. Next thing, I walk down, what's your joke now, nigga?
And I ain't know this.
Nigga was tall as the building, right. I looked up and I have nothing to say. I had not to say, but at that time, I was like, dude, I said, you big.
I ain't scared of you being big.
I'm just scared that I'm gonna get some chargia because I had to fork in my hand.
I know how to eat with it. I know how to fucking nigga up with it.
You understand, he assume me for fighting him. You know what I'm saying and seeing that's the thing about it, You know, I don't. I don't put people in that position all the time to jump me. But if you say something to me, I have every right to say something back, right, But I don't. People people stay enamored by me. I'm I'm, I don't really have nobody. I come up and I make you laugh, and I don't. I don't pick you on you too much, you know, if you say something to me, I might mess with you. But I see if you're going through something, I can tell I got a good empathy on people.
If I see him going to I'll beating alone because it ain't worth it. I say, brother, you know I love you.
Man, go because it ain't not scared of you. I said, I ain't come here to start a fight. You understand, I ain't got nothing. And I'll be telling some of your comments. You ain't got to push it. You do already won.
You got the microphone.
You don't have to do that and any people paid to see you, and a lot of these people have insecurity now nowadays, Shannon, you know like you you know you your sister.
You want to beat Mike Epps says.
You remember that you had the motherfucker. I was like, damn, s what you gonna do the little mic You ain't had to be that. Damn man. You take that to take a joke, because see you that's what you were reaching that level of fame. You got your football fame. You're a Hall of fame. But but see this fame is totally different. Ain't different because you you out there, but you wanted it. Though I didn't.
I didn't.
I didn't see this level of fame coming level, and I thought.
That the fuck are you talking about?
No, not like hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, man, what the fuck while you do it?
Then?
No, But here's the thing, like you said, you look at my career in the NFL, and I won super Bowls.
I'm in the Hall of Fame.
But I'm ten times right now and I've been retired two decades.
What I was then, I didn't expect that.
When nigga, you had a hemmet on, nobod ain't know. Ain't nobody see your name on the back of your journey. You make a touchdown, good job, nigga, not go that do it enough time?
This is different.
It is your face out there, your mother's out there, and your outfit out there. Niggas gonna make jokes by and you ain't the worst time to be famous though, because niggas did the skins about the nigga didn't so many skins on your out you should, but you But the thing about what it does for you, You know what it does for you.
You you getting your ship is hot.
Everybody want to be on that, and you you have to find that you you you had coaches cuts you out. You went up against some of the biggest linebackers. This this, this is the same ship.
It's just that you don't it's it's different.
Nice words, and then some little pump joking about you niggas.
Look at my head, nigga. These niggas killed my head and.
I can't even I gotta put a hat on and do a video on in the ground cause nigga would hurt my feelings.
I was like, damn, my hand fucked up.
And I know, man fucked up with my son got my same head. When I cut his hair off, that nigga more hat for two years. Tell his hair grew bad.
I said, this niggas is not like his head, right. But I gradually I'm a man.
You know, I ain't gonna None of these clowns could reach the level that you. You metamorphosized your career in so many different levels.
It ain't even a joke they joke about. Yeah, nigga, but liquad I got bitch. You walk around you so rich. You got a little dog you carry with you. Nigga. You that's that's white rich.
But see here's the thing. It wasn't so much. The joke that he said is who said it? Like a lot of people say stuff, I ignore them. But see Mike, and see Mike ain't shit.
Mike a regular nigga. Mike.
I knew Mike when he had just got out the penotential man, Mike, Mike turned his life around.
He the same niggas shoes. Yeah, same niggas.
And we had that conversation when we were indy and I was glad we had a conversation. But you know what, Leville, I ain't look, I ain't, No, Lucker.
Said, I understand what I know, understand your feelings. Yes, no, I hey man, the.
Man head, you know, hot head, the hot head.
It goes without saying. I mean, you've been fighting all your life. Niggas say something that you ate nigga, but you jumping on me all the money you got. But the thing about it, when Mike ever said it, mother fugger watched you, it ain't They watched cat winging to go off on everybody, and you said there and ate all that shit up. But they talked about saying when they got mad at me, of course, niggas said you up there to that and them saying earthquake can't read.
I mean what I say.
I ain't gave him a script, so I don't know if he can or not. You just you just said interview over, I'm getting out here.
You just didn't like that. But you were sitting back saying, nigga, we about to get question quake.
First of all, quake my guy, like I said, I saw guys I know like I know, quake, Quake and I have conversation. I talked to quake quake and I've gone to dinner together. But a lot of the people that he mentioned, I felt that he was retorting what they said. Ricky said that he had the role of money Mike, and he was setting that straight. I asked, said, did you he's still the joke because that was reported saying said he didn't, and.
But the nigga had receipts. They showed the same joke. And this is the thing. This is a thing, man, this what this is.
In the defense, I said, he from my hometown, I love said, and uh, I mean, dude, you know, sometimes you do a joke and you feel it. I ain't never stole. No, I don't have to get no joke because my life is hilarious. I can write shit. I go up and talk about I elaborate on the comedian's joke that he did on stage. Like Chris Tucker was on stage last night at the Sandbag Show, and I said, boy, he didn't talk about he had to ride in the coach because he ain't got the money no more. He said he had his son pull out a knife and keep a safe back here.
