Second Date Update: Lick My Neck

Published Nov 15, 2023, 4:05 PM

Out of every Second Date we’ve done this year, TODAY’S might be the most MEMORABLE of the bunch.

Second date update. When listeners submit requests for phone taps or second date updates, they'll send us an email. Or you can also fill out like a little questionnaire on our website.

Yeah, we have like a submit for me. Actually, go to Brook Jeffrey dot com slash submit.

Yeah that's almost too easy. Yeah, if you do it. There's a section on there where we ask people to tell us a little bit about themselves so that we can get an idea of who they are. And the guy on the phone today wrote in the about me section he alligator wrestles on the weekends, what has a collection of inflatable blow up dolls, and used to drive submarines for Russia until they fired him when he opened a window underwater and they didn't like that.

Shut up.

I don't know. I'm just gonna take him at his word for it. Please welcome disgraced Russian submarine captain Eric to the show.

Hello.

Helloow, Eric's not a very Russian name, And yeah, I don't protect you any Russian accent. You must be mus be quite the spy now, I mean I.

Get it, like you'd want fresh air if you're on a submarine, right, you know?

Makes sense?

I'm just so funny.

Guessing some of that about me section wasn't one hundred percent true.

Well, I think you can all agree he gets a little stuffy with all the men on a submarine.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My hey, thanks for the laugh already. We didn't even get you on the phone before I started laughing.

Yeah, Brook, it doesn't laugh that hard at any of my jobs, so you should probably be in my role. But we I know you wanted to do a second date update here. You went out with a woman recently.

I do. Yes, I went out with a very lovely woman by the name of Dana, and he had what I thought was a terrific date.

Can I ask real quick, did you guys meet on a dating app?

We did?

Does your dating app include the Russian submarine information?

I don't remember whether I included that on the app. I mean, you know, I've got so many things that I used. It may have I don't.

So what stood out to you about Dana.

Well, there was one particular photo that I really liked. It was part of the city that's near and dear to me, and I saw her sitting there and it just it really attracted me to her.

Oh, it's interesting, like she obviously loves something you love.

Is it the sewer where you wrestle alligators? Is that the area of the city?

Well, you know what, as funny as that would be, no, really, we we uh connected on travel, that's probably the main thing. Okay, he was a fan of that, and I had a lot of photos from my travel experiences. I not to say I'm the around the world an eighty days guy or anything, but I've sent to a number of countries that I've enjoyed.

So so, which country did you travel to for your first date?

Wouldn't that be?

Was that exotic?

Oh my god?

Or did you go simpler with it?

Well?

No, we went much simpler, and really I don't want to name names. We were mostly on opposite sides of the city, and she set it up. She was willing to come toward my side of the city to a small place I hadn't heard of.

Oh, she found the spot that was near you.

It was closer to me. I wouldn't say near me, but closer to me. She came more than halfway to meet me.

Was a restaurant where we at.

It was a restaurant. It was a very small, independent Italian restaurant. It was lovely weather. We sat outside at a glass of wine, had dinner, just rehash some of what we had talked about on our initial phone calls.

Okay, what was the vibe between you two?

I was very much attracted to her, and I very much thought she was attracted to me.

Okay, based on what was there, like a moment or like a like something that happened that gave you that feeling.

Oh, that she was attracted to me. Nothing well for you, you read into this what you think.

But she showed up.

She was and she didn't leave, so she must be at least so sort of.

Until times when I talked she responded when she went to the restroom, she actually came back.

Wow. I mean, I know this sounds crazy, but a lot of these second dates and with them going to the bathroom and ever coming.

Back, When will she be back from the restroom? Yeah, okay, I do want to mention. I do want to mention the moment that you asked for, and you can tell me what you think of this. That is when it was time to leave. I had such an enjoyable time with her that we got up to leave and she was standing in front of me. Her hair was up okay, and the back of her bare neck was in front of me, and I just couldn't help that. I bent down and I gave her a kiss on the neck.

And then on the back of her neck back like she didn't even see you coming.

Did not see me coming. That just made me like clinch my As crazy as it sounds, or creepy as it, she turned around and smiled.

Are you sure it wasn't a cringe?

I am sure, because some things happened later on. I don't want to go into detail. It was nothing that.

She kissed the back of your legs.

No, not at all.

He starts top, she starts down.

We got to know each other a little bit better. We were slightly more intimate than that.

Well, maybe you did find a good match, because I my gut reaction to somebody doing that would probably be like turn around and elbow and the face or something.

