This is an iHeartRadio New Zealand podcast.

This is an iHeartRadio New Zealand podcast.

Women.

Women.

This week on Between Two Beers, we talked to Brie Thomas L.

This week on Between Two Beers, we talked to Brie Thomas L.

Brie is one of New.

Brie is one of New.

Zealand's most popular and loved broadcasters. She's a hilarious, fun loving co host of Zm'sbri and Clint Drive show. She's the host of Celebrity Treasure Island on TV and Z. She has one point five million followers across his social media channels and in twenty twenty two was named New Zealand TV's Personality of the Year. She's also just released her book, and in it we discover a different side of Brie. She writes about some of the most difficult and challenging chapters of her life, and in this episode she talks about it all publicly for the first time. We hear about the home invasion it in NaN's when she was nine, where she thought she was going to die, and how it contributed to anxiety and panic attacks throughout her life. We talk about a challenge is revealing her sexuality to her dad and why she kept it secret for ten years, Her Big Life Regrets, a journey of discovery with ADHD as an adult, and where her sense of social justice comes from. We also talk about how she built her huge following on social media, all the best stories from a relationship with her mum, Channing Tatum, Radio Wars, and we read through some of Shamus as dms he sent Brie seven years ago. I messaged Brie halfway through reading her book to say how captivating and powerful it was and how many people it's going to help. And I've got no doubt by the end of this you'll understand that too. It's a really cool chat. It's bre sharing her story, what's and all. And I also highly recommend her book, Unapologetically Me, which is out now. We're also stoked to tell you about the business we've built. If you'd like to get one of our ipic geston to MC or speak at your function or event, flick us a message by going to B to B speakers dot co dot nzin This episode is brought to you by tab Download the new app today and get your bet on. Listen on my Heart, where you get your podcasts from, or watch the video on YouTube.

Zealand's most popular and loved broadcasters. She's a hilarious, fun loving co host of Zm'sbri and Clint Drive show. She's the host of Celebrity Treasure Island on TV and Z. She has one point five million followers across his social media channels and in twenty twenty two was named New Zealand TV's Personality of the Year. She's also just released her book, and in it we discover a different side of Brie. She writes about some of the most difficult and challenging chapters of her life, and in this episode she talks about it all publicly for the first time. We hear about the home invasion it in NaN's when she was nine, where she thought she was going to die, and how it contributed to anxiety and panic attacks throughout her life. We talk about a challenge is revealing her sexuality to her dad and why she kept it secret for ten years, Her Big Life Regrets, a journey of discovery with ADHD as an adult, and where her sense of social justice comes from. We also talk about how she built her huge following on social media, all the best stories from a relationship with her mum, Channing Tatum, Radio Wars, and we read through some of Shamus as dms he sent Brie seven years ago. I messaged Brie halfway through reading her book to say how captivating and powerful it was and how many people it's going to help. And I've got no doubt by the end of this you'll understand that too. It's a really cool chat. It's bre sharing her story, what's and all. And I also highly recommend her book, Unapologetically Me, which is out now. We're also stoked to tell you about the business we've built. If you'd like to get one of our ipic geston to MC or speak at your function or event, flick us a message by going to B to B speakers dot co dot nzin This episode is brought to you by tab Download the new app today and get your bet on. Listen on my Heart, where you get your podcasts from, or watch the video on YouTube.

Enjoy pre Thomas l Welcome to Between Two Beers Lads.

Enjoy pre Thomas l Welcome to Between Two Beers Lads.

It's about bloody times.

It's about bloody times.

So good, ah, so good, so good to be here. We're recording this two weeks before your book, unapologetically me as released, but we have read it and I won't speak on behalf of shame at lease, I please bloody loved it. It's seriously it's such a good read, Gena. I can't wait to talk about everything that's in it. But it's also incredibly revealing. You speak in the book a lot about your anxiety, and it's kind of where I wanted to start. How was the anxiety levels in the thoughts of everyone reading about your life?

So good, ah, so good, so good to be here. We're recording this two weeks before your book, unapologetically me as released, but we have read it and I won't speak on behalf of shame at lease, I please bloody loved it. It's seriously it's such a good read, Gena. I can't wait to talk about everything that's in it. But it's also incredibly revealing. You speak in the book a lot about your anxiety, and it's kind of where I wanted to start. How was the anxiety levels in the thoughts of everyone reading about your life?

Oh? Mate, First of all, thank you so much for saying that, and also thank you guys so.

Oh? Mate, First of all, thank you so much for saying that, and also thank you guys so.

Much for being so supportive. Steve, you sent me a message, was it last week?

Much for being so supportive. Steve, you sent me a message, was it last week?

Yeah, you're halfway through the book and that meant everything to me because my anxiety has been at one hundred.

Yeah, you're halfway through the book and that meant everything to me because my anxiety has been at one hundred.

Because it's it's quite.

Because it's it's quite.

An interesting thought where you've put down every piece of dirty laundry that you can think of into a book and everyone's going to read it. So you sending through those words meant a lot to me and calm my nerves a little bit.

An interesting thought where you've put down every piece of dirty laundry that you can think of into a book and everyone's going to read it. So you sending through those words meant a lot to me and calm my nerves a little bit.

So I really appreciate.

So I really appreciate.

That She's free. That comes from previous guests and I think it was Haley Holt was like, just send the text. And I was reading the book and I was halfway through. I was like, fuck, this is so good. And I figured because it's a pre release that we're getting, not many people will have read it. And I was like, I bet she is so anxious about this going out, especially reading about anxiety, so like, just send the text.

That She's free. That comes from previous guests and I think it was Haley Holt was like, just send the text. And I was reading the book and I was halfway through. I was like, fuck, this is so good. And I figured because it's a pre release that we're getting, not many people will have read it. And I was like, I bet she is so anxious about this going out, especially reading about anxiety, so like, just send the text.

Yeah. It was the right move, Yeah, the right move for sure.

Yeah. It was the right move, Yeah, the right move for sure.

Well, I think we saw you maybe like a couple of days later as well. Yeah, afterwards, and that was I don't know, like the hug almost felt like a oh yeah, a little bit like you kind of sunk into it, like yeah, yeah, I can imagine. I mean, I've listened to a lot of stuff in the research for this, and I know there's some overlap between stuff that you've spoken about before and now stuff that you're putting in the book. But yeah, I guess when you condense it all into one piece of work, it could be quite overwhelming to think about.

Well, I think we saw you maybe like a couple of days later as well. Yeah, afterwards, and that was I don't know, like the hug almost felt like a oh yeah, a little bit like you kind of sunk into it, like yeah, yeah, I can imagine. I mean, I've listened to a lot of stuff in the research for this, and I know there's some overlap between stuff that you've spoken about before and now stuff that you're putting in the book. But yeah, I guess when you condense it all into one piece of work, it could be quite overwhelming to think about.

