Carefully RecklessHey y'all! You ever got into a new relationship and then started thinking about your ex?? Welp, so did the person in today's story! Tap in to hear how Jess (and Taylor) think you should handle it!
Welcome to Can't Flee Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio and the Black Effects, And just like that, we're back with yet another carefully reckless episode with your girl Jess.
Hilarious.
So what I be doing, i'd be fixed and mess. So we're gonna jump straight into it. I'm here with my girl.
Taylor, say hey, hey, hey, and she's not gonna be reading.
We're gonna give our a little break, but she's definitely gonna help me with some insight on this mess. Give you all some insight on this messh O, here we go. Good morning to Jess. Hope all is going well and I continue to wish you nothing but blessings.
Let's dive in.
I was together with my ex for about two years. We met our senior year in college and instantly became inseparable. Things were so perfect at the time, and I just knew he was the perfect man for me. We made investments together, like buying land okay, to build our own house, and we even shared.
A fur baby. What's up pet? Oh my god, Okay, that's nice. Okay. I was so for sure knew I was gonna marry this man.
Oh yeah, this nigga got you're talking crazy, because that was the crazy sentence listening.
I was so for sure knew I was gonna marry this man.
Maybe she meant that I was so for sure knew all right now.
A little later down the road, things began to unravel.
We started arguing about the dumbest things, stopped going on dates, and it even got so bad we had to give away out of her baby.
Damn.
We just grew apart and wanted different things, so we decided to call it quits, which affected us both pretty deep. This was all four years ago. Right now I'm engaged, and not to a man but a woman. Now, Okay, congratulations for crossing over. She'd been showing me everything I've been missing in Jess. Things are just so different and refreshing. I really feel I found my soulmate. So here's the hiccup, though. The other day I ran into the X at a dealership. I haven't saw him since we decided to split, so it was kind of weird at first. Girl, When this man noticed it was me, his eyes got big as fuck, and he started to walk over and gave me the tightest hug and asked how I've been. I wasn't expecting that because shit, I wasn't about the hugging back. But all right, I guess hello, els girl, you hugged that nigga the fuck like and it beten and I had been no Meghan good Michael Eely moment to be it bet not lift you off your motherfucker feet and spin your round. Anyways, we were chit chat and catching up for about thirty minutes while waiting for service. I know, thirty minutes is like forever until one of us got helped. It was a cool, genuine conversation and he even congratulated me on my engagement. Conversation came to an end, we both said it was good running into each other and gave each other another big heart.
You made another big hug.
I know this may sound wrong, but ever since that happened, I've been sort of thinking about him. Yeah, alright, new track like you ain't wanna how gum bet you already know what's up? I know you won't dick You're It's like, now I'm fucking with you because you are happy right now. I would never do anything that jeopardize my relationship, but thoughts do come to mind, like what if we did make it or what if we worked out and just try it again? Oh man, I know this sounds terrible and I don't even know why I'm thinking like this because I love my fiance Jess, I swear I do. I ain't the one you got to convince baby. I really want to get him out of my mind. And I don't know how you think time will pass? Well, time definitely gonna pass. See y'all not asking the right questions because she said you think time will pass.
The time won't always pass.
But I think like she's trying to ask me, do you think it'll get better with time where I just won't think about him anymore eventually? Okay? Or this may mean something else, silly thinking. Just help me, Okay, what.
Is dealing with?
She trej into a lesbid relationship?
But you know what?
That but you know what, you know what, this is the thing, because let's just take it all the way back.
Is he the reason you went gay? Why did you decide to turn to women? Though maybe okay, yeah she didn't she didn't state that, but yeah, you know what, that's my question also to women who can just like break gay out the gate right where you always having these feelings of women for women, you just didn't know how to convey them or express them, or you didn't know what it was. Because a lot of people be gaying don't even realize what it is, and so they get older, you know what I'm saying. So I don't know if she was bisexual or not. However, I know a lot of women like to try something totally different, try to opposite sex because of a really bad breakup or because one guy hurt them so badly that they can't give another guy a chance.
