And That's What You REALLY MissedGet ready for some catnip for the soul because Kitty Wilde is in the house!
Becca Tobin reunites with Jenna and Kevin for a fun chat about her time on Glee, including admitting that she 'hate-watched' the show with other musical theater people . . . until she joined the cast, that is! The time she confused Ryan Murphy for a choreographer, a funny behind-the-scenes story about her very first scene with Jane Lynch and Chris Colfer, and playing it cool on set so she wouldn't come off as a crazy fan girl, which only made her come off as cold, but thankfully, they all became friends!
Plus, Becca shares the cautionary tale she got from a crew member when she joined the cast, life after Glee, and the panic of not finding the next gig right away and not realizing just how special the Glee experience was until she started working on other shows! It's a Glee-tastic episode!
And that's what you really missed with Jenna.
And Kevin an iHeartRadio.
Podcast Welcome to You, and that's what you really miss podcast Whoa Whoa, Whoa Whoa Woe.
Kitty Wilde is in the house.
We have the podcast Queen Herself Beca Tobin.
Without Becca, we wouldn't be here right now.
No, Beca is the reason why we started podcasting in the first place, the reason why we started podcasting about Glee in the first place.
She's so here we are a.
Brilliant, talented human being.
Mogul.
Uh yeah, just a little mini mogul.
It's so funny to hear her talk about Glee though, in the way that she does, because sometimes she's like so averse to things, and then like all of a sudden, she's like, this is the most joyful thing I've everd on, and it's so it's it's just surprising to me.
Sometimes she's a big old softy deep down in that.
She really is.
She's it's like that hard funge outside that you crack and there's like gooey ice cream inside.
She is just good people, and I think you have to like earn to get into her inner circle. And it is so worth it, but once you're in forget it. She is loyal to a fault. I mean, if you haven't listened to her podcast with Kelsey and Jack called The Lady Gang, go Do you live under a Rock? Yeah?
I mean it's been like nine years and now literally this is back in tel Then enjoy. Hello.
I just want to tell you it's wow having to watch Glee again.
Which one? Did you watch? The new Rachel You were so good though, I know I also love it because thank you.
I don't want to tell your story, but I have since found out that like you didn't even know what like how to like hit your mark, no, any of that.
Pushing that stroller was like the scariest thing of my life because Joaquin just walked over to me and was like, hey, this is your mark. And I was like, okay, I'm using context, clue, I'm assuming my mark means I stand on it.
I don't know. It was a fucking namer. I'll talk about it.
We okay, Well we learned that together. Like, I didn't know what that was.
Did you know what that was?
Kevin?
You had done some stuff that was okay, I didn't really know what that was. He had done the office. Jenna's right, episode so famous, already was a pizza boy.
But I we were, we were already like locked and loaded by the time you started.
Oh yeah, you were three seasons and you were like such old hat, Like it was such old hat? Is that the term? I don't even Yeah, I.
Think you're gonna cause old hags, and you wouldn't you were old hags, But I was the oldest hag.
To be clear, you are the oldest you are. You will always be the old.
Wait, I think aside obviously, aside from Corey the girl of.
The Marks of the Girls, you're the oldest.
Yes, but like by a couple of months. Jenna stopped giggling. He bitch every time she says it. Jenna's just a few months younger.
Leah too.
Lea's like no August, yeah, Lea's like less February in August is a big jump.
January, okay, January and.
Okay, even worse.
Diana too. Diana. Isn't Diana your age? Jenna? Yes, April, yeah, okay, all rights, smug, look off your face. I actually think that Amber is also February.
February, so you are okay, all right, fair enough, still still stand young.
Thank God. Okay, tell him, tell us how you.
Got What were you doing in your life? What was happening on in your life when you got the call to audition Berkeley.
I was in the middle of my two hundred hours yoga certification at Yoga to the People, which I think since has been totally canceled in, like you know, there's now going back now. No turns out it was not a great It was not Yoga to the people. It was like yoga yoga for fraud or something. There was something sketchy happening there. But I was, yeah, something I was in my course because I had just done Rock of Ages on Broadway for a couple of years. I did the Trans Siberian Orchestra, which I know Kevin is a huge Mungus fan of my work.
In the did the dance last It's Christmas Stripper. I don't even know, like what you would call that show back then with the flute, you really know it. I know it better than I do.
It's so satisfying because it is like if you could sum up what is the gayest possible move, that's it. I've done gayer things, but I don't feel I feel most gay when doing that dance.
Same, so I was doing that.
I did like a big Christmas tour where we toreed arenas, and then I was like, you know, fuck this business. It's really it's such a grind, and I just don't know how long I can do like the hair flip and the body rolls and all that. So I was really trying to be responsible and like preparing myself for what my future held. There's a slightly more longevity in yoga teaching. I'm not sure by how much, but a little bit, and you still didn't need a college degree, which I didn't have.
So I was.
Doing that and then I got this call from my agent at the time, which was this like really small dance agency in New York. She was like, hey, Glee is casting for the next season and they're looking for a couple new characters and they want to cast out in New York and they wanted to be like actual, true musical theater people. And so I remember being like huck Lee because to all the musical theater people when that show came came out, we were all like posers, You're not a purist, you know.
Wait, yes, hold on, what was the talk because I know none of that.
We hate watched it.
We watched it, but only because you were jealous.
Of course. You know.
It's like young, there's no caddier world than Broadway Theater and Jenna, you know this well, like, yes, it's kind of crazy, how truly we just couldn't celebrate anyone's wins because we were all.
Just so desperate, just fucking desperate.
But even like you had people who have been on Broadway on the show.
They were traders, you know, Jenna and Leah and Matt, Matt and Matt.
Oh yeah, yeah it sold out to TV.
Yeah, I was like, oh god, and you know, so everybody but you know, of course I everyone would drop everything to be on the show if asked, because that's how the world works, and that's how envy works, and that's how you know, we all are. So I get this call and I thought it it was for like a holiday weekend where I was supposed to be going on like some trip with my friends, and I was just so inconvenience that I had to move my train to day later to audition for Glee because I was like, at this point, I had auditioned for so many things during the theater days that I knew a I had never auditioned for anything on television, and I was like, no one's casting me in a TV show.