Absolutely, But I just thought at the beginning of this process, there's no point in writing it unless I'm going to be completely honest, and I hope that's what I've done.

Absolutely, But I just thought at the beginning of this process, there's no point in writing it unless I'm going to be completely honest, and I hope that's what I've done.

And I just hope it helps some people.

And I just hope it helps some people.

Was the process quite training? And we're going to talk about what's in it, but the actual process of sort of revisiting some of these memories and I think you worked with a ghost writer and talking about your shit and talking with family about some tough things from the past. Was that quite training?

Was the process quite training? And we're going to talk about what's in it, but the actual process of sort of revisiting some of these memories and I think you worked with a ghost writer and talking about your shit and talking with family about some tough things from the past. Was that quite training?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Shout out to Sophie Neville, my ghostwriter, absolute saying of a woman who I did pay her in therapy fees afterwards, the amount of times I cried in cafes, Like I said, we need to start meeting somewhere else. I'm going to be banned from all these cafes. But yeah, it was so mentally draining because a lot of the stuff, and I feel like we as people are like this where you bury a lot of things, and even if you've worked through them in the past, you then bury it again because it's just too hard to kind of bring those things up all the time. But I actually found it really cathartic as well, and I've gotten a lot out of the whole process, and it's forced upon a few conversations between family members that should have happened a long time ago, and just other things like that. So it's been really rewarding as well.

Shout out to Sophie Neville, my ghostwriter, absolute saying of a woman who I did pay her in therapy fees afterwards, the amount of times I cried in cafes, Like I said, we need to start meeting somewhere else. I'm going to be banned from all these cafes. But yeah, it was so mentally draining because a lot of the stuff, and I feel like we as people are like this where you bury a lot of things, and even if you've worked through them in the past, you then bury it again because it's just too hard to kind of bring those things up all the time. But I actually found it really cathartic as well, and I've gotten a lot out of the whole process, and it's forced upon a few conversations between family members that should have happened a long time ago, and just other things like that. So it's been really rewarding as well.

For sure.

For sure.

Yeah, we're going to talk about we'll keep teasing the things. We're going to get to things, but first there might be some people listening that don't know Bri And I think your appeal as how relatable you are, and it certainly comes across in the book. But the question I wanted to ask is does your life feel like surreal? Like You've got one point five million people following on social media, you're the host of New Zealand's biggest TV show, one of the country's most popular radio hosts, recently won an award for New Zealand TV Personality of the Year. But you're just Australian, I know, And you'll just breathe like does it just seem crazy?

Yeah, we're going to talk about we'll keep teasing the things. We're going to get to things, but first there might be some people listening that don't know Bri And I think your appeal as how relatable you are, and it certainly comes across in the book. But the question I wanted to ask is does your life feel like surreal? Like You've got one point five million people following on social media, you're the host of New Zealand's biggest TV show, one of the country's most popular radio hosts, recently won an award for New Zealand TV Personality of the Year. But you're just Australian, I know, And you'll just breathe like does it just seem crazy?

I feel like I pinch myself all the time and I'm like, how did I end up here?

I feel like I pinch myself all the time and I'm like, how did I end up here?

Why?

Why?

Me?

Me?

Like I don't deserve that any of this stuff, And I feel like some of the people around me will always reassure me and they're like, You're exactly where you're meant to be. But imposter syndrome, which I do talk a little bit about in the book, is very real. Like I don't really think I've taken it all in and most of the time I'm so busy that I don't ever stop to be in the moment, which I need to learn to do more.

Like I don't deserve that any of this stuff, And I feel like some of the people around me will always reassure me and they're like, You're exactly where you're meant to be. But imposter syndrome, which I do talk a little bit about in the book, is very real. Like I don't really think I've taken it all in and most of the time I'm so busy that I don't ever stop to be in the moment, which I need to learn to do more.

I think.

I think.

Is it because you you are incredibly busy and you've got this incredible work ethic I think as well, which you've picked up from your old man.

Is it because you you are incredibly busy and you've got this incredible work ethic I think as well, which you've picked up from your old man.

Yeah, you're spot on, Shay. I've never met anyone that's harder working than my father, and I saw that growing up. But yeah, I think so, I definitely need to learn to slow down a bit. I think, but I feel like with what I lack in natural talent, I make up in work ethic and I just work my ass off if I want something. And I've kind of learned that over my career that you know, I might not be the best or the most talented in the room, but I'll outwork anyone.

Yeah, you're spot on, Shay. I've never met anyone that's harder working than my father, and I saw that growing up. But yeah, I think so, I definitely need to learn to slow down a bit. I think, but I feel like with what I lack in natural talent, I make up in work ethic and I just work my ass off if I want something. And I've kind of learned that over my career that you know, I might not be the best or the most talented in the room, but I'll outwork anyone.

And we've spoken to a lot of people in your life and that theme comes through. I'm actually going to read something from.

And we've spoken to a lot of people in your life and that theme comes through. I'm actually going to read something from.

Rosbos, Oh did you talk to.

Rosbos, Oh did you talk to.

He said? Look, she works herself to the bone to some point, although she's really figured out a good balance now on when to stop. But she heads off and does a TV show and then without complaint, is coming back and voicing those TV shows, which is fucking hard. She's voicing all morning, writing scripts and stuff, comes into us and gives everything to the radio show, and now, as you know, writing a book, recording the audio for that book as well, which I think is really fucking hard. Then she'll get home and renovate her house, walker dogs. She just doesn't stop. But everyone gets the same version of her, which I think is quite good. It's not like she burns it so hard that by the end of the day she's fucked and we get the bad version. It's the same all round.

He said? Look, she works herself to the bone to some point, although she's really figured out a good balance now on when to stop. But she heads off and does a TV show and then without complaint, is coming back and voicing those TV shows, which is fucking hard. She's voicing all morning, writing scripts and stuff, comes into us and gives everything to the radio show, and now, as you know, writing a book, recording the audio for that book as well, which I think is really fucking hard. Then she'll get home and renovate her house, walker dogs. She just doesn't stop. But everyone gets the same version of her, which I think is quite good. It's not like she burns it so hard that by the end of the day she's fucked and we get the bad version. It's the same all round.

Oh that's really nice of Ross, Boss.

Oh that's really nice of Ross, Boss.

Yeah, does that feel right?

Yeah, does that feel right?

Like you are always kind of like you're working hard, but it's not you know too much.

Like you are always kind of like you're working hard, but it's not you know too much.

Yeah, I feel like there is times where I burn myself out. I've gotten better over the years to realize that a burden when that happens, so I try not to get to that point. But with what Ross is saying, like with radio especially, it's always my number one and there's just no way that I can give less than one hundred and ten percent in any thing, which I feel like is a detriment to myself sometimes because You'll always get my one hundred and ten percent no matter what, no matter how busy I am, no matter how tired, I'm always in there one hundred and ten percent. That's that's my only that's my only gear for sure.