You know.

You know what's bad. When Brook says she isn't into it because she hasn't gotten any action for years, honestly, lick my.

Neck, Well I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Yeah, maybe that's the reason why she's not reaching back to me.

Okay.

It's hard to think though, because she she did. Yeah, I'm assuming you're saying made out with you.

Yeah, that was it exactly. I kissed her as tenderly as I could, and she certainly wasn't against it.

Okay. The more you describe your kissing, the less I like the neck kiss out. Yeah, We're going to go into as little description as possible when we call her, and then we'll come back get your second date update, hopefully if she answers, should we call her tenderly?

No?

No, I don't know. Okay, I think she's had enough tender stuff happened in the last few hours. We'll come back get your second date update right after this hold on second date update. You know, for our social media I feel like we don't do quite enough to describe what's happening in these second date phone calls.

Okay, yeah, I mean because it's we obviously can't have the listener.

On video, right, I think we need to give people more of a visual of what happened on Eric's date the other night. So we're gonna start rolling some video right here in the studio and have Brooke get up out of her seat and walk around to a Lexus, I tingerly kiss her on the back of the neck the same way that Eric did to Daniel. I have a feeling, Alexis, you're gonna like this way more than you think you will. We've had this request on the export, but you might go back after this happens and start kissing all of your female roommates on the back of the neck. This might be a new like bonding activity.

My breath is hot because I just had I had with my I've never seen this excited. You can feel me coming from like four inches away.

All right, here comes Brooks doing a little Saunter dance over behind Alexis. Alexis exposed your neck to her. Please just digging through your hair. It's not gonna work too much. God, should we get the scissors out?

I don't know.

I'm to let you know. I'm turned off.

Sorry, turned off, dude.

Your neck is kind of hairy.

Tried the girls in studio. Do you think, though, that's the reason that Eric is not getting a call back because that was his go to move anything like what I just felt.

I can't imagine being Eric and making that decision to.

Make that Eric. They're thinking that might be the reason that she's not calling you back.

I certainly hope not. At the time, it seemed like the thing to do.

Had you pulled that move before? Or is this the first time a question?

No, first and only time. I couldn't help myself. I was attracted to her.

That's honestly better.

Because she had bent down, leaving her neck a little bit exposed in like a shark on Shark Week. Eric swam out from behind one of the tables and just pointed one on her open neck.

There were no teeth involved, No, I mean they did make.

Out later, so she wasn't completely turned off.

Must have been sort of into it. Those Italian wines at that restaurant must have hit pretty hard.

I need some of that right now.

Now we got to call it Dana. Here we go. I'm gonna dial her number right now. We'll see if she picks up. Hello, Hey, we're looking for Dana.

Yes.

Uh.

This is a radio show called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. That's why I said we Hi, there's more people.

Here, Okay, Hi, can I help you?

Yeah?

We're doing a segment called a Second Date Update, and we're trying to help a guy that you went out with get in touch with you again so that you guys can meet up one more time.

I'm not sure I'm interested in participating in this, to be honest with you.

Well, it will be when you find out who it is, you know, because as far as we've heard, it was a great night, at least according to Eric.

Oh my god, Italian restaurant.

Yeah, yeah, I got it.

What did you think about the date?

I don't know. I mean, it was going okay, but I don't know. After we hung out, I was kind of just reflecting on the whole date thing, and he he just seems overly comfortable and experienced, like more than I expected and more than other guys that I've met on this app have been experienced. Like he seems really used to dating, like he just did this all the time.

Like he's an adult male. Awkward.

I feel like he would want somebody who feels comfortable around him.

I guess I'm not describing it right. I'm talking more of like a jig, a little type of vibe like escort, Like.

What do you mean that we were talking about? Who uses the word tender a lot?

Yeah?

So I went home and I was telling my roommate about it, and she told me that there's this Facebook page called are We Dating the Same Guy? Do you know what that is?

A girl? I thought what that is? I thought you were going to say, and my roommate told me she hired him for me.

What are we dating the same guy?

So?

Are we dating the same guy? As the thing on Facebook where like it's basically a mainly women and you post the picture of.

The guy you're dating and you see if anybody in there is also dating the same guy, to see if he's like, you know, dating multiple people at the same time. Yeah, my roommate convinced me to post a picture on it, and I was like, whatever, doesn't seem like a bad idea.

I don't know. That page seems pretty toxic. I've seen showed it to me and it's like it's sketch.

Are I bet Eric came back with glowing reviews?