This just isn't.
First TV audition ever ever, you bitch.
Yeah, And I don't worry. The horseshoe quickly fell out of my ass. But I went to the audition, and I think because I just didn't. I just thought it was so far from reality, and you know, it was the character.
I really liked it.
I had obviously I'm wonderful playing a bitch and life was imitating art a little bit more than you know, I wanted to admit. I just felt like it's fun and I'll do it. And then I had to do it was so weird. You had to do like sixteen bars of a song, like a pop song, and I sang I kissed a girl, not even knowing the show that had been on the show, because I didn't watch the.
Show after the first episode because I was just so pissed that it existed.
And I sang it, I kissed a girl, and then I danced and you had to like do your own choreography or something.
It was like a no, yes, and.
My dance audition made it onto some like DBD like I swear I swear in the world, which is upsetting.
Upset they they learned after casting all of us for three years. They were like, we have to make sure these kids.
Yeah, So I did it and then I got a call back and I still at that point felt like this is so stupid. I'm not getting this job. And then they were like, Okay, you're going to test for the show. And I was like, well, didn't I just go through a test? That are those tests? Is that not a test? And they said a.
Screen test where you have to fly to LA.
They're going to fly you there then to put you up and you're just going to do it in front of all the executives.
But we're going to do your deal.
And so they did our deal and everything was so foreign. It was like being in another country where I didn't speak the language. And I just was moving forward and tell doing what everybody told me to do. So I went to my audition and I saw a girl there that had been I knew her from New York. She had been Her name was Natalie, but I can't remember her last name. She had been on a soap opera. She went from like musical theater to soap opera world, and I thought.
Oh shit, she's going to get this because she just was like already cool, already hot. Shit. So I did my audition.
I did not know who Ryan Murphy was when he was in the room, and he asked me.
So like, do you really dance?
And I said, yeah, I dandy, have you seen these moves? And then I left, and I swear on my mother's life. I my agent called and said how to go, and I said, I think it went really well. And the choreographer asked me if I had really danced, and I was like, he seemed really excited.
I mean hopefully.
I mean he's just the choreographers who knows like how much input he.
It was Ryan Murphy.
And this is why things were easier before the Internet existed, or before it was truly accessible, or before I entered into the world of television. I could not put a face to a name I didn't and truthfully, if someone had said to me that was Ryan Murphy, I don't even know if I would have known how truly important that man was to this show. Like I just was so green, like green is an understatement.
It was just yeah.
So I fly home and I knew that if I got the job that I would have like a week to break my lease in New York and move to LA which I'd never lived in LA before. And I got the call and I was just shocked. My agent was like, it was the best day of her life.
I mean, she's.
Salary a couple.
She was like, this is crazy.
You're going to be on a TV show and kind of like a big character on a TV show. So I packed up all my shit and I left and went to LA and then, like we were saying, I got to a set and I had no idea what I was doing again, and I was. It was the most intimidating experience of my life. And actually watching the episode today, I hadn't watched Glee.
I don't ten years.
It's probably been ten years, and that episode I probably haven't watched since.
It came out.
That year was twenty twelve, I think was season four or at least when we filmed it. But watching it back, I actually have to say that I can't believe how I was able to keep my shit together because I wasn't horrible and I looked like but I'd done it before, kind of I forgot some of the lines I said were so incredibly inappropriate, and this is zero recollection of that. But I yeah, it was so scary, it was so terrifying.
Was your first scene with Jane? Uh huh?
Yep?
For television?
God?
No, Yeah, And.
I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I was such a massive Jane fan. I mean, all the Christopher guest movies I was. I could quote them. So I just thought, this is so amazing. But I'm also the type of person where I would rather not have those opportunities, do you know what I mean.
I think we're all kind of the same in that way. Yeah, I'm like, I don't want to rise to the occasion. I don't want the occasion, Like, let me observe, don't try me.
So I just remember sitting there and they brought out the cast chairs, so you know, between scenes, between setups all that stuff, everybody goes and they sits in their chair, and there was a chair with Jane's name on it, and there was a chair I think it was just Jane.
Oh no, Chris was.
In that scene too, And then they brought out another chair and I just stood there for like thirty minutes, and Jane was like, hey, you can sit down, like you can totally and I'm like, no, no, no, I'm totally fine. And I didn't realize the chair they brought out was for me, like it said cast I didn't have like my Becca Tobin chair yet, but I didn't sit until like six hours in and I.
Thought, okay, well, I guess this is why they have chairs. Like it's a long damn day. She just stood next to the chair.
I stood next to the chair like the most awkward person you've ever seen in your life.
But I will never forget.
Jane was sitting there on her phone and they were like, okay, ready for ready for what do they say, Jesus Christ, We're ready for first Team and Jane goes, hang.
On, I'm more in a ring a tankini.
And I was just like this is so epic, Like I wish I wasn't here because now I have to go on set and like do a scene with her, and I don't want those stakes to be that high. But I also I am so grateful that I'm sitting here just watching Jane Lynch order at.
Tentertaining watching Jane Lynch just be is such a gift.
It was so amazing, and I just and I didn't know what I was doing at all. But it's so weird because you know, by the time you're on a TV show, one would hope that you've had some kind of a lesson in acting in front of a camera. No, but there wasn't, and no one thought to look at my resume and say, hmm, this is strange.
She's only ever performed on the stage with.
Live audiences and never in front of a camera unless it was some like weird. I think I did, like some dance commercials, you know, where I was like a background dancer or something.
But that was it. It was so scary.
Wow.
Did you ever have aspirations of being like on camera or was it just like you went to Amada right? Yeah, so like you were always just like a theater girl.
Just theater straight up.
I just wanted to be in the chorus of every musical and maybe understudy the lead role if it didn't sing too high.
Aspirations were high really for the start.
I never wanted, guys. I never wanted to be a star. Okay, I know it's hard to believe, but I never.
Thought I want to sometimes if you got it, you got it. You can't help it.
Yeah, you got it.