That's crazy, Yeah, And.
That's what it sounds like here, because if all it took was for you to see him again four years later and you start having butterflies, because I know what that description is.
Now.
She did not say butterflies, but baby, that's exactly what she meant, Like butterflies came to you know, she got a row, She got excited that nigga hug that he was probably kind of like you know, some Gucci or some them what is it, what's one of them clones? He was probably smelling like Creed or Gucci or something like that. And your ass got all, you know, all bashful again, and you just took a trip down memory Lane. Now I know you. I'm not saying you don't love your fiance. I'm not saying that. However, it just seems like unfinished business with this man. She didn't they like they just broke up because they were just Yeah, she said, I was together with my ex for about two years. We met our senior year in college and instantly became inseparable. Those things were so perfect at that time. And I just knew he remember, she said, I just knew he was the one for sure.
She said, I was so for sured I was going to marry this man. So if you got to that point with him, you know what I mean.
But she probably has also maybe fear too, because she's engaged. So you're saying that she thought was going to marry him. So now it's like, oh shit, Like.
Because how many people do you get that feeling about? How many people in your life actually, like, how many relationships do you actually go through in life where you actually feel that way like, no, I'm gonna marry this man or I'm gonna marry this woman. You know what I'm saying. I've never had that until me being with Chris. Now, I'm gonna be completely honest with you. Yeah, when I was with like I was with Wayne, Wayne, and listen, I remember I recall people asked me, what's the best relationship you've been and I used to say Wayne, But I was saying Wayne for all the wrong reasons. I got tired of taking care of niggas and actually just being the breadwinner and always having to pay for everything. And when Wayne came along and he was doing all those things for me, I fell for that more so than falling for him. I just loved being taken care of and being splurged on and being able to say, oh I want this and I'll get it, or I'll get it without even asking. Now, Chris is all that and more for me. You know, it's actually part a partnership now, you know, because the problem with Wayne is Wayne was always in competition with me. Really good guy, good friend, you know what I'm saying. Like, but I always say this, and I'll say it again. We would have made great friends and great business partners, but not a couple, you get what I'm saying. But yeah, like I actually, this is the first time that I actually felt like I want to spend the rest of my life with the person that I'm with now, you.
Know what I'm saying.
So to her story, you only feel like that a few like maybe once or twice about a person, you know what I mean, Like with this other girl. Though, Hold up, hold up, I know this shit getting good, But listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen, all right. The first relationship was two years she said she met her.
Let me say, let me say. Anyways, we were chit chatting it up. Okay, Okay, she's showing.
Me so so she said, this was all four years ago. Right now, I'm engaged. She doesn't even really give me any context about her goddamn fiance. Now, it's just she's been showing me everything I've been missing, and just things are just so different and refreshing.
Yeah.
Yeah, she said she really felt like she found her sold me. Okay, cool, And she really didn't give us a reason why she broke up with the boyfriend.
She just said.
Now.
A little later down the line, that begins to unravel. We started arguing about the dumbest things, stopped going on dates, and it even got so bad we had to give away our fur baby.
We know, y'all, ain't white, because ain't nobody white giving away.
No goddamn dogs, y'all just gonna cool parent the best way y'all can shit.
But yeah, I mean, so I don't know.
She said they just grew apart and wanted different things, so they decided to call it quit.
So that was a recial.
Breakoupor memory lane.
And yeah, like because any other time you probably wasn't thinking about him, So like that's really what mattered. If you were thinking of him throughout the four years and even into this new relationship, and that's different. But like that you don't you don't really think it's much there because it was just a moment. Yeah, if I say, an action from four years ago today feeling.