I don't take any woman on that page just one nice thing about the dude. Ever, it's never like here's the one that got away. Yeah, sometimes it says I don't know him, I haven't heard anything.

Maybe nobody said anything, But did you get any responses, any feedback?

Well, the interesting response is that there were people that says that they've been out with him on dates before and whatever. But most talking part was that like three other women have commented saying that he kissed him on the back of the neck, and I didn't even mention it in my post. Oh what yeah, Like so one girl comments in the picture saying that she had been out with him and he does this weird, super weird like back of the neck kiss, and then two other girls comment under that, like, oh my gosh, me too.

He told us that he had never used that move on any other woman before you that you inspired him to do it.

It was honestly so weird and so creepy. And it's like, this is like his bolling card.

I love that. Jeffrey so upset, like you got lied to I.

You know, it's like, jeff is upset. First I find out he's not really a Russian submarine captain, and now I find out he's actually kissing multiple women on the back of the neck.

What are you tell me next?

That he's secretly on the other line listening wanting to talk to you because he is Oh he's there.

He's having the phone.

Yeah.

Sorry, that's how the segment works. I'm sorry Dana erk.

The hello Gana, Hello, I'm here. Eric.

This is so, this is almost as awkward as the net kiss.

You told us that you didn't you didn't kiss anybody else.

Is this just something you do to everyone?

No, not at all. It was it was only you that what we had during the dinner. I couldn't control myself and there you were, Eric.

Probably Eric, I literally just said on the radio that three other women said the same exact thing, so without.

Her prompting them.

Yeah.

Well, I don't know. I don't know what to say to that. All I know is, yeah, I was so overtaken.

Just own up to it. Eric, it's a dumb move that you use that you thought was romantic.

Well, I don't think it was a dumb move. I mean it certainly progressed a date, that's true.

Yeah, I mean you didn't. You did stick around after the net kiss day.

I only stuck around because I thought it was only me. I didn't know he was a serial neck kisser going around the city.

Wait, you would have been okay if it was only you.

It seemed like a spontaneous romantic moment. That's Eric, we're.

Running out of time here. So I'm going to give you twenty seconds to talk to Dana. You can tell her whatever you want to say and try and convince her that you are really into her and you want to go out with her one more time.

Go ahead, Dana. I had such a lovely time with you, and I know you enjoyed being with me too. Oh please never mind whatever else it is that you're hearing. Please give us another chance. I know we spent some more time together that you're going to enjoy it. I really think there's something there.

It's like head he read a bad like sales book always.

I felt like it was Anthony Hopkins reading a line from Silence of the Lambs. But it's up to you, Dana. Would you like to go out with Eric one more time? We would pay for that date.

I mean, look, it was a little bit weird that other girls said it, but up until that point I was totally fine with it. But once you got on and deny, the other girls said that, now you're just a creepy Ana liar, Like now it's.

A trig thing.

Yeah, Eric, I'm sorry. Man. We tried for you, and I really.

Was hoping for a different outcome. Dane, Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure. You stop dating women in this town.

We all know about it. You don't have to find a new move. I think, dude, you're gonna have to go for a different part of the body, maybe behind the ears. That's his go to a sneak attack guy, go to everyone kisses.

On the list, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.

Well, gentlemen, take surprise back of the next kiss out of your rolodex of first date move. Eric ruined it for us. Eric, Yeah, I picture in my mind at least like seven hundred men taking out a little black book, giant red marker crossing it off. I was actually thinking this, like as a bro. If one of my homies and I'm like, dude, how was your date last night? And if he said, well, I got a neck kiss, I would be worried. Congratulations.

I mean maybe when you're kissing and you move down, it's like just that, not the.

Back of the neck.

And that's where where we're starting.

The problem with the kiss was not that it isn't sexy. It's that it's too played out. Eric has done it to too.

Many women in this issue.

Now it's not unique anymore. It's like gently brushing the hair out of a girl's face. Everybody's done it. It's not sweet. Don't don't touch my hair.

I don't want to see you for a reason.

Actually from Alexius.

I feel like Alexis would flinch, but you would.

But even though that move is now officially not allowed anymore, no more net kisses. There's plenty of other things you can go with, plenty of other ways you can screw things up, and we're gonna We're gonna be there for you through all the mistakes. It will help you get back on track. Email the show. We'll call that person who isn't calling you back. You can check out all of our second Date podcasts learn all the mistakes people have made in their past. Wherever you get your podcasts that

Brooke and Jeffrey Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning,

Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update

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