A guess what the choreographer that day aka Ryan Murphy, he saw.
Something, he saw something in me.
Yeah. No, I never wanted to walk a red carpet. I didn't want to do interviews. I'm not complaining. It was I mean, I still hate walking red carpet. It's like the worst thing ever of this whole job. But like you know, it just was weird. It was so it was the whole thing was so weird.
This makes so much sense now, is why we got along and get along. Yeah, it's because I think we have a collective rejection of like this shit is stupid. Yeah, this is all so silly.
Don't need it.
I'm we're we like can't we couldn't buy in, And you have to buy in. You have to buy in at a certain point, you know, drink the kool aid. Drink your own kool aid. I don't think the three of us have ever had a sip of our own kool aid.
Well, I mean maybe maybe a little.
I mean I probably did at some point.
We had like maybe half a cut yea possibly, yes, yes, never once on this show though, No, no, no, no, no, no, it was we never took ourselves seriously on the show.
That's why it's hard to rewatch because I was like, Oh, she wasn't there that day.
I'm talking about me.
I wasn't you committed on this new Rachel episode.
I was here. I was there for it. That's why I said.
You know, a lot of the fans have told this, like season three was one of the best seasons. We loved season three, but I was still very intimidated and there was very much this kind of like rank and so when I was technically like the upper classmen, when you guys came in, it was like we were the leaders and we were kind of the one setting the tone and it was so fun and you guys came in and like fit in right away, and we had like we just had so much fun that it was. It was a different dynamic, not that the original like the first three weren't that, but it was just different.
Yeah, but we were still very much learning on the job, Like you said that, Yeah, when you came on, and I think now having like people to like shepherd in and show the ropes, it made us feel more secure and like oh, we know what we're doing. Yeah, oh, we got this. And I was just saying to Jenna about the new racial episode where there's something in like her performance that feels more mature or grown and more confident, like she has a presence that she did not have the first three seasons. Yeah, and I think maybe part of that is that there's new kids here and to sort of be the leaders of this.
Yeah, yeah, it's true. Yeah, Tina was very confident in the new Rachel. I loved it. She's pretty different. She's doing something.
She has she's lived a little bit. Now, what what was your contract? Like, uh, this is wild.
So it was a guaranteed six episode guest star.
So it was a recurring guest star. Wow.
So it was like our trial. They wanted to make sure that they didn't cast the wrong people.
Right, Yeah, they did. They caught it later.
They caught it too late though, and they gave us that And I remember my agent explaining to me that if you know, like it could go on, because you know, you do the test deal, so like they say, potentially you could be doing seven season this. So we're going to set it up so that you that's what we're prepared for so it was like this weird. We knew we were auditioning for more, and I just thought, why am I moving across the country and breaking my lease and doing all these things? If I could just I could potentially only be doing six episodes of a twenty two season show and then like never come back again. So what sucked about that experience was that every after episode six, every single week that the new scripts would come out, we would just see if our names were in them. So every for twenty two episodes, we just waited and waited.
And there was one in there that I was not in, and I was like, this is it, this is it. It's over, Like it's over before it even began.
And I just remember that when we got our I think we did season four, and then we were at our photo shoot for season five and we still hadn't been told that our contracts were being executed.
So I was playing I was at the photo shoot.
We were shooting all the you know, that was like the season that we were on, like in those boxes, so like me and Blake and Jacob and Melissa, and we're just sitting there being like, this is so weird. No one has even told us that we're part of next season and we were going to be series regulars if we were going back, but we still didn't know that. And I remember I went to the bathroom because my manager Ricky had called me. Went to the bathroom and I answered, He's like, I have great news, two really exciting things. That was the first and last time that I've ever gotten that call from him, and he said, I you're getting picked up for season five. I was like, well, obviously, I'm at the fucking photo shoot. And then he said, and You've been nominated for a Teen Choice Award for Best Villain. And I remember sitting on the toilet and I was like, you know what I'm in.
I'm in. I'm That was it.
I love that in a year, you went from I've never been on TV, don't really care about doing it to being nominated for Choice to work for Best Village while you're well when.
She drank the kool aid.
That was I remember walking out of that bathroom a different woman. Watch Out World, Watch Out, I'm a surfboard might be in my future.
There was also you all like all the new kids kids, even though you're my elder Shut up, Grandma.
I was twenty six. That was like a grown woman.
Yeah, I can't wait to be twenty six. Shut up, hey, but you were also respectful because like you weren't like why would you come onto the show with us old hags and like talk about those things, Like people didn't talk about money. And there's also not this you know now you go on and make sure like the leading female characters make the same amount of money as the leading male characters. Like there was not this vocabulary or openness about these things. And it took almost until the end of season four when we were on and I thought we were all we were all close, we all bonded hard, but still that's like a weird work thing that you don't really like breach, you don't.
It.
And there was one day I even remember like the look in your eyes of like you brought up I think maybe all the new kids were talking about it, and we were also on stage and you know us, we're nosy as hell, and the secrets and be like, hey, so what you're talking about? And then you're like, all right, well, if you want to know, we've averaged the amount of money we're making, we've been working and it's just a little better than minimum.
Just slightly, Like we all would have made more money putting in those hours.
At Starbucks, right, Like it was. That was the craziest part.
I'm so grateful that I wasn't resentful of that fact at all, because I was just so grateful I was still making way more than I was in theater, even that I was working my ass off. But at that time, I didn't care about working my ass off. I didn't have anything to like go home to or do it outside of this job, and like we were each other's social lives. So I was like, I'm not complaining, but this is fucking wild because I don't know how much those assholes are making.
Yeah, and we're working the same amount of.
Hours, which I think was helpful because I think we were Also we had become family and we're like, okay.
That's complete crazy.
Yeah, And we've seen it happened with Cord where they kept Cord on for two seasons as a guest star and really.
Yes, yeah, this season was the first season that he was a series regular.
Okay, I kind of do, I kind of do remember that, yeah, but I didn't know he did two seasons of a guest star that's rough.
I mean because there were so many of us. The show was so a lot of times when you have these shows, the thing that becomes most expensive if the show is successful.