I'm not, I'm not that's the thing. That's what It just still seems like it's a little bit more. They're not saying that she been doubling back or checking on him throughout those four years or anything like that, like they've been talking or anything. I think that it all came back when she saw him and the fact that he was probably still supportive of her new relationship or whatever, because she did say he even said he congratulated me on what I'm you know, my engagement now and there was no beef, no bad blood like you just yeah, yeah, I gotta be fucked up if you got wife and she's sitting at home thinking about leaving her fucking fiance for him again, and he's like, oh no, but you're worried. That's why I was happy to see you, because it's like, oh, you know, we both moved on, we're both doing well. Or what if he gave oh my bitch the fucking possibilities.
Mmm, he's sucking it up. But the girl girl, all right, So who's the question.
Does she think that those feelings are gonna last? And I don't think they should unless you keep harping on it.
Just how well she coming to me to ask me for my help. This is a little lot you actually writing me about this. It's been on your mind, this has been on your mind. And then I don't know when she wrote this to me. I think I got this story like two weeks ago. I don't know how you know nothing against you know, let's be in relationships.
But if you had to dick before, you.
Know what the fuck is giving, especially when you you know, when you're riding, you know there's only so much you could do to little deal though, you know. Yeah, So I don't know, y'all, but I think, honestly, before you actually sit down and have a conversation with your fiance, because that's just what it's gonna have to come down to it.
Because she missed her man, she missed her ex.
I don't know, because if she, like I said, if she wasn't thinking about him before, yeah, just seeing him today, maybe just maybe something's going on with her relationship with.
Right right, it's like a little rocky a little bit in the first sign of you know, somebody else that she sees or whatever she did, because people do overthink things, and it could be a situation where she's like just really overthinking.
I'm not sure.
I don't know, but I I feel like it's more than that, because I do want to know what that period of time was between when she saw him in her writing me, because if that was like, what if that was like a week? What if that's too you won't think about this nigga for two weeks and you write writing somebody about him. So that's why I say, you're gonna have to sit down. You don't think it's worth to even bring up to the fiance, because then that's going to bring up securities.
I think things happen.
I mean, you even take I guess she could probably take she's seen him again as a sign, but I don't think so. I think move on with your next relation.
Yeah, definitely just just move on.
Okay, well I should, Taylor think you should just move on. Just do not even bring it up to your fiance. I think you should see what his situation is before like making your decision.
It just seems like she just she stuck. She suck.
Maybe she like she's rethinking things, so I don't know, but it just it definitely seemed like she's stuck.
I think you should figure.
Out where he at, like what he's doing, and did he even give you any type of signs like damn, I want you back or you know what I'm saying, because he like, like we said, he could just be so fucking happy because he also moved on and there's no bad blood. It ain't nothing like being like friends, which acts being cool, Like that's how me and rom are, Like we're cool. Now, mind you, he's the only ex that I actually was still called.
Do you think if you guys didn't have a child together, that it would be like that though.
Me and Rome.
Hell no, damn, I've been Actually no, no, I actually don't think so, because even on Rome side, I think if I never had his child, Rome wouldn't respect me.
Rome is not.
Rome is not that guy who like totally respects women. Like it's something about his mom dying at such a young age and him not being able to figure that out, figure out why she left him, or you know, it's still that little boy inside of him that didn't that you know, that didn't grow up past ten because he lost his mom at such a young age and she was his primary parent. Like that's who he ate with, slept with, breathe with, shit with. So I mean his dad was, he was there, but he wasn't. I think that plays a lot on how Rome is with women. And like every other baby mother, I'm rome favorite baby mother, Like I'm rome best friend, not even just saying baby mother, like I'm Rome's confidant, I'm his mentor that's my guy, Like we like best friends, you know what I'm saying.
And I don't think.
Our relationship would be like that or our friendship would be like that. If it wasn't for our son, because we had to change up the way that we did everything for our son, so Rome wouldn't really have any motivation to respect me.
If it wasn't for our son. That's how I feel, and that actually goes deeper.
But that's another conversation for another day because baby Daddy's be tripping. But now we got a commercial, and if you click off this podcast, I swear I'm an beat your ass.