Yeah, I feel like there is times where I burn myself out. I've gotten better over the years to realize that a burden when that happens, so I try not to get to that point. But with what Ross is saying, like with radio especially, it's always my number one and there's just no way that I can give less than one hundred and ten percent in any thing, which I feel like is a detriment to myself sometimes because You'll always get my one hundred and ten percent no matter what, no matter how busy I am, no matter how tired, I'm always in there one hundred and ten percent. That's that's my only that's my only gear for sure.

Yeah, that's a good way to be.

Yeah, that's a good way to be.

What does a day?

What does a day?

What is like? Right now?

What is like? Right now?

What does a day in the life look like? Because CTI is on, Yes, you've got the book coming out yep, sounds like you're voicing the audio version, which that must be a cathartic experience in itself as well. It's one thing to write, it's another thing to read it out loud in your own voice.

What does a day in the life look like? Because CTI is on, Yes, you've got the book coming out yep, sounds like you're voicing the audio version, which that must be a cathartic experience in itself as well. It's one thing to write, it's another thing to read it out loud in your own voice.

It's real hard, ay, lads, Like I I walked in there not really knowing what to expect. But put a person with ADHD in a room, in a little tiny room for three hours and you have to read out loud.

It's real hard, ay, lads, Like I I walked in there not really knowing what to expect. But put a person with ADHD in a room, in a little tiny room for three hours and you have to read out loud.

That's my worst nightmare.

That's my worst nightmare.

And so it's been really difficult. I feel like it's set me over the edge a few times where I'm like, after an hour or so, I just get real tired, like and you start to make mistakes, like where it just brings back all this old trauma of sitting in a classroom you know, and reading out loud. And but it's been it's been so interesting. I always love adding a new skill to my repertoire. But yeah, at the moment, voicing episodes for ct I. Then I'll go voice the book, then I'll do some prep work for the radio show. Then I'll come and do a podcast with you guys, and just I'm all over the shop. But I feel like I'm at my best when I'm when I'm my busiest, you know, when I don't have too much time to think and just knuckle down and put it, put in the work.

And so it's been really difficult. I feel like it's set me over the edge a few times where I'm like, after an hour or so, I just get real tired, like and you start to make mistakes, like where it just brings back all this old trauma of sitting in a classroom you know, and reading out loud. And but it's been it's been so interesting. I always love adding a new skill to my repertoire. But yeah, at the moment, voicing episodes for ct I. Then I'll go voice the book, then I'll do some prep work for the radio show. Then I'll come and do a podcast with you guys, and just I'm all over the shop. But I feel like I'm at my best when I'm when I'm my busiest, you know, when I don't have too much time to think and just knuckle down and put it, put in the work.

So this is only the third time we've met.

So this is only the third time we've met.

Is it really? I feel like I've known you guys.

Is it really? I feel like I've known you guys.

We shared a very unsuccessful night at the casino and podcast towards. I think you guys were calling me Ryan or not.

We shared a very unsuccessful night at the casino and podcast towards. I think you guys were calling me Ryan or not.

I know who you are?

I know who you are?

Who you are?

Who you are?

You got n on the joke and then yeah, Ryan was born.

You got n on the joke and then yeah, Ryan was born.

I'm so confident Lee was calling you Ryan as well. And I've been actually sitting on something for a while that I was going to bring up.

I'm so confident Lee was calling you Ryan as well. And I've been actually sitting on something for a while that I was going to bring up.

I was waiting for this podcast.

I was waiting for this podcast.

No, look, can I just preface this with saying that the Radio Awards is where we all let it hang out and we get a little bit missy and we have a few drinks and this and that. I called you Ryan.

No, look, can I just preface this with saying that the Radio Awards is where we all let it hang out and we get a little bit missy and we have a few drinks and this and that. I called you Ryan.

Because I thought you were someone else. Do you know, do you know.

Because I thought you were someone else. Do you know, do you know.

Brides right?

Brides right?

My wife has has amazed me, and Ryan Bridges as well is amazing.

My wife has has amazed me, and Ryan Bridges as well is amazing.

Onto that.

Onto that.

Up. But don't I mean not not a bad compliment though. Good looking lad, good looking lad.

Up. But don't I mean not not a bad compliment though. Good looking lad, good looking lad.

Okay, So you thought I was rying, you thought.

Okay, So you thought I was rying, you thought.

Well, I think I met you when you were on your own and I just assumed because it was radio and he was getting into radio at the time, and I was like excited about it.

Well, I think I met you when you were on your own and I just assumed because it was radio and he was getting into radio at the time, and I was like excited about it.

I was like, oh, that's cool. He's coming over and I was like, oh, here he is. Oh he's God, look at a person. And then when I saw you guys together, I was like, oh fuck, that's not him.

I was like, oh, that's cool. He's coming over and I was like, oh, here he is. Oh he's God, look at a person. And then when I saw you guys together, I was like, oh fuck, that's not him.

Thank you, well, that's good. Thank you for sitting on that until now.

Thank you, well, that's good. Thank you for sitting on that until now.

Thank you, Thank you for your share, and thank you for your share too, shape because I was very surprised.

Thank you, Thank you for your share, and thank you for your share too, shape because I was very surprised.

Let's embarrass someone else.

Let's embarrass someone else.

I was very surprised to learn that your relationship was Shamus stretched back quite a bit further than that night.

I was very surprised to learn that your relationship was Shamus stretched back quite a bit further than that night.

Relationships are real stretch. It's a very one way situation until the podcast, the Radio and Podcast Awards.

Relationships are real stretch. It's a very one way situation until the podcast, the Radio and Podcast Awards.

Yeah, because I didn't realize our relationship, you know, we went back further.

Yeah, because I didn't realize our relationship, you know, we went back further.

Either, exactly.

Either, exactly.

So for a little bit of background here, we recorded an episode with PJS from the Hits a few years ago. We talked about some embarrassing dms Shamus had sent her and this was in his what i'll call the his pesting era. Gotcha, and he's a different man now and it was a different time, but I was very interested to hear that he had been in your dms from as far back as fifteenth of December twenty seventeenth.

So for a little bit of background here, we recorded an episode with PJS from the Hits a few years ago. We talked about some embarrassing dms Shamus had sent her and this was in his what i'll call the his pesting era. Gotcha, and he's a different man now and it was a different time, but I was very interested to hear that he had been in your dms from as far back as fifteenth of December twenty seventeenth.

Is that how long ago it was?

Is that how long ago it was?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Can I just add an extra layer of mortification to this, because so I volunteered this information to Stephen yesterday afternoon, late yesterday an he sort of peeked my head around the laptop and went just out of would it interest you to know?

Can I just add an extra layer of mortification to this, because so I volunteered this information to Stephen yesterday afternoon, late yesterday an he sort of peeked my head around the laptop and went just out of would it interest you to know?

So?

So?