He don't he was scared. And I said, I wish I could have went up behind her, because.
I would the roaded off that joke. I said, yeah, I was on that same plane with Chris Tucker. I was seen in first class. I got a lot of miles and I looked behind the curtain. I said, hey, kids, good to see you.
Nigga. I'm watching rush y'aller on the movie. Oh y'all don't get movies back there. But you did a real good job. And that the curtain. Let me eat nigga.
But but, but but comedy, it's not yours to own, it's yours to create. And sometime I had a white boy still a joke of mine. I don't even know who he is, and he I don't know who he is, and he know he got it from me because white comics, black comics, they see, they know me.
They I'm on everything. So when you watch my special my first vessel, Candle Brother gets some love. I did this joke about dude being my father. He was.
I found out it was my dad. He was he uh, And when I got to meet him, you know, I was like, damn. He was a professional bodybuilder.
I said, we got that.
And I like, you know, he built his body one way I build mine's Hamburg, you know. And then I said, but I seen the nigga that but Kina, I said, I don't know if me and my daddy dough, I'm got to do a blood cause I ain't got a lot of dick on him. I ain't inherit, none of that dick. I said, shit, I must take dick after my mama, you know. So so the white comedian did it. Then an NFL player did it. He did it on the joke show. He did the joke, and nigga never gave me no credit for the joke. You know. But I you know, even Tyler Perry did a joke that was of mine. He was at the airport, he was it was witness locate with his relocation with this program.
Whatever the movie he did, and I you know, he get mad whatever.
But I know he did it because he took the trailer off because somebody, you know, and it ain't he ain't no comedian comedian.
He's an actor, a writer, creator, He's very talent. I did a movie with him.
So but somebody probably wrote the joke because he was up there and they was in the lines of the airport and they said, ma'am, for security reason, you gotta take your shoes off. We got to check his shoes. He said, take my shoes out. He said, who gonna put him back on? That's my joke. I did that on my special, had my thirty minutes special on comedy. That's one of my main joke.
You know. I said, I ain't got no bombs made my shoes.
I said, if I had bombas in my shoes and hery as, I am, soon as I put him on, this ship is gonna explode, you know. And that's the joke, you know. So, but I mean when it comes down to that, you know, when Cat was jumping on, I said, NIGGI, you make.
A hundred thousand dollars a fucking show.
Motherfucker you worried about the puzzley ass joke you did back.
From comic View. I love Cat cat is. I I knew Kat when he was catting the hat and he we was in stocked and he may say he alive, but you know who I am.
I read her back before, right before you know, before wait, before you were faming. We were doing tours with Rick Sullivan help being u uh in Oakland.
We did all of uh what's what's it called up there?
We did, we did Stockton, we did uh all the all the north northern California joints and uh Freds know all that.
And you know, Cat was very talent. It was funny. You know, he was a good dude. He was always quiet, but he was funny. He did his thing.
But when he got on, when he blew up on that money Mike on Friday, I said that nigga about to be a superstar because that money Mike.
He and he embellished every character that some bitch to do. That's some bitch. He eats them characters up. Money Mike.
He eat it and he rolled, he turned it. And that's why you know Rudy Ray Moore told me something way back. He said, use what you got, your fat, tell about your fat, used everything you got. And Kat took that pimp roll and metamorphosized that some bitch into a career.
Remember he had to pimp out of the all that shit he made. He made, Yeah, pim Crownsey.
I mean he he made so much out of that it became he became the hottest, the most one of the most prevalles comedians in the world because he used it.
That's called milking your career. And what he did with that, you know, was powerful.
And then when he was on My Wife and Kid and he played he played uh, David Wayne's nemesis. Man, that dude funny. He's so talented and I think, you know, and then a painful thing. I think that he thinks that he's not he doesn't get all that he deserves. And he and I and I understand because how hard he goes and he is very smart and very talented, but we him relative enough of one little Joe cat.
I mean, uh, back then that.
You so if somebody still you, okay, if they still I'm not okay with you, okay, but what if they gave you credits.
A man, I took this joke from from l Yeah, that'd be great. And then make the check autter the ball.
You know, That's that's what you do, you you know, especially if you especially if you are famous, right, I mean, he if you blocking me and you getting all these opportunities like because you know prime example. Uh, everybody asked me about that mister Brown ship, right, Okay, that mister Brown shit that everybody look, that's already man, when you went up on mister Brown and David Man, he's a nice guy whatever, But Davy Man, he went, he tried to get me with that thing.
We wind up going toe to toe.
I said, nigga, I'm fat, but I got these jokes nigga, right, And I told him that he thought he could turn me up, I said, And I didn't kill him with some of the bruises I could have got him with. I said, nigga, how you calling me fat? Your old house is fat, nigga.
But I didn't do that. I didn't chance to ask something like that. But I could have really tore him up. But I just let him up just intellectually. Could it could? It could have been worse, yeah, and it was.
It was weird because I didn't want it to get weird with Steve Harvey's up, it was still a show and I ain't want to make it.
But I knew where I was. But Steve, you know, I always climb but late. But what where that all came from? We did? I was asked because I did to clean show. People don't know. I don't have to cut. We did it.
I did a show this weekend here Netflix called let There Be Laughs, you know, and Fred Hammond he hosted It is Everything with a nephew, Tommy, and I went up and did forty minutes live without even a cousin.
It was hilarious.