Is the cast. Yeah, soo many people, but we.
Were not the most. Ever, the most expensive part of that show. That's great. The music, the sets, it was just a gigantic yeah undertaking.
I think you know someone I wish I could remember who from the crew, maybe Joey. I'm so mad at myself, but I remember when we got our season where we became series regulars, he kind of gave us this like cautionary tale of having worked on other shows before with people who got their big break and then eventually were broke. And so he's like, yes, don't buy a flashy car, just get some crazy like apartment with this high rent, like all of these things. And I will never forget that moment because I was like I was fifty percent of me was like, not going to be me. I'm just going to keep rolling in this monopoly money. And then fifty percent of me was like, he probably is something he's been around, he knows, you know, something I don't know, And I just won't forget it because like, yes, I mean it is. It's so wild to make that much money so young, and then most of us kind of stopped working for a long time, like long, like longer than average.
That's a whole other conversation.
Oh god, it's a whole other conversation. I agree with you.
Michael Melly was the one who told us early on. He said, don't spend your money. Yeah, invest in real estate and get out, Like that's it. He's like, just be nice to people, get some real estate and like save your money.
Yeah, which is so true. I mean I listened sort of, but like it's hard. It's so hard. And I remember, did you guys have an experience with so we were kind of what the year social media Instagram started was the year I started the show.
It was still like a baby platform. It wasn't this big thing.
I remember the show ended and it was probably within the next six months anything I did on the internet or social media, there was a slew of people telling me I was no longer relevant. And this was like six six months after the show ended, And I remember those people put like a hex on me, and I remember thinking, they're right, it's been six months, Like where is my next hit show, like this crazy expectation, and I'm like, that's what's wild is that I now, if it had been six months since then, like with everything that I know, it wouldn't have even penetrated my psyche.
But it s fucked me up so.
Hard that I swear it was like a curse that was put on me where I was like, you've gotten your own way totally. I was like, they're right, I'm so irrelevant. I'm so irrelevant. I haven't been on TV in six months, and it's like, wow, they should have really find me now, you know what I mean. This is a level of irrelevance that I can't even quite describe.
Yeah, oh yeah, they think they can attack us online with those lines like guys, we've said way worse about ourselves to ourselves, Like there's nothing you can possibly say that will make us feel more relevant than we make ourselves feel daily.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's it's a gift. It's quite the gift. I was talking to my friend today who she grew up on a TV show and hasn't worked in a while, and because she's like everyone associates me with being just like nineteen year old daughter on this TV show and I go, yeah, And for most of us, everyone associates us so hard with these characters unless we're being hired by people who have previously hired us. Yeah, mine is like Harry or doing theater things. Yeah, no one's really like outside of the Ryan Murphew world or outside like no one has done that much. But there is a weird thing where like think fuck like Heather is.
It was like almost better than not not quite as good, but like almost as good as if it was me doing it. And I can genuinely say that, yes I am. I am a jealous bitch, but for some reason, when it comes to us, I am like I will not I will not die until I see all of us back doing something that we love, you know what I mean. It's like a weird It's like this weird thing. So when Heather that was announced, and even like with Harry, it's been a couple of years, but I remember the beginning of Harry's like resurgence, I just thought saying, God, you know, it was like this.
Weird stupid curse.
Like I'm saying, it's like yes, and it's so it's so bizarre. I just had a meeting in La in the last year and talking, you know, those general meetings where you're with an executive who's running a studio, And you know, I hadn't done that in ten years since, or maybe a little bit less than that, like since the show ended. I hadn't sat in front of an executive to be like, hey, what's going on?
Blah blah blah. Yeah.
And she was talking to me about some pilots that are coming out, and she was like, oh, you know, there is this pilot. But you know, I just think it's like a you fall between the cracks of like age, you know, it's like moms and then it's like twenties. And I was like, hello him, I'm a mother. I'm a I'm a fucking mother. I am thirty eight years old. Can we can we accept and embrace this fact? But it's so hard for people to see that we are grown ups now, Like we all look too young.
We look we're in no man's land of ages, which a nice thing to hear. It is for like personal life great, like yes, I'm rotted on the inside.
Somebody said to you though, that because we remind them of a long, long, long time ago, then we make them feel old.
I think that about you two, Not that you make people feel old, but I think you guys's faces are synonymous with and your voices and all those things are like with that you like with that show, you know. I think the reason that some people, I mean, listen, she's so talented, but like I think Melissa has worked so much because she didn't really, like we weren't there long enough for people to associate our faces and our likeness with the show. So I think, like I have no excuses what I'm saying.
No, no, no, I.
Mean Alex has also crushed.
Crushed, crushed, So maybe it's not a pattern. It's just me and Jacob, Me and Jacob, It's just us. It's a hard thing. It's also because it.
Was such a juggernaut it was, and it was such a big piece that it's hard to separate. Like you look at other shows and you're like, oh, well, of course, like that's blah blah blah from that show. They will always follow you. But how do you break the mold or have fun somebody who's willing to take a chance on you to break that mold or approve them.
I also think it's like a uniquely American like TV thing. Yeah, yes, we're like Alex wanted to do theater. Alex fucked off to New York and like really like found the thing that was going to like and I fought for that and then also put out all these songs and was just like doing everything and carved out an entire lane. Yeah, where I think in the TV world in America they just want to type cast all the time and need everyone to like have a break from us. Yeah, And so then you get into the you are so out of sight and so out of mind and pie design.
Yeah, putting you in this box and.
You're going to live in this box.
For for us, it's like you're going to play a fun game how can you pay your mortgage until we take you out of your box. But we're not going to tell you when your box is being taken out.
So like I went off to London as soon as the show was done because I was like, I need a break. Because also, when you're in this thing, we're getting offers every single year during the season to do things, and we don't necessarily have time to do those things or allow to do those things, but we were all getting offers constantly, and so it feels like when you're used to that, that's just how things are going to be. And I went off to England for like a year, was so happy to like have something else to do. But when I came back, I was like, wait, I think I fucked up. Yeah, I think I was gone too long. No, not long enough.
No, I just I just think it's like this weird like it's a blessing.