Sheeapi, I feel like I need to tell you this bro.

Sheeapi, I feel like I need to tell you this bro.

In looking in cross referencing the timing of the messages to you and to PJ. Yes, same same nights, same exact so I'm not special, same exact night. I've got a type clearly, okay, so clearly you do so I've written out the DMS.

In looking in cross referencing the timing of the messages to you and to PJ. Yes, same same nights, same exact so I'm not special, same exact night. I've got a type clearly, okay, so clearly you do so I've written out the DMS.

I want to hear him. I think he double messaged me. Didn't.

I want to hear him. I think he double messaged me. Didn't.

Oh, it's worse. Geenth of December twenty seventeen, Shamus, what opportunity are you moving to New Zealand for asking for a friend?

Oh, it's worse. Geenth of December twenty seventeen, Shamus, what opportunity are you moving to New Zealand for asking for a friend?

That's not that's nice.

That's not that's nice.

No response, there's no Three months later of February twenty eighteen, Seamus, Hey, no response, just a hey. Fourth of May twenty eighteen, Seamus, hey you, no response. Twenty eighth of July twenty eighteen, Shamous.

No response, there's no Three months later of February twenty eighteen, Seamus, Hey, no response, just a hey. Fourth of May twenty eighteen, Seamus, hey you, no response. Twenty eighth of July twenty eighteen, Shamous.

I just want to die again, Bri question mark, just nothing, just my name.

I just want to die again, Bri question mark, just nothing, just my name.

So he's gone in five times, four times, four times. And then the seventh of June twenty twenty four after we meet you at the Radio Awards, this is you now, okay, Seamus, Finally we are friends. Bloody lovely meeting you and Ryan last night. Aha. I just saw all your old messages. I feel very rude that I haven't replied. I'll reply now. It's a radio gigun did him moving? Well you've finally got a.

So he's gone in five times, four times, four times. And then the seventh of June twenty twenty four after we meet you at the Radio Awards, this is you now, okay, Seamus, Finally we are friends. Bloody lovely meeting you and Ryan last night. Aha. I just saw all your old messages. I feel very rude that I haven't replied. I'll reply now. It's a radio gigun did him moving? Well you've finally got a.

Reply, Yeah, thank you, You're welcome.

Reply, Yeah, thank you, You're welcome.

And to add I think I deep down I knew that they were sitting in there and we used to see you at inside me on the on the lobby floor, and I was way too scared to come up and introduce myself and say hi because of that, because I was avoiding because I thought, yeah, okay, it's out but it's out there.

And to add I think I deep down I knew that they were sitting in there and we used to see you at inside me on the on the lobby floor, and I was way too scared to come up and introduce myself and say hi because of that, because I was avoiding because I thought, yeah, okay, it's out but it's out there.

It's a good host offering yourself up like that. Well done.

It's a good host offering yourself up like that. Well done.

I did say, actually I'll add this as well. I did say when I spoke to your mom on Friday, I said, in a different world, die, you could have been my mother in law, could have been.

I did say, actually I'll add this as well. I did say when I spoke to your mom on Friday, I said, in a different world, die, you could have been my mother in law, could have been.

Yeah, she would have loved that.

Yeah, she would have loved that.

She did. Although have you told no, just not my story to tell.

She did. Although have you told no, just not my story to tell.

Ryan, It's my story to tell. I'll tell Ryan Slash Stephen.

Ryan, It's my story to tell. I'll tell Ryan Slash Stephen.

Shamus talked to my mother and sent me a lovely message afterwards, just being like, just spoke to your lovely mother. And we had a bit of a chat and then Seamus was like, I think you should know that she did so I sounded very hot her words, not mine, really, it sounds like my mother. And this is where I'm gonna throw her under the bus, is she did some research on you guys.

Shamus talked to my mother and sent me a lovely message afterwards, just being like, just spoke to your lovely mother. And we had a bit of a chat and then Seamus was like, I think you should know that she did so I sounded very hot her words, not mine, really, it sounds like my mother. And this is where I'm gonna throw her under the bus, is she did some research on you guys.

She told you so she knew what you Ryan. I told her.

She told you so she knew what you Ryan. I told her.

She because she goes you're suan, aren't you shames. You're shameless, aren't you? And you do it with Ryan Stephen you've talked to said this is brilliant. You've spoken to Bree and prep. But she did do some research.

She because she goes you're suan, aren't you shames. You're shameless, aren't you? And you do it with Ryan Stephen you've talked to said this is brilliant. You've spoken to Bree and prep. But she did do some research.

She did some research and she saw a couple of videos of you guys, so she knows exactly what you look like, and said that both of you were very good looking and to say hello and give you guys a hug from her typical my mother always she's happily married.

She did some research and she saw a couple of videos of you guys, so she knows exactly what you look like, and said that both of you were very good looking and to say hello and give you guys a hug from her typical my mother always she's happily married.

But you know she was also more interested in the episode with Stephen Price. God don't get it, and that seems down a rabbit hole of they play cards with Wayne Bennett. Your parents played cards, Dolphin.

But you know she was also more interested in the episode with Stephen Price. God don't get it, and that seems down a rabbit hole of they play cards with Wayne Bennett. Your parents played cards, Dolphin.

Fun fact about Stephen Price. She's like childhood here and we did this episode with him. It meant so much episode. He brought his book and the sign like he's bought yours in and Steve wrote his name. He wrote his name wrong, spelt shamous. I'm so embarrassed to say.

Fun fact about Stephen Price. She's like childhood here and we did this episode with him. It meant so much episode. He brought his book and the sign like he's bought yours in and Steve wrote his name. He wrote his name wrong, spelt shamous. I'm so embarrassed to say.

Bless his heart. Yeah, obviously coming from Queensland, we're.

Bless his heart. Yeah, obviously coming from Queensland, we're.

Huge, huge rugby league fears and you know, my mum saw you and she was like, god, see him, Friday looks good like you said to me last week.

Huge, huge rugby league fears and you know, my mum saw you and she was like, god, see him, Friday looks good like you said to me last week.

That was funny.

That was funny.

It's good you can use that, you know.

It's good you can use that, you know.

I'll do that. I'll do that no matter what. I'll take credits.

I'll do that. I'll do that no matter what. I'll take credits.

That's a good bass.

That's a good bass.

We'll be right back after this short break. Now, this is going to be one of the hardest transitions that we're going to do in between's history. But we're going to go into some stuff. Okay, And I don't know if you've ever spoken about this before. It's in the book and it kind of lays the foundation for the anxiety that you've suffered through your life and a lot of stuff that's going on. But I was hoping you could tell us about what happened when you were nine at your NaN's house.

We'll be right back after this short break. Now, this is going to be one of the hardest transitions that we're going to do in between's history. But we're going to go into some stuff. Okay, And I don't know if you've ever spoken about this before. It's in the book and it kind of lays the foundation for the anxiety that you've suffered through your life and a lot of stuff that's going on. But I was hoping you could tell us about what happened when you were nine at your NaN's house.