The people laughed so hard, game and standing ovateer. But I be I can probably go to the church circuit and probably be just as famous I am over here. So but I just you know, I mean, God guide me where you want me to. But so anyway, so I did this mega fest for TD Jakes.
No did he did there? Come on? Cop hold the veil?
No?
No, No.
Only reason I said did he wasn't there? Then the veil? Man? I mean, man, we're gonna swallow that move on. No, didn I didn't get that.
You might need to pull you one to No, that's the symptoms of that.
Come yeah, that slipped out. I work.
My brain was like, no, don't do it. My tongue said, funk that we're gonna do that. But we was at the megafare. I this was the second time I did it. David Man was don you may not admit this. You know black people, I am.
He did this joke.
It was so similar to this joke that I did on Laughing for Looser. It was just it was pretty much the same joke, right. I mean, it's a couple of people do it. You know, I ain't gonna put him out there, but they know who they are and they do the joke. It is my joke, and I did it on laugh of Looser. It got a big standing over talking about you know, I said, I went over my white friend Jeffrey House, and Jeffrey you know, it's a different world over at Jeffrey House because we said, hey, well well come on in, man, we're gonna go there to play with somebody toy you know like that. I used to go over his house because he was the child and he used toy. Hey, you know, his mama buy him every joy. He had the g G I Joe with the konfoud gever. You had a six million dollars man. You can remember the man when you look behind it the head and you had buying a vision. He had even Nieva. He had all the games. And I used to go over there and play with something when he wasn't looking. Still a couple take him on. So so I went over there, and I went over this house and we were going upstairs. Say come on to vet us go upstairs before he can get upstairs, you know, you know, I said. His mother said, wait right there, messr you hold it. Wait there, don't you move another muscle. You don't you go up that stair. You need to clean your room. You're you're not gonna have company. You mightn't clean your room. You need to clean your room pronto. And I was like, oh shit, I said, white mama, just like black mama. They don't play, you know like that, you know. But Jeffrey looked at his mom and looked at me, moved me out the way and stepped up on his mama like Clint east Wood and saying, look here, lady, I have company and we're going upstairs and have a good time playing with somebody toy.
Some of them are missing. I think Levell took some. But I'm not gonna say anything. And we're gonna have a great time. And I'll clear my room and I ready, and you bring up some cookies, some of them lemonade pronto, you know like that. And I was like, oh, I said, I said, I'm finna go. You're about to die.
I said, run, run, run, And all this mother did was go what And she went and she just ran in the kitchen, didn't do nothing to them.
And I said, holy shit, I said. I said, hold on, man, I said, I said, hold on, Jeffrey. Now you sit up there and talk to your mom. Your mama about to kill you. You better get to hell out, he said, little Vell. Look here one thing I've learned in the eight years of my life on this earth.
I've learned that if you stand your ground, you talk to your mother like an adult, she has no other way but to treat you like adult.
I said, I hear you, Jeffrey.
But your mama writing in there loading her clip right now, she about to put it put ten in your ass right now. I said, no, no, I guarantee you look your mother in the line and stand your ground. She has nothing else but to respect you.
And I say, test you lie.
Before I can say another word, his mother came up there with cookies in lemonade, said, you guys have a good time.
I said, God, damn you try. I said, yeah, I said, Jeffrey, I can'tnot stay.
I'm gonna take my cookies and my lemonade and some of your toys and to go cause I got to get home and inform my mom up the new room. So I got home and I'm ready to I drank my cook eliminating ain't my cooking.
I got to that screen door, I kicked it over.
My mama looked at me and said, I don't know what's wrong with your foot, but you better keep it off my screen door.
And I just looked at it like this. He said, boy, I.
Don't know what you you're playing too much, but you know that trashman waiting on you to take out to the dumpster.
Now gonna take that trass out. I said, oh shit, hear my moment, my moment.
And then I said, I said, I said, you remember everything, Jeffery saying.
I said, look here, lady, I said, you're a cure.
Lady right now, I said, I told her, I said, I said, right now, I'm going upstairs.
They player was on my toy, did I know from Jeffery House? And I'm gonna have a good time. And I want you to tell you right now, lady.
And then and before I can say another thing, I thought I was still talking. I was in the hospital like like three months. I had to shoe up my asss.
Down there killed me. I got a hospital. I was nineteen.
She came to the hospital. I thought she was feeling bad. She said that trash still waiting on you. Okay, So that that was the joke. That was a joke that I ended up on the lap of loser and everybody ran with that. Mother buy because see, I write, man, I can come over, I come up with stuff all the time.
I can go on stay and talk about this old interview that later on the night. To ask your question, do you write all your stuff or do you have ghostwriters? I'm believing only got I believe in is holygo.
I ain't ain't ain't so you had nobody's ever wrote any material for them?
I mean, dude, have you wrote for other people? Yes?
I have Rod for other people I've gave you know, I mean, I've helped comedians elaborate on their jokes and everything I give.
I give taglines to all my felt me. I don't charge them.
I see if I see something funny. You know, that's what you do in the community of comedy. You give somebody ideas that they could work. And they was like, like, my I got young guy Isaiah Kelly. You met Isaiah because he came up in front of you not bringing me on the show. He said, you said you're gonna be on the show Tuesday.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So that's my man and I And when I see something that will work for him, our add to it. You know, it's material. And yeah, I write all the time.