It's a blessing and a curse.
You know. There's people's careers that I look at and I think it would have been really interesting to have had baby steps in this business and start on like indies and start on smaller shows or smart you know, like that trajectory, and then by the time you get your quote big break, I think it's easier.
It's you usually can sustain a little bit.
Like it's like the fifteen minutes of fame thing happens so often with like those teen shows. Also, you know, I think if the show had been some adult show, it would be different. Also because it's such a weird fan base. It's such a devoted fan base. But they're very young, so they're not going to put you on another show with that demographic, or maybe they will, but they weren't casting any of us, and then they're not going to put you on like an adult show because they're like, well, none of the fans are going to follow because it's too their children still are seen as children. So it's just this weird. And also watching back, watching the show for the first time in such a long time, it is the tone of the show was so specific, like they're really hasn't been since or before a show in the same tone. And that is hard as an actor too, because then you go into audition for things and if you so much as sprinkle in that tone, they're like, nope, it's so Glee.
It's so Glee.
Yes, and we and they did start to write, you know, our characters more similar to who we are as people. So when you do go into other auditions like well, this is me. Everything's going to be infected by Artie because that's just me. Yeah, it's something I guess that's already. I'm like, well, why do you think Artie did that? Like I did that.
It's so weird.
It's so weird, and we're just complaining and I feel bad complaining.
But it's also just been it's the real talk a lot to.
Unpack, Like it's just been the last went to the show end twenty fifteen.
Yeah, nine years.
Yes, Yeah, it's a lot to unpack, and there's been a lot of time to like step away from it, and then with the pandemic and everything, there's just a lot of things that life happened.
Yeah.
When we talk on the show now and the way that Ryan set like the tone for it, it's like we're not complaining, we're just unloading.
I honestly think the three of us are all very secure and like the job doesn't define us or it's something that we love to do. We like we would love to be acting constantly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, But at the same time, it's like we're pretty well balanced, normal people in comparison to a lot of people in this business. Yeah, it's like we're fine, But at the same time, it's like these are the realities, and like we have a lot of friends who are also in this position. And I think at this age as well, like what you were talking about with Becca, like I don't really get jealous of other people because I like there's so much room for everybody to have success. Yeah, I just want somebody to have it, Like anytime anyone in our group like I'm ecstatic, like, are you kidding me?
Go for it.
There was zero percent jealousy or envy. It's like, get everyone out there. Everyone is so talented. And I think the beauty of what Ryan and co. Can do is see that in us, put us like maybe we wouldn't have gotten hired on another.
Show, guaranteed that I will.
Yeah, yeah, and so like same and so like it was nice that he saw that, saw that, and like Robert, they put us together somehow. Yeah, and maybe we're just a little specific taste. Yeah, you know, totally.
So you did work on another TV show after that with one of your Glee members, with one of our Glee crew people's turn on who oh, oh my god, just like this what did I do?
Honestly, it was during the pandemic like dead in like dead Center twenty twenty.
Like I just at the t was such a weird I can't even work during that time.
It was so weird.
When you are so overloaded with information at certain times in your life like this, when you're filming a TV show during a pandemic COVID and you're just trying to like get through the memories are not.
Yeah that's hard.
No, they're not there because every day you're just trying to survive.
It was just make it your day. It was such a weird experience. What was the show like?
You know, the COVID aside, right, which I'm sure added a fabulous flavor layer. What was it like after working on the machine and then going to a different TV show?
You know, I was glad that between Glee and Turner and Hooch, I had done like a couple guest stars here and there, and then a couple homework movies in the mix. Like, I was glad that I didn't get super rusty and I'd like been on sets in the last year or two, but I still felt well. To be perfectly honest, I didn't realize how special Glee was until working on another show. And not to say that other show wasn't a wonderful experience. And I I loved everyone. I mean, Josh Peck was the lead of that show, and I still think that he is like one of the greatest people that I've ever worked with as far as like how present he is, how there he is for other cast members, how like he's number one on the call sheet. There's never a single complaint that ever left the guy's mouth. He's always happy to see everybody, like in a stressful time.
Like I still I do love it.
But you know, when I was watching Glee today and when I had that experience, I have the exact same feeling where I'm so I'm so sad that that experience had an expiration date, like just specifically Glee. It's just there, you know, it's like one of those once in a lifetime And you know, I think when we were shooting the show, no, I know, when we were shooting the show, I thought, you have to soak every moment of this in because I knew nothing about the business and how it worked.
I knew nothing about anything.
But I did know, like weirdly in my subconscious that this experience would never be duplicated or anything would ever come close. And so like now when I do shows, it's just different.
It's fine. I'm so grateful.
I love working, I love acting, I love being creative, but all that other stuff is missing, that other magic, you know. So and again, it was the middle of pandemic. We couldn't be that social, So who's to say that it couldn't have been so similar experience, and we only had one season, so I didn't have the time to like really get to know each other.
But that's the thing. It's just so it's just crazy.
To watch that episode of Glee because I stayed away from it for so long because it is sort of this it makes me sad like it.
I remember at one point Leah.
Asked me if I had watched because she had gone back and like started to watch some old episodes, and I was like, I can't do it, Like I just I don't know why. I just couldn't do it, And now I know exactly why, because it's just so bittersweet, Like I it's grief.
It's full on grief.
Yeah, in so many ways, in like a million fucking ways. But I'm grateful for it, Like I would never change it. It's an experience like that. I know for the rest of my life, not much will compare in that space, career space at least for sure. For sure it doesn't happen like that on the set of Hallmark Movies.
If you can do it, I felt really crowd of the show. The other day, another conversation with another friend about how the theater I've never done theater. You both have, but the bond you get from doing theater because you all have to have some sort of cohesion relationship in connection to like make the show happen every single night. Ye, Like it's just you guys on that stage getting through it. And he was saying from the TV he's done. He doesn't ever get he's never gotten that feeling. And I was like, who is this a friend of mine? He's on two different TV shows right now, but he's not a regular on either.
I think he's a record on both. Yeah, and the feeling and they from theater on TV.
