A Love Language Minute draws from Dr. Gary Chapman's years of counseling experience, excerpts from his live events, and his answers to listeners' questions to give encouragement and practical help and hope for the relationships in your life.
What is the purpose of anger? The purpose of anger is to motivate us to set things right - to stimulate us to do something constructive to correct is wrong.
One of the strongest languages of apology is making restitution. If you're really sorry, make it a priory to speak your spouse's love language at all times. Dr. Gary Chapman recommends that you read his book When I'm Sorry Isn't Enough.
Most parents will be deeply disappointed with their child when they come out and tell you they're gay. Men and women are made for each other - it's God's design. Express your disappointment with them, but let them know that you'll always love them no matter what.
If your husband has a bad temper, what can you do to help? One effective way to help is to suggest that your husband read Dr. Gary Chapman's book called Anger - Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way.
If you are truly sorry for how you've hurt someone, you must verbally apologize. But the evidence of true sorrow should be confirmed by your change in behavior.
What is the true source of anger? When you feel anger, you'll notice that it's because someone is not doing what's right. That feeling comes naturally to us because we are made in God's image, and He's deeply concerned about things being right.
When you hurt someone, you immediately know that you've placed an emotional barrier between you and your spouse. Your relationship is now fractured, and it's time to apologize. Make sure you apologize to them in their primary language of apology.
What if you and your spouse score equally on the love language test? Express your love for them in all 5 love languages, but make sure you emphasize your love for them in their primary love language.
When you and your spouse are separated due to travel, how do you express your love to them if their love language is physical touch? Call and tell them how much you would want to express your love in a physical way if they were at home. Your spouse will feel your love emotionally.
We are emotional creatures, and one of our deepest desires it to feel loved. The feeling of being in love isn't meant to last forever. The heart of love is making the choice to affirm your love in the love language of your spouse.
What is the true source of anger? Anger is rooted in our God-given sense of right and wrong because we are made in God's image. We want what's just and fair because God desires justice and fairness.
Research shows that the "in love" feeling isn't really love at all. Falling in love isn't a conscious choice, it's a feeling. True love is a choice that requires effort and seeks the well-being of the other person.
What do you do when your "in love" feelings begin to wear off? Understand that those feelings will wear off over time, but emotional love will endure the test of time if you learn to speak each other's love language.
When you discover that your marriage has areas that need to be improved, make it a point to attend a marriage conference for a tune up.
The euphoric experience of falling in love may give you the illusion of having an intimate relationship. It's not that you're insincere about what you think and feel, but it's unrealistic to assume you and your spouse will never hurt each other in the future.
Sometimes you may say "I forgive you" but it's obvious by your behavior that you haven't. You won't be able to forgive if you haven't lifted the penalty of their offense.
Falling in love is a euphoric experience. But that euphoric feeling may blind you to things about that person that you don't see. Be open to listening to trusted family and friends and ask for their observations.
Being sexually active before marriage will negatively affect your upcoming marriage. All of your past failures will affect your present and your future.
Before committing to marry someone, it's wise to look into that person's past. You may discover that there are things in their past that you'll find impossible to live with.
If you find it impossible to forgive someone who's hurt you, remember how much you have been forgiven by God.
Would you like to have an intimate marriage? If so, be intentional about carving out time in your busy schedule to talk and listen to your spouse.
How do you bring up the subject of marriage while dating? When a couple has been dating for at least a year, it's quite appropriate to being up the subject. If the response is negative, it probably makes sense to stop dating that person and move on.
If a couple discovers that they both have the same love language, it's easier on their relationship. However, they may have a preferred way of expressing their love within that shared love language.
One reason why couples struggle in their marriage is that their parents might not have been good role models in how to have a healthy marriage.
Instead of continually reminding your spouse about how much they hurt you, take those hurt feelings to the Lord and ask Him to help you forgive. Consider how much you've offended God, and how graciously He has forgiven you.
What is a desperate marriage? It's one in which one of the individuals is involved in a lifestyle that is extremely detrimental to the relationship. If this sounds like your marriage, you can find help in Dr. Gary Chapman's book Desperate Marriages.
Is it right for newly weds to accept the offer of a loan from their parents? There's no right or wrong answer, but it depends on the nature or their relationship.
If your wife's primary love language is Words of Affirmation but yours is not, you're going to have a big learning curve. Observe how other people express words of affirmation, practice them yourself, then express them to your wife.
What is the purpose of sex in marriage? What was God's design? Scriptures reveals 3 purposes: Procreation, Companionship, and Pleasure.
When someone has sinned against you, you only have two alternative responses - demanding justice or extending forgiveness. We should always forgive because we have been forgiven by God.
As a couple, our sexual needs and desires will never be met unless we express those needs and desires to our spouse.
Early exposure to pornography imprints those images in our minds. The good news is, the blood of Jesus covers our sin. Through prayer, visualize the blood of Jesus flowing over all of those images.
Does the 5 Love Languages apply to children with special needs? Since every child needs love, this is true for special needs children as well. It's crucial that we discover what their love language is and give them heavy doses of it!
In our society today, many people have been involved sexually before marriage. The commonly held view is that sexual experience better prepares us for marriage. All the research indicates otherwise.
The circle of confession should be as large as the circle of sin.
Some Christians have a negative attitude toward sex. This may be due to distorted sex education or an unfortunate sexual experience as a child.
Can a person's primary love language ever change? Dr. Gary Chapman says your primary love language stays with you for a lifetime. But is can change momentarily during certain season's of life.
You and your spouse are always at odds with each other. The first step in resolving your differences is learning how to respect each other's ideas, even when you don't agree.
Contrary to the opinion of some, sex is not a topic that God finds taboo. In fact, sex was God's idea!
Are you pleased with the way you invested your time and energy so far this year? Are there changes that need to be made? Maybe it's time to find a balance in where you put your time and energy.
When we sin against God, it breaks our fellowship. The relationship can only be restored through repentance. The same is true in human relationships.
What can be done to get your spouse to be more intimate with you? Find out why this is the case, and then take the necessary steps to correct it.
In the context of dating, it's crucial that the couple gets to know each other on a deeper level. This includes getting to know each other's love language.
A relationship cannot be restored unless the person who has sinned is willing to admit that they've sinned. This opens the door to forgiveness.
As a husband, spending more time with your kids might allow your wife to spend more time with you!
If your spouse is a chronic spender, the best way to deal with it is to come up with a budget that you and your spouse can agree on. Build into that budget a portion for each spouse to spend as they choose.
How does a couple in the military show love to each other while deployed? This is especially difficult when their love language is physical touch. There are many creative ways to show your love - emotional love.
Some people never accept responsibility for their actions. It's most likely because they were never taught to take responsibility for their actions when they were children.
God not only give you the principles on which to build a healthy marriage, He also gives you the power to follow these principles.
Has it been a good year so far? We might say "no" when referring to our finances, health or marriage. These things might be beyond our control, but the one thing we can control is our attitude.