I write.
I write jokes all the time for people. And I mean, I would love to be a comedy writer because I come up with some great.
Ideas, but you have to have See. I don't like writing for.
People because my mind it's different. It's on another level. Okay, I don't. I don't write.
See, I ain't afraid to say shit about my insecurity.
Anything I talked about my dig ain't big. I talked about all these things about myself. I said like I did a joke. I said, dann a lockdown, I ain't ash to do. And my dog kept coming around licking his ball, and it was, you know, every day, be in front of me licking his ball. It was so disrespectful. But after a while I started getting chained by it. I was like, man, just your balls can't taste that damn good. And then I finally snapped said, get your gay as out of here, look at your ball, get your hands out of get your ass out of here.
Look your ball.
And the dog got up slowly and looked at me like to say, hey, he And he was right, because if I can flick.
My own ball, the interview wouldn't be going on right now. I wouldn't even be married. But that's the jokes that I come up with. I go there because you tell jokes like I.
Don't know if you saw the Tom Brady roast. That's old school, but they nothing is off the table. If you actually were to tell jokes like that with out that situation, I don't know how you survive.
Because they're talking about I'm still here, nigga. I'm saying I'm still here. You tell Joe like that, man, I go, I go where I go. I don't beat up people's sexual presence like that whole I don't have to.
But funny shit, real shit, Yes, that's funny. Comedy supposed to be taboo. It ain't supposed to. It ain't fun.
It's supposed to be nice. Yeah. I mean you don't go watch no comedian to just talk about.
I was at a birthday party and my kids. He fell down the staff throatboy boom, ain't noy fucking listening to you. I mean, you come up there and you say some shit that nobody else say. I got like I was in the little ride and I got those days and I kept it real. I was like, well, damn, I said, we can did this show in my hotel? Ticket sales is harboring and something. Bitch, I feel so unsuccessful. Nobody came up there and said that shit. And I said, damn. I said, cut you out. Told one person you know, and I can. And the way I said, I shared it. I said, no, don't be leaving early, like you gotta get to your park, your car, your park, car park roped out front.
It ain't nothing about five yard in arena.
Why we do this damn show I said, let me keep my eye on the promoter because I don't know my money here, you.
Know, and I you know, but I'm a kind of guy. I just let it fly.
And sometimes if you confidence in what you say, it's just like talking to a girl, you know, talking to a lady.
If you say it and you're looking.
At you, damn right, ain't nobody can jump on it, you know, Ain't nobody can say something to you. It's just like it's a that's the rhythm that you had to jump on, you know, And I don't. I said, when they told oh, you're gonna be through, I'm like, man, you need to get your punk ass out of here. You know. You shouldn't come to a show ready to be offended, right, You shouldn't come to show and worry about being offended.
Yeah, if you go to a comedy show, you should be expected. You should expect.
I mean the greatest comedians in the world that I love, like Richard Prior, he told he he shared his life, but he go hard. Robin Harris, he talk about it rather that Harty, he go hard. I love people that don't don't they go past the line? Robert Shimo. I mean people that that people don't even look at and be like incredible. I mean this, you got Tony henscliff, he was on that roach. That Tony here the cliff and here gay dude, and Tony would go hard. Tony goes so hard. But what I like about Tony he got a thick ass skin, you know. He and David Lucas a funny young come of coming up. He be going at him with gay jokes, and he be going top with toe and he don't care. But that's how the world should be.
Man.
People don't have their opinion. Even if they don't, can't saying, they gonna still judge you. It's just like I tell you, I said you you man, you can do them. Them people pick on your ass, and sometimes you should do it. What you what you kill him with is laughing and some of that ship because you be like, yeah, whatever, nigga, I look good and my ship, you know. And and the funny thing about it, I mean even if if these guys like like I was gonna say what Mike Heller was joking about? That mean Mike Ella was watching your ship. That's a cool thing. Motherfucker's watching you now watch you? You know, because you on TV. Something has to make them want to watch you. And like everybody said, like I even said, I wish that Nigga Cat would have said something about me so I could sell some ticket.
Said everybody to say something about it. Yeah, I mean man.
After a while, because people was like, wow, ain't nobody retaliating? I said, why it's made them famous. Michael Blacks ain't never been that damn face. He ain't roll up new joke, sit seventy three seew you see dow. He gonna come at me cause you said that on my platform. I told him that, don't give a fucking He said, that's my I'm cool with Michael back.
Say he don't. He don't like because I go up Joan we joon we talk about. I mean, dude, But why they get upset at me? Though? I don't know? Do you think they get us? You afraid of Michael Black? Nothing man stopped. Come on, lun you you ain't never no. But I'm saying they were upset at me. He's araid, you're gonna hit you with a blow, darkness, come in here with a spear and the bone and no goa.
Let them talk about people that Nigga ain't even hold Africa. That nigga been in Philly.
Most of his life. That mother fucking changed his accidents so damn fast.
He's worked for us Air when it was us er. Mike perpetrated that Nigga scared of elephants. He just went back to Africa. They ain't even recognize him, was his Nigga.
I mean he's my he's my friend. But I joke about it.
I mean, he better. We've been around for years. I mean if Mike one of them guys that he take it on the chin, you know, you look at this, his paid people be killing him and uh, but he eat it up.
You know, he is smart enough to know. That's how you know.