Yes, that's familial connection of all. And I was thinking in my head, how I've had the complete opposite experience. Yeah, And one of those reminders because the crew would tell us too about like how unique and special our experience was, but we just we had no compared to Yeah. And it was another one like here I am nine years later talking to a friend of mine and to silently sitting there being like, Wow, that's like this guy works all the time and you've never felt that, And like I felt nothing but that, like there was no.
Like there moved together. Basically you shared dressing rooms.
In every week to have there so many seasons together, yeah, exactly, Like that is also such a gift. And also shows nowadays are eight to twelve episodes, yeah for a season, and we were doing twenty two every single year for nine and a half months out of the year, and so we had to bond. And I think we grew up around stories of like salacious tabloid stories about leads of shows not getting along and how horrible that is, and hearing from the crew how horrible that is, and we never any fracture, Like as the show went on, when they're started to be maybe a little unraveling, Yeah, we all just banded together to be like, let's straighten this shit out.
Yeah, because we're not true. There is like a true mob mentality with Glee. Like it's the type of thing where I'm like, I can talk shit about my family, I can say whatever I want, but the moment that you say a fucking word, if you weren't part of that family, you shut your damn mouth.
Like you It's a weird.
Thing and a weird loyalty that I will forever have. And it's like, if you weren't in those four walls or sometimes three walls of that stage, Like, shut your fucking mouth.
You don't know a thing.
And if you were there, and you weren't there for long and you had a snippet of that experience, you also don't know a thing.
So it's this sacred.
Place and it's been It's such a hard thing to maintain, too, because everywhere you go, if people are like, oh, you're on Glee, tell me how they just and I'm like, it's then your business, it's none of your business, and it's just a weird thing.
And I'm like, yeah, it's like that, you know. No.
I think that is the disconnection that is a huge, I think public disconnection between if we and the perception if we are being critical of certain experiences on the show, that in no way a translates into that we did not love the show, love being on the show, and love everyone on the show. Yeah, and like you said, I can talk shit about my family, but you can't. Yeah, so you can try, but like you're you're not talking about the same thing, right, you have no idea. No, you weren't there, and that's fine, but you need to recognize that you weren't there. You weren't there, and like just because I'm being if I'm talking critical about like Jenna, wasn't saying this one day. But don't you dare.
Fucking say a bad thing about Jenna because I wouldn't cut your head off.
So true.
Yeah, it's it's really, it's so it's something that like I don't think we'll ever like I said, it's not gonna be duplicated, but I'm just glad it is what it is.
Kevin and I realized that we don't remember anything from the show. We have zero memory from the show. But I'm curious if there's like moments or parts of the show or days on set that like stick out in your mind.
I had such vivid memories of that time. It's so weird because.
It was like how we think about the first season. We remember everything. Yes, this was your first season, this is.
My first I remember so many things.
It was like, I yeah, like anything in particular, I mean aside from this first scene with Jane where it's just like, I mean, I blacked out, But I also remember every detail kind of thing.
Where it's just panic.
Yeah, that season in particular, we were spending so much time together like socially on and off screen, that there were often those five am call times and we were like walking in our doors at two am the night before because we'd been out like partying together. Yes, that's so many hungover mornings, so many.
I mean, I I think it was our group of friends that there was a point where I was like, I can't drink before we go to work anymore because I feel awful, Like I feel really bad and I just like don't look good and I'm not my best I like had to cut it off and was like I can't.
I remember, we like would leave for lunch, and even though we had like from from door to door, it was a true hour, there's no wiggle room, but we just refused to stay on the lot to eat lunch together. We would go to Larchmont and just shovel sushi in our mouths or like it was just and we would all go together, like it was just such a thing. We all went together, and some days I would decide to leave my cheerleading skirt on and put sweats underneath, and then we're walking around Larchmont and people are like, oh my god, it's the fucking gleek ass, Like do you remember how funny that used to be. We would just be walking now around in the world with my ugly fucking ponytail and you couldn't take the pony out. That pony was glued to my head and like, oh, I had my one of my like many uniforms because it was, like, you know, the only thing I ever wore on the show for three years, and I at the end of the show, I took one and I put it in a shadow box for my dad, and next to it is my press shot from like that first season of me in my cheerios outfit in my slick back ponytail. It's at my parents' house and my son, who's two, was playing in the room that it's in and he suddenly like looked up at it, that at it, and he was like.
Oh my god, mama. I was like, yeah, it's mama, and then he goes, I don't like it. I don't like it.
No, no, no, no.
He hates it. He hates it. Every day we'd go I don't like it. I don't like it.
I was like, whoa, I don't like it. I didn't be more honest. I just remember screening the episodes during those days at lunch. I remember it was the first time anybody had ever commented on the way that I looked. I remember somebody saying that I looked like a housewife in a Halloween costume.
I remember.
I remember that was my first taste of being criticized and seeing it like it was just so other than like one weirdo who saw Rock of Ages on Broadway and was upset that I didn't climb up the stripper pole as high as the girl who did the part.
Originally.
That was like the only level of like weird bullying I'd ever experienced.
Sorry, I just expe of you.
He just expected more, so did you? And apparently you didn't like the way I looked in that costume. But wow, Yeah, I just remember sorting out all of those like weird experiences and having our premiere party, and I remember walking into like our season four premiere party on the lot and looking around my face was like they'd made cloths with our faces on them, statues framed everything. Like I just it was such a weird experience, like to walk on a red carpet and to talk about the show, and then to walk into this party where your face is plastered everywhere and everyone there knows who you are, and it's just like, yeah, so bizarre.
That's bokers because like when we first started, there was obviously a huge lag, like we shot, we shot the pilot, and the pilot aired like six seven months later, and then there was still another six five months until the show really started airing, and so started you it. Yeah, it was like probably six weeks from when you got the call to you showing up at that premiere party and your face is plastered over everything and your life has changed overnight.
So weird. It was so strange.
And also that was such a weird, like season where it was the first season Lee.
I was in New York, Dean Geyer.
I had forgotten, like I'd totally forgotten that he came on as like the new hot guy.
Do you remember meeting us for the first time?