Yeah.

Yeah.

When I and you did write Steve when I was nine, it kind of put my life on a different trajectory. I think when I was nine, I was home sick from school and my mum and my brother and I went into town to visit my nan because she lived in Stanthorpe Township, so in the actual little town and we lived on the outskirts out on a farm.

When I and you did write Steve when I was nine, it kind of put my life on a different trajectory. I think when I was nine, I was home sick from school and my mum and my brother and I went into town to visit my nan because she lived in Stanthorpe Township, so in the actual little town and we lived on the outskirts out on a farm.

But yeah, went in there on I.

But yeah, went in there on I.

Think it was the day before Melbourne Cup actually, and I was sitting at the kitchen table, and we were kind of, you know, in a country town, never seen a bad thing happen, very kind of naive to anything bad happening in the world, really good childhood. And there was a knock at the door, and my Nan obviously got up to go answer it, and all I remember from that point is just hearing these voices that didn't sound familiar, and they pushed their way into the house with knives, and I realized at that point that something bad was happening. And if you've ever heard the saying I was scared stiff, I feel like I really understand that saying because I just remember not being able.

Think it was the day before Melbourne Cup actually, and I was sitting at the kitchen table, and we were kind of, you know, in a country town, never seen a bad thing happen, very kind of naive to anything bad happening in the world, really good childhood. And there was a knock at the door, and my Nan obviously got up to go answer it, and all I remember from that point is just hearing these voices that didn't sound familiar, and they pushed their way into the house with knives, and I realized at that point that something bad was happening. And if you've ever heard the saying I was scared stiff, I feel like I really understand that saying because I just remember not being able.

To move my body at all.

To move my body at all.

And these two guys, I soon realized, were there to hurt us and to take things from the house. And it was, to this day, the scariest thing that I've ever been through. And they held us up in that house for I think it was about ten minutes while one of them ransacked the house and the other one kind of was getting very irate and angry at my mum, me and my Nan. And it was just the moment that changed my life forever, and I truly believed I was going to die, And even like thinking about it now, like going back to that moment, I still remember what they smelt like. I remember, you know how I felt. I remember tears coming out of my eyes and not with no sound like because I was just so scared to make a noise that I would be killed by these two guys. And I feel like writing this book and going through the process of writing this book, I've realized how much that moment has shaped different parts of me moving throughout my life, and how it's something that yeah, changed my brain forever and the way that I see the world. But also looking back on it now, I think I realized why my mum, my Nan and I had such a close bond going through something like that. And there was one point where one of the guys said that he was going to take me as a nine year old, they were going to take me with them, and I remember my mom standing up and she was really calm, and she looked at this guy and she was just like, take me. I will go with you. I'll do whatever you want, just don't take my twitter. And I think we all kind of have this thought that our parents would die for us.

And these two guys, I soon realized, were there to hurt us and to take things from the house. And it was, to this day, the scariest thing that I've ever been through. And they held us up in that house for I think it was about ten minutes while one of them ransacked the house and the other one kind of was getting very irate and angry at my mum, me and my Nan. And it was just the moment that changed my life forever, and I truly believed I was going to die, And even like thinking about it now, like going back to that moment, I still remember what they smelt like. I remember, you know how I felt. I remember tears coming out of my eyes and not with no sound like because I was just so scared to make a noise that I would be killed by these two guys. And I feel like writing this book and going through the process of writing this book, I've realized how much that moment has shaped different parts of me moving throughout my life, and how it's something that yeah, changed my brain forever and the way that I see the world. But also looking back on it now, I think I realized why my mum, my Nan and I had such a close bond going through something like that. And there was one point where one of the guys said that he was going to take me as a nine year old, they were going to take me with them, and I remember my mom standing up and she was really calm, and she looked at this guy and she was just like, take me. I will go with you. I'll do whatever you want, just don't take my twitter. And I think we all kind of have this thought that our parents would die for us.

But I saw that my mum.

But I saw that my mum.

Really would, you know, And I think it's a big reason as to why my mum and I have this deep, deep connection where I saw she would give her life for me, you know. And it's such an important part of the book because yeah, as you said, Steve, it was the catalyst to you know, that traumatic event has they're then carried on in my life with anxiet and the way I deal with certain situations.

Really would, you know, And I think it's a big reason as to why my mum and I have this deep, deep connection where I saw she would give her life for me, you know. And it's such an important part of the book because yeah, as you said, Steve, it was the catalyst to you know, that traumatic event has they're then carried on in my life with anxiet and the way I deal with certain situations.

When you make the decision to write, when you get approached by the publisher to write a book, you obviously know that this is like a foundational story in it and it like, can we say, shaped your life?

When you make the decision to write, when you get approached by the publisher to write a book, you obviously know that this is like a foundational story in it and it like, can we say, shaped your life?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Was it an easy decision to put it in? Did you know you had to put it in? Or was there any resistance to sort of revisiting that and talking to your mum about what happened?

Was it an easy decision to put it in? Did you know you had to put it in? Or was there any resistance to sort of revisiting that and talking to your mum about what happened?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Absolutely, because it wasn't just my story, like my mom and my nan who has passed since obviously that happened. It was also my mum's story, and I wanted to make sure that I talked to her and that she was okay with it, and she was so supportive as my mum is, and she was like, you know, it's a big part of your story, and I think it needs.

Absolutely, because it wasn't just my story, like my mom and my nan who has passed since obviously that happened. It was also my mum's story, and I wanted to make sure that I talked to her and that she was okay with it, and she was so supportive as my mum is, and she was like, you know, it's a big part of your story, and I think it needs.

To be in the book. So she was just on board straight away.

To be in the book. So she was just on board straight away.

And that was one chapter that I did send to her before it went to print because I wanted her to read it and make sure that she was comfortable with it and that she felt like it captured what happened there that day. And Yeah, she was nothing but supportive.

And that was one chapter that I did send to her before it went to print because I wanted her to read it and make sure that she was comfortable with it and that she felt like it captured what happened there that day. And Yeah, she was nothing but supportive.

I asked her about it when we spoke, and I was audibly moved as you are now talking about it and even trying to frame the right way to ask her about it, and it just brought it home, like the three generations of women being in that position at the time.

I asked her about it when we spoke, and I was audibly moved as you are now talking about it and even trying to frame the right way to ask her about it, and it just brought it home, like the three generations of women being in that position at the time.

And as she was answering.

And as she was answering.

She did so like she it's your recollection from a nine year old girl's perspective, and that's really confronting to read. And that's as someone who's not directly related to you, know, totally Like I imagine her reading that as your mum. And I don't know whether you'd, ever, like Steven said, spoken to her about how that impacted you, or whether her reading the words was the first time to really understand the depth of effect that that had on you.