That's why I respect him, because he's still out here eat right, because he take it and go and get it. He don't let nobody hold you back because the people and some people don't talk about I don't even like talk about none of the other community. They don't never say shit about me. And you know who the fuck I am. Everybody ain't his mother gang know who the fuck I am. But they be trying to play like that. Man.
You can't deny I'm undeniable right, and I ain't talking.
Like Ricky Gay you love Ricky say, man, they tried to get me to follow the bell man.
Ricky smiling like as nigga, that nigga ain't shit, always throwing his life in my face. Ricky, you need to come out on my boat. Fun your boat, nigga, you know, throw your little pussy ass boat in my life. You know he always wanted to come out like I don't want to be on overnig boat. Hold me out there then I'm working for you, hey, man, get that tie that rope off.
I'm like, don't work.
You ain't a ball of snacks. You out here now, I can't get back, and I don't swim good. I got float good, but I don't swim good.
You mentioned that you did something with Steve Harvey, and Steve told the joke about he can finally and break you can put his arms all the way around you. What's your working relationship because a lot of comedians have had great relationships with Steve.
How he's helped them?
Earthquake told me how he's helped them, said the entertained and told me how he's helped them.
Rickie smileys told me how he's helped them.
A lot of guys that Steve has given info to give given a little tricks of the trade or how to become more successful in the game.
What's your relationship like with Steve?
Yeah, me and Steve got a knife fight in an alley about ten years ago.
I cut him.
I cut him deep, cut him deep, right around the time muscles, right around the time Muscle.
Stabbed that nigga. It was over dice game. I'm just playing. You got quiet? Hey, No, I mean, let me tell you. Let me say this.
You know I give Steve it flowers flowers for allowing me. He allowed me the maximum he could give a funny guy. See when you funny, mother gonna give you opportunities, right and if you see I thought, see I got the game all wrong. Like you catch the ball in football, you make a touchdown, you become a Hall of Famer. Right you catch it, you can do all the yards you play, y'all win championship. If you get a ring comedy, ain't that comedy? You could be a funny in the movie. You can't get no more movie because she's too funny. Because the motherfucker that they think.
Yeah, you know comedy.
You unless you selling the tickets, you're gonna get shunned away. And see, I have to force myself in and start selling some tickets because the people love me. But it's sometime if you don't have the power the machine behind you. Yeah yeah, yeah, they don't know you there. You know. So when Steve gave me, gave me opportunity to come on the hoodie was and I and see you could that one thing about it if you let me in some shity, you'll turn that van on me.
The fireway to steal how is It's got a lot of insulation in it.
Damn.
But but but but when you uh when when when?
Uh?
You know, when you and I get an opportunity, I eat it up. I don't be playing with it. I tell people, I said, God, when God.
Let you in, you go in like a virus. You catch you, you catch on like bacteria.
You you spread your ship around and tell it's over because you know you don't know when you're gonna get it again.
It's just like my wife, a beautiful woman, she liked me.
I married her ass so no other nigga can get him, I said, I said, I'll be all over.
I put a baby in the averytain, so ain't no nigga to ever get it. He can't never leave me.
And I spoiled the funk out of us, So she give it another nigga. He's gonna have to step it up.
He's gonna have to do all the shit out that I can't.
I don't even got no bank account money because I'm taking care of my wife. I make sure I business I took care of. I do all I can for because I love her first of all. But I mean, when people bless you, you take advantage of they blessing. If that's what Steve.
He put me on that Hillie Award.
And at first they would never show all the shit I do because if they showed all the shit. One time a person had a video their camera phone and I was and they didn't they cut out all. They'll cut it down because they have to. They be trying to edit and made you fit it in. Well, who are you selling it to? You ain't sell it nobody, by the fuck. You don't let it play.
You understand what I'm saying.
So, but but if somebody put it on the video, they take it on the jumbo try and people that Mother got like about two three million views of me just going going, And so when I came back and started doing it, I started taking over the mug. I saw every time I did the Hoodie Wards, I would just have fun. And Steve says allowed me to be blessed off that he put me on this radio show and I got to do it.
He tried it. I was trying to do it, you know, but I do things my way. I'm a problem child. I ain't never been. It's like they love me, but I go so hard.
They don't know how to take me, you know, you know, like you know, but when I get opportunities and he helped me a lot.
Only time he hurt my feeling is when he ain't put me in thinking like a man.
You know.
I was like, man, I thought I was gonna get any one of this movie. I ain't get in one or two.
All these comedians in the Mother, Hey put me in there. He gonna put Bruce, Bruce, anybody and put he Canna put us in there. His brothers attacking the food store, you know what I'm saying. I was just like, I was like, why, why, why the I didn't get that opportunity, but I couldn't hold that to regard because he let me in.
But one time he did let me in one time, and and.
And I right fucked up, fucked up the tour because I couldn't do no more shows because we was in Philadelphia at the Black.
Of Course Theater, right, and.
I went on before him, right, and I went up in that bitch and I tore a hole in that something bit. I knew he heard the crowd because he was getting his mustache trimp. He came out the back, but the knack and still tide a round neck like the fuck that nigga.
Do you know what I'm saying? He wouldn't, he wouldn't expect it like that.
But but if you don't watch your competition, you don't understand that their competition can be.
A bad Sometimes it's our best be gonna laugh. You follow one of them heavy hittles, well.