Oh my gosh, I don't I remember meeting you. I think did we meet the hair and makeup trailer for the first time?
Yeah? You were?
You give me the should I did? I was just scared out of my mind. I do this.
I have a bad Okay, so this is this is exactly. I don't remember it, but I do remember it, but I don't remember what I was thinking in the moment, but knowing myself, I know that I was so scared out of my mind, like terrified, and I know that I didn't.
You guys were so famous.
You were so famous at the time that I was like, if I'm too friendly, they're going to be like, get this.
Fan girl off the set, you know. So I was like, you gotta be cool.
You've got to be don't be an idiot, just be cool, okay, normal and be cool. So I'm just sitting there and I'm trying to be and so that's how it comes off like I'm.
Just I've worked on my years.
I bet that was like peak bitchy Becca, when really what's going on inside is that I'm trying to like stay cool.
Yes, well, my own personal thing is like I don't reach out to people. It's hard for me to either like lend the arm, you know, like the olar Brench and so I'm like, I'm not go to say hi and like be nice and be like we have a mutual friend.
She's like, oh that's cool. Oh my god, I'm such an asshole. Funny it didn't because I feel like we had it on quickly.
Oh yeah, it was so fast. After that it was like great, I remember Meghan. Meghan's first impression of me is like the funniest ever, because she's just such a funny person. But it's something like she goes, I was sitting at base camp and I heard the new kids were coming on set, and that's the time she was. She's like, you know, just sniffering around, seeing what's going on.
She goes.
And then I see this another blonde bitch in short shorts.
Exactly right here she comes here, she goes.
I remember one of the first times we hung out after Jenna like sent me the text me, we need to like make sure we're we take care of Becca because like she's BFS with Dante and I remember, you guys were hanging out in somebody's trailer, and that happened like quite a bit, like every day. It was like you guys were together in somebody's trailer, and so then I would come and like peek in. You guys just be like giggling and talking shit and and like we were like getting you up to speed on like the hot goss that was going around. Of course, very immediately it's like, oh she's good people, Like she gets it. Yeah, speaking the same language we were.
And I remember, like in the very very beginning, before anybody really talked to us, me and Melissa would go and off and do stuff. We'd get coffees together, we'd have lunch together, and I just remember her and I like sitting in what's the place in Los Phelis.
It's like the.
Weird coffee shop that's kind of dark corners and caves intelligensia.
No, well, I.
Know what you're talking about.
It's probably not there anymore. But it was such a weird place.
But I remember us sitting there like whispering to each other, being like because we were so afraid somebody would know whatever. We both had just moved to La from New York, and we would just be like, this is the weirdest experience of my life, Like.
These people are so crazy, Like are we gonna make it? Are we going to be okay? It's so intense, I don't know.
Like we were just so.
Scared, and it was just such a weird though.
And you also got thrown to the deep end. It wasn't like you came in and had a line. No, like you both all the new people, especially in this first episode. I have a good amount of story.
Yeah it was.
Yeah, mine was probably the least of him. But because I didn't join my glee club the beginning of that season, my character didn't, and so I actually had a little more time to ease into it because I can't even imagine what Melissa had to think about in Jacob, because I didn't have to go in the recording studio or dance rehearsals in that first couple episodes because I wasn't in the glee club yet. But I remember going into the recording studio and I was like, how am I going to do this? I don't know how, Like I don't know how to sing in a recording studio. This is the weirdest, most intimidating thing ever. And I remember the producers Alex right, I remember just being like trying to pretend I knew what I was doing. And you know, I think now, like in hindsight, it's always that when people give advice and stuff, like if people come on the Lady Gang podcast and it's like boss Ladies or like, you know, people who have gotten to be really successful in business, they give the advice that if you don't know what you're doing, just ask for help or like ask for specific directions or information. But I'm like, you couldn't. I mean, I'd like to say that I could have done that in that moment, but I'm like, but you really couldn't. It was just die jump in the deep end, pretend you know what you're doing. Like I couldn't have looked at walking in the day of my first scene and been like, Hi, what's a mark?
Yeah?
Right.
There wasn't really any time allotted to discovering anything.
No, I would get like this the song sent to me, and they're like, you're going to be picked up at lunch in thirty minutes and you're going to go recording in the studio, And I just thought, well, I guess it's a now or never. It's just going to be doing terrifying.
Which I think is also helpful in a way of word, because there was so little time. You didn't have time to think about it or think. You just had to do it, and like, I just have to trust that this machine is going to make it work with me, yes, somehow, because.
It has and it always did.
I had to go in since Glee, I had to do I did an episode of Zoe's extraordinary playlist and I had to sing in it, and I remember them being like, you've done this before, like you just this is a song you're singing and you're gonna go record on this day or whatever.
And I was a nervous wreck.
I was so bad in there, and the producer was like, didn't you do this for like years.
I would have been the same way though.
I practically overdosed on beta blockers because I was so nervous, and I just thought, what is wrong with you?
I know, tell me hapout it.
This is what it is, because when you come off of something whatever, it is like we're coming off a musical TV show. So when we walk into an audition or a job, people have an expectation for us because like, we did it seemingly at the highest level for a very long time, right, but we know how we feel about ourselves. Yeah, and we're like, wait, no, no, you need to adjust your expectations so low, because the difference is like we were idiots and allowed to fail in front of like our family. Yeah, like in front of Alex has heard me sound so bad, but I knew he would get me to the place I needed to get to, and like sweeten it up a little bit afterwards, and so that's what I have bombed every I performed with Jenna the other day on stage and forgot all the lyrics in front of an audience.
There was very charming and you were in the front of the right audience to do it. People love when people fuck up.
I love when people fuck up, but I get it.
But like the expectation is like there, I was in a room full of like musical theater professionals, and I'm like, I can't hang with this group, and so you psych yourself out of it. Happened my one of my first auditions after Glee, Like during Glee, I went into the audition and they looked at me with like this knowing look, like oh it was the first time I was treated differently in an audition room, and it freaked me the fuck out. Yep, because well, now you think I'm going to be good, Oh yeah, just because I know how to do this one thing and even at that mediocre it's true, and there's like a lot of help in editing. That's it's like the expectation of it.