Listen.
Yeah, I think you should see what your exes acts, see where his head is that, and then you come back and you update me. But as far as you just jumping out there telling your your fiance, I think after you you figure out where your excess head is that, even if you want to, I mean, because you might want to explore that, you know it's unfinished business.
Obviously.
After you figure that out, then you have to figure out if it is if it's worth leaving something that makes you so happy right now because they didn't break up bad, nobody cheated. I mean, unless you're just leaving that part out, y'all, you left some meat off the bones. I mean, I don't know four years ago, four years ago, I'm just still on that. The reason why is this from my own personal experience, Like I don't think. I think let things be where they were. Have you ever been in a situation like this, not necessarily.
Like that, but like where there was a guy that like was always a what if, like that was like my best friend at the end of the day and then we but then now come to find out he was playing me the entire time in a sense, like he was like one of them guys that kind of said things to make a woman feel good. That yeah, he was absolutely so once I figured that out, like we tried to give it a chance, and I started seeing certain flaws with him and just seeing how he's been trying to manipulate mm hmmm.
And plus his girl called me and then we had a nice conversation.
Oh wow.
Yeah, so he was your friend or he was somebody that was yeah, like he was at the end of the day, he was my friend first. So for him to lie to me and everything else like that, it was crazy. That messes up the foundation of the friendship. Like we can never go back to that because you lied to me friends only you can't be me real with me.
We ain't even together yet. Yeah, so he could go to hell. Yeah, okay, damn you putting them there?
No that like the time.
Don't like once you css because he was something like I really like confined.
Across that and you pay trust. Yeah okay, yeah.
I mean they don't have that situation when I'm just saying even still, I just feel like love past stuff kind of yeah, leave it alone because scenario scenario, she could go back to this man and then the same shit could happen. And now you just let the love of your life walk out of your life, because yeah, I've done that.
Chance, I've done that, and I actually did that with Rome. I remember Ash was about two years old and no, he was one one year old and I I was with somebody else. Now I think Ash was two one or two and I was with somebody else and Rome was calling me telling me he wanted his family back, and I wanted my family when I was younger. That's just what you want, you know, you want a y'all to be in the same household or just to know their mom and dad to be together, because that's the household I grew up in. My mom and my dad was together, and shit, I broke up with the nigga because Rome and confessed to me they was never gonna do it no more. He confessed everything that he did and everything, and I'm sorry.
You know, I want my family.
And I was a little boy and we were still fucking twenty one twenty two at the time, but I felt for that shit being young and that nigga cheated on me not even twenty four hours after I got back with him after leaving somebody who was great for me, great for Ashton.
And he was the older guy, too, older guy, like he.
Just he didn't have no kids, he wasn't married before, like like this was like a great like a create player type nigga.
Like if you could make your nigga that that was the one.
I don't kill them.
He worked out and everything like girl and then wrong nigga wrong and shit, no, I you know, I just want my family. I went back that nigga cheated on me dead. Why the fuck my dumb man try to run back to the guy like you know what, psych He was like, Oh.
No, bitch, I ain't fucking with you. Fuck dad, I ain't fucking with you. Take over your little clowns baby.
For Yeah, I went over there like it was a pranky like bitch no to this day, girl, to this day.
But now he's I'm a drugs in jail and all that type of shit.
So fucked up his life, that guy, that guy, So that's what a good for not taking me back? The fuck sorry, fuck wrong with you, nigga. You could have had a life. You could have been with me now. But because I left you from a baby fall for for one twenty four hour period.
Oh now, let you alone. That's on your shit. Now.
Look, that's all right. We've come to the end of yet another carefully Reckless episode with your girl.
Just hilarious.
I'm here on my girl, Taylor, say thank you, Taylor. Don't say nothing, Taylor. The listeners say thank you Taylor. There we go, okay, and now you say you're welcome. You're welcome, all right, and we see y'all next week. Please can't. Fully Reckless is a production of iHeart Radio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