I mean, if you don't understand that you're a heavy hitter, you know, because I got they don't let me up, they don't allow me to go first.
I can't go further. I mean, they let me go first, and then I fuck it up.
I fuck it up, and I blew it and then everybody after me the show go down because I ain't sitting up there saying I'm the bad nigga in it. But I'm one of them, and I come up to and I'm these opportunities. You don't get up here and play with it, right, you understand and you know. And I'm always reinventing my comedy. I write and write and if it don't work, nigga, I'm talking about ship that I see. I'm I'm come stuff on the fly just to get these people going and to loving me. I don't commonly is a wonderful open It's a beautiful thing that we don't we try to put in a box. It's not a it's not a box gift. You're supposed to exploit it. And what I'm seeing a lot of these people that do these skits on on Instagram and stuff. They don't know that the boundaries are being funny. You can fucking talk about you and anybody else. I mess with your ass the whole time I been here. But I ain't offended you. You know, I fuck with you and I'm gonna fuck with you. I fuck with your ass bad. Let me tell you that Michael Jordan's I talked about Michael Jordan playing baseball. He was at It was at Arooine Walker's uh uh thing he have every year in Chicago, and he was playing baseball. I was saying, yeah, niggas out her kissing his ass because he's a legend. He a legend in basketball, he ain't a legend. And softball, they kept on rolling the ball. They let him get a home run just because he was Michael joy I said, man, try that nigga out man, he ain't that damn good. He got mad with me, I said, I said, he can't even hit the ball.
I was giving him the business. And after after the game, I went up and asked for a picture, and I ain't know. He took your heart. He took his heart, I said, he said, I said, miss George, can I get a picture? He said, he gravitated, nigga, Let me tell you something, take a picture with you, but you better stop talking about And after that, the.
Whole weekend that nigga maybe me come over and hang out with He gave me some guns and everything, he said, and Charle's open.
He fell in love. Yeah said he loved it.
He said, he talked about out here. And it was one of those things where that's how I am as a person. If I get opportunities, I'm having fun with it.
And I don't. I don't.
I don't get that. Like I think, I'm a big guy. Big guys, you know, you know, being a big guy, we can't always get in where little Kevin harkn get in because he don't look as dangerous as something.
You know, big guy like me.
My voice is strong, they might not let me in. I'm a big guy, but I'm I'm a humble guy. But but they don't look at me like that.
That's why people say I'm underrated. It's not that underrated.
They keep me off because sometimes they don't know how to take me or they fear me.
And I mean, and that's on you. I mean, dude, it's okay. But let me just go back to Ricky Smiley.
Fuck Ricky Smile. But I'm gonna tell you something. Let me tell you something about Ricky. Me and Ricky been boys said before, you know, before he had his millions and I had my money, and uh and I remember one time I was at Oklahoma, Oklahoma City, the mill of Time got risk and soul.
He had booked this show. It was me and him. I don't think whole flood was on the show whatever. I forgot who it was.
But we doing these clubs that this dude had us running around doing the club and then wind up saying they ain't make no money.
So they indeed email the town just pissed. You know some comedians, you know the little guy, He motherfucker had us all the time.
They can't pay us, you know like that. I said, oh, they ain't paying us. That's one thing. Back when I was younger, I was motherfucker man, I was something else. And this comedy game, I don't eveny nothing because I used to be a bouncer.
I used to be a nigga. Get it done.
So I went in there and saying, hey, man, so where's our money because I know I owe you owe me about fifteen hundred dollars. He said, man, we ain't got your fifteen hundred dollars. This brother, this brother said this shit, he talking, she talking strong. And I said, I said, when when you're gonna get it to me? You want to write out of chair. He said, nigga, I ain't got your money.
He did it like this.
Wow, we upstairs and there's a pool table there, right, So the nigga said, I said, well, what you got?
He gonna throw like two hundred dollars hit me in the face.
Before I knew it, I had the Q stick broke that mug over that nigga nick and he was knocked out. And I tiptoed out of there, and I said, oh, I might have killed that nigga, right, And first of all, this is past the statutes of invitation, so I can tell this story. Yeah, I got the money. I took a little too her allowed. But we in our room and I'm sitting up there kind of shaking because you know, I ain't know what's gonna happen. So all of a sudden, later on they called his boy called us, and he can't call looking for us. I said, man, I ain't going down there, and they adn't demeans. I didn't know why I wouldn't go down there. He was said, man, he needed something. He's gonna talk to them. He probably got the money. He wanted to take us to lunch. He feel bad. So I said, okay, I.
Know what this ship is he trying to?
You know, he really wanted to see me, but he couldn't do nothing because they had already came downstairs, so he went down there to be enforced her.
I guess he was his boy, you know, and he probably probably wanted to shoot me whatever, you know.
So we go to village inn over there, and we all over there and I'm just get comfortable, man, and we just joking and laughing.
You know, I'm you know, I'm me. I'm bring me all day. You know, I'm cracking joke. And he gonna say, you know, you.
Ain't no convenient You just make up stuff off, talking out, you know, just making jokes about stuff coming out the top of your head.
I said, well, dumb ass, that's what a comedian is, your dumb motherfucker. So he said what I said, that's what it is. He said, Nigga, I want to fuck your ass up, but you did to my boy.
He talking all his shit and I wasn't paying no attention, and the militized him just sitting back like what's going on?
