We're here! I apologize for our recent absence. Everyone freaks out and sends you home if you try and come to work sick these days. Plus, Slim needed some time off because he wanted to chase down some Marketplace deals that were a little too good to be true. *How old is too old to be on your parents' cell phone plan? How old is too old to do a backflip into the pool? How old is too old to sleep in a racecar bed? 40. The answer is always 40. *Doomscrolling!! Russia isn't happy about the loss of their warship but they'd like to remind everyone that it only sank because of a small grease fire in the kitchen. What if face masks are the cause of the next civil war? John Hinckley Jr is putting on a concert and the tickets are sold out. Florida investigators announced today that they believe the ride operator was partially to blame for a teen's death at ICON Park last month. *A divorce lawyer shares the top five jobs for guys with the biggest egos and messiest divorces. *A jury awarded a man $450,000 for having to suffer through a birthday party at work. *Thanks for listening! Have a great day! Follow us everywhere @churchoflazlo and... -Everybody Wang Chung!!