She did so like she it's your recollection from a nine year old girl's perspective, and that's really confronting to read. And that's as someone who's not directly related to you, know, totally Like I imagine her reading that as your mum. And I don't know whether you'd, ever, like Steven said, spoken to her about how that impacted you, or whether her reading the words was the first time to really understand the depth of effect that that had on you.

Yeah, that's such a good question. I think we didn't talk about it for a long long time. It's only been in recent years where her and I have had a few more conversations about it and me having this realization that she is just the most amazing mom in the whole world. Where as a kid, I didn't see how it affected.

Yeah, that's such a good question. I think we didn't talk about it for a long long time. It's only been in recent years where her and I have had a few more conversations about it and me having this realization that she is just the most amazing mom in the whole world. Where as a kid, I didn't see how it affected.

Her at all.

Her at all.

You know, her goal was to make sure I was okay. She did everything for me, and typical in typical fashion, kind of you know, neglected herself and her own mental health around what happened to us. And it's been really amazing talking to her and understanding that she has gone through a lot of the same things I've gone through since that day. And I've just felt a lot of guilt as well, like realizing that she put me before herself even after that day and continues to do that in her life. But yeah, it's quite an interesting one, and I feel like in the process of writing this book, I've learned a lot more about how it's affected her and the things she went through as well.

You know, her goal was to make sure I was okay. She did everything for me, and typical in typical fashion, kind of you know, neglected herself and her own mental health around what happened to us. And it's been really amazing talking to her and understanding that she has gone through a lot of the same things I've gone through since that day. And I've just felt a lot of guilt as well, like realizing that she put me before herself even after that day and continues to do that in her life. But yeah, it's quite an interesting one, and I feel like in the process of writing this book, I've learned a lot more about how it's affected her and the things she went through as well.

Yeah, I think for what it's worth.

Yeah, I think for what it's worth.

She was also saying that as she's got older as well, she takes real solace in the fact that not just you, but your brother and sister as well are able to look after her and take her.

She was also saying that as she's got older as well, she takes real solace in the fact that not just you, but your brother and sister as well are able to look after her and take her.

And I think it's for everybody.

And I think it's for everybody.

As you get older in life, the roles sort of reverse a little bit and you do start looking at for your pearance.

As you get older in life, the roles sort of reverse a little bit and you do start looking at for your pearance.

Yeah, totally.

Yeah, totally.

It was just last year I went on a europe trip for the first time and my parents were going and so I tacked on a week where it was just me and my mum and dad and we did Italy together and there was this moment where we'd booked an airbnb that was dodgy as fuck, like and this we couldn't get in, and this guy came down to let us in, and he was a bit scruffy and you know, not very welcoming, and it just sent my mum into a spiral. And in that moment, I was like, oh, I know what is happening here because I go through the same things.

It was just last year I went on a europe trip for the first time and my parents were going and so I tacked on a week where it was just me and my mum and dad and we did Italy together and there was this moment where we'd booked an airbnb that was dodgy as fuck, like and this we couldn't get in, and this guy came down to let us in, and he was a bit scruffy and you know, not very welcoming, and it just sent my mum into a spiral. And in that moment, I was like, oh, I know what is happening here because I go through the same things.

And I just.

And I just.

Popped her a lazzi and you know, just looked after her because I was like, that was one of the first times where I've really seen her have a panic attack, because she's just hidden it so well. And in that moment, I just remember saying to her, I was like it's okay, Mom, I understand, like, you know, you can talk to me, And yeah, it was quite quite a special moment and the little razepam did its job.

Popped her a lazzi and you know, just looked after her because I was like, that was one of the first times where I've really seen her have a panic attack, because she's just hidden it so well. And in that moment, I just remember saying to her, I was like it's okay, Mom, I understand, like, you know, you can talk to me, And yeah, it was quite quite a special moment and the little razepam did its job.

You mentioned that panic attack, and that's something you talk about in the book as well. You started having panic attacks, you know, after the invasion. But can you tell us about sort of how that developed and because again I feel like it's okay to ask you about it, because absolutely, but like you went to therapy and you tried that, but it didn't work, and at one point you were just ready to put it in the rearview mirror and like, no, I'm just going to move on. But then as you turned into an adult, the anxiety was still there. Can you tell us about how that sort of evolved?

You mentioned that panic attack, and that's something you talk about in the book as well. You started having panic attacks, you know, after the invasion. But can you tell us about sort of how that developed and because again I feel like it's okay to ask you about it, because absolutely, but like you went to therapy and you tried that, but it didn't work, and at one point you were just ready to put it in the rearview mirror and like, no, I'm just going to move on. But then as you turned into an adult, the anxiety was still there. Can you tell us about how that sort of evolved?

Yeah, totally.

Yeah, totally.

I remember it was about two weeks after that home invasion. And obviously this was you know in the late nineties where therapy wasn't especially in country Queensland, you know, therapy wasn't a thing or like going to a councilor wasn't the normal thing. And I remember my mom like even looking back, she was like, I need to take this kid to someone to talk to about the things that have happened, and I can't remember how many times I went or you know who that was that I talked to, but I remember her saying to me, you got in the car one day and You're like, I'm sick of talking about it.

I remember it was about two weeks after that home invasion. And obviously this was you know in the late nineties where therapy wasn't especially in country Queensland, you know, therapy wasn't a thing or like going to a councilor wasn't the normal thing. And I remember my mom like even looking back, she was like, I need to take this kid to someone to talk to about the things that have happened, and I can't remember how many times I went or you know who that was that I talked to, but I remember her saying to me, you got in the car one day and You're like, I'm sick of talking about it.

Don't want to talk about it anymore. I want to move on. And that was kind of it for therapy as a kid.

Don't want to talk about it anymore. I want to move on. And that was kind of it for therapy as a kid.

And I feel like it was probably not the right decision because as I've grown up and gotten older, anxiety has reared its ugly head in many many ways in my life, and it's been something that I have battled throughout my entire life since that day.

And I feel like it was probably not the right decision because as I've grown up and gotten older, anxiety has reared its ugly head in many many ways in my life, and it's been something that I have battled throughout my entire life since that day.

Yeah, before you addressed it in the book, how often were you opening the door on it to either look at it or address it? Or was it as easy as it in the rearview mirror. I know that's not easy, but is it? Yeah? How did it manifest itself as you progress through your life? Yeah?

Yeah, before you addressed it in the book, how often were you opening the door on it to either look at it or address it? Or was it as easy as it in the rearview mirror. I know that's not easy, but is it? Yeah? How did it manifest itself as you progress through your life? Yeah?

