A Love Language Minute draws from Dr. Gary Chapman's years of counseling experience, excerpts from his live events, and his answers to listeners' questions to give encouragement and practical help and hope for the relationships in your life.
What does love look like in a marriage? Turn to I Corinthians 13:4-7 to see how God describes love!
If you feel you're emotionally unstable, it may be due to living in a loveless and dysfunctional family. As an adult, seek out a counselor that is trained to provide help in this area.
Some people think that physical intimacy before marriage is acceptable because marriage is "just a formality". Marriage isn't just a formality, it's a public declaration of the covenant you're making. Statistics bear out that those who have sex before marriage are far more likely to divorce.
Love is not a feeling. It's a way of life. It's a choice you make in how to express it.
You as a parent need to acknowledge that you cannot control your adult children, but you can influence them in a positive way.
What is love? Some might think it's the feeling you have when you're "in love". But those feelings are temporary. True love is an attitude and action. Read I Corinthians 13:4-7 to see how the Bible defines love.
Is divorce biblical? Scripture never condones divorce; but God allows it when infidelity or abandonment is involved. If you're divorced, confess your part in that divorce, and seek God's guidance for your future.
Do you and your spouse have differing views about the Christian faith? Marriage has to do with oneness; so share your views with each other and try to understand each other's perspective.
If someone were to ask you, "Why do you want to get married", how would you respond? People often say it's because we're "in love". But that kind of love is feelings-based rather than a committed action-based love.
How do you go about encouraging a family member who's discouraged by all the negativity in the world? Help them gain a new perspective on life by showing them that God is in control, and His purposes will always be good.
Apologies are a necessity. Admit that you need to apologize, then express your apology and admit that your behavior was wrong. Most of the time, a sincere apology will result in the other person forgiving you.
Having a bad relationship with your father can result in negative consequences in your marriage. Reach out to your father and seek to build (or rebuild) the relationship.
It's difficult to love other people when they always disappoint or hurt you. There's always going to be pain and hurt in every relationship because we're imperfect. When you've been hurt, seek out the offender and make a sincere attempt to reconcile.
The two most important sentences you'll ever learn are, "I made a mistake", and "I was wrong". Healthy families don't require perfection, but they do require the willingness to admit when they do wrong.
How do you create a healthy climate of communication in your marriage? Develop the skill of listening to each other.
When we do something wrong, we tend to place blame on someone or something else. It's critical that adults and children learn to take responsibility for what they have done and say, "I'm sorry".
When should children begin reading the Five Love Languages? Dr. Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages of Children was actually written for parents. This book will help the parents learn the concepts and apply them to their children.
As a parent, you can be certain that you've made mistakes in your past that you hope your children will never repeat. Be honest with your children and explain to them the consequences of those mistakes.
True greatness is found in serving others. Jesus is the ultimate example of servanthood.
Is uncontrolled anger a problem in your marriage? Proverbs 29:11 says, "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
Is there a certified course of study for the 5 Love Languages that would help assist teachers to instruct people on its principles? Dr. Gary Chapman says that currently there isn't a certified course, but there are plenty of resources available to assist in teaching the 5 Love Languages principles.
Fighting in a marriage is never appropriate if it involves physical violence. But it's healthy to talk about things on which spouses disagree.
If your spouse sins against you, it's time to get angry. God, too, is angry when people sin. But the purpose for anger, under control, is to motivate us to lovingly confront. Sitting idly by and making no effort to help your spouse turn from their sin will never work.
Reconnecting with a former girlfriend is dangerous. It often leads to marital division and conflict. Scripture tells us to cleave to our wives.
Don't just focus on your desire to climb the corporate ladder to success at the expense of your marriage. Be sure that you prioritize the success of your spouse as well.
Everyone wants someone to be their soul mate, but there's no guarantee that a soul mate will always make us happy. We must understand that love is an action, not a feeling.
Just because the husband is the spiritual leader of the home doesn't necessarily mean he should lead in every aspect of the marriage. If the wife is a better financial manager, give her the freedom to use her strengths for the good of your family! After all, God gave the husband a wife to be his helpmate.
Which season best describes your marriage? All marriages have spent time in each of the four seasons, Spring and Summer are filled with hope, excitement and peace. Dr. Gary Chapman will help you create a Spring/Summer marriage!
How do you deal with a spouse who has reconnected with a past boyfriend? Typically, reconnecting with a former boyfriend usually has romantic overtones. Kindly but firmly communicated that this cannot continue.
What season of marriage are you in - Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall? Marriages are perpetually in a state of transition. It has nothing to do with how long you've been married but the quality of your marriage.
What's the right approach in changing your spouse? Instead of trying to manipulate your spouse into changing, determine to make positive changes in your own life and behave appropriately, even if your spouse never changes.
What can parents do when their child's sexual behavior is inappropriate? The Christian way of approaching is to speak the truth in love.
A past relationship has negatively affected your ability to trust. Learn how you can keep your lack of trust from creeping into your new relationship.
Can your occupation determine your love language? Not really. But you might discover that some love languages are more helpful in certain vocations.
Kid's today dress in very strange and creative ways. Frankly, this isn't very important. The important issue is the heart.
Parents are often shocked and depressed when they discover that their child is homosexual. Instead of rejecting them, keep the doors of communication open. Share your hurt, but affirm your unconditional love.
A woman recently got married and moved from the city to her husband's small town. This was a hard adjustment. What can she do? Try to make the most of the situation. Take time to get to know the good people of the town. But make time to visit the city once in a while.
Is it wise to buy your child an iPod? There are many positive uses for a cellphone, but beware that they can be time wasters. Be sure to set limits and monitor their usage.
Christian parents, in particular, are often shocked to hear that their child is a homosexual. But they should love and communicate with them, even though they don't approve.
How can you tell if you're in a toxic workplace? If you feel drained emotionally and physically every time you go to work, you're place of employment is most likely toxic.
A loving person is a generous person. Generosity is giving your attention, time, abilities and money freely to others.
Your fiancé is a very giving person, but you worry about him giving away too much. In the Bible, giving is a virtue. But try to find a balance between giving and saving.
Where do you draw the line of physical intimacy before marriage? The Bible is very clear that there should be no sexual intercourse before marriage. You need to focus on getting to know each other intellectually, emotionally, socially and spiritually, and save the physical part for marriage.
Humility is the true mark of a Christian. The best example of humility was how Christ humbled himself to become a man and to serve us, even to the point of dying for our sins. Humility is stepping down so someone else can step up.
If the atmosphere at work is toxic and it's negatively affecting your mental and physical health, maybe it's time to move on.
A mark of a loving person is courtesy. The word "courtesy" is much richer than being well-mannered. It means you view others as valuable and treating the accordingly.
You love your fiancé but her family is hard to deal with? Will this be a problem for you in the future? Tune in to hear what Dr. Gary Chapman has to say.
How can you know if she's "THE ONE"? First and foremost, ask yourself if your hearts beat together spiritually. If you're not in harmony is this area, you might want to reconsider moving forward in your relationship.
Nobody's perfect. Patience is accepting the imperfections of the other. Not everyone is like you; so when they don't' measure up to your standards, give them the freedom to be different.
Kindness is one of the traits of love. It's expressed in the way we talk as well as what we do. Imagine what life would be like if all of us were kind!