And I grabbed Nigga.
Said boom, hit his face on the table and then motherfucker rolled over off the table.
He had chilli on his face. Next thing, you know, I didn't see.
The police behind us. They were sitting right there at the other booth. Sir, put the hands be on your back. I don't know what's going on, nigga. I'm sitting there in the hole the seale, and that's when my bitch came out.
You know, I ain't no games to nigga. You know, I just pro fight her. I ain't gonna let you jump me.
Because when he kind got up, I kind of figured he was gonna try tom. Yeah, so I protect myself. But look, I'm sitting the hid saying crying. I was like, I was like, man, just call don't call my mama, but just tell I'm all right. And I was scared to death with my phone. My cell phone rang and I thank god for Sprint that day because sprint usually dropped.
Cold, you know.
And uh uh And it was Ricky Smiley and they seen it. Rieky's Miney, you know, Ricky Smiley, so that you know he had got a name down there. And he said, yeah, Reeky Smile, Ricus Smiley, keep calling you. And I was say, oh, man, and he said, man, we ain't really see what happened. The police just brought it then because they thought, y'all just disrupted the peak. We can let you out of here if you're gonna con down, says you know Ricus Smiley, I said, And he said he could vouce for me that I'm a good person, right because he didn't know where I was. So so Rex's mind said, man, if you if I, if I buy your ticket to come to Birmingham, he can make this fifteen.
Hundred dollars you know you comes Nigga Hell.
Yeah, right, And Rigus Roley flew me down there and it wasn't even a sow Andiz show.
Ricky paid me fifteen hundred dollars to come down that do It show. And I appreciated rigors by.
I got my fifteen hundred dollars that I lost down there. I got it there one night, right one show.
And I always love that dude for that. I always love that dude for that.
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How did you find your wife. Because you're famous, you find people know your face.
Like you said, there's a difference between me being being a football player where a helmet were in a uniform and people seeing my face on digital or linear television, they see your face.
Imagine is that you faindue all the nasty as parties you've went to. I go to no party. Ain't no party. Damn that shit is yall boy? Come on, but I ain't no party. You ain't gonna no booty party.
My brother he played for the Falcons for about about about about about a year and a half, and he told me about parties he got to go to. He got a new life, and after he started talking, funked up to me with his light's getting women. So I know you went to ain't you ain't gonna no party.
No, I ain't no party. I'm a home body. Okay, I hear.
You can put everybody else dirty linesry out here. I ain't put nobody your answer. Try to tell if you ain't gonna no part, I ain't going to no party. But see me, this is a difference. You see her mother bound football player, You got rings and ship white girls on your ankles.
I know you had about no I know yet you can that's your question. Label. Hey, hey, white dude, do you think he has some white women? See? Thank you you had the white white people think only day white women. I ain't say you're only day white women.
But white women come and clutch onto a muscle bound nigga with a career, and it ain't no judgment either.
They can't go out. They seen you the gold Man. But I ain't always. I ain't always have muscles though, but.
A nigga, you had athleticism. Man, You've always been a big nigga, even the biggest guy. Damn tight end and then the game I've always been.
I know you.
You're born like that nigga. Niggas in Georgia come right out the dirt like.
Everybody.
Babies come out with muscles in Georgia. How did you know your wife was the one? When you're better?
So weird you ask that question. I was in Georgia, you know, and they had you remember the brown or Brother hair Show? Yes, I do, Yeah, I was down there doing the show for the Browner Brother Hair Show.
Now I was the feature comedian they had like Rob Man, Uh, you know.
Pat Brown. They had all these comedian on the show. Damon Williams if we was all on the show. But the lady come up to me saying, I'm paying you the most money, you better keep it clean.
And I was just like, what keep it clean? Everybody going because ride man up there talking about washing your coochie and all. And then she telling me to keep it clean. And I was like, why do this? Nay being mean to me? So I said, okay, I can do clean. But she had so many comedians on the show.
By the time I got up, people were walking out on me, walking out him, and I was just like, oh man, I'm eating it. I'm eating it, you know. But I didn't know it was one o'clock in the morning. Being a comedian, I ain't giving shit. I see a crowd out there at one o'clock in the morning, I don't care. So whatever the case may be, I got done with the show.
And I was like, man, getting the fuck out of here. You know, I'm mad and shit you ever seeing.
A Purple Rain performed and he thought he did bad and he started turning up the room and they said, Prince say love you, you know like that.
He was like two hundred people wanted to see me out there.
So I go back out there and this one woman, she she had a blue jean, blue jean jacket, that's why I call the blue jeans.
She had blue jean pants. She had her hair tied over the side, and she was.
Just hanging out and she came up. She said, I want to picture with her, And she said, I want to picture with you. Can I get a picture? I said sure, And she whispered in my ear talking about where you staying at? And I was like, slow down, girl, I was saying, yeah, look, I ain't even I said, I told her though I told her.
I told her, I said that the holidays.
I ain't telling her my room, just in case she was a serial killer, you know. But the strange enough, she was staying me and Tony Roberts. We was we went over to eat at the Dennis at the day's end where she was staying there. She wound up lying and saying and she was my wife, and she needed to leave me a message on my hotel phone, so, you know, speaking things that existed. We started talking and man, we'll be on the phone for hours all the time. And man, we had always topsy turvy you know.
But you know she was beautiful.