I think I definitely shut the door on it and didn't do the work that I probably should have and still haven't, to be honest, Like, and in the process of writing this book, I think there's a lot more work I need to do, but it would manifest it itself in ways where I just have this intense fear of dying and that can be set off by the tiniest thing and just caused me to spiral and throughout my twenties. In my early thirties, I've had two mental breakdowns which I talk about in the book, where I truly, truly believe I'm going to die and I know it stems back from that traumatic event in my childhood and it's something that I'm terrified all the time that'll happen happen again. I've been to many therapists over the years to talk to about things, but I've never found that right fit. So I'm still on that journey of finding that right person because i know, yeah, there's work to be done for sure.

I think I definitely shut the door on it and didn't do the work that I probably should have and still haven't, to be honest, Like, and in the process of writing this book, I think there's a lot more work I need to do, but it would manifest it itself in ways where I just have this intense fear of dying and that can be set off by the tiniest thing and just caused me to spiral and throughout my twenties. In my early thirties, I've had two mental breakdowns which I talk about in the book, where I truly, truly believe I'm going to die and I know it stems back from that traumatic event in my childhood and it's something that I'm terrified all the time that'll happen happen again. I've been to many therapists over the years to talk to about things, but I've never found that right fit. So I'm still on that journey of finding that right person because i know, yeah, there's work to be done for sure.

Yeah, it's interesting with such a public facing profile and huge platforms like yours when you do talk about it and I know you talked about it on the air and you've got an overwhelming response right saying I'm struggling, this is me being real about your anxiety And what was the feedback like on that?

Yeah, it's interesting with such a public facing profile and huge platforms like yours when you do talk about it and I know you talked about it on the air and you've got an overwhelming response right saying I'm struggling, this is me being real about your anxiety And what was the feedback like on that?

Oh, and even touching back on that when I did talk about it, I feel like I literally just touched the surface of what was really going on, because I feel like I kind of filtered it a little bit because it was I was in a really dark place. But even just touching on that and opening up on air, I was so overwhelmed, like hundreds, hundreds, thousands of messages from people who pretty much were like, I feel the exact same way, you know, And I feel like it was at a time where everyone's mental health was really on the decline. Like I felt feel like that was the real, you know issue, not COVID. That was the pandemic in my eyes, this mental health pandemic that had been created by what everyone was going through and what the world was going through. But in a way, like receiving all these messages and all these people who were like, I'm struggling, I feel the same because my whole goal was to make people feel less alone and like they were not the only ones. But in turn it made me feel the same as well. And that's something that social media is amazing for. There's good things about social media, and yeah, connecting with people.

Oh, and even touching back on that when I did talk about it, I feel like I literally just touched the surface of what was really going on, because I feel like I kind of filtered it a little bit because it was I was in a really dark place. But even just touching on that and opening up on air, I was so overwhelmed, like hundreds, hundreds, thousands of messages from people who pretty much were like, I feel the exact same way, you know, And I feel like it was at a time where everyone's mental health was really on the decline. Like I felt feel like that was the real, you know issue, not COVID. That was the pandemic in my eyes, this mental health pandemic that had been created by what everyone was going through and what the world was going through. But in a way, like receiving all these messages and all these people who were like, I'm struggling, I feel the same because my whole goal was to make people feel less alone and like they were not the only ones. But in turn it made me feel the same as well. And that's something that social media is amazing for. There's good things about social media, and yeah, connecting with people.

Is one of them.

Is one of them.

They's so powerful a when like you're you're kind of persona and I know you did another part of your broadcasting career where you talked about stuff, but for the most part, it's kind of like fun bree and funny to your mom and jokes and things, and so for you to just be real and like let the fuild down, it's so strong.

They's so powerful a when like you're you're kind of persona and I know you did another part of your broadcasting career where you talked about stuff, but for the most part, it's kind of like fun bree and funny to your mom and jokes and things, and so for you to just be real and like let the fuild down, it's so strong.

I feel like it's way more impactful because people are kind of like, wait a second, like I didn't realize that, and I feel like it's so often they're not. It's something we don't realize someone's struggling through, and it's always a silent struggle. So yeah, I think you're dead right, even though it was very difficult because normally, I mean, I cover everything with humor. That's just what people do, especially me, Like that's a big part of my personality. Like even you know, in awkward situations, I'll like cover it with humor or you know, if someone says something nice to me, I'll cover it with humor, just because that's my go to and my safe space. So to do something like that on air where there wasn't a gag at the end, there wasn't a joke, was this is just me being real was something I'm really proud of looking back on it.

I feel like it's way more impactful because people are kind of like, wait a second, like I didn't realize that, and I feel like it's so often they're not. It's something we don't realize someone's struggling through, and it's always a silent struggle. So yeah, I think you're dead right, even though it was very difficult because normally, I mean, I cover everything with humor. That's just what people do, especially me, Like that's a big part of my personality. Like even you know, in awkward situations, I'll like cover it with humor or you know, if someone says something nice to me, I'll cover it with humor, just because that's my go to and my safe space. So to do something like that on air where there wasn't a gag at the end, there wasn't a joke, was this is just me being real was something I'm really proud of looking back on it.

But I think the Stevens point about your relatability. I feel like that translate translates into real life that when you like, I think when people see your your you, it's like their mate that's cracked it. Yeah you know, that's made it and.

But I think the Stevens point about your relatability. I feel like that translate translates into real life that when you like, I think when people see your your you, it's like their mate that's cracked it. Yeah you know, that's made it and.

Oh that's such a nice way to look at.

Oh that's such a nice way to look at.

It, do you know what I mean?

It, do you know what I mean?

And then when your mate that's cracked it admits, oh fuck, I'm actually I'm battling a little bit here, everybody goes a fucking hell, I don't want that. Yeah, I didn't realize that. Yeah that's a statement, not a question, but it's kind of Yeah, was rattling around in my head.

And then when your mate that's cracked it admits, oh fuck, I'm actually I'm battling a little bit here, everybody goes a fucking hell, I don't want that. Yeah, I didn't realize that. Yeah that's a statement, not a question, but it's kind of Yeah, was rattling around in my head.

I think you're dead right.

I think you're dead right.

And that's that's how I feel all the time, is that I'm just someone's mate who happened to slink my way into radio and on TV. And I feel like that's why I truly feel like that person that's kind of broken through and kind of like, hey, guys, that's.

And that's that's how I feel all the time, is that I'm just someone's mate who happened to slink my way into radio and on TV. And I feel like that's why I truly feel like that person that's kind of broken through and kind of like, hey, guys, that's.

Let me on TV. I can't believe it, Guys, I can't believe it. Watch this. I'll say something outrageous, you know.

Let me on TV. I can't believe it, Guys, I can't believe it. Watch this. I'll say something outrageous, you know.

And I really do feel like that the community that follows me online, I truly feel like, is this amazing as weird?

And I really do feel like that the community that follows me online, I truly feel like, is this amazing as weird?

As it sounds like family that we've kind of grown.

As it sounds like family that we've kind of grown.

Up together, and it's really cool, like that's something I really really do love about that world.

Up together, and it's really cool, like that's something I really really do love about that world.