Is like it is, That's what it is. I call it.
Whenever I have to do like an audition where I sing, which is so not often anymore. I'm always like it's kiddy wild unplugged. You know, it's like not what she should never she should never do, like her acoustics side, but like unfortunately sometimes it calls for that moment and is really so humbling.
It is so humbling, Yeah, sure is.
But you know it's also why I'm so non judgmental of anybody really in this business, because we it's so hard. You can't be a master of it all all the time. So you know, it's like Jenna and I have this, me more so than Jenna. I think Jenna has been like you've you're less rusty, like you kind of continued and then you did waitress, like you you worked those muscles more. But like right now, if someone were to call me and be like, hey, you're playing roxy Heart in Chicago, I'd be like, I don't know how to do that, Like I don't know how, and I wouldn't and I would suck and I would have to practice so hard. I'm not saying that was a bad example, but like to do theater in general, I used to be like pretty wonderful at it. I wasn't like a fucking Broadway star, but like I was. That was my muscle that I was working all the time. And then it's like, so it's just having to like become an expert and like a master at all these little niches in the business.
It's so hard.
So when you see people who can really do it all like with very like to make it seem so effortless, I'm like, what is that even like I have to try and.
Work so hard. I have a couple of questions before we let you go about Glee. I want to know your favorite number that you did on the show.
The one I loved wide away. You know, Kevin just watched That's good. It's so good and we didn't have to dance. It was.
I just remember feeling so like moved by that version version, Like I just the arrangement. It was so pretty, and I was I think that was that season five or six.
I wasn't six. I think it was five. It might even late four, but it was late. Yeah.
I just remember I feel really confident, finally feeling like I had found my footing. And then we did something where was it Diva? Were we were we in like crazy dress gowns. That was such a fun day just because we could be together and like prance around and I got out of my cheerio uniform for like the one time every five days or five episodes. They'd be like you four minutes, you're out of your your uniform. I really soak that ship in. Yeah, do you guys? Do you guys often think of the fact that uh Phineas was on Glee.
Yes, we talk about it.
I just heard him on an interview and I was like, I can't lace this. I can't in my mind, that's not the same person who did Glee.
Like very strange.
It's it's so strange. It's like he was like it was like it was such a right. It was so weird, alternate universe. It was like he was possessed for like a year and was on set and spoke to work.
Truly, I think he spoke to you.
It was like an accident, like you shouldn't be here.
It was like a glitch in the matrix. And they were like, wait a second, he's not mediocre. He doesn't belong in this cast.
He was like maybe I'll oh, no, this is not what I want to do.
Not it not It the universe.
Knew like at least someone's being protected, but it was really that was such a weird thing. We've had like weird people come in and out, and I just remember feeling like it was the Hunger Games and I just had to hold on for dear life.
I couldn't screw up. I was like, just.
Don't look at Ryan wrong, Just don't say the wrong thing. Just be like under the radar just enough. Don't be a crazy bitch, like just be Although that probably would have gotten me more stream time, I just I just was like so yeah, like I just every day that went by that I still had a job on that side, it was just the best best day ever.
So you know, it was a it was a time.
Occasionally I hear like myself in like a TJ Max over the speaker, and I think, I don't even know who that person is, But what a joy?
What a joy with that? What is the feeling that glee leaves you with?
Oh my gosh, honestly, like joy, like joy and laughter, Like it's so strange for all the darkness and all the weirdness that has followed, like it's just still if I go back and like today being forced to watch that episode, I was transported to a time that I was. That was the beginning of a chapter of my life that I had was filled with so much joy. For the most part. You know, there were some hiccups, if you will, but yeah, like it's just yeah joy. So I'm so cheesy and I'll go kick myself in the face.
Do you think you've broken the seal now a little bit? Do you think you'll watch anymore?
No? I don't think in the future, no, because I'll be like I doesn't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. No, probably not. I don't know.
He might when I'm old and wrinkly, but by that point I'm going to look even younger than I did. Exactly have surgeries. I'm gonna have and just yeah.
Whenever you schedule one to do two for one and I'll show up.
Oh I will, I will.
I was actually watching it and I was like, God, that is like a different face. I don't even know that face anymore, exact same. You know, there is some alterations done, but you know, for the most part.
You're collagen back then, just so much. Every episode of Like So Smooth, I wish I had. Yeah, I was taking them for granted. It's okay.
Sorry, I think you both look better now.
I do very nice. I think we all do. I think that was like an awkward time. It was also before it was.
A weird like in between phase of our faces. So a great, I'm happy with how gorgeous we are now, and now we're all going to go work on other TV shows and just show our gorgeous faces to America again and be like I'm relevant again.
Bitches.
The Leah had about after Spring Awakening, she and John would show up places and they would pretend to be on the poster Spring Awakening to like try to get free things like remember this and take we took our like Glee pictures with the l's over fores. Yes, yes, And she'd always joke about like, well that's going to be us one day, being like remember that, we get that for free, and now we'll go into audition rooms and here we are.
Here we are wheelchair if you want, I can leave it in the car.
I still can't shake that reality that you spent seven or six years in a wheelchair.
I just can't shake it. Weird times, weird time time.
Becha thank you so much for spending an hour with us and talking about all the joy, the joy and the laughter, the joy and the laughter.
All right, I love you guys so much. I love the gleek. I am the gleek of the week.
And thank you so much.
I love you, love you, thanks seriously for doing this.
Thank you.
Well there you have a kid's you heard it from her mouth.
It was joyful.
I just love that we could talk about anything with her. There's nothing off.
It's true, and she's very honest and forthcoming about all of it.
That's something I love about her. You don't really get like a sugarcoat with her.
She's got one speed and it's real.
That is very true.
We love back up. We're so grateful. Thank you about her for coming on in all of your not free time to chat with us. Buckley and I hope you guys enjoyed the beginning of season.
Four and go listen to the Lady Gang wherever you listen to your podcasts, and that's what you really missed. Thanks for listening, and follow us on Instagram at and that's what you really miss pod. Make sure to write us a review and leave us five stars. See you next time