Man.
When I saw man, she was gorgeous, and I was just I couldn't believe she really wanted to be man because I was five fifty.
Then you understand. Yeah, but I was flying though, nigga, Yeah wow, we go wild. You see that wow ship. That wasn't too much wild for that wow wow. But I was flying. I had on my letter trench jacket, and I had my had on, had my listen. Yes, nigga, keep myself common stop. It might have been just one fat cat, but but I got it there. I got it in uh Sacramento, and it was like the big and tall.
You know, you go to be in tall the right time, in places where it's warm, you can find the best all the best letter they had, the best player had a California big and tall up there. I used to come to California for that only they had all the ship. But anyway, so we just started talking every day.
Man.
We had our ups and downs and all that stuff. But she was just in my life.
And you know the thing about it was, this woman got in my life. She made me better because she made me be accountable for everything. She put my son into where I had two kids. She had two kids when I met her, and they were great kids. They fell in love with me. We had a we had a down point, but I knew once I was on last time I'm standing after, I was gonna blow up.
But I wasn't feeling I felt empty.
If I blow up and don't have nobody and shit share it with because you know, that's when you you can be single all the way up to when you start making it.
When you start making you need to find that. Yeah, you need to find it. And uh and and I realized I made up with her. We worked it out. We had some we had some trials, trust me, and marriage.
Ain't always easy, but I ain't easy to get along with, and I sure she ain't able. We worked it out and we made a beautiful thing, made some beautiful kids. We fell in love. And man, since I've been with my wife, I've advanced more. I slimmed down. Were on property, we on businesses. We you know, we we just graduating the bigger and better things.
Every day. She makes me better, I make her better. So that would that have been possible without her in your life?
Do you think you could have been where you are now without her by your side, without her supporting you and giving you off of you and encouragement, because, like you said, achieving all these things a single is one thing, but once you get to a certain level, you want someone to come home to and share that with.
Right, I think it still might have been attainable, but it would, but I don't think. And the thing about it, I don't think.
I think I I messed up a lot with the money. You know, I hustled. All I knew was hustle hard. I didn't know how.
People get mad at Donald Trump from knowing how to get out his tax See all taxes I knew was h R block And I didn't even if my mama took one she learned she took one class, and she thought she was a tax advisor, and she would give me bad advice.
So I didn't know how to put my money right.
When you start making real money, that one thing puff Daddy said, there's more money. More problem is that you're gonna you gotta learn how to put your mind manager. And I mean God blessed me always to get money. I mean I always had money, but it's like you got to atone for your money. In America, and uh so with her we started. She told me put everybody on payroll. She told me, I put her on payroll. We was able to get houses because when your credit good, but you got our is problem.
You can't get housing. We built. We build all this together, man, and it's just getting better and better every day. I got. My children are good.
My son went from regular school to private school. Like you know, life is good with her.
It's it's better.
We eat better, you know, I because I think I'll probably be there to heart attack right by now. Because I was gonna eat something with cheese on it. I sure gonna stay with some fried food.
I gave up pork. I gave her all that. You give a port, I been gave a I Ben gave him for me too. I gave a port.
I don't eat nothing, you know, nothing but pork in it like port chop port layin Okay. But you know you eat ham point, pepperoni, ham, bacon. Yeah, you don't start with pork. I know now that's a that's that's a black answer right there, because now you know bacon made a port. I ain't know that I'm the only port chop port lord.
But you know my my white grandmama. Right when you were down there, you know, she had fixed some food right, and it was like chimes. I said, man, I'm sorry, I don't eat poor.
She said, you don't eat pump. Yeah, yeah, that's something that's interesting. So y'all don't eat por Do you eat hamd?
No?
Man? And she looking, she got mad at me, like pork ain't no hand. It was a pork, but that's what. But what did I hamburger? What els me? I'm now you're confused with me? Now? Then we went all into it, but it was you know, yeah, I gave it up a long time ago.
Man. And uh I once I found out, I would like to give a meat, but I can you know, I can I go without it.
I didn't fast me and a big brother. Then you asked me about it.
I didn't fast it twenty five days, no food, just liquids for twenty five days, two times, three times.
I didn't eat nothing, and I you know, and I felt good though my head was clear. Everything it was different.
But now since I had to wait, I was I can't do it like I used to, you know, like because it's like, man, you know, I don't.
Have but a third of my stomach where I got to eat, eat nothing. But sometimes if you notice, when you're sick, are you.
Going through something and you can't eat your body healing, So sometimes you gotta let your body heal, and sometimes you don't eat to heal because sometimes your body over here eating this trying to break this down to get this out of you. It can't come over here and fight this over here. So that's where a lot of people getting getting their problems with.
Yeah, I give up port, so like one weekend out the month and two weeks out of the year, I don't eat no pork.
You ain't no port. What you eat then chicken? Okay? Chicken and turkey okay. I mean, you know it's not what she is? How you?
How you?
Because meat wasn't never in the Bible, they said your meat would be nuts and and berries and fruit.
It was really supposed to be.
Meat, but we had the minion over every everything. So you know, I just pray it with it in Jesus, and I said, I love meat because it be so delictent the way.
You can do it now. And then her I got two of them.
The duels to this concludes The first half of my conversation Part two is also posted and you can access it to whichever podcast platform you just listen to part one on. Just simply go back to club Shay profile and I'll see you there