We'll be right back after this short break. The other really powerful theme in the book is your sexuality journey and coming out. And this was the other time I sent you a message. I was parked at the supermarket and I was reading the book and I had tears in my eyes because you detail, you know, you came out to your mum, not to your dad for too long, ten years, about a decade. And then it was a trip back home with your girlfriend, who I think you'd sort of introduced as your friend. And at the end of the two weeks or how along you were there, it was a dad kind of pulled you into the corridor and had a conversation with you. Yeah, and you speak about how it's one of your great regrets that you didn't tell him earlier. But can you tell us about the dynamic with your dad and why it took so long?

We'll be right back after this short break. The other really powerful theme in the book is your sexuality journey and coming out. And this was the other time I sent you a message. I was parked at the supermarket and I was reading the book and I had tears in my eyes because you detail, you know, you came out to your mum, not to your dad for too long, ten years, about a decade. And then it was a trip back home with your girlfriend, who I think you'd sort of introduced as your friend. And at the end of the two weeks or how along you were there, it was a dad kind of pulled you into the corridor and had a conversation with you. Yeah, and you speak about how it's one of your great regrets that you didn't tell him earlier. But can you tell us about the dynamic with your dad and why it took so long?

Totally, So, my dad is Italian.

Totally, So, my dad is Italian.

His family migrated over to Australia in the fifties to have a better life because Italy was so poverty stricken. In those days from the war, and so my dad's first language was Italian.

His family migrated over to Australia in the fifties to have a better life because Italy was so poverty stricken. In those days from the war, and so my dad's first language was Italian.

He grew up in a very Catholic Italian family, so church religion, Catholicism was a huge thing and still is in my dad's life. So growing up, we went to church every Saturday night, like that was a huge thing. And if you know anything about the Catholic Church and religion is that, you know, gay people are wrong and they're bad, and they're going to go to hell. You know.

He grew up in a very Catholic Italian family, so church religion, Catholicism was a huge thing and still is in my dad's life. So growing up, we went to church every Saturday night, like that was a huge thing. And if you know anything about the Catholic Church and religion is that, you know, gay people are wrong and they're bad, and they're going to go to hell. You know.

That's what I learned growing up my entire life, and what my dad learned growing up his entire life.

That's what I learned growing up my entire life, and what my dad learned growing up his entire life.

To this day, where he still goes to that church. So when I was first.

To this day, where he still goes to that church. So when I was first.

Dating a woman and I was twenty one, I was a kid, you know, and my partner at the time, who had very young parents, like she had very young parents, I think they had her when she was eighteen, were very accepting, very you know, forward thinking, and they knew all about her and I and they.

Dating a woman and I was twenty one, I was a kid, you know, and my partner at the time, who had very young parents, like she had very young parents, I think they had her when she was eighteen, were very accepting, very you know, forward thinking, and they knew all about her and I and they.

Were like kind of like second parents to me.

Were like kind of like second parents to me.

And she started pressuring me a little bit because we had been dating for a fair while and we were living together, and she was like, you need to tell your parents that you need to tell your parents and I remember avoiding it for a long time and it was the cause of quite a few arguments in our relationship, and eventually I caved and I text my mom.

And she started pressuring me a little bit because we had been dating for a fair while and we were living together, and she was like, you need to tell your parents that you need to tell your parents and I remember avoiding it for a long time and it was the cause of quite a few arguments in our relationship, and eventually I caved and I text my mom.

What a coward? Text her and she called me straight away and I was like, oh God, I'm dreading this.

What a coward? Text her and she called me straight away and I was like, oh God, I'm dreading this.

And my mum just asked all these questions at once, and it overwhelmed me. I was I don't really want to talk about this, but I remember because she came down and saw me, because I was living in Brisbane and she came and saw me and we talked about it in person for the first time. And the one thing I asked her was can you keep it a secret from Dad?

And my mum just asked all these questions at once, and it overwhelmed me. I was I don't really want to talk about this, but I remember because she came down and saw me, because I was living in Brisbane and she came and saw me and we talked about it in person for the first time. And the one thing I asked her was can you keep it a secret from Dad?

And like you said before, Steve, it was.

And like you said before, Steve, it was.

It's definitely I think my biggest regret in life saying that. But looking back, I was young and I was scared, and I didn't know how he was going to react, or if it was going to change how he felt about me, or if he was going to treat me differently, Like I truly didn't know, and my mum promised to keep that secret and she did for nearly a decade in a marriage where they don't have secrets, so you know, it's just another thing where I'm like, it showed her loyalty to me, where she put me first, and sometimes I really wish she didn't and she had told him a lot earlier.

It's definitely I think my biggest regret in life saying that. But looking back, I was young and I was scared, and I didn't know how he was going to react, or if it was going to change how he felt about me, or if he was going to treat me differently, Like I truly didn't know, and my mum promised to keep that secret and she did for nearly a decade in a marriage where they don't have secrets, so you know, it's just another thing where I'm like, it showed her loyalty to me, where she put me first, and sometimes I really wish she didn't and she had told him a lot earlier.

But hindsight's a funny thing, isn't it.

But hindsight's a funny thing, isn't it.

And is that one of the motivations for the book as well, so that people avoid that feeling of guilt and regret for not being who they are.

And is that one of the motivations for the book as well, so that people avoid that feeling of guilt and regret for not being who they are.

You're so spot on, Shay.

You're so spot on, Shay.

This book is for, Yeah, people who are scared to live completely authentically is themselves whatever that looks like. This book is for those people. Because if there's one thing that I can say is that secrets breed shame, you know, and it might feel like the easiest way at the time, but it's going to cause lasting damage for a lot longer in my opinion. So if I can encourage even one person to just be like, just try and find the courage to attack it head on, then that's the best way forward.

This book is for, Yeah, people who are scared to live completely authentically is themselves whatever that looks like. This book is for those people. Because if there's one thing that I can say is that secrets breed shame, you know, and it might feel like the easiest way at the time, but it's going to cause lasting damage for a lot longer in my opinion. So if I can encourage even one person to just be like, just try and find the courage to attack it head on, then that's the best way forward.

And without giving tips away on how not to behave How elaborate was your cover up regime from your dad?

And without giving tips away on how not to behave How elaborate was your cover up regime from your dad?

It was pretty elaborate, Like I think it got sloppy, like in the end, you know, I got a bit sloppy towards the end, because I really I feel I didn't give a shit towards the end. I just wanted it to be really wanted it to be.

It was pretty elaborate, Like I think it got sloppy, like in the end, you know, I got a bit sloppy towards the end, because I really I feel I didn't give a shit towards the end. I just wanted it to be really wanted it to be.

Out in the open. So I did get sloppy towards.

Out in the open. So I did get sloppy towards.

The end, but sloppy by like broadcasting it to hundreds of thousands of people on the radio.

The end, but sloppy by like broadcasting it to hundreds of thousands of people on the radio.